The Life that Never Lived ? (Prisoner of Azkaban)
by bookhater
Summary: After two very stressful years, the group of five is convinced nothing to awful can happen this year! Yet the longer Harry remains in their presence, he's sure he must remember something about Sirius... Part of my reading the ? books series. Status: Completed, Part of my reading the books series, no book content inside.
1. OWL POST

Important Author's Note!: Yes this series is complete in its entirety, but I have to email you if you want copies with book content, apologies.

* * *

Next morning dawned very bright and early for the household, despite their late evening they were all up and around well before a normal breakfast. Since he was the first one up, Sirius decided to make breakfast before Lily could kick him out of the kitchen, which also meant breakfast was a very quick affair. They were all settled down and ready to read within an hour of being awake, highly anxious to get reading again.

Sirius, having finished off last time, passed the book along to Harry for his start.

"Oh come on Harry, you're not that weird," James said bracingly, "odd stuff just seems to happen to you."

Harry grinned lightly without looking up, deciding to read the reasons he felt he was so weird before he really believed him.

"So do I," Sirius mock pouted, "so are you saying I'm unusual."

Before Harry could even answer, Remus really did mock him, saying, "Sirius, Harry doesn't have to say that. I'm saying it for him."

While Harry laughed at the pair, Sirius just huffed and grumbled a bit with a smile.

"That's not so odd either," Lily chuckled, getting into this now, "I enjoyed doing my homework all the time. It was always something fun and unusual."

"That's just because you didn't grow up around magic," James rolled his eyes, "if you did, you'd just think of it as boring homework."

Then they all grimaced in disgust as they now firmly remembered where exactly Harry was, and why he would be doing that.

"Right," James drew the word out in disbelief. "So what about all of that made you unusual again?"

"Well when you put it like that it's not," Harry chuckled, "but sitting around thinking about it..." he trailed off.

They all smiled indulgently at him, pleased he truly did seem to be relaxing and finally making more jokes.

"I actually remember that essay vividly," Lily giggled, "it was pretty funny to find out the lengths wizards go to hide themselves from Muggles, when Muggles can't hardly find us when we're not even trying to hide."

"I can't imagine how she got her nickname," Sirius said, mock-puzzled and wondering why she didn't just perform that charm herself, rather than being 'caught.'

"How did that work though?" Harry asked, realizing the book wasn't going to explain further. "The Muggles would have been sitting there watching, and wouldn't they have noticed she wasn't burning up?"

Remus happily explained, "since the smoke was in everyone's eyes so much, they most often did these in open fields and such, they could just disappear before the charm wore off. Anyone who heard the loud crack it makes, just assumed it was logs or even the bones breaking, stuff like that."

Harry nodded in understanding, having a pang in his chest as he realized this kind of answer would never go in his essay, because he hadn't been able to ask them this. It was the small, little things that still got to him and reminded him that his home life really had sucked.

"I always wanted to ask," Harry butted in again, "why do we use quills, instead of pens?"

Both Lily and Remus released bursts of laughter at this, Lily explaining, "trust me, I think every muggle-born's asked that at some point or another. Professor Flitwick explained it saying that it's just more traditional. He tried to give a muggle comparison, saying it's why some teachers still want you to use print instead or cursive on your homework, even though there's no real difference at the end results."

Harry shrugged and said thanks, happy that random little thing was explained.

Their good mood was gone in an instance, all wanting to threaten or far worse to those Muggles Harry was forced to live with, but Harry wasn't hearing of it as he read on loudly.

Sirius began saying something rather foul at once, but Harry was still diligently ignoring them and continuing.

"Medieval, that about sums it up," Lily agreed bitterly.

Even Harry couldn't keep a hitch out of his voice as he forced himself to read that.

This time Harry had to cut across all four of them trying to continue their threats, but Harry refused to let them get on for long. He didn't want their tempers' spiking, and for them to possibly rile themselves up enough to go out and act on those threats.

"Who exactly is anyone?" James scoffed in disgust. "It's not like they have any friends."

Harry just sighed, not really wanting to indulge them and explain that the Dursleys were very neighbourly people, often boasting loudly about the goings on of their life. He didn't quite know what the neighbourhood thought he'd been doing the past two years at school, but he knew without a doubt the Dursleys hadn't been saying it in a good way.

This time they didn't actually try and cut Harry off, realizing he wasn't going to let them, so they quietly simmered and grouched about that line.

"I can see that," Lily agreed fairly, before any of the boys could get in a more biased opinion, "a teacher would have the right to scold you for not doing homework. Though admittedly," she continued even more loudly when James looked about to cutting her off, "I do wish you had explained why you wouldn't be able to do your homework."

Harry just shrugged, knowing that Snape wouldn't have cared no matter what, and never having bothered with the other teachers either.

Remus muttered something under his breath that caused Sirius to release a bark-like laughter, causing James to scowl at them mostly because he wasn't in on the joke.

"Glad to see Fred and George taught you that nifty little trick," James approved.

"That's my pup," Sirius grinned from ear to ear, "stick it to those bloody Muggles."

All four of them were beyond pleased Harry seemed more and more likely to stand up to that rubbish family of his and even doing small things like this boosted their moral of the ratty situation.

"As opposed to?" Lily asked, genuinely curious.

"Just, a normal bad mood," Harry shrugged, unable to really explain that any other way.

"So, what did they blame you for doing?" James asked without really wanting to hear the answer.

Harry sighed, remembering quite well that this essay marked the time passing from when Ron had called him. He explained the whole fiasco, which both delighted and infuriated them all at the same time. Harry regretted having told them this though when he realized the book was about to explain it, so it's not like they could move past this.

"At least he tried," James sighed.

"Wow," Lily muttered, rubbing at her ear, "when you said he shouted, you meant it."

"Guess next time, you should go into a bit more details with Arthur," Remus sighed.

Harry was looking down at the pages sadly, suddenly realizing that he had left out the part where Vernon had shouted at him for this mess, but had merely said this is what caused them to be extra mad at him. Now the book was possibly going to show something he didn't particularly want his family to hear... sighing in defeat he pressed on.

Not even Lily felt pity for this horrid man, she joined in as they laughed just a bit cruelly at his ignorance of the situation.

"Poor Ron," Sirius chuckled, "he probably doesn't even understand he's doing anything wrong, since that arse is responding in exactly the same way."

"Where did he even get a hold of a phone?" James suddenly asked. "That's not something he'd have around his house."

"I asked," Harry shrugged, "he said his Dad apparated him into town to use one."

"Wait, you could still write to him?" Remus asked eagerly, misunderstanding how Harry had asked, "So did you pick the lock on Hedwig's cage this summer?" Remembering all too well the injustice done to that poor bird last summer.

"Actually," Harry fully grinned this time, and deciding against correcting his assumption; really he had asked on the train ride home last year. "I really was just allowed to let her out at night. Uncle- err," he corrected himself at once for the slip that he knew they all hated for addressing them as any type of family, "Vernon hated the racket so much he said I could so long as the neighbours didn't see her."

"Probably the most decent thing they've done in their life," Lily beamed, taking this small victory.

"Even if it was for the most selfish of reasons," James agreed.

Sirius couldn't help but chuckle at the mental image.

"Uh-oh," they all muttered, Harry had left the part out that he'd been in the room when this happened.

"I wish," James grumbled, enjoying that for a moment longer.

"He is a bloody paranoid one, isn't he?" Remus said in an almost conversational tone of voice, if his hands weren't white knuckled from what he was dearly trying not to picture that man doing to Harry in retaliation for this. "Honestly, one stupid phone call, and he thinks Ron's going to kill them all?"

"Wish he would," Sirius huffed, "actually I wish Arthur or Molly would really go over there sometime this summer, and take Harry with them, and then never come back."

"If only," Harry agreed, though he really did want to move on now, never letting himself think like this for too long, since it wouldn't ever come true.

Lily released a pitiful moan at that description, not even wanting to think on what this could mean...

"Wait, wait, back up!" Sirius demanded. "Is that all he did? Shout at you."

"Yes," Harry said quickly...a little too quickly. They'd all had this moment before, where they genuinely wanted to question what exactly Harry was hiding about his home life there. It was something, of that they were all sure by this point, but the last time they had tried to press on the matter further Harry had gotten very uptight about the matter and had refused to speak on it, saying it wasn't important.

There were several options, none of them good, that would cause him to do this. They wanted desperately to know, but feared if they forced Harry to tell without making one hundred percent sure he trusted them first, it could break the rather tentative hold they had on said trust. So they didn't question the obvious lie, and waited patiently for Harry to divulge the information willingly, well as patiently as any of them really could be. They weren't subtle about giving Harry looks that said quite clearly 'liar.'

Harry ignored all this, now reading on as fast as possible.

"Now that I'm not sure of," Lily disagreed, "since I can assume I'm right in saying you've never told your friends about how you're treated there. So Hermione wouldn't have found it odd at all to mention she knew you from school."

Harry just shrugged, muttering, "yeah, guess so," before quickly pressing on, they all noted Harry didn't exactly answer the first part of his mother's question.

"Wait, what?" Remus snapped. "I thought you said Hedwig was allowed out? Why on earth aren't you sending them mail?"

"I said I wouldn't," Harry said like he thought it was obvious, rather annoyed he really couldn't just skip this part.

"Harry," James groaned, "this is one time you could have lied! Merlin, they wouldn't even know the difference."

Harry just shrugged again, which was all too common an occurrence whenever this type of thing was brought up. Usually the boy was more than willing to talk and interact with them, asking questions and demanding details, and always more than willing to say what went on around school where some of the deadliest things had happened to him. The fact that he was so closed up about this particular subject continued scaring them the longer this dragged on.

They all clenched up and muttered a bit more, and were growing beyond frustrated at Harry's not letting them get a word in this time.

"Props for finding that," James grinned weakly, happy he had any reason to do so again. Merlin, were they only on the first chapter and he was already feeling like crap again?

Then the four of them released pitiful sighs, knowing by now not to even ask about how this birthday was going to go, and only hoping it went at least a little better than last year...Merlin almost anything would be better than last year!

"Yeah, I've got nothing for that," James huffed in disgust, wishing with everything he owned he could fix that. His friends clearly couldn't do anything for Harry, even on this day in particular, so Harry's hatred for his birthday was both founded, and unarguable, plus just down right depressing.

"Congratulations Harry," Sirius said in a falsely bright voice, "we agree, you're unusual."

Harry really did laugh then, making them all feel just that little bit better.

Harry joined in on their wince of pain this time, not really appreciating that little reminder.

"I can see how you would find that depressing," James sighed.

"Fair point on that," Remus agreed, "so you were right twice over now."

Harry just smiled weakly this time, knowing they weren't about to appreciate his remembering of how he got this scar, so hoping to get past this part quickly he speed read.

'Pig's tail' Lily comforted herself when she made to start screaming all over again because of that lie 'just remember, they did get their due.'

James winced, and he probably always would whenever he was forced to hear that sentence. It didn't matter how many times it appeared, it would never not be weird, and heart-breaking.

There were several times many of them made to interrupt during that summarization of his last thirteen years of life, but it wasn't anything he hadn't heard already, and it was depressing enough to think about in his spare time. He didn't want his family to be sitting around thinking about it anymore than he had to.

"Crap," they all muttered at once, thinking 'it wasn't possible!' Harry was in a town full of Muggles, nothing too dangerous could be happening to him...right?

"Glad you at least had that sense," Lily said uneasily.

"What was it?" Remus asked, mixtures of eagerness and fear still lingering.

Harry chuckled when he told them, making Lily say, "aw, the poor thing," while the boys laughed at the scene Harry described.

"He's not really dead, is he?" Lily noted with worry even though she knew Harry would read that with more concern if the bird was harmed.

"Oh, hey!" James yelped, grinning with glee now. "So this means Ron did send you something! Ha, can't imagine why he hasn't done it before now."

"He knew he'd gotten me in trouble," Harry reminded.

"Yes," Sirius waved his hand, trying to avoid screaming about that 'trouble' all over again, "but that was because of the phone. Why wouldn't he have sent you mail again?"

Harry just sighed, he understood Ron's reasons, but he didn't know how to explain it to them.

"It's a good thing you were awake for this anyway," Lily said, going back to the original point of this, "because that would have been odd to wake up for."

Lily beamed with unsuppressed glee, happy to see Harry taking the time to help out this owl rather than go right to his mail.

"Nice," Sirius grinned, "so you got your Hogwarts letter on top of everything else today, and," he continued almost bouncing with glee, "that'll contain your Hogsmeade letter?"

For just a moment, Harry went as bright-eyed as Sirius. He'd heard all about Hogsmeade from the older students, and he was as keen to go as anyone, then that smile trickled right off his face when he realized who he was going to have to ask to sign it. They all noted his changing expression at once, and sadly didn't have to ask what it was about.

They all dearly wanted to sit around and make threats that those useless Dursleys had better sign Harry's form, but recognized it would only make Harry feel worse the longer they leaned on the subject, so they just desperately hoped Harry found a way to convince them.

Harry couldn't help it, his voice spiked with emotion as well, feeling a little silly something so small would mean so much to him, but not any kind of ashamed the people in the room all looked as if it was their own birthday as well. Surely, since they seemed just as happy if not more than him about this, it wasn't silly at all.

"Sweet," Lily grinned, "no one deserves that as much as them!"

"Best thing that could have happened to them," James agreed.

Harry at once began wondering why this photo felt significant. Why would it mean anything to him, except a nice reminder of his favourite family (outside of his own right now.) He brushed past it, wondering if he was really losing it.

"Wish I could see that picture," Sirius chuckled, "must be funny to see them all squeezed in so tight for the camera."

Harry gave a little start and gave Sirius quite a look, one the others didn't even know how to describe. It wasn't truly recognition, but Harry knew this sentence was important to him... it was gone. He just shrugged, not really letting himself think about it too much since it was probably nothing.

"Hey, you said there were nine of them in the picture," Remus pouted, "how come you didn't finally describe the mysterious Charlie and Bill Weasley."

"Cause the picture wasn't that good," Harry shrugged, "just an old black and white one, and I could pick out two I didn't recognize. I'm sure I meet them eventually," he finished with conviction.

Sirius couldn't help but release a surprised snort of laughter, while James said, "a fair thing to think, if you'd never worked one before and didn't know."

"Thank Merlin," Lily chuckled.

"I don't know, I agree with Harry," Remus laughed, "it did come in handy there at the end."

"Yes well, it was gone now, so we couldn't have kept it anyways," Harry reminded, still grinning.

"Just thinking about that sentence without knowing the background of it," Sirius cackled, "makes it even more priceless!"

"So, I forgot to ask," Lily said, having to speak a bit louder than usual over Sirius for Harry to hear her, "did you ever tell anyone about the car? Or is it still in the Forest?"

"I told Dumbledore and McGonagall how we got away from the spiders," Harry admitted, "but as far as I know, no one went in and got it out. It's still in there."

"Where I hope it stays," James grinned.

"That brings up a good point I hadn't thought of," Lily said, frowning once again as she asked, "how are you going to get your school supplies this year? There's no way they're going to drive you up to London, and even if they did I certainly don't want them knowing about your Gringotts Vault."

Harry just shrugged, saying honestly, "can't remember exactly, but I wouldn't worry about it too much. I'm sure when Ron gets back from Egypt, I can go stay round his place again, and someone there would have made sure I'd gone." Harry frowned as he finished saying this, feeling how wrong those words were. He got his school supplies, no the part that was bothering him was in saying he stayed with Ron. He had a very bad feeling all of a sudden, like something had happened at the Dursleys... the thought was gone. Even now as he decided not to push it, he could feel the beginnings of a pounding headache returning even as he thought to try, so with nothing else for it he read.

All four of them scowled heavily, wondering just how much Harry had told his friends about how that lot treated him. Just like with any other time though, whenever they asked Harry about it, he remained suspiciously closed up.

"Oh, this ought to be great," Sirius muttered sourly, as if that boy wasn't big-headed enough already, no now he was given even more responsibility.

"Nice, it's a Sneakoscope," James said eagerly, finding this a rather fun toy when he was a kid.

"A bit useless around school, what with so much untrustworthy students hanging around," Remus chuckled, "but fun all the same."

Harry dearly wanted to ask what it was, or what it did, but hoping Ron might explain he instead read.

"Nonsense," Sirius scoffed, "they're plenty useful."

"That'll do it," Lily chuckled, "those twins are as untrustworthy as it comes."

"Well that's a bit harsh," James grinned without any real heat, knowing she didn't mean it. "I like them, they're good for a laugh."

"Which explains why I don't trust them," Lily smiled indulgently at him and all the other boys who were chuckling at their joshing.

'I don't know' Remus thought, frowning suddenly 'I don't trust any of those Dursleys as far as I can throw them, so I really wouldn't have been too surprised if it had gone off then.' It hadn't though, so he just ignored it for now.

"Aw," Lily cooed, "Hedwig went out to find Hermione, that is so sweet! I love your owl."

Harry nodded in fervent agreement.

"About as alright as he ever is there," James muttered bitterly.

Harry sighed, wishing desperately the book would quite mentioning this now.

"Which is another reason we invented our own postal system," Sirius chuckled.

"Why haven't you subscribed to that yet?" James asked curiously.

"Hadn't quite found it relevant enough yet," Harry shrugged, "reading the paper just didn't interest me."

"Oh yes," Remus nodded, trying his hardest to sound serious as he continued. "I am so sure learning's exactly what's on Ron's mind as he goes around those pyramids," he couldn't hold the expression much longer as he burst into laughter.

All four boys gawked at this, while Lily simply smirked and shrugged, completely unsurprised by this.

They all chuckled, glad to see Hermione still had her sense of humour.

James and Sirius frowned at the thought, but Lily and Remus scoffed, as Remus said, "I doubt that. Hermione might be bad around exam time, but she's hardly pressured either of you to be studying more. No, I'm sure Hermione got you something she thought you'd really like."

Harry looked very eager and curious now as he read.

"Nice," all five of them praised, Remus giving his two friends rather superior looks.

"Alright Moony," Sirius scoffed, "knock off that, so you were right, again."

Harry chuckled affectionately as Remus' look only increased.

"Can't blame you there," Sirius agreed with a groan, it had been ages since he'd been out flying, let alone played a game.

"One of?" James questioned, a teasing smirk lighting his features.

Harry smirked and said, "yes, one of. I'm sure you can guess the other."

Sirius and Remus both snorted in appreciation at James rather put out look, he had been hoping Harry would correct him and say that his invisibility cloak was his most treasured object, and here his own son was, obviously teasing him and purposely saying the exact opposite.

"Oh, so Hagrid sent you a letter along with your Hogwarts' stuff," Lily beamed, "wonder what he's been up to this summer."

"Snapped?" Remus yelped, fear coming back at once. "What on earth could Hagrid have sent you that snap's?"

Harry was frowning, trying his best to describe what he had only gotten a glimpse of, but he wasn't doing a good job, so he turned back to the book in hopes for a better description.

Sirius released a weak chuckle, no one was going to argue Harry on that point.

"And that's just the tip of it all," James muttered.

"A book?" Lily repeated faintly.

"A biting book?" James probed, looking like he was sure Harry was messing with him this time.

Now knowing the book in his hands was going to properly explain he read on curiously.

Sirius released a low, throaty whistle as he said, "damn, points for originality anyway. A book about monsters, that's kind of a monster itself."

"Guess it's no weirder than the invisibility books on invisibility," James agreed, still frowning at the odd little thing, and unable to stop himself from wondering why Hagrid would have sent that to Harry.

"But this would have been such a sight to walk in on," Remus muttered, "a book attacking them." Still hoping right along with Harry that the momentary humour it would have provided at the Dursleys freaking out over this wasn't really going to happen, in favour of what they might do after the shock had worn off.

"Must have been quite the sight," Sirius really did laugh this time, unable to help himself at the rather annoyed look on Harry's face that he was being bested by a book!

Then all four of them winced, already sick of this constant enjoyment flashing to fear and anger every other paragraph, all because of the house he was in.

Even Lily couldn't stop herself from giggling at that image, it must have been quite a sight.

"That's right," James suddenly brightened, "Harry's taking Care of Magical Creatures this year! Hagrid might have sent that to him, for a jump start on the class."

"Well that was nice," Lily sighed, "though I'd much rather he'd just sent him whatever the school says."

"Tell you what?" Sirius asked in confusion.

"Why on earth would any of us know," Harry pointed out, grinning over at him. Sirius shrugged, smirking right back.

They all sighed, that old pang returning with a vengeance. Harry shouldn't have had to worry about asking permission for this, it should have been as simple as him going to see his parents and having a nice conversation about all the shops available. This horrid reminder that he couldn't do this hurt worse every time they thought about it.

"I did that all the time," Sirius nodded in agreement, "it helps the wait not seem as long."

Harry shared another smile with Sirius, oddly happy they had such a random thing in common.

"Well that was a depressing end," Remus said in a forced chipper voice as he leaned over to take the book.

"And it's only going to get worse," Harry muttered, now knowing that vague feeling from before was growing stronger inside. Something really awful happened on this birthday, which was saying something when compared to his other birthdays.

* * *

Because someone asked, and it's a very good question, no there will not be anyone else joining the reading series. I did seriously consider adding Hermione and Ron sometime during the fourth book, but I'm still enjoying my idea that they don't really know what's going on. If any other people did join from the future, then they would ruin all sorts of stuff like Sirius, and Dumbledore, and countless other death's I'm still going to enjoy being a surprise. I could erase their memory, but it's the same reason I'm not going to be adding anyone from this timeline. If I have any other characters from their own time join, like say Molly and Arthur, then I would have to constantly deal with go back and read the book themselves, or 'we'll explain later' and just yeah not worth it. The five that are there are what you guys got.

P.s. If there are any book mistakes you'd like me to explain feel free to ask, and I will try and go back and fix them. Geeze this chapter's almost as much my talking as the characters.


	2. AUNT MARGE'S BIG MISTAKE

Something else I feel like I should note, again just because one person asked and I feel like telling you all at once, Harry only has the mindset of his current age in the books. I made him approximately twenty something because I wanted him physically old enough that it was obvious this story takes place after all of the Harry Potter books. So if you guys are thinking that he's acting a little odd, or childlike, that's why.

* * *

Remus began his chapter with high notes of unease, hoping against hope this book would just gloss over Harry's time at this horrid house and go straight to the train ride.

He grunted in annoyance as those hopes were immediately dashed, and prepared himself for the worst.

Lily released several scathing retorts under her breath all over again, and now that Harry wasn't the one reading Remus sat there and let her vent about how Dudley had been given a present just for being there, while her son got yelled at for the stupidest things.

Harry just sighed and looked to the ceiling, knowing if they were already so ticked off about something like that, this was going to be a long chapter.

"You poor dear," Sirius snarled, "how about we just shove a toilet under your fat arse, and you'll never have to move again!"

"That was disgusting," James noted pleasantly, "mostly because I don't think he'd disagree with the idea."

"Ew," Lily muttered, her nose wrinkling in disgust. There was obesity for health reasons, and then there was this tub of lard.

Remus couldn't help but clench his teeth in frustration, unlike Harry he wasn't ever going to just brush something like that off.

Remus froze, that same look still on his face as he just stared down at the next word.

"What?" Sirius chuckled, trying to lean over and peak, and slightly disturbed Remus wasn't trying to stop him. "Someone we know?" Then his face too froze in the exact same expression.

"What?" James asked impatiently, annoyed his friends were obviously in on something he wasn't.

Harry sighed in frustration, and got up to go and grab the book away and check for himself, knowing he was least likely to react too badly to whatever it was. Then he too went rigid, and gave the room a very confused look. Before his parents could ask, again, Harry finally read the name of this convict.

James and Lily blinked several times while giving Sirius rather upset looks, James asking hesitantly, "ah, so, what's your brother been up to then?"*

That shook them out of their shock, at least Sirius who was now shaking his head like a wet dog and looking at the book pitifully as he said, "clearly something awful if he's wound on up the Muggle news."

Lily swallowed hard, rather unfond of the idea any of Sirius' relatives still wandering around, none of them were very good people. Also the injustice that anyone as awful as them had survived, and Sirius hadn't, wasn't something she missed either.

Remus got up and took the book back from Harry, still giving Sirius concerned looks. Admittedly, unlike James, his first instinct had been to think it was Sirius, but that was just because of his personal relation to the name. He had clearly just jumped to a stupid conclusion.

Sirius opened, then closed his mouth, torn between wanting to snap at this pompous jerk, or defend a family he outright hated. He settled for just grumbling inarticulately.

"My hearts broken for you," James snapped, feeling testy at once as he purposely ruffled up his own hair.

"Eesh," Sirius muttered, wrinkling up his face in disgust, "sounds like they've been having fun. Wish you had described them a bit better."

"Do you really want to know who this is?" Remus asked curiously.

"Sure," he shrugged, a devilish grin playing across his face, "I'd love it if it was my dad or something, would make my day to find out he wound up in prison."

The others rolled their eyes at Sirius' dark humour, while Harry was frowning in remembrance. The picture on the screen had stirred up something inside of him, and staring at Sirius just made some of those features stand out... but then Remus was reading again, and Harry put the odd, sunken similarities from that picture and the man sitting in front of him down to a genetic resemblance.

"Probably Azkaban, if it's one of my lot," Sirius smirked.

"Or it might even be a Muggle you've no relation to, and they did just escaped from a normal prison," Lily shrugged, "it's not unheard of."

"Even better," Sirius outright cheered now, "Mum would die on the spot if she found out a Muggle shared our last name."

That dried up the humour, just a bit. That's all they needed, was for an escaped convict to come running up the very street Harry was in. Knowing his luck, he'd smack right into them. Wizard or not, they wanted this escapee as far away from Harry as possible.

Lily grunted and thought of a few more insults to throw her way.

"So, she doesn't have a job?" James asked randomly, never having thought to question before what these putrid people did in their spare time.

"No," Harry shook his head, "she's a housewife."

James just shrugged, as uncaring about the answer if Harry had said she was a brain surgeon, it still didn't excuse how she treated his son.

Lily frowned as she snapped, "oh? And what if you'd convicted the wrong person? What if you'd just thrown an innocent man to the gallows?"

Harry blinked spasmodically for a moment, now why did he feel so strongly about that? The others were mostly nodding in agreement though, and didn't seem to notice Harry trying to force down such a feeling.

Harry instantly went from curious and self-introspecting, to outright horror.

This they did notice, James demanding at once, "what, what's that look?"

Harry shuddered in disgust as he said, "he was joking right? Please tell me he didn't just say who I think he did?!"

"Why?" Remus demanded, sadly confirming to Harry the name he did hear.

"Great," Harry ground out, frowning and looking far angrier than any of them had seen him so far when around this place, and mostly he just kept his mouth pretty tight shut about these Dursleys. Hoping for something Sirius prodded, "so, you going to answer? What's the big deal with her?"

Harry huffed in disgust as he finally said, "you're not going to like the answer."

Well that wasn't encouraging, at all. Remus now went back to the book with dread.

Lily sighed wearily as she now remembered, back during the first book, and a Marge having been mentioned. When asked though, Harry had simply said he didn't like her, and that was back when he was still reestablishing all of his child hood memories, more a feeling then outright knowledge of her, and he'd still hated her. Now he clearly and very vividly remembered what had prompted that, and his reaction in the book wasn't any more promising than the one in the room.

Sirius ground his teeth together in deepest disgust. He, like the others, hated Harry having to call these excuse for humans any kind of relation, let alone the stupid Dursleys forcing Harry to extend it further!

Harry groaned and let his head fall back against the couch with a whump. Great, the book was clearly going to go into details, which meant he was going to have to play another round of 'please don't leave the house and kill!'

Remus gave Harry a very concerned look, but he recognized Harry was reacting because of what he was about to hear, not in true pain. Both curious and already enraged at the way his little Cub was reacting, he read fearfully.

That was all it took, this small petty injustice to set up a howl the neighbours probably heard. Harry just groaned again and tried to repeat what was quickly losing steam 'it's already happened, just wait it out.'

Harry desperately wished he could remember more vividly why it was so important they didn't leave this house, but his mind was blank and unhelpful as ever.

Harry's family were more infuriated then they would have anticipated, it was just so horrifying to realize yet another person from Harry's younger years seemed to go out of their way to mistreat him, just for living?! When the silence finally dimmed down to almost normal levels Harry cautioned that it was only going to get worse, then reminded them of their promise they wouldn't go killing her no matter what she did. He was just really hoping this book would leave out one memory in particular...

'Did Harry ever get a decent life?' They mentally outraged all over again, but this time kept it a little better in check.

Harry groaned again, yep this was the one. He was beginning to wonder if this book hated him.

"Midnight," Sirius growled, sounding rather close to how Ripper had sounded then. Harry just gave him a sheepish grin, saying, "that was pretty good Sirius."

Sirius gave Harry a haughty look, none of them appreciated him blowing that off as a joke. They would never in this life understand how Harry was just so blasé about the abuse these people constantly did to him, while turning around and spoiling Dudley so much he was sick. Harry though, looked beyond wanting to move this along, and forcing him to talk about it now wouldn't mean anything good. He had to want to talk about it.

"How about I just punch you in your stupid face, I'm sure that'll make you cry to," James hissed under his breath.

"Back off." Remus snapped, hating the idea of anyone threatening his cub, let alone someone he had no doubts would carry through on said threats.

"Now why does that sound familiar," Sirius said under his breath, "oh, I know, old Snape went out of his way to stop and watch us get told off!"

"Usually, he had something to do with us getting caught too," James agreed, making Sirius realize he hadn't spoken as quietly as he meant to.

"Ha!" Remus barked. They all grinned now, despite how much they wanted to break Vernon's finger and get it out of Harry's face, at least Harry was giving them attitude right back.

Despite Lily's glee though, she seemed to be the only one truly worried about the fact that Harry could get punished all the more for talking back...

"It's not like he does it on purpose," James frowned in defence of his son, "I'm sure he'd be just as happy as you if stuff would quite happening to him."

"You're right," Harry nodded, "I do agree."

Sirius opened, then closed his mouth in disgust when he heard that. James went bright red in the face as he growled, "they're saying you're a criminal!"

Harry couldn't help but be just as furious as them this time, and actually didn't make an attempt to correct them. He put up with a lot from the Dursleys for the sake of peace, but what on earth had he done to them to deserve being called a criminal?

"I'd like to see Dudley sent there," Remus snapped.

"Why would they even say that?" Lily growled. "Thought they were going for this perfect image!"

"Gave them more pity I suppose," Sirius muttered, "made them sympathetic or something they had to deal with such a horrid kid. It honestly half makes sense if you look at it from the neighbor perspectives, like maybe Harry dressed and looked the way he did not cause the Dursleys forced it, but because Harry did it on purpose. Least it explains why the neighbors never questioned why the two boys are so different."

To Harry's surprise no one looked confused at Sirius offering up this except him, and he was once again left wondering just how much experience Sirius was putting in those words.

"Like he's not already in trouble there anyways," Lily snarled.

"How," James moaned into his hands, "how on earth does this actually seem to get worse as you get older!"

Harry really couldn't think of anything to say for comfort to that, and decided declining that he had a bad feeling this was only going to get a lot more disagreeable to them the longer this wore on.

"Think I like him better that way anyway," Remus grumbled, "the less he moves, the less he can annoy me."

"I will be impressed if you can even see it under all the fat," Sirius snapped.

"Can't blame you for that," Remus agreed.

"Yeah?" James asked, perking up at once. "That would be?"

"I think you're going to like this," Harry grinned as answer. Very intrigued, Remus decided to read his answer instead of asking this time.

"As if I wanted to come," Harry muttered, "like I want to spend any more time with them then I have to."

"Because it would show you're a decent human being for one stupid second!" James howled.

"Five seconds, that's all it would take him to scrawl his name across a piece of paper," Lily snarled.

"Yes, but since most of his life has been trying to do the opposite of whatever I want..." Harry reminded, trailing off with a wince at the venomous looks that weren't actually directed at him, but they kind of scared him all the same. This is why he tried staying so closed up during these Dursley talks, watching the hatred on his family's faces scared him far more than his memories of that household.

"I get it," James suddenly went from contemplating murder to giddy pleasure when he realized what his son was up to, "very clever, working them in your favour like that."

Harry glanced around and noted that the others had all caught on as well, even his Mom who didn't look any kind of concerned. In fact, if Harry didn't know any better, she looked almost as pleased as the trouble making boys.

"Something I would pay good money to see," Sirius grinned.

Which drained away any humour at Harry for this violent man's actions. Harry was frowning, but didn't look remotely bothered by this threat, which bothered the others nearly as much as the threat itself.

Either Vernon really never had gone through with the threat and physically hurt Harry, so Harry didn't believe he would this time. That didn't track with the other times that Harry had previously been threatened. He had seemed genuinely afraid and very sure said man would carry through, plus the fact that Harry refused to openly speak about it.

It could be that they were simply reading too much into it, and Harry simply didn't want to talk about it because there really wasn't anything to talk about, but this still didn't sit right with any of them.

Harry very clearly wasn't going to comment either way, so taking solace in that he knew the man wasn't going to carry through with the threat this particular time, since Harry genuinely wanted something from this deal, he read with trepidation.

"Because, you know, that's a normal reaction when an adult threatens to hit you," Sirius snarled.

Harry eyed him warily, but neither confirmed nor denied what he was really thinking. To him, this was a perfectly normal conversation, so he didn't understand why they were still so upset about this.

"That's a good start," Remus nodded seriously, "now how about we extend that blackmail to, stop threatening to kill me and I won't go to the police for child abuse."

Harry gave him an odd look, like this had never occurred to him, or he found the idea ludicrous. Still he remained silent, making them all jumpy and probably far more on edge then if Harry would even tell them what was really on his mind.

"I hate to be the one to point this out," Lily sighed, "but how do you know he wasn't lying?"

"I don't, I guess," Harry shrugged, "but I also know that he's afraid enough of me that he wouldn't really want to break a promise to a wizard." Even as he answered her though, he felt something was off about his mother's question. Was he wrong, and Vernon really did go back on his word? Why did he have a very bad feeling about his form not getting signed?

Sirius gave a weak smile, that had almost been funny, except that the act only emphasized how much of a temper this foul man had.

"Harry," James began, trying for a laughing tone of voice, though he mostly sounded depressed as he continued, "even Muggles get birthday cards, and normally show them off for that day at least."

Harry reminded him, "I wasn't supposed to be getting mail from my friends. Besides that, if I was going to this place for criminals, I don't think I'd make the kind of friends that get sent birthday cards."

Remus gave an unamused chuckle as he said, "well, at least you're getting into the part."

"Ouch," Lily winced, "she won't like that."

Harry nodded, unable to help but feel just as miserable now as he was then. He didn't need his memories to know this next week was going to be awful.

"Wish you could just slam the door in her face and be done with it," James grumbled under his breath.

"I can't believe how much I already hate her, and she's not even hear yet," Sirius growled.

Harry considered forewarning him of his feeling of dread, but they were already so upset he didn't think a warning would make things easier at this point.

Remus' voice went from underwhelmed, to desolate as he continued, knowing before he even got started this actually was going to be a whole new level of awful for everyone.

Lily had to bite her lip to stop herself from laughing, the boys had no such restrictions. She wanted to tell them off for laughing at another person for the way they looked, but really they already hated her so much and she hadn't said anything yet, she may as well let them get their kicks in now.

That at least put a damper on Sirius' mood, who now feared that his little Pup might actually be afraid of dogs because of this stupid little thing. He would personally set out and murder her this instant if that were true.

"I want to go back to that mental disorder they all seem to have," James sighed, "Sirius may be onto something."

"Thank you!" Sirius said with real conviction, actually distracting him from his murderous thoughts before.

While the people around him scowled, Harry smiled and told them, "I'm happier she did that then what she always does to Dudley."

"Okay," Lily nodded, "I agree with you on that front."

"Really?" James balked. "He gets paid just to hug her?"

"You couldn't give me enough money in the world to do that," Sirius added.

Remus made to say something to that, but Harry insisted, "I'm telling you, be glad for this attitude now. You're going to wish for it when she does get to me."

For some reason that didn't make any of them feel better.

"Ew," they all muttered. Even Lily and Remus, who considered themselves animal lovers, were rather put off at the idea of giving an animal tea like that.

Sirius thought about it for a moment, but then bypassed on a joke that no one wanted to share a drink with him. He considered it to much as sticking up for Marge.

Lily just sighed, unable to help but chalk this up to yet another thing that her and her sister didn't have in common. She had grown up begging her parents for any and every animal she saw on the street. How had they been, just so different?

Harry frowned in remembrance of this, finally forcing Sirius to blurt out, "you're not actually afraid of all dogs are you? Just this rotten thing?"

Harry didn't really understand why this question seemed so important to him, so he sugar coated his answer a bit by saying, "well, since the only dogs I've ever really been around are this one, and ah Fluffy," causing them all to wince at that reminder, "I'm not exactly fond of them. I don't run at the sight of them though if that's what you mean." Really he would rather not be around them if he could help it, but he didn't feel like adding that on. Then he did reconsider, "of course, there is Fang, and he's okay."

Sirius looked appeased enough, still personally offended these were the only dog's he'd ever been around, but wanting desperately to fix it wasn't going to change anything right now.

"No, he's off in Germany somewhere, actually enjoying himself," Remus snapped.

Harry couldn't help but wince, knowing they weren't exactly getting off to a good start if they were already going to get grumpy about these little comments.

Lily scoffed, and took a lot of willpower not to mimic Remus and give a witty reply back. She hadn't even been there and she knew damn well Harry hadn't said anything in an ungrateful tone. Even if he had though, no one could blame him.

"Damn near wish he had," James grumbled to himself, "he probably would have been treated better there."

Then James began snickering, admitting out loud to Harry that the two of them really had been saying the same thing, which made Harry smile again. Even if it was about the worst topic in the world, it still amused the pair that they really did seem at least something alike.

"Poor kid," Sirius said in real sympathy.

"It probably really did look like a smirk," Harry chuckled, "I wasn't exactly trying."

"So why hasn't he sent Dudley there yet?" Sirius demanded.

"Well, you've gotten better at lying anyways," Remus sighed, "the details make it."

"I'm going to smack you," Lily told him pleasantly.

"Great," James gave a ferocious grin that would have made any student in Hogwarts back up and duck for cover. "I think we can work something out."

Harry and Lily understood at once what had gone through his mind, if not the act itself then the meaning behind it. Which is why it didn't bother them in the slightest when Remus and Sirius had identical looks cross their faces.

"And what about that last one case then?" Lily demanded. "Since I doubt that's even a real figure, why am I even asking?" She finished with a hapless look at the ceiling.

"Polls show that fifty percent of all statistics are worthless," Sirius told her in a chipper voice, which actually made her laugh.

Remus was getting very sick of constantly wanting to shout insults at her every other sentence, and didn't begrudge James one bit when he did by saying, "see how you like it!"

Sirius looked to say something, but Harry quickly reminded, "It's not like it's really happening."

"It's the principle of the matter," he hissed, but kept it to himself all the same.

"Almost do wish he'd show up now," Remus sniffed, "give these jerks some payback."

"Aw Moony," Sirius pouted, "that would spoil my fun though."

"Not to kill," James backed up Remus, knowing he personally still didn't want a prisoner around his boy if he could help it, but playing along for the joke. "Just spook them a bit."

Sirius mulled this over for a moment before nodding and saying, "I'm okay with this."

"Oh, well since you're okay with it," Lily snorted.

Harry kept on smiling at their joking around, and persisted in ignoring that odd little niggle that kept cropping up every time this prisoner was mentioned...

"Which is saying something to the extreme degrees of awful," James huffed.

"Why?" Remus groaned, looking close to being physically ill if he had to keep on going about what an awful child Harry 'was.'

"Because she's clearly one of those nutters who delights in torturing others," Sirius grumbled. Harry then gave him another odd look, though for a completely different reason then the last few times where a memory had tried to snap him up.

Sirius had said that with a little too much experience in his voice. Had he really gone through something much like this? Harry had heard a few cryptic comments now and then, but he wasn't sure if he was really understanding them right. Then again, who was he to ask, when he knew he wasn't exactly being one hundred percent honest about how the Dursleys really were with him.

"There is no comparison," Lily shot back, "because they're nothing alike!"

"Actually, I was pretty used to that," Harry shrugged.

The four of them felt vile all over again at just how common Harry seemed to find these types of acts.

"Couldn't have anything to do with the piss poor people he's had to deal with," Sirius growled, "which still turned him into a better human then you!"

"How was that working out for you?" Lily asked pitifully.

"Well, she didn't grow a pig's tail, so not as well as I'd like," Harry said, unable to stop himself from growing angry with the rest of them now. Harry liked to think of himself as an easy going person, but there were some thing's that would spike even his temper, and Marge constantly digging at him for three days straight by then was beginning to push a nerve.

Lily arched a dangerous brow for what that implied of her baby, a mild reaction to her husband.

James howled, his eyes flashing dangerously, "she did not just insult my wife like that!"

"Sorry Prongs," Remus growled, looking shamefaced he'd had to utter those words about both Lily and Harry, "but I can't say no."

Harry made absolutely no move to stop his father continuing like this for a moment, he was getting a really bad feeling that this was only the tip of the iceberg. Whatever he had been feeling before, he was now positive was an inkling of a memory. Something awful happened while Marge was there...though either to himself or the woman he had no clue.

"Thank you," James said, just a tiny bit breathless after having only cooled down from his yelling spree, "now do me a favour and blow her up as well."

Harry couldn't help but give his dad a wane smile, and began rubbing at his temple again. He'd been able to avoid this for a while now, but something his dad had just said was causing his mind to stir up again. Had he really blown something up? That probably didn't mean anything good.

"Thank Merlin for that," Sirius huffed, knowing he at least couldn't have sat there and taken another insult like that without blowing up something himself.

"When's the last time you made something explode?" Remus asked, trying vainly to get back to a lighter topic.

"Err, when I was seven." Harry recalled, wondering whether he should continue, but at the now expectant looks he decided it couldn't hurt, "I was on the playground and I was playing with one of the school balls, and Dudley and some of his friends came and took it away from me. I made the ball explode out of anger I guess."

This time they made sure to actually thank Harry for sharing that story, making him blush and shrug and mutter about how it wasn't that big of a deal. It was to them though, since they then realized that every other time they'd gotten Harry to talk about this, they had only ever criticized the Dursleys for their actions, and now realized Harry might have been taking that the wrong way.

"That's a good point," Lily winced, "they already think you were up to something last summer."

"Would accidental magic register then?" Harry asked glumly.

"Yes," Lily huffed, looking personally offended by this.

James was intrigued at once as he demanded, "know about this personally?"

Lily gave both him and Sirius the stank eye for a moment before admitting, "alright, yes, I got a few letters myself for some magic I did at home. I don't regret them now." She finished with a fair bit of venom. She looked so scary in that moment, none of them really had the gall to ask what had happened, so Remus read quickly.

"You get three warnings before they even submit you for a hearing," Lily told him bracingly, "even the Ministry recognizes that you're an emotional kid who can't always control yourself."

Harry nodded, looking rather relieved, though personally wondering why he was having another moment where this sentence felt all too forbidding to him. Had he really done so much accidental magic at some point he really did get in trouble? He didn't get too much time to think on it, for which he was grateful when the headache began its return.

"While I still would have preferred you curse her," Sirius rolled his eyes, "given the consequences, I guess that's that best we can ask for."

James and Remus nodded in agreement, while Lily gave Sirius a surprised look. That had been almost, mature. She really hadn't thought he could say anything so complacent, and immediately felt bad for realizing what she was thinking. Despite his childish nature, Sirius had already shown through taking care of baby Harry that he was more than willing to step up and act like an adult, if he had to and there was no other option. She decided to take this as a victory for now.

"You're mentally abnormal," James grumbled.

"Thank you," Remus sighed, he'd had a nasty feeling if he'd had to keep going he would have tried to chuck the book in the fire.

"That's just what she needs," Lily rolled her eyes, "because she's not loose enough with her tongue already."

Harry was tensing up, that feeling welling up inside of him like a balloon now. Something really awful was going to happen, his gut was absolutely positive of this.

"So, she's already drunk then," Remus surmised, "this ought to be loads of fun," he finished with dread all over him.

"Yes, that sounds like a perfectly miniscule amount," James snorted.

"Why?" Sirius begged the ceiling. "She's so wasted she wouldn't even know the difference, and it would make you all happier. Not that I really want that lot any kind of happy, but still!"

Harry shrugged, he really couldn't guess at Vernon's mind set by that point, Marge hadn't been the only one drinking that night.

"The way you gulped that down," Lily scoffed, "I wouldn't be too surprised if this was a weekend tradition."

"Proper sized now equals grotesque pigs," James snarked, making Sirius laugh.

Remus muttered something to Sirius again, making Sirius laugh all the harder.

That dried up the humour in the room faster than anything ever could. That's all they needed, was more commentary from this awful being. Remus reconsidered torching the book out of annoyance, then remembered he had promised not to, he'd have to come up with some alternative if it got too bad.

"I am personally insulted by that," James groaned, "and I wasn't even in the room."

"Did she just-" Lily began, her face beginning to flush red as she stuttered, "in-insinuate you were supp-supposed to be drowned?"

"Err, no," Harry began, not looking any more pleased than his mother at this crude little comment, "you know, just the runty puppy."

"Great," Sirius rolled his eyes, then tried for a joke just to make Lily's look like she was going to break something disappear, "now I'm personally offended." He frowned when he realized no one even seemed to have noticed.

"I don't think I can do this," Remus growled, and Harry was rather bothered to see he looked like he really meant it. His knuckles were nearly white as they clutched the book and his eyes were flashing as he continued, "just sit here and read about her insulting the two of you."

"I had to read about Harry being bit by a basilisk," James shot back, frowning in sympathy at his friend. "I know it's awful, but I really do want to hear what she says, it's going to make me killing her later all the more fun knowing exactly what she said."

Harry leaned slightly away from his Dad, now even more disturbed that his dad very clearly wasn't kidding, and no one was going to rebuke him for it.

Remus muttered a few more foul things before sucking in a deep breath and saying.

"Please," Lily sniffed, "if I was a bad egg, what does that make her, a broken rotting one?"

"A wastrel huh?" James asked, forcing himself to make a joke out of it for his friends' expense, since they looked like they were going to blow a vessel if they had to keep hearing this. "Haven't heard that one yet. Lily, how come you never called me that? I thought you'd called me everything under the sun at some point."

Lily fully understood what he was doing, so she released a giggle she didn't really feel and told him, "guess I just hadn't gotten to the W's yet, I'm sure it would have come up eventually. Now I'm just sorry she beat me to it."

Harry was finally able to take his mind off of those awful words, and released a half-hearted laugh at their light banter, giving Remus and Sirius a small moment to collect themselves as well.

"Poor kid," Sirius repeated, beginning to have a few flashbacks himself to a rather similar situation, "all that practice all week, and now you're having to hear the worst of it."

Harry nodded as he commiserated with him for a moment.

"Now that's saying something," Remus snarked.

"Was he expecting you to correct him or something?" Lily demanded. "It's not as if you knew."

All of the boys winced, Lily herself regretted the words as soon as they were out, since they sounded all the more harsh in the current mood of the room.

"While I technically am," James shrugged, not looking very bothered by the matter, "I'd much rather stay home for now and take care of you." He finished with a paternal look at Harry. "After you grew up a bit though, I don't know. I don't exactly have an age in mind, but I really would like to train to be an Auror."

"What's that?" Harry asked with great interest.

"Dark wizard catcher," James responded at once, his eyes lighting up with glee.

"It's sort of like our cops," Lily explained a bit further.

Harry nodded, looking very much like he wanted to continue asking about this, but knowing he couldn't exactly delay the book forever.

"Thank you," Remus sighed now eyeing the book as if it was Marge herself, "because if I had to keep going, it wasn't going to make much sense."

"You were already cutting your words off in odd places so you didn't shout," Sirius agreed.

"I'm not lazy," James frowned. "I'm the opposite of lazy. I've got all the energy in the world."

"That's the part you caught on?" Remus demanded, a smirk almost making its way again.

"What, I'm not really going to sit around and defend myself to someone who's not even here, plus I'd be wasting my breath anyways. I was just a little extra offended by the lazy comment. I honestly wondered if you hadn't added that."

"Not this time," Remus snorted, "but next time someone sits around insulting you, I just might."

Harry couldn't believe they were all taking this so calmly, but then he really looked and saw how white they all were. Tension was building so much that if this night really didn't come to a stop soon, someone really was going to do something drastic.

Which enraged them about that ridiculous lie all over again, but Remus hadn't wanted to look up and instead noticed Harry was finally going to do what he had been wanting to since Marge had arrived.

Sirius grinned viciously, very much hoping Harry would do quite a bit of shouting right back at this pompous family, see how they liked it.

Lily and James however exchanged very uneasy looks, knowing personally that if Harry's temper spiked too much, he really might blow up another glass or worse. They really couldn't handle him getting in trouble at the Ministry again for something that no human should blame him for.

"Please," Remus scoffed under his breath, "if they're decent, then I'm worse off than I thought."

"I like to think I have a right to be, the way they treat me," Harry smirked, his eyes lighting up with glee as he suddenly realized that moment he'd been feeling was coming to pass. While at the age of thirteen, he had been angrier then he had in his life, his family's joking little comments now had soothed him enough that he wasn't nearly as upset. He would still like to see Marge get her dues, but watching them at least attempt to shrug it off made him feel better.

"What's this?" Sirius asked, leaning over eagerly.

"Let me read and we'll find out," Remus said, shoving him back out of the way just as quickly and now reading with curious, if wary, glee.

"You're inflating her?" Lily asked faintly as if she'd never heard such a thing.

"He's inflating her!" James repeated, no longer even bothering to suppress his glee as a wide smile broke across his face.

Remus no longer sounded very intelligible, he was laughing too hard to keep going. Soon they were all roaring, the mental image of that obscene woman getting her dues in this manner just as good as anything else they would have liked to do to her.

James and Sirius sobered up last, still wiping tears of mirth from their eyes, to find Remus and Lily only remotely amused now. While they were all for this payback, it also stemmed back to their original fear that, Harry was going to get into trouble for this. Yes from the ministry, but even they weren't what was quickly growing from amusement to fear. Harry had just done some extreme magic, would the Dursleys retaliate? They had locked Harry away in a cupboard for years trying to suppress his magic, what would they do to him now that they realized the kind of things Harry could do?

It had taken a beat longer, because the other two boys really had been caught on the amusement of the situation, but eventually all five of them were now wondering these very questions, and not liking any of the answers they were coming up with. Harry was frowning back on his past actions, questions churning over in his mind and very weary of the answers he was providing himself.

Finally when the silence dragged on, Remus cleared his throat, and began reading again, no longer remotely entertained.

Despite the fact that he was still just as worried now about Harry as anyone else, Sirius still couldn't help a snort of mirth at that lovely description of such a vile person.

"Well, glad to see that dog's useful for something," James approved, the unease in his voice still apparent.

'Makes me almost grateful he might be able to lock and barricade himself in his room' Remus realized, though winced in pain since that was nowhere near a good long term solution to what could very quickly turn into something horrible.

"What?" Lily yelped in fear.

"Guess you could hide in there," James muttered, shifting about in unease, "none of them can actually fit after you."

"Still not a very good long term fix for this," Remus argued, his hands starting to shake a bit.

"I wasn't going to hide," Harry frowned, remembering vividly the hate that had been pounding through him in those moments; hiding had been the last thing on his mind.

Sirius opened his mouth then to ask exactly what he was planning, but Remus instead read aloud.

'He's making a run for it' they all realized at once. Then after a beat, they all smiled. It was almost impossible to believe, but this might just be the best outcome for this situation. It wasn't really going to be easy, where was Harry going to stay once he left since both of his friends were out of the country, but it was still a ten times better outcome than staying there when the Dursleys finally did realize who to blame for this.

Lily paled to almost a ghostly shade as the boys went the opposite and went bright red in anger. Threats were pounding on the tip of their tongue, but Harry said calmly, "don't start threatening before he actually does anything, I'm in no mood to put up with him in that moment."

That appeased them, just a bit, at least Remus was able to read without shouting.

"Yes!" Sirius cried, throwing his arms up as if he'd just found out he'd won the Quidditch cup. "I've been wanting to do that this whole bloody time. Oh please tell me you hexed him?"

Harry just gave him a benign smile, knowing he wasn't going to be able to confirm or deny that, Remus read.

"Chapter's over," Remus declared, a victorious smile still across his face as he passed it to Lily.

* * *

Found out I'm no Ron at Chess today, but at least I can say I've got how many people now reading and enjoying my story... well it made me feel better. Thanks for reading, reviewing, and enjoying. Also, sorry for all the cryptic remarks about what the Dursleys really do to Harry. Don't worry, I have an exact spot in the series when he does come out and tell them everything, but until then I like building up the tension to that. Speaking of...

*Ha! Okay, I am genuinely sorry, I know you all are dying to see the big freak out that Sirius is alive, but I just couldn't resist. Every time I've seen someone do the third book, they just automatically assume it's Sirius himself, when he does have more family that both isn't dead, as far as they know anyways, and would be more likely to be doing something to land on the Muggle news. As many of you know, what you've all been waiting for is in the next chapter, but I hope you liked this one enough in the meantime.


	3. THE KNIGHT BUS

A/N: Wow, I hardly had any author's notes in the last two, and so far I've had really stinking long one's in every chapter of this. I love it! I'm enjoying commenting back as much as you guys seem to be reading, so here we go Guest: (sucks in deep breath even though I'm typing.)

I'm glad you like the way I do Lily. I always pictured her more fun-loving than a lot of people seem to, she married James Potter for crying out loud, she has to have some sense of humour, but she's also fiercely overreacting in protecting people. Lots of you have noted that she does seem a little too forgiving of Snape in this series, and I promise that will start wearing off real soon in this book. She was big on it in the first book, mostly due to her instinct and flashbacks of how they treated him through their school years. He didn't have much to do in the second book, so there wasn't much time to show that she really was getting sick of how he treats Harry. Mostly when she berates the Marauders, it's more of a trying to rein them in type thing, rather than outright disapproving of them.

They don't know that the person who broke out was from Azkaban. It appeared on the Muggle news, and so their first instinct really was to think it was just a muggle who shared the name. Sirius doesn't keep track of his family; I think he states in the fifth book that he didn't even find out Regulus died until he got out of Azkaban. I certainly don't see him keeping up with him to know now. If you want other candidates, Bellatrix before she got married (and who doesn't go to prison until after the downfall of Voldemort), maybe his Dad since we know so little about him, etc. but again they were mostly joking and fixing a random name to someone they knew.

I am just as bad at math as JK, so my idiocy for not double checking dates was my fault. I will go back and fix it saying that this takes place during '80 the year Harry was actually born. The part about the Fidelius charm only lasting a week, is something I genuinely forgot but did go back and check and Fudge himself saying that the charm barely lasted a week, thank you for pointing that out, but it doesn't change my timeline of events that they go into hiding just before Harry's first birthday, but I suppose they didn't actually use the Fidelius Charm itself until the week before Halloween, why it wasn't used at once and that subsequent thing won't be touched in this particular story, or any of these books, because I've no idea honestly and the character's wouldn't either. I like Guest's idea though that Dumbledore was researching stuff about the Charm in the meantime while they were lying low.

I know in canon it says that all four past people who are present were full-time members of the Order, but I cannot see Remus or Lily just 'living' off of James and Sirius. So, since I can't decide yet what kind of 'work' any of them are doing for the Order, the only thing we really see them do in the book is guard the Prophecy, they're kind of on hold for the reading, and I might touch as I go on what they do more specifically if I come up with any good ideas. I know Remus specifically 'spies' on the werewolves on Voldemort's side, but I really can't see James and Sirius letting him do this too much, they'd throw a fit. James and Sirius together could kick up enough of a fuss he couldn't do it too often, while an after Azkaban Sirius probably isn't in any kind of good position and couldn't do as much to stop anyone from doing anything.

I'm afraid I'm still refusing to answer any and all actual question like the one Guest asked, that's as the story goes, and in the chapter below coincidentally. HAHA dang this is probably the longest A/N ever, and I'm sorry if it seemed a little rambly. It's probably a bad reflection on my writing that I couldn't just sit down and explain this in story...but oh well.

* * *

"Honestly Harry," Lily began, shaking her head from side to side, "I'm afraid to ask, but how come you've never ran away before then?"

Harry just sighed miserably as he answered, "the Dursleys ignored me more than anything else growing up. They never sat around insulting me like she was, that's why I lost my temper. I guess I'd just never been driven that far before."

"Best thing to happen, honestly," James nodded in total agreement, "mind you, I hate what led to that, but if you never go back, will be the happiest part of this."

"Where's he going to go though?" Remus asked in concern, stating the one thing that really could make this an awful situation very quickly. "Ron and Hermione are out of the country, and even if they weren't, would they really just let him move in like that?"

"I'm positive they'd let him live there," James scoffed, "the Weasleys let him stay most of last summer, right?"

"He could stay in the Leaky Cauldron," Sirius offered, "I ran away from home a few times and stayed there, always went back eventually but it was a good place to cool off for the weekend, especially when James did go out like this."

"But does Harry think to do that?" Remus prompted.

"Well let's find out," Lily shrugged, turning to her chapter.

"Completely understandable," James nodded.

Remus cut in, saying, "Harry, you do know now you really shouldn't be expelled for that. It was uncontrolled magic."

"Do they actually know the difference though?" Sirius asked, more puzzled than actually concerned. This crime really wasn't that bad, it certainly wasn't the worst he'd heard of. "Between wandless magic and, ah, wand magic."

"No," Lily frowned, "but once they come upon the situation, and hear Harry's side of it, there shouldn't be punishment. In fact, I'd like to think the Ministry will actually do something to get Harry out of there."

Harry remained quiet, ignoring that pull in his gut that said his Mom's words weren't ringing true. Out loud he responded to Remus' original question, "yeah, now. Back then, not so much."

"Actually kind of hoping for that here soon," James sighed, "now that Lily's said it, it seems obvious that the Ministry's going to come and see what happened and then take Harry somewhere else."

Sirius frowned, biting at his lip and trying not to argue. He personally had little to no faith in the Ministry, and he had a really bad feeling they might just try to brush this whole thing over and simply leave Harry there again once they'd fixed this situation. The after effects of which would plague him no matter what really did happen.

"You're starting to depress me," Lily sighed, an old now familiar pang back in place as she realized no one was really there for her boy in this moment when he needed them most.

"So, no one ever did tell you about the Gringotts exchange then," Remus pointed out something he'd noted back in the first book.

"Nope, no one had told me then, and even if they had I might not have anyway. Didn't want the Dursleys questioning why I suddenly had money on me." Harry reminded, frowning and suddenly wondering why he was getting a mounting feeling of apprehension. Alone on Magnolia Crescent, the night that he had been most desperate to leave the Dursleys...why did this feel so important to him. The longer he sat here, wondering if he was going to have to go on the run...did that remind him of someone.

Lily cut off his train of thought by reading.

"Oh please tell me you grabbed your broom," James frowned in concern.

"Yes, it was inside my trunk," Harry nodded. Remembering vividly back during the summer of his first year when he had been packing away all of his stuff and worried about how to carry his cauldron, when he realized that the trunk would magically expand to hold quite a bit of stuff, even if it was so heavy he could hardly lift it.

"Please stop saying that," Sirius huffed, "you're starting to depress me now."

"Can't help it," Lily pointed out as she continued with a bit of curiosity now, wondering what cockamamie plan Harry would consider doing before the Ministry got a hold of him.

"While it's not an awful plan," James snorted, "you're either ignorant or forgetting a very important detail."

"What's that?" Harry asked.

"The trace," Remus pointed out, "that allows the Ministry to find you until you turn seventeen. Plus, and no offense Harry, you really don't know enough magic that you could make it on your own anyways."

Harry nodded in understanding, not exactly up to arguing the point. While his thirteen-year-old self might have argued the matter, he also hadn't known about the trace back then and hadn't realized just how easy it would be for him to be found.

"That would be a story," Sirius agreed light-heartedly, "though personally we never exactly stuck around long enough for them to ask any questions."

"When did any of you get a run in with Muggle police?" Lily demanded suspiciously.

Sirius went a little shifty eyed and declined answering, while James laughed with far too much unease and said, "don't be silly Lily, he was joking."

Lily snorted, they weren't even trying to hide the fact that they were kidding, but she was too curious about the book to really interrogate them now. She'd wait until later.

"Well this can't be good," they all muttered at once. Harry already had an impressive track record when it came to getting into bad situations. And now, here he was, alone and feeling off again. One glance at Harry now showed they weren't wrong about being worried either; he had a frown already in place as he remembered exactly how he had been feeling at that time.

Lily already wanted to stop and bite at her lip in worry. Way too many horrible things could be lurking behind her boy. The boys were all thinking of their joking comments about a convict being around, and violently berating themselves as they realized their joking may have come true.

Lily's voice was heading into outright fear now, even if it was just a stray animal she didn't like that it was scaring her son.

Harry though, was frowning in remembrance. Wasn't he supposed to have a good feeling about this? That was his first reaction, but he knew his thirteen-year-old self had acted in fear at this startling sight. He wasn't even for sure what he had seen then...

The whole time Lily had been reading that, her voice had continued to edge higher in fear. Now as she recognized what must have happened, she only marginally relaxed. She was almost quaking in terror; the book almost slipped from her grasp. She still wasn't quite back to normal after that horrid dinner scene, and Harry coming so close to death right after that caused her to want to fling her arms around her son and hold him as close as she could.

"Thank Merlin," Sirius breathed, his eyes lighting up at once as he recognized the description, and then he released a bark of laughter and said, "you just called that by accident."

Harry was rubbing at his head and looking marginally embarrassed as they really did give a light chuckle at that, but his mind was still on the thing he'd seen. It was a dog, but massive. Why was this so important to him? It must just be a stray, so why should he care?

Lily was the only one who still looked on edge about the matter, Harry had never said what he'd seen in the dark, but now that the Knight Bus had appeared, surely everything was going to be okay now.

"Nice of him to notice," James said lightly.

"Just seemed like a fun thing to do obviously," Remus snorted.

"Wow, getting a bit snippy there Pup," Sirius laughed.

Harry suddenly jerked; he looked like he was on the verge of something really important. Back when they had told him about their decision to be Animagi, and the subsequent animals, he hadn't thought much on the matter. It did explain the random nicknames, and beyond that he'd never questioned it. Now...

Lily hadn't seemed to notice Harry wasn't paying much attention to them, she was still stuck on the fact it had yet to say what Harry had seen to startle him so badly. So for once she didn't take note of her son in the room now eyeing Sirius curiously, but instead read.

Now that finally struck a chord with everyone in the room. Sirius looked like he'd just been clubbed over the head. Harry was still eyeing him like he'd never seen him before, no that wasn't right. He was staring right at him like he was trying desperately to remember something...

"So, err," James began, looking from Harry to Sirius and back warily, "who wants to count the odds of this?" A guy named Black had been heard from on the news, and a giant black dog which happened to be Sirius' animagus form, had been seen around Harry.

They still didn't believe in coincidences, but none of them really knew what to make of this. Because if that was Sirius, then that meant that first of all he was still alive! That alone made their heads spin, because what force on Earth would keep him away from Harry for all of these years. Which brought up the most confusing part, had it really been him on the news? Was it Sirius who had escaped from a prison, meaning Azkaban itself? How would anyone even go about doing that? They had been kidding earlier in even suggesting it was a relative of his, since it was impossible to escape from that place. Was it simply two unrelated instances and they were just trying to over-read it?

Sirius looked likely to pass out, not finding this remotely funny anymore. The possibilities were endless and far too horrible. Lily and James were eyeing each other, unsure what to make of all this. The past few times they jumped to a conclusion, they weren't always right. Remus was beside himself; lost in questions he wasn't sure he wanted an answer to anymore.

Harry wasn't helping anyone, he hadn't spoken a word through all of this, simply sitting there watching Sirius. His mind and gut were at war with each other the longer this continued. He knew him, he had been so sure of that, and simply from the small amount of time he had known him now he was convinced Sirius was as close to him as his own parents. He should be happy at the very thought of Sirius being alive, his gut told him that. So why was something very dark and bad building up inside of his mind even as he sat there? A pounding headache was forming again, his body at war with itself, not knowing what to think or even what instinct to trust.

Finally after a very long, drawn out silence where no one offered anything, Lily finally convinced herself to just read on. Coincidence or not, she had a very nasty feeling they would find out sooner rather than later.

"Can't blame you for that," James muttered, not even slightly distracted from his best friend's odd mentioning, if it was even that at all.

Sirius finally came out of his torpor to release a surprised snort, shaking himself firmly like a wet dog. He was being paranoid, they all were. So why didn't he believe that? Well Harry eyeing him every other second now wasn't helping the matter. Out loud he said, "credit for trying anyways."

"At least it wasn't Ron's, you don't exactly resemble him," Lily agreed, trying in vain for some normal mood again, though none of the boys looked remotely up to it.

"Where would I even go underwater?" Harry asked loudly, not having meant to pitch his volume like that, but hoping to distract himself from the way his head seemed to be developing its own pulse.

"Err, guess you could go visit mermaids or something," Remus blurted, finally pulling him away from his thoughts.

James finally made a brave stab at humour again, saying, "Lily Flower, please never try and mimic that accent again. You're doing a horrible job."

Lily took a small moment to stick her tongue out at him, but didn't bother defending herself. It's not like she could skip what Stan was saying.

"Is he still driving that then?" Sirius asked, dully, and the others were slightly concerned to see that he hadn't really bounced back yet. Sirius was pretty well known for not letting things get to him for too long, so the fact that he was clearly still upset and distracted by all of these horrible implications about him wasn't boding well.

No one answered him, mostly because it was a rhetorical question anyways.

That finally earned a half-hearted chuckle from them, knowing all too well the sensations of riding that bus for the first time.

Harry closed his mouth sheepishly, finally distracted from his impending thoughts and was fixing to ask that himself. Lily smiled indulgently at him before reading.

"Well that didn't really explain it," Remus said lightly.

"It's okay," Harry said quickly, "magic makes it hard to see and hear, got it."

Well Harry hadn't stayed distracted long. He was already over his curiosity at this new magical object, and the brief feeling of wanting to object why this was okay but Mr. Weasley's car was illegal, and back to wondering why he felt like this should be the most important night of his life. He still had no answers though, and so he didn't want to delay the reading much.

Harry raised his brows in surprise, he did find that pretty amusing, but not enough to interrupt again.

"Well he's a polite one," Lily snorted.

That gained a weak laugh from the group, happy to have something to distract them and that delightful mental image worked fine.

"Wow, wait!" Remus said in surprise. "So the person who did escape, was a wizard?"

"But, how is that even possible?" James demanded. "No one should be able to escape from Azkaban, no one!"

Sirius looked almost mildly amused as he said, "well, props to them for being the first one to do it."

"Knock it off Sirius," Lily snapped, getting a little huffy at once at such a prospect, "it's not funny, this could be a problem."

"Quit fretting Lily," Sirius scoffed right back, "so it's weird, kind of freaky, and I'm going to insist still cool, but it's probably nothing to do with Harry."

Lily wasn't the only one who disagreed with that, Remus also had a bad feeling that trouble seemed to go out of its way to find Harry, and an escaped prisoner who shared a name with Sirius seemed almost likely by this point. Remus had met Sirius' family only once, and it had been far from a pleasant experience, one he would never wish on Harry.

James dearly wanted to side with Sirius, but he still didn't like the uneasy way his son was acting now, it didn't bode well.

Lily froze dead in her tracks as she looked down at the name, the first name, of this convict. Harry didn't even need to ask this time, one furtive look from his mom to his godfather and he knew his answer. James wasn't having it though, he tore the book away and glared down at that name like it was the worst trick in the world.

"Someone's dead," he snarled, his hands beginning to shake so hard the book was in danger of being broken all over again. "Whoever the hell framed you for whatever the bloody hell you ended up in there for, they are beyond dead!" He got to his feet and began pacing the length of the couch, continuing his violent mutterings about how his best friend had been set up for something.

Sirius said nothing, he looked almost mummified, and for a horrible moment Remus thought he'd stopped breathing. "Ah, Padfoot," Remus said gently, since James was still yelling at the top of his lungs and Lily and Harry were watching him wearily. Sirius was still losing colour, and were his lips tinged blue? Remus poked him, hard, in the ribs which only elicited the smallest of reactions that he sucked in air through his nose finally. He still wasn't reacting though, just gazing straight forward with a look of utmost horror on his face.

His friends had seen him in quite a few ways, so excited he couldn't hold still, so angry he couldn't spit out the words, and one single moment before this where he had been terrified. Then though, Sirius had done the opposite and had sat around talking almost nonstop in an effort to show how 'not afraid' he'd been. This shell-shocked display was something none of them had seen before, and it was beginning to scare them all.

"Sirius," James said loudly, finally having noticed he was the only one shouting. He waltzed over and placed his hand on his friend's shoulder.

The man jumped like he'd just been electrocuted; suddenly his eyes went flying around the room like he had no idea where he was. Blinking so fast there was no way he could really be clearing his vision, he stammered "s-sorry. Zoned out there, what was that?"

"You kind of went mental there for a moment," Remus told him kindly, trying to put some warmth into his voice that Sirius didn't even register.

"Di-did I?" he muttered, and then he shook himself like a wet dog with a rabid cat on its back. When he was done doing that, he looked around again with far more sense, and his eyes landed on Harry. Sirius swallowed hard, and opened his mouth as if to say something, but no words came out. What exactly he was trying to say, apologize for being absent, ask him if he knew what had happened, or anything else for that matter just wasn't getting past his lips.

Harry took pity on him and addressed both of those questions, "I'm not mad at you Sirius. I've only known you for a few days and I know you'd never do anything to get sent there." Harry very carefully avoided using the word of said prison; Sirius still looked likely to faint at any moment. "I still don't know what happened either, I just knew I remembered you. I'm not afraid of you though, and don't you think I'd be afraid of someone who I knew was a mass murderer?"

"Murderer?" Remus repeated eagerly, as Harry immediately dissolved into grimacing and rubbing at his temple as words slipped out that he had no knowledge of. Just this small little dig and he was already back to that horrid pain that sent white hot flashes through him.

Remus retracted at once, very much wanting to find out exactly what Sirius had been accused of, but unwilling to persist Harry in the matter. It was ridiculous after all, Sirius was a hot headed idiot on a good day, but he would never do something like murder. Or, well, maybe he would...

Harry cut in with another question instead, "but how did you know where I was? I didn't really think you'd ever been to the Dursleys?"

Sirius didn't really answer, he still looked like he was in a daze, and Lily answered, "the Order knows where Petunia lives, her address anyways. I've it listed under people who should be contacted if I die, which I need to fix," she added to herself with a mutter, ignoring the flinch that caused James for the suddenly very real threat. "It's how Dumbledore and McGonagall even knew where Petunia was living back in the first book. It was dangerous though," she finished with a sharp look at Sirius, "for him to still go there. Any fool who knew you would know you'd go and seek out Harry."

Still this gained no reaction from Sirius.

James was still grumbling mutinously as Lily finally convinced him to take his seat, the parents still eyeing Harry with some concern. Experience had already told them if he continued in this way, his body would rebel and he would end up crumpling to the ground in pain, so Lily was now very eager to keep going and read. James only shut himself up for now so that he could see what exactly was going on here.

Sirius convulsed slightly, hearing his name like that. He had been, well not content per say, but had accepted that he must have died shortly after James to have been absent so long. Now that he found out where he had been, he pondered whether he'd just as soon be dead. Then he grit his teeth and began mentally pummeling himself for that thought. He was alive, which meant that he really could get out and find Harry. It all came together very clearly in his mind now. Whatever he had been accused of doing didn't matter, how he had even gotten out didn't matter. That black dog Harry had seen, it must have been him! Which meant he would finally be able to do what he'd always swore he would, look after his godson. The why's and how's didn't even matter, so long as he could just do one simple thing and keep an eye out for him.

Lily released a very shaky breath, mixed feelings twisting inside of her as she realized she very well might just find out what had happened, and almost not wanting to find out. Whatever it was, this wasn't going to be pretty, but she pressed on anyway.

Some kind of life finally reappeared on Sirius again, but it wasn't the kind anyone wanted to see. He laughed, and it wasn't his usual jovial cheer, this already had an edge of madness tinging it as he leaned as far away from everyone as he possibly could.

Remus punched him on the shoulder, hard.

"Ouch," Sirius whined, and Remus sighed in relief to finally have gotten a normal response out of him. "What was that for?"

"Shut it," Remus snapped, "and quit acting like an idiot or I'll do it again."

"How does someone so scrawny hit so hard," Sirius muttered, slumping back down, and wondering if he could get away with listening to this on another continent.

Remus hadn't really meant to hit him that hard; he had actually been projecting his own annoyance at himself in that throw. How could he have thought something like that of his friend, even for a second? Yes, Sirius had made quite a few threats against members of his family, even Snape from time to time, but he'd never meant them! That accident when they were kids was just that, an accident. He'd forgiven Sirius for that a long time ago, so to even consider him to do something like that now felt like a betrayal.

"This is foul," James snarled, looking far more likely to rip someone's head off than Sirius himself in that moment, "how could anyone think you'd done this!"

They were all stumped. They of course knew Sirius quite well, but to the general populace he was simply a name attached to one of the pure-blood households. It really wasn't much of a stretch at all to think a Black would pull this off.

Lily wanted very much to sit around questioning how all of this had gone in trial, what kind of evidence had been used against Sirius in the matter, but since no one here actually knew the answer she didn't even touch on the question. She gave all of the boys a pitying look, but with James' almost comforting words still in mind she read out the full charge.

Sirius then balked and shuttered all over again, remembering Harry saying how non-human he had looked. He'd heard stories about how that place sucked the life out of you, but it was more unpleasant to picture yourself like that.

Remus jerked away from Sirius in surprise as he made a pitiful noise deep in his throat, and then bent towards him in concern all over again. "Sirius, I think you stopped breathing again."

"Sorry," he muttered, "just trying to picture it, and it's not much fun."

James was bouncing in place in his seat, still with that manic energy that he needed to go curse someone into oblivion for this slandering, and also dearly wanting to go sit next to Sirius now and hug the life back into him. They could hardly blame him for reacting like this, but it was still creeping them out how he had yet to regain any of his normal coloring and actually seemed to be getting paler the longer this went on.

"Bollocks," James hissed, "a big, rotten pile of steaming-"

"James," Lily sighed, "we're all mad at this, but I want to hear it anyways."

James' upper lip curled in a sneer, he didn't look like he was going to back down one bit, until Sirius finally gave an intelligible sentence again and said, "let it go James. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you find this so ridiculous, but I want to hear this too."

"Might help us figure out who really did do it," Remus added on quickly.

James huffed and crossed his arms, while Harry simply sat there nodding along with his Mom. He knew the answer to this. He had never been so sure of anything since he'd woken up here, and he dearly wanted to find out now because it felt majorly important to him. Like something bad had happened, simply because he hadn't known this information...

Lily couldn't read that sentence without snorting in disbelief, while the other four boys made choking noises of disgust at such a ridiculous accusation. "Where is he even getting that from? He didn't know you," Lily demanded of the book.

Sirius gave her a wan smile, pleased she seemed to find this as outrageous as anyone else. Sometimes he wondered how much she really did like him, considering how often she threatened, yelled and berated him. And now her snarky little joke from before actually seemed to have come true. Watching her now though, he no longer had a doubt in his mind.

"Well this should be fun," Remus noted absently, noticing Harry still didn't seem to realize he shouldn't be spouting that name without thinking about it.

"Still love that you do that so casually," Sirius said a little too loudly, obviously trying to force a devil may care attitude. The others didn't buy it, but it was a nice attempt.

"You forgot?" James laughed lightly, not anywhere near over his shock and anger that his best friend had survived, but enjoying Harry's unintentional humour all the same.

Sirius went so bug-eyed all of a sudden, Remus had to stop himself from reaching out and grabbing hold of him to make sure he really didn't fall over this time as Sirius nearly shouted, "oh bloody hell!"

"What?" James yelped in concern, Sirius was more than scaring him now with these awful freak out moments he kept having.

"This!" he snarled, and it finally looked like he was edging back to his normal self, except now he was truly pissed at something as he continued to nearly shout. "This is the first thing Harry hears about me! He's grown up not even knowing my name, and the first thing he ever hears about me is that I, I'm a-"

"Oh Sirius-" Lily muttered, while Remus really did look like he was fixing to hug him. Sirius was in no mood, he had built up enough steam that he was going to keep going until someone forcibly muted him.

"Don't any of you apologize! I've dealt with a lot of crap so far, but this!" He continued in this way for so long, he actually started to go hoarse, but none of them stopped him. They felt he more than deserved it.

When he finally did subside, now absentmindedly rubbing at his throat and looking far calmer and more himself, Harry was quick to cut in, "if it helps at all, I know you now."

Sirius grunted, though maybe he didn't verbally reply because his vocal cords were still coming back, but, after a quick look from James, Lily decided to keep reading now before Sirius got his voice back.

"The fact that anyone believes that is sad," Remus sighed. "I've heard of some pretty nasty Death Eaters, and even they don't have the gall to go around saying that, they'd be killed by Voldemort himself."

"Most likely this is all rumours that happened after Sirius was framed," Lily pointed out, "details were exaggerated; the worst of it always comes after the act itself."

"Glad you two think this is so interesting," James huffed, since Sirius' indignant look clearly said he was thinking that, but he was still rubbing his throat and couldn't say it.

Remus looked slightly offended for a moment that James thought he meant it, but then he backed down when he realized it was more of a really dark joke.

Lily didn't deign them with a comment at all; she just kept going and hoped for more actual evidence than slander.

"Ah, how would someone go about making that look like me?" Sirius said in mild concern, finally getting his voice back and seeming to lose it all at once.

"There are several ways," Lily frowned, "but my main issue is then what happened to you?"

Remus snapped his fingers and said, "what if the person who did this simply made themselves look like Sirius, then the Ministry came and got him after the fact."

"Wouldn't be the first time someone blamed him for something he didn't do, because of his name." James agreed, hardly looking pleased that they might have figured this out, since he still wanted to murder the fool who had thought they could frame his best friend and get away with it.

Harry was pondering how he felt about this. For some reason, it didn't feel right. There were huge chunks missing, and the set up his family had offered wasn't quite right, but as always he just wasn't sure how to best put those pieces together.

"Mad in the emotional sense," Sirius sniffed. "I like to think I'm a little saner than just standing around after something like that ouch-" he cried again, giving Remus the stank eye. "Why do you keep hitting me? You're supposed to be the nice one."

"You don't get to joke about this," Remus told him with one of the sternest looks anyone had ever seen. "Not this Sirius."

Sirius opened his mouth, a nasty little retort already in place, when he shut his mouth just as quickly and nodded his ascent. The joke had slipped out before he thought about it, same as most of his jokes really. Now though, looking at his friends, he recognized it was only going to make this worse.

Then to everyone's surprise, Lily spoke up, "don't be too hard on him, Remus. You know he plays off things to show how aloof he thinks he is. If making stupid jokes helps him to cope, don't beat him for it."

"My jokes aren't stupid," Sirius snapped at once, then he went bright-eyed and cooed, "aw, Lily, that's the first time you've ever defended me."

"Don't get used to it," she smirked at him.

James and Remus didn't really look happy, feeling they'd rather strangle someone who made light of this situation regarding their friend, but so long as Sirius was the one doing it they couldn't really say too much.

"Someone certainly deserves that place," James agreed, "but it's too good for what I owe them."

"That is still a very good question," Sirius nodded to himself, cocking his head to the side and actually considering the matter. "Or why I didn't do it earlier, like as soon as I got there. Why now?"

"I got nothing," Remus shrugged.

"Can we not think about this," James moaned, "I really don't want to think about this anymore than I have to."

Harry frowned, he had honestly wanted to hear if his family had any theories on the matter, but his Dad now looked as ghastly as Sirius had before. His anger seemed to be subsiding, and James was starting to push past his outrage at Sirius being there, to Sirius being there. Alone in that dark, creepy place where no one would normally survive more than a few years, and Sirius had been there for twelve!

The others recognized this as well, and Lily was quick to move on.

That released a startled laugh from Remus. They had just found out something major, life altering even. Nothing this bad or emotionally horrifying had come up since the first chapter of the first book, and here Harry was. Thirteen and caring nothing for his would be Uncle's state, but simply still worried about something as petty as accidental magic. It wasn't really funny, but it made him laugh anyways.

Sirius was dearly tempted to punch him then, more for payback than actually wanting him to stop, but he was already trailing off and Lily was still eager to keep going.

Sirius made to open his mouth again, but this time it was Lily who cut him off and said, "don't. I do not want to hear some stupid joke about that one."

Sirius huffed, she had just defended him and now was the one stopping him from saying 'he takes after me' but on retrospect, that really was a little too dark of humor even for him.

"Not even close," James shuddered in disgust, wanting to vomit all over again at Harry going anywhere near that place.

While it did keep things in perspective for Harry, Lily dearly hoped this was the last time that horrid prison would be mentioned, because now every time it was all three of her boys winced at the very thought of the place.

"What, it didn't have a lid?" Sirius asked absently.

"Not the best time to drink that anyway," James shrugged. Their light commentary still seemed to be lacking, and they were now beginning to wonder how long it would take before they could actually sit around and absorb this new information.

"Wow, you were on that thing all night," Lily said in surprise.

"You said the ministry would be tracking me," Harry frowned, "how come they wouldn't have caught up by then?"

"You would have been moving around too fast," Lily shrugged when it looked like none of the boys were, "so by the time you were pinpointed, the bus would have been off again. I'm sure they'll catch up to you before you leave Diagon Alley though."

Harry frowned, not looking remotely comforted by that. The horrid news of Sirius had distracted him now, but his thirteen-year-old self was still firmly upset by the matter with Marge, and even more so if he was going to be forced back to the Dursleys for the rest of the summer. He might have been the only one thinking about this though; the others were clearly still out of it.

"Could go see the country," Remus joked, "might be fun for a while anyways."

Lily just ignored him, knowing full well Harry wouldn't be able to get that far.

"Who do you think that is?" James asked, finally an actual distraction from the fate of his best friend.

"He knew Harry by name," Lily puzzled, noting just the first name and not his full name like some awestruck person might have, "you think they sent someone who knew Harry personally?"

"Well you tell us," Remus pointed out.

"Say what!" The ones without the book yelped.

"Surely the Minister himself wouldn't have come after you?" James said in surprise.

"Well why not?" Remus acknowledged once the shock had worn off. "He is the famous Harry Potter after all. He might have gotten some special attention for his bit of acting out."

"I keep wanting to forget that honestly," Lily sighed, "but I guess it does make sense."

"Sure he did," James scoffed, now frowning as he realized Sirius seemed to have gone quiet again. He was still obviously paying attention, but normally that would have been his line. James really hoped this chapter would be over soon, they needed a few moments to absorb this mess.

"That's starting to annoy me," Lily frowned, "where does he get the right to hold onto you like that. He doesn't think you're going to make a run from him does he?"

Harry just shrugged; he had no idea about the Minister's motives.

"Is he going to keep calling you that?" Remus asked, slightly amused.

"I'm okay with this," Harry smiled weakly, "it's better than being treated like famous Harry Potter."

"Glad you already knew that, or this would have been even more awkward," James nodded.

"It might have been a spot funny if you had though," Remus pointed out.

"Still glad he didn't," Lily frowned at him, "it's too odd to explain."

"Could have seen him in the papers or something couldn't he," James shrugged, still keeping an eye on Sirius who was still being far too quiet for his liking.

"Started to think what?" Harry asked with interest.

"I've no idea," Lily frowned, "perhaps that you were going to head out somewhere else and it would be harder for them to find you."

No one offered anything else, but they did wonder if Harry's name really was the only reason Fudge was there. What else could it be though?

"Still one of the best sentences I've heard all day," Remus muttered to Sirius, and then frowned when he only gave a weak grin back.

"Almost a pity," Lily sighed, "might teach her not to go spouting such crap to a child."

"I love you," James grinned at his wife, adoring that she had only beaten him by a second on saying that.

Which caused Remus to sniff in disdain. He, much like Lily and James, seemed to find it personally offensive when anyone compared themselves to Harry's family, only a few exceptions came to mind. It bothered him all the more when Sirius didn't even flinch at the sentence.

"No," James moaned, putting his face in his hands now.

"My sentiments exactly," Harry sighed, unable to think of anything else to say to that.

"Here I thought you'd finally gotten away from those..." Lily trailed off into a few foul mutterings before clearing her throat and reading.

"Like the pits of hell deep," Remus huffed, "where fondness equates to hatred."

"Poetic," Lily noted.

"And true," Harry agreed.

James made a funny choking noise like someone had just elbowed him in the throat. "Did you really just ask that? Harry, why on earth would you?"

"It didn't make sense," Harry shrugged, still finding this odd now as he explained, "every other time I'd done magic, I'd at least gotten a warning. Now, here I had done something really serious, and nothing."

Harry had used that word on purpose, he had been trying to elicit a reaction from Sirius like everyone else, but the man still seemed so out of it he wasn't going to bite. James and Remus exchanged very worried looks, wondering what had made him bounce back so hard when he'd been trying for a moment to come out of it, while Lily offered an explanation. "Perhaps because they went there themselves and saw what happened? No one could possibly blame you for your actions, the way they were treating you."

Harry didn't really agree, but he wasn't going to argue the point either.

"Are you trying to get yourself kicked out," Lily demanded of her son.

"I just wanted an explanation," Harry reminded.

"Well, they didn't know a house-elf had done that last summer," Lily reminded him, "and they say expelled as a severe warning. You still haven't done anything bad enough for that to be a real threat."

Harry nodded in acceptance.

While most of them simply put this down to Fudge being really bad at explaining the system to Harry, none of them noticed Sirius finally reacting again, by his eyes narrowing with suspicion.

"I think you're reading too much into it," Lily told him lightly, "it's really not that unusual for someone to have come after you. Maybe not the Minister himself, but still."

Harry still wanted to disagree with her on that, there was something he wasn't quite remembering that would prompt said Minister's motives, but he had no clue as to what.

"Who's he to tell you that," James scoffed, finally dragging his eyes away from Sirius to look at the book in annoyance. "it's none of his business where you go."

"I don't really blame him for this," Lily shrugged, "he is underage by all accounts, so it's not that weird for wanting to keep him in a smaller, magical community."

"Glad at least Harry questions it," James huffed, still rather annoyed by that.

Sirius narrowed his eyes further, taking note of that as much as Remus and James noticed him doing it. Was this really what was bothering Sirius so much, the Minister appearing? Sirius hated the Ministry, which had only increased, they were sure, because of what they had just found out, but this seemed a little odd for him to have such a dislike of someone who really hadn't done anything wrong yet.

Sirius declined telling them what was really on his mind. Which was that, like Harry, he was wondering if there wasn't something more going on right there, something to do with a supposed supporter of Voldemort suddenly breaking out.

Far from looking pleased, Sirius slumped back in his seat and grumbled something under his breath Remus didn't catch. He noted the act though, and he and James shared another look, hardly wanting to wait until the chapter was over anymore to get him to talk.

"Can Dementors be angry?" Lily asked, never having considered this. "I've never known them to hold an emotion really."

"They can certainly express themselves if they wish, just not the way you're thinking," Remus offered, realizing in that stretch of quiet he was expected to answer. He didn't look up to elaborating, which was odd enough for him, so Harry didn't ask what a Dementor was.

James smirked then, happy his son still had a way of distracting him from something like his best friend acting weirder as time went on. "You would ask something like this after the night you've had."

"I had to put up with all of that crap, and I still didn't get it signed," Harry shrugged, "it was worth a shot."

"He's got a point," Lily frowned, hating the way this was turning out for him. "I hate to admit it, but it really doesn't look like you're going to get to go this year. You'll have to try something else with those Muggles next summer." The taste those words left in her mouth made her wish she could bite her tongue off so she'd never have to hear that again.

"Too bad it doesn't work like that," James agreed absently.

Since they were watching for it this time, James and Remus noticed Sirius give an imperceptible nod at yet another action from the Minister. Remus, growing sick of trying to guess what Sirius normally would have said himself anyways, asked, "how much is there left Lily?"

She checked and told him, making them all feel a bit relieved, more than ready to take a break after this monster of emotional baggage had been dumped on them.

"How did she know to go there?" Lily asked in surprise. "I thought she went to Ron in Egypt?"

"I've no idea," Harry beamed, more than pleased anyways.

"No," Remus corrected himself from earlier, "that's the best sentence I've heard yet."

They all nodded in agreement with that.

"That's the end of the chapter," Lily declared, closing the book with a sharp snap of disgust.

Harry, who had noticed Sirius acting odd just as much as his Dad, decided he'd like to try and get a happier subject going.

"Err, so, about that police thing?" Harry asked hesitantly, since Sirius still looked a little vacant and Remus looked like he might not speak again for some time. James was shifting his weight around in so much unease he was practically bouncing in place, but decided to answer anyway. Yes Lily might get mad, but it was better than sitting around thinking about...

"Sirius and I were out doing some business for the Order when we realized we were being followed. We were on his bike, and so we hit the concrete since we were a lot bulkier in the air on it, and not ten seconds later we got the Muggles chasing after us, lights flashing. Still we gave them a chase around, hoping to lose both pursuers, when Sirius shouted back that he was going to pull over and for me to get ready. Of course I had no idea what that meant, but since he was steering I couldn't argue when he lead us into a dead end."

He glanced back over at his best friend, and while it was clear Sirius was listening, he still didn't look up to interrupting and stating his side of the story. More than concern was beginning to tighten up in James, that expression was really starting to scare him, but he finished off the story anyways. "So we were kind of cornered and being chased by two parties. The three Death Eaters who were chasing us above kept circling lower and lower, so we chatted up the cops until the Death Eaters finally lined themselves up and tried charging at us. We used the cop's cruiser as a wall, they crashed into it, and we bolted out of there before anyone recovered. Got the Ministry out there later to deal with the Memory charms and such. We didn't even get in trouble for the whole thing." He ended, sounding quite pleased with himself.*

He then turned to Lily, expecting a barrage of questions. It was clear from her expression she was annoyed she'd never heard of that before, and was going to demand to know exactly how old they had been, what they had been doing for the Order, etc. but she didn't. She remained just as quiet as everyone else. The silence dragged on into near uncomfortable levels until James finally took the book from Lily, checked his chapter, and then closed it and put it down, wondering what he could say.

* * *

Finally! The Big Reveal! Hope I did it justice guys.

*I recognize in reading that fun little thing you can find at( headsup. freeshell drumsticks/) that it states the boys are in their late teens, maybe just seventeen but that means Sirius got his bike well before I said, so I went back and changed that. Hope you enjoyed the short, and started crying when you realized there's really not going to be a prequel.

More A/N I know you guys are all sick of my words by now, but this is also something I need to address, a few people have pointed out that Snape heard the Prophecy and started this whole mess and Dumbledore immediately went to the Potter's and put them into hiding, but to that I say you really think his first thought was the Potter's? Dumbledore was running a war, and when this came to him, I like to think he had to actually look around even outside the Order to establish that only two current families fell under this threat, the Potters and the Longbottom's. Even after this, no due date is literally exact so he probably still would have waited until he was sure these two families were the ones. Even then, I still insist they wouldn't have immediately gone into hiding. If the Potter's had gone into hiding while they were still pregnant, then how on Earth did the rest of the world know Harry (and Neville) even existed if they were in hiding literally so much of the first year of their life. I don't think I'm making any sense...and I hope you all enjoyed the chapter you've been dying for so I'll stop talking/typing now.


	4. THE LEAKY CAULDRON

James didn't know where to begin, or what to say. What do you tell your best friend who just found out he would be sent to prison, a literal hell hole, for a crime no one would ever believe he committed. Of all the cruel, unjust things they'd seen in the future so far, this almost rivalled what happened to himself and Lily. He was almost afraid to keep going now, what other horrors would he learn?

Remus was the first to speak up after a very long, drawn out pause, as he said, "Ah, so, what's your deal with Fudge?"

Sirius shook his head from side to side as he sighed, "you're going to think I'm crazy."

"We already think that," Lily stated, giving him her best smile as she continued, "in the best way of course."

Sirius gave an unamused snort, but told them anyways. "Just thinking, I don't like that Fudge was the one to show up to make sure Harry was okay, not days after my supposed escape," here his face twisted off in that same fit of unease he now always felt at the mention of his fate. Quickly shaking that off he pressed on, "me, a supposed Voldemort supporter, according to the general populace. Now, who more than anyone would want to go after Harry?" He finished rhetorically, noting the light the rest of them gained at once.

"You think Fudge thinks you're after Harry?" James said, going a little cross eyed at his own question.

Sirius just shrugged, with his arms still crossed on his chest, glaring moodily down at the book. "Honestly, I'm with Harry, can't think of to many reasons the Minister himself would make an appearance, and be so relieved to find him alive, and be happy about him not going into Hogsmeade."

"I see your point," Remus nodded, "but why is it bothering you so much?" Sirius seemed to be taking this as offensive as if someone had just told him he was going to be a mass murderer.

"Excuse you?" Sirius spluttered. "How would you like it if I turned to you and said, hey, someday soon people are going to think you want Harry dead, let alone being the one to kill him."

Remus flinched back at all of the repressed venom Sirius was showing, but not angry one bit. He nodded in acceptance and apologized.

Sirius backed off at once, but he still looked a mixture of peeved, confused and hurt all the same. James exchanged a look with Lily, then said, "time to play musical chairs you two."

Harry, surprised, got to his feet and followed his mother over to the two seater couch Remus and Sirius had just vacated, placing Sirius in the middle of James and Remus. Harry thought he understood why once James leaned his weight imperceptibly into his best friends. Harry very dearly wanted to offer comfort as well, but recognized he could do no more than give false reassurances like his mother that everything was going to be okay. What Sirius needed now was both Remus keeping him in check, and James support.

It hardly fixed the main problem with him, but they really couldn't think of anything else to say on the matter. No one here could think of much else about how wronged Sirius had been, but there was no way to fix it until they found out exactly what happened. Sirius very dearly wanted the exact opposite of Harry finding these things out, but there wasn't much he could do to stop it. The very idea that Harry would be the one who found out what a horrible murderer he would apparently become made him want to burst into tears, it wasn't fair that he might finally have a chance in this future to get to know the baby he loved so much now, and it would be forever tainted with Harry possibly fearing and hating him.

Yet Harry insisted he must have met Sirius at some point, and he had no ill feelings towards him now, but was he trying to lie and sugar coat it? He didn't ask, unable to decide which answer would be worse.

Looking quite pleased with himself now that he could keep a better eye on Sirius, James took up the book and read.

"That would make any kid your age all kinds of happy," Lily agreed.

"I've sat around there a fair few times just to people watch," Remus agreed, wondering how on earth they could even keep going in such a normal tone after the bombshell that they'd received. He then reflected it wasn't any odder than the whole situation of reading a book about the future.

Lily was just pleased the whole place wasn't storming Harry again. She supposed he'd blend in better without Hagrid, and said gamekeeper shouting his name.

James grimaced almost as bad as if he'd had to say 'mudblood' again. If someone had told him at the start of this book Sirius would turn out to be alive, he would have skipped around dancing with joy no matter what the reason, now that he did have his reason he wanted to vomit and scream all over again at the unfairness of it all. He declined against saying this aloud though, worried it would make Sirius feel all the worse, considering how much he flinched at his own name as well as he continued.

Remus gave a weak, unamused chuckle, picturing some random person actually being afraid of a boy who had once cried all day because Remus had once accidentally turned his hair green, and it had taken a few seconds to correct the colour changing spell and put it right. Sirius had then given an exaggerated hurt expression all day about how Remus had 'shown how he really felt about sharing a house with him.' It was beyond ludicrous that a single person would really think so ill of one of his closest friends.

"Dang," James grinned, "now how come I never got that treatment."

"Because you would have eaten him out of house and home before the first hour was up," Lily replied at once.

"Well here's to self-control," Remus smirked.

"Don't be silly Harry," Lily chided, "you'd still have to take the class, you'd just have an easier time on your homework. Honestly, I wouldn't even be bothered if you'd bought something like that for school."

Then Harry told her the price, and she did a double take before nodding seriously and saying, "okay, good thing you didn't buy it then."

James voice immediately spiked with glee, this could only mean something good. Remus leaned in eagerly as well, and Sirius finally looked almost normal again. What better way to distract him from something so horrible then his favourite sport.

"Sweet," Sirius cried, almost bouncing in place as his eyes lit up like a child, "a new broom! I thought the new Nimbus sounded fantastic, this must be even better!"

"What are all the models anyways?" Harry asked. Yes he'd had an in depth discussion with Ron about this, but he was enjoying watching the three boys acting like their high-strung selves again, and actually wanted to delay the reading for a bit.

James looked ready to jump in and try to describe the brooms in high detail, when Lily butted in saying, "relevant information James," in a singsong voice.

James froze, and glanced over at her with a very hurt look on his face. "I find this very relevant!"

"Yes well I found the reason Astronomy is important to be very relevant," she snipped back.

James frowned, clearly struggling to remember when this had come up, then he offered, "okay, I get to tell Harry about this, then you can tell him about the importance of tracking stars."

Lily grinned and agreed, then James quickly launched into his explanation first. After a lively discussion of nearly every make and model, Lily almost regretted giving in to James, she found it so boring at one point she slipped out of the room to go in and check on baby Harry. James seemed to be winding down by the time she had reentered.

Once he was done, Sirius said in a suffering voice, "alright, so why are we forced to take Astronomy for five years?"

Lily replied with a bit of an impish smirk, "I would like to remind you all, in the very first chapter that 'odd' watch it mentioned Dumbledore owned. All of you knew how to read and understand that because you learned Astronomy."

"So we can read a fancy watch," James dismissed, "we do own analogue watches. We only use those more for traditional reasons now. Got anything else?"

"It's also very important in potion making," Lily continued as if James hadn't spoken. "It doesn't do a Potioner any good to have to sit around and take hours to figure out the position of the planets, which are important in many advanced potions. You need to be able to know and understand this in a very particular frame of time, so if you want a career in Potions you must keep up with Astronomy."

Harry nodded, very curious about this indeed, but it was clear the other three boys were getting rather bored with this conversation. Lily considered going on anyways, just for a bit of payback at James boring her stupid with his broom talk, but lamented that you really couldn't force knowledge, so she agreed to allow the reading to continue.

"Really?" Remus butted in eagerly. "They've gone up in the rankings."

"Just tell me what it is already," Sirius demanded, nearly bouncing in place in anticipation.

"It's a new model all together," James breathed, nearly drooling as he could only picture it, not having a previous model to go off of.

"Well read the sign already," Sirius all but begged, looking near to snatching the book away just to read it himself.

The boys spent just as long interrogating Harry on every detail he remembered of this broom, and Lily simply sat back and watched indulgently for a few minutes before cutting in again and trying to convince them to move on. James huffed and grumbled for a bit, but finally accepted.

Lily beamed with pride as she said, "I'm so proud of you. I can't imagine many boys your age, or older," she cut herself off to give an obvious look at the other three boys, "would take the time to consider that."

Harry blushed a bit at the praise, thanking his Mum. After a pause, the boys finally admitted they were happy Harry didn't buy the broom either, thinking in rational sense of course. It didn't stop them from wanting it any less either.

Sirius nodded like this made absolutely perfect sense to him, making Harry laugh anew.

"How come they don't have some kind of place in school to fix that," Harry asked, this having bothered him several times towards the end of the school year. "Honestly, how come they don't have any way to fix your clothes, I've ripped the hem of my trousers several times and just had to ignore it till summer." He was also thinking of a few other times, like the basilisk biting his arm and leaving a sizable gap in that sleeve as well for the last few weeks of school.

Sirius looked perfectly back to normal after the nice long Quidditch distraction and explained for Harry, "the house-elves have been known to take care of the worst of them, like for instance the time Peter got a hole ripped on his backside, long story," he added on when Harry looked about asking for details. "They also put some kind of charm, I think, on them when they go in the wash so that they don't need them every bloody time you have to deal with Herbology. Dirt repelling charms, and maybe they strengthen the material or something, I've never stopped to ask to be honest."*

Harry reflected that he'd never really thought about it, as the Gryffindor boys had a laundry chute that just seemed to magically clean their clothes and shoot them back out perfectly folded, but it did make sense.

"Well, at least you did get your stuff," James muttered, mostly to himself as he remembered worrying about this, and trying to push away the impending feeling that they would just have to rehash that same conversation at the beginning of next book since Harry would still have to go back there! He grit his teeth for a moment before forcing himself to go on in that same light tone as before, not willing to let his good mood be spoiled again so soon.

"Oh," they brightened in understanding at Hagrid sending Harry that book.

Remus stated, "guess that makes sense then, Hagrid would have sent you a textbook for one of your new classes."

"That's not what Kettleburn set us though," Sirius pointed out, "so why the change?"

"You don't think there's a new teacher?" Lily asked in concern, never having taken the class herself, but curious all the same.

"Wouldn't surprise me," James shrugged, "he would be how old now? With two limbs missing? In fact, you remember Hagrid's letter, he was going to tell Harry something, like a surprise? Guess this might have been it. Of course Hagrid would get chummy with a new Care of Magical Creatures teacher."

"Great, so we're going to have to deal with three new teachers this year," Sirius rolled his eyes, "I can only hope they're at least competent. Harry hasn't exactly had a good track record so far."

"You can say that again," Harry agreed, wondering why this year in particular made him feel like correcting Sirius on this. Had he finally gotten a decent teacher, at least for DADA?

Sirius released a surprised snort of laughter, picturing books fighting having never come to mind.

"Oh don't," Lily shuddered in true terror, "I don't want to have to deal with anymore of Hagrid's pets."

"Well I seemed to be wrong," Harry soothed.

"Well that was rude," Remus frowned.

"What's his problem," Sirius agreed huffily.

"What a jerk," James agreed with a frown. "Harry might not have needed that book even if he did already have it. Care of Magical creatures isn't mandatory for Hogwarts."

Lily winced in sympathy, but didn't bother to say anything out loud this time. He really had been presumptuous in his actions.

"Hope you'd at least get a discount on that book," Sirius laughed.

"Ah," Lily said in confusion, "I don't get it, they didn't use the counterspell to make the books visible or...?"

"Don't know," Harry shrugged, "didn't ask for details."

"Bird entrails?" James repeated in disgust.

"Well it sounds like an interesting class at least," Remus chuckled.

"Should he really be telling someone not to buy a book from him?" Sirius laughed.

"Well I appreciate it," Lily shrugged, noting Harry seemed to have a pessimistic side enough as is, he didn't need that extra help.

"I'm not that big," Sirius scoffed, growing uneasy all over again at any kind of mention of him, even his animal.

Harry gave him a pitying look, declining to mention that his own imagination might have made that black dog in the alley way bigger than it might have really been.

Now all four of them were frowning, each taking a worried glance at Harry. He was still frowning at Sirius, a perturbed look on his face. Finally Sirius couldn't take it anymore and said, "you're starting to scare me there Harry, what's on your mind."

Harry jolted slightly, Sirius didn't usually refer to him by his actual name, but he gave him a benign smile as he admitted, "guess I just didn't realize your animagus form was a death omen, and you know, not knowing then..."

Remus released a surprised snort of laughter, admitting, "yeah, it honestly did surprise us a bit too when he first achieved his transformation, Peter's a bit superstitious and actually called him a Grim."

James gave a surprised laugh himself, nodding and saying, "we were actually going to use that as his nickname, we kicked around a few things before we settled on what we've got."

"I can see how it would freak you out a bit," Lily nodded in agreement.

Sirius winced, and began ducking into himself, wanting to apologize for clearly frightening Harry so much, since by this point they really were convinced that must have been Sirius, the coincidence was just too high. Before he could let himself feel too much pity though, James absently gave him a nudge with his elbow, and Remus flicked his ear. Sirius was instantly distracted from his thoughts and instead was playfully grumbling about how his friends abused him.

"Now that I'll disagree with," James said lightly, still keeping a protective eye over Sirius to make sure he wasn't going to sink back into that self-pity again.

Harry nodded in understanding, trying to catch Sirius' eye to give him a confident smile, and succeeding after a moment; receiving one back almost instantly.

"Now there's a lost cause," Lily said absently.

They all laughed weakly then, but Sirius still wasn't in much of a mood to make the joke Lily had just mimicked a mirror of all things.

"Why?" Remus asked. "I thought you liked Neville?"

"Wait for it," Harry told him simply.

"Yeah, no one wants their friend around when they're getting told off," Sirius agreed.

James released a surprised burst of laughter, personally he would have been flattered, but he could see the other side to that coin.

"That is a little weird," Lily agreed, coking her head to the side slightly, "they said they were going to be there."

"Haven't you been sending them mail with Hedwig?" Remus asked. "Didn't they know they could find you at the Leaky Cauldron."

Harry shook his head no and said, "I didn't send Hedwig anymore that summer, it was to close to the end of the holidays, and I didn't know if she'd be back in time with an answer before I had to go back to school."

The others disagreed, wanting to point out that Hedwig would have known to go to Hogwarts even if that were the case, but didn't argue the point.

James read that with nothing but fondness colouring his tone, knowing full well that was something he would have done too.

"Finally," Remus grinned.

"I have missed hearing about them," James agreed affectionately.

"Then how did they know you were staying there?" Lily asked.

Harry shrugged and said, "I'm sure I ask him, since I was just wondering the same thing."

"Makes sense," Sirius shrugged, "he knew about you last summer to, you seem pretty popular in his department."

"I get the feeling everyone inside the Ministry always knows about me," Harry replied, not exactly happy about it.

"Oh yeah, she's never heard me speak, how'd she do an impression of me?" Sirius demanded.

James sniffed, choosing to ignore Sirius on that one, as he told Harry, "Go on, tell her the reason you did, and that stern voice will turn to outrage in a second."

Harry just shrugged without a response, having a good idea he didn't actually do that.

The four of them frowned at Harry sharply, not at all pleased this seemed to be the only explanation he was going to give his friends, but Harry was resolutely ignoring all eyes, and they admitted there was no sense badgering him about it now.

Now because of Sirius, they wondered if maybe they had taken too light of the situation before, but none of them said it out loud. Sirius was still looking all kinds of moody any time this subject came up, so James refused to linger on it too long.

"I like to think Ron wouldn't be put in that situation any more then Harry, or at least his Mum would have understood," Lily said, mostly to herself it seemed as the boys seemed to find that comment more amusing than anything.

"Excellent," Harry beamed, more than pleased to hear about this, he'd missed his friends terribly over that summer.

Then they all laughed a bit more as Harry blushed slightly at mimicking himself.

"His new wand," Remus grinned.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," James snorted as he read.

"Poor guy," Lily said in sympathy, wondering why the store hadn't simply found a better method of shutting those books closed with a belt like Harry, and simply selling them that way.

"How many classes is she taking?" Sirius asked faintly.

"Why's she taking Muggle studies?" Remus demanded. "She's a muggleborn?"

"How can she even take all of those classes?" James frowned. "Some of them run at the same time."

Harry didn't have an answer for any of this, but he asked something he'd been wondering for a while, "which classes did you guys take?"

"Arithmancy and Study of Ancient Runes," James and Lily said at once.

"We both took Care of Magical Creatures," Remus said, gesturing towards himself and Sirius, "but I took Ancient Runes to."

"Muggle Studies as my second option," Sirius responded, stretching out slightly as he forced himself to relax again at this rather normal conversation, might as well enjoy it while it lasted. "Oh and Peter took Arithmancy and Study of Ancient Runes with James," he added on thoughtfully, thinking Harry would like to know more about their other friend even if he hadn't met him yet.

Harry nodded happily, enjoying the fact he didn't seem to be getting that settling feeling that normally came with relearning things. This meant he'd never learned this about his family before, and he always enjoyed that. These glowing feelings managed to shove out some nasty little pang he suddenly felt at hearing Peter's name. That hadn't come up before this book, why this year in particular would he get a surgence for that name?

Sirius opened his mouth, but Remus quickly said, "yes Sirius, I mimicked Ron, let it go."

Sirius just smirked at him, enjoying the moment anyways.

"Props for that," Lily agreed, never having thought of that point of view before.

"Still wouldn't take the extra class," Remus said in disbelief, thinking this poor girl was going to overwork herself in the first week.

"That's a legitimate question," James said, his own amusement still lingering. He was picturing her come midterms and going to at least two professors to drop one of her extra classes just for a breath of fresh air, no one could keep up with that much!

Sirius snapped his fingers and said, "darn, guess she already realizes she's not going to have much time for free reading this term."

"Did she talk to her parents about that before though?" Lily asked in concern. "I asked my parents for an owl for years, but they never gave in to that one."

"I think a girl like Hermione, she most likely did," Remus pacified.

"And it's kind of recommended they get a new owl to," Sirius agreed, wincing in sympathy for the old bird.

"How old is he?" James asked in concern.

"Don't know," Harry shrugged, "Ron's never said specifically."

"Most only live for about five years I think," Lily said, frowning as she thought about it. "Ron said Scabbers used to be Percy's, and that was almost three years ago at this point. Assuming Percy got him very young, he'd still be getting on."

'Poor Ron' they all thought this time, not wanting the poor kid to have to go through the trauma of losing a pet.

"That sounds like all kinds of fun," Lily said in amusement.

"It's one of my favourite shops," Remus agreed.

"Surprised you didn't interrupt me every animal to say what it actually was," James told him.

"I'm not that bad," Remus scoffed, unwilling to admit he'd been mentally doing that anyways, though his friends knew better and exchanged superior smirks like they had when he'd given them an hour long chat about those color changing snails known as streelers.

"Bet he's still better than those," Sirius sniffed, feeling a particular affection for Scabbers, like he would for any rat that reminded him of Peter, and the description was a pretty good fit.

"Well she's just a lovely conversation," Lily frowned severely, that was hardly something you told a child asking for help with his pet.

"And some can live longer," Remus agreed a little hotly, still feeling bad for Ron and wanting to defend his pet, even if he wasn't there right now.

James chuckled, he'd actually been fixing to say something similar before he read Ron's response.

Lily jumped, James had yelled that pretty loud, then scowled at him when she realized he was still reading, "what was that for?"

"Ron said it," he shrugged, giving her a cheeky grin before reading curiously.

"A cat I presume," Remus said mildly, arching a brow in surprise, "though props to it for getting out of its cage."

Sirius popped him lightly, saying, "you really want that thing to eat Scabbers in front of Ron?"

Remus just rolled his eyes as James continued.

Which made everyone in the room laugh at Harry's attempt at humour.

"Really?" Lily demanded. "She bought the cat that attacked Ron's pet?"

"I'm trying to decide if that's her subtle way of saying Ron annoys her," Sirius smirked.

"Hermione's hardly subtle about anything," Remus snorted.

"I'm kind of with Lily," James frowned in disapproval, "it was almost rude of her to buy something that went out of its way to eat Scabbers like that."

Harry wasn't paying much attention to any of them, but was instead fighting the impulse to rub at his temple again. He'd never thought too much about Scabbers other than as Ron's pet, and he had no real feelings towards Hermione buying whatever cat she wanted, but there was something here he wasn't really seeing. Something important he really should remember about these two pets, James hadn't seemed to notice his son's silence as he continued.

Both Sirius and Remus released surprised snorts of laughter at that lovely description.

"That's a real mystery," Sirius rolled his eyes.

Lily huffed and gave him the stank eye. Despite her misgivings about Hermione buying that particular cat at that time, she had nothing against the actual animal. It was in its nature after all, and Sirius mocking it just annoyed her.

James frowned and grit his teeth for a moment, annoyed at once all the good mood seeping right out of the room at this near constant reminder. He wanted more than anything right now to find out what had really happened to his best friend, but the repeating commentary on him was grinding his gears.

Instead of allowing his mood to sink back down, Sirius said in a forced happy voice, "I think I should get some credit for that at least."

Remus gave him a pointed look that said quite clearly he still didn't find him making light of this situation any kind of funny, but no one told him off for it this time. It was better than him being depressed anyways.

Sirius opened, then quickly closed his mouth. He had been fixing to ask how much his head was worth, but decided he really didn't want to know the answer to that.

James voice spiked a bit in confusion upon reading that. What did this have to do with the Weasley's really? Why would it put extra strain on Arthur, or was it something else altogether? Most likely it was the second.

Sirius shuddered so hard at those words, he nearly shook the whole couch with him. Those guards were one of the reasons he felt like fainting at the mere thought of where he was fixing to spend the next twelve years of his life in a very short amount of time. He'd been around a Dementor once in his life, and the thought of forcibly being stuck in their presence for any prolonged time made him want to run for the hills without looking back.

James really couldn't take it this time, and wrapped an arm around his friends shoulder for a brief moment until Sirius did stop his shaking again. He waited until Sirius offered a weak, unreal smile, but at least he attempted it, giving James enough confidence to keep reading and pray for a change of subject.

Remus was trying to swallow back bile at seeing his usually energized friend reduced to this state, while Harry dearly wanted to ask who on earth these guards were if they elicited such strong reactions from people he could hardly imagine being afraid of anything. First Hagrid, now Sirius, what on earth happened in this Azkaban? He still didn't ask though, not wanting to be the one to linger on this.

"Just what I wanted to be reminded of right now," Sirius whispered, thinking about that horrid Chamber the least helpful thing to get his mind off of death and regrets.

James forced as much amusement as he could into this small interaction, perhaps speaking a little louder than was necessary to make sure Sirius got his fill of what he was sure was about to be an amusing moment. Anything with the twins and Percy in the same room almost always meant a laugh.

Then James grinned, looking all too smug at being right, and just as pleased to see a genuine smile come back to his friends face at these twin's antics.

The boys were outright laughing by this point, and Lily couldn't help but smirk along.

Lily shook her head affectionately while this only doubled the boy's amusement.

"Now that's not really fair to Ron," Lily frowned at him.

"I agree," James nodded. He enjoyed being Head Boy in his time, but Percy was being the wrong kind as far as he was concerned. In fact he'd rather enjoy it if Ron got that opportunity, he'd very much noticed the boy's lack of confidence in himself and some responsibility like this might just help him.

"That might be a little awkward," Remus noted, "only one of the twins getting that."

Sirius nodded, agreeing, "yeah, I'd almost feel bad for them."

"I resemble that comment," Remus smirked.

"I think you meant resent," Lily corrected him, knowing he had used the wrong word on purpose.

"That to," he laughed.

While no one else in the room took much notice of this, Harry suddenly looked puzzled. He had a rather distinct feeling Ginny wasn't nearly the sweetheart her mother wanted her to be.

"Rats," Sirius huffed, snapping his fingers in agitation.

Lily gave him the stank eye, even though she knew he didn't mean it anymore then George had.

"I'm getting hungry," Sirius said at once, his mouth watering at the thought of dessert.

"You're always hungry," James reminded him.

Lily ignored the pair, it was still a bit too early for lunch, so instead said, "that's a good question though, since they don't have the Anglia anymore."

"Well that was nice," Remus said, rather puzzled.

"Do the Ministry normally do this?" Harry asked at once, noting how confused the others seemed.

"They're not known to," James shrugged, "it's not their business to make sure every one of their workers gets around, but I suppose Arthur might have been able to make an exception for you," he finished, giving Harry an obvious wink. He didn't really find it funny, the reminder of his son's fame was only a thought away from how he'd gained it, but it made sense.

Harry nodded in understanding all the same.

Which gained a laugh from all present readers.

"I like the fact that means Arthur laughed as well," Remus grinned.

"Those twins had to get their sense of humour from somewhere," Sirius smirked.

"That boy needs to lighten up," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Good to note an obvious Weasley tell," James grinned, feeling rather smug he must have guessed right from this.

"That boy is annoying," Sirius rolled his eyes, "what brother points that out to his parents about his sibling?"

"That was a nice reaction," Remus rolled his eyes, thinking of a couple of worse things Ron could have done in retaliation.

"What's Percy's right to tell him that?" Lily demanded hotly. "It's his badge, not Ron's. Ron's not the type to take it for fun."

"Ouch," James winced in sympathy, wondering if this is why Arthur had looked so upset earlier. Were he and Molly having a fight?

That sparked an interest in all of them, wondering how the couple could be arguing about Harry of all people.

No one could blame Harry for that one bit, it was the normal reaction after all.

"Know what?" Remus asked with unease, not liking the look of this already.

James didn't bother with a response, hoping the book would explain more properly

This short little bit already had Lily worrying at her lip all over again, and the boys weren't looking any better. What worse thing could be going on right now?!

"Technically," Harry butted in, shifting his weight in agitation due to the mood circling around, "I've been in twice, Ron's only been in once."

"So Arthur was generalizing," Sirius huffed, his eyes narrowing, "that doesn't explain what they're so bothered about."

Harry winced at the sharp tone he used, though it clearly wasn't directed at him specifically.

James groaned and looked ready to toss the book away in anger. Why did he keep getting all the chapters that felt like mentioning how his son could die?

Sirius looked the opposite, ready to faint all over again as he vividly remembered how upset Fudge had seemed that night as well. He hardly wanted confirmation that his theory was right, but it seemed he was about to get it anyways.

James voice spiked all over again, having several testy retorts on his lips for that, but quickly bit them off. It's not like he could blame the Weasleys for thinking this, they didn't know any more about Sirius then Stan had. It just boiled his blood to know anyone thought that way of someone he considered a brother.

Sirius winced and pressed himself back into his seat cushions, wondering just how accurate that accusation was? Azkaban was known to drive people to death if they were there long enough, and his sentence more than met that time.

Remus was getting paler the longer this went on, clenching and unclenching himself up as he, like James, wanted very much to snap at someone for implying this about his friend.

"Is that right," Lily hissed, her eyes narrowing dangerously, "he's told you this, or is it more guess work and slandering?"

Sirius opened, then closed his mouth again. How he had broken out of Azkaban, he had not the slightest clue. The thought had never even occurred to him to figure out how, and he wasn't keen on sitting around pondering it now. However, he did have the fullest confidence that if any student wanted to sneak in and out of that school, he was more than qualified. Everyone here knew this though, and he just couldn't muster up the energy in that moment to say it with as much bragging rights as he normally would have.

Sirius winced at that nightmare of a sentence all over again, never mind that he himself had suggested it earlier. It hardly made him feel better he was obviously right this time.

James was resolutely ignoring him, wanting to laugh at how stupid that sentence was, and hoping for a clue what his friend really would be doing.

Remus wrinkled up his nose in disgust, having to force himself to cut off a mocking laugh at this. Personally, if Sirius really was 'after' Harry, then to him it wasn't even that surprising. Sirius first thought would be to go to his Godson, make absolutely sure he was okay. It wouldn't even surprise him to learn if Sirius did end up spending the rest of his time hiding around and dogging Harry, waiting for a chance to talk to him and try to explain himself.

"Not used to hearing you refer to me by my last name," Sirius said quickly, desperately casting his mind around to distract himself from this depressing topic, even for the shortest amount of time. "It's really weird. I keep thinking you're talking about my Dad or something."

"Half wish I was," James grumbled, turning the page so viciously he almost ripped it out.

James gagged slightly again, but refused to let himself be cut off this time.

Lily's brows shot into her hairline at that, what an odd thing for anyone to think.

"Well he's got that part right at least," Sirius whispered to himself, casting an almost longing look around this once peaceful scene, and one more towards the ceiling where the baby was. Certainly not in the way Arthur had meant it, but he was more than sure a piece of him died that night this family was torn away from him.

Sirius felt another terrible spasm rock him. If he was going to be hanging around Harry this year to try and talk to him, he'd probably be deterred by that!

"You're joking," Remus groaned, going a little green there for a moment.

"Sadly not," James almost growled, finding this to be a horrible idea the longer he thought about it.

"Surely he said no," Lily gasped, "letting those, things, around children!"

Harry couldn't help it anymore, this was such a vivid reaction from them he finally burst out, "who are these guards?"

The four of them exchanged uneasy looks, no one wanting to be the one to answer him.

Finally Remus swallowed back the bile in this throat to answer him. The whole time he talked, Harry was nodding and seemed to be settling down at the information like he always did, but there was something new going on this time. He seemed to be watching Remus with a steady kind of look.

Harry was trying his hardest to simply listen to the awful explanation, but he was having trouble fighting down a sense a Deja vu, like Remus had told him this before. That was ridiculous though, right?

Once he was done, James was quick to read on, wanting more than anything to stop talking about all of this.

Lily huffed and grumbled something under her breath, that they all heard and agreed with anyways.

James paled to the colour Sirius currently was, knowing he'd rather die than let his best friend be dragged back into living with those things.

Both James and Remus voice spiked as they started to protest that sentence, but Sirius was the one to cut them off, only being able to speak just loud enough to catch their attention. He was still having some problems breathing properly to speak to loudly as he said, "thanks guys, really I mean it. Come on though, you can't start yelling about this every time it comes up."

"You bet your arse I can," James snapped right back.

Sirius rolled his eyes indulgently, then took a moment to smile over at Harry. He looked just as frustrated as anyone else, but Sirius knew how the other boy was feeling about people yelling at something he'd rather just skip. It wasn't the same thing, not by a long shot, since Sirius found it more than relevant that they should know what happened at the Dursleys Harry wasn't talking about, but at least he could sympathize the feeling now.

Sirius forced a laugh, but he was the only one who attempted.

James scoffed deep in his throat, while Sirius sunk all the lower, unable to find anger this time. He'd thought it was bad before, but now he not only found out his horrible little theory was right, but Harry was still learning about him like this! It made him want to burst into tears and break someone's ribcage all at the same time.

This time Remus slung his arm across his friend's shoulder, and leaned in to whisper something in his ear. It didn't make him laugh like normal, but it brought up a weak smile none the less, erasing that look however temporarily.

James had to cut himself off every few minutes to mutter what nonsense this was, but he got through most of it intelligibly.

That finally released a bark like laugh from Sirius. It was far more subdued than normal, but he turned gleaming eyes on Harry anyways.

Harry was quick to return it with a smile and say, "probably because I knew deep down you couldn't hurt a butterfly if you wanted to."

"I almost resent that," he said in an attempt at a snooty tone of voice, "I can be plenty vicious when I want to."

"Couldn't hurt me then," Harry amended.

Which made them all beam with unrestrained pleasure. They could have sat around trying to convince Sirius all day about this, but in his mind it would have been more like false hope. He just couldn't shake the horrible image swirling around his brain that he'd gone crazy in that place, and could actually harm his little pup. Coming from Harry though, even his instincts rather than actual memory, made him want to get up and hug his little godson all over again that he was still so confident of this feeling no matter what he heard.

All five of them snorted in disgust again, never not finding that one of the most laughable and insulting things yet.

"I'm respectably afraid of the Headmaster," Sirius opinionated, though no one had asked him he felt obligated to answer anyways. "There's a difference!"

"Sure Padfoot," James said in a soothing voice, giving him a condescending pat on the head, making Sirius swat it away and call James something that made Lily snap, "Sirius!"

Harry and Remus were reduced to laughter again. It didn't fully erase the unease that this topic kept bringing up, but it did remind them all that they were still in the present time. This was not a bloody prophecy to come, they would fix this mess!

Sirius scoffed, this time his cocky nature made a full appearance. No damn dementors were going to stop him from seeing his pup.

Which made the four of them dissolve into renewed yet sad laughter all over again. To them, their world was still tipped upside down because of this constant reminder of such news, and yet Harry was still stuck on this one small thing in the grand scheme. It wasn't really funny, it still made them want to cry that Harry would never properly know Sirius as the Uncle he should have been, but in that moment it was better to laugh then cry.

"Not something I wanted to be reminded of," James pointed out, "no matter how impressive it is."

"Useless," Remus rolled his eyes, "is the wrong word for sure."

"Besides, I've no doubt you could take me down just by batting your eyes a certain way," Sirius grinned, smiling indulgently at the boy, "so maybe they should send you after me."

This time James popped him lightly on the back of his head, ignoring that stupid comment.

"Of that I'll make sure," Sirius whispered, mostly for James benefit who looked all the more annoyed now Harry himself was saying that type of stuff. At Sirius comment though, James relaxed like he never had before during this story. Hagrid, Dumbledore, and the Weasleys were a great source of protection for his son, but he did recognize in that moment the light in this dark subject. Sirius was free, and he would sooner give his own life then let anything happen to Harry. He prayed to Merlin it would never come to that sort of thing, that there would be a miracle sometime soon and the real cause for Sirius' imprisonment would be found and Sirius would be free to look after Harry as he always properly should have, and that was the most reassuring thing of all.

"That's the end of the chapter," James declared trying to pass the book along to Sirius, who didn't exactly look keen on reading.

* * *

* question submitted by RoyalRose161, if anybody has any other plot holes or just random questions you'd like to see me try and explain away, feel free to ask.


	5. THE DEMENTOR

This is more of replying to clh comments, so if you want to skip by this point I don't blame you, but here you go.

I'm inclined to believe that because JK said so herself, she's not very good at math and her statement of saying Charlies age in relevance to Percy's is loosely interpreted, so I worked it this way because of the inconsistencies in the book saying how and when and what exactly he did there. I'm not inclined to go back and change it, because I like putting in those random comments in trying to explain the book's mistakes.

I'm sorry you didn't like the parts I put in about Remus, but when you get to this book you'll see that I've got a very big thing about trying to explain a lot of things that aren't even touched on about his character, so I threw in that part about wanting him to be Harry's godfather but the government wouldn't allow it to give him some extra backstory the books never do. I don't think it's too farfetched that the prejudices against werewolf's would try and stop him from having anything to do with kids, and allowing one to be any kind of part of a kids life would be an easy thing to pass in the laws. I do recognize and admit Godfather doesn't equal guardianship, like I made it sound, but it doesn't change my point either that Remus was very forcibly tried to keep out of Harry's life by the Ministry. Yes I know James and Sirius are just that little bit closer and that's why he got picked in the end, but that was just my headcanon and I'm sorry you disagreed.

Despite how that might have read, I love clh and everyone's continued comments and critiquing of these little things I add, please feel free to open any kind of discussion and questions you like!

* * *

Sirius eyed his chapter with more weariness than almost any other before. He wasn't sure how much longer he could stand being talked about like this before he really did have some kind of breakdown, and avoiding the issue just didn't seem possible at this point. Still, it's not like he could avoid it, he'd rather break his arm then try to cut off the story here. He still wanted to know more than anything about Harry's life. So with a heavy heart he went to the correct chapter and read.

"Wow, Percy really needs to figure out which brother he's talking to," James shook his head in disbelief, "I still can't see Ron doing something like that."

"So, the twins didn't do that?" Lily asked in confusion.

"So who did?" Remus agreed, more than puzzled.

"Must have been Ginny," James said with a frown, "there's no one left."

"Well if she takes after those twins, I'll be more than happy to hear it," Sirius agreed.

Sirius grimaced, selfishly hoping that later never really came up as he didn't want to hear Harry trying to tell his friends there was a crazy person after him any more than he enjoyed hearing Molly and Arthur talk about it.

"I'm sure that cat loved this," Lily giggled.

"This could be rather complicated," James agreed with a frown, while Harry sighed as he realized his friends had something new to bicker about, as if they needed any more fuel. He had a very bad feeling this one in particular lasted for some time.

"I agree, it would have made sense for one of the parents to go with the group," Remus shrugged.

"Guess Percy counts as adult enough," James offered.

"A new record for the Weasleys it seems," Lily chuckled.

"Makes me kind of want to get a car," James grinned, "they seem useful, and I'd like to learn about that spell."

Lily furrowed her brow, not one hundred percent sure they really needed another motorized vehicle around here since she still was quite irked at Sirius' bike, and that car had been a disaster no matter the good end results. She didn't argue the point though, not just now anyways.

'He's not exactly being subtle' Sirius frowned, but didn't say that out loud, wondering if he was just being paranoid.

"I've never asked," Harry said, trying to take away Sirius' perturbed face, he might not have said anything out loud but they could all see it anyways. "How does the platform work?"

"What do you mean?" James asked, looking for specifics.

"How come Muggle's don't just wander into it, or notice us going in?"

"Oh," Lily said in understanding, "there's a muggle repelling charm on it, so they instinctively know not to go in or around the area."

"What about Muggle-borns parents?" Harry pressed.

"They can go in so long as they're lead by a wizard," Lily further explained.

Harry nodded, happy that this little detail had been put to rest. He also realized it must be the same for the Leaky Cauldron. His attempt had worked, Sirius was slightly distracted and looked just a little bit better again as he continued.

Harry gave a very happy smile of remembrance, thinking that was probably the first time Ginny had ever met his eyes and turned away for some other reason then blushing. That had been her first instance of finally showing she had a personality other than shy.

"Props to that girl for putting up with him," Sirius rolled his eyes.

"Be nice," Lily chided, she wasn't the biggest fan of Percy's attitude either, but they were seeing him from Harry's point of view. She was sure he must have a kinder side, at least around his girlfriend. She also had to stop herself from pointing out at least Sirius and James were just as pompous about certain things.

"Aw," Lily smiled while the boys rolled their eyes at this mother act in front of school students, all the boys but Harry. He was blinking in surprised shock and pleasure, since no one had ever done that for him before.

"Think you were right before James," Remus grinned, "the Weasleys might just up and adopt Harry if he asks."

"I can only hope," James laughed, which was tinged with sadness all the same that this had to be a happy thing at all.

"Wow, she remembered," Sirius grinned.

"Guess someone must have said something," Harry smirked.

"Where'd she make them at?" Lily asked ."Did Tom let her use the kitchen?"

"I guess," James shrugged, not really thinking too much about it.

"Now what's this?" Lily said in surprise.

"You think Arthur is going to tell?" James said curiously.

Sirius huffed and grumbled something under his breath, but none of them could think of anything to say to him that they hadn't already.

"Wow, not many people will admit too eavesdropping, " Remus said in a laugh.

"I did it so he technically still kept his promise to the Minister that Mr. Weasley didn't tell me," Harry shrugged.

"How exactly was he planning to tell you 'hey some crazy guy is coming to kill you'?" Sirius demanded in a snarky tone of voice.

Harry gave him an anxious look, but he couldn't really answer that since he'd never given Mr. Weasley the chance to explain.

Sirius looked up and around in surprise as he said, "okay, I know why you mean it now, but why didn't you then?"

Harry gave an easy shrug as he admitted, "sorry Sirius, but you didn't exactly scare me more than Voldemort did."

They all grimaced slightly at that, still rather happy Harry wasn't actually afraid for his life since it just wasn't possible Sirius could ever hurt him, but hating the idea all the same that there really was someone out there who did want Harry dead.

Sirius released a surprised snort of laughter and made to say something, but stopped quickly when James smacked him across the back of the head before he got a chance. Giving him a haughty look, he continued anyways this time, "not as serious as I could!"

"Where is your off button!" Remus demanded, while Sirius gave them all satisfied smirks and continued.

"Ouch, dang it guys," Sirius grumbled, he'd been smacked even before he'd finished the word that time.

"How many times can you make the same joke and still think it's funny?" Remus demanded.

"As often as I want," he shot right back, a superior smirk now in place. This was such a turn around to his depressed mood of late that no one really felt that mad at him anymore.

That had them all stumped for a moment, until James snapped his fingers and said, "you think Arthur thinks you know everything? That you might know Sirius was a friend of mine, and you would go looking for him because of that?"

"But I didn't now then," Harry pointed out, "and even if I had, that still wouldn't encourage me to go find him, when I thought he wanted me dead." He finished, giving an apologetic look to Sirius for saying that.

They all shrugged then, not really having any better reason why Arthur would think this.

Sirius grimaced all over again, hearing Harry say that twice in a row made him want to vomit, cry, and scream all over again, no matter how Harry felt now, him thinking this to be true at any point in time tore him to little pieces. He wouldn't let anyone try and console him this time though, blasting on.

"I notice you didn't actually promise him," Lily said in mild amusement.

Harry shrugged and said, "still don't understand why he wanted me to at all."

"Oh that was nice," Lily frowned.

"I don't blame him," Sirius rolled his eyes at her. "Who wants their sibling following them around."

"So now you've mimicked Ginny as well," James grinned over at his wife, "are you going to mimic everyone by the end?"

Lily decided to ignore them in hopes they would stop this annoying gag.

"I thought you already stored your stuff away in another one?" James reminded.

Harry gave a disgruntled look as he said, "yeah, but some first years had come in and taken it, so we'd grabbed our stuff and decided to move rather than force them out."

Harry suddenly went very pale and rocketed to his feet, shaking his head from side to side furiously. Lily reacted just as fast, clutching at his arm and demanding he calm down, or he was going to hurt himself. He relaxed, but didn't glance over at his mom at all, but instead focused on Remus like he never had before. His face scrunched up, and it was all too easy to picture the man before him with a little extra gray hair, sleeping in that compartment. So he had been right, he did know him!

The boys got up wearily as well, Harry reacting like this to something couldn't be good, and the way he was eyeing Remus set said man's intestines churning into themselves. Lily still had her hand on him, looking from him to Remus and back before finally demanding, "Harry, what's wrong?"

"I-" he began, before swallowing hard and still not answering, now rocking backwards on his heels in unease. There was no doubt in his mind, the man he suddenly remembered being in the compartment was standing in front of him, older yes but not nearly as dissimilar to Sirius' later unhealthy looks. He should say something now, because the bomb of a reaction to Sirius being alive was terrible for his family, so he should get it out of the way now, but the words wouldn't come out, jammed down his throat as he kept looking wistfully at Remus.

Sirius, still on his feet and wondering what on earth could be going through Harry right now, read to hopefully ease some of the stress.

James and Lily exchanged uneasy looks, James starting to walk over to the pair in case Harry was going to react to something soon. Harry had been reduced to rubbing furiously at his temple, trying to get a word in, but of course he couldn't say anything even though he knew with every fiber of his being he was right. Remus stayed rooted to the spot, mind going a mile a minute as he prayed he was misunderstanding why Harry was looking at him like that.

The book clattered to the floor and Sirius decked Remus so hard he fell with it.

Sirius was standing over him, shaking and pulling back as if fixing to swing again. James cursed wildly and flew towards him, tackling Sirius and all but dragging him away step by step while Remus stayed on the ground, hand pressed to his cheek in shock. Where to begin as his mind stayed on utter lockdown, unable to process too many things at once.

He kept hearing Sirius shouting, but the words didn't seem to be getting through, while Lily and Harry heard quite clearly as they moved to Remus side, eyeing Sirius like he truly had gone mad.

"-let me go! I'm going to kill him, that idiotic, manic depressive, self-loathing-" he tore into several other more colorful words for a few moments, while Lily got to her feet again and stood protectively in front of the pair, green eyes flashing as Sirius finally circled out and actually used proper words again, James still keeping such a tight hold on him it was a miracle he was still on his feet. "What the bloody hell is the matter with you, why weren't you there, huh? Where were you when all this mess was happening to Harry, oh I know, not there for him because you're more afraid of yourself then-"

"Sirius, you know damn well why Remus wouldn't be allowed near Harry while he was living with his Muggle relatives." Lily finally cut in, advancing a step towards him and jabbing him in the chest for emphasis.

He was still puffed up and looked ready to breathe fire at a moment's notice, but the shouting momentarily stopped as Lily's full words registered. There was a tick going on in one of his jaw muscles, but James took this small moment to continue dragging Sirius backwards, all the way into the kitchen and out of sight. Then Lily turned back to Harry still trying to coax Remus into saying something, while the man looked like he'd never speak again.

He'd landed on his arm, and had automatically sat up on it with his other hand pressed to the spot Sirius had slugged him, looking dazed and frozen. He'd known for a while Sirius was going to get over his shock and fear at what was going to happen to him and channel it into something more violent or at least something that involved a lot of his energy. He had not expected that to all be channeled at him, though in that moment he knew he deserved it and more; because Sirius was right. No matter the legal ramifications of his condition, why wasn't he there for Harry? He loved that boy like he would his own, and knew without a shadow of a doubt that if he had an inkling of what was going on while he was living with the Dursleys he wouldn't have joined Sirius in Azkaban, he'd probably be dead on sight for what he owed them.

His whole time he'd been at school, he always wondered if this happy feeling, the miracle he had in his friends, would end sooner or later. Hearing about what happened to his family now was physically tearing him apart inside, and he'd been wishing this whole time he had survived just so that he knew someone would still be out there looking after Harry. Now he'd found out he had survived, and shirked his duty, for what?

There was a light tapping on his forehead, and he finally blinked the static from his brain clouding him from truly registering his surroundings, to find Lily and Harry both watching him with more than concern on their features. Harry had been the one tapping him and trying to get his attention, while having a conversation Remus quickly understood as Lily was clearly explaining to Harry "-I meant that there are laws in place stopping Remus from doing certain things because he's a werewolf, for example he couldn't legally adopt you, but he's also not allowed within a certain radius of Muggle dwellings, or he really could be killed."

"But why?" Harry persisted, his brow ruffling up just like his father's did whenever he didn't understand something.

"All sorts of things dear, prejudices for one, they think he's some dangerous animal all the time and such. It's also to ward off temptations, after all not all werewolves are like him, some would purposefully seek out Muggle neighborhoods, so the laws a general sense that they have a right to kill one before they can do the act."

In the background he could still hear Sirius and James arguing in the kitchen, where James stood in this he wasn't sure he wanted to know since he was still considering slinking out the front door. Then Lily and Harry seemed to notice he'd come back down to earth, and Lily was quick to try and convince him otherwise of those actions. He said nothing, couldn't think of anything to say, as the guilt continued to eat him alive from the inside the longer he realized what Harry had been through all because he wasn't there. Damned those laws, he should have been able to write to Harry at least, set up something with Dumbledore so he could check on him, anything then what Sirius had implied what happened, which seemed likely by this point.

He hadn't ended up in jail, or otherwise physically stopped, he was clearly still alive and...why was he on the Hogwarts express? He blurted this question out before he had time to think on it himself, finally relieving Harry and his mother of the pent up stress they were clearly feeling. Harry was quick to say exactly what Sirius had just read, and stating, "I did recognize you, Professor Lupin, you were my favorite teacher that year."

Something twitched inside of him, a little niggle that he never would have believed he'd truly feel. Whenever Sirius and James had jokingly called him that in the past, he'd brushed them off and snap at them to quit it because they all knew he'd never actually get that profession, what school could ever allow such a thing, except perhaps the very school he'd attended in his youth.

Now, here Harry was, calling him that very thing he would long for, in a completely serious tone of voice. No mocking, no jesting, he meant it with a respectful tone and a sincerity that spoke volumes of truth. This flashed through him so fast, he'd barely had time to register the happy warmth before James and Sirius came back out of the kitchen.

Sirius still looked rather peeved, which he had every right to according to Remus; since he knew full well his friend would feel wronged at himself being locked away and forcefully stopped when Remus himself hadn't exactly been tied down and prevented from their personal duty of looking after Harry. As Sirius marched towards him, he half considered apologizing to Sirius, knowing he'd trade places in less than a breath. Then he was stunned all over again as Sirius bent down and offered his hand to help him back up.

After hesitating a few more moments he took it, getting uneasily to his feet and then rocking back on his heels and pushing his hand through his hair, still at a loss for words. Sirius filled in the silence, while avoiding eye contact and saying, "I'm sorry I punched you, I know it's not really your fault and...what else was it?" He asked, trying to force a joking tone in his voice no one else felt as he turned back to James, who simply raised one brow at him and made a 'go on' gesture.

Sirius released a huffy breath and slightly turned back to him, still looking more above his head then anything and trying to continue, but Remus cut him off and instead said, "honestly, I was going to let you take another swing at me. I can't say what's been going on those past twelve years any more than you can, but I was wrong. What made me stay away, is inconsequential." He came very close to adding on, 'I won't let it happen now,' but stopped himself as he realized that, possibly whatever had happened the first time to set up these circumstances, he may not ever really be able to prevent.

Sirius hesitated, but nodded and seemed to take this as some sort of apology, because most of his hostility drained out of him and he went back over to pick up the book. James hesitated and followed him, making Remus hesitate and ponder if James really was feeling just like Sirius, and just couldn't think of anything to add on. Lily and Harry exchanged uneasy looks, neither of them used to any kind of fight between these three, but when Remus finally decided to go back over and sit next to Sirius, who gave no protest, the other two wandered back to their spot as well.

There was a very sticky silence for a long time, Sirius rummaging for his page being the only noise, and once he found it he began again with a bit more anger in his voice then was normal, but no one said anything. Remus gave a very dark mental laugh, thinking that at least this got Sirius to stop thinking about his problem. *

Lily frowned over at these boys, personally annoyed and affronted for Remus at them. She had a very good idea why he hadn't been allowed to go see Harry, and if they didn't cool it with the attitude soon she would shove it in their faces why.

"Or Care of Magical Creatures, since we've already established there's an opening for that job as well," Lily offered, watching them all carefully. No one said anything for or against this idea, in fact she was a little more concerned Remus didn't seem stoked at the idea of this happening. He loved teaching people, had always had a special fondness for younger students at school and was well known for being the most approachable of the Marauders little gang. Secretive, a little odd yes, Lily hadn't even figured out that Remus was a werewolf until her and James were engaged. So she had not the slightest problem with this, and would gladly curse anyone who said otherwise.

Remus gave a wane smile, this wasn't the first time he'd heard this. He'd always been rather small and underdeveloped because of his condition, and Ron wasn't the first person to think he didn't have a source to his wand. It had led to a few instances of teasing and one memorable instance where he had proved a crowded corridor just how stupid it was to underestimate him.

Sirius frowned, not at all pleased to be right back on this subject.

James had to force down a strangled laugh as he realized all over again how odd this wasn't for Harry. Twice now, two of his old friends had made an appearance in his life, someone Harry should have rightfully known since he was born, and Harry had not a care in the world for either of them. Then James frowned further, suddenly wondering at the coincidence of this. What on earth were the odds Remus would wind up at Hogwarts, on the same year Sirius had made his grand escape? Was it possible Dumbledore had sought out Remus for this very reason, like he thought one friend would know the other's mind set well enough that Remus would perhaps try to stop Sirius. The longer he thought on this, it actually brought up a whole new round of questions, like where was Remus when that big blowdown happened that wound up Sirius in jail. Did Remus really think he'd done it? That was ridiculous, right? He had defended him now, so what could change in the coming year that would stop Remus fighting tooth and nail to keep Sirius out of there. To be fair, even if he had tried to give credence to Sirius, not many people would have believed him anyways.

Sirius hadn't let himself stay on the matter long, and James was in no mood to bring up any of this, so the reading continued.

That finally released a pitiful chuckle from all of them, even at the new tension, they all still found this stupidly funny in the context Hermione meant.

"If that ain't the truth," Lily grumbled, having noticed that pattern a while ago.

'Oh thank you Ron,' Sirius mentally grumbled, though still kept that one to himself.

Sirius shuddered all over again, he had known at the start of this chapter he couldn't exactly gloss over this, but after the bombshell of realizing Remus was still alive, it almost had less of an impact on him. Almost. His anger at Remus abandoning Harry almost made reading about what was to become of himself semi-bearable. It also brought up the fun question of what on earth happened to Peter. Since their original theory of them all being dead turned out to not be true, exactly how untrue was it? Was Peter somewhere out there as well? Sirius decided right then he would kill him if so. Remus had the vaguest of reasons, Sirius would give him that even if he was convinced there were ways to get around them that Remus should have thought up, but Peter didn't have any reason to abandon Harry.

Sirius couldn't help but let his voice peak with interest, finally bleeding out that angry tone, making Lily finally relax.

"What do you suppose?" James asked mildly, deciding for now to at least try to act like this was as normal as before, though the feeling was getting harder and harder to force as they went.

"Maybe Remus was faking being asleep?" Sirius smirked, attempting to do the same thing as James and not let himself grit out his friend's name.

"It wouldn't be the first time he's pulled that trick, he's fairly good at it," James agreed in forced light tones.

Remus didn't add his opinion on the matter, and Lily and Harry had no idea at all, which let Sirius go on.

"Like I said earlier, those things should be taken lightly, since they go off so easily," Remus said uneasily, which bothered Harry and Lily at once. He shouldn't be trying to stop himself from commenting any more than anyone else.

"Nah," James scoffed, a real smile finally lighting his features as he continued. "I've known him to sleep through the worst of rackets, and it also depends on just how close to a full moon that was."

Harry cocked his head to the side in remembrance, but he didn't exactly watch the lunar cycles very often, so he had no real idea.**

"Only the best shop ever," Sirius smirked, wanting to drool again at once as he reminisced about all of the candy in there.

"Those don't really work," Lily rolled her eyes, "the teachers know a student doesn't suck on feathers."

Sirius wasn't listening, he was too busy smacking his lips in appreciation at Ron's very good descriptions and continuing eagerly.

"Is that still running?" James asked in amusement.

Harry wanted to ask what he meant but Sirius, much like Ron, was rather bored at Hermione trying to put in historical type things into a conversation about sweets, so he was still continuing.

"Ask why," Lily murmured. "please ask why and kick up a real fuss on the matter."

"Dammit," Lily cursed rather loudly.

None of the boys had to ask why, but Sirius rounded on Harry and demanded, "didn't you ever tell Ron and Hermione, anything?"

"They must have noticed something," Remus agreed, finally pushing the last of the general unease from the room as the boys all found something to rally against again, "they did note back during your second year that you lost weight without being told. You never got anything for Christmas from them, even their cryptic little comments about how they 'hope the Muggles were treating you alright' back during the summer."

Harry hesitated a long time, choosing his words carefully as he said, "they, well we never exactly sat around and had it out like you all seem to want to, but I think they were suspicious. Sometimes, I'd just make these snarky little remarks or whatever, but no I don't think they ever really knew. I didn't tell them anyways."

"What about the cat flap then?" James huffed, more frustrated that Harry hadn't at least told his friends about that excuse for a home life.

"What about it?" Harry repeated curiously.

"Surely Ron, Fred, and George all saw it and wondered, or even questioned why they had to unlock you out of your room," Lily pointed out, clearly not appreciating Harry's attempts to be daft.

He just shrugged and admitted, "Ron asked me once, and I just told him we used to have a cat. I also told him all of the rooms were like that, cause they were paranoid about burglars. Didn't really feel like explaining it."

They all sat there gawking at him for a moment, but Harry kept himself tight lipped as ever and was looking pleadingly for Sirius to keep going. Why on earth was the boy still hiding something, even from his best friends? It was driving them all crazy, but they still weren't even sure how to ask him themselves, since whenever they tried he would just shrug and do exactly as he was doing now. They could hardly force him to tell them, it would do more harm than good. So Sirius, grumbling and unwillingly, decided to keep reading anyways.

"Now there's an idea," Sirius said, going bright eyed.

"Harry should know those anyways," James agreed, "it's practically his birthright."

Lily really couldn't come up with a reason to protest this, it's not like Harry was doing anything particularly bad, just wanting to go out and spend time with his friends in a village. The more she thought about it, the more she'd rather endorse the idea, it really would be good for her son to get out more on undangerous missions like visiting the village.

"So what?" Sirius rolled his eyes. "Can't really do too much to Harry in such a public place as Hogsmeade can I?"

"Sirius, I hate to remind you, but you do know what you were put in there for in the first place," Lily asked with a frown.

Sirius opened, then closed his mouth, before nodding and deciding to skip the argument that he really wasn't that stupid, it was a moot point in this future.

"He's got a point there," James said with a weak grin. "Sorry Padfoot, I really can't see you being able to do anything with Ron and Hermione there as well."

Sirius nodded in agreement, continuing with only the hint of a joke, "I can see them taking me down easy, I'm definitely no match for these three."

Harry smirked, but was honestly unable to decide just how much they were kidding.

"Thanks, cause I wasn't reminded of that enough already," Sirius huffed under his breath.

"Knew those two pets were going to be all kinds of fun," Remus murmured lightly.

"Don't what?" James frowned, rather on Ron's side for this particular argument. "Don't stop the cat from sitting on him? Don't yell at the cat for eyeballing his pet? Personally, I think Hermione needs to get a grip here."

Everyone else in the room nodded in complete agreement.

They all brightened, but for different reasons. Lily, James, and Sirius were all dying for Remus to really wake up and get some explaining going on. Maybe he even knew more about Sirius' case that he would bring up, aside from his general explanation of where he'd been.

Harry simply wanted to replenish memories of him, already in these few days he had a high respect for Remus, now he knew he'd get to talk to him for at least a year.

Remus, while still personally thinking he'd never give a good enough reason for his actions to be okay, was simply hoping he and Harry could have a normal conversation about anything, he could only imagine how his life had been without both James and Sirius around. They still had no idea where Peter was, so if he'd truly been on his own for twelve years, the very idea he'd get to interact with Harry would brighten his day.

"Okay," James and Sirius said together, "now I know he's faking it." The pair sounded so disgruntled about the fact, no one asked for details.

"Please say yes," Lily sighed, wanting to stop this delay to what she felt would be the most important conversation of this year to Harry.

'Ge thanks' Remus mentally rolled his eyes, though he said nothing out loud since he knew quite well how he looked to others, it was one of the things that made him so obviously what he was.

This time they couldn't help but lean forward eagerly, Remus couldn't possibly ignore this.

James and Sirius muttered something foul under their breath, knowing quite well that wasn't exactly enough to wake him up normally, but having a fairly good idea he was faking it and knowing he was just stalling now. Remus snored like crazy when he was asleep, and hardly so much as twitched which had been the giveaway from before, his mouth wouldn't have flopped open like that unless he was just going to start snoring louder. Yet Moony had faked sleep a few times in their youth to listen in on them sometimes, so they knew he could do it well enough to fool most people. James and Sirius weren't most people. Even only hearing a description of him, they knew they were right.

"Probably the only time I've ever disliked that woman," Sirius scowled over at Remus as he said that, no one needed to ask why as Remus sunk into the couch cushions a little more, rather upset himself.

James rolled his eyes, dearly wanting to point out to Ron what he had a good idea of, but resisted anyways for the sake of repeating himself.

Lily released a surprised snort of laughter, she remembered one time back during their first year where she had come into the common room and saw him passed out in an armchair and wondered the same thing.

"Well that's a relief," Sirius couldn't help but smirk, being able to picture that all too well.

"I think I should resent that," Remus remarked, smiling lightly over at Harry.

Harry was quick to return it, saying, "well, no person asleep is actually good company, so don't take it too personally."

James and Sirius couldn't help but laugh at that little exchange, it did help to relieve their mood a bit.

"Oh joy, cause this was just going so well before," James grumbled.

"His excuse for jokes have actually gotten more lame," Sirius said in disgust.

"I didn't think that was possible," James agreed with a grimace.

"Wish yours did," Sirius grumbled, then winced as he realized what he'd just said. He'd made joking death threats before, but now at the all too horrible realization he might have carried through with one of them, he didn't seem to find them quite as funny.

"Now that might have actually gotten his attention," Sirius nodded eagerly.

"Your worst nightmare," James grinned, suddenly lighting up in a whole new way. After finally accepting and adjusting to Remus being alive and getting his dream job, it truly sank in that this meant Remus was a teacher at Harry's school! Once Remus 'woke up' and realized who he was sitting seats away from, Harry would finally get what he'd deserved from the moment his parents had died. He was still ticked at whatever reasons had stopped this from happening before, but the point now was that Harry couldn't get into any trouble this year! Remus would never let anything like the last two years happen to Harry! This raised such a giddy mood in him, he actually laughed out loud, and was forced to explain this to the others.

Lily and Harry beamed, both clearly agreeing with James on the matter. Sirius sulked and didn't say anything, trying to decide if this made up for his previous absence. He'd withhold judgment for now.

"Or back him up," Sirius scoffed. "Honestly don't you ever let your friend have fun."

"Not this time," Harry remarked, "for the same reason I knew Malfoy should have backed off, no one's stupid enough to go at it when a teacher's around."

Remus shrugged, honestly agreeing with Harry, while James and Sirius grumbled they didn't really think Remus would have done anything against Harry and his friends.

"Good on ya," James nodded in approval.

"I'm more than sick of his crap as well," Sirius sniffed.

"Still can't decide if he's faking that or not," James smirked, knowing the answer really, but trying to get a rise out of him and giving Remus an obvious look who just shrugged. He had no idea.

Sirius played along and pondered it for a moment before saying, "I don't know, even he isn't so dense as to snooze right through a bunch of kids being that loud, but then why would he still be faking it?"

Lily honestly wondered if Remus wasn't perhaps faking it out of fear of meeting Harry. This was going to be the first time he'd seen him in years, it was going to be more than awkward for both of them, so she couldn't blame him one bit for stalling.

"That's not the problem," James shook his head, "it's the other noises I'm not buying."

Sirius frowned in concern now, his voice matching that expression. The Hogwarts express was one of the most magical objects he'd ever heard of, it hardly just broke down for any reason, and if Hermione said it was too early for it to be stopping, then what on earth could be going on.

Harry suddenly got a very hair raising feeling, something truly awful was fixing to happen, so he blurted out purely to delay it, "you know, I've never thought about it before, but how come school always starts on a Monday that's always September 2nd? That isn't really possible is it?"

"Its part of the Magic of Hogwarts, it kind of exists in its own little time pocket," Lily explained at once. They all noticed how Harry seemed to be slowly losing color, fidgeting and starting to rub at his temple, which were all horrible signs that something very awful was about to happen.

Harry asked for a bit more, still wanting to delay as long as he could, "so you mean the day of the weeks there really aren't the same as they should be."

"Not really," James agreed, "I asked Lily about this a few times, and she said she read it in a few books about how the magic bordering the school, keeping out anything but allowing students and teachers and such, that sustains that magic seems to make a skewed timeline. Apparently it registers the same, for example back during your second year when you got caught in the flying car, it was the same night to you as the rest of the world, but it wouldn't have been a Sunday night to them but a Tuesday...did I get that right dear?" He finished, giving her a cheeky little grin at Lily's indulgent smile.

"Mostly yes, you left out some details I'll forgive, I'm just impressed you remembered that at all." She returned affectionately, and Harry smiled to himself as he realized it had worked, however temporarily, and he was feeling almost at peace again.

Pressing further he asked, "but if the train is what causes that, how come Ron and I made it in the car?"

"You were following the train," Remus reminded, "in a magical object, so the magic the train gives off creating this effect would have affected that Anglia as well. It also would have registered you as two students, so if two adults had tried that same trick, they never would have been able to follow the train in that same manner, they would have had to been invited onto the grounds by Dumbledore, or at least another teacher."

Harry nodded in disappointment as he realized he was out of questions, but he'd done what he set out to do, the others looked far calmer as Sirius continued.

"Sirius, relax," Harry tried to sooth, all the while his tone said the exact opposite was appropriate. His memory was very forcibly trying to show him, or warn him, of some very bad impending things.

Sirius did hesitate for a moment longer to give Harry a reassuring smile, giving them all a brief reminder that Harry was clearly okay with whatever was about to happen physically anyways, his attitude was still scaring them almost as much as the book itself. Now as tense and jumpy as a cat Sirius read on.

"Not possible," Lily whimpered loud enough for all of them to hear, now clutching Harry's hand tightly in hers again just for that small reassurance. Harry had a very strong impulse, which he followed, to squeeze right back; instantly confusing him. What on earth could this memory have to do with wanting his mother?

Lily took the comfort from her son for a moment before properly explaining, "the Hogwarts Express is magically enchanted almost as much as the school itself, nothing could just make it brake."

"Then what's doing this?" James demanded of nothing.

"What?" James demanded, looking ready to reach forward and take the book away from Sirius.

He stopped him, swatting him away, while Remus was frowning and offered, "they must have been invited on, there is no other explanation."

"I've never heard of anything like this," Lily groaned, her hand tightening on Harry's all the more. "Who would be getting on? Why?"

"Guess Hogwarts wanted to take pity on some hitchhikers," Sirius grumbled without any humor at all, now rushing on for a real answer.

"Can't blame that kid one bit," James nodded.

That random comment released a surprised snort of mirth from Sirius, but it didn't last long enough for him to delay.

"Aw, that's so sweet she'd go looking for Ron," Lily murmured.

"I don't like all of these students moving around though," Remus frowned, bouncing around in agitation now, "it's still creepy that something's getting on, it would be safer if they stayed still in one place."

"You can't really blame them for seeking out friends and older siblings," Lily chided at once.

"No," he nodded, "just my personal advice."

They all lit up at once, having almost forgotten Remus was there in their new panic. After all it could hardly be anyone else, since Harry hadn't recognized the voice. James and Sirius at once took back any bad feelings they'd had, now knowing without a shadow of a doubt their friend could handle whatever was fixing to happen that had Harry so on edge in this room.

"Why would you use the Bluebell Fire instead of Lumos?" Harry randomly asked.

"I prefer that spell because quite a few things are afraid of fire, and it provides just as much light," he shrugged.

Sirius was near fainting by the end of this description. No one, not even Harry after Remus' thorough description of these monsters, needed to ask what had boarded the train, or even why.

"This is ridiculous!" Lily spat hotly, her green eyes shining with light as she continued, "those bloody things shouldn't be allowed anywhere near these children! Sirius can't even get on the train unless a staff member from Hogwarts invited him on, so what do they think they're doing?"

Harry quickly asked very loudly, watching Sirius with concern to make sure he really didn't faint, "what do you mean? Remus was on the train?" He also had a vague feeling another teacher was on the train with him at some point, but that was only the hint of something he knew better than to try remembering.

James, still torn between wanting to yell all over again in defense of his friend, or hug him, answered Harry, "like we said, the train's got all sorts of magic surrounding it allowing its entrance to Hogwarts, not just anyone can get on, only the students. Why do you think the parents never help load their kids' luggage. So unless," then he trailed off, going bright eyed himself and turning to Remus, now almost beaming as he finished, "unless someone did invite him on?"

Remus cocked his head to the side in wonder as he pondered this. He would like to think Sirius would have contacted him after he got out of prison, and it's not like Remus would think twice about helping him. Why wouldn't he help Sirius get to Hogwarts, since as of right now he honestly wouldn't put it past his friend to be trying to get into contact with Harry as well? Aloud he said, "I've no idea. If I did, then I would be regretting it then."

Sirius had to swallow very hard around a lump in his throat, but when no one offered anything more, he finally forced himself to read again.

"Sirius, do you want someone else to read?" Lily asked kindly.

James and Remus gave her grateful looks, they had been fixing to ask themselves, the only thing stopping them was his response, which he gave to their predictions.

He fired up and went from stuttering and shuddered disgust, he couldn't help but think of himself in the future being crammed inside with those things constantly whenever they were mentioned now, to outrage that Lily thought he needed to be pandered. He snapped, "don't patronize me Lily, I'm a big boy," and went on in more huffy tones.

Lily smiled grimly to herself, and Harry wasn't the only one who realized Lily had done this on purpose.

Then they frowned all over again, Sirius switching back to anxious and fear as he could think of several things that would be considered this poor kid's worst memories. Voldemort sticking out the back of some guys head for one, being poisoned by a giant snake, the worst part is he could go on! Then he glanced over and saw Harry leaning in to Lily, which he found rather odd. Harry had been pretty stoic through most of these misadventures, so what on earth could he be remembering that would make him want his mother's touch now?

Still half afraid, and now half curious, he read.

Harry was shuddering, extremely white and going almost clammy as he remembered that sound all too well. The sound of his mother's voice cut in, making him almost jump... it couldn't possibly have been her screaming was it? Her voice now wasn't nearly as high pitched as the memory...but were they the same? Then her words sank in, and he forced himself to remember where he was and what exactly was going on. Giving his head a firm shake he focused back in on this world as Lily said, "-you alright? Harry, please, what's the matter."

He pressed his hand to his forehead, pulling it away when he realized he was sweating, and murmured, "don't know. I've no idea what that could have been a memory of."

This was a lie, his mind knew full well what was being repressed, and he almost wondered if this wasn't one of those moments he might not want to get that particular memory back. His words didn't make anyone else feel any better either. What on earth could Harry have remembered that would involve someone screaming like that? Obviously nothing they had read about covered it, it wasn't from his childhood or he would remember it...then what?

The four of them were exchanging panicked looks, but Harry had no clue what to offer them this time for comfort. Swallowing back bile, Sirius wondered if Harry might come out of it having a better idea, and hopefully tell Remus then, so read uneasily.

'Thank goodness it's gone,' Lily groaned, hoping she wouldn't have to deal with those things ever again. They caused far too horrible reactions, now in two of her boys!

'What a lovely reunion,' Remus mentally grumbled, only imagining what he had been thinking of seeing Harry again in this future, and it being spoiled like this.

"Oh yeah, he's just peachy," James scowled, hating to hear about his son in such an awful condition.

They were all frowning for this poor kid, not even needing to guess that her worst memory was probably still plaguing her nightmares after last year.

"Why do you have that?" Sirius asked suspiciously.

"Is it so odd for him to have some food on him?" Harry asked, giving a weak laugh at what he thought was an overreaction.

James and Lily were both frowning though, James adding, "no, I agree with Sirius, bit of an odd coincidence that Remus happened to have something on him that makes people feel better after they run into a dementor."

"So, you think you did know about the dementors getting on the train?" Lily asked, still feeling rather odd asking anything in regards to Remus being present for this.

Remus threw his hands up in the air, looking rather agitated as he snapped, "how should I know?"

"Cool it Moony," Sirius grumbled, giving him a nudge in the ribs, "no one's blaming you but yourself. At least you got the thing out." Sirius knew exactly why Remus was on edge right then, he was most likely blaming himself for not acting faster and getting that Dementor out of the compartment before Harry had such a severe reaction.

Sirius' guess was exactly right, and Remus then gave Lily a sheepish smile and slumped back in his seat, still rather annoyed at his future self. He'd been in the room with Harry again for how long now, and he not only hadn't introduced himself to Harry properly, but he'd let that situation go on far too long. He should have used that charm the moment he had awoken, if the others' guess was right and he had been forewarned of Dementors would be on the train. It also answered his earlier question, that no he most certainly hadn't helped Sirius get on the train, the dementors would have found him no matter where he'd been hiding on it.

There was another long, drawn out silence after this horrible moment, and they were all wishing it would just stop soon. They hadn't even reached the school yet, and so far this was the worst book possible for all of them. Still, it's not like they had anything else to do about it, so Sirius forced himself to keep going.

"You don't realize how lucky you are," James said weakly, trying and failing for a joke, "Remus doesn't share food lightly."

Remus didn't raise to the bait, and Harry only gave a halfhearted grin at his father.

"What was that?" Sirius demanded, now scowling over at said man.

Remus shrugged and looked to the ceiling as he murmured, "that was me making a quick exit I presume."

"Leave it Sirius," James sighed, pressing his face into his hands as he finished, "I can hardly blame him for delaying that. It wasn't exactly a very nice time to get into such a topic with all of his friends around."

Remus looked a little better, making Lily and Harry chuckle to themselves that his actions being explained to him by James made him feel better. Sirius rolled his eyes, Remus had more impulse control then he did, since he was sure the moment he laid eyes on Harry he was going to try blurting out all kinds of things. He was positive if the Knight Bus hadn't interrupted, he probably would have already.

"That's a pretty sever reaction to something you can't even remember now," Lily whispered, still keeping a maternal eye on Harry.

He simply shrugged, feeling shame start to replace fear. Why did he have such a sever reaction, when clearly Ron was fine?

Remus grumbled something foul about himself under his breath, bordering along the lines of he still should have reacted faster mixed in with a few choice words, but Sirius was still ignoring him.

"That poor girl," James frowned in concern, "like she really needed to be reminded of her last year."

Harry was frowning in real concern, wanting to go back and hug the girl now and try to make sure she was okay, but he'd been a little preoccupied with his own reaction at the time.

Remus was quick to explain the different reactions people would have to dementor effects. It was all too clear on Harry's face now what he was feeling, and none of them wanted him to feel like that when it wasn't his fault how he reacted to this type of thing.

Harry nodded in understanding, very grateful to have this explained to him now rather than sitting on it, and finally understanding why he might have a sense a Deja` vu about Remus telling him this. He very well might have asked him later this school year.

"Your reaction wasn't that bad," Sirius said bracingly, taking pity on his pup and admitting something he was very not proud of. "My first time running into a dementor, I remembered back to when I'd been locked up with that dragon in Gringotts and I ran for it. Didn't think twice about it, course I felt just as ashamed as you after the fact."

Harry gave his godfather a full blown smile then, realizing what it took for Sirius to admit to this. He still thought passing out was still a far worse reaction than running, but he understood what he was trying to do all the same and appreciated it.

"Lesson number one, take his advice when it comes to dealing with creatures," James told Harry wisely.

"I'm sure I remember that," Harry smiled right back, more than pleased some of that horrible mood was finally leaking back out of the room. All five of them were almost eager to keep reading now, wondering when exactly Remus was going to pull Harry aside so they could talk, hopefully with a simple and understandable explanation of why it hadn't happened already.

Remus face twisted all over again with self-hatred and annoyance, Harry should have grown up knowing the answer to that dammit, but no one said anything about it this time.

Then they all felt a sinking feeling residing in them as they realized Remus hadn't exactly seized an opportunity quite yet. Then Lily said what they were all thinking, "I'm sure he just didn't want to risk being interrupted, the trains not exactly private after all. I wouldn't even be too surprised if he waits until tomorrow after all of your classes are over, and asks you to his office or something."

She said it with such confidence, it made the other boys feel better at once, but Harry was still frowning. Why wouldn't he believe his mother about this? Surely Remus did come talk to him, explain away what was bothering them all now...right?

"Glad he didn't lose him again," James smirked, remembering back to their first year and the mysterious missing Trevor, glad Neville seemed to have found a way to keep a better eye on his pet.

"Nah, you'll learn about those sometime in your sixth or seventh year," Remus shrugged.

"So, what are they?" Harry asked, feeling grumpy all over again at having to ask a question he should know.

This time Sirius explained, and Harry nodded as he remembered them mentioning these odd beasts earlier, but then asked, "so you can only see them when you've seen someone die?"

"Yep," Sirius agreed.

"Then how come Harry didn't see them after he technically saw Quirrell die?" James asked, now realizing this hadn't exactly come up at the end of the last two books when he would have taken the carriages back.

"Harry passed out before he actually saw Quirrell die," Lily reminded, "we didn't even know he was dead until Dumbledore told us."

"Oh yeah," he nodded.

Since Sirius had given Harry a pretty good description of the beasts, Harry let the matter go, but he was still wondering why he had a good idea he knew these beasts better.

"I really wish you had explained better what dementors were then," Sirius grumbled.

"So do I," Remus agreed, more than frustrated with himself...which was an odd feeling, being mad at something you hadn't technically done yet.

"Yes, because I'm so sure I'm just going to come waltzing through the front gates, please give me a little credit," Sirius huffed. James and Remus rolled their eyes, but Sirius had said that with an almost normal tone of voice, a first since finding out and referring to himself, so they let the comment slide.

"Who did Neville tell that would be mocking Harry like that?" Lily said in outrage.

Harry defended his friend at once, still grimacing in annoyance as his memory recognized all too well that tone of voice, but he knew Ron had asked/ snapped at Neville about this later so he explained, "Neville and Ginny had been talking about it in their own carriage when they had been getting in one, and Malfoy overheard. He didn't mean to start this."

Lily backed down, mollified at once, but Sirius was still rather annoyed enough his tone showed it as he read.

"Professor Lupin is the best," James said, then burst out cackling when he realized how much fun this could be.

Sirius was frowning at him though, slightly miffed as he said, "you couldn't have held off on that? I wanted Ron to punch him."

"So sorry my timing wasn't to your liking," Remus rolled his eyes at him.

"And I already hated this kid before," Sirius scowled down at the book now, "but if he really gives you crap I'm going to insist someone needs to knock his lights out."

"I think I can handle a third year picking on me Sirius," Remus smirked at him, still warmed all the same, and flashing back to a few times when Sirius had made that threat about any other kid who picked on him for his appearance.

"What did they do now?" James demanded of nothing, Merlin they'd just stepped foot in.

"Why Hermione?" Lily puzzled, long since used to Harry seeming to get more attention than any of them wanted, "and I agree, what on earth could this be about?"

"Well at least it wasn't Snape or Filch trying to blame them for something before school even started," Sirius grumbled.

"She has that effect on everybody," Remus smirked.

"A word about what though?" Harry asked, still a little on edge at that remembered look.

All of them shrugged, not having the faintest idea.

"Oh Remus, you didn't," Harry groaned, going bright red with remembered embarrassment.

Remus however was smiling, finally pleased with something he'd done in this future, as he explained to Harry, "oh I'm very sure I did. You shouldn't be embarrassed about what happened to you Harry, but I'd still feel much better if you were double checked by someone."

Harry grumbled to himself, not in any kind of agreement because of the fuss he knew this would cause, but it caused the others to continue smiling more broadly. Finally, here was something they had all been hoping for since the very first book, someone who really was there simply to look after their little Harry.

"She makes it sound like I do this on purpose," Harry fumed to himself.

"I'm not delicate," Harry said in outrage, causing Sirius to burst into unrestrained laughter.

He refused to explain why though, swallowing back more laughter as he read.

Causing the rest of them to snicker as well at Harry's mirrored response. Harry crossed his arms and grumbled about them picking on him.

"Oh he shouldn't be that bad," James rolled his eyes, "he's really had all the treatment that could be given."

"I swear teachers were never young," Sirius agreed in disgust, they never seemed to understand what their actions could do to a student's status.

"I think I should resent that comment now," Remus butted in, grinning from ear to ear at being able to say that.

Sirius appraised him for a moment, before amending, "okay, most teachers."

"DADA huh," James said in approval, "well I couldn't be happier, at least now Harry finally has a competent teacher!"

"Thank Merlin," Sirius agreed, nearly bouncing in place in excitement. "I'm almost happy to be able to hold off on all those insults I've been coming up with, and push them off for another year."

"I am equally delighted you both have so much faith in me, and offended you think something's going to happen to me at the end of this year Sirius," Remus smiled indulgently at the pair of them, continuing by addressing Sirius again. "what exactly do you think is going to happen? I like to think I might even be able to break that stupid rumor, I'm not superstitious."

"Oh I don't know," Sirius shrugged, not looking very concerned by the matter, "in fact, you've got my vote of confidence for doing just that."

"Well now I'm all settled then," he rolled his eyes indulgently, causing the others to continue laughing at the pairs exchange.

"McGonagall's probably telling her she can't actually take all of those classes," Lily remembered sadly.

"But she's already bought all of her textbooks," Sirius protested with a frown, "shouldn't they have done this before the year started, like last year?"

"Maybe they can come up with some sort of deal so that she can rearrange her schedule?" Harry offered, nodding to himself as he was pretty sure this answer felt right.

"Can't see how that would happen," James disagreed, "like we said, some of those happen at the same time."

"Well lookie there," Remus raised a brow in surprise, "looks like Harry was right."

"How though," Sirius insisted, "private lessons?"

Harry shrugged when he realized they were actually expecting him to answer, saying, "she didn't tell me, that was just me trying to guess."

They speculated a few more ideas, but when they finally realized they wouldn't really know until lessons started, and let the matter go for now.

"Hadn't thought of that," Lily nodded, "McGonagall wasn't the one to do the opening ceremony. Guess I would have thought that the first years would have just waited on her."

"Something else I've never seen before," James grinned.

"I still don't understand why this book keeps randomly explaining things we all know," Sirius rolled his eyes.

"Maybe it's to do with whatever spell was used to create these," Remus offered.

"Sadly, I can believe that," James said with a wince for his son. Looks like another first week that was going to consist of people gawking at his boy.

While the boys couldn't help but smile at this, they did tend to feel the same way around such a calming and powerful figure that was their headmaster, Lily felt a sinking feeling as she suddenly wondered if perhaps Harry might even be projecting a sense of parent on Dumbledore? It's not as if he had anyone else to connect to like this.

"Was trying to forget that honestly," Sirius grumbled.

"And now you know exactly why," James grumbled with distaste.

"Why?" Remus grinned. "You know he knows you have it."

"Just thought it was odd he pointed that thing in particular," Harry shrugged.

"Not as Sirius as I could I'm sure," said man smirked, ducking instinctively as both of his friends made to smack him.

He then quickly hurried on, still smirking.

"Consented," James smirked over at him, "like you didn't faint from happiness when he asked you to."

Remus shrugged though, not exactly arguing with James, but also rather weary all the same. He knew for a fact he could put the same measures in place as he had when he was younger, and make absolutely sure he never did harm a student, but he also had the lingering fear as he did when he was a child. If anyone, students or parents, found out what he was he had no doubts he'd be forcibly removed from the school. Now though, a new tightening was also beginning to happen in his throat as he realized the circumstances he'd been planted in. Not only would he be locked up in the Shrieking Shack without his friends, but he'd be having the ghost of his memories haunting him in that castle. He shook it off, gave a weak chuckle for James benefit, but Sirius still gave him a perturbed look before reading on anyways.

"Ouch," Lily winced in sympathy, but Remus quickly waved her off, saying, "I'm not heartbroken. You didn't hear them applauding Lockheart or Quirrell did you? Being a teacher is hardly a popularity contest."

"Please Remus, don't even bother comparing yourself to those two loons," Harry said, rolling his eyes in contempt. "I've known you for a few days and I don't need memories to know you'll be ten times better then them."

"That's what I was going to say," Sirius smirked, then pretended to pout as he continued, "though now I am slightly upset myself that I have to hold back on all those new insults I came up with for this position."

"My heart goes out for you," James snorted.

Remus couldn't help but wince, having a pretty good idea his finances over the years hadn't gotten any better, but he wouldn't let anyone pause to give him sympathy for it, nearly pushing the book against Sirius' nose to make him keep going.

"Oh Merlin yes," James crowed, pumping his fist in the air and bouncing around like he had a sudden sugar rush.

Sirius wasn't any better, he started laughing so hard the book nearly slipped from his grip, while Remus rolled his eyes indulgently at the pair and couldn't hide a smirk himself.

Lily gave scathing looks to all three of them, knowing quite well what had them hooting like morons, but Harry was giving them all puzzled looks so she explained to him, "they're being childish idiots dear. You know as well as I do that Severus wanted the DADA position, so they're lording it that Remus got the job instead."

"It's priceless," Sirius insisted, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes.

"It also means that Snape can't give Harry too much hell this year," James grinned, still squirming with happiness, "because if McGonagall doesn't stop him Remus will."

Remus bit at his lip, he didn't really know what his friends were expecting. It's not like he could sit in the back of the Potions class and tell off Snape for what he did to Harry. He also knew for a fact he was hardly going to dog him in the corridors to make sure Snape didn't unfairly punish him like he had in the past, he was also rather torn on if he did come along how much help he'd really be. Snape was a teacher just like him, and if Harry was doing something wrong, he would hardly want to let Harry get away with it, in fear of showing Harry favoritism. So he remained silent, still grinning slightly as Lily told them both to shut up. Sirius was still chuckling lightly as he read.

"I would hardly be his favorite person to see again," Remus nodded, "though I didn't exactly go out of my way to bug him like they did," he finished, gesturing at his friends.

Lily narrowed her eyes in annoyance, and James and Sirius took that as a sign not to add anything on. What they didn't know was that Lily was actually getting rather annoyed at her old friend this time. She still hated the way he treated Harry, but if he turned and started acting that way towards Remus as well, she really was going to lose her patience with his actions. Remus was hardly innocent in his friend's actions, but she would be the first to snap at him; he was being childish if he was still going to hold a grudge against him now. She hated what these four boys had done, but she had learned to forgive and forget their stupid actions, why on earth couldn't he?

"Oh yeah," James nodded in remembrance, "there's supposed to be a new Care of Magical Creatures teacher too" he leaned in eagerly to hear this one.

Sirius released a surprised snort of laughter, yeah he couldn't exactly blame him for that, though he was sorry to hear him go.

"Really?" Harry beamed.

"Absolutely," Sirius nodded, grinning right along.

"That's awesome," James nodded eagerly, "no one could do better then Hagrid at that."

"Does that mean they'd need a new gamekeeper though?" Remus asked, just as happy as the others, but still thinking more big picture.

Sirius looked down curiously.

"Wow," Lily laughed, "well I'm more then happy to hear that."

"So, for once, Harry will actually get a good education all year," James smirked.

"Just so long as Hagrid doesn't try and bring another dragon to class for a lesson," Sirius muttered, mostly to himself.

That released surprised and happy laughter from all of them, yes it did seem Hagrid's type now they thought about it.

"Aw," Lily cooed.

"Can't blame him one bit," Remus nodded in understanding. He more than anyone knew what it felt like to be something someone didn't particularly have much faith in, but had been given such a chance as this.

"Doesn't matter," Sirius said, though no one had asked him, he kept going anyways, "you don't have to be a fully qualified wizard to teach Magical Creatures."

"Wasn't that charge dropped anyways?" James asked.

"Yes, but I never asked why he didn't chose to go back to school," Harry shrugged.

"Aw," Lily squealed again.

Remus couldn't help but lean down and whisper something into Sirius' ear, causing him to laugh quite loudly, and Lily to shoot the pair poisonous looks, making Sirius quick to hurry on.

"Write them down on something?" Sirius suggested with a shrug.

"You're not supposed to," Lily said at once, "what if another student found it?"

"I'd rather he did that then get locked out," Remus said in sympathy."I remember that feeling," Sirius nodded, passing the book along to Harry for his turn.

* * *

*I know all of you guys have been hyped up for the big Sirius reveal, and I'm so glad you all found it to be good and in character, but this is the chapter I've been most anxious to get to. Remus is unabashedly my favorite character! (Have you ever noticed if you ask an HP fan who their favorite character is, no one actually says Harry.) I've spent many a long hours trying to understand why and where he was during Harry's life, and I do hope you guys liked the reasons I provided. More will keep coming the more they understand about Harry's and Remus' life later in books five and six, I've got some more theories and add on's then, but until then hope you enjoyed!

** I looked it up, and poor Remus, it was actually a full moon that night, even though Sept. 1st 1993 was actually a Wednesday, but hey logistics of magic means the true full moon was the night before/that morning. He's recovering from it, hence he was okay for the feast that night and why he slept most of the trip; he'd been awake all night as a werewolf.


	6. TALONS AND TEA LEAVES

I can never say enough, how much I thank you all for the constant reviews and support I get just from watching the views shoot up every time I check. You are the reason I do this!

* * *

"Can we please have lunch now," James groaned, rubbing at his stomach and eyeing Lily hopefully before Harry could start.

"Oh yes, alright," Lily sighed, then asked, "would one of you go get the baby please."

Sirius jumped to his feet and did as asked, while Harry followed his Mom into the kitchen, badgering her about letting him help this time. She finally relented, leaving Remus and James in rather awkward silence.

Remus got to his feet and shuffled awkwardly for a second, then gestured vaguely to the kitchen as he began,"ah, guess I'll-"

"I'm not mad at you Remus," James interrupted, patting his hands on his knees with nerves and not exactly looking over at him. "It's not like it's really your responsibility to look after him-"

"But I still should have done something," Remus cut off, temper at himself beginning to rise again. He didn't really get mad at too much, liking to think of himself as a rather laid back person, but his own actions had set him on edge like he had just found out his future self had dumped Harry at the Dursleys.

"Like what?" Sirius asked, making the pair turn and see Sirius leaning against the door, the baby cradled in his arms.

Remus cast his mind around before offering, "gotten Dumbledore to set up somewhere I could have seen Harry, even if it was infrequently it would have been better than nothing."

Lily and Harry made their reappearance, Lily catching on at once and cutting in, "sorry Remus, but I don't see that happening."

"Why not?" both James and Sirius huffed, since this had been something they had both been thinking.

"Well think about it," Lily snapped. "You're sitting there blaming one of your best friends for something that even Dumbledore or Hagrid didn't do! No one had been there to check on Harry since he was left there, or worse Dumbledore knew and did nothing. Why I still can't imagine, but I still haven't forgiven him for what these books have implied he did back during Harry's first year, so lay off someone who might not have even been given a say in the matter."

Sirius opened, then closed his mouth and turned his attention back to the baby, rather shamefully scuttling into the kitchen to get the kid his food. James shifted his weight around, but nodded and caught Remus' eye saying honestly, "okay, true. I am sorry for, ah, being mad."

Remus hesitated, rocking back on his heels and still looking up to arguing the point anyways, then gave a dark laugh at the irony he was still holding this against himself when clearly no one else was. Now more curious than anything, he persisted, "has anyone stopped to question why though? What exactly was Dumbledore thinking when he cut off Harry like that? Remember how we thought ol' Mrs. Figg might be the same from the Order, and all those random people Harry saw when he was younger. Why didn't he grow up with someone telling him what was going on?"

"Dumbledore explained that in the first chapter," Harry reminded, "said he didn't want me growing up knowing my fame and all."

"I get that," he waved off, "and I'm not saying there's an easy way to explain that to you at any age, but if you'd grown up knowing it, been treated as a normal child and not a hero like someone should have while explaining this to you-" he finished giving a suggestive look to Lily like he expected her to give a counterargument.

She didn't though, no one did. They all saw a leader in Dumbledore, someone to be respected and not questioned too deeply, but this was Harry they were talking about. Had he really done something to make sure Remus didn't do exactly this? If so, then that truly was going to tick them all off, where did he get the authority to do that?

Harry was gently testing his feelings, trying not to pry too deeply as he pondered if he'd ever really been given an answer to this. He was still sure his headmaster explained to him more properly about these types of things later in life, but had Remus been mentioned during this? He didn't think so, and now almost hoped he had asked at some point.

With nothing else to say on the matter, they ate lunch in relative comfort, and after they were done Sirius insisted he wanted to keep the baby around again. They were all confident nothing to bad should happen to Harry this year, so no one protested as Sirius began one of the toddler's favorite games, and started releasing colorful puffs of smoke from his wand while he used his chubby fists to clutch at them, random peals of laughter erupting all around.

Harry took one more moment to capture this, looking around at his family and determined to keep this very image in his mind for the rest of his life, before starting his chapter.

"Highly doubt it was actually that funny," Sirius said in a goofy voice since he was still mostly entertaining the kid.

"Wow, Sirius was right," Remus rolled his eyes.

"First time for everything," James grinned.

"Easier said than done," Harry grumbled.

Harry ground his teeth together in annoyance for a moment, but then Sirius gave a snarky laugh and demanded, "was she actually trying to scare you, because that was pathetic."

"Probably caught sight of his own reflection," James grumbled.

"My sentiments exactly," Remus smirked.

"Now there's something I would have liked to see," Sirius grinned, still not completely over his disgust at the beasts, but pretty sure he'd tolerate them just to watch that.

James grimaced and nodded in disgust, having personally never been there himself, but knowing someone else who had that came back in the same way.

Sirius refused to let his mood drop back down at this nasty little reminder, continuing his own personal game with the baby, which made the others realize all the more why he had insisted on wanting him down here.

"How could I forget," James smiled, distracted at once from keeping an eye on Sirius to make sure he really was okay.

"I want that chapter," Sirius said at once. "I haven't gotten any of them!"

"Well you can have it," Remus said in disgust, "cause I'm rather sick of them at this point."

"Cheer up Moony," James said with a shrug, "yeah those past ones were awful, but there's no way anything like that can happen again this year. I'm sure Harry will finally have a good game." He finished with more hope than he should have, rather annoyed that his son couldn't seem to go one year without something bad happening.

"There's a pick me up," Lily smiled indulgently, still personally feeling she'd rather pull Harry from the team altogether, but it was clear he enjoyed the game as much as any of these boys. She didn't have quite as much faith as them that everything was going to be peachy this year, but she hoped as well.

Harry was blinking in puzzled shock and confusion, and then looked around to see the others were as well. What on earth could Ron have said that felt so significant to him?

"Can she really have just doubled up her schedule like that?" Lily asked with interest.

"I don't see how," Remus shrugged. "Like Ron said, there really isn't enough time in the day for all of that."

"Then what's she playing at?" Sirius demanded.

They all shrugged, at a complete loss, and Harry continued eagerly hoping for a better answer.

"Well that explained nothing," James grumped.

"That's impossible though, right?" Harry asked, ruffling up his brows with confusion and annoyance that he really thought he should know the answer to that.

The four of them exchanged stunned looks. Not as impossible as Harry might think, but time magic was a very obscure thing, hardly anyone understood it properly, and those that did, didn't share willingly. For Hermione to have gotten a hold of something like it, even with McGonagall's assent, was mind blowing to them all.

After a bit more of a pause, Lily said slowly, "well, no, not impossible dear. Very ah, very hard to pull off, but not undoable."

"How?" Harry persisted, getting rather eager now they really might know.

"Can't say for sure," James said, running his hand through his hair in confusion. "It's not something any of us have knowledge about, correct me if I'm wrong." He finished with a hopeful look at his friends.

They however, both shrugged and agreed with the couple. Sirius thought he had once heard of something odd in time magic happening to an Unspeakable, but it had been from a girl in a bar months ago, so he couldn't actually remember the details now. Something about a girl, named Eloise Mintumble, dang what had happened to her again?

Harry nodded in understanding and deflated a bit, knowing it wouldn't do any good to continue pestering them about something they couldn't answer. He did ask though, "but, what if you wanted to take Arithmancy and Divination, if they really happen at the same time is it just not allowed?"*

"Well no," Lily said fairly, "you'd have to rearrange your schedule and possibly take it without your normal classmates, like Hermione would attend Divination one day and most likely take Arithmancy with perhaps the Ravenclaw students instead of her usual house, and that would have explained it if she wasn't taking three at once. There really just isn't enough time to work all of that in. Plus, it would have been marked on her schedule as such, not the way Professor McGonagall worked it up."

"Yes, Ron's the one being silly," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Wow, she really wants him to let this go," Remus said with a frown.

"And I really hope Ron doesn't let her," James replied with the same frown.

"Because it's weird," Sirius insisted, not that anyone here needed him to remind them of that.

"Well that's not encouraging," Lily frowned in concern.

"A bit ominous," James agreed in surprise. They really did like Hagrid, but his few experiences with Harry and his pets hadn't ended well so far.

"Don't fret you two," Remus rolled his eyes, "Hagrid can handle anything in that class."

"So do I," Lily muttered.

"That, I will admit, is kind of gross," Sirius wrinkled up his nose. "Eating with that thing on the table."

"See," James nodded, "we're not the only ones."

"Well glad we get to see this new class," Remus said eagerly. He didn't think much of the future seeing magic, but he wasn't exactly against it either.

"Sorry it had to be so far away though," Sirius grimaced in disgust.

"That's not even funny," James snapped. "If he's going to mock you, at least come up with something better than a three-year old's act."

"James," Lily said severely, wondering if he'd just realized he'd said picking on their son was okay.

"What?" he snapped right back. "You can't stop children from picking on each other Lily, the world doesn't work like that."

The two sat there for a few moments giving each other moody looks, so Harry just decided to read on and hope to ignore this.

"Glad to see the whole house has the same sense of humor," Sirius said in disgust, "has to make Malfoy feel better about himself somehow."

"Seven won't either," Remus grinned, finally finding a lighter topic to discuss. "In fact, I'm pretty sure there's no one who actually knows every secret about this school."

"We did, back when it wasn't being used," James nodded. "Peter found the entrance to it, and we kind of used it as a secret meeting place sometimes." Privately keeping out where else they tended to spend their free time. Harry did know about the Shrieking Shack, but not how to get there.

"Wonder what they did to it now it's a classroom," Sirius said eagerly.

"There are a few," Remus nodded, "but either way, it is a long walk."

"Oh I remember this nutter," Sirius smirked, now watching Harry eagerly to see how he reacted.

Remus leaned in and whispered in Sirius' ear, "if only they had some sort of map to help."

Sirius nodded eagerly, but Harry didn't notice the exchange.

"Credit to him for noticing that," Lily said in approval.

"Agreed," James nodded, "I always find something interesting to talk to them about."

The way he said it made it quite clear these talks weren't always wholesome, but Harry was laughing lightly so Lily didn't see the point in demanding details.

"Bet his attitude hasn't improved any," Remus rolled his eyes.

"I'd be more worried if it did," Sirius shrugged, "he is a painting, their behaviour shouldn't change too much."

By then the three boys were laughing in both remembrance at their own interactions with Cadogan, and Harry's astonished look at the little painting. Only Lily didn't really know how to feel just now, not used to this rather exuberant nature from a painting.

"You are so sweet," Lily smiled at her son, which only increased the boy's laughter all the more at Harry's concern for a painting.

"That'll get his attention," Remus nodded approvingly.

James opened his mouth to say something, but then quickly closed it again. He didn't seem to find mocking death that funny anymore.

"Bet he wouldn't have minded staying in that painting a bit longer," Remus whispered, making Sirius release a surprised snort of laughter, making the baby in his lap giggle anew.

"He's certainly handy to have around," Lily said in some unease, still finding him rather odd.

"Plenty entertaining to," James smirked.

"You'd be surprised how often someone mental can come in handy," Sirius grinned.

"She seems to enjoy a show," Lily said in amusement.

"At least it sounds comfortable," Sirius grinned, "much better than those stools in the other classrooms."

"I would have fallen asleep in there for sure," Remus rolled his eyes.

"You're actually starting to make me sleepy just thinking about it," Sirius nodded in agreement.

Lily rolled her eyes indulgently, she'd clearly pegged this woman right about putting on a show.

"Explains why we didn't even know who she was before now," James nodded.

"Think she really does have an Inner Eye?" Sirius asked with amusement.

"She clearly thinks she does," Remus pointed out, causing all of them to laugh again.

Harry and Lily couldn't help but notice how giggly the lot of them were being, and wondered if this was how they normally made up a fight, making a lot of idiotic jokes at each other.

"Now that was just a bit pompous," Lily scoffed.

"All teachers think their branch is the hardest," James agreed.

"Sounds like a loaded class if you ask me," Sirius raised his brow in surprise "if the teachers already saying she can't teach you much."

"I can see where that would bother her," Lily nodded.

"Are those actual fields of magic," James asked between loud bursts of laughter, "because I think Sirius is most proficient in the smells!"

Remus muttered something under his breath that caused all three of them to continue laughing like idiots. Harry waited indulgently until they had subsided before continuing.

Now they were frowning, not finding that remotely funny. Why on earth would this woman say something like that to a child?

"What does Ron do to her?" Sirius chuckled.

"Might not be Ron," Remus reminded, "one of the Weasley twins might pull something on her later."

Lily made a little 'pfft' noise in disbelief.

"Well she's just going to be buckets of fun huh?" Sirius snickered.

Harry puzzled why he felt like Trelawney was right, but shrugged and kept going.

"Can't blame her at this point," James nodded, still smirking, "she probably thought she'd get the next death omen."

"That poor girl," Lily frowned. "Why would she say something like that?"

"Like you said," Remus shrugged. "I think she's enjoying scaring them. When that Friday comes and goes, and nothing happens, I'm sure these kids will realize they're being played."

"Kind of wishing I'd taken Arithmancy now," Harry grumbled, more annoyance coming up the more he heard about this new teacher. He also had a vague feeling, like she did something really important to his life, or perhaps said something to him? It was such a little thing he didn't really even register it underneath all the grumbling.

"That's self-fulfilling prophecy," Lily pointed out, "if you say something like that, it's bound to happen."

"So none of you really believes in this stuff?" Harry clarified.

"I think psychics exist," Sirius shrugged, lounging back comfortably. "I had a Great Aunt that was one, she actually did these same kinds of things and had my brother and I going for ages. This Trelawney woman in particular? Nah, she's enjoying herself more than anything."

"So, was your aunt really psychic, or pulling the wool over a couple of naive kids?" Remus asked.

"Both," Sirius grinned, "Dad swears she made a real prophecy to him when he was younger. Never did tell me what it was though, but the way he said it, yeah I believed him."

"Well, aside from Sirius and his gullible nature, no, I don't think any of us believe this," James grinned.

"I'm not gullible," Sirius snapped right back. "Prophecies really do exist!"

"Moving on," Lily rolled her eyes at the pair.

"Well that was fast," Remus remarked.

"At least there's a bonus to this class," Lily grinned.

All four of them released surprised snorts of laughter at Harry's sass, he clearly wasn't taking this class very seriously, though none of them said it in fear of eliciting a joke from Sirius.

"Sure she does that on purpose," James nodded.

"Think she heard that, or just good timing?" Sirius asked.

"Timing," Lily shrugged, "Harry can't be the only one who's thinking that."

"Sounds like life," James rolled his eyes, "so sorry to Ron for living."

None of the boys bothered to stifle their laughter one bit, even Lily was giggling and said to James, "Ron just beat you out of a joke dear."

"I'll forgive him," James chuckled, still bright-eyed.

"An acorn means gold?" Remus demanded. "What exactly does that book translate?"

"You let me know if you figure it out," Harry smirked.

"Ron just went from a hippo to a sheep," Remus smirked, "can't imagine what either of those things mean."

"Did she say to do that?" James snickered. "I don't think she said to do that. Could have saved a bit of confusion."

"Wow, thanks, I was trying to forget that for five minutes," Lily huffed.

"How did she get a falcon from a hippo?" Sirius demanded of nothing.

"I love Hermione," Lily beamed, "that girl keeps everyone in perspective."

"She is good to have around," Remus agreed with just a hint of admiration at this girl saying something like that to a teacher. James said as much out loud in amazement, none of them having guessed it would be this girl who would make a smart comment like that to any adult.

Then Sirius defended her, saying, "now remember what got them to be friends in the first place? Hermione's clearly willing to do a lot, like lie, to defend Harry and Ron."

Harry was smiling, more than pleased his family didn't seem to find either of his friends annoying like he knew some of the kids at school had.

"Well I've never met an unhappy one so I'll believe you," Sirius smirked.

"How do you get a club and a hat twisted?" James burst out laughing.

"Well she's certainly got their attention," Lily said, raising a brow in surprise.

"Guess she didn't see that coming," Remus smirked.

"She's really hamming this up isn't she," Sirius noted.

Harry rolled his eyes and said, "as if the whole class wouldn't ask after that little scene." He remembered the sinking feeling of attention as all of the students got up to go around them.

Sirius lost it. Still holding the baby to him, he continued laughing and blinking tears out of his eyes as he realized just how accurate that sentence was. James and Remus weren't much better.

"A giant, black, Scottish Deerhound is going to be tailing you for the rest of your life now," Lily nodded in approval, "well she's got that one right."

"I- told you-" James said between gasping breaths, "we should have- call-called him Grim!"

"And I told you," Remus rebutted, massaging his ribs and trying very hard not to continue laughing as he said, "we should have called him Cloud. It's got a better theme."**

"I like Padfoot," Sirius sniffed, "I think Peter had it better saying we should nickname more after the animals."

"Which is why you two won the vote," James agreed.

Harry was very curious and wanted to ask what other nicknames they might have considered, but decided to ask that later. ***

"I'm rather flattered she thinks so much of me," Sirius smirked.

"You're so big headed," Lily rolled her eyes at him, "you think every black dog in the world relates to you."

Remus muttered something that made Sirius snicker again, and James release another snort of laughter.

"Ha!" James laughed, eyes gleaming with continued mirth. "Hermione's going to be the buzz kill to this class, isn't she?" He didn't sound very sorry about it.

"Well this class obviously needs one to keep them from exaggerating," Lily nodded in agreement.

"A first for both Hermione and a teacher I'm sure," Sirius nodded.

"Was that supposed to be insulting?" Harry asked.

"I guess," Remus shrugged.

The boys almost lost it again, snickering away while Lily continued to giggle as well and state, "if you have to do that much to figure it out, it's hardly a good sign."

Harry couldn't help but smile indulgently at all of them. Back then he knew his thirteen-year-old self had been equally scared and annoyed by this, but watching his family mock the whole instance actually did put a funny spin on it. It also helped to know what exactly had been dogging him this year, and that he obviously wasn't going to die anytime soon.

"Oh, snappy," James smirked.

"Nice little reality check moment," Lily chuckled.

"Oh please," Sirius rolled his eyes, "these students are so easy."

"Oh, not Ron to," Remus groaned.

"Well he did grow up learning about Grims and such," James nodded fairly. "Remember how Peter flipped out when he first saw Sirius, called him a Grim too. It can be a little shocking at first."

"I think they're just being superstitious kids," Sirius snorted, rather siding with Remus on this one.

Lily rolled her eyes in contempt, this woman really was going to get on her nerves, wasn't she?

"Well that was a fun first class," Sirius said with chipper.

"Honestly can't wait for the next one," Remus agreed.

"Not a good omen for how the rest of the year works out," Lily grinned.

"Not a pleasant feeling," Harry shrugged, "though sadly I was used to being stared at by this point."

All five of them went bright-eyed with interest at this, James and Sirius sharing a wicked grin. Sirius adding on, "this was the class that gave us this idea!"

"We did all kinds of research for ages," James agreed, "double checking all sorts of facts to make sure it would work."

"Did you know what animals you were going to turn into?" Lily asked with interest. "It would be rather pointless to go through the whole process and find out you were all something small and not useful."

"Yes," James nodded, "there's a charm that will tell you. It's fairly reliable, never seen it be wrong."

Harry looked extremely interested in this, nodding as he remembered all the things McGonagall had talked about in this class, and dearly wishing he could spend hours interrogating his Dad and Sirius about these things. He somehow knew, without understanding, he'd never taken to becoming an Animagus himself, but he did rather like the idea. Why wouldn't you want to turn into an animal at will?

Lily, while still finding the fact that they were illegal one of her greatest hangups as of right now, was rather curious on the subject. She didn't have the inclination to be one but found the whole concept of your animal spirit fascinating. She was determined as soon as those three boys registered, she'd end up launching a whole field worth of studies.

That garnered a laugh from all of them. "'Not that it matters'," Sirius chuckled, "oh, she's completely miffed she doesn't have their undivided attention."

"Well can you blame her?" James demanded, still smirking himself. "It takes a lot of work to become an Animagus, I think she enjoys that round of applause for her dedication."

"Why am I not surprised," Harry nodded, always thankful he could rely on Hermione to answer the questions he found uncomfortable.

All three boys released surprised snorts of laughter, making Lily and Harry give them concerned looks.

"Oh don't mind us," James wheezed, looking far too giddy for the comment as far as Lily was concerned.

"Yeah, we're just over here trying to understand why she always got so lofty with us, when she goes around saying things like that," Remus cackled.

Sirius looked likely to fall off the couch soon, he was still laughing and trying his hardest to not let the baby fall and squirming all around. James finally took over the situation by taking his son back, forcing Sirius to come back down to earth.

There was a brief squabble where James won and was still cuddling his son as Harry continued.

"Well she's just a right ray of sunshine," Lily laughed, unable to keep that sarcastic tone out of her voice.

"She's really going out of her way to make sure this class knows how she feels," Remus grinned.

"Best teacher ever!" Sirius grinned like a maniac.

"Love her confidence in you," James agreed fervently.

Remus and Lily just laughed lightly, and Harry couldn't help but agree with all of them.

"You were actually scared of this?" Lily demanded, some of her humor gone and annoyance rekindling at that teacher.

"A bit, yeah," Harry admitted with a shrug, "but I guess it was just the environment and stuff. You guys convinced me already it's ridiculous."

"Glad for that," Sirius nodded with content.

Lily snorted and shook her head, but didn't bother to repeat herself.

"Wow, this is really bothering him," Remus noted in surprise.

"Like I said," James offered with a small frown, "Ron might just be the superstitious type. Once he realizes it doesn't really affect anything, he'll get over it."

"Not the best thing to tell him right then," Sirius said lightly.

They all nodded, that had been about what they were expecting.

"Now that I'll disagree with," Remus smirked.

"Ouch," Lily winced in sympathy. "Okay, I know why Ron's so spooked about this now."

"Yeah," Sirius and Remus nodded together, determining to stop picking on him for this now.

"That's Ron's middle name," Harry said randomly, looking for something more pleasant to think about.

"That was a little harsh," James frowned.

"Agreed, that's not something she should have taken so lightly, even though it probably is a coincidence," Remus agreed.

"Nah," Sirius chuckled, "there are much scarier things to die of fright from than that."

Remus couldn't help another bursting laugh. He wasn't used to Hermione giving off such dark humor, but he found it all the more hilarious coming from her.

"She's got another point," Lily nodded in agreement.

"Ron and Hermione are taking this to an extreme," Sirius noted, "it's a petty argument. Why are they treating it like this?"

"They treat everything like this," Harry noted in a long-suffering voice.

"Wow," James said, raising a brow in surprise, "and you put up with this all the time?"

"Yep," Harry nodded, popping the P for emphasis. He was far too used to this to really care though.

"Temper, temper," Remus muttered, noting she did seem to have one before as well when it came to this type of thing.

Harry blinked, both shocked and puzzled, then glanced up and around to see the rest of them were as well.

"What did she mean?" Lily asked anyways, not really expecting an answer from all the blank faces. "She hasn't been to that class yet, she's been with you all day."

True to her guess, no one answered. They were all rather stuck, and found it rather frustrating they couldn't figure something out about a third year. Bright as Hermione was, how on earth could she be doing something like this, and none of them understood how?

"Glad Ron's just as confused," Remus muttered.

Harry pushed eagerly past his confusion about Hermione, wanting very much to remember Hagrid's first class.

"A first I'm sure," Lily said with just a hint of sarcasm.

"Oh come on!" James groaned in disgust. "They already have to deal with those jerks in Potions."

"Probably the dumbest conversation ever," Sirius grumbled.

"At least he's enthusiastic," Remus grinned.

"The best teachers are," James agreed.

"Oh please no," Lily shuddered.

"He shouldn't," Sirius frowned, "at least not until his sixth year, seventh at the latest."

"Say what?" Lily balked at him.

"Sure," Remus shrugged "the advanced classes learn how to find and study them in their more natural habitat."

Lily frowned, not really sure how she felt about this. She'd heard more than enough about Harry being in there, but then she could hardly fault him if he did do it for a class. Then again, one of those times he'd been in there was for a detention, and that hadn't exactly gone over well.

James couldn't really help but agree, though he thought this class would go a long ways to helping his son if ever he did choose to go back in there.

Lily still couldn't help but release a breath of relief, thankful that she didn't have to deal with that place for now.

"Uh oh," Remus frowned.

"Ah, was there some kind of instruction manual we missed?" Sirius asked curiously. "Because I thought you never did get that thing open."

"I didn't," Harry nodded, looking rather upset. He felt like he'd let Hagrid down by this, but he still had no clue what to do with that book. He was also trying very hard to ignore this impending sense of doom, something wrong was going to happen in Hagrid's first class, which made him very uneasy.

"Poor Hagrid," Lily frowned, feeling sympathy for him.

"Don't know what to say honestly," James shrugged, "cause I've got no idea either."

Remus blinked several times, wondering if he'd heard that right, but no one really interrupted Harry to find out since he was fixing to read it anyways.

"Well there you go," James said, quirking a brow in surprise.

"Points for originality," Sirius agreed, "I never would have thought of that."

"That jerk," Lily frowned severely. "He didn't figure it out any more than anyone else. Hagrid should take points or something away from him, he shouldn't be allowed to talk to a teacher like that."

"Here's hoping," Harry nodded in agreement.

"I agree," James nodded fervently. "Now that I get the joke, I think it's actually quite hilarious, a monster book that you have to pet to open."

"Wish it had ripped your hand off," Sirius grumbled.

"Wish you'd done more then tell him off," Remus huffed, he more than agreed someone needed to knock that kid down a peg.

"Wait, he didn't say which page to turn to," Lily noted with concern.

"Wonder what he's showing," James agreed with more curiosity than anything.

"Is that his go-to for everything?" Sirius asked in disgust. "How does anyone stand this kid?"

"Search me," Harry muttered with disdain.

"And that joke is still not funny!" James snapped.

"Hippogriffs," Remus and Sirius said at once, both grinning at this prospect.

"This out to be fun," James grinned brightly.

"I didn't even know the forest had those," Lily said with honest interest. "Though I do wonder if that wasn't a little big to start?" She posed it more as a question than anything, not having much to do with the field she wasn't really sure on the matter.

"Nah," Remus shrugged, "sure it is a bit advanced, more would have preferred showing that towards the end of the year than the first class, but it's not above them either. A competent person can learn how to handle one easily enough."

"Sure," Sirius nodded. "We only ran into one, they're really secluded and spend a lot of time in the high branches. This little foal fell down in front of us, and the parents were close by, so we didn't stick around even though we did know what to do with them."

"Oh come on Harry," Sirius said bracingly, "I haven't agreed with a lot of Hagrid's pets before this, but you've got to admit this one fits the bill."

Harry nodded in agreement as he said, "it was like seeing a Centaur for the first time. Just took me a moment to get over the shock before I could appreciate it fully."

"This class is depressing me," James rolled his eyes.

"Leave them be," Lily scolded at once, "Hagrid hasn't even gotten to how to handle them yet. I'd still be nervous too."

"There's always one brave one," Remus beamed.

"Well that's not good," Lily frowned at once. She didn't like those boys more than anyone else, but she certainly didn't want to see them get hurt; which was bound to happen if they truly weren't paying attention to Hagrid in this instance.

"Those little jerks better not do anything to mess with Hagrid," Sirius growled at once.

Harry's bad feeling was rearing up again at once, and he didn't like that his first instinct was to think Sirius was right.

"Ouch," James winced, "and that was sound advice, why are they still so nervous."

Lily just looked to the ceiling in wonder, did any of these boys have a sense of life? They certainly didn't show it very often, since it seemed more often their first instinct was to jump headlong into whatever they saw fit.

"Now that's a legitimate concern," Lily nodded in understanding, "exactly how tame are these?"

"Quit being such a worry wart Lily," Remus chuckled. "Hagrid's there, and I'm more than confident he can handle this. No, they don't like being tied down, but who does?"

Lily hesitated a moment more before nodding, and amazingly her nerves actually did relax.

"That'a boy," James nodded in approval.

Harry grinned hesitantly back, not exactly mentioning that he had done this more out of loyalty to Hagrid, not out of real interest in wanting to get closer to that Hippogriff.

"What would have happened if no one volunteered?" Lily asked curiously.

"Most likely, the teacher would have demonstrated himself," Remus shrugged, "in this case Hagrid obviously, but there's always one brave soul who volunteers, so it's usually not an issue."

"Oh please," Lily muttered scathingly, "this exact set of circumstances would have happened whether Harry drank a cup or not."

"Now Lily," Sirius said at once, a light gleaming in his eyes, "think about that. Divination doesn't write what is to happen, it helps to predict what could happen."

Lily looked rather stunned for a moment before nodding, admitting she'd been a little too harsh that time.

"Can't believe you're defending that subject," Remus noted in surprise.

Sirius chuckled and admitted, "well I still think that teacher was rubbish, but I'm hardly going to pass up an instance to correct Lily."

She scowled over at him without any real heat, causing Harry to chuckle lightly before reading.

"Which means you're going to want to start blinking at once," James noted with amusement.

"Glad you're smart enough to listen to him," Remus nodded in approval.

"Wonder why," Sirius asked curiously.

"Probably because Harry was still too close, the hippogriff might still have felt threatened," Remus speculated, though not for sure since he wasn't there. There was also the fact that, these were still animals, and it was impossible to truly ever predict what they would do, feel, or think.

"You're not exactly getting into this," James noted lightly.

Harry just shrugged, he wasn't taking that back.

"The area where the beak merges into their face is a particularly scratchy spot to them," Remus nodded, "so I'm sure he did, if you were patting in the right spot."

"Did they really want that thing to attack you?" Lily asked in disgust.

"After what he said about Hermione last year, I'm not putting anything past him," James hissed.

"Ride him?" they repeated in shock.

"Now that is a bit advanced," Remus noted, "definitely should have been a bit later in education when he's had more confidence, and time, with the beast."

"Guess Hagrid really wants to show off," James shrugged, unable to hold back a hint of jealousy, this was something he'd never got to do before.

"It won't be," Sirius agreed, "but a fun experiences all the same." He also sounded just a tad envious, he would love to try something like this.

It took a lot for Lily not to snap at them; they were being idiots again, but she also consoled herself that she might be just a bit jumpy and over reactive of late, so held it back she did.

"He didn't even give you a saddle," Remus noted in amusement, "nor did he mention where you are supposed to hold on."

"Didn't exactly give him anything to steer either," James remarked, "so I'm hoping this one doesn't get any ideas."

"Sounds like a ton of fun," Sirius said eagerly.

"Though I'm glad you're hardly going to quit the Quidditch team in favor of starting a Hippogriff team," James snickered, finding plenty of amusement in that.

"You didn't exactly sound like you were enjoying that," Remus noted with high amusement.

"It's not something I'd want to repeat," Harry admitted, then he blinked for a moment and wondered if that gut feeling was really telling him he had done just this. He certainly hoped not.

Lily couldn't help but grin, more than happy to admit she was just as happy to hear Harry was both safe on the ground, and didn't have a sudden urge to go back up there again.

"Typical," James grumbled, "they think it's plenty fun now."

"He did have problems with his broom," Sirius remembered, "he's probably just as nervous now, which I'm sure that hippogriff noticed."

"Buckbeak just lost some points with me," Remus muttered to Sirius, who nodded in agreement.

"He what!" Sirius choked out.

"That idiot," Remus frowned, leaning forward in concern. While he hardly liked Malfoy, that kind of insult could get him killed.

"Uh oh," James muttered, bouncing around in agitation now, causing the baby in his lap to giggle, thinking this was a new game.

This sadly didn't actually release any tension in the room this time. They had been begging for someone to hit Malfoy for ages now, but not like this! What if this kid really did die? They would all feel ten kinds of awful for ever having mocked him, he was still a child after all, a bad one but still, even Malfoy didn't deserve that!

Harry was reading in honest panic now, very much not appreciating that he had been right in this instance.

They were all still frowning in deep concern. At least that wasn't in the chest like they had feared, but there was some very important things in the arm that Malfoy could still die from if this got too serious. None of them could think of a thing to say, so the quiet remained while Harry read.

"About what?" Lily arched a brow in disdain. "How was that Hagrid's fault? Malfoy was the one who didn't listen, in fact I'd laugh if someone decided to give him a detention on top of this."

James managed a half amused laugh at this, noting lovingly he had been thinking along those same lines.

"It was Malfoy's fault!" Remus snapped in disgust. "They can't fire him, he didn't do anything wrong."

Sirius released a surprised snort of amusement, noting pleasantly, "you just mimicked a kid we hardly even know this time."

Remus gave him the stank eye, he still didn't find it that funny.

"Ooh, I'm so scared," James scowled.

Lily was the only one who looked rather touched by this. Malfoy was an awful child, but they were seeing him from Harry's perspective. If Malfoy had actually managed to get a girlfriend, maybe he really wasn't as bad as he pretended. She declined mentioning this, knowing quite well the boys wouldn't find that interesting.

"Very true," Remus nodded in agreement, "and he did get there fast enough, there really shouldn't be a problem." Even he couldn't deny that there was still hints of nerves in his voice even as he said that. The best medics in the world couldn't fix everything.

"Agreed," Lily sighed, more than disgruntled at the boy's actions.

"Not a particularly good sign," James frowned in concern.

"They wouldn't really fire Hagrid would they?" Harry asked anxiously.

"Dumbledore wouldn't," Sirius said at once.

"They really shouldn't," Remus agreed, explaining better, "if a teacher got fired every time an accident happened in this school, they'd be going through teachers by the month. Accidents happen in a building full of too many kids and not enough supervision, it's just a fact of life. They really can't blame this all on Hagrid."

"Let's hope a Malfoy will agree with you," James muttered, no hope at all in his voice.

Sirius was still a little too distracted to notice this time Harry had just mimicked someone.

"Well then it's a good thing there are more witnesses than those prats," Lily spat in disgust.

"Why?" Sirius demanded, blinking at the random distraction.

Lily frowned pitifully at him, not exactly wanting to mention she had a good idea why Hermione might say that. Harry had a good idea as well, but simply read out sadly.

"Oh," was the only answer Sirius could come up with to that, slumping back in his seat and crossing his arms moodily. He had almost this whole bleeding chapter without having to think about that, now here was Hermione bringing it up.

James took pity on him and passed him back the baby, forcing an almost genuine smile back onto that Godfather's face.

"Of course you are," Remus scoffed, "if Ron said it's not curfew yet, then it's not." He failed to mention something he had noticed, but the others seemed to have skipped in this whole mess. He hadn't seemed to have called Harry to his office yet for that talk that was so desperately needed... surely he was just busy because of the first day back, right?

"Crap," James muttered in concern, but he was the only one who did. The others had tensed up, now fearing the worst really had happened and someone had actually managed to fire Hagrid. This really shouldn't be possible though, only Dumbledore actually had the power to fire his staff, and no force on earth should have convinced him to do this!

Lily opened her mouth in outrage, fully prepared to give a verbal beating to the poor schmuck who had done this to Hagrid, but Harry had been reading ahead a bit desperately, and read loudly before she could get started.

"Oh thank Merlin," Sirius said in relief.

"It doesn't matter what Malfoy says," James said hotly, "Dumbledore won't fire Hagrid! I'll bet my wand on that, especially because it wasn't his bloody fault."

Sirius released a half-hearted smirk, but he was honestly too curious to hear the answer to reply this time.

"Liar," Remus spat at once in disgust, this finally distracting him from his own thoughts. "If Madam Pomfrey fixed him, then she bleeding fixed him. That brat's lucky he didn't lose his whole arm, I'll be surprised if he even has a scratch left."

"I'm glad you believe me Harry," Remus noted in amusement.

Harry gave him a grin while Lily groaned and said, "oh not you too! Please don't encourage that, it's annoying enough when Sirius does it."

Before any of them could comment further, Harry decided to keep reading loudly to avoid a useless dispute.

They all pursed their lips, unwilling to admit this had sort of been on their mind earlier, but then James riled up and grumbled, "but Hagrid was handling things fine, it was Malfoy's fault for not paying attention."

Since they all agreed with him anyways, and couldn't think of anything else to add to that, Harry kept going still rather subdued.

James poked Sirius before he could mention it this time.

Sirius stopped his glaring at his best mate to smile warmly at Harry, knowing without a doubt any of them would have done the same thing in a heartbeat.

Remus chuckled and began in a conversational tone, "well, if you do go up to the Hospital to get checked out, make sure to point out to Madam Pomfrey that she needs to discharge Malfoy on the grounds he's an idiot."

"Duly noted," Harry nodded.

"And I agree," Lily smiled lightly.

"Well that'll clear you up quick," James chuckled.

"Wow," James blinked in surprise, "overreaction much."

"Guess I really wasn't allowed on the grounds," Harry noted absently, rubbing his ears at the remembered volume.

Sirius grumbled something under his breath, but refused to let himself react this time, pulling his wand back out and creating a puff of red smoke and making the little baby giggle all over again, the act making him feel slightly better. Though he was forced to continue listing.

"Unnecessary as that is," Lily noted, giving Sirius a protective sort of watch to make sure he really wasn't going to sink back down into a depression again, "that was still kind of sweet."

"I'd just like to point out that if Harry didn't know what was going on before, Hagrid would kind have blown that then," Remus agreed, placing his elbow on Sirius' shoulder and leaning on him as if he were bored with the whole topic.

"Chapter's over by the way," Harry nodded towards Remus for his turn.

* * *

*Question offered by Grank, I know it's not the best explanation especially when you consider sixth and seventh years who all take combined classes with all the houses and so it wouldn't work out in the same time frames then, but that one really did stump me. I'll try to work out something better and have Harry bring it up again at the end of the year.

**Random note, the dog that played Sirius in the Order of the Phoenix movie was a Scottish Deerhound named Cloud, thought it was funny enough to put in here.

*** Anyone want to suggest some nicknames? I've thought up a few more I'll sprinkle in, but I'm just curious.


	7. THE BOGGART IN THE WARDROBE

Remus got wearily to his feet, and Harry noted with some concern he looked paler than he did yesterday. Was this book really taking that much out of him? He wanted to ask, but felt it slightly rude, so he kept himself quite as Remus went to his chapter.

"Really," Sirius demanded, "he milked that injury for almost four days!"

Harry's face twisted in annoyance, fighting down the urge to say that it was probably longer than that.

"Look on the bright side," Lily smirked, "he probably had to make up all that work. I know none of those teachers fell for that."

"Oh wait," James pouted, "how come you haven't had Remus' class yet?" 'Plus, has Harry really gone four days without talking to him' he added in his head, biting at his lip and trying to not snap at his friend for that. What possible reason could he have now for avoiding Harry? Dumbledore surely wasn't still stopping him?

"We didn't have it until that afternoon," Harry said, also still eyeing Remus curiously as he realized the same thing.

There was a sticky silence for a moment as they all realized this fact, but aside from Remus ducking his head and fidgeting with the sleeve of his robes in agitation, no one said anything this time.

"I'd like to see how he does in a real fight," James snapped bitterly.

"Probably run away, or hide the whole time," Sirius agreed.

"Subtle," Remus frowned in annoyance.

Lily rolled her eyes in annoyance, knowing full well he wouldn't have done that to any other student. His attitude was really starting to tick a nerve with her.

"Glad we're all on the same page," James grumped, keeping an eye on Lily to see if she agreed. To his surprise, she did seem to.

"Oh, this is just going to be brilliant," Sirius scowled in pure annoyance.

Lily grimaced, knowing that would have been an actual concern had something really been wrong with him, but one, there wasn't a thing wrong with his arm, and two, he should get his friends to help him; not pick on her son.

All five of them muttered something foul under their breath, knowing full well this was going to drag on, and already hating it.

Lily couldn't help but give a vindictive smirk, knowing full well she would have done the same thing as this would completely ruin that little jerk's potion.

"Dang it," James frowned, "I wasn't even sure he'd realize that was important."

"Know that look all too well," Sirius grumbled, his face twisting around with dislike.

"What did I do to deserve this chapter," Remus huffed. "We'd gone so long without having to deal with this guy."

"Wow," James said in surprise, "credit to him for that dedication."

James had to bite his tongue to hold back his comment that he didn't find Snape very dangerous at all, but he reminded himself of the age difference again.

"I should feel really special huh?" Harry grumbled.

"Nah," Sirius smirked, "remember, he's going to be sharing that look with Remus from now on."

That at least caused Remus and James to chuckle, while Lily was quickly losing her patience with all of these boys.

Harry scowled even more heavily, more than frustrated he was no longer allowed down at his friend's place to help cheer him up.

"Your father can bite my-"

"James," Lily cut him off, matching him glare for glare. "You lot shouldn't be cussing so much, it's still a bad habit with the baby around."

Sirius rolled his eyes and grumbled something about how he still couldn't understand them, but Remus decided to keep going anyways.

That drew a smirk from James and Sirius again, very much hoping Ron would make good on that threat soon.

"Remembered vividly as the guy who tried to blackmail the school governors," Remus reminded in forced light tones.

"Why's he bragging to you anyways?" Lily demanded, "it's not like you care."

"Search me," Harry huffed.

"Next time I'll make sure it actually is ripped out of socket," Sirius snarled a little too forcefully it seemed, since the baby in his lap gave a little whine of displeasure. Sirius forced himself to relax and give the kid a cuddle then to relax them both.

"At least it was already dead," Remus said weakly, trying to force some humor into Harry's outraged face. Harry ignored him.

James let out a string of words he thought quite appropriate, but low enough under his breath he didn't think Lily heard him.

"Is he really going to do this until he stops faking his injury?" Sirius demanded, looking faint.

"How long can he milk that?" James demanded of nothing.

No one had an answer for either of them.

Lily's eyes kept narrowing the longer Remus kept going, so that it looked like she was squinting over at him, but the expression was so terrifying none of the boys really wanted to call her out on it.

Personally, James was rather pleased at this. It was horrible what Snape was doing to Neville, but it seemed Lily wasn't going to be defending him much longer. It honestly blew his mind how she still was, considering their last rather public conversation.

Lily was bright red in the face by the end of this, so Harry, feeling they may as well get the explosion over with, told her, "Mom, you look like you're fixing to start screaming here soon."

Lily sucked in a very deep breath, then said in an almost steady voice, "probably, but I'm trying not to." She trailed off into foul mutterings about how that wasn't any way to treat someone who had messed up, but when she sat back and made it clear she was still trying to keep it under, Remus decided to keep reading while he could.

"That man has no bounds," Remus scowled, now he was turning on Hermione just for offering to help.

"He what!" They all yelled in outrage.

"He can't do that!" Remus spluttered, "that's endangering his pet."

While Harry was just as furious as anyone else, he did consider Neville his friend if not as much as Ron and Hermione, but his curiosity won over and he asked, "What's the difference between this and using animals in Transfiguration?"

"Well, first of all, you don't use your own pets in classes," James pointed out, "though I wouldn't be too surprised that he does keep Trevor on him, I remember that little thing always trying to get away."

"But," Remus cut back in before James could get to off topic, "the main difference is that in other classes, there shouldn't be any permanent harm. If you get the spell wrong, then your teacher should just be able to reverse the effects. Correct me if I'm wrong Lily, but you can't always correct potions."

Lily shook herself in surprise, she was still introverting on herself in shock that she actually didn't feel any lingering need to defend Snape to these boys anymore. That effect had worn off the moment she'd heard that he was actually willing to hurt this child, in one of the cruellest ways she could deem possible, by purposefully hurting his pet. For what? He had no reason, Neville had never done anything to anyone, and yet here he was singling him out almost as much as Harry and being downright hateful to everyone else. Even after he had called her that awful word back in fifth year, she'd still had hope. No, she'd never forgiven him, nor had she gone out of her way to defend him in school any longer, except to this lot. There had always been something about the Marauders that had gotten under her skin, and even after her and Severus had parted ways she'd never been able to stomach the still rather public fights. So when she'd heard that Dumbledore had hired him, she'd harboured hope, that somehow he had changed after her death, become that same friend she'd once known, why else would Dumbledore hire a known Death Eater? Now, every last bit of that was dashed, and the contempt mounting in her was as fierce as the night that mess between them had started. Then Remus had called her name, and she gave herself a firm little shake and came back to the actual conversation, asking him to repeat the question.

He did, albeit a little hesitantly as she still looked a swirl of emotions, but she answered crisply "you're right, some potions just can't be corrected. From what it sounds like, yes Neville's should be salvageable, he seems to have only doubled some ingredients, so if he does the same to his other ingredients that are in, it should balance out and be fine. Still doesn't excuse that teacher from acting like that though" she finished, fire blistering from her at the end, making Harry want to edge away even when it wasn't directed at him.

James and Sirius exchanged wide-eyed looks, they hadn't ever seen Lily this mad at him before, and it both amused them in the worst kind of way that she finally wasn't defending him, and scared them slightly.

Remus caught Harry's eye, who nodded indicating he was done with his question, so Remus was quick to move on for now.

"Oh bloody hell," Sirius groaned, letting his head fall forward so that it was pressed forehead to forehead with the infant. James and Remus both gave him pitying looks, but no one could think of anything to say to him. If Sirius was going to react like this every time he was mentioned, then they were going to run out of comfort for him real quick. Then the baby hooked his chubby little fists into the length of his godfather's available hair, causing a bit of a distraction as he tried disentangling himself.

Remus still looked like he wanted to say something, but James was now quickly waving him on, trying to press past this as fast as possible while Sirius was distracted.

James scoffed and rolled his eyes. He, like Remus, was all for Sirius making his way to Hogwarts and coming into contact with Harry, those dementors be damned. If Sirius had figured out how to get past them once, surely he could do it again and have a proper conversation with Harry. Ron's fears were silly, but since everyone here knew that, he didn't bother saying any of that.

"Like yourself," Sirius smirked as he finally got himself loose from the kid's surprisingly good grip.

"Sirius, that's gross," Lily told him pleasantly.

He snickered, not looking very remorseful as he began bouncing the baby around again so that he would be a bit more amused, and not take it out on him again.

Remus raised a brow in surprise, finding that a rather odd thing to say. Looking around, he saw the others seemed just as perplexed.

"Suppose Malfoy knows I'm 'after him'," Sirius offered in forced light tones, "guess he just means Harry's being a coward for sitting around and not taking the fight to me I guess."

"Yeah, guess so," James agreed, "but why would Malfoy know that? It doesn't exactly seem like public knowledge if Fudge is trying to keep it quiet and away from Harry."

"Guess Malfoy really does still have connections in the Ministry to know," Lily said with disdain.

"Half wish he didn't," Sirius muttered in disgust. Despite Harry's adamant mood that he wasn't afraid of him now, it still bothered him that his little pup would think that at any time in his life.

"Revenge for what?" James demanded of nothing, starting to clench up his hands in disgust. He hated to hear this continuously talked about, and he already had a dozen reasons to punch this brat in the face, so this continued conversation was getting under his skin.

"Lucius would know you and Sirius are friends," Remus pointed out. "Perhaps Draco thinks Harry knew about that, and that Sirius 'doing this' would be offensive to you."

"That's a little loose if you ask me," Lily shrugged.

"Got any better ideas," Sirius shot right back.

There was silence, which meant that none of them really did.

They all breathed a silent sigh of relief, knowing full well if Hermione hadn't stepped in something really awful could have happened. It still didn't excuse the act itself that Snape had done of course, but at least this way there wouldn't be any lasting damage.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," Sirius meant to smirk lightly, though it looked a little more forced than he'd planned.

All who weren't reading muttered some crude thing or another under their breath, finding it loathsome that he was clearly wanting an audience for this.

"Blackhearted little monster ain't he," Sirius muttered for his friends ears alone. The three of them were still rather wary that Lily hadn't said anything yet, so they were trying their hardest to keep the comments down…for now.

"All of them," Lily asked warily, "really?"

"The ones I was looking at," Harry shrugged, "which was mostly Malfoy's, and Pansy's friends." He did note that he hadn't exactly sat there and pointed out every single student's expression, so maybe he had generalized that.

There was a much more profound breath of relief this time, each of them very happy Hermione had clearly done a good enough job the potion was the correct color.

"Can't believe they let this turd be around kids," James muttered furiously.

"Say what?" Lily snapped in outrage.

"That's what finally got to you?" Remus demanded right back, looking over at her in surprise.

Lily wasn't listening, it seemed to be taking every ounce within her not to start screaming at all of the problems with this. His abuse of power, his clear displeasure that he hadn't managed to kill the pet in front of its owner, now he was punishing him for doing it right! What in the bloody hell had happened to him to turn him into this?

When the silence continued to drag on, Remus decided to read on, noting he hadn't exactly gotten his answer, but the deadly expression on the red hairs face was plenty answer enough.

"I'm with Ron on this one," James hissed.

"First of all, because that git wouldn't have believed either of them anyways," Sirius pointed out.

"Also, because what would be the point? He'd still take the points away, if not more because he'd then accuse her of lying," Remus agreed.

"Think she forgot something in class?" Lily noted absently, still more red in the face then anything and clearly only half paying attention.

Harry puzzled, somehow knowing that wasn't actually the correct answer, but the others were appeased enough by this, and he had no real idea why he would correct her as there really wasn't any other answer, so he said nothing.

"There you go then, Lily was right," James shrugged, "maybe she has a necklace that fell off."

Harry very quickly opened, then closed his mouth. That his dad was closer to the mark he was sure, but somehow this still didn't feel like the full answer. Again he chose to say nothing, for the same reasons as before.

"She's really fast," Sirius rolled his eyes, noting he might not have noticed someone turning around behind him either if he'd been raging like Ron had.

"Did he really just ask Hermione why she was carrying books around?" James laughed in disbelief.

"But a dozen?" Remus demanded. "Exactly how many classes is she taking?"

"All of them," Harry reminded.

They all sat around, newly puzzled but still blank on how Hermione could be pulling that off. Could it be possible she was simply getting one of the students in that class to copy notes and give them to her? At least that would make sense how she was keeping up with more than one class at a time, but not how or why they were still marked on her schedule that she needed to go.

"Yes!" James and Sirius cheered, instantly distracted from Harry's friend. Yes they had all noted Remus' absence this week, and were beyond confused and slightly hurt he still didn't seem to be going out of his way to try and talk to Harry like they would have thought, but getting to sit in one of his classes first hand felt like a real treat to them.

"What did you think she was going to do with them?" Lily chuckled, finally coming off of her bad mood at least a bit. "Run all the way back to the dormitory? She's got them with her now, so she's obviously going to keep them the rest of the day."

"Very much so, yes," Harry agreed.

"For shame Moony," James snickered, "being late. Can't hardly tell off your students for that now, can you?"

Remus rolled his eyes indulgently, half wondering if he wasn't still stalling a bit on being around Harry, and half wondering if he actually did have a good reason. He probably wasn't going to get a real answer to that though.

"This is depressing me again," Sirius rolled his eyes.

"So sorry Harry describing me, very accurately I might add, is so awful to you," Remus smirked.

"So this is going to be fun," James brightened all the more, knowing any practical lesson from a teacher was always better than book ones.

"Which is awful really," Lily noted. "DADA is one of those classes where you really should have just as many practicals as lectures."

"I'd be very insulted and confused by that if I didn't know what you meant," Remus laughed.

"Ooh, is he going to take you outside?" Sirius asked, looking likely to start bouncing in place here in a moment.

"You two are way too excited about this," Remus told them pleasantly.

"No such thing," James scoffed, "we know you'll do brilliantly, we just want to see what you actually do."

Remus didn't actually seem to have a response to that so, blushing slightly now, he was quick to move on past.

"Why?" Harry asked.

"Did you really just ask why that Poltergeist did anything," Lily laughed, "he does it because he thinks it will cause problems."

"I just meant why this in particular?" Harry corrected himself. "It wouldn't really stop anybody in the castle would it?"

"Filch," James pointed out, "he couldn't magic it out, or otherwise open the door without the key."

"Oh, right," Harry nodded, then he eyed Remus curiously, wondering what he was going to do about the matter. Ignore it, or stop him?

"Glad to see he still remembers me," Remus laughed.

"Guess it doesn't count after Remus locked him in a closet one time," Sirius snickered.

"Only worked for about a second, but it made me feel better," Remus shrugged, "he's hated me specifically ever since."

"And Merlin knows how awful that would be," Lily giggled.

"Not going to take that now are you," James smirked, even more bright-eyed now as he recognized all too well the expression on his friend's face. No way was he going to let Peeves do that without some small payback, especially in front of students.

"Sure this is just heart wrenching for you," Sirius snickered.

"Cool," the other three said with interest, James and Sirius only half manageable since they were still snickering away at this lovely visual mental image. Harry watched them all curiously, but didn't interrupt to ask what that spell did, since the book was obviously fixing to say.

Now Harry was laughing right along with them, mentally storing that spell away for future use, and hoping he'd asked for specifics of that spell. Was it a spell that merely shoots gum up a person's nose, or was it more generalized that it would shoot anything up a nose, or perhaps it simply shot a small object in a preferred direction? He decided to ask for the details later.

"How do you know his name?" Sirius stuttered, still half out of breath from his laughing fit.

"How should I know?" Remus reminded, thinking most likely he'd just come across him in a hallway or something as unmentionable.

"Kind of makes you wonder if that was just a little setup?" James muttered to his friend, who nodded with enthusiasm. The pair wouldn't put it past him to perhaps go that particular direction that Peeves was in, since despite his words, Remus most likely would want his class to respect him, especially this class.

"Now Remus," Lily began, unable to keep a teasing tone out of her voice, "what exactly are you getting these students into?"

"Nothing that you're thinking," he responded back kindly, causing Sirius to release a bark of laughter.

James was looking lovingly over at his wife, never not finding it amusing when she beat him to a comment.

"Oh not him again," Sirius groaned, "as if I didn't want him dead once today already."

To be perfectly honest, he actually said that while eyeing Lily, hoping to finally get some sort of response out of her. Still no one answered him, and while Remus agreed, it didn't stop him from reading what was about to happen.

James frowned and cocked his head to the side, silently noting that Snape wasn't exactly being professional right then, he really should have addressed him as a Professor in front of the students. Then again, this was Snape he was thinking about.

That finally seemed to have done it, Lily got to her feet anyways, but instead of the screaming fit they were all expecting, she walked calmly over to Sirius and took her son away, then went up the stairs muttering that he needed his diaper checked.

Harry watched after her, a little fearful at how she seemed to be handling this. The other boys were more than wary at this point. "Can't believe Lily's still sticking up for him," Sirius said in disgust, craning his neck around to keep an eye on the stairs to make sure she hadn't heard that.

Remus shrugged and leaned back casually as he said, "personally, if she is still defending him, someone really needs to get it through her thick head enough is enough. How on earth can she excuse him after this?"

"I don't think so," James shook his head, looking more puzzled than anything now. "D'you see the way she looked right before she did that? Honestly I think the only thing stopping her from screaming her head off about him was the baby in the room."

Harry was personally on his Dad's side, he'd recognized that look of loathing on her face before as well, but before any more could be said Lily came back in, and offered the baby back to the boys. Sirius took him happily, and no more was said after Lily simply waved Remus on.

"Agreed," Sirius nodded with conviction, still keeping a wary eye on Lily like he was still expecting her to snap at him. She did no such thing, and her expression remained almost neutral.

"Thank you Remus," James said sincerely, "that poor kid needs someone to stand up to Snape for him."

Remus was beaming, knowing full well he'd do this again in a heartbeat.

"Good riddance ya foul little beetle," Sirius said in a goofy, baby tone of voice, getting a reaction from the baby, but clearly still not pushing Lily's buttons enough. James gave him a hard nudge in the side, clearly saying he needed to knock it off now, but Sirius was enjoying this too much. He'd held back a lot of comments on account of getting told off by Lily for it, now it seemed that wasn't going to be the case anymore, he was going to have a field day with this.

"Oh," Remus said brightly.

"Know what it is?" Lily asked with interest.

"A couple things came to mind," he nodded, "and it makes plenty of sense now why I would have brought them there."

"Can't hardly blame them," James agreed, "they haven't exactly had a lot of good practice dealing with anything in this class."

"Ooh, this is going to be fun," Sirius nodded happily.

"Glad you lot approve," Remus chuckled lightly when the others agreed.

"Impressed those two know what that is, considering the little education that's been going on in this class," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Don't think it's fair for you to have said that, when I'm the one who told you that happened in my house," Sirius pointed out.

"Still a relevant point," Remus shot back.

"No surprise there," Harry nodded.

"Then what does it look like?" Harry asked inquisitively.

Remus cocked his head to the side in curiosity, thinking on that for a moment before answering, "no one knows. I'd assume it would likely be in a form it thinks would scare anyone who snuck up on it, yet until it grasps hold of one mind, there's no real way to tell."

"One mind?" Harry repeated, just a bit of anxiety creeping in now.

"It can read your mind," Remus nodded, "that's how it knows what will fear you most."

"Now that we've got that covered, though you're likely to just go over it again," Sirius pointed out in a long-suffering voice. Remus gave him the stank eye for a moment, but didn't deny that.

"Poor kid," James couldn't help but grin.

"Like Remus is going to let anything too bad happen," Sirius rolled his eyes at the ludicrous thought.

"That was almost rude," Lily said a little cheekily, not really meaning it as Harry hardly looked upset. "He didn't exactly have his hand raised."

Remus shrugged, not looking very abashed, he was sure he wanted to know especially what his little cub might know about magical creatures, no he wasn't taking a special interest that would be ridiculous…

"Does she really answer every question from a teacher?" James now asked. "That hardly seems fair to any other student."

"I'm sure if anyone else ever volunteered, the teacher would pick someone else," Sirius shrugged.

"Now when did this happen?" James asked in surprise.

Remus then had a surreal moment as he realized he was very soon going to be experiencing and doing things, without any of his friends around. What exactly had he been doing these past twelve years? He couldn't help but sink down into himself a bit when he realized he had no answer, nor did he particularly want to find out. It was also rather odd to think he had memories then that he had no idea about now… but since it was a rhetorical question anyways no one said anything.

"Always loved the name of that spell," Sirius said, maybe a little too loudly that time, as he noticed Remus' mood seemed to have gone down a pinch. They were still enjoying his first class too much to allow him too much self-depression again, so he was hoping to cheer his friend back up. It didn't actually seem to work that well.

"That poor boy," Lily fretted, "has he no confidence at all?"

"Then this class will help," James said adamantly.

"You seem to be enjoying this a little too much," Sirius smirked at him.

Getting a smile in return as Remus answered, "I always enjoy watching others interact with Boggarts, never ceases to amuse what interesting things people will come up with to laugh at."

All four boys released surprised and amused snorts of laughter, while Lily pursed up her lips so tightly the skin went almost white. She didn't find it the least bit funny that he had clearly scarred this student so badly, this little third year was now terrified of him! Despite the fact that there wasn't any danger around, Lily reached over and clutched her son's hand to her for a moment to comfort herself and convince her mind not to start screaming about this as well, she would have to hold it in until she was a little more alone without an audience for when she broke down and really dug into these soon overflowing emotions that she was trying very hard to keep a lid on.

"I note Remus actually used his title, not that he deserved it," James pointed out, in a less harsh tone than he would have liked to, still too keyed up and happy to be hearing about this.

Which gained yet another laugh, this time from all present. Even Lily couldn't deny that, yes, the adults of your life that you lived with would tend to scare you a bit.

Sirius and James lost it. They knew quite well what exactly Remus was planning just by that simple sentence, but they reined themselves in very quickly, refusing to explain to a confused Harry and Lily what they were now very sure what was about to happen. Remus looked pleasantly amused with himself as well, feeling this was more than justified just from the little comment he'd made about Neville at the beginning of class.

"Brilliant, this is beyond perfect," Sirius muttered, pure glee in his expression.

"He has no idea," James guffawed, almost stuffing his fist in his mouth to keep himself contained so he could listen.

Remus couldn't get through that whole sentence without having to stop and stifle his giggling. James and Sirius didn't even bother, and by the end where Harry and Lily realized where this was going, they weren't any better. They didn't even need to be there to see this, the vivid mental image it painted was one of the best any of them could have come up with.

Sirius tried to speak in between bursts of laughter, "this…is…your…best…prank…ever!" There might have been more, but he still wasn't that intelligible.

"I wouldn't really consider it a prank even," James disagreed, wiping at his eyes to clear his happy tears away, "'cause he's not really doing it to Snape. He's just creating a little revenge for the poor kid, and no one can even do anything to say it's wrong."

"Wouldn't have been too surprised if it had simply disappeared then," Lily chuckled.

"No, it has to be more direct," Remus coached.

That finally dried up a bit of laughter in the room as one person in particular from that class came to mind. All eyes flicked to Harry and away quickly, not really wanting to think on what could scare him the most. A Basilisk came to mind, or giant spiders, even that demented spirit of a creature Voldemort had become, sticking out of the back of Quirrell's head. Any of those were likely to come up when the boggart turned on him, and none would be very pleasant reminders.

They all made a face and shifted around uneasily, not exactly happy they had been right in one of their guesses, and also wondering how you even could make that funny. Putting him up in a dress and handbag just might not work as well.

"Should probably be everybody's greatest fear," James nodded in agreement.

Sirius couldn't help the involuntary shiver that came when he heard about those things all over again, matched by Harry now.

"Now that's interesting," Remus noted lightly, eyeing both Harry and Sirius curiously.

"What?" Lily asked, a little reproachfully. She didn't think anything that scared her son should be treated with interest.

Remus didn't seem to notice the tone as he answered, "their greatest fear seems to be fear manifested itself. I've never heard of that before, but it makes sense."

Sirius huffed and grumbled something under his breath, cuddling the baby closer to him and muttering that wasn't what he was really afraid of, but the others ignored him as James said, "agreed, now let's see how Harry decides to make that funny."

It was clear he didn't want to linger on the subject, and no one argued the point.

"Well kudos to Ron, he both admits what he's afraid of, and knows how to deal with it," Sirius nodded in approval.

"Can't even blame you on that one," Lily said with sympathy.

"Though I'm sure Remus would have given it to you anyways," James shot back.

"Still don't want to ask for it," Harry reminded with a shrug.

Sirius snapped his fingers and said, "I know, you could light its cloak on fire, might look funny to watch it flail around the room like a ninny."

The others managed a small smile for his attempt at humor, but none of them really thought it was that funny, or that Harry would think to do this; though they all hoped.

All of them smiled with real pride at this, he wasn't even really anything to do with them, but they still couldn't help but feel proud this boy was clearly forcing himself to stand up to this.

"Give it to him Neville," James said under his breath, eyeing the book with wide-eyed hope.

"Could the Boggart actually perform a spell," Harry blurted out, instantly feeling bad as he too wanted to know if Neville had pulled this off, but the question had just sprung to mind.

No one actually looked annoyed at him, indeed they were rather pleased he truly didn't seem to be bottling up his questions anymore, and Remus was quick to answer, "no, it doesn't carry the magical ability of what it turns into. In this case it would just brandish a wand, scaring him further, until it could pounce and kill him."

Having already pictured this lovely mental image didn't draw back the laughter one bit. The four boys were very sure indeed they would never not laugh at this mental image, it was far too perfect for anything they'd ever come up with. Lily couldn't deny she was still amused as well, though now her lips were more twitching than outright laughter.

Sirius randomly noted that Remus had actually known all of these kids' names, but decided to let it go, who knew why he knew these students names before they introduced themselves. It's not as if he'd called roll to learn them, but maybe he was just overthinking this one.

"Oh yes, those can scare the daylights out of you," Lily nodded in agreement.

James and Sirius released snorts of laughter at that, that's not what they had been thinking to do to it, but that was funny all the same.

"Wonder when Seamus would have run into one of those?" James asked with interest.

"Wonder where that other girl would have run into a mummy?" Lily countered.

"You don't actually have to run into it for it to scare you," Remus reasoned out, "just the thought of it can be enough for the boggart to latch on to."

All of them laughed lightly at this, James actually applauding that logic.

The three Marauders winced at the random reminder that their friend wasn't here to enjoy this, but Remus didn't pause to let it last.

"Bloody hell," Sirius spluttered, looking genuinely disturbed at that, "who thinks up that?"

"Now that might actually have a story to it," Remus nodded with just a hint of disgust, but he still read curiously to see what Dean might do with it.

Which garnered a new round of laughter from all of them, definite points for originality on that one.

"I'd like to remind someone of this the next time they pick on Ron for being afraid of spiders," James said, giving a lofty look at Lily, who pointedly ignored him. She'd already taken back and felt bad for giggling at him before, no need for him to remind her of that.

"Poor Ron," James said in sympathy.

"Give him a chance," Harry disagreed, though he personally couldn't blame his friend one bit if he had frozen, he was probably reliving that awful scene from last year in the Forbidden Forest.

James instantly looked abashed for not having enough faith in Ron, and he laughed right along with the others and applauded him for pulling that off.

"Hey!" Harry said indignantly.

Remus pursed his lips as the others gave him confused looks as well for stepping in like that, but then he shrugged and offered "Guess I really didn't want a Voldemort, or a dementor, appearing in the room right then and scaring the other students." Even to him it felt like a lame excuse, why wouldn't he have given Harry the chance to fight off the boggart like everyone else? Harry was still frowning, not looking very happy with that answer, but Remus really couldn't think of anything else to say. He felt like he should apologize, but would Harry really take it now when he hadn't technically done it yet…or perhaps he might even still be resenting him for still not having come to talk to him this week. Either way, he turned back to the book rather shamefaced at his actions.

None of them really needed to ask, it made perfect sense this would be his greatest fear.

"A cockroach, that's the funniest thing you could come up with?" Sirius muttered, and Remus ignored him.

James and Sirius gave another laugh, but this time they were the only ones who did. Then they frowned at each other, rather annoyed the mood got popped so easily, and really hoping the Remus in the book would get a move on already with what was weighing them all down.

"Can boggarts die?" Lily asked randomly, never having thought of that.

Remus was fidgeting with the pages, not really looking like he wanted to answer. Sirius considered smacking him to try and get him to stop acting like this when he really hadn't done anything wrong, yet. Before he could though James already answered, "nah, they're amortal."

At Harry's continued blank look, Sirius said, "that means that they never truly existed, so they can't ever truly die. It's not really like immortal, dementors are actually the same. They were never born, nor can they ever die, they just exist."

Harry nodded in understanding, and the second the silence lingered Remus was quick to read.

James let out a low, throaty whistle saying, "wow, spoil them much?"

"Oh I'm sure Remus is above favoring," Lily smirked lightly, and then they both frowned when he still refused to react.

"Ugh, I wish Moony was above giving homework," Sirius said in disgust.

Remus did react then, giving his friend an annoyed look, he seemed very close on the verge of pointing out the importance of homework, but let it go at the last second.

"That's not it at all!" Remus flipped, and Harry couldn't help but smile along with everyone to see him talking again, animatedly as he was quick to explain "Harry, I know you're not weak. Then and now," he stopped for a moment and went a little cross-eyed, but ignored the odd time loop, "I'm sure I simply just didn't want you to do it, ah for the same reason I said." It still sounded false to his own ears, but Harry was now eyeing him hopefully, so Remus at least hoped he'd made him feel better. Harry didn't say anything aloud though, so he didn't really think so.

"Oh please let them continue believing that," Remus muttered to himself.

"Now that was funny," Sirius snickered, "you being afraid of a glass ball."

"I'll take that over what it really was," Remus shot back, and Sirius frowned at him, feeling Remus was being a little snappier than was called for. Then again, he was used to Remus getting snippy with him this time of the month, so he didn't push it.

"Well there is that," James nodded eagerly, and Remus really did offer a small smile then for the compliment.

All of them released surprised snorts of laughter then, Harry loudest of all as he had a funny feeling Ron wasn't too far off, but having no idea why that could be.

"Chapter's over by the way," Remus said, giving the book a gentle toss over to Lily, who caught it lightly.


	8. FLIGHT OF THE FAT LADY

A/N: A big stinking thank you to every single person! I'd write it randomly throughout the story as well if I didn't think that would annoy you guys to show just how grateful I am.

* * *

Lily took the book with very mixed emotions. Harry was only one week into this school year and already she felt as wrung out and emotionally drained as his other two years. She would also keep a lid on her emotions and not blow up at Snape like she knew they were all expecting. Hoping it just couldn't get any worse, she hesitantly began to read.

Remus couldn't help but beam with pleasure, while James and Sirius were unsurprised and smirking.

Lily's lips formed a sneer of annoyance; she found it horrid anyone would say something about someone else because of the way they dressed, especially when he couldn't help it.

She saw the boys clench as they fought their disgust, only Remus rolled his eyes, not looking very concerned. He doubted this kid could say anything he hadn't already heard before.

"I like to think I'm a little better off than an old pillow case," Remus said lightly.

"Wonder what happened to Dobby anyways," James said with interest, still rather wound up at anybody insulting one of his friends, but recognizing it couldn't really be handled right now.

"I'm rather sure I find out," Harry said with as much confidence as he ever could when talking about his future, but he did seem rather sure on this matter, so the others let it go for now.

"The good people never do care about such trivial things," Sirius nodded in agreement, always wishing he could help his friend out more if he'd allow it, but grateful that the students had looked past his physical appearance to see the real friend and good person beneath.

However much they all forced themselves to continue ignoring the issue, they all felt just that little bit worse when they realized time was still dragging on and Remus very clearly wasn't going to have that talk with Harry. Why though, what possible reason could he have for ignoring him like this? If it really was Dumbledore stopping him, then what motive could the Headmaster have? Harry deserved an adult wizard in his life, one that would make sure to look after him like Dumbledore himself clearly hadn't. No one could bring themselves to say anything aloud about this topic though, having no more answers now than when this had first come up.

Instead, Harry at least tried to push past that awkward part and asked, "why were you focusing on the dark creatures though? Were we that far behind?"

Remus gave himself a hard little shake, uneasily meeting Harry's eyes as he explained, "well, yes and no. I do specialize in dark creatures, as Dumbledore well knows I enjoy studying them in my spare time. Mostly though that's just what the third year curriculum focuses on, scattered in with the spells used to combat them."

Harry nodded in understanding, while James and Sirius tried not to share an uneasy look. On top of Remus' odd behaviour so far in this, they were also well aware that this was the year when most students focused on how to spot werewolves. That wouldn't be an easy lesson for Remus to teach, and it wasn't any more pleasant to wonder how Harry was going to react to that. He seemed fine with it now, but could they stand it if he had an initial bad reaction to their friend? Of course they were just assuming Harry figured it out like they had, but what if Remus sat Harry down and explained that before hand, it could even be the reason why he was so unsurprised to relearn the news here with them.

More questions than answers, and still none of them dared speak any of this allowed.

Lily grit her teeth in frustration, before reading on forcefully, already having to use a lot of self-restraint to read in a normal tone.

"Bitter old bat," Sirius huffed.

Here James and Sirius again didn't bother hiding their laughter one little bit, dearly hoping they never would have to again.

"Glad he blames me for that rather than Neville," Remus frowned, "at least I can handle him."

Lily wasn't the only one seething by the end of this; they all wanted to strangle this overgrown child for treating a student like that. It was Snape's own damned fault he was Neville's worst fear, and the subsequent boggart form. It was infuriating for him to still not have learned his lesson. His continuation of the treatment to Neville and the other students was doing nothing to stop future boggart incidents. Lily was going to give him a not very pleasant visit soon.

"Oh please," James scoffed with perhaps a bit more acid than normal, still distracted and peeved at Snape's actions.

"Ah the easily fooled youth," Sirius said lightly, finding her rather annoying as well.

"And Hermione has to share a dorm with them," Lily asked in disgust, "I feel bad for her now."

"That must get annoying, considering how loud the school can get. Could you even hear them?" Remus asked.

Harry couldn't help but roll his eyes, finding those girls antics rather annoying as he said, "I hardly spoke to them anyways, and no, not really. By that point I didn't care."

"Oh no," Sirius frowned, "what happened?"

"Ouch," Remus winced in sympathy.

"Poor Hagrid," Lily agreed with a frown.

"Guess I can see that happening," James admitted.

"Ron's also got a point," Sirius rolled his eyes, "flobberworms are very self-managing, and they're pretty much just grub for a few creatures. Hagrid's doing the class a real injustice for lingering on these things longer than five minutes."

"I can only imagine the seventh years appreciating this, as if he carries on too long their NEWT's will be a breeze," Remus agreed with a slight wince.

"Yes," all four boys brightened up at that, and then Sirius narrowed his eyes dangerously at Lily and said, "I swear if you get to read his Quidditch chapter, I'm going to have a fit. It's high time I've gotten my turn at that."

Lily rolled her eyes at him; personally she was hoping she didn't get it too since she had hardly enjoyed the sport even before it seemed to have gone out of its way to pulverize her son every chance it got. She'd gladly hand over the book to Sirius if he really wanted to read it.

"Oh here we go again," James rolled his eyes, "the book explaining something we've already gone over."

"Yes well, since it's about Quidditch, I'm willing to allow this," Sirius smirked.

"At least it was brief," Remus shrugged without concern.

"Oh that's right," James nodded, "this will be his last year there. Poor kid hasn't won the Cup once as captain has he?"

Harry shuffled a little, feeling personally to blame for this, but the others still wouldn't hear of it and spent a few more minutes telling Harry why this was ridiculous of him to think so. He did look slightly better by the end of it, and still had a personal conviction that nothing like this should happen this year, he and his team would win that Cup, he hoped.

Hoping to make Harry feel at least a little better Sirius also pointed out, "besides, it's not like anyone who would review him for a professional team could blame any of that on you. They'd look at his statistics of how many goals he's saved, and other such stats."

Harry did look a little better at that reminder, thinking he had won Wood every game he'd been in so far, and ignoring an odd little feeling like he should correct that statement.

"See, that wasn't your fault at all, just paranoid teachers," Sirius said bracingly.

"Rightly paranoid," Lily corrected, "but I'll admit you're still right too."

"Well they're not modest are they," James chuckled.

"Damned straight," Sirius and James both grinned, having called this way back when Harry started playing, and still convinced until otherwise proven that Harry would never lose a match.

"Err, gee, thanks," Lily muttered, though she was smiling a bit too at how happy Harry seemed at such praise.

"Glad they gave him his credit," Remus approved.

"Aw," James and Sirius said with concern.

"Okay, now I'm really hoping you win this year just because of that," Remus agreed.

While the boys were still giddy with excitement as well, Sirius was personally hoping this match got put off for another two chapters, feeling it was high time he got his Quidditch game.

Harry went from pent up excitement at the prospect of winning the Cup like he so dearly hoped, to disgruntled at once. In all the excitement of finding out Sirius and Remus were alive, right now he was more than distracted by the matter, but he knew his thirteen year old self would still be beyond upset at this turn of events.

Then the four of them winced, having a rather bad track record of that holiday in their opinion, but still more than convinced nothing too bad could happen to Harry this year, or any more years for that matter. Remus and Sirius would get this whole mess figured out…why they hadn't already was still too touchy for anyone to bring up. The point was Harry now had two great protectors who wouldn't let anything too bad happen to him again.

"Did someone magically sign his form, and he's still prevented from going this time," Lily asked redundantly.

Sirius winced, but still said in a forced light tone, "that's not why he's not allowed to go, come on Hermione should be able to keep up better than that."

"She's probably so distracted by her butt loads of homework," James reminded.

Sirius was making goofy faces at the baby again and refusing to allow himself to react negatively to this continued topic.

"She'll say no every stinking time," James grumbled, "because he doesn't have his stupid form."

"They really can't keep him locked up forever," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Argue what?" Lily demanded.

"That I shouldn't," Harry shrugged.

"Hermione's being a bit paranoid this year," Sirius noted, "really, I'm with Remus, she can't expect you to stay cooped up forever."

James couldn't help but snort with laughter at that, the cat was hardly being subtle about its feelings towards Ron.

"Not going to say anything Lily," Sirius asked, still trying to get a provocation out of her, and being more amused the longer this went on. She was trying so hard not to react to anything.

"No," Lily shrugged without looking up, "I'm not perfect, and I'll willingly admit I had to sometimes get help from others on some homework. I think Harry should have tried first, but there's nothing for it now."

Harry wasn't the only one who gave her a surprised look at that, but he did look the most grateful.

"Dang," Remus winced, "is he still after Scabbers?"

"Apparently," James grumbled, feeling all the more annoyed at both cat and girl now.

"Really?" Sirius demanded. "He's trying to eat Ron's pet, and that's her response."

"Both of them need to learn to keep their pets separated," Lily agreed.

"Kind of hard to do when they spend so much time together," Harry sighed.

"Uh oh," they all muttered, knowing Scabbers was much safer in Ron's bag, not that the rat could understand that.

"Good thing he's not a Chaser then," Sirius muttered without any real humor, feeling just as uneasy as anyone else at how this might turn out.

"Where the cat hopefully can't follow," Remus nodded happily.

"At least that went better than I feared," Lily sighed in relief.

"Yeah, but how many more times is it going to happen," James was still frowning, "Hermione should have realized it was a bad idea to buy that particular cat back when this happened before."

None of them could think of anything else to say, all having a very bad feeling this was going to get worse before it got better.

"True," Lily nodded, "but she should have thought of that back when she bought him, and not bought him."

"Buying a cat when one of your best friends owns a rat feels like a recipe for disaster," Remus agreed.

"Now he's just being a little ridiculous," Sirius smirked. "'Heard'? Nah, he smelt him obviously."

"Not the point," James reminded.

"A very good point," Lily huffed, while Remus cocked his head to the side, thinking over that sentence. Scabbers had been getting sick before Hermione bought Crookshanks, so Ron was obviously exaggerating that part as well. This also couldn't be the first time Scabbers had interacted with a cat; surely some other Gryffindor owned one. The truth probably was; Scabbers was getting old, and Ron was projecting his fear of his pet dying of old age on his hatred of the cat.

"At least she asks," James said still a little stiffly.

"Hermione cares," Lily snipped at him for the tone, "perhaps she's not showing it that well, but it's not like she set that cat on Scabbers on purpose. She'd be just as upset if an accident did happen and Crookshanks ate him."

James backed off slightly, noting that at least Hermione's asking was an attempt at the start of an apology.

"And Ron's clearly still holding a grudge," Sirius noted.

Harry's startled look was enough to make the others laugh, never getting tired of his constant surprise of the magical world.

"Know the answer to that already," Remus sighed.

"He's got a point," James nodded when Harry looked like he might try and argue his point. "Unless you outright tell McGonagall why they hadn't signed, which by your track record you won't" he finished in a rather grumpy tone.

Harry sighed, knowing full well he'd never tell a teacher something like that, so remained silent and hoped anyways.

"Oh no," Lily frowned in concern.

"She's a girl," Sirius scoffed, "I'm sure she's just exaggerating."

"And here I thought you actually had a heart," Lily snapped at him at once, ignoring his eye roll. Whether he meant it or not, he really needed to stop making jokes like that.

"Shut it Sirius," Lily snapped at him before he could open his mouth.

Sirius pouted at her, grumbling that she was kind of proving his point about how dramatic girls were, but then James nudged him and convinced him to let it go.

"Aw," Sirius winced, "okay, poor kid."

"Thank you," Lily acknowledged.

Sirius made sure she could see his eye roll this time, stating, "come on Lils, I'm not heartless. I own an owl; I'd be pretty upset if anything happened to him too."

Lily still didn't think he'd gotten her point, that he shouldn't have made the joke in the first place, but decided to let it go.

"Oh crap," Remus said, blinking in shock.

"I'd honestly forgotten about that," James admitted.

"Wow, honestly, I think that Trelawney might have some real Seer's blood," Sirius said in surprise.

"Really Sirius? One right prediction and that's what you go with?" Lily asked, not bothering to try and hide her disbelief.

Sirius shrugged, personally he found the odds that not only had she chosen the death omen that was dogging Harry this year, but now this? No, he truly was beginning to believe this woman might really have a power, even if she did still annoy him for her use of it on his pup. He said as much aloud, and while he didn't really seem to convince anyone but Harry, the others found the argument to become rather circular after a time. Sirius wasn't letting up and he wasn't convincing anyone else so Lily decided to forcefully read on past him.

"Really Hermione?" Remus said with a frown. "Now, really?"

"I can see what she's trying to do," Lily nodded in agreement with both the girl and Remus, "but, yeah, wrong time and place."

"A fair reaction honestly," James sighed.

"Harry, now would be the time to be a good friend and drag Hermione away," Remus pointed out.

"Before she continues making an arse out of herself like this," Sirius agreed. While he still would have argued the point on the probability of this happening on this day, he more than agreed Hermione wasn't doing it the right way.

Harry just sighed, he'd only observed the scene and hadn't really put an opinion on the matter, but he had felt rather bad for his friend as the rest of the class had been giving her harsh looks.

"Now that was just tactless," Lily winced.

"And that was just heartless," Remus huffed.

"Finally I can count on her good timing again," Sirius said weakly, more than happy himself to have avoided that fight, and they weren't even his friends.

"Ouch," all five of them winced, though none of them would admit rather selfishly pleased if Neville wouldn't be permitted to go either. They could hardly get mad at Hermione and Ron for wanting to go, but it would certainly make them feel a little better if Harry wasn't left behind on this.

"Smart woman at least," Lily said aloud, ignoring the internal wince.

"Still don't understand why she's arguing that one," Lily shook her head in disbelief. "Harry deserves to have a little fun."

"Forgot," the four of them muttered in disgust, eyeing Harry in disbelief. They honestly wondered if Harry had told her what really happened if she would have really done something about it, but they couldn't say they were surprised at this point either. Harry's bad habit of glossing over this clearly hadn't gotten any better now that he was older.

"And stammering on top of everything," Remus sighed.

"I could already tell her answer from the look on her face before I finished," Harry sighed.

"That's what you're going with," Lily groaned, "just tell her the truth, and let's sit back and see how quickly they continue living."

Harry gave her a rather edgy look for her tone of voice but chose not to comment on that.

"And now I want to cry for that reminder," Sirius hissed, looking far more deadly than upset in that moment at that stupid reminder they were all Harry had to claim as guardian right then.

"I'd like to think more like confusion," Remus huffed, "since she'd probably be wondering why you really hadn't gotten your form signed."

"With any luck she'll bring it up to you, and you'll investigate," Sirius murmured to him, causing a vindictive smirk to appear on both of their faces.

"The worst part is, McGonagall's still in the right," Lily sighed.

"Yeah, she's not exactly being helpful this year," James sighed.

"Not exactly the worst consolation prize," Sirius offered bracingly, and Harry tried his best to give him a smile he didn't really feel.

"Now there's an idea," James said, going bright-eyed.

"Except that Harry just got done saying he hadn't had his form signed," Remus reminded.

"Harry could have mailed it back and had it signed," Sirius said, mind now churning with possibility as he came up with a story for this. "He shouldn't give it to her until the day before, gives some credibility to the idea, and he'd have to mail himself something that looks like that in case McGonagall notices how often he gets mail. Most likely she doesn't, but it's a safe backup."

"You are putting way too much thought into this," Lily told him.

"Nonsense," Sirius scoffed at the same time James said, "no such thing."

While Harry didn't disagree with them, he had a sinking feeling that all of Sirius' planning didn't actually come true then, and hardly looked happy about it as Lily read.

"Well dang, clearly no one in your dorm thinks outside the box," Remus sighed.

"Wish you'd go to the twins for help," James grumbled, "they could sneak you in no problem."

Harry perked up suddenly, his dad's words finally gave him that feeling he'd been missing, and he had a very good feeling this just might be what happened at some point. Still too worried about being wrong on the matter though, he didn't say this.

"Which might have worked if not for those bloody dementors," Sirius grimaced.

"Oh this can't be good," James groaned.

"Not as Seriously as I could have," Sirius said quickly, clutching the baby to his chest to prevent either of his friends from smacking him.

"You shouldn't be allowed to do that," James grumbled, looking rather disappointed that he didn't have a chance to get at him.

"I think I should claim rights," Remus huffed, eyeing the baby, "you've been holding him long enough."

"I might share if you didn't look like you were about to slap me once I did," Sirius smirked.

"He only listed like a fourth of the good stuff," James huffed under his breath, making sure Harry didn't hear that one so he really wouldn't feel worse.

"That's when you know you have some good friends," Sirius smiled brightly, "when they put aside their differences for you."

Harry couldn't help but beam right back, trying his very best to smother how much he really missed his friends.

"I get the feeling it wasn't actually an offhand tone of voice," Remus said lightly, "but good effort for trying."

'Which was basically every third year and up, aside from Harry,' they all sighed in their head, but kept that comment to themselves.

"Of all the bloody rotten timing for him to-" Sirius began, using a bit more of a threatening growl than normal because of his depressed mood for his little pup being left behind.

Harry grumbled something about he really couldn't picture that. Honestly the other four really couldn't either, it was never worth passing up an opportunity getting out of the castle, with permission the three trouble makers mentally added on.

"Oh yeah, almost forgot about him," Remus said in surprise.

"Well he clearly wasn't dogging you that year, or he would have been mentioned by now," Sirius pointed out.

"No, thankfully he hadn't memorized my schedule again," Harry said in relief, but repeated, "but he still went out of his way to talk to me." He didn't exactly look pleased, but he had to admit this was still better than last year.

"I don't see that as being at the top of his to do list," James smirked.

"Pretty good on the spot lie," Remus appraised.

"Because you deserve it for sleeping in the middle of the day," Lily snapped right back.

All four of them were wincing in pain, hating how truly upset and lonely he seemed to be right then.

"You can't ever really be doing nothing," James said loudly, trying to get at least a small smile out of Harry again.

Sirius noticed at once and continued, "yeah, like technically right then you were walking, that's something. Or you were standing, that's something to. You can't ever really be doing nothing."

Harry recognized what they were doing and really did give them a small smile for the effort.

"Funny part is he actually wasn't doing anything wrong right then," Remus chuckled.

"Probably had another flashback to when he caught James like that," Lily pointed out lightly.

"He just thinks so much of all of them doesn't he?" Sirius snickered.

James rolled his eyes and pointed out, "it's not like it's curfew or anything; Harry can go wherever he wants to in that castle."

"Like that's ever stopped Filch," Remus pointed out.

"At least that'll be something pleasant," Lily sighed.

"Yes!" All five of them brightened at once. Surely the fact that Remus had just called out to him meant he really couldn't ignore him this time! Why he had waited until now, months after school had started they still couldn't guess, but now would be the most perfect time to finally have that talk Harry so desperately deserved.

"Well I should hope so," James agreed.

"Remus I will give you all of the gold in my vault right now if you bloody ask him about this," Sirius said, nearly bouncing around in anticipation for what this could mean.

"And Harry actually tells him the truth," James noted.

Remus couldn't help the pessimistic little niggle that Harry had known him for far less a time then he'd even known McGonagall, so why would he tell him something like that? He looked so dejected Sirius finally gave up the baby and passed him along to Remus, which put a smile on his face at once.

The two boys refused to let them get their hopes down. So Remus hadn't started off like they would have preferred, but it was finally happening. He and Harry were completely alone with the best amount of time no one would walk in on a conversation that was so desperately needed. If Remus didn't get to it this time, they would know something was up.

"I always get those confused with kappas," Lily said absently.

"Kappa is Japanese for cucumber," Remus said randomly.

At Lily's blank look he shrugged and said, "when I was first learning about them, I found that a random and interesting fact, so when I got to grindylows it was an interesting distinction."

"Okay then," Lily said with a shrug and a small smile, not having actually expected an answer.

"You are the only person who would actually keep that thing in his office," Sirius snickered.

"It's not that weird," Remus defended. "Where else would I keep it?"

"In the staff's supply room, where all the other teachers keep their stuff, like live animals, they plan on using for class," James said in a duh like voice. "Did it never occur to you why McGonagall and Flitwick don't have a bunch of random animals around their offices?"

Remus rolled his eyes; he wasn't going to argue the point.

Remus grimaced and turned his attention back to the child, hating just how awkward it clearly was for the two of them to be in the same room. He felt lucky Harry had accepted at all, considering the past two DADA teachers had attacked him.

Harry tried to catch his eye and give him a reassuring smile now, to prove he didn't still feel that way, but Remus was clearly ignoring everyone else in the room now.

Sirius couldn't help but give a little surprised laugh, Remus had obviously been checking up on Harry's other classes.

"I'm sure you two had a nice long conversation about him," James snickered, having quite the amusement at McGonagall telling Remus all the things Harry had been up to the past two years at school.

Harry looked mildly annoyed at this, not really appreciating the thought of teachers sitting around gossiping about him, but couldn't find it in himself to be to mad at Remus for this, knowing now that he probably just wanted to know more about him.

"Now that would have been interesting," Lily said, eyeing Remus who did look mildly entertained at how that reaction would go. Most likely, if his assumption was correct, Sirius would have already told him that he'd seen Harry then; but he certainly wished Harry would tell him. It would help ease into the conversation they were all wanting to hear about Harry's past really being explained to him by someone who really knew.

Which popped any form of happiness Remus was feeling, and he turned as if to quickly say something to Harry, who waved him off and said, "I know, you already said it now. I didn't know then."

Remus still didn't look very happy, but admitted there wasn't much else he could say right then.

Remus winced and began bouncing his leg in high agitation now, greatly amusing the baby at least though it didn't seem to be helping him now. He would never not hate just how little Harry seemed to trust him, Harry should have been able to come to him with any of his worries since he could talk, not this nonsense where he was lucky Harry was talking to him at all!

His emotions were written all over his lined face, so Sirius took pity on him and tried to put some comfort into his words as he said, "Let it go Remus. Yeah this sucks, but there's no sense in dwelling on this now that we're going to fix it." Sirius was still rather torn about Remus in the future. His actions were more annoying than anything; what could be holding Remus back, from stopping him from seeing Harry like he should have. But had decided to wait until that reason was revealed before he fully passed a judgment on Remus' actions.

Remus didn't exactly look comforted, but Lily decided to read on anyways.

Which made them all perk up as if Christmas had suddenly been announced. It didn't matter what had changed Harry's mind about telling Remus, the fact that he was meant more to all of them then they could have put into words.

"No, sorry, not really," Harry told him, still smiling faintly.

Remus fidgeted around a bit, but shrugged all the same, still unsure what to say about his future actions.

"Now that would have been just stupid, one thing Remus usually isn't," James noted.

"Usually?" Remus snapped without any heat, to which James ignored him.

Remus rolled his eyes, he still didn't think this was a good enough reason to publicly deflect Harry the way he had, though his classmates clearly hadn't noticed, he still didn't like the way it had made Harry feel. Then Sirius leaned over and whispered in his ear, "glad to see you obviously still know him so well, even then." Which caused him to smile in spite of himself.

Lily was watching them curiously, noting the change in Remus' demeanor, but kept going when it didn't look like they were about to explain.

"I can see why you'd find that so surprising," James said fairly, "since, aside from Dumbledore, you've yet to see anyone else do that."

"Whom Remus idolizes, so even if he didn't have his own brain, he'd still do whatever that man said," Sirius rolled his eyes.

Remus scowled lightly at him. Yes he was eternally grateful to the headmaster for everything he'd done for him, but Sirius had made it sound like he had blind faith in the man… which he didn't. Mostly. Okay, maybe a little, a lot, before they had read this, but after all the things the book had implied Dumbledore had done to Harry he wasn't one hundred percent sure on that anymore.

"I can see that," Harry said fairly.

"But it still wouldn't do you any good, even if I had been right. You still should have had practice at it just like anyone else," Remus argued back.

James suddenly burst out laughing, causing Remus' annoyed look to double up on him. "What?" he snapped, his tone far sharper than Harry would have thought.

James hardly looked offended, or even surprised, as he admitted, "you do realize you are arguing against yourself right. How is that not funny?"

Remus paused with his head cocked to the side as he realized what James meant, then gave a wane smile and sat back and cuddled the baby as he gave up on the pointless argument.

"Glad to see you agree with yourself on some things," Sirius snickered, causing Remus to stick his tongue out at the pair.

"Well you can't blame him for thinking that," Lily defended.

"Oh I know," Remus said at once peaceably.

"Dang it," they all muttered, wondering who on earth could be interrupting them now when they were finally talking!

"What were you going to ask anyways?" James inquired.

"I was going to ask him about the effects dementors could have on people," Harry admitted. "Wanted to ask why I passed out and Ron didn't."

They looked all the more annoyed now, very much wanting Harry to be able to get that answer, so even before the person came in they were in a disgruntled mood.

"Gah! Can't go one bloody chapter without wanting to hex him lately," Sirius snapped.

"What's he even doing there?" James frowned, "I sincerely doubt it's a casual visit."

Harry was just as curious as the others, thinking back and wondering why something significant might be fixing to happen, so eagerly asked his Mum to go on.

"Try something in front of Remus you slimy little git," Sirius growled.

Remus couldn't help but agree this time, if he started in on Harry he'd have every reason to step in, though he somehow doubted Snape was that stupid.

"Say what now?" James demanded, doing a double take on that.

Lily was looking down at the page, clearly just as confused as anyone else.

"What would you be accepting from him?" Sirius demanded, looking at his friend like he'd just declared he and Snape were the best of friends.

"Whatever was in that goblet I guess," Remus shrugged, looking just as perplexed as anyone else.

This was such an odd interaction, they were still pretty stunned and no one protested when Lily decided to carry on and hope for a better answer.*

"Probably wondering if he's concocting some mad scheme with you," Lily smirked.

"He might have been having a flashback to be honest," James agreed with a laugh.

'Wish he was joking' Sirius noted sourly, wanting very much to grumble about how Snape shouldn't have shown up for hours so these two had a better chance to talk, or not at all preferably.

"Well I obviously know what it is," Remus observed quirking a brow in surprise.

"Wish you did now," James frowned.

"The fact that you two are being so polite to each other honestly scares me," Sirius grumbled.

"I'm just waiting for Harry to ask what's going on," Lily sighed.

"I don't like any look from him," James agreed, his eyes still narrowed suspiciously. Snape wouldn't do anything too bad to Remus in reaction to that Boggart mess, and Remus clearly wasn't bothered by the interaction in the future. Then again, Harry wasn't the best eyes to go on for that, as he might not have even noticed Remus' tells.

"Be a little more scared if he was smiling," Sirius snapped.

"But what is it?" Lily huffed, her eyes narrowed in high agitation that she didn't know the answer to that, though she couldn't help a sneaking suspicion of something it could be.

"Wish I knew," Remus answered with a shrug.

"I don't like this," James and Sirius said in sync, still frowning in concern that Snape might be trying to get some sort of payback at Remus for that boggart stunt. Then again, Remus didn't seem very concerned for this, in fact if they were hearing this right he seemed rather grateful to Snape for whatever that potion was. It was driving them all crazy none of them could figure it out.

Sirius and James exchanged wide-eyed looks at that. 'Off-color' was a kind of inside joke that Remus said when he wasn't feeling well around the full moon, and the 'many wizards aren't up to making it' bit sort of made it seem like it might be about the same thing. Had a potion actually been discovered to help with his lycanthropy? If so, then this was a miracle as much as it was mind-blowing. Neither voiced their suspicions though, wondering if it would give Remus false hope.

"Can't blame you on that one," Sirius agreed, "I wouldn't trust him not to poison me any farther than I could throw him."

"He wouldn't do something like that right under Dumbledore's nose," Lily said at once, and all of the boys noted she had just so phrased that in the way she hadn't exactly said he wouldn't poison Remus. It was far from reassuring, even if it did mean she really wasn't exactly in Snape's corner anymore.

"Which is not a surprise to me, I can assure you," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Glad Harry's so trusting of his potions teacher, really makes me feel all warm and fuzzy," James said with only mild amusement, still stuck on the potion itself.

Then they all pulled a face remarkably close to how Remus had looked finishing off that potion, Harry noted, but didn't need to ask why. He knew they were just as disappointed as he was that their little talk was clearly over, and they actually walked out with more questions than answers.

"Ominous," James drew the word out, still giving the book a significant and haughty look.

"Please, do anything but tell him what all you did," Lily sighed without any hope.

"Well Harry's not helping anything," Remus grumbled.

"And Ron and Hermione clearly weren't pulling any punches," Sirius winced.

"That would have been a fun sight to see," James chuckled, remembering sneaking into there all the time just to watch who came and went.

"Oh yeah, he really sat around and hit the books," Sirius rolled his eyes. "Honestly, doesn't Hermione know him at all?"

"That's actually a fair question as of right now," Sirius agreed sagely.

Remus rolled his eyes at him, stating in as sane a voice as he could muster, "despite my friends, I actually like to argue that from time to time." Even his own face though was showing his misgivings at this fact currently.

"Don't think Harry could really have done much to stop him," James frowned, "or known to do otherwise."

"I still kind of agree with Hermione," Lily said thoughtfully, "Snape's not so stupid to do that in front of someone like Harry, even if he didn't understand what was going on."

"If you're all done deciding whether I'm going to die or not," Remus pleasantly mocked Harry, the pair exchanging amused looks.

James and Sirius frowned, not finding that funny in the least. They'd only just found out he was actually going to survive, the thought of him being killed right now made them want to lash out at anything even slightly threatening. Whether they were right in their guess or not, they still didn't trust Snape to do a damned thing for Remus for any reason.

"I'll admit, I do find that rather comforting," James nodded in agreement, suddenly putting the date with the act and remembering all over again Harry's spectacular bad luck with this particular holiday. If something bad was going to happen to Remus, he wouldn't even be surprised if it had happened on this day.

"Please tell me you are exaggerating," Sirius groaned, "cause otherwise, that is creepy."

"Glad to see they still think that's funny," Harry said, trying to move on to lighter topics, and ignoring the mounting feeling he'd had earlier. He was still so sure something did happen today, but it clearly didn't involve Remus and Snape, so what could he be thinking of?

"That joke is still not funny," all three boys on the couch snapped, thinking this kid really needed to get a grip, or at least a new book of jokes.

"Did McGonagall change the password without telling anyone?" Lily asked in confusion.

"She's only ever done that to us, not the whole house," James disagreed with a frown in place.

Harry was starting to get fidgety again, instinctively knowing something bad was about to happen, and trying his hardest to keep that feeling suppressed.

"Yes, because that will make them move out of the way so much faster," Sirius rolled his eyes, thinking that even if their unlikely guess was right; Percy would know the new password at least.

"What, why, what happened?" The boys demanded at once.

Lily desperately wanted to pause and bite at her lip again, fearing that anything that made Percy upset couldn't be good, but read on quickly anyways for her answer.

James was blinking spastically like someone had just shined a bright light in his eye, while Sirius' mouth was hanging open in shock. Remus and Harry leaned forward, not wanting anyone to pause and try to guess what had happened, but encouraging Lily to keep going and try to get an answer already.

James was getting jittery all over, and keeping a paternal eye on Harry as he watched him continually rub at his temple, a sure sign something important was fixing to happen. Who, or what, on earth would have attacked that painting?

"Found the other person, besides the Bloody Baron, who Peeves won't mess with," Sirius said, but was ignored by the others.

"Running from what?" Remus muttered, though not loud enough Lily stopped to acknowledge it.

The book slipped out of Lily's numb hands and landed on the floor with a thunk.

* * *

*I would just like to note before anyone says anything, in chapter eighteen Remus says that the invention of the Wolfsbane potion is 'very recent' which makes me think that it possibly wasn't even discovered until after the events of their deaths. So no, they really don't have any idea what Remus drank.

You can all yell and scream at me all you want, but I wanted to end it there for the dramatics… don't worry you'll get your reactions in the next chapter. Love this chapter, it's a personal favorite of mine watching Remus and Harry interact…heh hope you enjoyed and don't want to kill me now.


	9. GRIM DEFEAT

"Okay," James said, drawing the word far out past its normal syllable count as he glanced carefully between the book and his best friend. "At least now we know Sirius really is at Hogwarts," he finished with a mutter.

"Er, Sirius," Remus said cautiously when the silence just kept dragging on and they just kept staring at him like he would have a completely normal explanation for this. "No offense mate, but I'm honestly wondering if you hadn't really lost your mind on that one."

Sirius was mouthing wordlessly, his eyes so round his friends were wondering if they weren't just going to completely fall out of his head.

"Don't suppose it just has something to do with his low impulse control?" Lily offered weakly. "He finally made his way there and was just that eager to see Harry?"

"With a knife?" Harry reminded. Harry couldn't help but shift his weight around uncomfortably as he continued eyeing Sirius. Remus might have meant it as a joke, but Harry really was starting to have this feeling like there was some darker, unknown reason Sirius was trying to get into Gryffindor tower... but what? It had to be because of him, what other motive would he have for going in there? But something just didn't feel right, and as always his mind was unhelpful as ever in giving him a reason why.

The others were trying, their minds spinning in every direction possible for this to seem logical, for any kind of motive that didn't make their skin crawl, but they were all coming up with a blank on this one. At least four of them were, Sirius looked like he'd completely shut down and wasn't going to be processing anything anytime soon.

James got uneasily to his feet and walked over to pick up the book, checking his chapter before walking back over and smacking Sirius with it.

"Ouch!" Sirius yelped in shock, rubbing at the spot on his arm, and coming out of whatever trance he'd clearly been in. "What was that for?"

"Felt like someone should for that stupid stunt," James said with an air of carelessness, while he was still keeping a very protective eye on his friend, "got any ideas why you did?"

Sirius shook his head miserably from side to side, sighing deeply before saying, "I don't know, maybe Lily's got something in saying I was just really impatient to see Harry, and I had the knife for protection? I've obviously not got my wand anymore."

"See, I don't know about that," Remus argued back with a frown in place. "It would have been much easier to set up something with me, then we could both talk to Harry at the same time. Even you're not so mad as to think this was a good idea Padfoot."

"Maybe now I'm not," Sirius grumbled, eyeing the ceiling carefully and not looking at anyone.

James and Remus exchanged heartbroken looks, while to be perfectly honest Lily couldn't really come up with a way to argue that point.

Then James grit his teeth in frustration, and made to swing at Sirius again. This time he was paying attention enough to duck, then glared daggers at his best friend. "Why do you keep trying to hit me?"

"Because you're being an idiot," James snapped, and Sirius felt like leaning back at the fiery glare he was now receiving. "I don't want anyone to ever say that again, least of all you. I'm positive you must have a reason for this, and you will get your chance to talk to Harry by the end of the year and explain it." With that he turned to his chapter and began reading; not leaving any room for argument. Remus looked happy that the subject was being changed, agreeing with James all the way, but Harry and Lily exchanged uneasy looks.

Lily couldn't help but wonder if her husband wasn't in denial about this matter. Something wasn't adding up with this, and though neither of them had an idea of what, they were both thinking it might have a little more to do with something other than Harry. Lily just couldn't help but think that, unless Azkaban really had driven Sirius mad, what other explanation could it be?

"Interesting little slumber party," Remus muttered, still keeping a worried eye on Sirius. James words hadn't seemed to be much comfort to him, and he was still rubbing absentmindedly on where he had now been whacked twice, and looked as if he was only half paying attention.

"Course he was," Harry rolled his eyes, now continuously throwing worried glances over at Sirius, they had all noticed he didn't seem to have as much confidence as James did.

"Glad he remembers the little things," Lily chuckled without any real humor.

"Where did they all come from?" Harry yelped in shock, his mind boggling at the idea of summoning so many things at once.

"I'm fairly confident they keep a private store of those somewhere in the castle," Remus explained, "for emergencies like this."

Harry still found this a pretty big feat, but didn't say anymore.

"He is such a killjoy," James smirked, trying his very best to put a sense of normalcy back into his tone that no one actually bought.

"Absolutely not," Remus said at once, punctuating that with a roll of his eyes to show how ridiculous he thought that was.

James suddenly brightened all the more, a real smile coming across his face as he began laughing.

"I don't see why that's funny," Lily scowled at him, wondering if James wasn't joining Sirius in a spot of madness now.

"I was just thinking that Hermione might be wrong on that one," James disagreed, "and that Sirius was trying to get a bit of irony owed to him on this particular night. All that rubbish-" no one needed to ask why he couldn't actually say the words 'we died' and had instead deflected to that, "on Halloween, so Sirius wanted to make an impression."

Lily's eyes might have brightened with understanding, but she didn't look any more convinced.

Remus was shaking his head from side to side, not looking any more convinced but a little more indulgent as he replied, "think that's giving him a little too much credit mate. Can't imagine Sirius thinking in that kind of poeticness."

"Hello, I am sitting right here," Sirius sniffed, allowing a genuine smile to appear as he was easily able to focus on this simple thing, his friends picking on him. The others were relieved to see him get some sense of normalcy back about him, which made James feel all the worse when he realized no one was going to comment further and he had to simply turn right back to this.

"Perfect time to try and sneak in and wait out for Harry to be alone," Remus reminded Sirius quietly. Sure that plan had some major holes, like he obviously hadn't snooped out and found the password for one; but Sirius could turn into a dog and hide under the bed for just this opportunity. No it wasn't ideal, it would make more sense for him and Sirius to work out something far better...but perhaps Sirius had grown impatient and gone ahead without him? It wouldn't be the first time Sirius had disregarded his advice on something because he was so impatient, though he would have liked to think on something like this he could have gotten through his friends thick skull... Remus sighed when he realized he just kept creating more questions rather than a solution.

Sirius grumbled something about he still didn't think he was that deranged, but quietly enough he didn't think either of his friends really understood what he meant.

"That's something I am still genuinely curious about," Lily said briskly, trying to keep her suspicions about Sirius mind state out of her voice. She wasn't sure how good a job she did, since James kind of gave her a dirty look anyways, but Sirius distracted them by saying "I've still got no idea. I really have been thinking about that, and all I can come up with is that I must learn something new within the next year."

"That isn't public knowledge, and that Dumbledore doesn't know and has proofed against, and the rest of the wizarding world hasn't figured out?" Remus asked in disbelief.

They were all genuinely puzzled, only one thing coming to mind in that Sirius was an animagus. That qualified under all of those questions, but what did that have to do with getting past dementors? Sirius did know all of the secret entrances in and out of the school, so if he did waltz right past the guards as a dog and use one of those, was it doable? That didn't answer one of their original questions, of why he hadn't simply done this moments after he'd been taken to Azkaban, why wait all this time? Of course, as far as any of them knew, this hadn't ever been studied; did dementors have an effect on animals? Was it the same basic principle as werewolf bites didn't affect an animal, just humans?

Harry was nearly bouncing in his seat when James voiced all of this, which meant they must be on the right track, he didn't normally show this much excitement when they weren't. By the time they had circled through every bit of possibilities on this subject, they were all practically beaming at having figured out something even this minor. It certainly made them all feel better than the other tons of questions they had about the situation that just kept getting worse.

"Of course I do, most any adult wizard does," Sirius rolled his eyes. Even finding out something as minor as how he had gotten himself past the dementors finally seemed to have lifted Sirius' mood tenfold, bringing back his more boisterous and rather pompous nature.

He looked to be in such a good mood again, no one bothered to point out to him he most likely didn't have a wand, and the obvious part where he can't apparate inside the actual school; since Sirius most likely knew both of these anyways and was just answering the rhetorical question.

"Actually not that far off," James smirked, now feeling like rubbing it in Lily's face that they most likely hadn't registered and this was how Sirius was getting around. After all, if they had, then surely they would have put out an alert on Sirius' dog form as well as his human picture.

Lily properly acknowledged his smug tone by sticking her tongue at him, having come to much the same conclusions.

"And we've already explained why that wouldn't work," Remus shrugged, "not only that, but dementors could sense him even if I did invite him on the premises, so that wouldn't work all the more."

"Only one who's memorized it," James smirked.

"Well I very much hope it impresses you," Sirius smirked.

"I doubt he actually knows all of them," James scoffed, "otherwise they'd be boarded up and blocked off from all students."

Lily couldn't help but wonder if perhaps they were. Harry certainly hadn't found any out of the school, but perhaps her son wasn't the best way to argue that point. The one thing she could say for her son was that he really didn't go out of his way to find trouble like that, unlike his father on that one.

"Please," Remus scoffed, "as if anyone could sleep with this kind of news going around." If he didn't think it would inflate his friends ego another few degrees, he might have even pointed out just how much of an accomplishment this really was, sneaking into Hogwarts in this manner. Side effects and actual reasons for him doing this aside.

"Not as Siriusly as I could have," Sirius said quickly, taking the absent minded nudge he received from James with a happy grin this time. He was going to soak in this pleasurable mood for as long as he could, knowing by now he shouldn't count on it to last long this time.

"That sounds like fun honestly," Lily grinned, "I think we really should go camping some time."

"I'll keep that in mind," James acknowledged.

Harry looked horrified at the thought. He had no idea why his mother's innocent suggestion would give him a whomping smack, his first instinct to say he wanted nothing of the sort, but something about him, Hermione, Ron, and the word camping wasn't being taken lightly inside of him. He didn't say any of this though, because as always it came with that nuisance of a feeling that it came with memories he had no business prying into so early.

Despite the confidence James had that Sirius really wouldn't have stuck around and gotten back out of there, he also couldn't help the slight relief he felt at the headmaster's reappearance. Surely if Sirius had been caught, Dumbledore wouldn't have come back, but would be tied up for hours dealing with the ministry and what have you because of it.

"I think he just needs to keep his girlfriend at his hip, see that 'lighter side of him' we still haven't seen," Remus muttered into Sirius' ear, making Sirius begin snickering again.

"Convenient," Lily rolled her eyes, though to be honest this time she really thought that might have just been a lucky break. Of all the students scattered in the great hall, there was no way they could have possibly noticed those three in particular when they were talking. Even then, it wasn't out of the realm of possibilities that Percy would be cycling near his brother.

This time the other four couldn't help but joining James in the relief at this confirmation Sirius really hadn't been recaptured.

Sirius grimaced and pushed his hand through his hair in frustration, truly bothered he had clearly hurt the Fat Lady's painting so much it couldn't just be mended quickly, but James distracted him easily enough by asking "Wonder who they got to do the job?"

There were several memorable portraits some of them suggested, Harry's favorite being Remus who offered they might have even used one of the old Headmaster's ones from Dumbledore's office, but then James really did have to keep reading to get his answer.

Sirius couldn't help but bite at his lip, torn between anger at himself for this act, and confusion as to why he seemed so desperate to get in as really; seeing Harry shouldn't have caused this much of a forceful reaction. Yes, he'd be going crazy wanting to see his Godson, but then he grimaced at his mind's choice of words as he was once again very forcefully questioning himself if he truly had gone...well crazy.

Remus and James weren't having it, refusing to let him dwell on this, so Remus offered him back the baby who Sirius took happily, and James made the comment, "I think she owes you a thanks to be honest. How often does she get to travel the castle like this?"

Harry released a surprised snort of laughter at that, only Lily still look perturbed as her thoughts had been paralleling Sirius' and she didn't seem able to shake it off quite as easily. While no she didn't really think he'd do Harry harm, it still was distressing to even consider what had become of Sirius, and not thinking about it wasn't going to make it any easier if she happened to be right. Then she sighed as she focused back in on James, also recognizing dwelling on it wasn't going to make the problem better either.

"Oh great, just bloody perfect, I really wanted him to come around and get his opinion on the matter. Would have kept me dwelling all day if we didn't hear his stupid-" Sirius cut himself off by blowing a loud raspberry in baby Harry's face, causing great peals of laughter from all of them at that sudden random act.

"See, even Dumbledore still has that kind of faith in you," James smirked.

"Would honestly kind of like to hear that," Remus chuckled.

Sirius didn't seem to find that quit so funny, having come to the sudden realization that even Dumbledore probably thought he'd committed that terrible crime, and finding it quite depressing his old headmaster thought that of him. McGonagall would as well, Merlin anyone he once knew would think the worst of him now... except Remus of course. He sighed, refusing to allow his mind to linger on this depressing realization, taking a comfort in that one small fact his friend still would have stood by him, no matter how little influence he could have offered because of his status.

"He would be upset you obviously got the better of everyone in that castle," James cackled.

"Well then you should have had this out of earshot, like oh I don't know, in one of your offices," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Hope he does, as I'd really like to hear this," Sirius said honestly, taking any pleasure in this old bat getting told off.

"I see what he's on about," James rolled his eyes.

"While he's most likely not wrong-" Remus shrugged, but Sirius finished for him, "like I need anyone's help."

"Huh," the others muttered, Dumbledore phrasing it this way actually managed to spring a few questions to mind. Was Dumbledore implying he didn't think Remus would help him, in which case Remus would have had to lie and fool the headmaster about this; or did Dumbledore possibly know something? That Sirius was innocent every person in this room still believed, could it be possible Dumbledore still believed it too, and hadn't been able to do anything about it during the trial, and was now trying to possibly help out Sirius himself.

Harry in particular didn't really think that, and it also turned his mind into an even darker train of thought, could he be saying that because Dumbledore really thought Remus wouldn't help Sirius? Why though, what could make the headmaster think this? Harry was getting a very sticky feeling deep inside him, that emptiness was rearing its ugly head when his mind was trying to disagree with his gut on this matter.

James couldn't help but hesitate before he kept reading this time, torn between wanting to question this further, and afraid of what answers might crop up. After exchanging a look with Remus, and the silence continued to drag on from the others, he decided to leave that one be for a time.

"Thank Merlin for that," Lily said in relief.

Sirius couldn't help a surprised snort of laughter, he honestly kept forgetting these kids in the book weren't privy to the knowledge they were half the time. It was more than obvious to them, but of course even Harry wouldn't have known at the time Remus was obviously who they meant. Then that humor dried up slightly, just a tad of resentment taking its place as he remembered all over again Harry really should have known that.

Sirius couldn't help but grimace at that, having always enjoyed attention in his youth, and finding that mirrored back now the worst form of mockery.

"I threatened to turn you into a dandelion one time," Lily remembered fondly.

That gave them all a soft moment of amusement again, Harry in particular as he asked, "and why was that?"

"I caught him flirting with one of my friends, the day after he'd broken up with another girl," Lily shrugged, "told him to get lost or I'd turn him from a hound dog to a dandelion. Seemed cleverer at the time than it does now."

"I took the threat for what it was though," Sirius shrugged, not looking any kind of abashed at this little retelling, "wouldn't have been the first time Lily'd cursed me for much less."

"Wow," Remus chuckled in amusement, "didn't see that one coming."

"This ought to be fun to watch," James agreed mildly.

Harry rolled his eyes, already getting a faint feeling of more agitation then humor, but didn't argue the point.

"Can he do that?" Lily frowned, "Thought only McGonagall could do that."

"Probably gave him permission, after my little stunt," Sirius reminded her, with just a touch of bitterness complimenting that.

"Brave or suicidal," Sirius piped up again, and when Remus made to smack him again for that dark humor, Sirius quickly reminded, "thought I was allowed to make jokes about that."

Remus sneered at him, still not finding that the least bit funny, but Merlin if it made him feel better who was he to argue?

"Oh crap," James groaned, planting his face in the pages for a moment to collect himself at this amount of absurdity all over again. He still found it laughable at best of anyone thinking Sirius could do Harry real harm, but he obviously couldn't convince anyone of that in this future, and it was pointless to grumble on the matter now when Sirius was trying too hard not to let himself stay down on this matter, so he blasted through this part as fast as he could.

"Can't deny I adore the description anyway," Sirius huffed to himself.

Remus rolled his eyes, not finding it any more amusing his using the dog jokes then his own name, and dearly wishing he hadn't given up the baby now so that he had more a reason to swing at him.

"Only person that could refer to is the Dursleys," Harry offered, trying his own attempt at humor, "then I can't imagine I'd be too sorry."

That did give them all a chance to give a laugh, albeit a dark one as they half wished that were true anyways.

Sirius opened his mouth to say that same joke again, but Remus took the opportunity to poke him in the jaw, smirking as he scolded, "not twice in the same chapter, please save my sanity from that."

Sirius rolled his eyes at him, telling his friend now he was being a killjoy, and James took that distraction to read out the ridiculous sentence

"Oh yeah, you could just hear the surprise in Harry," Lily rolled her eyes, wanting to laugh all over again as even she wouldn't have openly admitted to eavesdropping like Harry had done twice now.

"She what!" James cried in outrage, now matching the expression that someone had just told him someone had been killed.

"Couldn't they just ask someone to oversee the practice if they're that worried," Remus scowled, knowing he'd personally volunteer in a heartbeat.

"She can't do that," Sirius spluttered in disgust. "What the bloody hell do they think I'm going to do, get onto the pitch and chuck that knife at him?"

"Well, yes it seems," Lily frowned over at him when James and Remus scowled at him for that stupid comment.

Sirius matched her expression, but James refused to let them really start arguing and began reading again swiftly, dearly wishing Harry would do something to make her see sense!

"Well, she isn't actually kicking him off the team," Remus said slowly, frown still in place, but this wasn't as bad as he'd originally thought. "I guess it wouldn't be too bad if you just couldn't practice with the team, but could still play in the games."

"I'd still go crazy," Harry disagreed, "Quidditch was the best stress relief I had, no way do I want that taken away."

"Thank you," all the boys breathed in relief. Lily rolled her eyes, she personally wouldn't have felt too bad if Harry hadn't been able to play anymore since the moment he'd started playing he'd yet to be able to go one game without her heart wanting to leap out of its chest, but she wasn't going to begrudge Harry this getaway either.

"Bollocks," Sirius scowled when he realized this was most likely going to be the chapter that held said match.

James gave him a pitying look, but before he could even open his mouth to offer Sirius turned his attention resolutely back to the baby, silently answering before he could offer. Sirius would keep his word, he'd wait until Harry's final year to openly demand his due Quidditch match, but it certainly was frustrating this just kept skipping over him.

James considered for a moment still asking, Sirius might have silently answered but he'd been dealing with so much lately he might have forced him to read it just to put a real smile back in place, but then Remus subtly shook his head and pointed out the now dozing child. If James traded now, baby Harry would fully wake up again, and they may as well give the kid his nap while he could.

James shrugged and decided to go on. Harry watched all of this with high interest, greatly enjoying the silent conversation that had just taken place, and feeling a depressing realization all over again when he recognized he'd never truly see this in his own time.

"Those crappy little tarts," James said at once.

"Is Malfoy still faking that injury," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Sadly yes," Harry sighed, that remembered issue making its reappearance. "How come Madam Pomfrey couldn't prove that he wasn't faking this?" He added on, as it was obvious to anyone as far as he was concerned.

James did not look pleased as he worked out, "As it wasn't technically school related, he still had an arm to do his homework and such, I suppose Wood couldn't have gotten this to happen. He had no proof, and so long as Hufflepuff agreed to the switch it wasn't technically forfeiting."

"What's the big difference?" Lily asked curiously, as all the boys were clearly taking a great offense to this. Lily certainly found it sad that these students were still playing up this, but she could tell there was something else about this.

Sirius was more than happy to explain, all the while using a huffy tone at these little jerks, "Every team has a different style of playing. So giving such short notice that the team won't be playing means they've been practicing a completely different regiment then they would have against the other team."

Lily couldn't help but recognize that there clearly was much more thought and skill in this sport then she normally thought, but simply nodded in understanding.

"Like it will make a difference when they still play," James spat. "Gryffindor's team will still smoke the field with these backhanded twats."

Harry suddenly released a furious yelp of pain, clasping his hand to his forehead like he'd just been scalded. The others startled at once, looking to him with mounting worry, but Harry was determinedly already putting himself under control, ignoring the painful build up that name had caused and blinking the white spots out of his eyes to glance around and see their fearful looks. He gave them a sheepish smile, but didn't offer an apology this time, knowing by now how that would be received, and instead explained the feeling that had accompanied the flash. "Another name I'm sure I know. It is definitely significant to me," then he paused and cocked his head to the side as he tried to consider and absorb all he could from that already faded feeling without straining himself. He shrugged, recognizing he had nothing else to offer on this.

The rest of them exchanged curious looks, that had hardly explained why Harry felt so strongly about this student, but knew better than to press him for a more direct answer.

James rolled his eyes, not understanding that attitude one bit about a rival team, but read curiously.

"Ah," Lily smirked.

"Would recommend against dating someone on a different house team," Remus chuckled, "but to each their own."

"Did I detect a hint of some jealousy in that?" Sirius asked with interest.

"Wouldn't surprise me," James shrugged, not nearly as curious about these boys love life, and far more concerned about what kind of player this Diggory was.

"Hope he doesn't let them get too over confident," James noted, quirking a brow in surprise, "letting them get cocky could cost them later."

"Wish someone had told you that sooner," Lily snipped at him, and James gave her an indulgent smile for that.

"Dang, bit of an overreaction with the shouting," Sirius winced.

"Might I remind you, this is the same boy who said, 'get the snitch or die trying'" Lily rolled her eyes, "I don't think anything's an overreaction to this boy about this game."

"Mum," Harry groaned, "I told you, he didn't really mean that."

Lily shrugged, she still wasn't taking that back.

"Glad I wasn't the only one thinking it," Sirius smirked, though to be honest he did agree with Oliver as well. He would love more than anything to hear about Harry getting the Cup, it would probably make up for any awful feelings he had about this year.

"Oh come on!" Sirius cried in outrage, receiving two very sharp pokes from both sides of him, making him squirm slightly and nearly waking up the infant. Both boys looked slightly repentant, and Sirius began grumbling if they didn't stop it he was going to move to the fireplace again. James didn't take the threat, well seriously, but he did stop attempting to smother his friend; while he was holding his son anyways.

"Wish they would just cancel the match, and wait until this little brat stops faking his injury," Lily sighed.

"Not going to happen," James shook his head, "last year was an anomaly, Quidditch isn't usually cancelled for anything, since in the professional leagues Quidditch really isn't cancelled for anything."

"Someone needs to show that kid a real injury," Sirius scowled.

"Well then, it's a good thing you have such an understanding professor," James snickered.

Remus rolled his eyes indulgently, privately thinking he would end up defending himself if his future self did give Harry a warning for that, then he went slightly cross-eyed, still finding it just a little weird he was thinking of himself in the future tense at all like this.

"Glad he took the hint," Lily grumbled.

"Say what?" They all frowned, looking genuinely upset and confused at this.

Then Remus blinked in understanding, asking, "don't suppose you know how close to a full moon it was Harry?"

Harry thought about it for a moment before shrugging, admitting he really had no idea as he didn't keep an eye on that type of thing.

James was still frowning as he said, "yes alright, so you wouldn't be feeling too good if that's it, but Snape! No other teacher could have covered for you!"

"I'm fairly sure I didn't get to pick my replacement," Remus offered.

Sirius was just a little too distracted to put his opinion on this, thinking back to that potion and what he'd thought it was. If Remus was still this sick around the full moon, had they been wrong, and this had nothing to do with his lycanthropy? He was still frowning, very unhappy that he might have been wrong on that guess, but also at least a bit happy he'd never voiced this theory, since they would have been right and it would have given false hopes to Remus.

Harry was still scowling though, grumbling that, "of all our rotten luck. We'd heard rumors a few times by now that Remus had missed some of his classes because he was sick all the time, but the twins got Sprout for a cover."

They all agreed it was a real misfortune the schedule had worked out like that, but Remus had been right, it wasn't like it had been planned.

Remus frowned, since he knew Harry wasn't always late he found that a far harsher punishment then it was called for, but this was Snape, so there wasn't any point in saying this.

"I'm touched," Remus smiled indulgently at Harry, who instantly smiled right back. He didn't need to know the missing link he hadn't then to always know he'd rather have Remus then Snape any day of the year.

"Sadistic little bastard, finding that funny," Sirius scowled.

Lily gave him a rather ugly look, though mostly for his saying that while holding her son.

This time James, Sirius, and Harry all said something rather foul for that implied tone, even Lily couldn't help a cheeky response for his being all the more unprofessional in front of the students like that.

Remus was just warmed and slightly amused at their defense of him.

"Maybe if you did more to earn their respect, they'd listen to you," Remus snarked, causing James and Sirius to exchange triumphant smiles, very much wishing Remus would really say something like that to Snape soon.

"I doubt that," James scowled, knowing Remus was usually a pretty organized person and would think to do something like this.

"Most likely, you just didn't look for one," Sirius agreed with a growl.

"He could have left you a whole damned book worth of notes and you'd still complain," Harry huffed.

Lily gave a disapproving look at her son, clearly thinking these boys were rubbing off on Harry since this was the first time he'd said something like this, but she couldn't disagree either.

This time Remus really couldn't help but blush, the combined affection from this class and his family both unexpected and more warming than he would have seen coming.

James and Sirius were unsurprised, James continued in a rather pompous tone of voice as if he'd just received the compliment himself he was so happy for his friend.

Sirius rolled his eyes, knowing he'd have to see that to believe it. While he considered Snivellus no one to underestimate during school, he still found it hard to find him 'menacing'.

"And I might agree with you," Remus frowned, "if they'd had a competent teacher the past two years."

"I was fixing to have heart failure," Sirius told him with a straight face, "watching you agree with him like that.

Remus rolled his eyes indulgently as he explained, "I'll bet that Dumbledore had told me of the past two years, so I haven't been surprised one bit what you've been going over."

"Typical," James gave a long suffering sigh, before doing a double take at the next word, werewolves.

"Why that-" Lily then proceeded to call him something that would have made her go red in the face on a normal day. The boys hardly noticed, as their language wasn't much better. What Snape was doing right then was absolutely horrible, and he had no right whatsoever!

Remus went from giddy pleasure he had clearly been handling his dream job like a glove, to shame and fear that he very well might get kicked out of it before the first term was up. If even one student figured it out, mayhem was going to explode inside the castle, owls from parents were going to start arriving...Merlin he might even be arrested. No, surely he was just being paranoid, Dumbledore wouldn't have hired him if it could get that bad... right?

After being the last one to stop his verbal abuse, Sirius finally found some small words of comfort, "look at it this way, students have to learn this every year, and no one figured it out while you were at school. Surely it won't be any different now."

Lily wanted to disagree, saying it was slightly different from a random student to a more prominent teacher, but she refused to be the one to drain what little color had just returned to Remus' face; clearly he'd taken Sirius' comfort to heart.

James was still gritting his teeth so hard he wondered if it was going to crack his skull, Sirius might be right but it didn't excuse this slimeballs actions, but after swallowing a bit of bile forcefully read.

"Guess I'm not too surprised," Remus sighed, not looking nearly as amused as he tried to put into his tone, "Hermione would read ahead and know this."

"Yes, because he'd just go out of his way to do that," Sirius growled.

Remus couldn't help but wince, almost happy now that he thought about it, that Snape had decided to take this lesson. Twisted as his reasons were, it was still slightly better than having to do this himself. He chose not to say that aloud though, knowing it wouldn't be received well.

"Behind?" James scowled. "I'd like to see how many of your students can pass a simple potion, considering how much they all hate you I wouldn't be half surprised if they failed on purpose."

Harry scowled so badly at the book, he actually made as if to twitch for his wand that time.

"That man has no bounds," Lily yelped in outrage, "he asked a question and then insults her! I can't believe I'm even surprised anymore, after the way he's been treating Neville," she trailed off into foul mutterings, but the other boys didn't have nearly the same restraint. They continued gripping about him for a few more minutes until it started getting loud enough the baby started squirming again.

James sighed, but relented they couldn't continue yelling forever, so pressed on.

"And that's why I adore Ron," Lily smiled fondly before Sirius could make a joke about how she'd mimicked him. "Very happy someone said that to him."

James looked for a moment as if he might get up and kiss his wife for that one, having only been a beat away from saying something similar, while the other boys were nodding in fervent agreement.

This thankfully didn't reignite the attitude, though it hardly lessened it. The only reason they weren't doing a bit more than grumbling was because they could hardly argue that point, though they each found it personally loathsome at the implied threat he'd just made to a student.

"What, did the student simply say East Asia and that just wasn't specific enough for you?" James scowled.

"I'm finding it more of a miracle every day anybody ever passed his courses," Sirius snarled.

"He shouldn't even be allowed to assign homework while he's subbing," Harry huffed.

Remus personally felt he might have argued that point, for any other teacher, but didn't find it worth it for this pompous git.

"Two rolls of parchment?" Lily balked. "They may as well just copyright the whole chapter on them."

"He may as well simply write on the board what he's wanting them to figure out!" James snarled.

"Please Remus, please drag your arse out of bed and make it to that class," Sirius groaned.

Remus gave his friend a pitying look, though he couldn't deny he hoped so himself.*

"I swear he'd mock Dumbledore himself he's so bitter about not getting this job," James grumbled.

"Impressed they even have that self-restraint," Sirius huffed.

"Even knowing the answer, this is still stupid," Harry scowled.

"Actually not," Remus disagreed, then he blinked when he realized Harry actually didn't know the complete reason. Harry now thought Snape hated him for their childhood grudge they had told Harry about, but they had actually left something out when briefly telling Harry a bit about their time during school. No one had brought up the night that Snape had figured out he was a werewolf. Harry didn't seem to be questioning this now, and Remus swallowed hard before asking hesitantly, "ah Harry, why aren't you more surprised Severus knows about me?"

Harry just shrugged as he said, "thought all the teachers would know, none of them seem to be that confused as to why you're sick."

James and Sirius exchanged uneasy looks when they realized what Remus was considering telling Harry, then Sirius nudged Remus hard, not particularly wanting that story to come to his ears right now. Yes Harry right now still didn't really think the worst of Sirius like he did back when he was thirteen, but he'd still rather go as long as possible without that little story coming up.

Remus wasn't going to argue the point, so James took the silent opportunity to keep going.

"Trust us Hermione, we all do," Lily sighed.

"What did he say?" Sirius asked, far too amused in Lily's opinion.

Harry told them, which made Lily do a double take that he knew that word, but James chuckled in complete agreement and moved on anyways.

Most of them muttered either 'ouch' or 'ew' for that particular punishment.

"Now why didn't I think of that," Sirius cried, shifting the baby carefully into one arm so he could pop himself on the forehead for the theatrics, causing at least Harry to laugh.

"I've never known Peeves to get into the dorms," Lily startled.

"We've let him in from time to time as personal vengeance," Remus shrugged, more than happy at this change of subject. "The twins might have done the same for some pregame jitters release."

"He's a lovely chap really," James snickered.

"Dang," Sirius drew the word out, now grimacing in pity.

"That cat really does seem to have it out for Scabbers in particular," Lily winced.

Harry gave his mom a curious look, very much wondering why his gut's first reaction was to agree with his mother's obvious joke. Cats didn't 'have it out' for any other particular animal...right?

"Never met a pet with a grudge" Remus chuckled without any amusement.

"Well dang, this just all kinds of sucks," Sirius grimaced.

"Jeez, I think Hermione should put a leash on this cat," James scowled.

"We'll be lucky if we go till the end of the year without another accident like last time," Sirius agreed.

"Admire the girl's pep anyways," Remus smiled.

"Even if this sounds like quite a bit more than 'a bit of rain,'" Lily smirked.

"You just wait you pompous, arrogant little thing," James sneered, "you've got four more years of this game, and I'll bet the next time you do have to play Harry the weather's going to be just as bad, and Harry's still going to sweep you seven ways."

Harry couldn't help but grin at his dad for the confidence, allowing him to ignore a building sense of unease about this game. He was trying very hard to ignore this, not wanting yet another game to be ruined again.

"Wow, poor kid," Sirius said in sympathy.

Lily still couldn't help but feel he was taking this a little too seriously, but she also recognized that there wasn't much she could do but continue hoping nothing to bad happened during this game. One quick glance at Harry didn't help those spirits.

"No one's still showed you that charm," James scowled at Harry's team mates. Sure it didn't say anyone else wore glasses, but surely someone would have taken the time to show Harry this.

Harry just shrugged, admitting that no, no one had told him about this so he'd not known to do it.

"Nicer than some other teams, I assure you," Remus snickered.

James couldn't help the little swell of happiness that reading this caused him, absolutely positive that nothing could go wrong during this game.

All five of them were frowning at this, knowing the game was hardly any fun in these conditions. James was still personally affronted someone, like himself, hadn't been able to give Harry some simple advice like blocking the rain from his glasses, but he refused to let his mood stay dampened and so read on with forced chipper.

"What did you even have to dry them on," Sirius rolled his eyes, "sounds like everything on you was soaked."

Harry nodded, admitting he hadn't exactly done a good job and had in fact made his glasses even wetter.

"Thank Merlin for Hermione," James smirked.

"High time someone thought to give you that spell," Sirius agreed.

Harry nodded to himself, now determined to commit that spell to memory for future use.

"I'm sure that would have been a sight," Remus said, not even bothering to hide a light laugh at this obvious joke.

All of them released surprised bursts of laughter at this. Even Lily had to admit, loco or not, Sirius would certainly not have sat by when he found out Harry was on the Quidditch team and would swim across an ocean just to see this for himself. Harry went from startled at realizing this to amusement himself, further burying that nuisance of a feeling that something really bad was about to happen. Surely he was just remembering the feelings of having to play in such weather.

Sirius refused to let his wince ruin his proud look, so he'd startled Harry again, Harry was sure to shake it off and continue playing.

"Looks like you got spotted," Remus noted lightly.

Sirius cocked his head to the side, curious why he would have moved even if Harry had stared at him. Honestly he'd have much rather his future self had done something that would make Harry want to seek him out, rather than this constant disappearing act. The Knight Bus he could understand not wanting to hang around, but in the stands like this, why should he do more than he already was to stay out of sight?

"Dang it Sirius," James fake scowled, "quite distracting him!"

"Well I am just so sorry he spotted me at all," Sirius grinned with good nature, then he turned to Harry and said with mock sternness, "how dare you pick me out in the crowd like that and get caught off guard."

Harry was chuckling lightly, ignoring the growing tension inside of him as he continued bouncing around in unease. All of the boys noticed his mood this time, and James frowned for real now, wondering if Harry really might have lost the match this time. He quickly turned back to the book rather than let anyone dwell on it too much.

'Doubt yelling at it actually helps' Lily couldn't help but think, but leaned forward, just as hopeful as anyone else that Harry truly did win.

Harry groaned, coiling back into the couch suddenly as the ghost of a chill crept back over him; he now knew without a single doubt what was going on, and he didn't want this one little bit.

James turned an ugly shade of gray as he looked swiftly from the book, to his son, to Sirius; coming to the sudden realization why Sirius might have run out of there now. If Sirius had sensed the dementors coming, it's no wonder he would have bolted.

Sirius had to restrain himself from not shivering so hard it would wake up the napping child in his lap, but instead wrapped his arms as tight around him as he could without disturbing him. Remus gave him a pitiful look, but no words of comfort really came to mind.

Lily made a choking noise, remembering all too well what had happened the last time Harry had been around those things. She didn't even have the heart to ask how high up he was on his broom, but simply scooped up her sons hand and held it tightly in her own, feeling slightly warmed when he returned the pressure.

"Like I needed confirmation," James muttered as he turned the page with perhaps more force then necessary out of nerves.

"A-a hun-" Lily stuttered, looking nearly faint.

"Harry passed out when he was around one," James moaned, his hands shaking so hard the book was close to falling from his grip.

Harry didn't seem to appreciate the reminder, but he just couldn't muster up the energy to gripe at his dad for it. The echo of that empty, cold feeling was as clear now as if he were in front of a dementor right now, but it wasn't nearly as bad as what his gut was insisting. Something was about to happen, something bad, something that his family wasn't going to appreciate hearing about.

Sirius and Remus exchanged a look, still on the same mindset as James and hoping that at least this time someone would step in sooner and try to get rid of those dementors. Then each remembered their own reason why that wouldn't have happened. Remus was too sick to attend class, surely he was passed out in a bed somewhere. Sirius had just made a run from the arena, most likely unaware of Harry's condition, and even if he was, could he really do anything to help without getting caught?

James swallowed hard, now desperately wishing he had forced Sirius to read this chapter just so he wouldn't have to, but knew it wouldn't be right to force anyone else to read about this either, so he mustered himself up and read.

'Why him!' Lily wanted to sob. Those things were in a stadium full of people, she vaguely understood why they would have been attracted to the swells of emotion coming from there, but why would any of them focus on her son in particular. She wasn't an expert on dementors, and wasn't even sure of how they worked. She understood they could be controlled and given directions, but she also couldn't understand how that would relate to her son. She had no doubts though that no one understood this any better than her, maybe Remus, but she was far more concerned with hearing that Harry didn't break every bone in his body and couldn't bring herself to ask without really starting to cry so bottled that in.

Now the book really did clatter to the floor, and James couldn't help the tears that sprung to his eyes. He realized what Harry was remembering now...

"Oh," Lily whispered, swallowing very hard and blinking slowly and carefully as she tried her very best not to burst into tears as she suddenly realized what her baby's worst memory was.

Harry went pale as his father, leaning away from the book as if it were going to lash out and bite him, and almost wishing it would. That would feel better than this horrible pit that was growing inside of him as that memory came back to mind.

James was just looking down at the book like it truly was his dead wife. He didn't think he could do this, sit here and read about Lily's final moments. It wasn't like when he'd realized the deadly situations Harry was in, like reading the basilisk. Then, he could continually glance up at his grown son, and take comfort Harry had survived. Now though, now he truly couldn't do that, because Lily...

"Here," and suddenly his son was being placed into his vacant hands, and James was rather startled to realize that his lap had some odd little wet spots. He shook his head so violently his glasses were nearly tossed across the room as he glanced up and around to see Sirius now picking up the book and rummaging around for his spot. Then he quickly went about settling his now fussy child, who clearly wasn't pleased at the sudden change in placement.

Both Sirius and Remus were the color of new snow, and one look over showed Harry and Lily were only a bit better than James because they were clinging to each other. Harry was all but curled into his mother, and while Lily's lower lip was trembling violently she was holding herself together by brushing her hand repetitively through her son's hair in comfort for them both.

Sirius' hands were shaking so bad, he was likely to get a couple of paper cuts from flipping pages until he found his place, but he'd take that any day rather than try and watch James say what he forced out next.

He had read all of that so fast, most of the words had strung together and his voice was so thick with emotion it was lucky they understood any of it. They all had though, so it was more unlucky in this case. Sirius had to clear his throat several times before he made as if to keep going, but then James forced himself to collect his emotions, and shove them out so that he could deal with it later. For now, he gave Sirius a grateful squeeze on the shoulder, and offered back Harry.

Sirius took a moment to silently asses his friend. He didn't really like what he saw, but under the circumstances the fact that James wasn't curled up into a ball on the floor was a miracle in itself, so he relented. Recognizing that James needed to do this for himself, not only finish this chapter, but continue reading this play out.

Remus and Sirius exchanged a look, loaded down with concern and their own distraught at the situation, but Sirius did indeed take the baby back so that James could read. Taking several deep breaths to make sure he could go on intelligibly, he began again.

"That's right comforting to wake up to that is," Harry mumbled, rubbing furiously at his arms to get the ghost of that chill away. Lily wrapped her arm protectively around him, not letting any more space between them then she could help, but knew better than to offer a spell to warm him. This wasn't the kind of thing normal heat could cure, but her warm hug seemed to be doing the trick.

"Don't rightly want him to remember to be honest," James huffed, dearly wishing he could purge that own memory from his system, let alone it festering in his son's mind.

Remus sighed, wondering if it might be in his power in this future to convince Dumbledore Harry might do some good with a couple of extra DADA lessons. He was clearly vulnerable to dementors in particular, who could blame him, and Remus knew without a doubt he'd work day and night with Harry to help him learn the charm to counter them. Considering how limited he'd been so far though, he couldn't help but wonder if the headmaster would assent to this. Clearly Remus didn't have a lot of say in the matter, despite that right now he wouldn't have cared and done it anyways no matter what anyone said, it seemed in this future he may have lost his will along with his friends.

"Absolutely peachy, and you?" Sirius scowled.

The group gave a collective shudder, now knowing they'd rather break an arm then allow Harry near those dementors again.

"Because this wasn't the worst day of my life already, I really needed that mental image," James scowled, for the first time ever really wanting Fred to shut up now.

That drew a wane smile from Lily at least, remembering her little guess that Hermione might truly see Harry as more than a friend, or at least it was heading that way, but she still felt a little too emotional about a few other things to really think on it.

James snorted so violently the book nearly slipped from his grasp again.

"Well, glad he's got his priorities straight," Remus said in a too high pitched voice.

Harry gave them a rather sheepish look, before shrugging and admitting, "really didn't want to dwell on that memory in front of them, so I picked the first thing that came to mind."

"Would they do a replay?" Lily asked quickly, fully understanding his logic.

James mulled that over for a moment, deciding he needed to thank his son for giving him this distraction as he said aloud, "It depends. What with the dementors interrupting, and depending on when exactly Harry fell off, if that other kid caught the Snitch before Harry fell it would have been fair."

Harry didn't think his feelings could actually sink lower, but now as he continued remembering his teammate's faces, and his father's words sinking in, he realized this day actually could get worse.

James winced as he realized he wasn't exactly helping, so hoping he was wrong he read.

"Dang it," they all muttered, though absently noting they didn't feel nearly as down about this as they should have. Somehow, this game just didn't feel as important as it should have anymore. They were certain that if Harry had won and this still happened, they would have properly congratulated him, but do to circumstances, James instead did what any good father would and told his son, "'s'alright Harry. Can't win every match you play right? You're still a damned good Seeker, but even the best have to lose at it sometimes."

Harry beamed over at him, warmed beyond belief the others didn't blame him all the more for not only bringing up this terrible memory, but losing the game to boot. They were in fact going out of their way to comfort him and still try to make him feel better.

"Least he's a decent kind," Sirius grinned.

They all grimaced, thinking the captain of the team should be up there making sure Harry was okay along with everyone else, but none of them could muster up the energy to be too mad at him, still all to drained themselves.

James immediately took back what he'd thought before about wanting the twins to shut up, and hoped these two would set Harry straight then like he had now.

"See, you're not even out of the running yet," Remus reminded bracingly, making Harry really smile this time. He may have lost the match, and was still stuck on hearing his mother's last moments, but it was still good to know he hadn't lost his team the running. Surely there must be some way to combat dementors and their effects, his gut was already assuring him he was on the right track so that he could fix this problem and hopefully not have to deal with this ever again.

"Happens to the best of us," James and Sirius said together. It still wasn't as funny as it usually was to them, but any attempt at humor was happily welcomed as the somber mood continued to linger.

"She's such a killjoy," Remus huffed with a roll of his eyes.

"Oh good, at least they got to stay," Lily slightly perked up.

"Good of him, least someone did," they all muttered a variation of this, still wanting to kick at themselves for not being the ones to do this.

"What silver stuff?" Harry asked swiftly, having noted before this was what Remus had been said to do as well to make them go away.

Remus was quick to respond, explaining all about the spell, and by the end Harry looked nearly back to normal. He was so sure in that moment that he must have already learned this, no matter how advanced Remus kept trying to tell him it was. The spell seemed very familiar to him, it seemed to hold a significance he couldn't place, plus Remus being the one to tell him this felt right. When Harry tried to explain this to them, they all beamed with pleasure, having no doubts that, no matter how hard it would be, Harry, along with Remus' help, could master this.

James grimaced in disgust, mentally tallying up the times he'd had to say that aloud, and growing more than sick of the number.

"Guess you didn't tell them then," Lily murmured, hardly looking upset this time. She personally didn't want to sit around and hear Harry explain this to anyone, let alone his friends.

"Oh this can't be good," James' frown actually depend at their hesitation, then he read quickly.

"Someone couldn't have summoned it back?" Sirius asked listlessly, personally still too distracted by memories to come to really think on this much.

Considering how numb most of them felt, this really couldn't draw nearly as much of a reaction out of them as it normally would have. It was pretty awful that something like that happened to him, but it was clear as Harry continued leaning into his mother it wasn't his greatest concern right now. Sirius couldn't even bring himself to make the joke that falling off his broom had really been the better option.

"And I'm guessing the broom didn't come out on top in that fight," Remus sighed, so quietly no one but Sirius really heard it, and he couldn't really muster up a smile for him this time.

"I'm sure Harry remembers that actually," James grumbled.

"Ouch," James muttered, tossing the book away from him and watching with only the vaguest satisfaction as it landed on the table, then reached eagerly out for his son which Sirius willingly handed over.

* * *

So this had to be like the most depressing chapter, for all kinds of reasons. Their wrong assumptions of all these people's motives, poor dang Sirius, Remus, and James, Lily and Harry, and Harry's Nimbus... don't know if it was my mood writing this chapter that caused this or not, but I hope you still enjoyed.

*This is just something personal I noticed but couldn't work in how to make anyone point it out since Harry would obviously know by now, but does this mean that Hogwarts has block scheduling? Harry went his whole first week and didn't have DADA until Friday, why would Snape tell them to give it to him Monday. He's clearly assuming he'll have the class again for the assignment to be handed in to him, but that must mean the weeks have different class time frames different weeks. In the next chapter though, they clearly have DADA again on that Monday, so I don't know why they wouldn't have had it on their first week.


	10. THE MARAUDER'S MAP

Such heartwarming reviews that make me blush and just so infinitely happy to every last person, thank you a million to every person who offered up explanations and to those throwing out praise, if I could I'd send you all a million thank you's for life.

Wrote this chapter while a tornado was going on, for some odd reason my family thinks I have mixed priorities but I can't figure out why.

* * *

Sirius never thought he could both hate and love a book so much at the same time. The look on James face when he'd heard Lily's last words would forever haunt him until his dying day, but the euphoric feeling of getting to know every detail of Harry's life would never cease to make him smile. There was still a horrible, lingering silence as they were still slightly absorbing the last chapter, and none of them really believed it would actually get better at this point since Harry obviously seemed to attract dementors to himself. No, their best hope was for someone to teach Harry that spell already, most preferably Remus, so that Harry, or anyone, would never have to suffer like that again. Swallowing hard past a lump in his throat, Sirius began reading, wondering if his hoping for the best was a lost cause at this point.

"Doubt that was necessary," Remus rolled his eyes, knowing personally how overbearing the matron could be.

"I didn't mind though," Harry sighed, though when he didn't volunteer more no one pressed him.

"Felt that way about my first broom to," James nodded in understanding, remembering he'd kicked up a fuss when his dad had thought he'd outgrown his first toy broom and thrown it out.

"Never not grateful for that man," Lily murmured, forcefully brushing at her eyes to make sure too much emotion wouldn't continue trying to well up in her.

"Daw, what a pleasant little gift," Sirius smirked lightly, which only increased when he saw how hard Harry was blushing.

"Was it like, a gag gift or something?" Remus asked curiously, "or was it really meant to sing shrilly and she thought you'd enjoy that."

"Far as I know, it was supposed to be funny," Harry shrugged, looking very much like he wanted to change the subject no matter how much he was smiling at the attention Ginny gave him.

All four of them scowled heavily at that, still feeling that as team captain Wood really should put Harry's feelings into account about his mood in there. It even flitted across James mind for a second Wood might consider taking Harry off the team, because if Wood saw Harry's fainting around dementors a danger to the game he really wouldn't put it past the boy. Of course he'd raise hell for that, but didn't bother to bring it up right then in hopes he was wrong.

"Good," Lily relaxed at once, more than happy Oliver wasn't going to make Harry feel worse.

"Someone needs to get it through their head that they don't even need to leave then," Sirius smirked.

Any form of good mood was erased at once, because no one needed to ask that this was clearly why Harry didn't mind being in the hospital wing for the weekend. Harry surely wouldn't want to go around, even to his friends, talking about something that made all of them want to burst into tears, and it hadn't even technically happened to them.

Now that did surprise them, but Sirius quickly read out the reason before anyone could ask.

"Err, yeah, I can see that," Remus nodded, ignoring the internal wince that he clearly hadn't made the effort to come see Harry up at the Hospital himself. He didn't care how sick he was, as many times as James had lost sleepless nights staying down there with him, he couldn't imagine how his future self worked out that this was okay.

Sirius felt a horrible tightening in his gut when that came out. Honestly he'd never thought about it like that, but Harry was right. In fact, was his animagus actually more symbolic than he'd ever let those jokes be. After all, hadn't his best friend died as well... he'd been silent for too long, and maybe they noticed something of the growing misery that was starting to eat him alive, either way Remus had to give him a pretty hard poke to get his attention before demanding, "come on Sirius, can't be too upset about this, it's not like you did anything."

Sirius nodded too quickly, muttering, "right," before rushing on and ignoring James and Remus giving each other a look behind his back.

Sirius opened, then closed his mouth, undecided if he wanted to make a joke about that or vomit.

Harry gave him a pitying look, then blurted, "Sorry Sirius, I know how upsetting it is to you now, wish I could take it back."

Sirius managed a weak smile for his pup for trying, it did make him feel slightly better Harry very clearly didn't mean those things now, but it wasn't erasing how he was now stacking up how many people in his life were going to die, and if it could really link back to him?

"Course, can't forget about them for five seconds," James grumbled, rocking his son gently.

Despite Remus' explaining this to him, he still shifted his weight around in agitation at yet another thing that made him stand out like this. This time Remus left the reassurance to Lily, who by now quickly soothed him and reminded him that most likely she'd do more than faint if she had to hear something like that. Remus was too busy scowling and grumbling to himself he really should have stinking come and talked to Harry by now, never not agitated at how long or whatever reason was stopping this.

"There's something I never want to read again," Sirius grumbled, hating that sentence nearly as much as he hated watching everyone else flinch because of it.

Lily made a horrible choking noise, trying her very best to hold back a whimper of pain that her son was now forced to live her waking nightmare. She almost half wished her boy hadn't regained back this particular memory at all, but then reflected that would do more harm than good in the long run, because if ever he did come into contact with a dementor he wouldn't even be prepared for it.

'Thanks Harry, I really hadn't figured that out the first time' Sirius frowned down at the book, leaning casually against James when he felt his best friend shivering in disgust at that. James gave him a grateful look, while cuddling his son close to him for comfort, the only thing still keeping the pair of them going at this point was the constant mantra of 'we can fix this, we have to!'

"Yeah it's official, the hospital wing can do more damage than good," Remus scowled, knowing personally how dreading it could be to have nothing else to think about and so you linger on your thoughts like Harry was clearly doing now.

They all breathed a sigh of relief, more than happy if Harry never had to think of that again.

All five of them groaned at this, realizing that Malfoy's lame joke would only have doubled in credibility at that public event.

"There's the bright side," Remus rolled his eyes in disgust.

"Least now he couldn't force me to help with his potion ingredients anymore," Harry nodded.

"Why hasn't anyone hexed this one yet?" Sirius scowled.

"Thank you," James beamed.

"Ron's the best friend ever," Remus snickered.

"Worth it," Harry chuckled, knowing he'd likely have done the same thing if Malfoy had turned on Ron like that.

"One hundred percent agree," Lily nodded sagely, causing the boys to smirk all the more.

"Thank you," they all sighed in relief.

Remus really couldn't help the involuntary wince that caused, remembering quite well how his transformations had felt before his friends had helped him to cope while they were animals. No he didn't remember anything clearly, but the pain he'd suffered had been more than double before his friends had joined him. He was soon looking at twelve years of that solitude. He neglected bringing that up, deeming it his own problem to deal with.

James and Sirius exchanged worried looks, not needing Remus to remind them of how sick he could feel around these times, but feeling a slight comfort that surely Sirius had been there for him this last time at least, so they declined saying anything either.

"Poor Remus," Lily smiled lightly, "James and Sirius were right, most of your job seems to be listening to kids complain."

Remus hardly looked like he was upset, the opposite in fact as he was smiling widely that these kids seemed to like him well enough they felt they could openly complain like that at all.

Remus still didn't think the likes of Snape should be defended, but he did say to Harry, "in any other case, that could be argued. Snape was being extreme, but a substitute has every right to give homework as any other teacher to make sure you were paying attention."

Harry grumbled something and rolled his eyes, and James and Sirius looked disgusted there friend was defending giving out any form of homework, but there really was no point in arguing it any further.

"Can imagine why that would bother you," Lily agreed grimly.

"Someone seems really indignant about that," James said mildly.

"Can't imagine why," Sirius grumbled.

"I'd personally like to sit in on that conversation," Sirius said, perking up at once.

"Really Sirius, what do you think I'm going to do?" Remus rolled his eyes.

"Something more than talk," James answered, not bothering to hide his hope one bit.

Remus just rolled his eyes at the pair, not exactly in agreement, but unable to argue the point either. As of right now, he was feeling a bit more than talking was in order for what Snape had tried to do and would very dearly like to either hex him or at least take it up with Dumbledore, but he had no idea what his future self might be thinking. If his actions so far were an example, he may have even said that just to pacify them and not bring it up with anyone ever.

"Yes!" They all cheered. Remus personally thought his reasons might have been just slightly selfish in that decision, perhaps he should have shortened it rather than outright undermining Snape and saying they shouldn't do it, but there was nothing for it now.

"Why am I not surprised?" Lily snorted.

They all gave appreciative chuckles of amusement for that good timing.

"Now what's this?" James leaned over eagerly, more than happy for any instance of Remus and Harry getting to talk some more. Sirius quickly elbowed him back out of the way so he could read.

"Bet you bout had a heart attack when you did," Lily murmured, noting he wasn't exactly looking at Harry as he spoke, which probably meant he was either upset or ashamed about not being there. They'd all noticed his laps in not going to see Harry in the hospital as well, but at this point it would have just been even more awkward if he had shown up then so they were trying not to take it as personally.

'Poor Remus' James thought sadly, knowing his friend would probably do anything to buy Harry another one right then.

Remus scowled and grumbled something, still personally blaming himself for whatever that stupid tree continued to do to Harry.

"And what a coincidence," Sirius snickered.

"Wasn't Peter the one who dared him to do that?" Sirius chuckled in remembrance.

"It was before we knew what was under it," James defended their friend, "then we thought it was just for show, or advanced Herbology."

This time Remus forcefully ignored the feeling that kept cropping up whenever it mentioned how awkward these talks between them were.

"Oh I'm sure that was a sight," Lily said without any amusement.

"Thank you!" They all burst out in relief, knowing it would have driven them all that much crazier if Harry had continued to sit on this.

"Probably had that written all over my face," Harry sighed, having been thinking on that all weekend.

"What a friendly little reminder, I thank you," Sirius rolled his eyes without any humor.

"Put a few more horrible details in there why don't you, you were doing so well," James smirked.

Harry cocked his head to the side, wondering why on earth that particular sentence should seem familiar to him. Surely he'd never been around both dementors and muggles at the same time, right?

Sirius' mood, already taking a downturn whenever these monsters were mentioned, continued sinking all the lower as the longer this went on the more vivid imaginations came to mind of what exactly he had to look forward to in the near future. The opposite of pleasant to think about, but he ignored his friend's attempts at comfort and kept reading loudly in hopes to get this over with.

James had to swallow back a bit of bile at that phrasing. He, much like his best friend, getting cold all over at the thought of Sirius or Harry being forced in there company for too long.

It was beginning to occur to Lily for the first time that Sirius may not have gone and tried to steal a wand at any point, because was he even able to still have magic after such exposure? Surely turning into a dog, which seemed to have helped enough for him to escape, had helped to retain his magic as well? Could it have gone even farther, as this must be the reason he hadn't lost his mind like every other had. She wanted to offer the suggestion to her boys, but they looked so miserable at this constant topic she decided she'd try pointing it out later if, and hopefully never, Sirius' mindset came back into question.

"Thank you Remus," Lily grinned at him, "high time someone said that to him."

Harry grinned over at him and repeated that thanks, causing Remus to blush and mutter about how it wasn't that big of a deal even if he did agree with them.

"Bet I just loved that one," Remus went from red to sallow faster than a traffic light changing.

All five of them winced in pain at that, hating this near constant reminder now at just how close Remus and Harry weren't. This should have been a time where Harry could have sought comfort in him, and instead Remus still felt too insecure to do much more than stand there. It was both infuriating and depressing all at the same time.

"I can think of a few reasons," Sirius sighed, not exactly happy for this change in subject, it was hardly better than the last one.

"Yeah, that was the main one," Remus nodded in agreement, meaning Sirius, and ignoring James and Sirius snickering that he'd just agreed with himself.

"You've no idea how right you are," James huffed, curling his lip up in disgust at the thought.

"I swear, this really does just keep getting better," Sirius snarled.

"Just as subtle as ever my friend," Sirius said, releasing a bark like laughter for that. Remus' random display of clumsiness and inability to hide what he'd been thinking in that moment almost bringing a good mood back to the room.

"All true," James smirked, "though of course, no one's tested one little theory in particular."

"You're all just so proud of that, aren't you?" Lily asked indulgently, suddenly realizing the boys would have worked this out on their own by now anyways, and this could be why they were so adamant about knowing Sirius' mind set. Maybe Sirius still needed it pointed out though, or perhaps he'd come up with some counter argument in his own head they needed to knock away.

"Glad you remember that," Remus chirped, brightening at once. If Harry really came to him now, asked for his help with this, perhaps Dumbledore wouldn't say no to both of them?

"Yes!" The room cheered, more than happy at this turn of events.

"You don't have to pretend," Sirius scoffed, "you know plenty to get him going, don't have to write a book on the subject."

'Why am I hesitating' Remus wanted to ground out in frustration. Was he really so afraid of getting close to Harry, he'd leave him dry like this? Surely not? The others must be thinking along the same lines, but no one said anything until they got Remus' real answer.

James and Sirius were nearly bouncing in place with happiness. 'Try and help?' Please, Remus would get Harry through this just fine. Sure there were horrible complications and questions, like how for instance they were actually going to be practicing this, but the point was, Harry was finally going to get the help he needed!

"Chose," James rolled his eyes, as if Remus ever chose when it was a full moon.

"That's not so bad," Lily said eagerly, "Harry shouldn't have another run in with them any time soon anyways."

"Why so long though?" Harry asked, knowing he'd rather get started on these sooner rather than later, but so grateful at the time he hadn't questioned his professor. He had no qualms asking Remus now.

Remus didn't really look happy about answering, still kicking himself for trying so hard to push this off as he said, "I'd need Dumbledore's permission to set this up, plus if I'm counting the timing right holidays are right about to start and you wouldn't want to do this during Christmas anyways."

Harry nodded back in agreement with all of that.

"I'll admit that's rather promising," James muttered, trying to force down his shudder of disgust at that sentence existing.

"Just what we needed," Sirius laughed out right.

"Oh I really missed this," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Let's hope it stays that way," Remus agreed.

The four of them refused to give in to their wince of pain this time. Harry had yet to have a really good holiday, so far marred by horrible memories, but this year was sure to be different. It felt too much like tempting fate though, so none of them voiced this hope aloud.

"Love the castle this time of year," Lily beamed.

"I never get tired of hearing your friends lame excuses," Sirius snickered, he always came right out and stated why he stayed behind at the castle.

Harry refused to let his mood head back south now that it was clear everyone was looking forward to a good holiday, so he refrained from mentioning just how upset this trip already made him feel. Surely he was just upset because he got left behind again, right?

"You mean you haven't already?" James mock shook his head in scolding.

"Now there's a good way to spend your day," Sirius beamed, "I'd have probably stayed behind out of the cold just to do that to."

"Ergh, yeah, I can completely see you spending money on this very important matter," James said in a completely serious tone of voice.

Lily made sure he could see her rolling her eyes at him, but didn't protest this either. Harry was still on the team, he did need his own broom, even if the longer this went on the more she grew to hate this sport and everything about it.

Remus and James leaned over at once, trying to pry the book away from Sirius so they could see if this was really happening. Sirius was having none of it, and eagerly elbowed the pair back out of the way so he could read what he hoped was happening.

"Because they're about to show you something really important," James breathed, wriggling in place so much in excitement Sirius had to nudge him again to get him to stop so that he could concentrate.

Lily had a fairly good idea what the twins were about to show Harry just from her boys' reactions, but she looked just as puzzled as the others now. Why not simply show Harry the secret passageway and be gone? Why drag him into an empty classroom? Guess the twins were just being paranoid and didn't want anyone to overhear them giving him instructions.

Sirius nearly passed out from excitement.

"They didn't! Please tell me that they did!" James nearly squealed in excitement.

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Remus tried to sooth, the impact lost as he looked nearly as excited as the other two at what this could mean.

"What's all this?" Harry finally demanded when it became clear they were understanding something he didn't.

"Remember I once mentioned we made a map of the school?" James asked eagerly.

Harry had to rake his brain for a moment before remembering this had come up back when he'd found the Chamber. At the time, he'd very dearly wanted to remember something important about this, and he now had a delighted feeling this may have been it. After nodding eagerly, Harry was now nearly as excited to find out if this was the same bit of parchment or not.

Lily smiled lightly at them all. She knew of the Marauders Map of course, and she honestly couldn't come up with a good reason why Harry shouldn't have it.

"Please, not now," Remus muttered.

"Thank Merlin to whatever made them decide that," Sirius said fervently.

James pressed his hand over his heart as if Harry had just mortally struck him, causing the others to snicker at his theatrics. He didn't carry on long however, to eager to see Fred and George really show Harry what was going on.

All of them snorted, knowing these types of twins were hardly ever innocent.

"So glad you agree," Remus smirked.

"I just can't imagine why," Lily pointed out with heavy sarcasm.

"I love these twins," Sirius was smirking so wide his face was likely to get stuck that way soon, not that he seemed to care.

"Why was it marked Highly Dangerous?" Lily asked curiously. "What exactly did Filch think it was?"

"That's just it," James gave her a Cheshire grin that would have made any kid in school take several wary steps back. Lily did no such thing, but instead raised a brow at her husband, who decided to go on in more normal tones. "We never told him what it did. For some odd reason he assumed the worst of us and threw it in that cabinet."

"Bless those twins," Remus snickered, dearly wishing he had sat in on them trying to get it to work.

"Doesn't sound bad to me at all actually," Sirius cackled.

"He's got that part right," James agreed.

Lily couldn't help but roll her eyes at that one, dearly wanting to smack Sirius for how pompous he truly sounded in that moment.

"Not possible at this point, they've said too much," Remus shook his head eagerly.

"How would they have even worked out such a specific code?" Lily asked in wonder.

"We gave that thing some heavy enchantments, we'll not deny that," Remus answered fairly, not wanting just any old person to walk across it and pick it up to use.

"But we also made sure that, if someone else did come along for it for any reason, it wouldn't be totally inaccessible," James continued eagerly. "You see, if you sort of play around with the wording, and the closer you get to the correct phrasing, the more properly the map will work."

"We might have even set them in the right direction," Sirius added on, thinking of the nifty little trick they'd added in for security against someone they didn't like setting it off. The charm used to insult the attempter could also be reversed to help the user if the map deemed them worthy, and there was no doubt in their mind the twins were worthy.*

"You lot are so full of yourselves," Lily sighed in a long suffering voice.

None of them seemed to hear her, they were too busy explaining to Harry any and every detail that came to mind about their proudest object to date they'd ever created as a group, and the odds that it had landed in their soul heirs lap. Harry seemed to almost be stalling he was asking for all sorts of details, but none of them really grew suspicious until he ran out and Sirius made to keep reading. Harry bit at his lip, still looking excited he'd discovered this wondrous object, but still wary for some odd reason he didn't seem to want to be sharing. Surely he was just nervous about his first time using this, yes?

Harry really didn't want to admit that, the longer this went on, something really bad was about to happen after he got this map.

"I thought Hogwarts was unplottable though," Lily said shrewdly. James had only ever told her about the map after they'd left school, so she'd never seen it first hand, or really appreciated like she was in that moment just how much work must have gone into such a project.

"Magically unplottable," Sirius corrected. "You can't use a charm to just create it like you can normal plans for a building. It's why it's designed how we did, by hand."

"How come the twins never would have spotted Voldemort with Quirrell back in first year?" Harry probed thinking back on that time and how surely the twins would have picked out that name.

"Well first of all, his name would have shown up as Tom Riddle, not Voldemort," James shrugged, "so they wouldn't think anything of it at all to randomly spot a student being told off in his office or anything when they spotted it."

"Also, he might not have shown up at all, because he didn't even technically have his own body," Sirius added on. "Of course we've never tested that theory,"

"And here's hoping it never comes up," Remus added in with a remembered shiver of disgust.

"But it makes sense," Sirius finished.

"Damn," all three boys scowled, wondering how on earth he'd figured those out since they'd left. In all fairness, he could have known about them before they did and they'd just never caught him at it, but it still wasn't pleasant to find out.

"Rats," Sirius scowled with a snap of his fingers, "that was one of my favorites."

"Course the one with the mirror would be yours," Lily snipped.

"Oh yeah," James didn't even try to muffle his chuckles, "no one ever uses that one, no one at all!"

"Guess they never figured out how to work the tree then," Sirius snickered.

Remus was personally glad they hadn't, as he would rather the twins hadn't met a rather unfortunate event this particular year, but said nothing out loud.

"My personal favorite," James smacked his lips in appreciation.

"James,-" Lily began in a threatening tone of voice, hating to think he was now encouraging their son to steal.

He waved her off at once and said, "please Lily, I left them money, give me some credit."

"No thanks is needed really," Sirius smirked, his eyes lighting up proving otherwise. "We're more than happy to help."

"Imagine their delight when they find out one of them's a teacher this year," James pointed out, causing a whole new round of laughter for all of them.

"Can't imagine why they'd practice that," Remus snickered.

"Oh I'm sure he'll get right on that," James beamed with pride.

All of the boys looked deliriously happy now, more so than they had in a long time. Harry had not only just inherited the Map they'd spent countless hours poring over, but he also happened to be in possession of the Cloak as well! Mix in Ron and Hermione's thinking, and the three of them could have a next set of troublemakers brewing.

They were in such a good mood, they didn't notice Lily giving Harry a very worried look. The longer this went on, the more Harry kept rubbing at his temple, a sure sign something was about to happen. This should be a good memory for Harry, why did he seem to continue to sink into himself and give Sirius a furtive look when he thought his godfather wasn't watching. Harry was trying his best to push those feelings away, but Lily couldn't help but continue to feel antsy as Sirius continued.

"Sound advice," James nodded seriously, "but this is an exception to that rule. Be wary of magical items you don't know the source of-"

"-but in this case," Sirius cut him off before James' 'daddy mode' could ruin all of his fun, "there's no danger in sight, so you're fine pup."

Harry gave them both reassuring smiles, feeling rather sure he had held onto this map and nearly positive at this point his feelings were correct and he'd traveled into Hogsmeade this day. This didn't seem to make him feel any better though.

"Good of you to be cautious though," Lily still praised him, at least for a moment taking that look away.

"Atta boy, there's using sound logic," Remus beamed.

"Can't say we never used it for all of those purposes and more," Sirius muttered in amusement.

"Course there's not," James rolled his eyes, "you just checked the map. Surely you would have seen someone coming."

"Best not to act too suspicious with that on you," Sirius agreed sagely in what he clearly thought was giving his sound advice voice, "don't want the wrong teachers, or Filch, to catch that on you without a good reason yet."

The three present Marauders grinned at one another, then James threw Lily an obvious look, clearly saying 'see, we thought this through.'

Lily didn't quite understand yet, and couldn't deny she was curious how they had worked this into the map.

"Handy," Lily said in equal amounts of amusement, surprise, and admittedly rather impressed.

"So glad you agree," James smirk only increased at his wife's praise.

"It expands," Remus told him quickly when Harry looked like he was fixing to ask.

The boys couldn't help it, they were still bouncing around in absolute pleasure. This was better than any of them could have hoped for! Not only was Harry getting into Hogsmeade as he so rightly deserved, but the means by which he was doing it couldn't be better!

"Sometimes it feels like it," Sirius agreed, "other times it feels like you blinked and you're hitting your head on the end."

"How far is it really?" Lily asked curiously.

"Don't know," James shrugged, "never actually counted. Since it's a direct line to Honeydukes, I'd say it might be a shorter walk then the path down into Hogsmeade, but not by much."

"Best motivation there is," Remus agreed.

"I did that nearly every time," Sirius agreed as Harry rubbed his head in remembrance, "never could remember how far up that thing was."

"Just better hope you find it again," James pointed out, "we tried our best to leave some kind of mark the shopkeepers wouldn't notice the first few times so we could."

Lily crinkled up her nose in disgust, she hated that candy in particular.

"Which is a benefit of bringing the cloak along with the map," Remus pointed out.

"My little Marauder Junior," James cooed fondly to the napping child in his lap, causing Harry next to his mother to beam with pride while Lily felt like smacking her husband for no more reason then calling her son that. She supposed it was vaguely better than Bambi,** which Remus had tried to get going for a while, not that either James or Sirius had understood that reference. Then she winced in self pain as that parallel was suddenly all too real to her son.

"There's a yuletide thought!" Sirius beamed.

"Sirius, you're drooling," Remus pointed out candidly.

Sirius ignored him and proceeded to read out every treat in this place with so much eagerness, it caused the rest of them to continue chuckling.

"Are you quite done now," James snickered, "or would you like to stop for a moment and collect yourself before you eat the book."

Sirius stuck his tongue out at him, not regretting a thing.

"Why?" Lily asked in disbelief.

"To say they'd tried one I suppose," Remus shrugged, "I've tried everything in there once, either out of personal curiosity or on a dare."

"Aw," Lily's disgust at the idea of trying half the things in that shop switched to pleasure at once, if still a bit confused as to why Harry's friends thought he'd like those at all.

"Definitely not," Harry smirked, knowing Ron had been joking, but laughing all the same at the squidged up way his mom's face went at that suggestion.

Every boy gave an appreciative chuckle at that, this was a light and minor prank to what Harry could have done to his friends when they didn't know he was behind them.

"Magic," Sirius said in a goofy tone of voice, before reading eagerly. He wanted to know how quickly Harry was going to tell his friends about this new possession.

"Wow, Ron can be really dense sometimes, can't he," Remus rolled his eyes at that suggestion.

"Not surprised," James shrugged, he'd have personally found it even odder if Harry hadn't told his friends about this as soon as he could.

Sirius opened, then closed his mouth as he cocked his head to the side in thought on that one.

"He's actually got a point," Lily agreed fairly. "If they were going to pass it on, why to Harry and not Ron?"

James snapped his fingers and said, "guess by the time they decided to give it up, Ron was already gone, so they just passed it to Harry cause he was there. I'm sure if they'd caught Ron in time, they would have just given it to him, knowing he'd loan it to Harry for this."

That didn't really line up with what Fred and George had said about giving it to Harry specially, but it really was the best answer any of them could come up with.

"Of course he is," Remus said right back, the idea far more then ludicrous to him. "What else would he do with it?"

Sirius read out the next line as if he'd just had his heart ripped out.

"Is she mad?" Lily balked. "Exactly why would he do that? He's not doing anything wrong by having it."

"You know it's bonkers when Lily agrees with us," James nodded in total agreement.

"And we wouldn't want to get the twins into trouble," Sirius rolled his eyes, knowing that wasn't exactly Hermione's greatest concern, but still unable to understand her stance against their map.

"Now that's fair," Remus nodded in understanding, giving Sirius a sideways look.

"And most likely true," Sirius agreed. Personally, if given the option, he would have been using the Mirror secret entrance as it was the most out of the way one, but even then he had full confidence he could use the Honeydukes one with ease to get in and out of the castle.

"And they could reckon wrong," James said without any real hope, knowing the twins probably would know something like this first hand.

"Plus it only leads to the Shack, so that's not the most useful thing to getting in the school," Sirius nodded.

Sirius couldn't help a wane smile at that. Of course he knew where that was, he'd been using it for years. He could have snuck in there blindfolded.

"Oh here we go," Sirius ground out in frustration, knowing he was going to hate anything coming from them for quite some time.

At this point the little shivers of disgust they all felt upon the mention of those things went almost unnoticed in the room.

"Poor people, having to deal with that the rest of their lives," James said with utter conviction, knowing he'd rather die all over again then find out Sirius ever wound up back in there.

"And a happy holidays to you too," Remus crinkled his nose in disgust.

'Shouldn't be too much of a challenge to be honest' Sirius mentally thought, rather confident enough in himself to believe that, though still unsure as to why he would sneak in the school at all. Yes he was positive he'd want to see Harry, get a chance to talk to him as soon as possible, but his actions on Halloween still disturbed him more then he wanted to admit.

James cleared his throat and put a very obvious shifty look on his face. His friends knew what that meant. After exchanging wary looks, Harry and Lily decided they just didn't want to know what these boys might have come up with to get past that type of thing.

"Have I mentioned how much of a killjoy she's been recently," Sirius rolled his eyes in agitation, perhaps a bit more than he meant to as he was still rather caught on his own thoughts.

Harry wanted to get angry at him for picking on his friend so much this year, but he was still unable to shake this bad feeling that something awful was about to happen. Something about Sirius perhaps? Did he have a run in with him? Shouldn't that be a good thing? Before he could let his mind continue straying around and building up a resounding headache, he chose to say nothing in fear it would come out more snappish then he meant.

"Oh for the love of-" Lily threw her hands in the air in frustration. How could Hermione really be arguing that one? Harry deserved to be out of the castle as much as anyone else. How could Hermione really still be trying to preach that rule to him, especially after everything they'd done in the past two years over other things?

"Then I would jump for joy," Remus rolled his eyes, though he would personally find it an odd coincidence if Sirius did chose that day to make another appearance. How would he know the Hogsmeade days of the students, as he obviously wasn't keeping himself well enough informed to even know the Gryffindor password.

"Glad there's that at least," James nodded.

"Would have really lost some faith in Hermione if she had," Sirius nodded in agreement.

"Merlin, where did he even get a hold of that?" Lily asked in shock.

"Probably one of their older brothers, like Bill or Charlie, and he took it from him as a joke but then passed it along to Ron or something," Sirius shrugged.

"Boys lucky to still have a tongue," James snickered.

This erased any trace of foul mood in the room at Hermione's expense, knowing full well that was more than appropriate payback, though personally thinking the twins were smart enough not to fall for that.

Lily's maternal instincts kicked in at once upon hearing her little HareBear was cold, but recognized it would be pointless to scold him for not thinking this far ahead as this was a rather spur of the moment foray.

"That could have some fun potential," James snickered.

Harry had been acting odd ever since the arrival of the map, now he was getting downright fidgety. He somehow knew his first trip into the Three Broomsticks was supposed to mean something monumental to him, something bad his mind helpfully supplied. He couldn't stop his eyes flickering over to Sirius, a horrible feeling building up in his gut as his mind continued very forcefully trying to tell him something about his Godfather. By now though, he was trying his very hardest to discipline his mind, and not let those memories surface. The book would provide, slowly yet surely. Whatever bad thing he thought was fixing to happen, he was sure his family could calm his mood yet again.

Sirius couldn't help but snicker, knowing personally Madam Rosmerta had been many Hogwarts' youth's first crush, and that was during his age. By Harry's description, she'd clearly aged with beauty.

"And the trend continues," Remus agreed verbally with Sirius' knowing look. Harry looked at the pair, unsure exactly what they were being so giggly about, but considering he was holding back vomit he didn't pluck up to ask them.

"Bit of a hazard to put that tree next to the fireplace," James said randomly as he glanced at his watch, and noting how late it was getting. They should probably have dinner after this chapter.

"It's probably fireproofed, unless some idiots I can think of would set it alight on purpose," Lily said pointedly, which all three boys studiously ignored.

"Well this can't be good," they all muttered, wondering what force on earth was causing Harry that kind of reaction now. Couldn't their boy have one good and peaceful day?

"Yeah, I can see why you reacted now," James scowled, mentally grumbling at the world for the timing of this nonsense. Couldn't Harry have just one day where he could kick back and enjoy himself.

"Oh for the love of Merlin," Sirius scowled in outrage, previously not even thinking it could get worse, and hating how wrong he was.

None of the others could think of a thing to say to this, Sirius' hatred of the Ministry and its leader during this time was completely understood and rather paralleled by everyone else in the room for what had been done to him. For him to arrive now just seemed to give them that extra kick of annoyance no one needed.

"Hopefully that'll work, being in the corner and all," Remus huffed, beginning to grimace in agitation of just how wrong this could go so quickly.

"Oh for the love of Merlin!" James repeated in exasperation letting his head fall back against the couch in disbelief. They just had to pick the corner his son was hiding in didn't they!

"Thank Merlin for Hermione," Lily grumbled, more than pleased at this small distraction that would keep Harry even more out of sight. Of course if she was caught doing this, it would arise suspicions and Harry could be caught all the sooner, so she was now dearly hoping no one saw her doing this.

Remus was still muttering under his breath about the odds and chances of this mess, now Harry was stuck there until they moved. This was hardly his free day he'd so desperately been needing, but kept it quiet enough to himself so that Sirius could keep going. Not that he really looked like he wanted to. They were probably just going to sit around and talk about paperwork and boringness, his name might be mentioned, but that would only be even more annoying.

"Guess now I know to send McGonagall a bottle of that for Christmas," James rolled his eyes.

No one needed to ask who that tankered was for.

"That's something I enjoyed getting," Sirius laughed brightly at this odd comparison.

"Can't exactly say no when the Minister asks you for a drink I suppose," Lily shrugged.

"It's not unheard of they would get out of the castle," Remus sighed, "but still, the timing!" He exclaimed again in disbelief.

"Oh they shouldn't be there that long," Lily tried to reassure.

"Hagrid might," Sirius huffed with a roll of his eyes, and considering how he'd reacted the last time Harry had snuck out to see him, it didn't bode well.

"Hopefully just a pleasant chat with Dumbledore," Sirius said without any real hope in his voice.

"Of course," Sirius sighed with a roll of his eyes, not at all surprised he was wrong.

"Wish I could forget," James scowled, not at all delighted to hear these people, at least three of whom he highly respected, start bad mouthing and swapping rumors about his best friend. At this point he almost wished for boring paperwork talk.

"Wouldn't surprise me one bit," Remus sighed.

"Least we're not going to argue that point," Lily said agreeably.

"Then kick them out and send them away," Sirius snapped.

"Can't thank him enough for that one at least," James shuddered in disgust at how Harry would be feeling all the more awful if that was happening.

"Unless Voldemort himself is running around I'll have to disagree with you," Remus snipped.

"Oh and here we go again," Sirius groaned in disdain, taking a moment to plant his forehead against the pages before gathering himself up and forcing himself to continue on that horrid lie.

"Least someone other than Remus in this future does," James hissed.

"Have I ever mentioned how much I liked her, cause I don't think I say it enough," Sirius said warmly at what he considered a rather obvious statement that no one else seemed to agree with in this future.

"I'd have knocked your lights out, and that's being kind," Remus snapped.

Sirius couldn't help the curiosity that spiked up in him then. He hated hearing what he'd supposedly done, the very thought of murdering someone he even hated made his stomach roll let alone thirteen random people, but perhaps this 'worst thing' could help clear up some of this confusion.

Lily scoffed and still wanted to snap at how the Minister himself was gossiping, but she was far too curious to hear this then bring it up.

James began to get a very bad feeling in the pit of his stomach even as Sirius couldn't help but grin. While Sirius was thinking if there was one good thing he would be remembered for, at least it would be by his best friend. James on the flip side didn't like how this 'worst thing' conversation was starting.

It took a small moment for the others to understand Harry's reaction, then they had to remind themselves Harry wouldn't have known this. What was obvious to the boy now would have come as quite a shock to him, and for him to hear it like this! Remus or Sirius should have been the one to tell Harry this type of thing, not hearing it second hand like this.

"Little gang?" Remus scoffed, looking genuinely offended by that. "What were Peter and I, tagalongs?"

James and Sirius gave him almost superior smirks. While they would have defended their other two friends to anyone else, forever stating there was an equal bout of friendship between all of them, the two friends would never miss an opportunity to get under Moony's skin, so Sirius said cheekily, "nah, give yourself some credit Remus. I'd say more like groupies."

"Or at least pals," James agreed with a snicker.

Remus looked likely to knock their heads together at the clear teasing, now wishing Peter were here as well so the four of them could have a more proper argument/ jest at each other, but he was also just that little more annoyed that his name hadn't been mentioned for Harry's benefit. Surely if Harry had just found out he was a friend of his father's like Sirius, Harry would have come blasting in and demanded the conversation Remus was so clearly avoiding in the future.

"Exactly what I was about to say," James nodded in agreement, though still unable to wipe that grin off his face that if he was to be remembered for something at school, he was more than happy it was this.

"Might as well be by this point," Lily agreed in a mock suffering voice, since James' best friend was round here near as often as her own husband.

"Now that one hurt," Remus pouted, pressing his hand over his heart.

"Oh please, it's not like I told him that personally," James rolled his eyes in disbelief at the obvious mocking joke.

"Something I still regret to this day," Lily jibbed, "after the way you flirted with all of my bridesmaids."

Harry didn't hear whatever retort Sirius gave her, he was still trying his very hardest to ignore this sinking feeling that was gathering in him now. While nothing he'd heard so far seemed to awful to him now, there was still something very bad that was fixing to be found out that he'd rather stay buried for the time he was here. He knew without a doubt though that he could never properly explain this feeling, and so forced himself to stay tuned in as Sirius kept going.

"What, no cheeky little comment about that Lil'?" Sirius grinned over at her, clearly looking to pick a fight. This conversation hadn't been going nearly as awful as he'd feared and he wanted to keep it that way for as long as possible.

Lily however only dained him with a knowing look, unable to argue this point one little bit and knowing she'd still agree to this call every time.

Some of their amusement began ebbing out already, wincing when they reminded themselves why exactly this would be a torment to Harry when now he looked more amused than anything at their light banter. By now Harry had gotten very good at trying to bury his innate feelings, he was refusing to let it show just how uneasy this whole scene was making him. Even James was brushing away that nasty pit he'd felt before, surely Harry not knowing Sirius relation to him had just been the worst part.

Sirius still couldn't manage to say that with a straight face, his mouth twitching towards a grimace that anyone would think this, matched by every other person in the room.

"Did we now?" James said, more in mild amusement then anything. This clearly hadn't happened yet, which means they would find out within the next year. Of course this just frustrated him more than anything as he realized his future self knew something he didn't, like why Voldemort was after his family. Which gave James a splitting headache trying to understand that time loop.

"What's that?" Remus asked, clearly puzzled.

Lily was frowning with her head cocked to the side, then huffed in frustration when she admitted, "that's a rather old enchantment, used back in ancient times to protect nobles who were thought to be under threat. I've only read about the theory though, the actual incantation's been lost to time."

"Guess Dumbledore found it," Sirius said without any real surprise, personally thinking their headmaster probably knew a bunch of stuff like this and just didn't share it with the public.

Lily was nodding right along, very happy her old Charm's teacher was explaining it again, since the book she'd been reading it from was a translated and very old version and she hadn't even remembered all of those details.

James couldn't help a snort of mirth at that description, despite how horrible the thought still was at this whole scenario.

"Naturally," Remus rolled his eyes in good humor. James however was beginning to frown and shift around in agitation. This sounded like a fool proof plan to him, so what on earth had happened? Had Dumbledore not set up the spell in time, and he and Lily had been killed before Sirius had gotten to play his part?

"Damned right I would!" Sirius looked outraged anyone would think otherwise.

"Now that I'd have to see to believe," Remus chuckled, wondering what force had convinced Sirius his life was endangered enough to be pulled out of the fight. Then again, if he and Peter had convinced him that it would be safer for James and Lily's Secret Keeper to be in hiding, well that would make since.

Sirius scowled so heavily at the book, the object was lucky it didn't burst into flames. Dumbledore suspected him! Whatever faith he'd just held for his headmaster had just disappeared, since these suspicions had clearly been there before he'd even 'committed' that crime, possibly on his mind right now.

None of the others looked any happier at this, Dumbledore's implied actions making all of their blood boil in the worst way at what this was implying.

James went pale as ghost in horror. Yes, even now, the Order was beginning to question whether there was a traitor in their midst. The past few missions they'd been in, the Death Eaters had seemed to know a little too much about their plans, but it had to be wrong! No one in the Order could do something like this, let alone one of James friends, least of all Sirius!

"I don't believe this," Lily scowled in outrage. "I can't believe any of them would help the other side!"

"This is absurd," Remus snarled, thinking of the countless times Sirius had stuck his neck out for any of his friends, and now this was his legacy of all things!

While the others continued on in this same manner, insisting something must have gotten lost with time, there must be a piece to this puzzle Fudge was missing in this retelling; Harry was lost in thought. All of this was true, his gut and mind agreed as one with that, but that was all his mind would settle on. Something really was missing, but what? Bright spots of white began flashing across his vision in his need to keep such a memory buried and it was causing his head to pound so furiously it was beginning to drown out his surroundings.

His Mum had obviously seemed to notice, since the next thing he did recognize was her placing a hand on his shoulder. After blinking several times, he tried giving her a wane smile and explained, "there's something I need to remember, but I know the consequences if I do. Something really important about this though..." he trailed off in utter frustration at his inability to grasp at much of anything useful.

Sirius still wanted to lash out and shove that stupid bowler hat over the Ministers clearly screwed up head, but decided his Pup's needs were greater so kept going in hopes it would help.

None of them could ever hear that without wanting to scathe at the absurdity of that statement, but Harry still looked so out of it, and there was that comfort that he still didn't seem to believe this at least, that no one stopped this time to state this.

What Sirius couldn't help was the little gag that would always form whenever he was forced to hear that sentence, let alone say it aloud in any relation to his own hand being involved with this.

Sirius shuddered in horror at the moment Fudge was painting. He'd done the numbers obsessively in his head, and it just so happened that the weekend all of this had gone down had most likely been the weekend before his birthday. Nasty position indeed, he'd probably come over there to find his worst nightmare come to life, it was no wonder if he really had gone slightly stir crazy in that moment.

James and Remus were muttering every foul word they'd ever heard, and even made up a few on the spot, at just how ridiculous that whole scenario was. Here they were, desperate to find out what had happened to decimate Harry's future like this, and all they kept getting were false stories and more rumors.

"My sentiments exactly," Lily muttered, knowing Hagrid hadn't meant it the way she was thinking it towards whoever had really done this, but finding it appropriate nonetheless.

"There's a thought I never bleeding wanted," James and Lily shuddered in disgust of anyone pulling there helpless son out of the ruins of their household.

Sirius remembered a much happier time where him showing up on his bike, much like the night all this mess had started, would have been considered such a common occurrence he never would have thought twice about it. Now all he could think was the emotional wreck he was sure would be tearing him apart inside.

"Wouldn't have freakin' occurred to anyone to ask why he was there," Remus grumbled.

Remus cocked his head to the side, noting that this clearly hadn't been made public knowledge. Safer yes, but Hagrid had been well aware of most of the goings on of the Order back then. Dumbledore usually trusted him enough he didn't understand why he would have hid this from him or the rest of the Order. Of course since Dumbledore was wary about a spy...

Sirius hardly looked any better now, white and shaking the kindest things you could really call anyone in the room as they were forced once again to revisit what was all a living nightmare to them.

Lily sighed as she rubbed at her earlobe, unable to bolster up any kind of anger as Sirius screamed that. The baby kicked up a fuss in James arms for the disturbance, and James excused himself for a moment to go and put the baby down for the night. It truly just wasn't the environment for his son. Once he was back, he slumped back down into his seat as if it were an electric chair, hearing Sirius being forced to read this aloud as good as a death threat to him.

'Don't think upset rightly covers it' Sirius privately thought, but he was lucky at this point his voice was still intelligible, so he didn't risk saying that.

"I could sit here for years and list all the reasons that sentence is stupid, and still not get halfway through," Remus scoffed.

"Thank you for that lovely reminder, really brightened the mood that did," James scowled.

"Worst decision of anyone's life letting that happen," Lily agreed.

'Half wish I'd just keeled over then, letting that monstrosity of a life take place' Sirius mentally ragged, but again kept that line to himself.

"Now that was just sad Sirius," Remus attempted at a joke, which no one really seemed to find that funny.

"To be perfectly honest, I probably would have agreed with Hagrid in that moment if I didn't know the rest," James sighed.

Sirius shook his head sadly from side to side, again remembering much happier times when they'd jokingly said and given a very fair reason as to why he'd done this.

"Well obviously it was because he was about to go on a psychotic rampage," Lily scathed, "what other possible reason could there be."

"You still scare me when you do that," James told her with a straight face.

Sirius had to swallow very hard around a pile of bile that was building up in his throat. Sirius would still rather die than let this future come true, especially now that he realized he'd very plainly screwed up somewhere to cause all of this, made him see tiny little black spots that were going to cover up his vision very soon. He was still lucky he could continue blinking all of this out of his eyes and continue reading rather than attempt to say any of this, since he knew his friends would likely smack him in a heartbeat if he said this aloud. They would try and defend him, attempt to come up with some bull loaded excuse that was both lame and probably wouldn't make him feel any better, because at this point, he doubted anything anyone could say would really make him feel better. From the way the spell was set up, it was obvious he must have screwed up somewhere! So unless Harry himself told him that something else happened, and this scenario really didn't leave a lot of wiggle room that wouldn't leave him wanting to throw himself off the nearest tower, he'd just keep that little pit of heartbreak to himself for as long as possible.

"I actually think that would have turned out a lot better," Remus offered in a conversational tone of voice. "Might have stopped whatever mayhem followed if that had happened."

"I wish, I wish, with all my heart," Lily sighed.

Sirius really couldn't read that sentence without gagging a few times, using every bit of force within him not to burst into tears at the mental image, let alone Hagrid or anyone thinking he'd been the one to do it.

Sirius' voice finally switched gears from desolate to confusion all over again. Peter found him? So many questions made that come to mind, it hurt his head just to figure out where to begin.

His reaction was nothing though, compared to Harry's. He clawed at his temple, his eyes screwed so tight in pain it was a wonder he didn't try and curse his own head off to help alleviate it. Which was ridiculous because he'd already heard that name. His family had been using it freely since he'd been here, but there was something there! Something in regards to Peter's name and this subject, if only he could remember... he groaned in frustration as that pent up pain began ebbing out already, blinking horribly as he glanced around to find all eyes on him. He couldn't offer them anything, not even a smile to show that he was okay and already pushing past this, because he wasn't; far from it. He needed to remember something, something so incredibly important but it just wasn't going away or getting any easier. Sirius felt like he'd rather pull out his own teeth then keep going, but it hurt all the more to see his little pup in this kind of pain so read on he did.

Sirius let out such a horrible noise none of the others even knew how to define it. He looked likely to keel over any second as the book started shaking so hard it was a wonder it didn't fall out of his hands.

"Sirius?!" both James and Remus said as one in high pitched concern, both looking likely to either smack the life back into him or hug him until he couldn't breathe they sounded so worried.

"It's my fault," Sirius finally croaked out, this time unable to blink away the tears that traced his sallow skin. "I, I did something or, Merlin what did I do?"

"Stop that you idiot!" James snarled, looking very close to either tears himself or punching Sirius through a wall. "Pete reacts without thinking, we all know that." His mind kept scattering around, thinking back to his at the time laughable hysterics upon finding out Sirius' animagus, or how he'd initially flipped out when he'd found out Remus was a werewolf. Peter always did things without thinking them through, surely he was just as grief stricken and upset that he went and blamed it on the nearest available person, Sirius.

Sirius didn't seem to have heard him, he was still shuddering and looking around vacantly like he expected the grim reaper to appear any second. Remus kind of lost his temper, he reached forward and grabbed a fistful of Sirius shirt so that he knew those dark eyes were actually focused on him and snapped, "Really Sirius? You look around this room and you tell me with a straight face you actually believe you would do anything to get them killed." Remus waited a beat for the fog to clear and a look of indignation to cross back over his face before nodding and pushing him back, snapping, "now knock it off before I put you out of your misery."

Harry couldn't help but release a surprised burst of laughter at what he considered an empty threat. You didn't need to know these boys long to recognize an empty threat towards one of their own.

All three of his friends frowned at that comparison, knowing they'd likely have cursed anyone who had said that about their friend. Peter was just as much a Marauder as any of them. Always coming up with the getaway strategy for their pranks and usually considered one of the sneakiest Gryffindors most had met, his jumpy actions now didn't change anything to them one jot.

"Maybe not in her class," Remus frowned in annoyance, knowing that Peter had rather excelled in other subjects such as Ancient Runes and Arithmancy.

Sirius couldn't help a teasing smirk light up his features, knowing he'd just love taking the mickey out of Peter for McGonagall showing her soft side when he came up.

Then Sirius let out a choking noise like his throat had just closed shut. It hadn't really linked together yet... but 'twelve muggles and one wizard.' 'Peter went after him'...

"Dang it, he stopped breathing again!" Came from a very loud voice on his left, was that James jabbing him in the ribs? Least it wasn't Remus that time. "Sirius?" Crap that was his name, he should probably respond if he could remember how to say anything other than muttering, ",I ki-killed..."

"Course you didn't you idiot," Remus ground out from his other side. "I'm still half convinced this was an imposter or...something else that did the attack to begin with."

Sirius decided that if he ever met a boggart this would probably be his now, the mental image of him killing one of his very best friends, but Remus was right. He could never actually attack him, clearly someone had the wrong information here, so ignoring that his teeth were still trying to chatter out of his skull he still read intelligibly.

All four of them shivered, pity filling every one of them for Peter in that moment as they were all convinced that James was right, Peter was just reacting and flipping out and blaming the nearest available person. Surely this imposter had cursed Sirius to keep up charades, there wasn't any other option!

That didn't even begin to cover their shock and heartache at hearing Peter's fate. Because of the miracle that Sirius and Remus had survived, they'd almost been thinking the same of their last friend. It was such a tiny little hope that none of them had even dared think it before now, but it was always there in the back of their mind that surely one of them had survived the war and come out okay. Now that they heard this, that Peter had lost his life the same day Sirius' world had ended, was yet another terrible blow to their world view.

Everyone except Harry, who was beside himself trying to stop word vomit from causing him to collapse to the ground. Something so wrong was going on here, it didn't seem possible at this point he could control the pain, but when his mother reached over and cupped his hand in loving warmth, recognizing how much pain he was in from trying to control this, though she was honestly under the false impression that it was the pain of learning all this rather then his forced back memories, he held on just that little bit longer so as not to break down.

Sirius bitterly remembered mockingly thinking that he was going to kill Peter if he was alive for not coming around for Harry. Now he really meant it when he decided he was going to kill the bastard who had dared to really do that to his friend.

James sadly wanted to agree, thinking it may have saved his friend's life, but he didn't think he could get the words out without bursting into tears as well.

Sirius cocked his head to the side at what he considered a very real threat. Honestly at this point he still felt sick enough with himself he might have taken Hagrid up on that offer, but he was worried it may result in another slap from one of his friends so he didn't say that aloud.

"Don't," Lily said sharply when she registered an almost smug look creep across Sirius' face. She felt bad at once for telling him off for a joke she didn't really think was in good taste, because she'd have rather heard that then the sultry voice he slipped back into the moment he turned back to the book.

'Merlin what kind of soul could do that' the others bitterly thought. Of course there were a few more important questions they wanted answered, like who had really done this, how had they really framed Sirius for that mess. Why for that matter? Was it because he was a Black and it was more believable, or because he was so openly against Voldemort despite his family name he was an easy target? James wand appeared in his hand and he kept tapping it against his thigh in agitation that he didn't have a name to curse into oblivion for the cause of all of this mess.

That wasn't any comfort to anyone in this room, but it was a nice thought anyways for what their friend might have been trying to do. Maybe if whatever hadn't gone so brutally wrong, Peter and Sirius both would have gotten that for stopping this massacre.

Sirius felt a horrible twitch under his skin, like he really wanted to remember that on top of everything else he'd just learned, but he pressed down on any further questions that sprung to mind so he could finish this nightmare.

'Pretty sure this whole ordeal unhinged him, not to mention where he'd be staying wouldn't help' Lily mentally sighed, but refrained from voicing that.

'And the worst mistake that person ever made in their life' Remus vowed, personally wondering where he'd been in all of this mess. He must have followed up on this, tried to figure out what really happened and what could have happened to Sirius, try to get revenge against the real person who'd killed his friend and all of those innocent people, but he had no ideas right now.

Sirius released a surprised snort of laughter, one hundred percent certain bored was the last thing he'd been feeling in that hell hole and wondering what on earth he'd been thinking trying to make pleasant conversation with the Minister.

Harry on the other hand gave a surprised jerk, frowning and rubbing at his temple. There it was again, something about Sirius and the paper. There was a key in there, a connection he was missing, but the others were still absorbed enough they didn't seem to notice he was distracted.

"There will not be a time I won't want to curl in on myself and cry at the thought of that, but thanks for the reminder," Sirius muttered to himself as he checked how much was left, and gave a blessed sigh of relief when he saw this was almost done.

James sighed and laid his face in his hands, more than tired of repeating himself about how stupid that was, but refrained from saying it again for the sake of getting this done.

"Ha." Harry said lightly, shaking his head from side to side at how absurd that sounded to him. This gave the others a little more life to cling on to, Harry finding that sentence laughable was a very good omen for how this should all play out in the end.

Lily couldn't help but release a surprised snort of laughter at how lightly all of this seemed to be taken by everyone but them. She'd personally hold down the loon who thought they could mess with her family and get away with it, and the fact that these teachers took this matter as a passing side story was pretty insulting to her.

That was pretty accurate to how everyone else in the room felt as well.

* * *

*That is the actual response from JK herself as to how the twins worked that out. I personally had another headcanon for this, but she's the boss.

**Nickname suggested for James by Shakira94 and MelodyGirl239 but I thought it suited Harry a bit more.

I am a proud owner of my own Marauder's Map, which I've stared at for so many hours I'm convinced my dot will appear on it!


	11. THE FIREBOLT

Sirius was still staring vacantly down at the book in his hands as if fearing it was going to leap up and rip his face off any second, so taking pity on him Harry got to his feet and offered his hand out for the book. When he still didn't respond to that, Harry leaned over and gently tugged the book out of his slack grip, but before he could head back to his spot to read James voiced, "It's getting pretty late into the night. How about we take a break for food?"

Lily nodded in agreement and Harry was happy to follow her into the kitchen and help again, leaving the three stunned boys in place.

Finding out James was dead was one of the most heart-wrenching things his friends had ever considered. Of course they weren't naive, they recognized they would all die eventually, but the manner in which it was to come, and so soon, had terrified them from the very beginning. Now here they were, yet again, to find another of theirs lost too soon for this life, and for what? Because Peter had panicked and tried to confront Sirius, only for the matter to be blown into historical proportions? Where was the justice in that? The bloodlust it ensued in the friends to find out who'd done this to their friend was hardly contained even now as they sat in a stewing silence.

In the kitchen, Harry was having a more pleasant chat with his mother. "I didn't know Sirius was my Godfather. How come you guys haven't mentioned it?"

Lily thought back for a moment to realize they hadn't outright told him this before nodding and saying, "guess it just hadn't crossed our mind to tell you dear. There are plenty of little things like that, just passing comments we hardly realize you wouldn't get. Sorry love, but now you know."

Harry chuckled for a moment, passing her something and inspecting this bubbling warmth that this seemed to cause him. He had a Godfather? He obviously knew now why Sirius hadn't been there for him through the years, but something about realizing this made him smile. Of course his thirteen-year-old self had been devastated at the news, but right now all he could think of was, what if Sirius' name really did get cleared? His family seemed very sure this was going to happen, and he had no reasons to doubt them. If that did happen, then that could very possibly mean he would leave the Dursleys? He may actually regain memories of a home life he was only getting a glimpse of now?

His gut wanted to argue the point, there was no settling feeling saying his thoughts now had any concrete to them, but the mood of this book had been so low for so long now, he refused to let himself ruin this fantasy and would cling to it for as long as possible.

Dinner was mostly a silent affair, the shock still weighing heavily on all of them as Harry went to pick the book back up. Now that he at least partially knew what had been bothering him about that trip into Hogsmeade Harry's mind had settled down some, though that lingering prickle that he was still missing something left him with an anxious feeling as he began to read.

Sirius winced at his remembered light joke of before, hating how this book seemed to continue twisting and mocking his very being.

'Because the one who should have wasn't around' Remus bitterly thought, wanting to curse himself nearly as much as anyone else the more this dragged on.

"Arthur might not have known," Lily said fairly "I'm fairly sure he doesn't even know you two, and as Fudge did say, this didn't really seem that widely known."

Harry nodded in understanding, knowing he hadn't held this against the Weasley's, though feeling rather certain he had wanted to demand this from someone.

Both James and Remus gave Sirius a very careful look, noticing at once how his hands twisted up in his lap at the implication, but he seemed to have taken Remus' words to heart at least somewhat. Sirius just had to know he'd never do anything like this, accidentally or not, so Harry didn't let that horrid question linger.

Lily crinkled up her nose in disgust, not really understanding how stinking up the common room would make them feel better, but knowing this behavior all too well from her own boys. If given half the chance, the present Marauders would cause mayhem in the school right now to get rid of some built up tension; but they weren't in school anymore, and they were having to learn to cope with this in other ways.

All three boys gave a horrible jerk at that, disgusted that something like Harry's first trip into Hogsmeade, and the use of the map at all, would be ruined by this. It just didn't seem fair they couldn't stay happy for one whole chapter anymore.

This happy little reminder did spike up the mood at least a bit. Of course none of them had forgotten this treasured gift, and it was warming beyond belief to know Harry clearly valued it so much.

"Ah," Sirius murmured, nodding in understanding now. Harry had once mentioned he thought he knew him back when Hagrid had given him this book, at the time Harry had simply settled on the idea he must have seen a picture of him. Now they understood it was wrong, but it was still interesting to know which picture Harry had latched onto.

Sirius wanted to mock pout at that, but just couldn't raise up the energy at yet another reminder of how little Harry knew about him, and the manner that he continued learning about him hurt like a scalding knife tearing chunks out of his soul.

James and Remus couldn't even imagine it. Sirius so unrecognizable to his boisterous nature as to not be recognized like this! It was something they refused to linger on any longer than was possible.

Harry wanted to stop and give him a sorry look for ever thinking that, in his defense he hadn't actually known him at the time, but he knew it was only going to get worse so forced himself to keep going. The words would have jammed up in his throat anyways, because of that terrible spot he couldn't fix. He was convinced now more than ever Sirius had a reason for being at school, a murderous reason. It couldn't really be Harry though...right? The fact that he couldn't answer himself gave him chills as much as anything he'd been hearing.

"I sincerely doubt he actually knew that," Lily muttered sarcastically under her breath, grimacing right along with everyone else at these implausible questions.

"Maybe not while I'm a dog," Sirius sighed, still vacantly wondering why he had acted so normal around Fudge. Surely it was just because he was starved for attention.

Sirius winced anew that his face had at any time caused such a horrible reaction to Harry, but the boy sounded so miserable in that moment he didn't want to say anything for fear of making it worse.

'Can't hardly blame him' Remus thought sadly, 'everyone wants to be alone sometimes.'

"I'm sorry Sirius," Harry couldn't stop himself this time, his wide green eyes looking the opposite of hatred in that moment. He clearly felt guilt ridden about ever thinking something like this when now he instinctively knew just how wrong he was. He was forcefully ignoring that other part of him, Sirius must have a reason for this, no man who looked as guilt stricken upon hearing of all this could really have done these things.

"S'alright Harry," Sirius sighed, trying to put some feeling into his voice even as he rubbed at his face, trying to force this stiff almost frozen expression of a scowl away. "Not like I can really do anything to fix it, least you're not thinking it for the rest of your life, that's all that really matters."

James couldn't help but give Sirius a reassuring pat on the shoulder all the same, like he was trying to reward him for the attempt even if it did come out a little hollow anyways.

All three of them made a horrible choking noise at that horrible sentence, like it wasn't bad enough hearing it the first time, but now realizing Harry was going to sit around and think about it nearly as much as thinking about his Mother gave each of them a deep desire to blast their own memories of this particular pain. Maybe if Harry didn't feel so wretched for what he was currently putting Sirius through he would have focused a little more on how odd and just plain wrong that sentence was for him to say, his gut giving an absent nudge of pain going unnoticed.

"Not a bad comparison really," James said a little too loudly, looking for anything to take his mind off of this topic. "Wish you could get to know Neville a little better all the same."

Harry nodded in agreement, having a fairly good feeling his friendship with his fellow Gryffindor only gets stronger through the years.

Sirius had a fairly good idea that type of reminder would never not feel like a stab to the heart.

"Oh thank you, because I'm sure that made him feel so much better," Remus rolled his eyes.

Lily had to bite at her lip to stop herself from voicing the opinion if this continued he really should go and visit Madam Pomphrey for some sort of dreamless potion to help with this restlessness. The only thing restraining her was the reminder of how rarely Harry actually sought out help, and she doubted this time would really be different.

"Probably had one to many of those," James muttered randomly.

Sirius was more than happily distracted by letting out a low whistle and admitting, "almost forgot how many classes she was in, Merlin it's a bloody miracle she even takes the chance to go to Hogsmeade. You'd think she'd have to be doing homework twenty-four seven to keep up."

"Can't rightly blame them," Lily said with some forced cheerfulness, more than happy Harry's friends were at least looking out for him, or trying to, with staying behind.

"I'm sure that made him feel just as swell the second time," Remus snorted in real amusement.

"Stupid like what?" James demanded in disbelief. "What exactly do they think you're going to do with this new information, except to rightly sulk a bit."

Harry just shrugged, he remembered that poisonous hatred hadn't exactly worn off, but he'd no real idea what or how he was supposed to channel it at that time, so what Hermione actually thought he was going to do he didn't know.

"That would be a sight," Remus rolled his eyes at that mental image.

"I still insist Harry might really win that fight," Sirius joked lightly, half wishing Harry would do this anyways. It was high time someone gave Harry some real facts, which he was sure he could deliver, rather than all of this tosh he kept getting.

"You're friends never cease to amuse me," Lily chuckled. "Who rehearses this type of conversation?" Privately she was warmed that Harry had such caring friends they were so worried about Harry like this, despite how misguided it was, as Harry really should be allowed to be as angry as he wanted about this mess.

'Guess it's a good thing he tells someone' James mentally sighed, bracing himself to hear this living nightmare all over again.

'I probably will be a real murderer when Harry really does get that name' Sirius mentally snarled, but kept that one to himself for fear of the retribution his friends would give him.

'Gotta love Hermione's faith in him' Remus frowned without any real heat, knowing Hermione was speaking without all the facts, but detesting anyone saying this about his friend.

"Can't even say that's harsh, I'm thinking something similar about the person who did do this," James scowled.

Harry didn't offer an opinion now anymore than he did then. At the time he really couldn't claim he would have batted an eye if that did happen, now the very thought of it caused a horrible twist inside of him. He lacked commenting this though, because he didn't think Sirius would appreciate the first answer anymore then his memory would appreciate him poking at an echo of pain he didn't know how to dwell on.

"I'm honestly curious what you really will do," Sirius couldn't help but chuckle, knowing Harry was doing it for all the wrong reasons, but willing to encourage anything that would get the two of them in the same room alone.

"What's this?" Remus asked curiously, trying to cast his mind around for the last time Harry had spoken to Malfoy.

"Oh," they all muttered, frowning all over again. None of them really wanted to consider Malfoy a credible source for anything, but the fact that a Death Eater would know about this instance really struck a nerve. It even crossed James mind that, what if it had been a Death Eater to orchestrate this whole thing? He found this the most likely scenario yet, but he wanted to think on it a while more before he offered it to the others.

"Harry's hardly 'taking his advice', he's just noting something from before," Remus frowned, rather as annoyed by this as Ron that Malfoy would have any involvement.

"Ew," Lily muttered, trying to force that mental image out of her mind rather than bursting into tears that this was a fate of someone she considered a friend. Her reaction was mild compared to Peter's friends, who had gone a pasty color and looked more likely to vomit the longer this was talked about.

Harry was blinking spastically down at the page, like his Mum trying his very hardest to push something away, in his case a feeling of significance. Something about this, a single finger… then a headache began forming again and he forced himself to keep reading.

"Half wish you'd actually ignored all of what he'd said," Sirius muttered, thinking he'd have been more than happy if they'd never learned that bit of trivia.

"And that still hasn't gotten old," Remus muttered for his own amusement, at this point fairly certain Harry never was going to start doing that and the reactions from others would continue. Which mostly caused pride in him, finding Harry's resistance against this a very good parallel to his father.

"I want to curse Ron into a million pieces," Lily snarled, somehow managing to find Ron's crude humor in even more poor a taste then Sirius' of late.

"Harry can beat him with one arm behind his back," James chirped, causing bursts of still dulled amusement from all of them. The mantra of 'they could fix this' was pretty much the only thing sustaining them at this point, as the fate of their friend now seemed as hot a topic as Sirius, and they all wanted to vomit or murder someone for the continuing reminder. It seemed to hurt all the worse because Peter wasn't here now, they couldn't just glance over at their friend whenever they needed the reminder. Now they really wished they'd convinced Peter to stick around.

"Going to have to agree with Hermione on that one, under a different context anyways," Sirius huffed.

Lily said "no" at the same time as James said "yes."

The parents gave each other the stank eye for a moment before James cracked and smiled over at her, responding, "I think we technically answered a different half of her question."

Lily couldn't help but return the smile and laughed at the exchange.

"Merlin, can't have one decent moment anymore can they," Remus sighed low enough only Sirius heard him as James and Lily turned away from each other, faces dropping and biting at their lips at such a reminder, while Harry's smile dropped right out as well.

"Inquisitive little thing," Sirius grumbled, really not looking forward to another fight breaking out right now and hoping that cat would stay put.

"Not without good reason," Harry sighed in reminder, since the moment he'd read that he had an inkling of a feeling what Ron's words were fixing to cause in him then, and it wasn't good.

Maybe it was all the pent up frustration at this particular book, but the room gave a collective groan and grumble of annoyance for Hermione still trying to enforce that rule.

James sucked in air backwards through his teeth, creating a sound effect that made it obvious he very dearly didn't want to sit in on this conversation.

"Curse irony," Sirius scowled, still not really over the fact that he normally loved the full attention being on him, and the way it kept getting thrown in his face like this. Remus gave him a gentle nudge in pity, having a pretty good idea what Sirius' little comment meant and both agreeing with him and unable to think of anything to make him feel better.

Lily had to do a double take before reminding herself of the current portrait, then frowned when she realized why hadn't the Fat Lady come back yet? Exactly how badly had Sirius hurt her painting? The boys looked so miserable over there though, she wondered if they even registered this, and she wasn't going to be the one to bring it up.

"Wouldn't put it past him," Remus shrugged, "I'm sure the holidays leave him rather busy with both of his jobs."

"Is-is that Fang crying?" Sirius frowned, thinking that wasn't really how a dog would be described to cry, but really unsure as to why it would be Hagrid.

James thumped Sirius on the ear for what he considered a stupid comment.

"Oh no," Lily cooed at once, wanting to wrap Hagrid in a hug even if her arms wouldn't reach all the way around. They'd all felt some pretty mild annoyance at Hagrid's part in the story in the last chapter, but they could hardly sit there and blame him more than anyone else when it was clear McGonagall and every other person in the world believed Sirius had done all of that as well. So their first reaction to hearing Hagrid was upset was an equal amount of concern as Harry, all of them deciding they really couldn't hold a grudge against someone who had done so much for Harry.

"Heard what?" Remus muttered, getting jittery at once for what other possible bad thing could happen.

It was a good thing Hagrid still seemed to have some sense of himself, as they were all sure Ron and Hermione's combined strength really couldn't have done this if he hadn't wanted to.

"The poor dear," Lily began fretting, her first instinct to get to her feet and make him a nice hot cup of tea so that he could tell her what the problem was. She only hoped Hermione or one of the boys would think to do something like this as well.

"Oh crap," they all muttered, having nearly forgotten the whole incident. It hadn't happened that long ago, but considering the things they learned since then it may as well have been a life time. The whole thing had pretty much lost its impact, but clearly there had been further repercussions then what they'd been expecting.

"Well there's that," Lily let out a breath of relief.

"So what's wrong with Hagrid?" James frowned, leaning forward in concern.

Sirius proceeded to call Mr. Malfoy quite a few colorful terms, and Lily felt so upset on Hagrid's part she couldn't even find it in her to scold him for it.

"They want him to take a hippogriff into London?" Harry reread his mind scattering around for something that didn't make him squirm in displeasure. This was very clearly what had Hagrid so upset, and the thought of one of his friends in this state truly did cause him to want to pursue action. The random question was just to give him time to think, though at the time he'd been more shell shocked at the events and knew he hadn't said anything.

"It's not impossible," James answered with a heavy sigh. "I'm sure someone will cast a spell on him, disguise him as a regular horse until he gets inside or something."

"Why do they want Buckbeak to be there at all? They can hardly ask him what happened," Sirius added on his own question.

This wasn't Lily's particular department, but she took a swing anyways and offered, "most likely they might try and gauge his attitude, try and see for themselves how dangerous he truly is. Test him a bit before they give a proper ruling."

Harry found the subject rather fascinating, but knew better than to try and linger on the subject when he really wanted his answers from the book on what was going to happen.

"They really should," Remus agreed, rubbing the back of his neck in thought. "Honestly the whole instance was Malfoy's fault, so if Lucius didn't have so much 'influence' it might not have even gotten this far."

"This is actually pretty similar to what happens when a muggles dog bites someone," Lily shrugged, "so I might disagree with you on that, but I've never dealt with anything like this personally so I don't know all the details."

"I want to call a biased opinion on that," James muttered, "but in this case, Hagrid's right. Buckbeak really wasn't at full fault."

"Actually I'm in full agreement with Hagrid," Sirius shrugged, "that Committee really is too analytical when it comes to a very broad topic. They think they can make rules to cover every instance, and it's just not possible when dealing with live animals."

Harry watched curiously when it looked like Remus was about to jump in, and the boys looked like they were going to start a whole debate on the matter, but then Lily cleared her throat with a warm smile and said, "we can pick this up later boys, I'd like to get this chapter done before midnight."

They all rolled their eyes but backed down all the same.

"Lovely," Remus crinkled up his nose at the thought, but couldn't really blame Hagrid for this either.

"Aw," Lily smiled brightly, she thought this was adorable and wouldn't put it past herself to think the same of her own pet.

"I'll give Harry full points for that spot on comparison," James nodded with amusement.

Sirius scowled and muttered a few things about how the system worked, which no one really argued him on at this point.

"Not really sure Dumbledore could do anything in this instance," Remus frowned thoughtfully, "he wasn't there. Sure he could vouch for Hagrid's opinion on the matter; maybe his presence would hold as much weight as Malfoy's."

"Let's hope then," Lily nodded in agreement.

"Well now I just feel awful, taking time away from a very important matter," Sirius said sincerely. James and Remus couldn't tell how sarcastic he was being, but at least he hadn't flinched when his name was mentioned this time, so that was progress.

"Oh yeah," they muttered, that having been the original reason for this visit, and really hoping Harry wouldn't turn this back. While the case of Buckbeak wasn't a happy topic, it was still loads better then what Harry wanted.

"You are such a sweet boy," Lily smiled at her son, taking a moment to brush her hand through his hair at this bout of thoughtfulness.

Harry couldn't help but blush but couldn't deny that he did appreciate the affection all the same.

"Why am I not surprised Hermione has read a book on this," Remus chuckled.

"I think her life's goal is to read every book in the world," Sirius smirked.

"Thank you Ron," Lily beamed.

The boys were too busy laughing at such a random input.

"Must be a girl thing," Sirius snickered, ignoring the haughty look from said woman.

"Turns out to be a rather good thing you came down there," James beamed. "I'd feel wretched if Hagrid had been down there by himself like this all through the holidays."

"Good things can come from the most unexpected places," Remus smirked.

"Enough fortune cookies from you," Sirius rolled his eyes at him.

"Can you blame us," Harry sighed, then he added on, "course I can't hardly blame Hagrid, it's not actually his fault."

The boys couldn't help but snicker at this, finding Ron's reaction adorable to the many lies they'd pulled off by this time in their life.

"How on earth will the class live with themselves?" Sirius smirked, not bothering one bit to pretend like that was a real question.

Sirius blinked spastically, for the first time coming back to that random connection. While he'd yet to ever go to Azkaban himself, and here's praying he never would, he was pretty sure it was a big place and the odds he'd been around Hagrid during that time were slim. Mostly it reminded him of Lily's snippy little threat from back during the beginning of the second book, and how not funny that was anymore.

"Just can't stay off this topic for more than five minutes lately," James scowled, wanting to block Sirius' ears from having to continually hear about this. He figured that would only result in a wrestling match that neither of them would win, which would only annoy Lily, so he restrained himself.

"That's one of his worst memories," Remus couldn't help but blurt out.

"Wow, think we underestimated how much he liked that dragon," Sirius shuddered in renewed disgust. As if mentioning all of this wasn't bad enough, now he had that dragon reminder to deal with on top of everything.

Sirius was leaning so far into the couch he seemed to be trying to merge with it, his vacant hands kept patting his knees or twisting in his lap as he continued trying very forcibly to not think about himself in this situation, plenty of his worst memories already coming to mind, more clearly to come…

James and Remus exchanged heart wrenched looks, but what could they really say? There were only so many times they could help him and try to convince him they weren't going to let this happen to him, but it was disturbing them far more than anything to see how much this affected him. Sirius wasn't known for letting things get to him, so the severe reaction he continued to have to this, something he must know they refused to allow, was scaring them more than anything.

"That could work," Sirius said loudly, anything to keep the conversation away from that prison. "Just say he got loose and flew away, they really couldn't say otherwise."

"I suppose it depends on how loyal Buckbeak is to Hagrid," Remus shrugged, more than happy to play along for as long as possible. "Because if Buckbeak ever decided to come back, and Malfoy noticed, it would cause more harm than good."

Lily's heart broke into tiny little pieces upon hearing that. It was bad enough watching Sirius being forced to listen to this ordeal, now Hagrid was having just as many issues and she couldn't help either of them. It made her feel helpless, not a feeling Lily Potter ever enjoyed. There must be some way to fix all of this, make it so that such a place as Azkaban couldn't even be an option. While she'd heard of some gruesome stories of people who she had considered did deserve that place, now that she'd heard of two separate instances of people wrongly being in there, she was beginning to question the place as a whole.

"There's the bright side," James rolled his eyes with forced laughter, happy for any brief change in the mood.

"You three have got to be the only students who use the library so frequently," Remus chuckled. "All three years now, and you lot have had a reason to go in and grab seemingly random books. Most students just use it for homework."

"I'll take that as a compliment," Harry chuckled.

"I do not want to know," Lily frowned, more than happy when Harry continued on without the added comment of what did happen.

"That's a great idea," Sirius snorted, "let's make Buckbeak so scary no one wants to go near him, I'm sure he'll live a long and happy life."

"The worst part is, I still can't tell if you're kidding," Remus frowned at him, which Sirius ignored.

="They'd put those up if no students stayed," James shrugged, "I think the teachers enjoy doing it for themselves honestly."

"Poor little thing," James snickered.

"Hope Ron slips him something nice," Remus agreed.

"Well that was pleasant," Lily snickered.

"Sincerely doubt Harry would mind," Sirius pointed out.

"Please tell me he actually thanks his mother for that, no matter the color," Lily rolled her eyes.

"I'm getting the sense of no," Remus smirked.

"Now see, why couldn't she have just done that for Ron, I'm sure he would have found that much cooler," Sirius rolled his eyes.

Lily relished this gift while it lasted, trying to brace herself as much as possible for the horrid gift she was now expecting from the Dursleys.

"A broomstick?" James repeated so loudly, Sirius started to rub his ear in annoyance before his eyes lit up like Christmas as well.

"What kind?" Sirius demanded at once nearly as loud as James just had.

"Who sent it?" Remus demanded, nearly bouncing in place in excitement.

Lily had started by giggling, she couldn't help it at their childlike delight of something like this, though even her son looked nearly as deliriously happy at this prospect, but at Remus' question it gave them all a brief pause to turn that over.

"Must have been me," Sirius shrugged, "I really can't think up anyone else."

"I'll buy that," James nodded eagerly. "No think about it," he persisted when Lily didn't look convinced, "Remus most likely told Sirius that Harry had lost his broom after Sirius had left, and do you really think Sirius wouldn't buy Harry anything less than another broomstick?"

"How would he pay for it though," Lily countered, this being the only thing she was really stuck on. "I doubt he's carrying around that kind of gold on him."

"There are ways to access your account without withdrawing in person," Remus reminded. "Personally I agree, I can see Sirius doing this easily."

Harry was laughing with giddy excitement, feeling very sure indeed they were right on the spot with this one. He decided to risk it and told them as much aloud, causing the brightest smile in hours to appear on all of them, more than making up for the sharp spike of pain Harry received for that memory returning early. He didn't care though, he'd do it again in a heartbeat his family looked so happy for something like this to have happened to him.

James and Sirius nearly passed out from overloaded excitement. Harry had just gotten an international broomstick! The very one they'd been drooling over during his summer holidays! It was too good to be true.

Then Remus burst out laughing watching Sirius, and only continuing when he demanded to know what was so funny. "You-" he finally choked out in between chuckles "-you would catch up on the latest model of brooms. I'm just sitting here imagining you grabbing hold of the nearest paper and checking all the Quidditch League Status' and-" he trailed off again, causing everyone else to laugh along. Sirius wasn't even going to try and deny he was obsessed enough with his sport he would have gone out of his way to update himself like this as soon as possible. Merlin, he wouldn't have put it past himself to go and buy two of those things, one for Harry and one for himself.

James and Sirius were shivering in place, looking like at any second they were going to get to their feet and run to the nearest Quidditch store to get their own. Lily was still giggling from before, doubling up now at how enthusiastic they were being. Remus restrained himself from reminding them this hadn't actually come out yet.

"The best Godfather in the world," James hooted, clutching Sirius up and hugging him tightly. Sirius made no point of denying it, he was still laughing to hard.

Harry couldn't help but laugh at his own joke now, pleased to see that even the mention of them hadn't brought his family's mood back down.

"I don't see that happening," Lily disagreed, "or any of the teachers, like McGonagall; otherwise they would have done it not long after you lost your broom. Sirius would have waited until now, less publicly so there's not as much scrutiny of it."

"That's not the same thing," James shook his head, "that was yours by birthright."

"There's that too," Remus nodded, "can't be showing favoritism like this."

All four boys lost it again, laughing raucously at the thought of such a prat like Malfoy, and the way he'd acted last year about having a superior broom, and now Harry was going to outstrip him by a mile. He hadn't even done anything like ask for it!

Lily very dearly wanted to make a comment about how Sirius was spoiling Harry just a bit, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. One, she was still giggling too much to sound too intelligibly. The foul mood from before being gone like this now left them all slightly in hysterics. Two, she honestly believed Harry did deserve it, if for no other reason than she thought this may have been Sirius' way of trying to give back a lot of missed presents on his part.

"I wouldn't put it past you to give me the idea," Sirius reminded him, still snickering away like a fool. "So I think that means it technically came from both of us."

"Can't deny that," Remus muttered, refusing to let the good mood be dampened again by this kind of comment, so saying that with as much good humor as he could muster.

"I doubt he would have been doing much traveling at the time, but I like what Ron was trying," James shrugged.

'Yet another thing to hate Snape for' Sirius finally started to frown again, more than annoyed at that pompous git. It seemed to him like he was just trying to set Harry in particular to figure this out, which made him want to punch that greasy git in the face.

Remus couldn't help but smile, glad to see Harry hadn't read into that too closely, unlike his father. Whenever he'd used the excuse that he really had felt sick, and James had gone and seen he wasn't in the hospital wing, well that had taken some explaining to do. While Harry had reacted just fine now to him, he still couldn't help the mounting fear of what Harry may have thought of him at some point.

"Makes any pet grumpy," Sirius snickered.

"And what if Seamus doesn't appreciate that?" James randomly commented.

"I swear, she is the most pessimistic kid," Remus rolled his eyes. "Who wouldn't be bouncing around in sheer joy at finding out something like this?"

"Be nice," Lily sighed without any real heat.

"Quite good indeed," Sirius wiggled in pleasure, finding that the understatement of Hermione's life.

"Fair comparison," James nodded in agreement.

"If I didn't know otherwise, I'd rightly be as suspicious as Hermione in this instance," Lily defended her when it looked like one of the boys were going to say something again.

"Harry will be the worst kind of person in the world if you say no," Sirius told him with a straight face.

Harry pretended like he was deliberating for a moment, but it didn't last when James snorted and said, "please, we're talking about the same kid who bought a cart load of candy and split it with Ron before he knew him. Have you ever actually seen him be selfish, about anything?"

Sirius hadn't really meant it anyways, but he was still snickering in amusement all the same.

"Well not in the dorms obviously," Remus rolled his eyes, knowing what Hermione had meant, and beginning to feel a pit forming when he realized this might start going in a bad direction.

"I'd have heart failure," James shuddered in disgust at the very thought.

"Uh-oh," the room muttered as one, knowing this couldn't be a good thing.

Sirius continued reading in a rather harassed tone, very concerned indeed this may not play out as well as last time.

James sighed, knowing he probably would have found that rather amusing under any other circumstances.

"Wait, what?" Remus demanded in confusion.

"Why would that be going off now?" Sirius pondered, casting his mind around for anything that could answer it.

"How long of a range has it got?" James prodded. "Did it say the twins had stayed over the holidays? Perhaps there up to something in their dorm?"

The others shrugged, they really had no further explanation.

"Stinks that it goes off so easily," Lily smiled sadly, "Ron's gift doesn't seem to be doing much good."

They all grave a breath of relief, more then pleased no one had gotten further hurt by this, though it still didn't answer the lingering question of how many more times this could happen before something irreversible did occur.

"Poor little guy," Sirius muttered in sympathy, feeling rather awful that at this rate, Scabbers might not even make it to Easter break.

James winced, having a suspicious feeling that it was more likely old age then anything and Ron was just looking for any excuse to put that aside.

"Well at least you realize that Harry," Remus sighed, "might make it an easier transition for Ron if his friend tries to make him understand that to."

Harry nodded, but he wasn't really listening. Why was it the longer Scabbers was mentioned, the more ill will he had for him? When he'd initially thought this, he'd always wondered whether Scabbers had bit him at some point and he'd just resented it, but now he wasn't so sure. There was yet another something he was missing, a piece to a huge missing puzzle that would continue to drive him crazy until he had a full answer. He tried testing his feelings on it, but all he got was a comparable feeling he'd had for Sirius at his age of thirteen. This made no sense what so ever, he must be confusing the two.

"I'm sure you're right indeed," Lily sighed in trepidation for the moment that was sure to come about.

"Really Hermione, really?" James ground out. "What on earth made her think it was even a good idea to bring him up there, when she knew full well what that cat would try."

"A worthy use of time," Sirius nodded in agreement, looking for any excuse to get the good mood back in swing. One chapter, that's all he wanted, one chapter where he could actually enjoy the whole thing.

"Everything annoys Hermione this year," James scoffed.

"Homework overload," Sirius offered in his wise old voice, causing at least Harry and Remus to chuckle.

"Now that'd be a nifty trick," Remus smirked.

While Lily agreed Hermione may have been going about her actions the wrong way this year, she still didn't really appreciate her boys' attitude towards her any better. Yet she couldn't come up with a way to tell them off for it that would actually make a difference.

James let out a low, throaty whistle in surprise as he said, "not even that many people left Hogwarts last year."

"Castle used to be this deserted some years for us," Remus shrugged in remembrance, "we personally found it entertaining." He finished with a gesture at Sirius who nodded enthusiastically.

"Urgh," Sirius muttered, "rather he just go casual then."

Remus randomly noted that it couldn't have been the twins who had made the Sneakoscope go off then, if the twins weren't there and apparently Harry, Ron and Hermione were the only ones there, but then what on earth would cause the thing to go off now? It couldn't be set off by an animal could it, had it been set off by Crookshanks' untrustworthy attempts to eat Scabbers? No one else really seemed to notice this, and he wasn't even sure if this was what really was going on, so he decided against saying anything and might have really put it down to a faulty one.

"I think it would have been more of a sight," Remus shrugged, "get to stretch out a bit more."

"Oh boy," James whispered, brows shooting up in excitement as all kinds of possibilities for that scenario played out in his mind.

The five of them lost it all over again, the abrupt reminder causing quite the laughing fit for a moment before Harry gained his breath back and kept reading with a wide stupid grin still in place.

"You lot have much more control than us," Sirius gasped, still massaging at his now abused ribs.

Sirius refused to let his sour mood be ruined then, but he couldn't help but grumble when he realized he once would have loved Dumbledore's random reaction to this, but couldn't shake the reminder that Dumbledore hadn't trusted him! He doubted that smarting would go away anytime soon.

Sirius and James perked up, having noticed one teacher in particular being absent, and more than pleased if it said Remus would take a seat near Harry.

"Rats," James sat back with a pout, this not having been the teacher he'd had in mind.

Sirius didn't bother to smother his amused chuckling at the description one bit.

"She saw herself, doing something she would decide to do?" Remus demanded, rather puzzled by the whole thing.

"I don't question her to deeply," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Wow," Harry blinked in mild surprise at such an advanced level of magic to him.

James released a surprised snort of laughter at all of the hilarity this could cause. Then again, it was a wonder those two were sitting beside each other in the first place.

"How do you softly scream?" Lily snickered.

"I'm sure it's just as dramatic as it sounds," James smirked right back.

"I've never heard that," Remus said with mild interest.

"I have," Sirius said with amusement, "it's a superstition I heard years ago, don't know how real to take it."

"About as real as her whole subject," James rolled his eyes.

Lily's shoulders started shaking with suppressed laughter, as James spoke out loud with just as much amusement, "don't know what she's so worried about. If she's that freaked, her solution is just to not rise first. I'm sure she can manage that."

Lily couldn't help but wrinkle her nose up at the thought of that particular food item, but couldn't deny she was intrigued by who at the table was eating it.

"Rude," Remus sniffed lightly.

"Aw Remus, are you her dear now?" Sirius demanded at once with unsuppressed glee at this new opportunity.

"Oh please," he scoffed with a roll of his eyes, "she called Neville that to, don't be thick."

"Hush you two, I want to hear this," James snapped at the pair.

All five of their faces fell, pity welling up in them for Remus for this to happen to him on the holidays, while Remus was simply wishing no one had mentioned it at all.

"I'll say," Sirius frowned, though personally thinking that at least he was probably around him for company now.

"Oh wow," James spluttered, going wide eyed at this prospect. He'd recognized McGonagall's opinion of Trelawny back during that first class of this year, and now watching them beside each other should only get better.

"I'm so sure that's it," Lily muttered, brushing her hand across her mouth to try and hide her twitching lips.

Sirius didn't bother one bit and even released another snort of amusement for his old teachers wit.

"Looks like we know how to push her buttons," James chirped.

"Looks like Remus cares about it as much then as he does now," Sirius countered as Remus rolled his eyes at the very thought.

Lily couldn't hide it anymore and outright laughed with the others at this continued verbal exchange.

"Oh here we go again," James immediately switched from joyed amusement, to a scowl at this still unexplained phenomenon.

"Relax James," Remus said, leaning forward eagerly, "since Dumbledore's the one who brought it up, maybe they'll explain more properly this time."

"Still thank my lucky stars he's not poisoning it in the meantime," Sirius grumbled.

"And that explained, nothing," Remus scowled, leaning right back into his seat in agitation again.

James and Sirius however couldn't help but exchange a hopeful look all over again. What on earth were the odds that this mysterious potion was being given to Remus two times in a row when it was obvious to them these were the times of his full moon. Maybe they'd been a little too quick to dismiss there original theory, maybe it did have something to do with his lycanthropy? Still neither of them spoke this to anyone, far too anxious they really might get there friends hopes up for nothing.

"Poor kid," Lily nodded in sympathy, knowing that could be quite intimidating.

"Oh boy," Sirius grinned lightly.

"As if she wasn't convinced enough you were going to die," James rolled his eyes in disdain that Harry had so happened to be the one to make this come up again.

"A double murder it is then, unless them doing this undermines the terms of her prediction," Sirius rolled his eyes good naturedly.

"Never thought I'd see the day, but I miss her," James cackled at her continued commentary of this.

"Can't rightly blame her, that was a little rude," Lily shrugged, still smiling along.

"Now what's she up to?" Remus asked curiously.

"Probably looking for a way to keep Crookshanks somewhere else, or I should hope," Lily rolled her eyes, hoping someone would step up and put better measures in place so that scene before wouldn't keep happening.

Which gave them all a little snicker of amusement all over again, only hoping Ron was just joking.

"Well thank Merlin for that," Lily nodded seriously, "that really was giving me a fright."

"Well at least no one's going to be guessing that," Remus grinned.

"Well I should hope so, you haven't even ridden it yet," Sirius beamed.

"Why not take it straight down to the pitch and try it out?" James demanded as if he found it ludicrous Harry hadn't already thought of this.

"We'd just eaten a full meal," Harry reminded, "we were going to head down there after the food had settled a bit." He trailed off with a bit of a frown in place, wondering why on earth he was getting a bad feeling about this, like he hadn't gotten the chance to do it?

"Someone needs to give that advice to Percy," Remus muttered in Sirius' ear, causing him to snort with laughter all over again.

"I'm going to turn green here soon, I'm so jealous," James sighed, already trying to count down the minutes when he could get his own hands on such a beautiful object.

"Wait what?" Remus yelped in shock.

"Why?" Sirius agreed with a frown already in place.

Harry was getting a very bad feeling about this, so he didn't let them theorize much before reading loudly.

"That's usually the only time she comes up there," James said with a sudden spike of concern. She couldn't possibly be up there to tell him that Sirius had been caught, had she? That would be newsworthy enough, but it would probably make him faint from terror.

This thought clearly hadn't crossed anyone else's mind, Harry was still reading on more in curiosity and a touch of confusion then outright fear.

"Oh no," Lily frowned in confusion.

"What did she do?" Sirius suddenly growled, narrowing his eyes in fury.

Remus licked his lips and looked ready to say something, but Harry forced himself to keep reading loudly over them to get a real answer.

"She did!" Remus groaned, placing his face in his hands.

"Don't." Lily cut in when it looked like James and Sirius were going to get truly upset at what this could imply. "Don't you lot sit around badgering on about this. Hermione did what she thought was right, s'not her fault she doesn't know any better. She did what anybody afraid for their friends life would do, and I'm sure McGonagall won't chuck it in the fireplace."

Sirius still muttered something under his breath, but James did marginally relax. Compared to what he'd thought was fixing to happen, this almost seemed mild in comparison.

"Must be a very interesting read I'm sure," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Under any other circumstances, I would have laughed at that," Sirius sighed, knowing how much of a Quidditch nut their old teacher could be, but knowing what this could imply, he'd rather hide that out of her sight for the rest of his life.

"If there had, you'd only freak out all the more," James rolled his eyes.

"Not sure what kind of note that would have been anyway," Sirius huffed in annoyance. "Merry Christmas from your long lost Godfather, here's a kind of apology for missing every other one of your holidays."

"You know I hate it when you do that," Remus snapped at him for the horrible joke, causing Sirius to at least sort of back down.

All five of them sighed in horrible disappointment, not at all pleased they'd been right. Yet with any hope, McGonagall wouldn't really do anything but test the broom to make sure Sirius hadn't done anything, surely she wasn't going to actually destroy the broom...right?

"Thank Merlin," Sirius sighed in relief.

"You'll have that thing back to you by the end of break," Remus smiled, "and they'll be all sorts of humiliated."

James laughed eagerly at that conversation, still more annoyed than anything Harry hadn't gotten to enjoy his gift long enough to even ride it, but so long as he got it back he'd forgive in the end.

"Oh it's not that bad," James reassured when Harry seemed to be getting a growing look of horror at what that could mean. "They don't do anything to the broom physically, they simply put it through a series of rigorous tests to make sure nothing more was done to it then the manufacturer's intended. They do it all the time to professionals to make sure they didn't try and enhance their brooms."

Harry let out a long sigh of relief, having been picturing something far more medieval and irreparable being done to his new treasured gift.

"Wish she would actually believe that," Sirius rolled his eyes.

"Uh-oh," Lily muttered, thinking that these two already had more than enough to fight about, this wasn't going to make it any better.

"Well I can say this for her," Remus grinned, "she stands by what she does."

"Oh the horror," James rolled his eyes.

"Never bleeding crossed our minds," Lily smirked.

"Chapter's over by the way," Harry shrugged, tossing the book back over to Remus, who fumbled a bit and accidentally had it crash into Sirius' head.

"Ouch," Sirius grumbled jerking the book away, "jeez, you klutz, can you even see straight to read."

"Yes," Remus snapped right back, snatching the book back and flipping to his chapter.

* * *

*It's never explicitly stated that Ron still has Scabbers in his pocket at this time, but assuming he did, that would actually put thirteen in attendance before Trelawny joined. Dumbledore was the first to rise from that then group of thirteen, and guess who died first at this table. It's not something that'll ever be brought up in fic, but it was fascinating to have that pointed out to me.


	12. THE PATRONUS

To all those asking, I'm so sorry my Archive account got deleted! It's frozen from my access until Nov. 1st, so I couldn't even post a message explaining why! I do still vow I shall have the last book up...somehow. As of now my only option left is Wattpad, but I'm not facing the very real fact it'll be pulled down from there eventually as well. I'm torn between posting the summarized version on there and risking it, or scraping the whole project and somehow reworking it, again, in a new format. Any suggestions would be appreciated, but until then, I do also apologize for not updating this in the meantime. I've been in a bit of a funk, but I'm much calmer now and still vow to keep this going on schedule!

* * *

Harry noticed with puzzled concern that Remus' hands were shaking slightly, though it steadied out some when he found his place and looked to start. He also seemed to be getting paler by the hour, and Harry couldn't help but wonder for the first time in his life when the next full moon was. They must be awful for him, since every time it seemed to come up in the book both his father and Sirius gave him concerned looks. He still felt a little too embarrassed to ask about it, and since no one else was offering up the information he let it go as Remus started.

"And I really don't blame you," James nodded with a light smirk. "I'd have thrown a fit if one of my friends did something to get my new broom taken away."

Lily frowned at him, still more defensive of the girl as she shot back, "that's hardly fair James. She was doing what she thought was right, she thought she was trying to protect Harry. I'm positive if she'd come to Harry first, he and Ron would have shot her down."

"Well don't get me wrong," James shrugged, "I'm happy Harry's got such a good friend like that, but the fact that I know it's not a problem means I get to be annoyed."

Lily let her head thump back against the couch, feeling like she was talking to a brick wall half the time instead of her husband. At least he admitted he was almost overreacting.

"Trust me, you will," Sirius said in a completely assured tone of voice. "McGonagall wouldn't dream of actually keeping that from you permanently."

"Wish someone really had explained that to you though," Remus sighed, thinking that was all Harry needed, one more thing to be worrying about.

"As if Ron didn't have reason enough to be upset with her," Lily frowned, feeling that if someone didn't step in soon and try to get these two to fix this, it could turn into something irreversible. Would Harry do this? She honestly hoped so, knowing personally how easily a friendship could slip away.

All of them were frowning now, Harry most of all as guilt began welling up in himself. At the time he'd been frustrated with her for having something like this happen, for something of his to be taken away do to someone else yet again in his life, worst of all someone he'd thought of as a friend. Now looking back and having his parents explain better to him what was actually going to happen to his broom, he recognized he'd been acting pretty harsh against someone who was only trying to help, even if she could have gone about it in a better way herself.

Lily was frowning and fidgeting, fighting down the urge to scold him for acting this way. Surely a broom wasn't more important to him than one of his friends! Then she glanced over and saw how shamefaced Harry really looked for his actions, as if given the chance he'd get up right now and go apologize to her. Lily couldn't help but smile and reached over to pat him on the knee, instead offering reassurance and saying, "don't worry love, I'm sure you two will make up. I've not seen any evidence that you'll hold a grudge long."

Harry mulled that over for a moment, trying to search internally for the emotions that supported his mom's words before turning hopeful and nodding in agreement.

"Rude," Lily huffed.

"Uh-oh," James scowled, shifting his weight around uneasily as a whole new worry seemed to be cropping up.

"What's this about?" Sirius snapped, not liking the way this was starting.

Remus didn't look any happier as he continued.

"He's not!" Sirius cried in outrage.

"Is he actually going to kick you off the team for this?" James hissed. "He's trying to cope with it, at least give him a chance!"

"Relax you two," Remus was frowning down at the pages in annoyance as well, but seeing Harry looking just as devastated as the other two he reminded them all, "I did promise to give him lessons, remember? I'm positive once Wood finds out, he'll cut Harry some slack. He's not stupid enough to really try and get a new Seeker half way through the season."

Harry looked instantly relaxed at the news, having a very good feeling Remus should be right. Sirius and James still looked outraged that the thought had even crossed Wood's mind, but acquitted it wasn't worth shouting about until it actually happened.

All of the boys released breaths of relief, that could have gone so much worse if Wood had chosen not to believe him and instead gotten a replacement to be on the safe side.

"Oh boy," Sirius grinned now, picturing Wood's reaction would be pretty similar to theirs.

"No, he got a fake one to get your hopes up," Remus rolled his eyes, sarcasm dripping from every syllable which distracted Sirius enough from making his favorite joke and instead caused him to laugh for his friends wit.

"Hopefully Wood explains the idea to you a bit more," James said eagerly, still peeved McGonagall hadn't gone into more details. "Surely he knows what she meant."

Lily narrowed her eyes in agitation, not finding it remotely funny like the boys seemed to since they all chuckled in amusement. She'd personally like to see Wood show a bit more concern than he was for his teammates, really wanting to smack him and tell him his players were more important than the game. Merlin even when she hadn't liked James she'd recognized that quality in him.

"Least he tried to be logical about it, though I do think it would be easier then they're thinking," Sirius shrugged.

"Clearly he's not going to be explaining anything," James frowned.

"Maybe the term for it went out of style," Sirius offered, "and they call it something else then. So Wood doesn't know what Harry meant."

"It's only been a dozen years or so," Remus disagreed, cocking his head to the side, "would it really change that much?"

"Only thing I can think of," Sirius shrugged, and James did as well so the boys just let it go for now.

"Hopefully McGonagall explains it to him, and Wood will turn around and explain it to Harry," Lily tried to pacify the boys who were clearly thinking far too hard on this.

"Now that's what a Magical Creatures class should always be like," Remus beamed.

"Hopefully this means Hagrid's getting himself back into the swing of things," Sirius nodded happily.

Lily couldn't help but notice the book had yet to mention Harry helping anymore about Hagrid's and Buckbeak's case, but surely that was just because he hadn't found anything of note yet.

"Here we go again," Lily groaned.

Sirius couldn't help snickering a bit, he may believe the woman might be a true Seer, but it didn't stop him from mocking the woman one bit at Harry's annoyed look for her efforts.

The mention of their favorite class this year had them all wriggling in pleasure now, absolutely positive Remus was going to nip this matter in the butt.

'As if Harry had to remind him' James mentally scoffed, having no doubt in his mind Remus must be looking forward to this just for the chance of getting to spend some time with Harry.

"Hadn't thought about that," Lily nodded in agreement.

"I've actually been thinking on it," Remus admitted with his head cocked to the side, "and I've an idea, but I'm not sure if I'll think of it then."

"Well that couldn't have been more vague if you tried," Sirius rolled his eyes. "Just tell us."

Remus debated for a moment stalling and annoying Sirius further, but it wasn't worth the headache in the end so he explained, "Well Harry's already told me what he would have seen as his greatest fear was, a dementor, so I'm wondering if I wouldn't try and hunt down another boggart for him to practice on. Of course that would mean finding one again on such short notice, but I like the idea."

"Brilliant." James agreed with a nod. "The effects wouldn't be nearly as awful as the real thing, but worse enough for him to gain experience, and be realistic enough to practice."

"Hope you do think of that then," Lily nodded in agreement.

Harry couldn't help but nod and say the same thing as his mother, having a fairly good feeling about this as well.

Remus had gone from smiling faintly that he really was on the right track to helping Harry out with this, to frowning just a bit. If anyone could figure it out, Ron was a pretty good candidate. The fact that he, being Harry's best friend, kept noticing all of this didn't bode very well for him. Surely though, if he did figure it out and tell Harry, his reaction shouldn't be any more mild than now...right?

"Remus," Sirius asked in concern when he saw how hard his friend had flinched at that. Well clearly he'd been pinning this on the wrong friend, Hermione's reaction made it perfectly obvious that she had figured it out.

"Relax Moony," James offered with a faint smile, "you said it yourself, you weren't surprised when Hermione had done that assigned homework. She really is rather bright, so I'm not too surprised she put the pieces together, but that means she's known for how many months now and hasn't said anything? Not even to Harry. Doubt she's going to now, nor has she shown to be acting any differently in your class."

To their relief Remus did nod and looked relieved by their words, enough to go on without continuing to freak out.

"Thankfully not too obvious," Lily muttered with a frown, knowing she'd be just as outraged as anyone if Remus' secret did get out. The Malfoy type parents and even just some uneducated and afraid people would have a fit, and none of them would be able to do anything about it, which might force Remus to leave and that would make every one of them angry. Most all of them were still banking on the fact that Remus really might be able to get rid of that stupid curse and really keep his job there for as long as he pleased.

Only Harry and Remus didn't really believe that, though kept it to themselves for personal reasons.

"Now that I'll disagree with," Sirius shook his head sadly, already wishing these kids would stop arguing over something he'd already forgiven Hermione for.

"Remus you're just late to everything lately," James snickered.

Remus rolled his eyes but didn't acknowledge the jab enough even to look up.

"Good to know some things don't change," Lily said affectionately at how pleased Remus looked he'd guessed right this time.

"Started slacking a bit though," James snickered, remembering Remus would usually prefer to get his homework done sooner rather than later and finding this a bit odd that he wouldn't have been doing this since Harry had asked, but perhaps the idea had just occurred to him?

Sirius couldn't help but release several surprised gasping noises that might have been laughter if he wasn't trying to talk at the same time. James looked just as amused, but seemed more able to talk as he explained, "just unable not to laugh at the mention of Remus winding up in there for any reason."

"Oh Merlin, I would have just left it in there," Sirius gasped, still looking far too giddy then what Lily thought was called for.

"I'm just impressed I referred to him as Mr. Filch," Remus rolled his eyes, knowing he probably wouldn't have been able to do that with a straight face a few years ago.

"I'm sure that was working out for you just fine," James snickered.

Harry leaned forward eagerly, knowing there was something very important he should remember about this spell, almost as if it held some kind of personal attachment to him. He'd been wanting to ask for ages what the exact name of this spell was that got rid of dementors, but had been pretty well distracted by other things so he was more than happy now to get full information about it.

"No need to be nervous pup," Sirius said bracingly, "I'm sure nothing too awful could happen."

"That was the opposite of reassuring," James grumbled to Sirius, knowing full well Harry may have been picturing the same thing as him was fixing to happen.

James chuckled in amusement as he paternally corrected, "not quite son. It produces an animal that will defend you, in fact this was the Charm we'd mentioned. If you can produce your patronus, it will actually be a good indication of what your animagus will be."

"Really?" Harry asked with high interest.

"I've never heard that," Lily disagreed, and she liked to think she was rather proficient with her charms.

"It's not proven, or one hundred percent," Sirius shrugged, "but I've yet to see it otherwise."

"So if I chose to be an animagus, there's a good chance I'd be a doe?" Lily insisted with an amused smirk.

"That would be our best guess," James nodded in agreement.

Harry couldn't help but notice Remus was being quiet now, his face rather twisted with a look of annoyance and he did want to ask why, but then Lily had continued by turning to Remus and asking, "you know I've never thought to ask, but does that mean if you turned into an animagus, you would be a wolf?"

Remus huffed and grumbled something that made Sirius flick him in the ear. He glared hotly at him before answering with a still sullen voice, "don't know, not like I can test the theory."

"Ignore him Harry, he's going to be grumpy for the rest of the night and tomorrow too," James rolled his eyes and explained for Harry's puzzled look.

Remus scowled heavily at the pair, and while Harry wanted to continue asking for specifics he thought he worked it out on his own. Hadn't they mentioned before that some things don't work on werewolves? Could this be one of them? Maybe Remus just wasn't capable of being an animagus, surely that would have fixed his problem since he'd be able to turn into his animagus rather than being a werewolf for that time period, but perhaps not or he would have done it already? Remus didn't look ready to continue talking about this either way because he continued reading loudly.

"In all fairness," Lily corrected, "when learning the charm we hardly had a dementor, real or otherwise, to practice on so you can't really be too harsh on them all."

"Wasn't saying you should be," Remus shrugged, "just making sure Harry understands this isn't going to be easy, make sure he's prepared enough."

"I got it," Harry nodded in understanding, "but if you have to create a happy memory for it to work, then how does that ward them off? Don't dementors feed on happy memories?"

Remus was actually getting some of his usual happy manner back as he explained, "forcing it on the dementor in such a concentrated, powerful form like this overwhelms it. That's why it's so powerful to do," he also couldn't help but continue cautioning, "to pull together the very thing they're taking from you and shove it back at them with all your might."

Harry nodded in understanding, not looking remotely concerned at the warning.

James couldn't help a little frown that came over him, wanting to curse and grumble that he couldn't be in any one of those memories Harry would use. Merlin he felt lucky Harry even had happy memories at this point, hopefully he'd come up with one good enough that he wouldn't have to re-experience Lily's last moments for long.

Lily made quite the murderous face herself, all the pent up anger and rage at them making a sudden reappearance she hadn't been prepared for that time, but refused to let it linger as she really wanted to hear this.

"That's not nearly powerful enough," Remus sighed, giving Harry a rather sorry look he had to rebuke him for that. "You'll need something with much more feeling, all consuming, to produce even a faded patronus."

Harry frowned, already trying to cast his mind around for something even better for his next attempt, ignoring the buildup of tension that was beginning to happen when he realized his first attempt might not work, and what he would soon hear because of it.

"Oh, yeah, multitasking," Sirius smirked over at him, successfully distracting both Harry and James and causing them to give halfhearted glares.

"Can't expect you to get it perfect on the first try," Remus grinned encouragingly at him.

"And that's about as far as most of our class got in our seventh year," Sirius laughed.

"While some of us had mastered the spell years ago and showed off a bit," James snickered.

Lily sighed with a roll of her eyes, remembering that memorable class as she'd actually been able to produce her patronus near the end of the lesson, and the near constant teasing from her classmates that her's and James had ended up being a matching pair.

Remus however was scowling all over again, looking ready to snap at his friends to shut up so that he could move past this. Harry couldn't help but wonder why the subject bothered him so much, but again didn't get a chance to ask before he kept going.

"Now's not the time to be distracted," James gently chided with a light smirk in place.

"Wasn't that a bit early?" Lily couldn't help but worry, "he'd only done the barest of it once."

"How could he practice and know it was good enough without testing it?" Remus said right back. "So he produced a vapor, that's good in theory, but if it was going to be helpful he had to try it. He could have sat around for hours working on that one memory and never realized it wasn't useful enough until it was too late."

Lily backed down with a resigned look.

Lily couldn't help but make a horrid choking noise, suddenly realizing how Harry might linger on this, and why he would being as this was the first time he'd heard her voice, and oh Merlin if he actually wanted to linger on this…

"Oh," Lily whimpered, and Harry couldn't help but lean into himself, feeling rather ashamed this wanting of hearing an old echo was causing his family so much pain.

"It's alright Harry," Sirius tried his best to smile over at Harry, who had wrapped his arms around his mother and muttered sorry for her benefit, but now the pair turned back to him curiously as he insisted, "it's sort of like looking in that old mirror. Depressing as all get out, sure, but we can hardly sit around and blame you for wanting this."

James was twitching fiercely, still looking like he was going to be ill but for more reasons than the others suspected. No he did not want to sit around and hear his wife's final moments over again, but like Sirius he could hardly get mad at Harry for wanting it. No, what he was truly afraid of was that if Harry continued to experience this, continued to want it, well then maybe Harry wouldn't even be bothered to fight off the dementors. That could lead to some very horrible possibilities that he had no desire to think on long.

Sirius was taking it in stride that it was his turn to comfort his friend now, and delighted in giving him a sharp poke and reminding him, "I'll say the same thing to you. Don't linger on something you can't fix, Remus is there, I'm sure everything will be fine."

"What's got you in such a good mood?" Remus grumbled at him, noting James did look slightly better as he rolled his eyes but at least seemed distracted from whatever he'd been thinking, and Harry and Lily did look marginally better as well.

"Who says I'm in any kind of good mood?" He demanded right back in a hushed whisper, and Remus did note that his hands seemed to be shaking and he did look almost as pale as Remus himself at this prolonged topic, so he decided to press on and hope Harry would get a hold of this spell soon.

Harry shuddered in remembered disgust, not at all appreciating this boggart dementor could cause the same effects as a real dementor even on something as little as the lights.

Remus was frowning and jittering in place, knowing the spell should have worked the first time, his repeated incantations obviously weren't helping, which meant he'd been right and Harry hadn't picked a powerful enough memory, which meant he was fixing to have to read something he'd rather gouge out his eyes then do.

Remus couldn't help but choke and hesitate for a moment, but if Sirius could force this out he'd be damned if he couldn't as well so read as swiftly as possible.

Lily in no way felt any better about hearing this then any of her boys, but upon the second time hearing this, the shock had worn off some and she couldn't help but wonder, why was she getting the chance to plead at all? Voldemort had never once been known for sparing his victims, and why her the mudblood? Perhaps he'd taken a moment to gloat? She'd recognized back in the first book that her sacrifice had saved her son's life, but she was still craving for details of exactly how and why. It was all she could come up with on the spot, and she most certainly was not going to bring it up to the others as they all looked likely to cry any moment now.

Lily couldn't help but release a surprised giggle she in no way really felt, but it was better than letting her breath continue to hitch as she forced herself not to cry. Without any prompting she murmured to Harry "no need to apologize love, you've done nothing wrong."

Harry just shrugged, knowing his first instinct was always to apologize if he hadn't done something right the first time, and also that old shame reappearing of passing out, especially in front of a teacher he respected so much.

"You see," James forced the ghost of his old smile, "you should learn now you probably won't ever have a real reason to apologize to Moony. He understands."

"Can't imagine why," Sirius shuddered, wishing he could be in the room as well to comfort these two then as he was trying to now.

"I'll have Dumbledore fired." James scowled heavily at the thought of this happening again. "Someone should take some bleeding precautions to make sure this doesn't bloody happen again."

Harry couldn't tell if his Dad was kidding about getting the headmaster fired for this, but he looked so furious in that moment he decided against asking.

"Whatever motive helps you to get past this," Lily sighed in relief, thinking she'd never knock another Quidditch game again if that's what took Harry to get past this awful memory.

"I can't believe his happy memories are even depressing me at this point," James muttered for Sirius alone. Sirius nodded in understanding, knowing full well why James would be so upset about this. Not to say these shouldn't be happy memories, but the boy really didn't have anything outside of school things to be happy for? Nothing involving Ron and Hermione even? The ache of not having been present in his life to make any kind of appearance now hadn't been there for a while, which made it all the sharper the longer they thought on this.

Remus was already wincing, having already guessed Harry's new memory was hardly better than the old one, and none too pleased about being proven wrong.

Then Remus shuddered so hard the book knocked against his knee a few times, not that he really noticed. Of course, he should have realized at this rate of progression, if Harry had heard Lily of course he'd hear James to, and it was just his luck he'd get to read about both of them back to back, and no he wasn't fixing to vomit or cry… he had to shake his head around a few times to clear his vision and focused back to find James gritting his teeth so hard he was likely to break his jaw.

Sirius leaned his weight into him again, muttering, "you did all you could, I've no doubt you gave Voldemort the fight of his life, you can't blame yourself for this anymore than us."

James sucked in a soulless breath, but Remus decided it was high time he keep going before he allowed anyone to continue dwelling on this.

Lily continued her own internal monologue at this point, forcefully shaking off that terrible mental image in favor of thinking on why that wouldn't have worked? James had clearly just died trying to spare her and their son, why hadn't his sacrifice counted for both her and Harry's? What was the real difference there? She despised not knowing the answer, as she'd do anything to make it so that her family would never be harmed by this.

"And thank Merlin for that," Harry groaned, rubbing at his temple and trying very hard to comfort his mother even half as well as she'd been trying to do for him. It wasn't any more pleasant for her to hear James last moments then it was for her to hear her own.

Remus couldn't help muttering under his breath he'd be lucky if he didn't mimic Harry in this future, and only hoped Harry actually admitting this to him would finally prompt himself to tell Harry why this would bother him so much.

"Credit for trying anyway," Lily offered for him, knowing it was pointless and Remus would have seen. Now all she was wondering was if he was going to ignore the instance, or jump on the opportunity to really comfort him.

"Strange indeed," Sirius nodded, still concentrating more on bothering James by occasionally reaching over and poking him when it looked like he was about to join Harry very soon in his own tears, though it seemed more out of frustration than anything now; he seemed to be feeling like he'd failed his family and let them down. Sirius was trying all he could, but there was only so much he could convince his best mate of how stupid that was.

"Oh, I'm sure he's heard my name in passing or something," James grumbled, avoiding everybody's eyes and returning Sirius newest prod with a sharp elbow snap of his own to get him to stop.

"That's all you've got," Lily snapped, green eyes flashing furiously. "Merlin what's gotten into you Remus? Would you two quit it" she finished sharply, causing James and Sirius to freeze in the process of out smacking each other.

"He started it," James said at once.

"What are you, five?" Sirius demanded with a roll of his eyes. They were both trying their very hardest not to throw accusing looks at Remus all over again, still unable to process one bit how he could simply gloss over this as if they really had just been passing kids.

James thought of all three of his friends like brothers, he'd always known they'd felt the same, but now he was beginning to wonder if that feeling hadn't faded out of Remus with time? Remus was rather busy with the Order, nearly constantly going on missions for Voldemort to keep an eye on the opposing side's werewolves as well as a few other lone missions. Was it possible his time dead had made him forget? Did he really no longer care for Harry the way he did now? He knew people changed, but he never would have seen this coming… unless there was something else going on? His mind floundered though, trying to come up with anything that would satisfactorily explain this mess.

If Harry had spoken right then, maybe they could have worked it out, but he didn't. Harry kept his feeling bottled up like usual, trying his very hardest to both understand and ignore all at once why he felt like he might know what was keeping Remus so hesitant right then. Something personal he was sure, something about the memory of James that really stung…

Remus was looking dejected and angrier in himself in that moment than he had in almost all his life, and when no one spoke up again to even offer a word this time he read on with a lot more venom than intended.

"Well I'm glad someone did," Lily sniffed, noting no one else like McGonagall or Dumbledore seemed to be going out of their way to make sure Harry was alright after that first instance.

"I'll actually back you up on that one," Sirius nodded with forced cheerfulness, remembering quite well how smug he'd been upon the realization he finally had an excuse to get out of his parents' house, a house he was already growing to question even before he'd started school and learned what a real family could be like.

Lily still couldn't help the little miserable sigh that came out of her upon the reminder that leaving his home was considered a happy memory at all, but the fact that her and James were so clearly not in the picture, that anyone decent before Hagrid wasn't there for him, made that combination of anger and depression come back again full force.

'Well I'm beginning to question my own better judgment' Remus snarled against himself, more than sick of his future actions, or lack thereof in this case.

"Brilliant," James suddenly beamed, blinking in surprise at what he found an exceptionally powerful bit of magic being shown right then.

"Harry's doing it," Sirius now yelped, egging Remus on to see how long his little pup could pull this off, whether he could somehow possibly increase the power behind that and actually create a corporal patronus.

"It didn't say what the silver shadow was," Lily noted, trying to brush past the fact that this was draining so much out of her son and Remus really should step in soon.

"It said 'huge' must be something big," James offered curiously.

"Maybe he'd turn into an elephant, or a bear, or a hippo? That would be interesting," Sirius offered with a smirk.

"You just listed three of the most random animals you could," Harry noted with amusement, still brushing past the annoyance he couldn't remember himself.

"Thank you," Lily sighed in relief.

"How come you were doing that with just the fog instead of the full patronus?" Harry asked curiously, now wondering if Remus' patronus wasn't the cause for his surly attitude for this particular bit. Hadn't his mum said it would be a wolf? Was this what was bothering him so much, that an animal meant to represent your spirit was one he hated so much?

"I didn't want to chase it off like a Patronus would have done," Remus said absently, "just wanted to ward it off long enough to put it back." Then he kept reading quickly before Harry got a chance to ask further.

"It really was dear, don't be so hard on yourself," Lily agreed when she saw how frustrated he still looked.

"Look at it this way," James offered, casting his mind around for Harry to see this the proper way, "at least if you're able to produce this already, you'll be able to keep them off you long enough to hit the ground and call time out, and that's just after the third try! I'm positive by the next match it won't even be draining you as much."

Harry considered this for a moment before nodding in acceptance. He still somehow knew he could do better than this, somehow felt he was capable of producing the full Patronus, but for now he'd accept the shorter option for the sake of his game.

Despite how annoyed Sirius still felt by Remus, it didn't stifle his giggling one bit at that mental sentence. Nor did it really dull just how grateful he was that Remus was doing this at all, he'd take Harry getting defense against dementors with a touch of annoyance at Remus any day.

Remus was already frowning, mentally preparing himself for how this could go but didn't give anyone a chance to ask Harry before reading.

Sirius went 'eh' and waved his hand in a vague gesture with a roll of his eyes while Remus grumbled, "Wish I didn't some days."

"Well this ought to be fun," James snapped with a touch more sarcasm than normal, guessing this wouldn't go any better than when his name had come up.

"Dumb luck and an inherited sneakiness," Lily grinned indulgently.

"Thought you were going to be found out about hiding my arse huh?" Sirius snickered.

"I wouldn't have any idea what Harry really knew about it," Remus shrugged, "so I can imagine I was being a bit cautious."

"At least you were vaguely more subtle then dropping something this time," James agreed with an idiotic grin in place.

"Ouch," Sirius winced as if Remus had smacked him again, "make sure you don't try and drop a hint of what you really think or anything."

Remus had his head cocked to the side curiously, still more blasted than anything why he and Sirius weren't trying to talk to Harry and tell him what surely must really be going on. Aside from Harry, why else would Sirius be hanging around here? It had been more than enough time that he really was beginning to wonder if something else wasn't floating around that the pair of them were trying to figure out, and clearly wanting to leave Harry out of.

"Yeah, I wouldn't want to share with Ron either," James muttered, like the others still distracted by that small little exchange.

"Probably doesn't like being asked about it because he's such a terrible actor," Sirius snickered.

"Now that's not fair," James disagreed at once, mischief sparkling in his eyes as he appraised him, "Remus always came up with the best lies on the spot."

"He just couldn't say it without acting like a shifty little nit," Lily agreed fondly.

Remus made sure all of them could see how unamused he was by their light picking before reading on loudly.

"Oh come on, go back to talking about me now," Sirius scowled, deciding he'd spend a whole book about his life in Azkaban rather than consistently hear about this!

James didn't really agree with him, but he hardly looked any happier about Harry's current train of thought.

Lily made a horrible choking noise somewhere between wanting to vomit and a sob, hardly able to comprehend what that must feel like, knowing she didn't want that for her son but unable to even begin to say it was wrong for him to want it.

Harry tried to give them as much comfort as he could by offering, "that's not true anymore. Please guys, I'm sure I don't dwell on this for long, and now I've got all the time in the world to hear you guys talk."

This was hardly the cure for the situation at hand, but it was a brief reminder that this future just had to be changed, they wouldn't allow anything else to be possible.

"And there's that," James frowned, but didn't say it loud enough for anyone to have heard him.

"There you go, focus on your goals," Sirius encouraged, anything to keep away from that vat of depression.

"Dang," the boys muttered, knowing they would have been much happier playing Ravenclaw than Slytherin for the simple fact it would have been more sporting. There was already so much bad blood between Gryffindor and Slytherin they didn't really need the Championship to fall between them.

"Five?" Lily scowled, "Merlin, he's a seventh year, doesn't he have his own homework!"

"I feel like, so long as he wins the Cup, he doesn't really care about his NEWT's," James shrugged, "my best bet for this kid, he's probably looking for a career in the World's."

Lily still couldn't help but frown, thinking he should have some other career to fall back on rather than banking on a sport, but as she wasn't his mother she really couldn't say anything else.

Remus couldn't help but wince a bit, wondering if he was taking too much out of Harry, but upon reflection he admitted he really couldn't do much else. Harry needed those lessons no matter how much they took out of him, and it's not as if he could lower them any.

Sirius nodded in agreement, though he looked more in pity than smugness as he commented "surprised it took her this long to crack honestly."

"And I thought she was a bit of a workaholic before," James frowned in sympathy, wondering how much this girl could really be sleeping with all of that.

"So many jokes to make about that, I don't know where to start," Sirius smirked, picturing all sorts of pleasant poisons he wouldn't have a problem getting his hands on.

"Wait, what?" Lily demanded, her eyes going wide in disbelief. "He can't mean that, it's not possible."

"What did you think her schedule was implying for her to do?" Harry demanded in exasperation, rubbing at his own temple in frustration as the answer yet again slipped through.

"That, I don't know, that she was somehow keeping up with all of those classes through notes and special permission, but this is unfounded. There's no way she could actually be attending those classes, at the same time."

"Time," Sirius muttered under his breath, "what on earth was it, time watch, time-"

"What are the odds Hermione will just decide to tell them when you ask?" James groaned, more than sick of all of these mysteries surrounding his son's life. One peaceful, uneventful, quiet year; was that too much to ask for?

"Since they've yet to make up for that fight about the broom, slim to none," Remus muttered, turning back to the book without hope. None of them seemed to notice Sirius was quietly muttering to himself, trying to sift through a half drunken memory.

Lily sat there for a few moments more, running her hand through her hair in frustration she couldn't figure this out before turning back into the story.

"Pity that, since they're so dang useless," Harry grumbled.

"Harry clearly didn't inherit my nosiness then," James grinned, "I'd have never let this slide without getting an answer."

"Don't I know it," Remus grumbled.

"What, five practices a week isn't enough, he's got to come to you to strategy talk while you're doing your homework," Lily muttered.

"Ge, wonder where she got that opinion of," Sirius scowled, hoping with everything he had Wood was just joking when he'd made that comment.

Lily couldn't tell from Remus' tone whether Wood really had been kidding, she sure hoped that was sarcasm because otherwise she'd have as much to say to Wood as she'd like to Malfoy.

"Oh, I'm sure she won't keep it that long," James frowned, "McGonagall really does care about the game and Harry's chances of winning."

"She just happens to care about Harry that little bit more to make sure he's going to be safe," Lily added on with a touch of venom that made all of them edge away from her in fear.

"Don't bias your opinion about the broom Harry," Sirius chided lightly, "just because that brat has one doesn't make the model crappy."

"If you really had to," James added without really meaning it, "you could always just order another Nimbus Two Thousand if it bothers you that much, but since it won't be necessary it's a moot point."

James and Sirius were both frowning and getting jittery again as they realized the next game would be coming up, and what exactly that game would mean to them. They had yet to go one single match without having near heart failure, and it would be an unjust world if the same happened in the next. Surely one of them would get a good sound Quidditch game.

"Oh I'm sure she just loved that," Lily scowled, giving her son a very obvious look about how rude she felt that was. Harry looked properly abashed for this, but didn't look any less eager to hear the news.

"Ooh, getting snippy I see," Sirius couldn't help but smile, remembering how they'd used to place bets on how hard it was to really test her nerves.

"Well Harry's clearly learned how to push at least one of her buttons," James grinned.

"I'm sure you know the rest of them and have them all perfectly labeled," Lily huffed, not at all pleased how amused her husband was by this.

"What, why!" Their vague amusement had switched right back to concern, not at all pleased if it turns out Harry's strength behind that spell was only weakening with time.

Which caused them all to release a breath of relief, Remus quickly turning to assure Harry, "that's as much progress as you really can hope for in such a time Harry. You are dealing with a seventh-year spell after all. Plus, if you're trying to use that same memory over and over again, you won't be getting a different result."

Harry nodded in understanding, still frustrated but accepting he may be asking too much of himself in this case. Perhaps this feeling was wrong, and he didn't master this spell like he'd first thought.

"You cannot hope to control that," James sighed, trying to keep as much misery out of his voice as possible as he consoled, "all you can do is try to focus on something else."

Harry nodded in understanding, still wishing more than anything else he'd never had this experience to begin with, that his father giving him advice now wasn't so treasured because it should have been commonplace.

"At least Remus will set him right," Sirius nodded sternly.

"And there's the silver lining I was looking for," Lily beamed, smoothing Harry's hair flat for a second.

"And that's all you we're asking for walking in," James reminded.

Harry bit at his lip, still wanting to argue and say he could do more than this, but still agreed all the same he'd take would he could get.

"Uh-oh," Sirius said at once in a sing-song voice.

"Let's see if Harry's any better at playing this off then Remus himself would be," James agreed brightly. Since the only thing Remus would bring Harry would be this one nonalcoholic drink that he had tried, there really was no doubt in their mind. In fact they felt a warmth sweeping through themselves as if they'd just had their own mug of Butterbeer at the obvious thought Remus had tried to put into this simple action. Even sharing a drink with Harry like this was putting more effort into spending time with him then he'd really yet shown outside of these lessons where he seemed to still be going out of his way to avoid personal talk.

"Obviously not," Lily giggled at Harry's slip up.

"Not impossible," Sirius snickered.

"But if it's anything like the face you've made before while lying," James smirked, "I'm betting Remus would have seen through that."

"So what?" James grin only got wider, "S'not like he's going to do anything about it."

"He'd be a right hypocrite if he did," Sirius agreed, patting Remus' shoulder to make sure he completely understood what he meant.

Remus rolled his eyes at the pair of them, but couldn't help but muster up a grin as he was very sure they were right and he'd probably laugh if he really found out how Harry had gotten a hold of this drink.

"Oh no, not at all," Sirius cackled.

"Merlin Harry, you've got some rotten timing," James sighed since that had managed to dry up Sirius humor at once.

"Sorry," Harry said instantly, looking beseechingly at his godfather as he obviously realized he'd just asked a question no one was going to like the answer to.

"Don't apologize," Sirius said at once, rubbing his hands against his knees and more than happy for the distraction of talking to Harry rather than think about the answer he knew Remus was about to give. "Unless you're really telling me that at thirteen you somehow knew this was going to happen." He finished waving his arm around vacantly.

Harry laughed lightly for a moment at how absurd it sounded, relieving a bit of tension.

"Thoughtfully eh?" Lily grumbled, shivering in disgust and almost hoping Remus would skive on the details of this answer.

"Understatement," James mumbled, keeping a protective eye on Sirius as he continued losing color at this topic. He was clearly picturing himself surrounded on all sides again by these monsters.

"You sure seem to be taking this lightly," Lily scowled at him.

"I'm positive I find it just as funny then as I do now," Remus rebuked, using the same deadpan tone to make sure she understood how awful he really felt about this.

Harry couldn't help but startle a bit, leaning back into his seat and turning slightly green at this.

"Please Remus, butter that up a bit more, I don't think you quite hit impending doom just right," Sirius scowled outright now.

Remus couldn't help but chuckle at his friend showing such a sense of humor now when he was very clearly disturbed the most by this whole thing.

Remus hadn't been able to choke out his whole name before he jolted like he'd just been electrocuted and the book flew across the room.

"They what!" Lily screeched, getting to her feet and going as red as her hair. "They, why! That sentence hasn't been used on the worst of the Death Eaters, what in Merlin's beard made anyone think it was okay for this to happen!"

James looked on lockdown, blinking spastically as if he was hearing the news about Sirius' crime all over again and finding it just as disturbing now as he did then. Sirius was the last person on earth who deserved that fate, what on earth was going on that someone had approved of this.

Sirius was actually wavering a bit, for a moment he truly looked like he was about to pass out right there. Remus wanted to, he really did, to reach over and grasp his shoulder, make sure he understood that they would die before letting that happen to him...but he was a little lost in his own mind this time; because what was disturbing him more than anything was the absolute careless way he seemed to mention that to Harry!

Of course he wasn't there right now, Harry may not be seeing it for how he was feeling now, like a five-ton weight was crashing his innards at the mere mention of this let alone the thought happening. Still, Harry should have noted how hard that should have been for him to say, to go pale and lose color, even shift around slightly or possibly drop his butterbeer, anything to indicate what he'd just said should show some bloody discomfort to himself! What in the name of Merlin could have happened that of all the reactions in the world, he'd define that one as almost careless in regards to one of his closest friend, someone he'd regard as a brother. Surely...surely he may have just been acting. He'd have to play it off like this to make sure no one suspected him of helping Sirius. There just wasn't any other explanation, not a one that didn't end in him really believing Sirius deserved this, but that would mean Sirius had really done all of this…

"James, I think he's really gone into shock or something."

"Merlin, you know it's bad when he freaked out more than I did-"

"Sirius don't do that-"

To late Remus had phased back into the conversation and Sirius was already giving him a very hard poke in between his ribs which did have the desired effect of having him jerk and rub at the spot and have reality slam back into his brain with a harsh slap in the face.

"What's gotten into you?" James demanded, pushing Sirius out of the way and giving them both stern looks, and making them both unsure who he was demanding that of until he turned to face Remus with his arms crossed to continue. "Remus I am positive it doesn't happen, just like I was telling Sirius. Harry would have reacted much worse than the pair of you."

Harry was nodding eagerly over his father's shoulder, bouncing on his heels and watching him just as carefully, looking like he was personally blaming himself for whatever reaction this had caused.

"I-" he stuttered, giving his head one more shake to clear away any and all poisonous thoughts, "yeah, you're right, of course. Just, just caught off guard is all." He tried to prove he meant it by taking to his feet and going to fetch the book, but couldn't deny he did a rather crappy job of it as he couldn't quite meet anyone's eyes. The words kept echoing in his head over and over again, 'the fate that awaits Sirius...' but no James and Harry were both right, nothing was going to happen, and Harry was surely just not watching him well enough, still distracted by the information he'd been given. That must be it!

The others had settled down enough again and were returning to their seats, and Remus made quick work of finding his place again and reading on very loudly to distract himself more than anything.

Lily still mumbled a few foul things under her breath about what she thought of this but Remus clearly wasn't going to stop for that.

"I'm sorry," Harry said instantly, looking close to tears because those words had ever passed his lips. "I'm so sorry Sirius, I-"

Sirius waved him off, effectively pretending he hadn't just thrown up a little in his mouth and he wasn't blinking back tears of his own that Harry had ever thought this of him in any way, shape or form.

Remus did take a small moment to look pitifully at the pair of them before trying to read on without a wobble in his voice.

'I'd like to think I was more offended, or heartbroken, or anything!' His mind screamed at him, begging Harry to pick up some detail that Remus had been any kind of distressed at this conversation, but Harry was still busy watching Sirius and he could never explain himself if he asked for that kind of thing now.

"Subtle Harry, nice and subtle" Lily murmured, wrapping her arm around his shoulders for a moment to comfort them both since Harry was still twitching in agitation that he was the cause for so many of the depressing feelings circling through the room.

"I'd take that bet," James offered with forced amusement, still trying to watch both Sirius and Remus at the same time since both of them still looked so out of it and at any given time might faint or bolt from all of this pent up stress.

"Oh joy, a whole new wondrous thing to broad on!" Sirius hissed, shifting his weight around and dearly wishing he had the baby in his lap, or anything to help take his attention off this hell storm.

"Well she must not have been paying attention to where she was going either, otherwise she wouldn't have run into you," Lily pointed out in a vain attempt to find some humor again.

Remus blinked spastically for a few seconds, rereading that bit again for good measure and then joining his friends in a whoop of joy. It may have seemed petty and a bit shallow, but after the horrid news they'd just experienced any type of good thing to look on would be celebrated for as long as possible. So all five of them spent a rousing time laughing and commending Harry on getting his broom back, more than amused and waiting for the moment where McGonagall exclaimed she'd been wrong and of course nothing was wrong with a broom like that! By the time Remus was ready to move on their spirits had lifted so much they were almost genuinely smiling for what felt like the first time in ages.

"But of course," James scoffed, "she'd never do a thing to harm that broom."

"As Sirius as I am," Sirius beamed, bouncing around in sheer pleasure.

They were in such a good mood that James and Remus didn't even physically scold him for that but instead just groaned miserably at what they felt was an overused joke.

"She means it I'm sure, McGonagall wouldn't joke about that," Lily said quickly before Sirius could make the same joke in a row.

"I'm sure that had absolutely nothing to do with you getting this back the next day, nothing at all," Sirius released a bark like laugh at the end at the thought of that exchange.

"Suppose he's been running around the castle like a crazy person looking for you," Remus snickered.

"Merlin, Harry hasn't even gotten his first go on it, give him a chance," James chuckled.

"Harry!" Lily snapped, some of her amusement beginning to ebb away. "You should have apologized to her ages ago, not the moment you get the broom back. If you knew all along she was just trying to help, why were you being so rude to her for so long?"

Harry opened then closed his mouth, turning away sheepishly and only murmuring a few halfhearted replies. Truthfully this fight felt as shallow as his mother made it out to be in hindsight, even before he'd gotten his broom back he'd felt guilty for his actions and really had been wanting to apologize and just hadn't been able to think of a way to phrase it, not as used to it as Ron about making up in fights or even having them really. He'd chosen to say this now because here he had a ready made reason to go and talk to her again.

He said as much, and some of Lily's anger washed back out of her when she realized how repentant Harry clearly was.

"Forever love his sense of humor," Sirius snickered.

"And how did he work that out?" Sirius yelped in surprise.

"Can't have conned it out of him, Neville doesn't seem the type," Remus said thoughtfully.

"Possibly did a favor for him, some of the portraits will go for that," James offered.

"The poor thing," Lily sighed in sympathy, wishing Neville would catch a break every now and then.

"It's no wonder he wrote these things down," Remus rolled his eyes, "I'd forget half of these."

"Not surprised one bit," James couldn't help but beam, puffing his chest out slightly with undiluted pride his son was getting this well-deserved attention for a change.

"From the best Godfather ever," Sirius said just a tad pompously, which only increased when no one bothered to correct him, though Lily made sure he could see her eye roll for the comment.

"Sadly not," James was quaking at the thought, "but you won't be able to get him off of it soon."

"Well they're an enthusiastic lot," Lily giggled at all of the admirers her son seemed to suddenly have.

"Are you sure," Remus quirked a brow in amusement, "are you absolutely positive? Because I'm not convinced that's what that crowd was going on about."

Harry gave him a cheeky little smirk right back, more than pleased that whatever funk Remus had been in during this chapter he was clearly trying very hard to stay out of it.

"Now was that really necessary?" Lily chided.

"Had to make sure he got his point across," Sirius rolled his eyes indulgently at what he was sure was a common exchange between those two at this point.

"I'll take the trade any day," James nodded in fervent agreement.

Lily was torn for a moment between sighing in exasperation and giggling her head off as all four boys nodded in complete understanding of these actions. Eventually she ended on chuckling and shaking her head at the lot of them.

"I get the feeling she's not trying to outdo herself and do double the length that's required anymore," Remus noted lightly.

Lily blinked in surprise for a moment at what she considered such an odd and obvious topic but then she looked over at Sirius who was nodding and explaining, "I'll tell you more about it later, but it really is one of the main ways they've survived without magic in their life."

James was nodding with a very curious look in place but didn't pester more of an answer out of him.

James let out a low and throaty whistle, Hermione really must look bad for that kind of comparison to be taking place.

"Oh no, the thought of having a life again is too much for her," Sirius mocked lightly with a rather concerned frown still in place.

"It's not so bad," Lily disagreed at the same time James was nodding vigorously and saying, "yeah, she should drop that one." The couple took a small moment to exchange amused looks for disagreeing over something else again.

"That was, ominous," Sirius frowned in concern, already trying to lean over Remus and find out why.

Remus budged him out of the way at once, fighting back the temptation to chuck the book back across the room again. They were in such a good mood now, surely nothing too awful was about to happen.

"A-a bed-" James began stuttering more in shock and confusion, but Remus was still reading in a fevered haste to find out what could possibly cause that kind of reaction.

"Oh bollocks," Sirius muttered, now leaning as far away from the book as possible, his face twisting into quite the look of fear at what this could mean.

"Oh, oh now, he, he didn't," Lily whimpered, shaking her head furiously at what this could imply.

Remus was looking down at the book, dumbstruck for a moment longer before reading out what felt like a harsh blow to his gut.

"Why do I have a really, really bad idea," James hissed, drumming his hands furiously on his knees to help alleviate what he could already sense was coming.

"Crap." The room muttered as one.

"Oh, poor Ron," Lily whispered, shaking her head miserably.

"I really can't believe no one ever tried to do more to stop this from happening," Remus sighed, placing the book gingerly down in front of him in agitation.

Harry was frowning right along with the rest of them, but for a completely different reason. Something about this felt, wrong. Almost off he supposed, because that wasn't right. He tried for a few moments to understand why he would think this, it seemed perfectly obvious this is what had happened, but then he received a sharp spike for his trouble and made no protest as his Mum made to go and pick up the book.


	13. GRYFFINDOR VS RAVENCLAW

"I really think we should go to bed after this chapter," Lily voted, glancing at the clock for a moment and taking a worried glance over at Remus, who was rubbing furiously at his eyes; and not for the fate of Scabbers she knew.

"It's a bit early," Harry disagreed, clearly not noticing the same thing but still eyeing the book with undisguised hope. She could tell something was bothering him, but the fact that he hadn't voiced it out loud meant whatever it was he knew he couldn't fully discuss without having a headache. She didn't press him for it, but instead said, "well, it would do us all some good to turn in for the night, we've had a rather long day I think." Knowing it would come up again at the end anyways, she went on and started her chapter without anymore protest.

They all winced in horror at what this could really mean. If Ron and Hermione really never did makeup for this then that would mean that Harry would have to choose one of his friends in the end, a fate no one was hoping for. Harry was so distracted by this that it finally clouded over his annoying little insistence Scabbers wasn't dead at all and gave him something new to focus on.

"Can't rightly blame Ron," Sirius frowned, "but I really hope he cares more about Hermione's accident then Scabbers fate."

"You saying if I'd let my owl eat yours you'd forgive me?" James couldn't help but tease.

Sirius pretended to deliberate for a moment before asking, "did he try to attack mine several times before he'd done it?"

"Yes," James agreed at once.

"Then absolutely not!" Sirius cried in mock outrage, turning away and crossing his arms as dramatically as he possibly could.

"You two put on a good show," Remus snickered, "but I'm afraid the two who needed that lesson aren't here. Good try though."

"Which she really should have back when she bought him," Lily sighed loudly before Sirius could say anything.

"Really Hermione?" James groaned. "She can't really believe that! You don't think Ron tried that before he came tearing down the stairs?"

"Yeah, I'm sure Ron just cuddles with those in his bed, never would have made sure to get rid of them," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Well yeah," Harry scoffed, though his own distill at how daft Hermione was being was minimal to how upset he really felt at his two friends possibly losing their friendship.

"Urho," Sirius winced, already knowing Hermione's attitude was likely to spike.

That left all five of them shrinking into themselves a little, realizing they may have been picking on Hermione a little too much this year on top of everything else she's been dealing with.

"Saw that coming," Lily sighed in pity, knowing quite well how much someone could care for their pet.

"Ron was just doing that to complain, I highly doubt he meant it," Sirius winced, the twins clearly weren't doing a very good job of cheering their brother up this time.

"Merlin, none of the Weasley's really know what comforting someone means do they?" Lily sighed.

"I do," James brightened at once with a wide grin.

"The rats proudest moment to date," Remus agreed fondly.

Sirius couldn't help but snicker, feeling like now the twins were on the right track to making Ron feel better.

"And that just killed it," Sirius huffed.

"If that doesn't cheer him up nothing will," James perked up at once.

"Wonder if Ron's going to try out for the team next year?" Sirius grinned, remembering how Wood was going to be gone at the end of the year which would leave a place open for a bodily enthusiastic player.

"But of course," Remus nodded in complete understanding, "she's as much a nut as any of us."

"Something I've noticed," James agreed with a roll of his eyes, a few things coming to mind he'd like to try and improve upon that.

"Really?" Sirius asked in surprise. "Guess that must have stopped not too long from now."

"Better cling to them while you can then," Remus frowned.

"Oh, but she was enjoying herself," Lily giggled, finding this just as mundane then if James had gone on like this, but at least it was keeping their mind on more pleasant things.

Harry felt a funny sort of swooping feeling in his gut, quite apart from the little tick of his memory being replaced with yet another name he was sure he felt some kind of connection to. The feeling was so foreign though that he didn't think long on it.

"The horror," Lily scowled, her annoyance at Wood still managing to grow the longer this carried on.

"What an enjoyable pep talk," James rolled his eyes.

All four boys sighed, more pleased than they could ever put into words that such a broom could exist, and also silently agreeing Lily was hardly putting the right amount of enthusiasm into describing this momentous event.

"Mom," Harry half groaned half laughed, "nothing happened, I didn't fall off. Quite sounding like you're reading about me riding on a dragon."

Lily gave him a maternal glare, like 'I'll worry as much as I want to young man' but she did marginally relax, which is why she may not have noticed Harry's odd little frown, trying to understand why he'd used that particular comparison.

James was bouncing around in unrestrained glee, unable to put into words how happy this was making him. His son finally being able to properly enjoy flying around on the best broom like he should have been able to do all the way back during his first year.

"That's it," Sirius declared, "Lily needs to give up the book now, there is no way you should be able to read in such a bland tone of voice about something so momentous."

"I'm proud Harry's doing so well," Lily rebuked, "but I'm not going to feel any better about this until he actually manages to get through one bleeding game without something awful happening."

Sirius huffed and grumbled she was missing the point while Lily decided to ignore him.

"He's certainly in more control of it," Remus nodded encouragingly when he saw Harry look hesitant at the question.

"You'll do fine," James soothed at once. "I am positive that shouldn't happen again, but if it does you are more than prepared for it this time."

"And there's that," Sirius nodded in agreement, his ill feelings towards the headmaster not lingering too much on this subject, he liked to think he still had faith in the man to do this simple task.

"Oh she's doing a great job at guard duty," Lily scowled in annoyance.

"You're in a bad mood," James noted lightly, "you do know there's nothing for Harry to be guarded from."

"I know," Lily snapped, "I just don't appreciate her taking her job so lightly."

"Perfectly understandable," Sirius nodded.

"Well she's quite the killjoy," Remus smirked, noting Lily only looked marginally happier at this.

Sirius couldn't help but startle happily, suddenly wishing Ron wasn't there, suddenly hoping against hope he might finally be getting his chance to really talk to Harry.

"Damn," Sirius scowled, his anger possibly a little more than was necessary at his want being dashed because of that cat, his actions in eating Scabbers not exactly one hundred percent forgiven even if it was in his nature.

"Least he was smart enough to do that," Remus sighed, knowing it would only make problems worse if Ron really had hurt Hermione's cat.

"If only," James grumbled, knowing he'd have much rather that been another Sirius sighting then a rekindling of annoyance.

Sirius' bad temper only increased when he realized yet again he was getting skipped off of a Quidditch chapter.

James was willing to let it go that he hadn't gotten this chapter just to hear about this one small moment of pleasure.

Lily couldn't help making a little 'tsk' of annoyance at these boys fawning over a broom like this, admittedly projecting a lot of her bad feelings of Harry and Ron continuing to treat Hermione the way they were on anything associated with the game.

"Well if she does, then Percy's dating a girl far more interesting than he is," Sirius snorted.

"You're an idiot," Remus told him pleasantly.

James couldn't help snickering a bit at that, having no doubts in his mind his son would win and that wouldn't be a problem.

"Far better than you could," Sirius sneered.

"Sadly I wouldn't be all that surprised if Malfoy actually came to school next year with a Firebolt as well," James frowned.

"And that joke is still not funny," Remus rolled his eyes in contempt.

Which caused all four of them to release a gale of laughter for that comment. Lily couldn't deny hers one bit, as even if she is agitated at her son for the way he was acting, she'd be a right hypocrite for not admiring his mouth right then as often as she shot back at anyone who annoyed her.

"Damned right it's real," Sirius puffed out his chest in pleasure.

"Lily I don't think you truly understand how lucky you are," James huffed, a touch of envy gleaming in his eyes at his wife getting this match.

Lily was still studiously ignoring them all.

"Something you really should do more often," Remus nodded in approval.

"Still blows my mind they don't do that at all," Sirius chuckled.

Lily eyed them for a moment before explaining, "I'm actually quite happy Harry's never had to do this but once before. Remember that the schools not living in the same era as we did."

Sirius and Remus exchanged a curious look before nodding in understanding.

"Well I should hope so," James scoffed, "as far as I could tell, he's not got a reason to miss it this time."

Remus grinned as well at what he only hoped was an absurd question, of course he would want to come, or he would now. In this rather bleak future where he hardly seemed able to hold a conversation with Harry, well if Harry didn't catch sight of him it would only chalk up to another heartbreak.

"Wood's pep talks have actually gotten worse over the years," Sirius snickered.

Lily's tone finally changed from mild indulgence, to outright joy and glee at this. That was calm though compared to the boys reactions, who lost it and began laughing at once, despite Harry's berated face and mutters that they could shut up now.

"Sorry Harry," James gasped, rubbing at his ribs and hardly looking sorry at all. "I won't deny I've been dying to find out the first girl that would catch your fancy."

"Epically since one of your friends is a girl," Remus nodded in agreement with a stupid smile still plastered in place.

Harry blinked for a few moments before going even more red and spluttering, "wh-Hermione? No, no way. She's like my sister or something, it's nothing like that."

"Alright," Sirius waved him off, hardly sounding like he meant it as he said, "we get it, just amused us is all."

Still giggling slightly herself Lily decided to keep going while Harry was still more embarrassed than argumentative on the subject.

"I'm positive it is," James muttered in agreement, giving Harry an obvious wink Harry chose to ignore.

"Always worth the listening," Remus nodded happily, easily remembering this boy's previous commentaries.

"I find this very relevant for the match," Sirius snickered.

"I never get tired of that kid," James laughed, knowing he'd be just as bad about endearing this broom if he was commentating.

"Tailing's never a bad idea," Sirius nodded, his eyes narrowing as he continued mentally mapping out the game with every little detail Lily gave.

"And keeping him off guard to boot," Remus praised at the girl's obvious skill.

Lily couldn't deny it anymore, her voice was spiking with just as much excitement as any of the boys as her son continued to show his prowess at yet another swift sighting of such a tiny little object. Yes, she was still ticked at her son for the way he'd been treating his friend, but she could never deny how proud she was of something he was so obviously good at.

"Oooh," all the boys groaned, the couch nearly shaking with them they were all bouncing in place so much.

"S'alright Harry," James said at once when he saw how annoyed his son looked, "you've still got the better broom, you'll still get there in the end."

"Rats," Sirius muttered, snapping his fingers but low enough Lily had no reason to stop.

"For some odd reason, I think McGonagall's a little upset herself," Remus snickered.

"What on earth would give you that idea," James cackled.

"Come on Harry, you can do this," Sirius muttered with absolute faith.

"It's got to be a sign," James grinned wickedly that his son must have just set another record for spotting the snitch again so fast.

"He really is a lovely one," Lily grumbled in just as much agitation as anyone when Harry was once again cut off from his victory.

James didn't hold back his laughter one little bit, going wide-eyed as a child at the mental joys of watching his son soar through the air like this.

"She's lucky she didn't smack into the ground," Remus muttered in admiration of the girls own skills at keeping up with Harry for so long.

"Are you kidding me!" Sirius howled in outrage, nearly getting to his feet and all enjoyment gone in a single moment of frustration. "Dumbledore couldn't bloody-"

Lily wasn't listening, wasn't giving him the chance to go on a full blown rant for two reasons. Mainly, she was too anxious to see the results, to make sure Harry would get to the ground safe and sound again. Also because, she randomly noted Harry had felt them before seeing them every other time, why hadn't he this time? Were the effects finally beginning to wane?

All five of them couldn't help but beam with pride, Harry hadn't been able to produce something so substantial since his first try, and this time he hadn't even felt the side effects of it!

"Yes!" The room cried with such jubilation the parents felt lucky someone had yet again thought to silence their room from the baby's so that it wouldn't wake him. They couldn't help it though, it felt like it had been far too long since they'd really had a chance to just be truly happy about something, and the winning of Harry's game was definitely something worth celebrating. The boys spent quite some time interrogating Harry on every little detail he remembered that the book may not have said. Lily watched on with great enthusiasm and her two cents in whenever she could, but it was also she who demanded they get back on track and finish this chapter. Even Remus, who looked ready to fall asleep before she even finished, looked like he wanted to protest but Lily kept going anyways leaving them to forcefully fall silent.

Lily couldn't help but sound like the proudest mother in the world in that moment, for the first time in her life angry that Hogwarts didn't allow outsiders, like parents, to attend these games.

"So glad that little issue was resolved," Remus' laughter doubled at that random little thing being picked out.

"Can't imagine who would praise you for that," James nearly vibrated in pleasure when he realized Remus had managed to make this game. He wouldn't even be too surprised if Harry managed to catch another shot of a black dog scampering away.

"Shaken?" Lily asked curiously.

"Maybe the dementors freaked him out to?" James offered with a clear shrug saying he really was guessing, mostly because they'd yet to seem to have that effect on him before.

Remus couldn't help but wonder if he wasn't in fact a little shaken up at seeing a ghost in the air after all these years. On a different position yes, but Harry would be nearly indistinguishable from James from that vantage point, he'd probably been having some happier flashbacks to sitting in the stands in his younger years, next to Peter and cheering their friends on.

"What?" Was muttered all across the room, most of them still too excited to really be listening to what Lily was saying exactly.

"He didn't," Lily muttered in disgust.

"He did," James nodded, his face twisting with dislike.

"Not that it really matters," Sirius said with bright-eyed glee, "because whatever stupid thing they thought was going to happen not only blew up in their faces, but I'll lose my damned mind if someone doesn't tell them off for that, like Remus for one."

Remus couldn't help but nod in fervent agreement with this, but couldn't help but wonder if someone else already was by his own rather laid back attitude about it.

"Sweet justice," Sirius crowed, actually getting to his feet and bouncing around with unrestrained glee. Lily was too busy giggling at his antics to tell him off and they spent another long few minutes before Lily finally came back to reality and kept going breathlessly.

James kept muttering things like, "beautiful," and, "perfect, sweet karma," under his breath with a manic grin still in place.

"Perfectly understandable," Remus nodded with glee.

"Oh boy," all of the old Gryffindors lit up with excitement. Even Lily, who never put much attention into Quidditch games, never denied the chance to enjoy one of their parties.

"Well considering how long it's been since Gryffindors really been able to celebrate like this, you can't really blame them for going a little stir crazy," Lily laughed.

"Right out of me own heart," James praised, smacking his lips and suddenly having the childish desire to go back in time and relive his own similar parties.

"Magic," Sirius said in a goofy tone of voice, making Harry laugh all the harder at their antics.

"Are you kidding me," Harry gasped. "How on earth could she- did she even go to the game!"

Lily was frowning all over again, all amusement drained right out of her as she once again was reminded of just how alone the poor dear probably felt right now. She didn't however turn any of those bad feelings towards Harry again, recognizing how truly upset he looked that his friend was so clearly out on her own like this.

James and Sirius couldn't help but be just a little envious they'd never thought up to try that routine.

"Stress," Remus frowned in concern.

"That whole book, by Monday?" Sirius demanded with a raised brow. "I somehow doubt Burbage assigned that."

"Wow, so Hermione is still trying to outdo everyone in the class on top of everything," James said in pity.

"Well I certainly hope so," Lily grumbled.

"Then why is she in the noisy common room?" Remus demanded, wondering if that wasn't perhaps her plan and she was actually trying to get her friends attention.

"Then tell him to get over it," Lily snapped, "she needs to go over there and say it's high time they talk this out right and proper."

"Timing," James scowled, personally thinking he may have even said that as a low blow at Hermione, he didn't think he'd put it past Ron at this point.

All of the boys started, suddenly leaning away from the book as if it were a crying girl too. Lily took the moment to give them all dirty glares for that reaction before continuing with unrestrained pity.

"Damn," the boys cursed, now knowing Harry had no way to go after her and really comfort his friend, Harry was clearly at least trying.

"How much more does he want, she bloody just burst into tears in front of everyone!" Sirius gaped.

"I'm thinking Ron might be holding a bit of a grudge," Remus muttered softly, at least catching Sirius' attention who nodded in understanding.

Harry couldn't help but wonder if there wasn't some kind of backstory to that comment since it also made James look away in a rather guilty way but Lily still wasn't giving them much of a chance to discuss anything.

"Well she's just a right killjoy, least that hasn't changed," James muttered sourly.

"We would be too if Lily wasn't such a killjoy," Sirius snarked.

"Because your dreams have always been so pleasant before," Remus snickered a bit, wondering if this one would be Quidditch related, at least that wouldn't be so bad.

"Now this is a strange dream," Sirius laughed, knowing in any normal circumstances Harry would be riding that any given chance.

"Guess Harry really wants to know what his Patronus is to," James smirked, this being the only thing that made sense to him.

"Hooves?" Lily reread in surprise.

"Think he's chasing after Buckbeak or something?" Sirius wondered, remembering how Harry was supposedly helping with that beast in his free time.

Lily may not have shouted that as loud as the book implied she should have, but it was definitely loud enough to startle the others who had just been so invested in that dream, Harry hardest of all. He had been trying to so hard all day to ignore this sickly feeling that something bad was going to happen on this day, and he'd even gone to bed so surely he must have been wrong this time, this didn't bode well...

Lily felt a cold chill crawling up her spine, wondering who on earth would go slamming the door like that right then.

"Torn?" Remus muttered, wondering if Ron had perhaps damaged them in his nightmare, what else could it be?

Sirius fell back against the couch for all the world looking like he'd just been stabbed himself.

Lily had to blink hard several times to convince her eyes she'd really just read that while ignoring the fevered chill that made her lean in close to Harry on impulse, but she was being stupid of course. Sirius would never really hurt any of those kids, least of all Harry, he'd obviously just brought the knife for defense while he finally figured out how to get in there and...and what? There truly no longer seemed like a logical explanation to explain away a mad man's actions for this nonsense, because no one would really think it a good idea to go into a crowded boy's dormitory in the middle of the night just to talk to Harry. That didn't even begin to explain why he'd rip up the hangings on Ron's curtain...

Remus came out of his shock first, taking a moment to give a glance at Sirius before snapping at Lily, "keep going, I'm sure Ron was just having some sort of nightmare," while rubbing furiously at his chest.

Lily swallowed hard, wondering if Remus really did believe that, but gave no counterargument and only hesitated another second because she wasn't even sure if James and Sirius were still listening, they looked like they'd just closed off from the world. Her only real reassurance was a glance over at her son, who was frowning in utter frustration. That look meant that he was trying to remember something though, there still wasn't a single trace of fear in her boy at this, so there must be something they were all missing.

Remus felt physically torn, wanting to agree with Dean that Ron may have just done that himself, as implausible as that was it was still better than the alternative. Then his mind kept reminding 'heard a door slam shut.'

'The house elf's are slacking' was the first thought that finally reentered Sirius' mind, and that random little tidbit finally put some color back into his skin, though in no way seemed relevant to anything so he pressed his lips together hard to stop himself from interrupting what he kept hoping was just some really elaborate and not funny prank done by the twins.

Then Sirius winced so horribly James and Remus had to wonder if his heart had just skipped one too many beats. This really did sound bad, nearly as bad as the time they'd stopped speaking to him all those years ago, but it wasn't the same thing now! Sirius had just, just... and none of them could still come up with a thing.

"Trust me, I think we all know by this point," Harry muttered to himself.

Remus quickly opened then closed his mouth, unable to break the long drawn out silence with some dumb comment in true Sirius style.

"How would she know so fast?" Harry blurted out a little too loudly, causing all of them to jump since Lily had nearly been reduced to a whisper by this point she was so fearful of what she was reading.

James startled hardest of all, he'd clearly still been in shock, but in an effort to brush it off he exclaimed, "I'm positive there's something so the Head of House knows when someone's in the dormitory who's not supposed to be. At least it would explain those times we snuck in and a Head of House would appear a few seconds after we left."

Lily waited a moment longer, almost praying someone else would have something to say about this that would delay her reading, but no one did and the sticky silence had returned the moment James had gotten done speaking.

Sirius gave a huffy little noise, like he dearly wanted to make some sarcastic comment to that, but his mind was still floundering over a nightmare of a future no one could answer and he just couldn't get the words out.

Remus made an odd sort of noise. He dearly wanted to make the comment that he felt bad for Ron and nobody believing him, but that would mean that he did believe him, and he was still banking on the fact that Ron really did have a nightmare, because otherwise...

Sirius flinched like he'd just been struck. He wanted that to not be answered, would have given all the money in Gringotts for Lily to keep going and say of course that hadn't happened because he really didn't know the password, but already scenarios were running through his mind of all to easy ways he could spy on current Gryffindors to get that password. Surely though, if he was thinking like this now, he couldn't be so mad then that he'd even pull this stunt, right?

This time it was Harry who had to fight back the impulse to mutter 'poor Ron' because he knew deep down that Ron hadn't been having a bad dream and he really wished these people did believe his friend. Of course that didn't help the current mood in the room one bit, who were all practically paralyzed at the endless implications to Sirius' mind set in the future.

Remus shuddered and leaned back into the couch, grumbling something that Sirius had no desire to make out the exact words of, because he either wouldn't believe them or he'd truly lose his mind in the next few seconds if this continued train of thinking really was leading his friend somewhere he knew he'd die before going.

James said something so foul Lily's first instinct was to grab her wand and scrub his mouth out. She didn't though, none of them did as they remembered not that long ago about how Neville had somehow gotten a list of passwords, and had somehow lost them. Then again, that begged the question how Sirius had gotten a hold of those? Had Neville managed to lose it on the grounds somewhere and Sirius had just happened to come across them? Circumstances of that aside, it still didn't answer the deranged question of what he was doing?! If his true purpose was to see Harry, then he was going about it in the worst and most criminally implicating way possible, which meant that the last line of reasoning really was Sirius had lost his ever loving mind. Lily had to suck in a long, deep breath and control every impulse in her not to continue throwing worried looks over at Sirius as she finished.

Lily finally found a whole new emotion to scowl at, never finding it okay for a teacher to publicly call out a student and insult him like that. Of course it wasn't nearly as bad as when Snape had done it and she recognized McGonagall was stressed out of her mind right then but it finally gave her a chance to keep reading without sounding like she was reading a death warrant.

"Give me that," James snapped at once, hands shaking nearly as bad as his voice as he violently flipped to the next page.


	14. SNAPE'S GRUDGE

James wasn't giving anyone one second to discuss that bomb of a mess, too scared to hear any kind of answer but the one that had to be true, it just wasn't possible the world would be cruel enough that his friend truly had gone insane in Azkaban. Sirius must have a logical and sound reason for doing this, but the fact that he couldn't come up with one made him read on with more anxiety than possibly any chapter before.

"Doubt anyone's going to get any sleep tonight either," Sirius muttered.

James had to swallow very hard for a moment, still praying with his every fiber that wouldn't happen. He knew Sirius must have a reason for the insane act he'd just pulled, he was clearly of sound mind enough to run for cripes sake, surely he must have been able to escape again!

Harry dearly wanted to ask why they'd all been forced to stay in the Great Hall last time for a lesser problem with Sirius only having attacked the portrait, but this time they weren't leaving. He didn't though, working out for himself the teachers must think the common rooms really were safer this time.

Despite the scared out of their mind mood for the room, they were all in the proper state to release a breath of relief for what they knew would always be good news to them.

"Despite the doors lack of security, I still doubt that's how you're pulling it off," Remus rolled his eyes.

'Would be useful, if Peter were still around' Sirius mentally sighed, hoping more than anything that if Harry learned anything at the end of the year, it was what really was going on with that story.

"And good riddance," Harry grumbled, that portrait had done far more harm than good in his opinion by constantly annoying the whole of his house.

"About time," Lily smiled, which wavered slightly when she remembered why it had been taken down in the first place. She would never really believe Sirius was out to harm anyone at that school, but it still wasn't adding up right what on earth he was doing! No one had the gall to bring it up though, James was still reading in a rather harassed manner and didn't look intent on changing that until he got a solid explanation of what was going on.

"How do you protect a portrait?" Harry mumbled.

His mom looked puzzled herself for a moment, but James was already reading.

Harry couldn't help a laugh of surprise at what he considered an overkill, considering even after all of this he still didn't feel any impending danger, but he was the only one who did.

Sirius felt the smallest of smiles trying to make an appearance on his face, left over smugness from his years in thinking he and his friends ruled the school through those secret corridors, but it just didn't hold the same pleasure now as it once would have.

Lily couldn't help herself, now she really did want to know how the boys managed to get past those sensory alarms, so she finally forced a change of subject by asking, "alright, now I'm curious. How were you getting in and out of Honeydukes?" Then she cocked her head to the side and probed further, "and besides that, how were you getting back into the passage without a wand?"

Remus couldn't help but release a surprised burst of laughter at the thunderstruck look on both her and Harry's faces, but Sirius was the one to chip his answer, "Because the sensory alarms they use only work on humans. So long as I snuck in there as a dog, the thing wouldn't go off. As for getting back in though," here he did pause and frown before huffing, "actually, I've got nothing. Suppose I hid out somewhere in the castle until the coast was clear, I still know plenty of nice little hiding holes, and snuck through a window or something from the first floor. Really shouldn't be too hard when no one would actually be looking for a dog*; or maybe I got Remus to open it after the fact. Either could work."

James couldn't stop a light smile of his own making an appearance at such a light topic to him as he commented, "it's really not as hard as you two seem to think it is to get in and out of that place."

Lily couldn't keep a triumphant smile off of her face as she watched the boys theorize a few other means for Sirius to do this, and sat back comfortably when James finally managed to keep going in normal tones.

"Which would be the crying shame of the century," Remus declared in a very serious tone of voice.

"I'll bet he loved that," Sirius snickered lightly, ignoring the horrible wince that wanted to cause. At least someone was getting their kicks out of this.

"I'm sure that was just breaking your heart," James grinned over at Harry, who was smiling pleasantly at how happy he remembered Ron was then. This instant had finally driven Scabbers clear from his mind, it really had been the first time Ron had finally gone a full day without thinking of his pet, then he winced and rubbed at his temple as he so frequently did whenever Scabbers came to mind. Why though? Was he really just trying to remember the rat was still alive? Wouldn't this be a good thing for Ron, rather than leaving a sick feeling in the pit of his gut the longer he thought on this?

"Glad someone in your group knows how to," James snickered.

Then James smile dried right up when he saw he was clearly going to read exactly what Ron was telling people, something he'd gladly never discuss again until he heard Sirius' real account on the matter.

James was trying his hardest to get through this as fast as possible, still unwilling to hear anyone's side of the story other than Sirius' himself, because there wasn't any other option. There had to be a logical, understandable reason for this madness!

'Probably because he gave me a heart attack, yelling like that' Sirius mentally grumbled, but failed to say anything out loud since he was the last one who really wanted to linger on this.

James practically hissed that out through gritted teeth in foul contempt that sentence could exist in any universe, as implausible and stupid as it was.

"Humm, there's a logic to the madness," Sirius huffed without any traces of humor.

"That poor thing," Lily cooed.

Sirius couldn't help but wince, now knowing this kid didn't really need his help to get into trouble but feeling bad it had been his fault.

"Ouch," James winced, knowing from Harry's experience how awful that was going to be, and remembering earlier how hopeful he'd been that this would happen.

"Now how would that work," Remus frowned, "actually that's pretty harsh. It's not like he did it on purpose."

"Guess I really scared the crap out of her," Sirius grumbled.

"That's just-" Lily choked, unable to decide if she was supposed to laugh at the security measures they kept trying to put up against Sirius, or continue grumbling along with the boys how unnecessary it was.

"Dang," all five of them winced that time, knowing public humiliation like that was the worst form of punishment available.

"Yeah, we remember," James shook his head in pity at that remembered incident.

"Sound advice really," Sirius nodded.

"Oh," Lily scowled, "it can't really be that funny."

"I was pointing out Malfoy's group more than anything," Harry shrugged, "and they thought it was a riot."

"It's not like he did it on purpose," Lily finally snapped at how outrageous she found that claim. "I highly doubt Neville walked up to him and gave it to him, nor would he consciously leave it lying about!"

"I agree, poor Neville really doesn't deserve all of this," James sighed.

"Yeah, that'll do it," Harry muttered while rubbing at his wrist.

That at least gave them a random laugh.

"Really James," Lily sighed, "I'm glad that seemed to make you feel better, but it's a letter, you don't need to shout."

James gave her a wayward smile, not really seeming to regret it.

Sirius cocked his head to the side, he didn't really think so honestly, but he wasn't sure what it could be about either.

Lily on the other hand was beaming, more than pleased someone like Hagrid was around just to check up on them and make sure they were okay. She couldn't help but notice how absent Remus had continued to be during this year, surely he could have made an appearance to Harry again about anything, even something as trivial as talking about the next creature in class.

"Can't honestly blame you," Remus chuckled.

"I can see his point," James snickered a bit, "probably thought they wouldn't wait on him and got there an hour early."

James looked the exact opposite, more than relieved he wouldn't have to read that all over again.

"Which reminds me," Sirius said, happy for any kind of reason to talk about anything besides himself. "How's that research going on his case?"

Harry's mouth opened with a little pop, then he went bright red in the face.

"Oh, Harry you didn't," Lily moaned as she recognized the shame on his face.

"Err, it was the Firebolt, it err honestly drove Buckbeak right out of my mind, and err-"

"Relax Harry," Remus finally released him from his clearly pent up agitation at himself, "it's not like we blame you for forgetting, honestly I kind of forgot myself until Hagrid wrote you his letter. Fighting with Hermione, Scabbers and that broom, can't really blame you."

Harry still couldn't help but feel insanely guilty, he'd promised Hagrid he would help him and he had let such things drive out a promise to his friend. The others weren't yet sure what to say though, Harry should feel rightfully guilty for this but his actions were understandable for a child his age as well. So they kept silent and hoped Hagrid would have more to say.

Lily crinkled up her nose, still wishing Hagrid would at least feed him that outside.

"A really bad and very late costume party I'd hope, but even then it hardly seems fitting," Sirius muttered.

"I'm sure that'll be a sight for the other occupants," Remus snickered.

Harry continued sinking lower into himself the longer this dragged on, continued guilt indeed dragging him around. He was now convinced that if Buckbeak didn't win this case it would be all his fault.

"Not as serious as I could," Sirius said at once, making James sigh and try to ignore his friend again.

"I swear that joke has popped up more in this book then any others," Remus grumbled with distaste.

That startled all of them, Harry most of all as he'd been expecting Hagrid to tell him off for not helping out more.

Lily began smiling all over again though, relief washing through her as she really did hope now Hagrid was going to straighten these boys out and convince them they were being idiots about how they were treating their friend.

"Thank you," Remus sighed, in full agreement it was high time someone got it through Ron's head he may have been holding a bit too much of a grudge there. No one was arguing he had a right to be mad, but it wasn't something to lose your friendship over.

Harry in particular winced horribly at that. He didn't have that many friends really, and now reflecting back on how he had treated her made him feel even worse. Between that and his residual guilt about Hagrid and Buckbeak, he looked so miserable Lily took pity on him and wrapped her arm around him for comfort. Yes, Harry really should feel guilty and she hoped it would teach him a lesson about this in the future, but since it was so clear how he was feeling now she hoped that was just as strong then and decided he was self-punishing enough.

James gave Harry a wane smile, more than happy someone had reminded his son of that. He still looked so guilty none of them dared make fun of him for this.

"And he shouldn't really blame her," Sirius sighed, "as he'd be doing the same thing if things were reversed."

"Timing," Lily couldn't help but giggle.

"Course he's going," James scoffed, "he still hasn't got a reason not to!"

"Somehow, I think that apology they owe her isn't coming," Sirius sighed as he had a very bad feeling that yet another fight was fixing to break out instead.

"What?" They all snapped.

"Damn Hermione, that's taking it too far," James scowled.

Lily sighed, she really wanted to agree that Hermione was being overtly paranoid, but decided enough was enough and put her foot down and truly defended her this time. "Alright you lot," she snapped before anyone else could say anything. "I'm sorry Sirius, but think about this from her position for a second. You've just gotten into the common rooms, the most secure part of the castle, you can't really sit around and blame her for being worried about Harry being so exposed in the open now. If it was anyone but you, you'd all agree Harry should stay in the castle where it's safe as well."

The boys hesitated before sighing and admitting that fine. The point was they weren't afraid of anything bad happening so they were looking at it another way, but decided harping on Hermione wasn't going to help.

"Harsh," Remus muttered with a wince.

"They sure toss that word around a lot," James sighed, "but if we got expelled every time we'd snuck out of the castle we'd have set some sort of record by the end of first year."

"I still wouldn't want to get into trouble," Harry reminded, "nor would I want to be asked how I'd gotten in and out."

"Almost a good thing," Sirius couldn't help but sigh, "that conversation just couldn't have ended well."

"An actual crime against your age," James nodded seriously.

"Glad you learned that lesson," Sirius approved.

"You gotten any better at that," Remus snickered, "because you still don't have a very good poker face."

"I've no idea if it fooled her," Harry said with a shrug, dearly hoping it had as he didn't really want to get caught or told on.

"Subtle," Sirius snorted.

"Damn," they couldn't help but curse, finding that some pretty bad timing.

"Don't suppose you'll just invite him," Remus sighed without any real hope.

"I doubt it," Harry shook his head.

"I kind of want to know what he was even doing around there," James sighed, it wasn't a place students normally visited without knowledge of where they were going, especially on off days.

"Jeesh Remus, you know you really could go a lesson without assigning homework," Sirius sighed.

"At least it wasn't two rolls of parchment," Harry smirked.

"I feel so bad for Neville," Lily frowned, "he obviously wants someone to hang out with. Would it really kill you to let Ron alone for the day and be with him."

Harry winced in sympathy. At the time he'd been absolutely focused on getting into Hogsmeade to be with his friend, he'd not even stopped to consider how Neville must be feeling at the time. If he sat around and thought about it now, he probably would go back and just stay with Neville for the day.

"You're lying has actually managed to get increasingly worse as time goes on," James snickered.

"Tsk tsk Remus, how could you not have covered that in class," Sirius mock scolded.

Remus ignored him and turned to Harry, asking, "did you already do your essay?"

"I'd started it," Harry said evasively, most likely meaning he'd written his name on a sheaf of parchment.

Chuckling Remus then said, "well in answer, it only has to be around them to affect them, in fact getting a vampire to eat garlic would be a miracle even if it would kill them."

"Oh bloody hell," the boys muttered, automatically annoyed whenever he showed up for any reason.

Lily scowled all over again, her hatred for that reminder never not making her want to get to her feet and give him more than a telling off.

"You know, he did catch us meeting up there quite a bit," James nodded in remembrance, "I can't really say I'm surprised if he's suspicious."

"Still a paranoid arse," Sirius scowled.

"Yes, I'm so sure he believed that clarification," Remus snorted.

"As far as he's concerned," Lily scowled, "when have you ever really been anywhere you aren't supposed to be?" She didn't really think he was referring to all of his crazy stunts he'd pulled during last year and the year before, as he probably didn't know much about those then the barest of facts, so his claim was still pretty biased.

"Like that's ever stopped him making snide comments," James huffed.

Harry rolled his eyes that time, growing quite tired of constantly being told he was supposed to spend every waking moment in that tower instead of roaming the castle like every other student.

"Like he'll figure it out," Sirius said with confidence. It had taken them doing a favor for one of the paintings just to get a hint, no way could Snape really know.

"That'll work," Remus sighed, still half wishing Harry would have told him and brought him along, having noted for quite some time it never really mentioned Neville hanging out with any of his friends, but knowing by now it wasn't worth bringing it up to Harry. It seemed all the more harsh since Harry wouldn't be back for hours, and Neville would just feel dumped.

"Wish he wouldn't come out of there, ever," Sirius huffed.

"He's already such a pro," James gave a satisfied sigh, pretending to wipe a proud tear away, though the feeling itself was real.

"A fair question," Remus snickered, a few occasions coming to mind of when they'd done something similar, though normally it was for a set up to a prank.

"Though not recommended, otherwise people are going to wonder why you're talking to yourself," Sirius snorted.

"One of the most important shops in there," James nodded seriously.

"Wouldn't surprise me if they have that store completely memorized," Sirius chuckled.

"Completely worth it then," Remus agreed.

All three boys now had nostalgic smiles creeping across their faces, having spent so many long hours in that place it almost felt as much a home to them as Hogwarts itself.

"I'm fairly sure that's because Dumbledore asked them not to, once I started hanging around in there," Remus shrugged, "added to the fear factor."

"All the visible ones," Sirius smirked.

"I don't know why they tried," Lily rolled her eyes, "what do they think they're going to find in there?"

"That's the fun of it," James explained, "finding out."

"Typical," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Gah," Sirius ground out in frustration, "what the bloody hell is with their rotten timing."

Sirius scowled and grumbled something, still unable to believe anyone could be so intent on getting one guy in so much trouble. What had Hagrid ever done to this kid?

"Trollishly, with absolutely no brains of their own," James continued as if reading that.

"No need for that James, we already knew it," Lily smirked.

"Wish your arse would get expelled for starting this mess," Remus scowled.

"Well this can't be good," Lily's frown deepened as she assessed this situation. Malfoy thought Ron was up there on his own, and if Harry helped him he'd most likely get caught. This could cause a huge mess.

Harry ground his teeth together in frustration, dearly hoping he used the opportunity he had in hand to get some well-deserved revenge on Malfoy.

"Do you ever let your friend have any fun?" Sirius demanded with a pout.

"I'm with Sirius on this one," Remus scoffed in agitation, "he deserves anything Ron would do for that comment."

Harry looked at his mother, expecting her to say something, but she simply shrugged and said, "I'd rather you not get in trouble for what I know you're about to do, but so long as you're not expelled, I agree. It'll be worth it."

James laughed boisterously, nearly bouncing in place at what this could mean.

"Yes!" All of the boys cheered, more than pleased at the opportunity's this could have.

Sirius was practically vibrating in place he was stifling his laughter so much. Harry wasn't even using a spell, which gave him all the more deniability.

James had to stop reading for several minutes, he was too busy catching his breath back with laughter. This little brat had deserved some retribution for so long now, that this visual image was one he knew he'd treasure for as long as possible. He only kept going because he recognized there was still potential mayhem to come.

"Karma," Lily smirked.

Remus almost fell off the couch laughing at Ron's very appropriate comment.

"Not much use at all really," Sirius said brightly, since neither moron would find their target with Harry keeping the cloak on.

Lily had to keep her hand firmly in lock around her mouth to try and muffle her giggling at the mental image of all of this, while the boys weren't even trying so it was getting kind of hard to hear the rest, which only made James read louder.

Remus tried to make a comment, but he was still laughing to hard and couldn't suck in the air to do so.

"You're killing me," Sirius wheezed, not looking any kind of upset if this was how he was to go.

Lily couldn't help but wince now, she hadn't seen that coming, but didn't even bother to linger on it as she knew Harry wouldn't let his friend get hurt by that thug.

"Bollocks," the four boys suddenly hissed, most traces of amusement starting to disappear at once. They really couldn't go just one chapter with pure amusement could they?

"Well it was fun while it lasted," James groaned, sinking back into his seat and closing his eyes for a moment, imagining all the horrible outcomes this could cause, before reading on in a grave tone now as he, naively he was sure, hoped nothing to bad would happen because of this.

Remus still couldn't help a lingering snicker at that. Of all the reactions he could have had, screaming in fright like that had to be his favorite.

"Well that was fun," Sirius still had a small smile in place. "Don't suppose you can do it again some time."

"I hope so," Harry laughed, his joy at getting his payback to those bullies making up for any punishment he may get. He couldn't really put a finger on it, but he got the feeling whatever punishment it was, wasn't even too bad.

"Not like anyone would believe him," Lily said without any real hope. One teacher in particular came to mind who would believe anything Malfoy says, and would love to get Harry into trouble. "As far as they know, Harry has no way to get there. They would think Malfoy was making something up to get Harry into trouble."

"Any other teacher would believe that," James grumbled, knowing the anxious tones in Lily's voice meant she was thinking of Snape being the only exception to that, just like they were.

"Not even a compliment on how brilliant that was," Sirius sighed, though he personally understood the need for urgency now. Ron could give congratulations later in private.

"Most likely. I'll doubt he's known for his imagination," Remus grumbled.

"I can think of one," Harry huffed.

"Uhoh," all five of them muttered, having honestly forgotten about that. It was true though, if Snape took this to Dumbledore like he surely would, would the headmaster do something against Harry? Would he take away his cloak even?

"Not long," Sirius scowled, "since the little brat's probably got the way memorized, all the time he's snitched on other kids."

"Very good thinking," James praised. If Harry didn't have that on him, even Dumbledore couldn't really prove what Harry had done. Maybe he really would get away with this!

"Bloody hell," Remus groaned, "couldn't even make it back to the dormitory."

"Oh for the love of Merlin!" Sirius cried in exasperation. "Him! Why would he even go there first, that's not even on the way to Gryffindor tower!"

"Suspicious, nosy, paranoid, git-" James kept grumbling under his breath, and probably would have kept going if Sirius didn't nudge him and say, "and many more mate, but keep going."

Sighing in resignation, James accepted.

"So what?" Remus snipped quietly.

Lily face palmed, not even needing to point out how ineffective that really was.

"Good luck with that," James sighed without any confidence. He was still trying to console himself that this would have to be taken up with McGonagall before something too bad could be done, and she wouldn't do anything that couldn't be proven. James was confident that she actually couldn't prove he'd snuck into Hogsmeade, so aside from maybe some house points being taken away by Snape for, well being Snape, nothing too bad should happen.

Lily ground her teeth together in frustration, more than sick of him trying to dole out punishment for Harry when he didn't have anything to do with him.

"Well I am always in trouble, but why would you bring it up now," Sirius quipped, smirking wildly and at least making Harry laugh, who hadn't heard the never ending array that joke could be used. Not yet. Give it till the end of his seventh year, maybe by then.

"One's probably his own heart," Remus hissed into Sirius' ear.

"He'd have to have one first," Sirius muttered right back, trying to suppress a snicker.

Sirius scowled with the height of distaste, a horrible dog joke coming to mind that made him want to strangle Snivellus all over again.

"Best recommendation at this point," Lily agreed, rubbing her brows in preparation for what could come.

Remus couldn't help but grind his teeth in frustration at this continued and obvious favoritism, even in the way he addressed the students.

"A chat," Sirius scoffed in disgust, but James didn't even bother since they were all aware of what a load of bull that was.

"I get the feeling you could be a prize winning actor and you couldn't convince him of that look," James sighed.

"Not a bad comparison, though I still favor the hippogriff," Sirius nodded in agreement.

The three boys on the couch lost it, cracking up with unrestrained laughter at Harry's attempts to play that off. Lily couldn't help a twitching smile as well, snickers coming through as she really did picture this from some other teachers point of view and how that would sound.

James was quick to get his breath back though, knowing that if Harry could keep this up in front of Snape, he should get out from McGonagall in no time, and just be more careful the next time he went out. Also he realized he owed Harry an apology, that was a beautiful on the spot fib.

"I didn't know the form was body part specific," Remus was still chuckling in between bits of speech, "maybe someone should specify that."

That dried up most of their humor, each of them scowling at the threat that he needed to back up now on the tip of all of their tongues. He had no right to be getting in Harry's face like that! His bully like behavior was getting progressively worse as the years wore on, and it was ripping at every one of their nerves.

"Now that's just a tad presumptuous," Sirius defended halfheartedly, trying for a smile he no longer felt.

James quickly snapped his mouth shut with worry, his mind quickly flickering to Neville and wondering if he could possibly be convinced to lie for Harry for this very important matter... there was a chink he hadn't thought of. Glancing up at his son, he comforted himself that he still didn't think any of this was bad enough for expulsion. After all they'd been caught out all the time, so there really was no way it would go that far bad. With that slightly comforting thought he kept going.

"Didn't even know he could form that," Sirius hissed.

Lily opened and closed her mouth several times in outrage, so many insults welling up she didn't know where to start! The very first of which was 'stop treating him like James!' While an outsider may be able to see the point Snape was making, his opinion he'd just foisted was completely biased! The other boys were muttering their own foulings, but James was far too used to this kind of thing, no matter how enraged it made him to hear it being thrown at his son, so he forced himself to keep going, wanting to find out the punishment already.

"There's the bright side," Remus sighed.

James gave a wane smile, looking over to his spitting image and stating, "to be perfectly honest, I actually find more of your mother's spirit in you then me, looks aside obviously."

Lily giggled a bit, not at all disagreeing with that statement. Sirius and Remus exchanged a look before shrugging, agreeing out loud with that. Harry clearly did have his father's knack for causing trouble, though not nearly in the same way. In fact if they did pile it up, Harry was a lot like Lily in her school days. Maybe that was what was pissing Snape off more than anything.

"Exceedingly is a bit much-" James began, but one snort of disbelief from his wife and James slunk back to the book with only a semichasted look.

"Now that was just rude," Sirius grumbled, completely ignoring Lily's now rolling eyes.

Remus was torn between wanting to laugh in remembrance of the many times he could count James acting like a loon in front of his peers, what he thought Snape meant, and wanting to defend his friend, so he was left with an odd expression which the others ignored.

"Oh yes he did," Lily rolled her eyes with far more affection than her husband ever would have believed coloring her tone in speaking of this. Harry looked mildly startled, but she was still going "but to his credit, his arrogance started to wain out, something I don't think Snape ever noticed."

"At least you did," James smiled over at her, earning a bright curl of the lips right back.

"Now that I absolutely believe," Sirius agreed.

While James had looked mildly annoyed while reading this, it was hardly the most insulting thing he'd ever heard come from this guy's mouth. No, the worst part was him saying this to his son! Harry didn't know a thing about him, this definitely wasn't some of the things he'd like being boasted around. He kept it bottled up though, pride and glee cracking through when Harry finally cracked and said what needed saying.

"People are taking a lot of shots at you this year aren't they," Sirius grimaced in disgust.

"Least Harry keeps them in their place," Remus pacified.

Harry was honestly surprised, they didn't seem nearly as upset about this as they had that previous chapter, but then he realized that they probably heard this type of thing so often from Snape that it just rolled off of them. Coming from someone like Marge had hurt far worse because of the terrible way she'd slammed it into Harry without ever having even met him.

Lily made a 'tch' noise of disbelief, knowing he wouldn't dare raise a wand to her son, or he'd lose that whole arm. Besides, he definitely deserved that one.

All three boys twitched with discomfort at that unfriendly reminder, and Harry frowned in confusion. Of course he remembered that coming up during the first book, and how they'd managed to hedge around the question, never having gotten the full story. What about it could be so bad that the three of them looked almost as bad as when he'd thrown that in Snape's face?

James looked the opposite of eager about explaining this, and hoping to forestall Harry asking, kept reading in hopes something else would distract him.

James face twisted with even more unease, this was the opposite of what he'd been hoping for. What could he do though? Either he turn and tell Harry now about the worst fight the Marauders ever had, or he let Snape come up with some half-truth that he would have seen which would paint a far more horrible light.

He was still debating, dearly wanting to put this off, when Sirius released a horrible suffering sigh and groaned, "alright, alright. This is something I never wanted you to hear, but I guess I'd rather it come from me then him."

Harry was frowning in genuine concern at Sirius as he started to explain what exactly had happened that night. Starting with how he'd taunted Snape by telling him Remus' secret location under the Whomping Willow and how everything had spiraled out of control from there. He left out the part where his friends had blamed him as much as Snape for the cruel prank, how they hadn't spoken to him for months afterwards. He didn't bother with the defenses he'd used back then, how he'd never have believed Snape would take him at his word and really go check it out, no he wouldn't try and save face so many years later in front of Harry.

Once he was done he braced himself, eyeing Harry with more fear than any of them could ever imagine could cross his face. Sirius couldn't help it though, he honestly was expecting for Harry to have a sudden revelation. Now that he realized he was capable of murder, whether unintentionally or not, could this possibly jog Harry's memories? Make him remember something that would connect what the Ministry was saying about him in his own time? He'd seemed adamant so far, but...

"So, it was an accident," Harry confirmed, watching him critically. At the stunned look on his Godfather's face, Harry's relaxed into his more natural easy going look and continued, "err, at least, well I understand you'd never do anything like that on purpose. Sure it was dumb, but I can hardly judge and say I've never done something that bad before."

"You've hardly sent Ron into the den of one of your best friends the night he was to turn into a werewolf," Sirius rebutted, still looking like he was sitting on a hot seat. James elbowed him, hard, making Sirius slink away from him and rub at his side absently.

Remus was quick to say, "knock it off Sirius, this is something long over. Harry's decided the same thing we did, err, in the end." He finished lamely, not really meeting anyone's eyes.

Lily was watching all of them with general mixed feelings. She vividly remembered the time in school where four Marauders became three for quite a few months. This had happened a few days after she'd officially stopped talking to Snape, so she hadn't really known anyone who even had the slightest idea why this could be. All she knew was that after that terrible Quidditch game where Sirius had been knocked out of the air, things seemed to have patched up between the lot. She found it fascinating to finally get the full story on this, but kept her opinion of it to herself since it was basically the same as Harry's.

Sirius still looked miserable at the reminder, James and Remus very uncomfortable with the whole topic, though both of them still clearly defending him made it clear they didn't really hold a grudge anymore. Still, when Harry didn't say anything else, James decided to turn to the book and managed to read out whatever tosh Snape had strung together from that.

"Is that what he thought?" Sirius muttered, still slumped into the couch and looking as surely as any other time his name had been mentioned so far, this possibly being the least pleasant reminder to date! James absently kicked him to get him to shut it, still wanting to get past this as fast as possible.

"Still doesn't prove a thing," Remus muttered.

"Honestly I think we'd all prefer that," Lily groused.

"You've gotten so much better at those on the spot type lies," James praised with warmth, ignoring Lily's rolling eyes at thinking the same thing.

"Okay, getting caught with them is still kind of bad," Remus agreed with a wince as they could possibly implicate Harry in some other bad things, "but it's still not proof he'd been to Hogsmeade."

"Why would he?" Sirius demanded, finally distracted enough to look grumpy at this particular subject now. "Is he baiting Harry, it's not like he could know what that was."

"That's all I can think of," James agreed.

"Yes," Remus said, his eyes lighting up with glee all of a sudden. "If Harry goes with that, or if Snape doesn't believe him and tries for himself," he trailed off with a surprising burst of laughter that left Harry and Lily stumped. James looked quite pleased though, and seemed to be hoping something along the same lines. He didn't give the two out of the know the chance to ask though.

"Actually, he's not too far off," Lily muttered.

James lost it for a moment, forced to stop reading so that he could let out his own bursting laughter in anticipation for what was about to happen. Sirius and Remus weren't fairing much better, their faces bright red with anticipation for this. James wrangled himself back under control and continued almost normally,

Lily's curiosity was beginning to wane out as she said, "are you lot really laughing like idiots because he can't get it to work? That's hardly so funny."

"Wait for it," James insisted, his eyes shining with so much held in laughter it was a wonder he could still see straight.

"Yes!" Sirius cheered, that had been exactly what they'd been waiting for! Harry didn't bother to ask this time, but instead bounced eagerly so he could hear the punchline of this built up joke as well.

All of the boys lost it, Sirius even falling off the couch laughing and still unable to stop himself. Lily was watching them with a combination of annoyance and repressed humor. She dearly wanted to ask if they'd somehow specialized this just for Snape, but somehow expected otherwise. She remembered one memorable occasion where a Ravenclaw had come across some old scrap of parchment Peter had been holding, and the then Head Boy had demanded to know what it was. When Peter had said nothing, the boy had rightfully not believed that having prior experience with all of the Marauders, and took it away and performed a similar command on the paper. Lily had never seen what had become of all this, but the boy had looked highly offended, and Peter was cracking up laughing while telling that it was a joke bit of parchment where if you said your name, it was charmed to insult you. With this memory floating back to the surface, she could no longer repress it and was laughing downy near as hard as the others, even as James sucked air back into his lungs and read out the next bit,

Sirius hadn't recovered from the first comment, and was remarkably able to double up his amusement, though how that was possible none of them had been sure. Maybe it was an overreaction, it really wasn't even that funny or creative an insult, but they all had the sneaking suspicion that Sirius had been under so much stress for literally all day now, he was letting loose a lot of pent up feelings in releasing as much laughter as possible in these opportune moments now, so still snickering along himself, James kept reading.

Sirius couldn't have made the joke right now even if he wanted to, he was too invested in continuing to listen to his most prized possession insult someone in the most poetic of justice ways possible.

"My sentiments exactly," Remus agreed fondly, still watching Sirius come back to earth just slightly as his exploding laughter began backing down in cackling, still rubbing at his ribs and brushing tears out of his eyes as he listened to the final one.

"That," Harry told them, slightly red in the face himself from laughing so hard, "was bloody brilliant. How on earth did you get it to do that?"

"Charm wasn't that hard," Remus waved away, "all you have to do is command it to obey you while stating your name and those kinds of things will pop up."

"The reason Padfoot here lost his arse during it," James continued while looking down at his friend with all the amusement he had, "is that he tried to convince us for ages to pull this on him during school. Just leave it about one day and Snape was sure to do it, the pompous git would never not if he knew it belonged to us. He's now getting to witness a prank we'd never done."

"And enjoying every last second of it," Sirius murmured, face flushed with excitement as he sat upright and looked at the book with the first real affection. This was still the worst possible day of his life hands down, but that little moment right there had almost made it all worth it.

In between girlish giggles, Lily managed to get out, "well I hope that convinces Snape enough that you haven't been up to anything. You could have just as easily gotten that from Zonko's along with the other stuff Ron got you."

James really hoped that were the case, as he didn't have any more to go at Harry with.

"What on earth?" Sirius began in surprise, having not seen this coming one bit, but James wasn't giving him the chance to question it too much as he read.

"Why!?" Lily spluttered in shock. Of all the teachers for him to have summoned and consult, why him?

"Do you think he knew?" Remus asked curiously. "That it used to be mine? I really didn't think he'd recognize it."

"Well he did stalk us enough," James said with a perturbed look, "but even if he did put that together, and bloody hell that's a leap since he'd have no way of knowing how Harry got that, that it was the exact same one even, what's he expect you to do? Admit to it all? You don't even know Harry has it."

They were all stumped beyond reason of Snape's logic with this, but hoped that reading would help them out.

"Bet I was every bit as confused by that summons," Remus told, still finding it odd now with the proper backstory.

"Be happy that was mild rather than blistering," Lily muttered into Harry's ear, who nodded despite not having needed that, he now understood better than ever the animosity between his family and Snape.

'Pretty sure that's not all for Harry's circumstances' James mentally grumbled, imagining Snape might have summoned Remus just to have a little more time to berate him in front of Harry.

"I can only imagine," Remus laughed for now, fairly sure how mind boggling he'd be at Harry coming across that on his own.

"You choose now to freeze up eh?" Sirius demanded with a crooked smirk, since he was normally the one to come up with the best excuses of the lot of them.

"I'd like to see you do one better with this," Remus shot right back, even now scrambling for a reason Harry would have this, while pressing past the shock of him having it, and probably having to skip over several bumpy memories in the process of shock.

Lily gave a derisive snort of mirth as she mocked, "oh please, it insulted him, it didn't curse him. When did he become so dramatic?"

None of the boy's fancied adding on to that, torn between wanting to laugh and fearing anything they did say Lily still wouldn't be pleased with no matter what she said now.

"I would have without the look," Harry shrugged, "I was as wound up as you trying to come up with some way out of this."

"I'd take his word on this," James said with a straight face, "call me crazy, but for some odd reason I think he knows what he's talking about."

Sirius began snickering again, and Remus didn't look much better.

"Oi," Sirius hooted in protest, "this was my idea!"

"And I called it childish then to," Remus reminded with a smirk in place.

"What did he expect?" Lily rolled her eyes in contempt. "Did he honestly think you were going to side with him, try and get Harry into trouble for this?"

"Still have no idea," Harry sighed.

That stopped James cold, sharing a stunned look with his friends as they realized they may have been wrong, and Snape really had made that leap. Harry understood far better now than he would have then, asking, "why on earth would he think one of you had given it to me?"

"I've no idea," Sirius admitted, head cocked to the side as he eyed the book, "guess he does know it was ours, maybe the nicknames or something gave it away, but what is he thinking? I gave it to you? There's no way you'd have accepted it considering what you think of me then-" he covered the horrible wince poorly, but kept going anyways. "That means he either thinks you inherited it from James, or Remus gave it to you just this year."

"While I can kind of see him thinking I'd do it," Remus shrugged, "why would he call me in to ask? Even if I had, what's it to him if I did, it's not illegal."

"Trying to trip you up maybe," James offered, "showing special treatment to Harry. As for him getting it from me, that could also be true, he hasn't caught Harry with it the previous two years so for all he knows..." he trailed off, but no one had any real idea what Snape was really thinking.

Even Lily felt stumped trying to understand his logic in this, though this stung far more than she was expecting it to. There was a time where she had perfectly understood her best friends every motion and idea before he said it, now she couldn't begin to fathom this one. It was more than disconcerting to realize how far apart they'd come, no matter how many times she realized it.

With no answers, James was hoping Remus might have some better insight while talking to Snape so read.

"Well if there's one thing he can do, it's play dumb," Sirius agreed with a smirk, taking the smack Remus gave him for the tone without remorse.

Remus' face gave an odd twitch, guessing that having to say any of those names in this time period would have been pretty wrenching for him.

"Timing!" Sirius cried with glee, Harry's best friend getting major brownie points with him if he stormed in and backed all of this up like he hoped.

"Well that's not an encouraging start," Lily groaned, eying the book with fear as she realized what Snape would have, why would he be so out of breath and freaking out if Harry wasn't supposed to be in trouble?

"I'm so proud," James fake sniffled, using the corner of the page to pretend to wipe away a tear, while real pride was welling up in him for Ron cottoning on and being the perfect alibi right when Harry needed him.

"I'm positive it was taking everything in me not to burst out laughing at that display," Remus snickered now.

"Thank Merlin," Sirius breathed, having feared Snape might still try to confiscate that and keep it away from Harry, but then his eyes lit up all over again as he crowed, "oh sweet! Do you lot know what this could mean?"

"Harry and Ron get to go rub it in the twins face they got away with this," James answered.

"Well that to," Sirius agreed, before turning on Remus and nearly bouncing in pleasure as he said, "but, this could be your window! You've been stalling all this time probably because of how weird it would be for you to get started explaining this to him, but this could be perfect for you! Pulling him aside and explaining the manufacturing comment to Harry."

His eyes were shining with so much bright hope and happiness, Remus didn't have the heart to tell him that he doubted this as much as Sirius thought it to be true. He'd made it perfectly obvious in this future he wanted as little to do with Harry as possible, which made him feel like he was being skinned alive now, but it had been so long since he'd seen Sirius back to full jubilant life he only nodded and added his agreement he hoped this to be true, while bracing himself by leaning away in preparation for the opposite.

The other three noticed what Sirius refused to take note of, and were all equally torn at both possibilities. James couldn't think of anything to say though, deciding not to address it until after whatever happened.

"Subtle," Lily muttered under her breath, though not loud enough to interrupt as she was just as eager as anyone for Remus blatantly pulling Harry aside, a good start.

"What a way to start," Sirius cackled, ignoring the growing ache when he realized that they hadn't exactly gone somewhere more private like this chat deserved.

"You really threw us off right then," Harry shrugged with a happy smile, "I later made the joke you were better at predictions then Trelawney."

"Nah," James laughed, "just more insight."

"Really though, I think I would have been more than impressed at the turn of events," Remus gave a wane smile, all the while shriveling up on the inside as it was more than obvious his tone was scolding and not nearly as approachable as he'd been hoping for.

Sirius was the only one who was holding out hope how this could turn around.

"Ouch," Lily winced, finding that particularly harsh while Sirius lost any enthusiasm and slumped back into the couch with a new weight added on top of his chest, this continued attitude making him feel like pulling out his hair.

"Really Remus," Harry groaned, looking like a kicked puppy. While at the time he had given up without argument for the sake of some answers, right now his tone equally matched the shock and disappointment of the others.

"That's it, you're officially disowned," Sirius huffed, his voice just not up to its normal teasing tone as he watched Remus curiously. "You've turned into an old killjoy, and I'm going to need your Marauders card back."

He held out his hand expectantly, but Remus didn't play along. He was busy twisting away at the hem of his robes, counting every instance of how he'd acted in this future and how the longer this dragged on the more he was convinced Sirius was right. He had changed, and he didn't like it one little bit. It truly scared the crap out of him what had become of him.

James gave a pitiful sigh, he wanted to join in with Sirius, maybe make a crack Remus had just taken it for nostalgic reasons or some nonsense, but he was so emotionally drained by this point he just couldn't bring himself to do it, so he pressed on loudly, just hoping that this would all somehow look better in tomorrow's morning light.

Harry rolled his eyes, clearly not feeling that way now, but Remus was doing a good enough job of looking contrite about doing this he didn't see the point in adding on.

"Some of us would," Sirius grumbled with an eye roll, and Remus flinched like Sirius had really just tried to hurt him. Sirius felt guilty at once, realizing his friend had spent all day giving him any and all comfort and convincing him he hadn't turned into this horrible thing everyone else said, and here he was doing the opposite for his friend. So he instead leaned over and whispered into his ear, "of course you'd insist on coming no matter what we said, no matter how stupid you found it."

Remus just grunted, not finding Sirius' picking on him as comforting as Sirius had hoped, so Sirius decided he'd have to try something else.

"We've met," James repeated with an eye roll, "oh yeah, a few years back maybe, not sure what happened in the meantime, think some kid got slimed at one point, it's all a blur." James had been trying to get a rise out of Remus as well, but it was clear Remus had all but shut down for the night and was only listening with the vaguest of attention.

"You're right Moony," Sirius nodded in agreement, "that has come up the most in this book, I think it's doing it on purpose just for me."

"Yet another reason I've hated this year," James grumbled when the other didn't respond.

"Oh Merlin," Remus groaned at the smile that blossomed on said man's face, that shook him out of his shock to look even more disgusted with himself if that were possible. "Now even I'm doing it! Now I know something's happened to me, I must have had head trauma at some point."

Sirius was too busy being pleased Remus had just responded to anything to back up the joke.

"Ouch," Lily winced for Harry, while James looked oddly torn between wanting to agree with Lily that this had been way too harsh, and wanting to laugh that James had risked his life for less sometimes just for the sake of a joke. He'd been pretty careless in his youth, he'd admit that about some of the stunts he'd pulled around school, and Remus doing this now felt as low as Snape calling him on it earlier. Maybe they were right, maybe Remus really had changed, and it wasn't making anyone feel any better. Could they really say anything though, Remus was his own person and if he really had moved on or somehow changed in this time they didn't really think they had a right to criticize him for it. It didn't make Lily feel any better about what he'd just said, wanting more than anything to snap at him he didn't really have a right to say anything for them, but then she really looked at Remus and saw that he was fixing to have his own break down right along with Sirius if something didn't change soon and she held it in.

Remus refused to say what he was really thinking though, that this scary new person carrying his name was acting so new, had he changed so much towards Sirius as well? He'd been so positive this whole time he must be helping Sirius, but now...he remembered back to the news that Sirius would be given a Dementor's Kiss if he was caught, and the bland way he'd reacted in the future to the news. He'd had a mini coronary over the realization then that he hadn't seemed to care one way or the other, was that really true? Was he such a completely different person, he actually wasn't even helping out Sirius? All of these things kept smashing around in his mind like gongs, and between that and his exhausted body physically, it was all he could do to keep listening to James read and keep his surroundings in focus without slipping further into a mental breakdown.

"Maybe for the best for now," James nodded absently.

"I'll bleeding lose my mind if she did," Sirius sighed without any real heat, still far too concerned with the way Remus was slowly starting to look just as bad as him whenever he came up in the story and not liking it one little bit.

It would be a cruel twist if Harry had gotten out of that mess just to get put right back in it by McGonagall, but right now getting a detention in school would be a minor comedy compared to their other issues.

Harry made a terrible noise of protest, finally stopping looking at both of his uncles like he was making sure they were still breathing from their combined stress, and abruptly shoved back into other matters.

"Alright you lot," Lily sighed miserably, "we really do need to get to bed."

"But Mum-" Harry began protesting at once, looking at the book as if it were Buckbeak himself, and if he just kept reading he'd know for sure everything was going to be okay.

"No," Lily said with finality. Trying, and failing, to keep her eyes from flickering over to Remus she began getting to her feet, walking over to Sirius and taking the book away from him. One glance at his friend and the protest died on his lips. With a heavy sigh they all got to their feet and headed for the stairs, except Remus who simply slumped over and crashed right there on the couch.

Sirius came down a few moments later to drape a blanket over him and make sure all the lights were off before the house went silent.

* * *

*So we know why the second wouldn't work, as we all know that Remus isn't helping him though they still don't, but I'm actually kind of stumped on how Sirius was still getting out of the castle once he got in. The way I suggested has some holes in that if they used the Homenum Revelio spell, wouldn't it still show a dog? I thought the spell would just show if anyone else at all was in the room, plus it would be a real chore for Padfoot to actually make it from the seventh to the first floor to get out of a window or something without being spotted by anyone! Not the paintings, or the ghosts or, anyone! Suggestions would be lovely and appreciated.


	15. THE QUIDDITCH FINALE

Thank you so much to everyone who submitted last chapter, especially guest reviewers! I personally always send PM's to those I can, so I just want those without an account to know how much I love you all as well. I realize in reading your reviews I may have been underestimating the power of Padfoot the Marauder, no matter how pissed he was he wouldn't go galavanting through the corridors, he still would have been smart about sneaking back out, so thank you all!

* * *

Harry came down the stairs the next day, and realized he and his parents were the only ones up. Remus still had his face burrowed into the couch cushions and looked unlikely to move for days he was snoring so loudly, and Sirius was nowhere in sight probably meaning he was still in his own room. Harry easily spotted his parents talking quietly in the kitchen, with the baby in the highchair at the table.

When Harry walked in though, he found they weren't just whispering in light of the guest on their couch, but found Lily looking rather strained and throwing protective looks at her son while James was fidgeting with unease, but both stopped when they saw Harry and tried for a smile.

"What's up?" He tried for a casual tone of voice, sitting down and watching them, beginning to worry at once what new terrible thing could have happened during the night.

Lily walked over at once and began buttering him some toast that was already sitting in waiting, while beginning in the same hushed tones, "you've ah, you're still adamant dear about us not leaving here, yes?"

Harry found this an odd way to start, but nodded in absolute agreement. He couldn't explain the feeling, not even to himself, or how he could even know such a thing, but every time one of them had made to leave he'd gotten a tingling up his spine, an absolute certainty something would happen to them if they left.

James, while unsurprised at the answer, continued while throwing worried looks back into the other room, "right, didn't really think that had changed, it just brings up a problem tonight is all."

It took Harry a moment for it all to click together, then he gave his own startled look to the huddled figure on the couch. "He, he's going to-" he tried to say, not really even sure how to say it, and the idea still a little so foreign he wasn't even sure if he could have even if he'd found the words.

"Change into a werewolf, yes," James agreed as if this were as normal as walking the dog. His face made it clear though this was not to be taken lightly as he continued, "problem is son, he's never done it here, for ah, obvious reasons." He inclined his head to the toddler in the highchair who was currently playing with mashed cereal, though he was getting more in his flyaway hair then actually in his mouth. An empty bottle on the counter showed that he'd already had his proper breakfast, so the parents seemed content to leave him be for now while they talked.

Lily was quick to jump in at the wide eyed look Harry was starting to get, "don't get us wrong dear, we know how to take the proper precautions, it's just, werewolves aren't to be reasoned with. They're purely violent during that state, so it would be best if he weren't here, but if you're sure he can't leave-"

"I'm positive," he insisted back, for the first time starting to feel guilty for his presence here, which was clearly putting a hardship on his family. He wished he could understand why they couldn't leave, or at least give them a reason, but nothing was coming to him.

The parents exchanged one more look before nodding, and James said, "alright, just have to make do then." He gave Harry a genuine smile, clearly thinking the opposite of his son in that moment, as he excused himself and went up the stairs.

He came back down a while later, Sirius wide alert which meant they must have continued a private conversation upstairs, and while Harry was curious enough he may have asked for details, the two were now gently trying to wake up Remus and Harry staved off his inquires, feeling it improper since he wasn't sure just how much of that conversation without Remus was rude. He'd wait until later, maybe the next meal, when he had no doubts it would be brought up again with Remus himself.

It took a long time for Remus to fully be roused, and he was clearly not happy about it, but a little food in all of them and then they were all lounged about in the living room again, Remus' eyes were still partially closed but since he had the baby in his lap it was clear he was awake enough as Sirius started. Remus was also keeping a firm lid on those lingering feelings from the night before. Like with everything else that had happened to Harry so far, he was going to wait it out, and just keep praying that Harry would come across whatever was causing him to act like a stranger in his time with Harry, and refuse to act any differently until then.

Despite the new day, they all vividly remembered the last thing they'd heard, that the innocent hippogriff was being sentenced to death, and it did not start them in a good mood, still hoping somehow an appeal could take place, or something to stop those Malfoys from winning this petty argument over the animal's life.

The fact that Hermione had received the news via a letter, instead of from Hagrid himself, wasn't boding well.

"Considering Hagrid's usual bad penmanship, it's a wonder I could make it out at all," Harry sighed, looking for all the world like his own pet was caught up in this mess he felt so sorry for his friend.

That only made Harry feel ten times worse. He'd let Hagrid down! Now it really was his fault what was happening to Buckbeak! Maybe if he'd done more, "oh, Harry," Lily cut off his train of thought, brushing his hair back from his forehead for a moment, and smiling when it fell right back into place and catching her son's attention. "You can't blame yourself dear. Unless you pulled a stunt like Malfoy and paid someone off, which is bound to be what happened since the case against Buckbeak should have been solid, there's nothing you could have done love."

Harry sighed, not at all agreeing, but for some odd reason when he thought about the hippogriff in terms of actually being dead, something didn't feel right. It wasn't concrete, like he was missing something about this. He couldn't put that into words any better than his guilt though so he kept silent and this time really hoped his instincts were right.

Lily sighed in relief, happy the system hadn't completely failed in that they were following procedure, then began gritting her teeth in frustration as it did occur to her that it probably wouldn't be any more helpful than the trial.

"That was the best thing he could have said right then," Sirius beamed, happy those two had finally begun trying to make up.

"Gah," Sirius blanched, feeling extremely sorry for Ron in that moment, no boy wanted to deal with a weepy girl.

"The poor dear," Lily cooed, "she's been stressed out of her mind all year, I'm betting she's just finally reached her breaking point with all of this."

"Completely understandable," James nodded, making Lily roll her eyes again.

"Well, she's a tough one," Remus grinned, opening up one eye and smiling lightly at how quickly she got control of herself. Not that he hadn't already been aware Hermione wasn't one to mess with, but the idea of a crying girl scared him as much as any male.

"Hope that finally sooths Ron," Sirius smiled all the more.

All three boys snickered a little at that, even with Buckbeak's horrid fate being the one to make this happen, it was still good to see these two finally work this out.

"There's the bright side," James smirked.

Sirius winced and Harry hardly looked pleased at the reminder, knowing the only reason he hadn't ignored that rule and used his cloak would be Hagrid's reaction. He couldn't help but feel guilty that clearly his latest stunt must have even caused Harry to be restricted from even crossing the grounds like a normal student.

"That's not true," Lily snapped at once, not believing that one little bit. "Hagrid could have set up the best case in the world and just didn't pay them a dime." She detested that the longer this carried on, the more it ashamed her to work for the Ministry at all if this was how they were handling themselves. What they did last year, now this, it was a wonder Hagrid didn't lose his temper for being trampled on so much by the lot of them.

Sirius was twisted with absolute hatred, his pity for that hippogriff possibly mirrored as he couldn't help but wonder for the first time how his own trial would have gone. Had a Death Eater done the same thing then, and he'd probably been so wrecked he'd had no way to defend himself, and... he said a few foul things aloud which the others all took as his defense for that cruel situation before he kept reading loudly so as not to be questioned.

"I swear I'll take every detention in that school if someone would just curse this kid already," James snarled.

"I'll bet Hagrid would even look the other way at this point," Remus nodded in agreement.

"Oh, bloody hell this is getting as depressing as talking about me," Sirius groaned, truly feeling for Hagrid and what he was going through. It just wasn't right all this happening to him, while Malfoy got away with anything he wanted!

"How can he laugh about this!" Lily spluttered with shock and disdain. "I just do not understand how a child could laugh about someone truly being in pain!"

"The same way Dudley can watch Harry grow up the way he did and think it's okay," James looked purely murderous at the reminder he gave himself, but it was as good a comparison as he could give.

It made sense this didn't make Lily feel better, but she stopped questioning it and just felt pity for all of those boys, wondering what had happened to good parenting.

"Finally," Remus nodded, now completely awake and looking on eagerly as Harry clearly wasn't holding his friend back this time.

Sirius looked like he'd just found the Holy Grail.

His stunned reaction was kind though, compared to Lily who broke out laughing. She really couldn't help herself. Between the boys shocked expressions and that awful child finally realizing that his words could hurt other people, she was left a giggling mess, which the others were very quick to jump in on.

Harry came out of it first, looking very dearly like he wanted to go and hug his friend for her actions. The others were only just coming out of it, still hoping more than anything it didn't end there. Malfoy had been a pain to them for so long now, that he deserved whatever retribution the trio saw fit to give.

"Can't even rightly blame them," Remus agreed, happily tweaking the baby's fingers and toes to the kid's amusement as he clutched at the poking digits.

"Are you kidding me," James cackled, still looking giddy as he continued, "Ron's trying to stop her! Why!?"

"Delayed reaction of shock," Harry offered, he'd been the same way, never having seen that friend be so violent before.

"Oh now he's in for it," Sirius said eagerly, now convinced that this had to be the best chapter in the book if she used even a portion of the spells he deserved.

"Really?" James demanded, still sounding more amused than anything. "Are they so dull they don't realize, hey, my friend was just attacked, I should help."

"Kind of makes you wonder just how much friends they really are," Remus agreed with a raised brow at quite the calm reactions.

"Bollocks," Lily grumbled, having wanted to offer her own suggestion of a curse for that twisted little brats comments for this.

"As he should be," Sirius nodded in complete agreement.

"Bet that would have doubled if he hadn't intervened," Remus added on with a laugh.

"You and me both sister," James nodded.

"Does Hermione not count," Lily asked lightly, her attention still more fondly placed on the girl then normal as she noticed the gender specific reprimand.

"Oh that always turns fun," Sirius snickered, acting like one had been placed on him.

"Sucks when that happens, means someone's going to have to be a third," Remus said randomly, figuring these three friends wouldn't care, but also remembering if this had only happened days ago Hermione would be in an embarrassing spot.

"What?" They all muttered in confusion, surely she'd been just behind them?

"Weird," James unnecessarily pointed out, drawing the word our extensively. The first time that had happened he'd put it down to the boys not paying attention to her backtracking, but twice?

"Someone please tell me they've figured out how she pulled that off this time," Lily huffed, growing exasperated this third year had her stumped.

"Time!" Sirius grumbled, scowling at the ceiling as he ran his hand through his hair in frustration. "Curse my drinking when she told me about this, but I know it's something to do with time!"

"At least say what you do remember," Remus sighed, knowing even that was a miracle depending on how much he'd consumed and how long ago this was.

"Met a girl at the Three Broomsticks once who's an Unspeakable in the Department of Mysteries. I bought her a drink, and ah indulged on my own, and we got to talking about some experiment she was working on. It had something to do with traveling back in time for short periods, but bloody hell if they actually got it to work. That girl kept going on about someone named Eloise Mintumble,* and the only reason I remember that name is because she kept saying it as el'mumble, which made me laugh and fall off the stool. I don't even remember the girl I'd been speaking to anymore, just that something happened to that Eloise, something to do with time."

He finished with an annoyed huff, clearly not going to remember any other specifics but it just felt like the only explanation for how Hermione was pulling all of this off. Between her being able to pull off multiple classes and her disappearances that shouldn't be possible, time magic really was the only way she could be pulling that off, but she was a third year! Even Hermione couldn't possibly be that advanced!

While the others recognized it wasn't much to go on, it was still slightly better than before where they had no idea whatsoever.

While this seemed like a reasonable enough explanation, they all knew Hermione was the type of kid who would most certainly have gone to class and asked permission to leave for the restroom again.

Even if that had been true, the idea was dashed by that.

"She didn't like, go to a bathroom to cry again or something," James offered, trying to think up some normal explanation for perhaps their over exaggeration.

"As pissed as she was at Malfoy," Sirius' tone showed his disagreement. "I'd like to think she skived class and went to hunt Malfoy down without interference."

Remus couldn't help snickering away at the thought, knowing Hermione was the last kid who'd do something like that, but also knew Sirius was speaking more from experience at his own doing of that so didn't say anything.

"Saw that coming," Lily muttered without the usual amount of humour it would have had if not for the missing girl.

"Least Ron hasn't made a joke about another troll getting in yet," James muttered.

"I insist it would still go the other way first," Sirius disagreed with a small grin, picturing that girl taking on all three of those Slytherins at once would be mayhem, for the boys.

"Well, found her," Remus said in surprise, any number of reasons crossing through his mind why she'd be up there.

"Err," Lily began, unsure where to go with that, this hadn't at all been what she was expecting.

"I'd have let her keep sleeping," James grimaced.

"How on earth did she forget?" Sirius wanted to laugh, but it was just too weird for her. "She was literally on her way there before she disappeared."

When no one answered, Sirius turned back to the book and hoped Hermione might actually answer.

He was so confused he didn't even pause to laugh that he'd just mimicked Harry, it was a valid question.

"Actually he didn't question it at all," Harry said with a frown, which lead him to believe all the more the teachers were in on whatever was going on with his friend.

"Oh I bet she loved that one," Lily muttered, kind of thinking Ron might be onto something with that one.

"Why would she know that if she missed the class!" Remus asked in exasperation, thinking their teacher wasn't likely to scold Hermione for this and then rub that kind of thing in.

"I'm impressed he's paid attention to know that," James rolled his eyes.

"A very real threat," Sirius nodded, thinking back to her first lesson and appearing out of nowhere, and how she wasn't likely to change that game with time.

"Could have had some fun with that though," Remus said tragically, clearly thinking Harry had wasted a golden opportunity.

"Called it!" Sirius cried with glee.

"She set's the exam," Lily rolled her eyes, finding this teacher just as annoying as ever.

Lily actually laughed hardest of all, pleased Hermione was still keeping this class in check, and ignoring Sirius' smug look that she'd mimicked someone again.

"Can't imagine she didn't," James snickered.

"Considering she basically just told them to nod off, yeah," Remus nodded while trying, and failing, to cover his own mirth.

"Wonder if you get extra credit for claiming to see Neville break something," Lily snarked, "that seems to be her preference."

"I am positive you are not the only one," James nodded.

"Can't imagine why that would be distracting," Remus smirked.

"Least that's got to be one of the easiest classes in the world," Sirius chuckled, "even if she comes over, you can fake it you've seen anything."

"That's exactly the kind of observation she was looking for," Lily giggled.

All five of them cracked up laughing at Ron's prediction.

"Glad to see Hermione's getting her kicks in as well," Sirius nodded with glee.

"Feel almost sorry for those girls," Lily rolled her eyes.

"I don't even need to ask," James rolled his eyes, "but let me guess, the Grim's coming for Harry again?"

"You could be a psychic yourself," Remus nodded seriously before they all cracked up laughing again.

"Looks like we're not the only ones getting sick of this," Lily quipped, between the laughter still escaping.

"Kind of half curious what they said," Sirius wondered.

"Probably something along the lines of, how dare she talk back to the all-knowing Trelawney," Harry rolled his eyes.

"Well it's not as if Trelawney didn't deserve it," Remus scoffed. "You can only use the same thing so many times before it gets old."

"You'd know all about that," James nodded with a smirk still in place.

"Ouch," Sirius winced, fairly sure that this was probably an insult on the Seer level.

Harry puffed up with indignation as he snapped, "Hermione's the least mundane person I know. I'd like to see how Trelawney handles a Polyjuice Potion! Let alone-"

Lily leaned over and gave her son a comforting pat on the shoulder as she said, "we know dear, that was extremely wrong of a teacher to say. Best not rile yourself up over it though, after the day she's been having I'd like to see what she says."

Harry nodded and backed down, still looking indigent over it.

"Err," James began in shock, having expected maybe a snappy retort, not, was she packing up?

"Sh-she's quitting!" Remus spluttered in shock.

"Of all the reactions, that was the last one I'd seen coming," Lily agreed, eyes nearly falling out of her head in shock.

"I don't think it's quitting, so much as she's finally had enough," James disagreed with a curious look in place. "I'm honestly quite sure that Harry and Ron are going to get up and join her. There is a difference between giving up and walking away."

"Your moments of maturity still take me back," Lily told him fondly, giving her wedding ring a twist.

James tried to look offended but was too busy winking at his wife at the crack.

"You two didn't go with her!" Remus yelped in shock.

"By the time the shock wore off, we knew if we'd tried to go Trelawney may well have told us to sit back down," Harry grimaced, for some odd reason getting the feeling he may be lucky for his stay, though not for long.

Sirius blinked once, twice, then released a bark like laughter that his friends had missed hearing so much they couldn't help sharing a smile even as he taunted in their faces, "I told you, didn't I! This woman's personality aside, she's absolutely a real Seer!"

That brought the three nonbelievers up short, pondering this. The first they would have argued the point, circumstances and a lucky break, but three? Claiming the Grim, Sirius' animagus form, to be dogging Harry, then Lavender's little rabbit on that exact date, now this?

They couldn't help it, whereas before they had all scoffed at the idea of a Seer, now they really did believe that Dumbledore had found one. It was a moot point in all, they still didn't like her, so they just let it go for now.

"Now that's just rubbing it in," Lily sniffed.

"Besides, I highly doubt it works exactly like that," Remus rolled his eyes. "She may have gotten a feeling a student would leave, not these exact circumstances."

"Don't know," Harry shrugged, "I've no idea how it all really works. Don't rightly think I care either," he added with a grin.

"Oh yes and the poor dear's just bearing that like a champ," Sirius rolled his eyes.

"Oh Harry," Lily sighed. This was the exact reason she detested this teacher, her son didn't need any more worry, especially not from something like a spectral dog haunting him.

"She may well be seeing me wandering around the grounds though," Sirius couldn't help but point out with a bad attempt at sounding casual.

"I'd rather you just never have another near fatal accident again," James grumbled.

"And it only gets worse," Remus sighed.

"You said that last year," Harry grumbled at the remembered headaches all that studying had caused.

"And he's going to say that every year, because it's going to be true every year," James agreed.

"That's a kind outburst to some I've heard," Lily nodded in agreement.

"How has she not collapsed from stress yet," Remus yelped in shock, knowing the comparison to him was never a good sign. Harry was rather disturbed to see that it was now more real than ever, because even now that he understood it, Remus had continued to grow paler and despite the night's clear rest, looked like he'd been sleep deprived for a week. He seemed used to it though, going back and beginning to bounce his leg to baby Harry's amusement.

"Let's hope this one goes mildly better," Sirius sighed without any real hope.

"Aww," Lily couldn't help but coo sadly, admiring this boy beyond belief at his continued fighting for his friends pet.

"Now that's a real testament to the situation," James said in appreciation.

Sirius' eyes alighted with a whole new excitement. There was no way something could happen to cut this chapter off in less than a week! Could he have possibly gotten his wish, and gotten his Quidditch due? The best one of all!?

Lily couldn't help but sigh with distaste, remembering the last game where all that pressure had been placed on her son. The look of determination on her son's face was not boding well for this one.

"Can't blame you," Remus laughed. "I was about to yell at Sirius to shut it as well."

"Something that deeply haunted me during the night," Sirius said tragically, ignoring the fact that he hardly looked like he'd gotten any sleep either.

"Somehow I find that hard to believe," Lily muttered.

"I get the feeling it's only going to get worse," Remus chuckled.

"Nope, he deserved every second of that," James said with glee.

"As should be," Sirius nodded.

Lily couldn't help but think for the millionth time this is one of the many reasons she didn't think much of this sport. Wouldn't it be better if they simply had four teams, made up of different house members on each? That way they could still have the competition, but it wouldn't put so much pressure on the house as a whole. The teams didn't really need to win points for their house, that was to be taken care of in the classrooms. She didn't really think she could convince anyone else of these facts though.

"Now how did that work out?" Lily asked in amazement. "Did the spell backfire and hit both of them?"

"I heard about it from the twins," Harry said with a light laugh, "and apparently a second Gryffindor had jumped in and accidentally hit both, but she was never caught."

"Could they get any more childish," Remus scoffed.

"Better than leeks coming out of his ear," Sirius sniggered.

"Were they really going to jump him?" James asked in disgust, finding it fortunate his son had such loyal friends that they wouldn't let this happen.

"Sounds like it was sound advice," Lily grumbled, temper and worry beginning to war against each other at her son being such a target.

"A valid fear," Sirius nodded seriously. "Can't risk someone getting the chance to tamper with that."

Sirius read that with such conviction that Lily almost wanted to laugh again, but couldn't bring herself to do it at the determined look on her sons face.

Remus pretended to faint in shock, causing the child in his lap to start giggling all the more.

"Nice to see she really does care," Harry grinned.

"Wasn't actually aware that was possible," James began with a smirk.

"But I can see where they're coming from," Sirius finished as that had been his and James go to for stress relief as well.

"That boy really worries me sometimes," Lily muttered, thinking he was going to stress himself right into the game and that couldn't be a good thing. He clearly needed an outlet. Which she found ironic as sports usually were supposed to be the outlet.

"I think for once I'd recommend against eating if you're already close to that," Remus said with mild concern, like Lily starting to fear about stress bombarding Harry.

"Well gee thanks," Sirius huffed, unable to really show his joking annoyance because he was practically bouncing in place from finally getting his own Quidditch chapter! James understood that, and would have been annoyed any other day except it was just too good to see him in such bright spirits, and fearing it wouldn't last long kept his complaints to himself.

"Because that'll fix everything," James laughed, sounding like he truly meant it.

"An early turn in really was best," Harry nodded, getting the feeling he wasn't going to have a pleasant night's sleep.

Lily couldn't help but sigh, but didn't say anything as she knew that despite his previous ill givings with the game, she still wouldn't have won the fight that her son didn't need this game in his life.

"Now that's a nightmare," Remus nodded, trying to muffle some more laughter at the thought.

"No," Sirius shivered in disgust, "that is."

"Your dreams just get more and more vivid," James couldn't help but grin some more at the shocked look on his son's face.

"Least you remembered that," Remus laughed outright this time.

"Might have been more interesting if they had though," James muttered for his own amusement, knowing Sirius would never agree and not wanting to break his happy stride.

At this point they didn't think it was possible for Sirius to sound more excited. This had been all he'd wanted out of these whole books, hearing about Harry's fantastic Quidditch games and making friends and just being a normal kid. If he only got one good chapter of this whole book, he couldn't have put into words his gratefulness that it had been this one!

This didn't really surprise anyone, it wasn't uncommon for an abundance of things to be lurking around after dark. It actually managed to infect Sirius' tone with a nostalgic light now, as it brought back memories of doing this himself.

Sirius couldn't help but give a hard flinch, but it didn't stem him one little bit. Harry's shock at seeing him around would be all the better, as it could only mean that whatever was keeping him around school hadn't changed and it meant he'd get a more proper opportunity to see Harry's game in person then!

Well that was, actually kind of odd. Wouldn't Hermione lock up her pet, at least when she went to bed? If not, then they found that vaguely irresponsible of her, as anything in that forest could eat her cat, and that wouldn't be pleasant.

"Is it mating season?" Sirius couldn't help but ask with all the sarcasm he could, refusing to let his mood go anywhere but up no matter what Harry's feelings of either of his personas at the time were.

The others couldn't have looked more surprised with this then if Sirius had claimed he was a cat lover now. Sure he didn't mind the animals, but this was just plain weird as he'd never gone out of his way to interact with them before.

Then Remus winced as he wondered if his friend wasn't just lonely. If this was a regular thing and Hermione always let Crookshanks out at nights, maybe Sirius had befriended the animal out of boredom. That black feeling was rising back up in him, making him question all over again that he'd never once been caught being around the dog, and he refused to linger on this anymore then Sirius, just begging for one hour of peace so he made the crack, "naw, Padfoot, are you making sure Hermione's cat gets home safe?"

Sirius scoffed and smiled weakly, letting his own confusion at this random thing slide away.

"Well we already knew it wasn't that," Lily said lightly, causing at least Harry to laugh at his old self.

"Kind of the opposite if you really think about it," James nodded fervently, still not having a shadow of a doubt Sirius could only be a good thing in Harry's life, the protector he so sorely needed.

While it was still an odd thing all in all, the three boys dearly hoped this wouldn't detract Harry from his Quidditch thoughts. So Sirius was hanging around with a cat, it wasn't the strangest thing they'd heard this year.

Well except Lily, who would honestly rather hear Harry had gone down and finally confronted that dog then hear another Quidditch game.

Sirius couldn't help but release a surprised snort, effectively erasing the little tension that had built up in the room.

"School unity," James said smugly, trying to catch Lily's attention as well, which worked too well when she glared at him instead of the book.

"Hope he's sweating his arse off," Remus nodded.

"Ooh, my little Prongslet's first crush," James cooed fondly, making Harry repeat that blush now.

"Actually the twins may have just done that for some last minute attention," Remus offered, clearly without meaning it as they wouldn't jeopardize anyone in the team anymore then Harry or Wood.

"I kind of wanted to hear if he'd made a better speech than last time," James said without any real disappointment, bouncing so hard he was shaking the whole couch in anticipation for this! It had taken over two books to finally get to a Quidditch final!

"I would honestly be insulted by that if two of his friends weren't on the team," Sirius said with a false tragic face.

"I'll let it slide this once," James nodded in agreement, with his son being on the team and all.

Lily still couldn't help the eye roll she gave for that, thinking that the commentator shouldn't be allowed to be from their own house on biased opinions.

James hardly looked like he wanted to defend Harry's opposition, but the need to defend his sport won out and he said, "only the Seeker's actually expected to be small, and even then it's not a requirement. Like that last game with Diggory," he only briefly ignored the wince the memory of that game caused, "his size over you came in handy."

"Maybe now wasn't the best time to bring up Harry's first loss Prongs," Sirius quietly reprimanded while giving him a light tap with the book, and James realized Harry had turned a little green himself and quickly apologized, considering putting a muting jinx on himself to shut himself up and hear Harry's win!

"Honestly would not be surprised," Remus nodded solemnly.

Sirius had hardly ever sounded happier in his life right then, he'd take the whole punishment of yesterday just to have this one beautiful moment of this perfect game.

"Anyone else get the feeling he just guesses which twin that is," James muttered to himself, his ears starting to ring he was listening so hard, and clearly not noticing by the smile frozen on his face.

Despite her own love loss at the game, even Lily couldn't deny her want to see her house team getting a win with Harry being it's victor, but she asked for the sake of keeping these rowdy boys in check, "who fetches the Quaffle from the ground after the score? Plus, how does Madam Hooch reinsert it into the game."

Harry was bouncing around with a stupid smile on his face as he answered, "it's got a charm on it, so it sinks really slowly to the ground, like falling through water. The Keeper who just got scored on puts it back in by throwing it to the closest Chaser, and the game resumes."**

Sirius couldn't have looked prouder if he tried, remembering back to Harry's first year and how he'd never even heard of the sport, and now he was taking up the proper knowledge and passing it along to his own mother.

"Foul!" All four boys snapped at once, the baby in Remus' lap making an odd screeching noise like he was trying to mimic that, causing the lot of them to laugh all over again.

"Yeouch," Sirius winced, remembering earlier how he had randomly thought one of the Weasley twins had a crush on this Chaser, and that would explain quite the retaliation.

"Foul," Lily said pointedly, grinning at the boys when they just gave her amused looks for her added comment.

"Even pissed he's got his manners," Remus couldn't help but laugh.

"Why wouldn't Angelina have been the one to do it?" Lily asked in mild concern, wondering how hard the girl had been hit.

"Wood picks who takes the shot, so in that instance he probably thought Alicia was better," Harry explained eagerly, "plus, not as emotional as she wasn't the one to get hit."

Lily dearly wanted to interrupt again to ask why hasn't someone called time out so that could be fixed, but then she reminded herself that was the Captain's job, and holding such title Flint must have decided he didn't need it. It was his own fault then what came of this.

That gave them all a whoop of joy, putting all of the boys in such a good mood they couldn't find it in themselves to pick on Lily who had joined in.

No one even had to hear the description of Lee's cut off commentary, the word foul already tracing their tongues.

James made an odd noise between a hiss of disgust and trying to said the word, leaving him red in the face and unable to say it as Sirius read on loudly anyways so Gryffindor could get another due penalty shot.

"Yes!" Was hollard loudly in the room, the euphoric mood coursing through such an opposite to that of yesterday it hardly felt like the same living room.

"Personally I don't see how she could get to much heat into her words," Remus cackled, "since she probably agreed with him."

"Bloody hell you get better with every game," James praised. "That had to be less than fifteen minutes in."

"Considering he could never spot it on his own," Sirius nodded eagerly, adoring his godson for this little fake out.

Lily couldn't help a wince at each one, remembering that horrid game last year with the mad bludger out to kill her son, but he hadn't even flinched at remembered pain this time, so she didn't say anything and the boy's didn't look the least bit concerned since Harry clearly had the speed to avoid this.

Harry may not have reacted in pain at the reminder now because it had hardly hurt, and knew adrenaline had stopped him from even feeling that then.

The five of them each said something very foul indeed, but Sirius wouldn't linger on verbal abuse a second longer then he had to as he blasted on, his hands nearly shaking with excitement for the rush of the sport.

Sirius couldn't help but release a mad cackle as he lovingly replayed that image over and over in his mind's eye.

"If that doesn't have one, then you should have the right to name that maneuver," Remus told Harry fondly a crazy grin plastered across his own face.

"Least she didn't listen," James nodded seriously, thinking that would only earn Slytherin another foul shot.

This room didn't sound much better, though the hilarious mental image of McGonagall and Lee fighting over the megaphone didn't really cause any amounts of anger.

"The final's always are the worst," Remus nodded in agreement.

"And I hope they pay dearly for every bit of it," Lily hissed, not even bothering to look embarrassed for her outburst anymore.

"Could he be anymore idiotic," James howled in frustration at this low move.

"He deserved that cobbing," Sirius nodded with a quick nash of teeth before he continued in still hysterically happy tones.

For the first time it seemed Lily appreciated her son's position as staying out of the mayhem she was hearing about, at least he was only in danger when he put himself into the furrows of the game.

"Foul!" All five of them cried in an outrage at that blatant move, dearly hoping the Keeper had good enough reflexes to duck.

Lily couldn't help but wiggle in her seat with worry, while the boys looked ready to jump on their own brooms and retaliate for that nonsense!

"Yes, yes, yes," Remus was doing a little chant under his breath, giving the baby a light bounce with every one as he realized Harry could now end this game with their win!

James was rubbing his own throat and not looking the least bit like he regretted it, he was enjoying himself too much.

Now everyone who wasn't reading had joined in on Remus' chant.

The slightest of growls began forming in Sirius' throat, hating that his first thought was to flash back to Harry's first game and his tampered broom, but refusing to linger on it in the high of his own enjoyment and just hoping it was his pup's adrenaline rush making the world come to a crawl.

"That's Blagging!" James howled in outrage, looking like he was going to raise a whistle and scream that foul to the heavens if Sirius didn't do it in the seconds coming.

"A pity that, he deserves it all over again," Remus snarled.

"Can't catch it himself so he's got to make the game drag on forever," Sirius said solemnly, before blasting on with ever growing eagerness to see that slimy little snake lose.

Lily wasn't bothering to repress her laughter one bit, knowing full well she'd just been thinking the same things in her own mind when she heard of that bit.

None of them had believed it possible, but the laughter in the room actually grew tenfold with the mention of their normally stoic head of house so blatantly getting into the game herself! It was by far the best visual images Harry had yet to capture.

"No, no, no," James ground out, about ready to jump to his feet and start running around the room he was getting so emotional over this, slightly ruining the effect of his words "they're getting emotional, they'll start losing traction."

"That was not what was intended!" Lily spluttered, curling some lose hair around her fingers and pulling in agitation at her own built up response to all this.

Sirius couldn't help throwing in what he felt about that in between his own commentary, but clearly no one was going to stop him anytime soon, so he kept reading.

"NOT going to happen," Remus was wriggling around so much that the baby hadn't stopped laughing for several minutes now.

"I've never even seen that," James yelped in outrage. "How could they all be so dense as to think that tactic would have any use!" The old Quidditch Captain was so tossed that a team could think this useful he nearly missed Sirius reading,

but he laughed loudly along with everyone else as he pictured them all flying away from Harry like startled bugs.

"Oh bloody hell!" Lily moaned, coming to the same realization as everyone else, that may well have been planned to distract Harry while Malfoy took the lead he would need to catch the Snitch.

"Come on, come on," was the insane chant being pelted around, all with twisted fingers and high hopes that Harry's broom would surely outstrip anything given the space needed!

The echo of the cry of triumph actually managed to shake the windows with their excitement! Harry had done it, he'd finally won his house the Quidditch Cup! None of them could have been any prouder in that moment each giving him a huge hug and making Harry laugh so hard he couldn't have protested if he'd wanted to. This time Lily couldn't begrudge them one tiny bit as they all laughingly demanded a recount of the game with all the insane amount of details Harry could offer, they clearly just didn't want this moment to end.

They possibly could have gotten through a whole other chapter by the time they all settled back down and even then Sirius didn't look like he wanted to keep going. He wanted to linger on this feeling for the next four books, but he also knew better and was forced to finally admit that they had to get to the bottom of Sirius' behaviour before this day ended as well or he may well go mad now from not knowing, so unbelievably to anyone else it was him who finally managed to convince them all to get back to it and finish what little was left of this perfect chapter!

"Pretty sure you just made the whole of his years at school in that one moment," James nodded.

"Wish he'd show that a little more often," Lily beamed, hoping in this moment he'd finally make a real connection with his brothers he was so clearly missing.

Remus couldn't help making an odd spluttering noise, half shocked and half trying to laugh at this mental image of his old head of house.

That one lone little comment was enough to make all of them swivel back to one person in particular who hadn't been mentioned in all of that, but perhaps Remus had just been lost in the crowd? Considering he'd attended the last game, that must be true...right?

Sirius still refused to linger on it, laughing away like a loon at the happy bubble he refused to be allowed to pop while making a crack that Remus had no choice but to laugh at, making Harry's smile as wide as theirs as he took the book.

* * *

This is the last nice chapter in the book, so I hope you guys enjoyed it.

*If you want to look up the full story that Sirius' drunk mind won't ever actually remember just google that name.

**I think that's how it works in basketball, and despite having my own copy of Quidditch Through the Ages all I could find on this was the mention of the ball sinking slowly to the ground, not who puts it back in the game, so please correct me if anyone knows better.


	16. PROFESSOR TRELAWNEY'S PREDICTION

Harry was in such a giddy mood after the last chapter that it took him a little longer than usual to settle down and try to read, putting all of his delays on this one feeling, and refusing to admit that now that school was coming to an end, he knew he should remember something that he'd been ignoring all year.

"Can't believe it didn't last for months," James beamed, still unable to knock the pride out of his voice, not that he was trying.

"But of course that's the time exams are set," Sirius muttered in disgust.

"You're starting to give me flashbacks," Remus sighed, rubbing his forehead in that remembered pain.

James spazzed and then pretended to faint in shock, while Sirius 'broke down' crying about how he was so disappointed in them.

Lily and Harry couldn't help giggling along at the pair of them, while Remus looked about ready to join in except he couldn't do anything to theatrical with the baby in his lap.

"Alright, I'll give them a pass for that," James nodded, coming out of it.

"Yes fine, just this once," Sirius nodded in agreement as he wiped his eyes.

"Really wish that was a joking title," Lily muttered in remembered disdain of how accurate it was.

"Whelp, there goes that good mood of his, that he had for five seconds," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Oh bloody hell," James winced, remembering all over again the amount of tests that girl had to cope with.

"Still don't comprehend how you could give up on that," Sirius asked, knowing he'd pester the girl to no end until he got his answer.

"Don't I know it," Remus sighed, Sirius having pestered him to no end when he realized he'd been hiding something, and not having let up until he figured it out.

Lily went cross-eyed at the thought of one exam in the morning and one that evening, let alone double it!

"Well can you blame her?" Harry asked with a bit of an edge, remembering those moments a little too well.

"Right," Sirius said with a frown, drawing out the word past its normal syllable count. He wasn't questioning that part any more than before, just how she was bleeding doing it.

"That's when you ask again," James pointed out.

"And again," Sirius seconded.

"Until she's told you after the millionth time you ask," James concluded.

"Trust them on this," Remus said with a suffering sigh, "they have way too much experience on that front."

"It's good he's branching out into subjects he isn't taking," Lily muttered, thinking he was quite brave to poke fun at her at a time like this.

They all perked up again, though without much hope. They all knew what was coming, as nothing had changed.

"Guess that's kind of a good thing, you might could sneak out and see him," James muttered without any enthusiasm, knowing if they could they would have done it already.

"Ugh," Lily muttered in disdain, thinking that wasn't any kind of professional at all.

"Why, would Hagrid know that?" Remus asked, going just that little bit paler from shock at this blatant disregard of Hagrid's rights for his appeal.

"Maybe he does have a friend at the Ministry that warned him," Sirius said listlessly, the reason didn't matter, it still made him see red with anger.

"But, but that means," Lily tried to splutter, but she was so angry she couldn't get the words out. None of them needed her to, they all knew what this meant. The Ministry had set its mind, and that appeal had just turned into a literal execution, making it all the more ghastly that this was being done in Hagrid's house!

"You tell them that when they arrive," James nodded seriously, knowing this wouldn't be the only things he'd like to say to every one of those pompous, arrogant, gah he was so angry he was running out of insults in his own head!

"Sounds about right yeah," Sirius hissed, his hand starting to twitch like he wanted to curse Malfoy into oblivion right then. If Malfoy could get away with doing these types of things, what else did he have running for him at that Ministry!?

"Wish he'd stay that way forever," Remus snarled.

"How, could, he, be, pleased, with, this!" Lily said slowly and carefully to stop herself from screaming at the top of her lungs, not with her infant still in the room anyways. It just blew her mind that he hadn't learned a damned thing, even after his cruel acts to Harry all year and her son had still won fairly, even after Hermione had taught him right how words could hurt and he'd gone right back to it! What would it take to make this boy see this wasn't okay?

"I cannot begin to say just how wrong that is." James scowled, hoping against hope something could still be done, anything that would get this animal out of this putrid situation he didn't belong in. All this for a couple of scratches on his arm, when Malfoy had deserved that in the first place!

"You have much more restraint than any of us," Remus nodded seriously.

"It vaguely helped he would most often do this with Snape around," Harry said morosely, his face making it clear that probably might not stop him again the next time he saw him.

"You just going to leave that down there forever then?" James sighed, randomly wondering if the twins had come across it and perhaps taken it or anyone really, they couldn't be the only kids to know about it.

Harry did look like he was regretting this decision as well, he'd just been so upset and paranoid about being caught around that statue so many times that if anyone, Snape or at the time Lupin, caught him there again, he might lose something far more valuable to him then that Map, he couldn't have stood it if someone took his cloak away next. He still might have risked it though just to see Hagrid, but there was also the matter that he had no way of getting out of the castle with all of those securities, so it was a moot point in the end. Once he explained this to the others, they looked like they understood more, though as unhappy about it as Harry. Remus especially, though Harry had left his name out, Remus guessed it all the same.

James couldn't help but perk up just a bit, wanting to know how his son had done in his old favorite class.

"It didn't say what you did," James said swiftly.

Harry grimaced as he muttered, "mine had been the one to blow steam."

"Well that's not so bad," Sirius said bracingly, "if it had just waited another few seconds, no one would have even known and you'd have gotten full marks."

Harry gave him a friendly smile for the attempt, but his thoughts had been much like his fathers, and he'd been hoping that by now with his magic he may have gotten some sort of hint at what he might be best in. It certainly wasn't his father's old branch, which wasn't improving his mood.

Lily couldn't help a giggle herself, saying, "honestly I can't see you getting too bad off for that, at least you've shown you can do it."

Harry gave the expected laugh back, though still right on being annoyed that it clearly wasn't his mother's either. Despite how often they kept saying how much he was like them, he was still looking for some sort of connection to them back then even through these feeble means rather than possessions they'd once owned or even people. He had vividly remembered Ollivanders words about their strengths in magic, and the longer he didn't excel in one of these two the more it annoyed him.

"Well that one should be easy enough," Remus said lightly, noting like the others Harry's bad mood, but unclear why it was there. Since he wasn't saying it they assumed it had something to do with his memories, so he was still trying to keep things light as he finished, "all you did was study flobberworms all year, plus that one class where the fire salamanders came."

Harry nodded in agreement, forcing himself to shake away his problem which was probably just a stupid want, and focus on the here and now, where he could make plenty of connections to his parents.

"Guess you can't rightly blame him," Sirius said in honest sympathy.

"Easiest exam ever!" Remus said with just a touch of envy, they'd never gotten off so easy in that class with Kettleburn, though upon reflection that may have been a good thing.

"See, you did learn something in that class," James pointed out with chipper.

"That'll happen with any animal," Remus nodded sadly.

"Can't even rightly blame you," Lily sighed. Harry couldn't help feeling disappointed in himself all over again, knowing that was his Mum's favorite subject now and wishing he could be better in it, not much he could do though with the teacher he had.

"Does Snape make all of his exams an unintended joke?" Sirius couldn't help but demand, slightly amused as he remembered Harry's first year and his Forgetfulness Potion qualification.

"It's a bleeding miracle Harry hasn't failed every year with that kind of biased," James growled.

"Always a good strategy," Lily nodded, "do the most with what you can, bullshit your way through what you don't."

Harry couldn't help a startled laugh, finding it more amusing as time went on his Mum was clearly relaxing and not being so uptight.

"I wish they'd serve ice-cream with every exam," Sirius sighed, "it would certainly make me more willing to show up."

That caused mixed emotions in all of them. They all still couldn't help but perk up whenever Remus was mentioned, he was clearly doing such a good job with the class and he had gone out of his way to take an interest in Harry's dementor problem. Then of course that lead to his more odd behaviors, and it left them confused all over again what on earth had happened to him this whole time. Had growing up alone and away from his friends really changed him that much? Twelve years was a long time, and none of them really felt like they had a right to judge if he had.

Remus was the only one who didn't agree with that last assessment, thinking that all the time in the world shouldn't have changed how he felt about Harry, wouldn't have done anything for his conviction of protecting and helping Sirius, but as they still had no new information on it, no one really said anything.

"You always did come up with the best ways to make that class fun," Harry told him fondly, his conviction that Professor Lupin was his favorite DADA teacher he ever had still holding true no matter what he learned of his personality on the side.

Remus offered him a wane smile for the compliment, before morosely turning back to the baby and half hoping he'd fade back out again soon, while still somehow trying to hold onto the flicker of hope that his future actions would properly be explained.

"Least I aced that one," Harry beamed, remembering his annoyance at his Potions, Charms, and Transfiguration grades again. So he hadn't blossomed in his parents best subjects, but he had in another. Their obvious praise at him now, as he'd clearly done that without Remus having given him any extra help, made them as proud as anything.

"He got out alright though," he said unnecessarily, since Remus had still been around and had to get him out before he finished, "and he fought off the boggart just fine, so he still got really good marks."

Lily remembered back to when the boggart had first come up, and the girl's ire that she hadn't had a go. Lily had laughed then because this student didn't seem to need such practice.

Then she blanched in shock along with everyone else at that reaction.

They couldn't help it, all of the boys cracked up laughing. Lily tried to scowl at them, but then she remembered Ron's joke that this would actually be her boggart, and she couldn't help a light giggle of her own at how right he'd been. It still wasn't right to tease her, since she was stressed beyond all reason this year, but the fact that she really thought this still was laughable. Even with the extra workload, they'd still been under the impression she was top of her class in now literally every class.

"Don't blame him," Sirius couldn't help but snicker one last time.

"What's he doing there?" James grumbled, his despise of the Ministry nearly having reached the same level as Sirius'. First what had been done to his best mate, his brother, and now everything with Hagrid had put the justice system he'd been hoping to join at an all-time low.

"Guess I can't blame them," Remus said with a wince, his own thoughts at the Minister being on the school grounds giving him his own spike of fear. He remembered back chapters ago about his worry of what he was getting let out, and possible retribution for his being around children. Would it reach all the way to the Minister of Magic, and Harry just hadn't heard about it because it had been handled quietly? He tried to keep himself calm by making a face at the baby, which worked effectively in making them both laugh, the others wondering why Remus' sounded so strained all of a sudden.

They may have already worked this out, but it didn't lessen their hatred of the situation any.

Sirius looked disgusted as he leaned back into the seat, grumbling, "I'm not even surprised at this point, bet they were all paid off to just skip that appeal."

Harry didn't want to believe it, but couldn't think of anything to argue the point either. No one even wanted to ask what the Minister was supposedly doing dealing with this low level type thing, the answer wouldn't make the act any better.

And that didn't make anyone feel any better either.

"Confused as to why anyone would question him," James said through clenched teeth, "or confused at how his own system is working!"

"I honestly want to cry at how sincere he's being," Lily ground out, looking the opposite of tears she was so frustrated by this wrongdoing.

"Merlin could they be any crueler about this!" Lily howled in outrage. Showing up to Hagrid's front door with that! At this point she wouldn't even be surprised if they didn't do this the humane way, and just simply lopped off the creature's head while Hagrid was watching and then walk away like that was okay!

"Can't believe the Minister himself is there, they're so blatantly-" James had to click his jaw shut to stop his own voice from rising in pure frustration of this continued mess.

"Please tell me Hermione isn't really going to stick up for this," Sirius asked with something remarkably close to hatred.

"No," Harry snapped back at once, "she'll tell in a second, but she'd never after all she did to try and stop it."

Sirius backed down at once, he'd still been unable to stop himself from drawing a lot of parallels to that hippogriffs situation and what he was envisioning as his own, but now when he replayed that, it had been crueler than he meant.

What really bothered him was that Harry kept watching him with a frown in place, and Sirius wasn't really sure why. Harry had been looking at him a lot like that through the whole book, it was that same plagued face that meant he really wanted to remember something. The fact that Sirius still feared for his own futures sanity and Harry couldn't answer that wasn't helping anything.

"Well, damn," Lily finally got out after chewing on that for a moment, "guess she's got a point."

"Guess it wouldn't have been worth it," James agreed with a suffering sigh.

Harry's tone as he read that made it clear that Hermione hadn't meant that any more than they did.

"Why does this crap keep happening to you at the worst of times?" Remus grumbled to no one.

"Least this should be another cakewalk," Sirius offered, anything to keep Harry from shooting him looks. Was it just him, or were those going up in frequency every time Buckbeak was mentioned?

"What are they even studying?" Lily asked in wonder. "All we've heard in that class is make it up as you go along."

Harry just shrugged, he'd tried his hardest not to take that class seriously after his first lesson, it hadn't always worked, but he didn't think that was going to change.

"Think I found a fly trapped in there once," Harry muttered without any enthusiasm, his skin starting to itch all over. Something, it was definitely that feeling rising up in him again. Something was about to happen...

"If she's going in alphabetic order, the boys might not even make it down there in time even if they were going to sneak," James moaned, thinking Trelawney was probably going to take forever.

"Oh for the love of," Lily huffed, more than at her wits end between the fate of Buckbeak and now this teacher on top of it was putting her in quite the foul mood. Now she was still picking on Neville on top of everything!

"Starting to?" Remus rolled his eyes, even with the proof that he did know she was a Seer, she still annoyed him to no end, and didn't really think she should be indulged.

"Least it's going faster than I thought," James muttered, Harry and Ron's actions clearly meant that this time they may really go for it and be with Hagrid right then, which was surely needed.

"Don't," Sirius told Lily, taking great pleasure in cutting her off for once. "Leave the kid be."

She huffed but held her tongue, to his surprise.

They noticed that obviously this wasn't in any order, so they kind of wondered how she was picking, but it didn't really matter, she could have just been doing it randomly to keep them on their toes.

"Why do I get a bad feeling about leaving him for last?" Lily sighed, thinking Harry may well spend an entire hour now trying to be convinced there was some death dog after him.

"Well clearly you need some help from Lavender," Sirius smirked, now he clearly wasn't the only one watching Harry, whom the longer he read the more strained his voice was getting.

Harry couldn't help it though, he just knew something was about to happen, and it was making his headache like no other.

"Well Ron had the right idea," James sighed, "I'm pretty sure all you've got to do is make something up on the spot and you might get away with it."

"Still can't believe you didn't drop when you had the chance," Lily muttered.

"I think I'd be a little more worried if it did," Remus said honestly with a twitch of his lips, then frowned when Harry hardly reacted. He hadn't been this stressed in a while now, so for him to be acting like this meant something really big was about to happen...in Trelawney's room...

"Thought she said he could take his time," Lily rolled her eyes.

Sirius couldn't help a little gag, what a horrid thing to ask him! They'd all said all they could on this matter though, so it really wouldn't do any good to keep at it now.

"Bloody hell I think she's enjoying herself." James groaned, starting to look a little green from that description, coupled with how much the teacher seemed to be enjoying herself trying to get Harry to picture this gruesome sight.

Harry dearly wished this had been what was bothering him, it certainly gave him a seconds moment of relief which could possibly mean that he was right, but he got about as long to think on it before his headache returned with such a force he could hardly read the words, meaning he hadn't yet gotten to the part that needed saying to make this go away.

"Is, she having a fit or something?" Lily couldn't help but ask with genuine worry, but Harry paid her no mind as the moment had come, and he read in a hurried breath.

The instant relief of pressure Harry finally got as he sighed at that memory being restored to him was ruined the second he heard the noise.

Sirius felt himself blackout for the span of a few seconds before he lunged off of the couch and looked like he was going to sprint out the door. James wasn't giving him a chance, lashing hold of his arm so tight Sirius yelped in pain, but it clearly didn't register as he sobbed, "oh god, oh bloody hell, oh Merlin, what did I do-"

Remus smacked him then, hard. It didn't seem to do anything though, Sirius was shaking so hard he was likely to bite his tongue off, and it wasn't too hard to picture what his eyes might look like in twelve years, they were just slightly tinged with madness now as he stuttered out, "twelve years! Who, who else could that mean, oh please just kill me now, I don't want to know what I did!"

He made such a horrid noise, like an animal slowly dying, as he tried to wrench his arm free and cover his ears, starting to curl in on himself. The one thing he'd ever cared about most in his life, and he had done something to get his family killed! He'd gotten James and Lily killed, he'd caused Peter to die, he'd been the cause of Harry's whole life turning into a raging shit storm every other month, all because he'd done something that he didn't think he could bear finding out about anymore. Whatever it was would never justify what that Seer had just called him. A servant, someone who had clearly made all of this possible!

How long he stayed out of it as his life literally felt like it was crashing in around him he didn't know. So many things he'd been trying to repress since he'd heard his bleeding name in that paper were drowning him all over again, and he didn't even care about how he'd been framed for murdering those people because he clearly deserved that sentence in Azkaban, it didn't matter why he left because he shouldn't have, he deserved every last second of it.

He'd thought it had been himself crying at first, but then something inside of him twitched as a new noise entered. Harry was wailing at the top of his lungs, and that same instinct that had driven him to comfort James and Remus through all of these horrid things they kept hearing about reawoke, drowning out whatever he was feeling and helping him to bottle it up and shove it far away as he looked around in confusion to the howling child who was being uneasily held in the arms of his future self.

That thought would give anyone's head a whirl, but that's what was happening. Harry stood tall and proud as his father, cradling his own infant self with clear unease, but that may have been because he kept throwing fearful looks over in his direction. Harry kept walking towards the stairs and back, like he wanted to leave and get the baby out of the room, but couldn't bring himself to do it because he kept circling back and watching Sirius with wide and fear filled eyes.

It took several thick swallows before the rest of the room came back into focus. James nearly had him smothered into his chest he was hugging him so hard, muttering over and over again that he could never blame him, while clearly trying to talk Remus and Lily out of putting some sort of spell on him that would force him to relax.

Both were shaking so hard it was a miracle they were on their feet, but they were watching him with such wide eyed concern it nearly shamed him as much as the aching hatred for himself had. Here he was, making this all about him, when clearly there were more important things to worry about.

He tried to pull away, but James arms only tightened all the more, so Sirius tried to muffle out, "I can't breathe," whereas in reality he was only really sucking in air because of the reassurance that through all of this, James still couldn't find it in himself to hate him. James had gotten everything he wanted out of life through the girl of his dreams and his baby, and still when it was shoved in his face that Sirius had been the cause of taking it all away his brother had refused to show him anything but insistence that he'd never believe it for a second.

It nearly reduced him to tears all over again, but he was being persistent now as he tried to wiggle free, now more determined than ever to save these lives no matter the cost to him. He'd find out what he'd done and take his punishment happily if it meant saving their lives. He finally got himself free only to meet the darkest of hazel eyes, making it clear Sirius had nearly scared the living daylights out of him, literally, but the moment he was out of those arms Lily had marched over and sat down beside him.

She grabbed his face and made sure he was looking into those ever green eyes as she told him with the utmost conviction, "it's going to be alright. We'll never let that happen to you." Personally she was still a little stunned herself, as she'd never seen him break down before. Sirius had always held himself as a proud man who only let the world see just how good he knew he was. While in the years that she'd fallen for James and gotten to know Sirius more properly as the brother he'd become, she still couldn't ever have believed he was capable of this sever a reaction to something he must know just wasn't possible.

He gave a sullen nod as she released him, gave him a quick kiss on the brow, then scampered over to her son/ sons and did her best to sooth both of them who were equally freaking out, one just more vocally than the other.

Remus flopped down in her empty seat and looked torn between wanting to kill Sirius for giving him a heart attack or hugging him and never letting him go like James had been trying. He settled on all of their fallback, making a joke. "Please give us a warning next time before you go into shock."

Sirius desperately tried for a smile he just didn't feel, because on the inside he was still a shriveled up mess. He may have gotten his emotions under control enough to save face, but he now knew without a shadow of a doubt that dead little part of him wouldn't come back. This was more proof than any he'd ever had before, and still he couldn't do anything about it. Feeling like a lost child, he unfurled himself but couldn't bring himself to lean away from James who still had his shoulder pressed into his. Remus copied that a moment later by leaning into him as well, and though feeling squished, it was pretty much all that was keeping him in place.

Lily and Harry walked properly back in then, Lily cradling her now much more complacent charge. She looked for a moment like she was going to hand him over to his Godfather, but Sirius couldn't help but turn his face away, feeling like he should never have the right to hold that baby again.

Lily would have vehemently disagreed and told him in alphabetical order how stupid that was, but while being squashed like he was he couldn't have carried on the act if he wanted to, so she relented, for now.

Harry looked the most sheepish of all, like he wanted to apologize for this whole mess and go give Sirius a hug himself to reassure him all would be okay, but the words failed him even before he could put them together. The more this carried on, the more he knew this day was the most important of his young life. Something happened on the day of Buckbeak's supposed execution, it involved Trelawney's prediction, and it involved Sirius Black. Whatever it was though would not sit in his mind for any length of time for him to understand how it all fit together, so he was sure if he began to start and try to do anything about it he'd pay dearly and the last thing his family needed was another episode.

Still he hesitated before picking up the book, like he was waiting for permission from someone to say it really was all going to be okay which came from Sirius himself, without any of his usual warmth. "Go on, get it over with."

Harry couldn't help a frown, he still sounded so desolate like at any moment an executioner was going to show up for him, but his friends on either side of him looked so fierce like they'd murder Voldemort himself before they let that happen, Harry didn't argue the point.

Harry really didn't think at this point he could be any more surprised, the harsh reaction from his Godfather because of that mess left him with only an inkling of shock that she clearly had no idea what she'd just done, unless she was faking it, which Harry really doubted.

Lily grimaced, to be perfectly honest when Harry had read out the return of the Dark Lord bit, that had been what she'd been caught on, until her brother began having a panic attack. Now no one even dared to venture what that could mean for their Harry. None of them knew how Seers actually worked, was it possible this was all wrong, or could somehow be stopped?

With Sirius' eyes closed and his head flopped back against the couch like he was still wishing he could start his gravestone, no one was going to linger on it.

Remus felt something twitch in his mouth, like he wanted to make a joke at her expense that she held that kind of restraint, but considering he was far more worried on making sure Sirius kept breathing it just wasn't coming out.

'Oh, of that we've no doubts' James sighed, his mind still flying in every direction possible, and he wasn't going to stop until he landed on the proper meaning for that prediction which did not involve his best friend.

'Could explain why the other students were so freaked out and wouldn't talk' Harry couldn't help but think, trying desperately to put his mind on any more pleasant topic, but the horrible silence that still lingered wasn't leaving a lot of room, and Harry couldn't bring himself to be the one to break it. Plus he knew deep down that wasn't true, or he was sure he wouldn't have reacted so strongly to it.

'Once, just once, can't Harry have some peace in that place' was Sirius' first real coherent thought as he zoned in and out of the story lifelessly, still considering it a viable option to slink out of the house when no one was watching, which didn't seem to be happening any time soon.

'How can something else have happened in the fifteen minutes since the last bomb?' Lily wanted to snap, feeling like her nerves were about to be frayed right out of her body as she cradled her son all the closer.

"Oh," was softly echoed through the room with one glaring left out. It's not like they'd forgotten per say, but Sirius' plight had sort of made it fade back into their mind. Now that it was back in the foreground, they just didn't know what to say. What could they say? What had been done was wrong, and the government doing this wasn't encouraging. It started with the unfair trial of the hippogriff, but the corruption could possibly keep going up until someday someone else got an unfair trial and a beheading because the right bribe was paid off to get rid of a person. Harry hadn't thought it was possible to feel worse, and realized he was wrong as he forced himself to keep going.

"I don't want Hagrid to see it," Lily grumbled softly under her breath, the first real time someone had spoken up making them all give a little start, but the baby seemed to enjoy the voice again as he made a gurgling noise watching his mother's face.

James made sure Harry could see his pride filled smile, knowing he'd do and say the same thing in a heartbeat. Screw the rules, his friend needed support. Since his own friend was acting vaguely comatose, James leaned into his shoulder with a little more pressure.

Harry paused expectantly, never having been more grateful for his choice of words, but there was no comeback. They were all growing more worried the longer this carried on, Remus even reaching over and pressing his hand into Sirius' nose just to make sure air was still coming out.

Sirius did respond by pushing the hand away, but he still wouldn't meet anyone's eyes.

"What were you even going to say?" Lily asked, starting to feel a little jittery. She'd grown so used to the boys interrupting near constantly that the prolonged silence was starting to give her the creeps.

"But you shouldn't be caught there either," Harry responded, his own worry at the situation still at hand. Of course they both knew Remus and James were just at a loss for words, in no mood to be playful, teasing, or anything when their friend was acting the way he was, so until Sirius snapped out of it this could last for a bit.

'Be a little worried if she went to the kitchens' James wanted to mock, though kept his mouth shut and still half hoping Sirius would say that instead.

'She's making sure no one messes with her friends without her doing something about it' Sirius realized, wanting to smile and praise the girl aloud, but the words got lost somewhere on the way out. He was torn between wanting to get the attention off of him, a foreign concept itself, and the beginnings of bubbling warmth that his family really was standing by him even through this foulest of revelations. If the way he could return the favor was getting the mood back to where it should be, then so be it. He now determined he'd have to work this out of himself at the next chance. He tried to sit up more properly but still being sandwiched all he really accomplished was giving the two half cautious looks as they eyed him hopefully for finally giving a real sign of life, but Harry may not have noticed as he'd kept going.

Harry couldn't help a startled little blink, the smallest of feelings inside his gut telling him to pay attention to that, but he was far more focused on ignoring another mounting feeling. It wasn't fair it was happening so soon after the last one, but he never did get to decide when this happened, and as the sun continued sinking down, he was absolutely positive this night was an important one in his life.

"I'll weep the day he does close the door in your face."

Maybe Sirius said that a little too loudly, maybe his voice cracked and he still looked more wretched than he had in his life, but the attempt finally gave all of them the release they'd so sorely needed that the vile escaping the room was nearly visible.

Lily couldn't help her lip trembling a bit like she was fixing to cry for him. It just wasn't right, no matter how many times she said it or thought it she could never say it enough that what was happening to him shouldn't be. Between Hagrid and Sirius her maternal instincts were going haywire in wanting to comfort her friends, but unable to do anything she instead settled on smoothing out her sons hair and never growing tired of the way it stuck right back up.

The others all thought that the strain coloring Harry's voice was because of his stress for Hagrid, which was a part, but they didn't know Harry was forcefully fighting back another memory blast already. How was this possible, happening twice in the span of a few minutes, but he had no control as a tempo began at his temple from the pain of a sharp memory fixing to be returned.

'Macnair was a Death Eater,' that thought trickled through all of the Order members, as they tried their best to keep a roster and suspicions had been going on for ages about him implicated in several deaths. Well that didn't improve anyone's mood, as it only confirmed yet another Death Eater was still out and about in those times, working for the Ministry.

"Aww," Lily coed, she was willing to put her suspicions and annoyances at the headmaster's actions aside momentarily when it came to her son and Sirius just for that moment that Dumbledore truly was trying to be there for his friend like Harry.

Sirius was so sick of hearing that he was yet another cause of problem in his Godson's life, he considered trying to get up and leave again, but since he was basically a sandwich between his two friends who didn't look like they were moving any time soon, he just tallied that up to another thing he could use as his excuse later when he really did leave for good. He was already planning it out in his mind, the moment he got the chance he'd make a break for the door and he'd disappear before he caused this blight of events for his family. They may try to stop him, why he wasn't sure at this point, but he could throw these types of things at them and make a break for it while he was sure they'd be hesitating.

"What?"

That was the most random thing that could have been said right then, that it actually distracted everyone in that moment from anything else. Harry forced himself to keep reading, to confirm Hermione was right, though everything in him told him she was.

Harry made a funny rasping noise of disgust as James lit up with equal amounts of confusion and laughter as he praised, "oh that's great. Can't imagine what on earth happened-"

"Don't," Harry moaned, cutting him off and shocking them as he clutched at his head, tears nearly streaming down his eyes as he pleaded, "don't say that, it's not right."

Lily turned concerned at once, wrapping an arm around him protectively as she asked, "Harry what's the matter?"

Remus couldn't help giving him an odd look mixed with the beginnings of fear for Harry, worried he was dealing with too much having such another painful memory returning so soon, as he asked, "yeah, you should be happy Ron's rat-" but then his own voice failed him, and he started blinking when something clicked. Since the very first time Scabbers had been mentioned, Harry got this odd little act around him about his best friends pet, frowning or something similar though he'd never been properly able to explain why. The description of that particular rat, bloody hell it did match the same one he looked at more than any other rat in his life, and Scabbers had a missing finger, just like...

"Oi, Moony," James was waving his hand in front of his friends face, saying, "yoo-hoo, blanked out on us mate. You figured out Harry's problem. Quite the show that Crookshanks never did, eh?"

Remus had to clear his throat hard for a moment before forcing a goofy smile onto his face, he was being ridiculous of course, it was a coincidence. Which, which he didn't believe in... shaking his head hard he said, "err, right, no sorry, ah, let's keep going."

Lily looked utterly annoyed at that, as she felt they were brushing this pain off a little too lightly, but then she took a good look at Remus' lined features, and how the momentary news had already worn off and Sirius was right back to being lackluster, and she also knew better that Harry couldn't have explained what was really bothering him anyways without suffering for it, so she didn't argue the matter, only increased her hold on her son as he flickered through a few pages as he'd lost his place. He seemed less eager than anyone to go on though, because while that had been the memory return his brain had been warning him about, the pressure still hadn't fully left! What about this day could be causing him more pain from this one afternoon then he'd felt any times previously? Now he knew it had something to do with Scabbers...and Buckbeak, and Trelawney's prediction, and Sirius, but the puzzle pieces refused to fit together, and he had no more of an idea for the ending then anyone.

"That's a very good question," Lily grumbled, finding this more unbelievable the longer she heard about it. Scabbers was alive this whole time! That fight between Ron and Hermione should never have even happened! It was odd though, that the little pet had pulled something like this off, since he was sick and usually was never mentioned anywhere but in Ron's pockets. How had he wound up in Hagrid's of all places?

Remus couldn't help but wince, having heard a few tales about animals looking for somewhere to burrow up to die, had Scabbers just been doing that? His physical description clearly meant he was living towards the end of his life, obviously he was just being paranoid, it was just fate being all the cruller to him that he had tried to see his absent friend in a common garden rat.

They all frowned at that, finding Scabbers bound of energy kind of sad, like maybe he was trying to put up one last fight before his old body gave out. It was rather odd he seemed so insistent in being away from Ron of all people, shouldn't he recognize his owner's voice?

That caused a shiver in all corners of the room, it wasn't too hard to imagine that the poor beast did get a feeling for what was coming for him, as intelligent as he was.

The combination of Hagrid doing his damndest to keep them out of trouble even while his beloved pet was about to be murdered in front of his eyes gave all of them a ball sitting tight in their throat, wanting to argue on the side of the kids and say this couldn't be true, more grateful than ever Harry at least had someone like Hagrid who wouldn't let them stick around to see it.

"You and me both," Lily nodded, bringing her son up to lay up on her shoulder like she was going to burp him, but really just keeping him as close to her as possible. He soon began amusing himself by grabbing hold of her thick red hair instead, and Lily almost enjoyed the momentary distraction of untangling his good grip while forcing herself to keep listening.

This was so random that no one could really think what could be going on anymore. The emotional turmoil of the group felt like they'd been going chapter after chapter about Harry nearly dying all day again, when really they were all just exhausted mentally from hearing about all of these bad things happening around Harry.

Harry didn't really get that out without nearly stuttering himself into silence, closing his eyes hard for a moment and trying to process what he'd just read, while something else in him told him to keep going. Sucking in a deep breath, he looked around to find the others looked just as shocked as he did, the build up to that unfair act having finally been carried through not making it any easier to hear. Unwilling to let himself freeze up now though, Harry finished.

Then he closed the book and put it aside, indicating the chapter was done, but needing a moment before he could keep hearing anything. He wasn't the only one.


	17. CAT, RAT, AND DOG

Now the real fun begins...

* * *

The last thing Remus actually wanted to do at this point was pick up that book and read. Harry's school year was practically over and all they knew about Sirius' circumstances in this future was that his best friend was apparently out of his mind. His actions really were getting hard to describe as anything else, and now because of that prediction, Sirius seemed to have lost all faith in himself. James was still occasionally leaning forward and whispering reassurances whenever Sirius' eyes flickered to the door one to many times. Of course Remus agreed that Sirius would never do anything that had been implied of him, willingly. But whereas James was convinced it had to be another person entirely to blame for all of this, Remus still couldn't help the little niggle saying that maybe Sirius had been involved in this mess, it would at least explain why in his own future he seemed to care so little for the situation. Had Sirius perhaps been tortured, or somehow forced to do those things, and Remus blamed him then?

It was not a comforting thought, but as the cruel silence continued to drag on, he realized that speculation would drive him mad himself, so with a heavy heart and shaking hands he went and found his place to read.

James gave his son a pride filled look, knowing he'd do the same in a second for his friend in pain, well he was technically doing it now as he kept Sirius as comforted as possible until it was shown who'd really done this.

"I've honestly not the faintest idea," Lily muttered scathingly. Even if the Ministry didn't know the full story, even if they had simply acted on orders, the fact that those orders had been carried out in the first place through the rottenest of means would never be okay.

While most of their shock was still on the previous chapter, the random reappearance of Scabbers being alive and acting this way hadn't really dulled any. Why was he acting out of his mind like that? The oddity of this simple animal was much kinder to think on than anything else, so they all paid just a little bit extra attention in hopes one of the kids would find an answer.

"Has he been hanging around this whole time, even back around Hagrid's?" James yelped in shock.

"Forget that," Remus scoffed, his eyes still narrowed in a very odd way, "why on earth is that cat still hunting that rat? In the Gryffindor common room, fine, easy access, but out there on the grounds? Where he's got his fill of rodents, why's his heart still set on this one?" Even then, his mind reasoned, back in the Magical Menagerie when they'd first ever seen Crookshanks, he hadn't gone for the rats on the counter, and most likely never had if they were put up so easily. No, even then, he'd always had an eye for Scabbers...

No one answered him. Maybe they all thought he was being overly paranoid at this point, maybe they thought he was just looking for an easier mystery to solve about animals rather than the other harsh things happening in Harry's life, but when Remus came to a halt in his head and realized the silence he kept going.

"Here I thought something good might keep us going for two sentences," Lily moaned, hating that Ron hadn't got his beloved pet back for five minutes before the rat and cat game began again.

"Really wish he had taught that rat to come," James muttered, still more uneasy than anything that Sirius had yet to really talk again. "Would have made him at least a little more interesting, and helpful right then."

"Are they technically not allowed out on the grounds?" Lily asked, "I thought it was just Harry. It said earlier all the other students were going out."

"Maybe curfew got set back earlier as well," James offered, now realizing that both of his friends were getting suspiciously silent. He knew why Sirius was, but why was it the longer Remus read the more clipped his words were coming out.

He was used to Harry usually not speaking out much unless he had a question, but one glance over and he saw his son wasn't looking much better, he was slowly growing paler and rubbing at his temple all over again. All bad signs another powerful memory was about to return, so soon after the last one. It did bring up the question all over again which he'd never had a chance to voice earlier, why Scabbers return was even such a big deal to his son. He clearly wasn't going to get to ask now though.

That gave everyone a start. What was Sirius doing there now? Had he been hanging around the cat again and finally decided to meet Harry? Why now though, what on earth had changed? Harry looked as confused as anyone, but clearly wasn't giving anyone a second to pause. In fact, if they didn't know any better, the longer this dragged on and Harry got closer to his memory being revealed, did he looked rather angry at something...

"Ouch," they all muttered, going pretty wide eyed at that rather aggressive display. Sirius looked dearly like he was fixing to interrupt just to apologize, while Lily looked like she wanted to snap at Sirius for the same thing, but Remus was still reading in what could definitely be described as a harassed tone now.

"The hell-" James began, thinking there was Sirius playing and goofing off attacking him like he'd done in the past, but that was clearly not what was going on now. Something was very wrong here. Had they been wrong, and this wasn't Sirius at all? What were the odds of that though, that this black dog would be around at the same time as Sirius magically making his reappearance as well?

Sirius had been so paralyzed for so long now that his sudden lung to his feet actually managed to dislodge both of his friends as Sirius made a beeline for the door.

James was still just that little bit faster, fastening his arm around him and holding him back even as an elbow caught his jaw and he felt his teeth click down hard on his tongue, but his hold only tightened as Sirius started swearing at the top of his lungs. Intermittent were the words "-let-me-go!"

"Not going to happen," James ground out, trying to get something else in, but Sirius truly seemed to have finally cracked and lost his mind here as he fought like a madman to be released.

He wasn't crying this time, even the cursing was fading out as he continued to coldly struggle, still hissing out such nonsense like, "really did lose my mind in that place, attacking him!" They had no idea what he thought he was going to accomplish by making a run for it now, but they clearly weren't going to find out as someone else shouted something, and a flash of light had both boys knocked off their feet and collapsing to the ground.

Remus stood over them, wand clutched tightly in his hand as he glowered down at the pair. Keeping it pointed at Sirius he turned on James first and snapped, "would you knock it off, clearly restraining him is only freaking him out more."

Then he turned on Sirius, his heated glare in contrast to the gentle tone he was trying for, "if you ever try to pull a stunt like that again I will bind your arse to the ceiling. Not one of us is going to blame you for something you bleeding haven't done yet. I've never been so sure of anything in my life you have to have a reason for doing this."

"LOOK AT HIM!" Sirius bellowed, getting to his feet in a towering temper as he jabbed his finger at Harry, still shouting, "YOU THINK HE'D BE ACTING LIKE THAT IF-"

He was once again cut off by someone tackling him, but instead of by James, someone who looked remarkably like him. Harry had knocked into him in the ribs, resembling what he'd been told he just did to his own godson, but Harry's arms encircled him in a hug and held on tight enough to break his ribs in a different way. Sirius didn't know what to think as he instinctively began returning the hug, his mind yelling at him all the more for indulging in such things when he ought to be disemboweled on the spot. This didn't add up to the murderous look Harry had possessed moments ago when hearing out their first exchange in Harry's life and Sirius just didn't understand what to think anymore. Was Harry just projecting what everyone else was and trying to give him comfort that he didn't deserve? Why would his memories at thirteen be attacking him with such violence if it wasn't directed at Sirius, the only person there who was hurting Harry and his friends?

Harry slowly released him from the hug, looking sheepish as he took a step back and met his eyes. There was hardly an inch worth of heights difference in him and James, but his green eyes were more earnest than anyone had ever seen them as Harry began, "I, err, sorry about that, I just couldn't stand to see you like that." He hesitated, then sucked in a deep breath and began very slowly "I, know there's a reason you-" then he cut himself off with a horrible wince and pressed his palm back to his temple looking more frustrated than he ever had in his life. He looked truly miserable that he couldn't tell him something, but the price would be the same as before, and by now they seemed to have gotten through to Harry that wasn't worth it. Harry still looked like he was going to bolster himself and say something anyways, his own pain be damned, but then James cut in with a grumpy look still in place, aimed at Remus for hexing them though.

"If Harry says there's a reason for this, then there is. You Padfoot," James directed at his best friend, grabbing hold of his shoulder and steering him back to the couch, "are going to sit there and listen to it" it didn't take but a gentle shove and Sirius fell back into his spot, "or so help me I'll Stupefy you until all of these books are done."

Sirius looked akin to a kicked puppy, more confused than he'd ever been in his life, but really what could he say? Harry still believed in him, they all did! So unless he literally heard the words 'Sirius you're not the one doing all of this to Harry it's insert name' he wasn't ever going to feel like he deserved to be in this house again, but he took his friends threats seriously. It might even have made him laugh on any other day that his reaction now had been very similar to Remus when they'd first told him they knew he was a werewolf. He'd flipped out, tried to make a run for it, looked quite terrified that the lot of them were going to curse him into oblivion just for existing, but then they'd gotten it through his head that he was being an idiot for thinking it. That didn't make what he was hearing any better, since the situations weren't the same and Remus wasn't the one who'd apparently killed all of those people and was trying to do the same to Harry, Merlin by this rate Remus actually had a cleaner record then him now. That memory was however keeping him in place while Remus fetched up the book and went back to read what was really going on here.

Lily frowned and tensed up, wondering what new worry could be happening all over again. She already felt useless not having any way to reassure Sirius like his friends were doing, this new thing now attacking Harry most likely wasn't going to make her feel any better. She was starting to regret having slipped off in the hubbub and putting the baby back away, but all of that screaming wasn't good for him to be around, and with Sirius acting like this she really didn't see it stopping. Maybe she should have just compensated and forced him to hold the baby, but it was too late now.

James really wanted to laugh at that, of all the places for this to happen it did not seem like a coincidence they'd wound up there, but held it back for the sake of not interrupting and finding out what Sirius was doing. He wasn't that concerned for Harry's safety as far as the tree either, Sirius knew how to paralyze it and probably would do it long enough for Harry to get out of danger.

Apparently Remus didn't agree, as the longer he read the more angsty his voice became. He looked almost as bad as Harry, though James couldn't fathom why any more then why he could guess what was bothering either of them. He dearly wanted to ask Remus, knowing better than to ask Harry, but why wouldn't Remus say it himself? It wasn't possible it had anything to do with Sirius, he'd just got done defending him, it wasn't possible Remus would have suspicions about him. Then why wouldn't he say whatever was on his mind, try to relive some of the tension that was eating Sirius alive? At this point that friend was making him damn near as nervous as the other.

While the others frowned in shock as Sirius continued to attack Ron like that, not even bothering to stop the tree long enough for Harry to join which should have been the point of it; Remus didn't.

If anything his mind was racing all the faster, trying to put it all together, and not liking one little bit what he was coming up with. He'd been trying for so long now to come up with any other remote possibility of who could have been behind this? Well, who else had been at the scene with Sirius? Who was Sirius dragging around in Ron's pocket... he never in his life would have considered this before, it must just be paranoia, then his eyes would once again flicker towards Harry, and he couldn't help remembering all over again Harry's nearly cursed reaction to a rat with a missing finger reappearing.

Sirius had flinched so hard he looked like a gun had been shot at his own head, but then James hand twitched towards his pocket, and Sirius knew that threat had been very real, he'd pay dearly if he did try that stunt again, so he instead began twisting his hands around in his lap trying to find some way to relieve the stress.

Sirius dearly wanted to laugh that was what Harry thought was going on then, but it did make the question occur to him for the first time; getting past the act of what he was doing and truly wondering why he was doing it? Why Ron? In fact, once could have been labelled as an accident in a dark dormitory, but this was actually twice now he'd seemed to single Ron out when Harry was right there. He honestly had no idea, but didn't want to linger on it any longer than anything else as he still couldn't get the image out of his mind of his future mad self-going into a deranged panic and attacking Harry, then an innocent bystander.

"Even if you had the map, it doesn't work like that," James forced out, still trying desperately to keep the mood as calm as possible. "You'd have to have someone who knows their Herbology to tell you." It had taken them all becoming animagus' for Remus to admit how to do it for them, and he'd only learned it because Madam Pomfrey had been doing it for him for all those years.

Lily made an odd noise, finding that quite intelligent for a cat to know. How, why would it even know to do that? Was it possible Sirius had taught him, they had been seen hanging around, had Sirius taught the cat to do that from the many times he'd most likely been slipping in and out of the tree all that year? It still wasn't the oddest thing going on this year, so Lily couldn't bring herself to say anything.

"Definitely not wrong on that one," James said a little too loudly. He was growing sick of being the only one speaking into the void like silence, but at this rate if the silence dragged on it felt even more awkward so he wasn't planning on stopping.

"Least he doesn't think you're a Grim anymore," Lily said in sympathy for James looking more annoyed the longer Sirius kept up his clamped shut mouth, and for Sirius in hopes to make at least one little worry line disappear. It was such a random thing to point out at this time, that it worked on both counts, each glancing at her and giving her the barest of a smile for the effort.

"Bet that's easier on four legs," Harry offered half-heartedly, trying very hard to keep aside the mental image he'd had at the time of Ron struggling along that same dirt, the random flecks of blood he'd seen along the way, how much force Sirius had to have used to get him to come along despite a broken leg and now twisted arm. He now knew without a shadow of a doubt Sirius hadn't really meant to hurt his friend... he was just at a loss why it was happening.

"Maybe for some," James scoffed, his heart set on keeping the strain out of his voice as he explained his stag had always been big enough he'd always had to do what Harry was.

While still reading with more intensity than he ever had before, Remus couldn't help a small little wince for a whole other reason as he never enjoyed hearing about his handiwork.

"Least she's as brilliant as ever," Sirius muttered without any enthusiasm, but the bright eyed look that lit up the other four for his pitiful attempt was worth it.

Harry couldn't help a new level of surprise as that room came back into full relapse, all the destruction he'd seen and now realizing what really had happened.

"And Harry's keeping himself sharp as a horn," James happily added on.

Lily couldn't help but find this almost mildly amusing when she reflected that as far as Harry and Hermione were concerned, they were getting this worked up over a dog. Yes their friend was hurt and in trouble, but they had no idea what they were really walking into, as far as they knew it was just some deranged animal. She neglected saying that though, since she found the joke in very poor taste.

Sirius still winced horribly at the reminder of what he'd done to the kid, intentionally or not, but there was no use in apologizing to someone who wasn't here, and Harry clearly wasn't holding a grudge, so... so maybe all was forgiven in the end? What on earth could he have done to gain Harry's trust after everything that had happened this year? It was all that was keeping him listening at this point.

Lily couldn't help but be genuinely surprised and impressed at that feat. Sirius had just pulled that off after twelve years of no magic, Merlin after dementors had just spent said years draining his magic, with Ron's wand. While powerful though, she didn't want to interrupt just for the sake of possibly inflating his ego when he came back to himself later and realized Lily had given him a compliment.

Remus could not get through that without making a few retching noises of disgust, going pale and shaking all over again as he was visibly reminded what his friend had been living in those twelve long years. Only his eyes flickering up to the real Sirius, hunched and looking fairly sick himself but still his friend, kept him minimally at ease.

"Guess that's not the worst first thing you could have said to him," James said absently, now more keyed up possibly then he'd been in his life. His crappy choice of circumstances aside, he'd hug Sirius all over again if they finally got some bleeding answers from the man himself explaining what had been going on this year!

"Now that's a spooky thought," Lily tried to poke fun, never having gone longer than a few days without hearing it since her first year at school how many years ago now?

"But that probably was," Harry couldn't help but mutter with a wince, his dad the worse thing Sirius could have said right then considering his thirteen year old thoughts.

Sirius couldn't help the self-inflicted disgust, knowing Harry had a right to hate him for that, though his desperate need to know the real reason why instead of Fudge's tale kept his mouth shut instead of trying to get out an apology. Harry caught his eye then and gave him a brief smile, which pretty much said he hadn't needed one anyways.

All five of them shuddered terribly at that declaration, though the four from this time because they'd never wanted to hear such a thing coming from their little baby, directed at someone in this room no less.

Harry because he just couldn't fathom such a want in his life, and Sirius the least of all. If only he could remember why already and help to put him at ease once and for all.

"Don't honestly want to know what you were thinking right then," Remus grumbled distractedly, still not looking up.

Harry couldn't help a wince, getting a little feeling they may find out anyways.

Harry gave a start for a whole new reason as he eyed the book, suddenly looking more bright-eyed than normal. Harry of course felt the same way, Ron and Hermione had been his first real friends, the start of his own family he'd always craved. He'd had no idea though that they'd felt the same for him, the flash of warmth though only reminded him that he had no idea where they were now. It nearly scared him as much as what was happening to Sirius that he could only hope with all his might they were safe where ever they were.

For the first time since his Quidditch chapter, Sirius finally got out a genuine smile as he saw in Harry's friend what he still held true to his dying breath for his own.

James gave a smug look when he saw that, now wanting to press in more than ever that of course that was true for Harry's friends, they'd long since proven that back during their first year, and Sirius who had clearly just seen himself in the boy he'd just attacked. Then his eyes caught Remus, who'd given an indulgent smile at the pair of them as he'd obviously just felt the same thing, then his eyes shadowed over with something malevolent and he went back to reading in a forced neutral voice. That was beginning to scare James nearly as much as Sirius was, and he finally called him out on it. "Would you spit it out already?"

Nobody else looked confused, clearly they'd all been seeing him act the same way, only Remus tried to brush it off with a muttered, "it's nothing-"

"Bollocks," Sirius huffed, rubbing his palms hard across his knees to keep away some of the sweat that just kept building up there. "You've been acting cross for ages now, and if it's not about me which you've made quite clear, what is it?"

Remus had never been very good at keeping secrets from his friends, despite his abundance of practice, then again they'd found that out in more time than he would have given them credit for so he supposed that really was as true as it got. He just couldn't bring himself to say it though, still could hardly properly form the thought in his head, because it just wasn't true. It must all be circumstantial, or more fraudulence against another of his friends. He had to swallow very hard around a great lump in his throat as he said, "it is nothing, really, you'll laugh, we all will when this is said and done, so let's be done with it."

He didn't let them have time to argue, and they really were so tired with this year they didn't want to honestly hear anything but the truth anymore, and enough with anyone's speculation.

"Least you clearly regret what you did," Lily said approvingly, almost giddy to see him looking almost back to himself again.

"Pretty sure I picked up on that yeah," Sirius muttered, his nose wrinkling with distaste that Ron had to say it, let alone the thought actually coming to mind.

Lily felt her mouth go cotton dry at that declaration, that old fear rearing its ugly head again. Had Sirius lost his bleeding mind in Azkaban? Why on earth would he say that!

Sirius went so rigid he was likely to break in half at the slightest touch, as he couldn't help but do a headcount of the room, and oh sweet Merlin he couldn't really mean...

"No one died that night," Harry frowned, startling his parents out of their heart stopping confusion at that declaration. Harry's expression though was just as confusing to consider, since he looked mildly annoyed at the fact.

James had to clear his throat, hard, before stating, "well, I'm more then glad to hear it, but I don't suppose you know why he'd say that then?" James regretted asking at once, Harry's face twisted back up with pain as he forced a memory to remain suppressed, but it really had slipped out in his desperate need to know what on earth Sirius had been thinking in saying that!

"No one died tonight," Harry repeated with the utmost conviction, he hadn't sounded so sure since he'd told Lily it hadn't been Snape trying to steal the Stone first year. It didn't ease any of his sickly features at not being able to remember the hows or whys of it, but at least Sirius blinked again like he had come back from a long way off.

Remus was the only one who hadn't been able to gather himself to say anything, and that's because his mind had been spinning on something else. He'd done a head count as well, but unlike Sirius he'd included every alive thing in that room, and, and how Padfoot would recognize a certain rat better than anyone... he nearly bit his tongue off trying to convince himself to remain silent, fairly certain James would curse him into oblivion for suggesting it while Sirius would probably help for the reminder that his friend was dead because of him at this time, but it didn't change the fact that it was all adding up in a very dark and twisted way the more he read.

Sirius hadn't forgotten one little bit the pain at hearing Harry really thought him capable of that, and it coming from the boys own mouth nearly sent him into a screaming fit again, but when Harry quivered like he was fighting the impulse to rush over to Sirius and hug him again in apology Sirius kept himself cooled and gave him a smile that plainly said it was as forgiven as unnecessary.

Sirius gave such a horrid fidget James really was getting concerned he was going into some sort of seizure, and his own heartbreak at hearing those words was only comparable to his want to do everything in his power for Sirius to know there wasn't a way that could possibly be true!

Sirius kept it in and didn't react like he wanted, running and screaming for the hills in shame, but at least this time he had a vague distraction from his own impending life in spotting the look on James face and correctly guessing it was for that blasted reminder the father wasn't there for his child, and instead pressed his shoulder into his this time and offered him a brave smile, that look letting him know they would find a way to change that!

Remus could not actually scream those words like Harry had, in fact the words barely came out as a whisper, but since that was the last thing he'd ever believe any more than anyone else in this room, he tried to brush it by. His mind quickly supplied, or anyone else in the Order, because that just had to be true and he was being paranoid and trying to find anyone to blame but Sirius... he snapped away that train of thought because none of this was answers, just Harry reacting like anyone would expect him to do in that circumstance, so he read with pure pity.

While Sirius really couldn't blame the kid one little bit for these actions, he'd been feeling the exact same way towards the nameless faceless person who had done all of these things, he saw the shame building in Harry as he realized how wrong his actions were and so Sirius offered, "I'm at least happy you took it out on me."

Remus made to tell him off for that, clearly going back to repeating that Sirius didn't deserve a second of this, but Sirius quickly insisted, "at least he's doing it to me, who won't retaliate, rather than the soon to be corpse who possibly would curse Harry for whatever he's about to do or say."

This wasn't as comforting as he'd meant it, but at least they admitted this was the vaguest bit better than the scenario Sirius had described.

"And there's that," Sirius added on with an unamused twist of his lips, certain beyond doubt that seeing Harry again at all would stun him stupid, let alone this horrid reaction.

James gave a horrible shiver, never before in his life had the idea that Harry would one day be attacking his brother like this and mean it, and how misguided Harry was in doing it didn't change the vivid mental image. What could he say though? Harry was as justified as anyone in doing this to the man he thought had taken his parents away, and Sirius was right in saying it was better the one person who wouldn't hurt Harry back then someone who would have reacted by just blasting him away like what had been done to Peter. None of that was making him feel any better and left him a twitching mess as he fought back the compulsion to go for his own wand and teach someone a lesson for attacking his best friend. The horrid war of Harry going after Sirius like that was likely to leave as bad a scar as everything that had happened to Sirius this year.

Sirius gave a little start of shock, but Lily gave him a wane smile as she pointed out, "reflexes dear, any wizard would have reacted by trying to shoot a stunning spell no matter the situation."

Sirius did feel a little better, it would have been the same if he'd had a bat in his hand and a Bludger had been heading his way, but the idea of anyone trying to use a spell on Harry set that murderous feeling back up tenfold, yes even at himself.

Remus made a terrible choking noise like someone was doing that to him, and while Harry was rubbing absently at his throat he shrugged and said, "it surprised me more than hurt." He tried to sound like this should be shrugged off like his mum had done, but the effect was ruined by the frown still in place. No matter his assurance that Harry seemed almost careless of how Sirius was being with him in those moments, it didn't erase how uneasy he felt about his night in this Shack. Sirius was there for a very particular reason, and it wasn't Harry, in fact Harry almost had the feeling he was being a nuisance to what was really going on, but of course he still couldn't remember what that was.

Remus had to really fight the impulse to reach over and strangle Sirius, the person on hand who'd dare lay a hand on Harry, but he resisted the urge in favor of finding out what Sirius had meant. Waited too long seemed pretty ominous, waited for what? The chance to see Harry, that seemed like the last thing on his mind at this point, in fact when coming face to face with Harry every step of the way he'd gone for Ron instead. This wasn't helping to kick out that stupid little poisonous bubble that kept floating around in his mind.

"Can't ever say enough how much I adore your friends," Sirius managed to get out, no matter who it was being directed at those two had just put themselves in a very real risk coming to Harry's aid, which is exactly what they'd been doing the past two years as well, and he never got tired of hearing it.

Harry's arm gave a little spaz at that remembered pain, his face more shocked than anything though as he'd never heard of a cat being so loyal, and not even to Hermione.

James clearly felt the same way, saying, "jeez Padfoot, you sure know how to pick the best of them."

"I picked you three didn't I," Sirius shrugged, looking just as surprised as anyone.

Sirius still looked like he'd rather be pummeled by a bunch of thirteen year olds right now then continue to hear about this. He'd clearly been struggling to get away from Ron and Hermione enough to hurt them back, which was not encouraging him one bit towards this whole he was fighting back on instinct thing, nor did any of this explain why he was attacking them at all! If he was really so far gone he'd hurt Ron like that, what else was he capable of doing?

Lily really wished something would happen like within the next few seconds to turn this bloody conversation into something else, fear for every last one of these people leaving her in a mess as she reflected that things had gone bad enough and still they'd had no answers.

'The thought crossed my mind' Harry couldn't help but think, though the very thought of it now made him rather break every last one of his fingers.

Sirius really couldn't help it, he covered his face with his hands in absolute shame for how sure he was this to be true, and for Harry to know it…the last thing in the world that he wanted was exactly what James did, throw a protective arm over his brother and mutter over and over again that wasn't what had happened.

"Ow!"

James had used his grip to squeeze as tight as he could, eliciting the shock of pain from Sirius before he could do or say anything.

"You've been saying that since this whole thing started, so you're the last person I want to hear an explanation from." James growled loud enough no one dared speak contrary. "Clearly you're as delusional then as you're being now." He was going a very ugly white/ green color from shock at that declaration, but he'd never believe this for a second until Sirius himself bestowed that curse to him in person. Right now he was banking on perhaps his friend had been cursed to do all of those horrible things, and Sirius hadn't been able to fight it off. The Imperious curse could make people do unspeakable things and leave the person behind feeling as guilt ridden as if it had been their decision. So maybe Sirius had done those things and that's what he meant, but it wasn't Sirius who had done them!

Lily and Harry would have never disagreed to the contrary, while Remus felt like a fool. Sirius had said it himself that he'd done these things, and Remus was over here trying to inflict it on someone else. Maybe Sirius had done what this future foretold, but he still couldn't come to grips with believing that until he found the whole thing out.

It was really starting to bother James how quiet Remus had been of late, and if he really was starting to get suspicious Remus would be the first to see how stupid he was being.

Lily still couldn't help a little internal sigh of relief when Remus read that. Of course she was adamant as her husband at Sirius' true innocence, but his words just kept scaring her more and more as this continued. Now that Sirius had said that though, there must be something to all of those stories left out, and Sirius would be the one to say it!

"Instead of stuttering around, I really wish you'd say it," James hissed in his ear, and Sirius nodded in absolute agreement to that, more than sick of his future actions already, he didn't need this delay.

Sirius felt a prick of tears at that blunt reminder, while Harry leaned into his mother again at his own choice of words.

James really couldn't help himself that time as he released a snort of mirth. Of all the things to be standing up for his friend in that moment, it was a cat! Remus was up in the castle with no clue of what was going on, he and Peter were long since gone and couldn't do anything, and the last thing to stick up for their brother was a cat! A cat they'd been mocking all year for its go at Scabbers, the cat they'd been picking on because of how odd it was. He nearly wanted to laugh again at the absurdity of it all, but he couldn't really bring himself to do it at just how depressing that was.

"Sounds about right," Lily muttered without any amusement, that was his usual response whenever Hickory was in the room and tried to get his attention.

"Well now you're just being cruel," Sirius huffed under his breath, receiving a pop on the back of his head from James for that.

James really couldn't help a vague snicker at that, a cat being in league with anyone was normally a sentence he'd laugh at just for the sake of mocking.

Sirius made to say 'maybe when they're yelling at me for taking you out on my bike' but he knew he could never make a joke at that blasphemous sentence again without keeling over.

"To be perfectly honest, even if Merlin stop it you do meet the man who did that to us, I still wouldn't want you to do that," Lily told him sharply. His emotions were understandable of course, if it had only been Harry who'd been killed not a force could have stopped her from murdering who'd done it, but that didn't mean she wanted her baby doing the same thing!

Harry had a very calculating look on his face as he considered her, finding something of importance in her words, then he glanced at his father who had a very ugly look on his face.

He noticed Harry's watching though and quickly tried to get rid of it, saying quickly, "nope, I'm with your mother on that one all the way kid, absolutely no murder before you even know the spell."

He'd tried to make it a joke there at the end, he'd be a hypocrite if he pretended he'd never killed anyone in this war, but it didn't erase what he really meant right then which came through just fine to Harry. He really didn't want his son going after the man who'd done this to him, instead he leaned into Sirius' ear and whispered for him alone, "that's what you and Remus are for."

That finally gave Sirius something new to focus on as he registered those words. James was right of course, Harry shouldn't be the one to do that, he was still just a kid who they'd never want to go through the life altering process of killing anyone. Sirius on the other hand would feel it was his sole duty to do just that in vengeance from what had been taken from him, if only he could figure out where to start.

"Do you even know a spell to do it," Remus finally cracked and spoke up again, sounding so distant he didn't even seem to realize he'd spoken.

"No," Harry admitted, still looking shamefaced at his actions, mostly because they were towards Sirius. He was so distracted by this constant feeling that something his mother had said really spoke to him, but as always he'd no idea why. In that moment he'd been planning on using a fire spell Dean had taught him ages ago and pointed right at the man's chest it would have worked just fine, but of course now thinking of that made him retch.*

This caused mixed reactions for everyone in the room. On the one hand, Sirius was a criminal in this future and anyone who came up those stairs would think that first when they saw him so Sirius needed to get out of there, now! On the other side, Sirius hadn't said a damned thing! He'd brought Ron in there and had then spent the time being abused by Harry and hadn't said anything in defense of himself like they all would have thought, and no one wanted this conversation to end until they got something out of it!

That didn't even begin to cover their shock of who on earth that could be, as only one other person at school even knew how to get in there, and Remus had no reason to go down there now... unless it was a full moon.

It seemed to strike all of them at the same time that the longer they thought on this the more rotten the outcomes, so Remus just kept reading in hopes someone would explain something already.

"Well that's, good," Lily said slowly. They'd already realized the only reason Remus would have gone in there at that time would be because it was a full moon that night, but hey this was just more explaining that needed to happen. Maybe now that Remus and Sirius were finally shown in the same room someone would give up something.

"Really though, I still don't know what exactly I was going to do with it anyways," Harry grumbled. He remembered feeling angry at himself for not acting when he had the chance, but Remus' arrival now put him in a far better mood now than it had then so he didn't care so long as he finally got his answers.

"And I couldn't be happier," Lily told him simply, the image of her baby actually having the intent to kill on anyone, let alone Sirius, going to haunt her for some time.

That gave them all a right fright, even if Remus would never do such a thing it was never a sentence they could ever hear.

"Err, where's who?" James asked, blinking curiously. That had been the last thing he'd been expecting his friend to say upon his entrance.

Remus did not look happy at his own question, his voice growing so dark the longer this carried on the others were starting to wonder if Remus knew exactly what he meant and just wasn't sharing. Had Remus now figured out who had done all of this? It didn't answer why he wouldn't say this to them, but when Lily tried to interrupt to ask Remus blatantly ignored her and kept reading loudly.

That finally seemed to confirm whatever was bothering him, because he looked so confused and hurt at reading that, that the book nearly shook right out of his hands.

"Remus," Sirius said pleadingly, ducking to try and catch his eye since he still wasn't looking at them. "You are honestly scaring me right now mate, and I thought I was doing that to myself enough."

Remus tried with all of his might to put some expression on his face rather than the cold fear Sirius' movement in the book had given him but it just wasn't working. He still ignored the lot of them, no longer able to convince himself in any way that he had been imagining it all, but still trying to come up with how he'd been so right.

"Switched what!?" Lily snarled in outrage, more than sick of these constant riddles! Just once couldn't her son get a straight answer, now even her friends were driving her crazy! Remus was still ignoring her, and at this point Lily was fixing to march over and snatch that book away to make at least him explain himself, when something he'd read gave her pause. Switched? What was the only thing they could be talking about, that had made Sirius so convinced he'd screwed up and gotten them killed? The Secret Keeper position of course, but switched with who? And why wouldn't they tell Remus? Since Lily was only beginning to catch up with what Remus may very well be looking so murderous about, she was left more floundering and confused when she realized she'd missed her chance and Remus was still reading.

Remus' tone only switched for the briefest second, cooling down to indulgent happiness before he realized how far he'd normally extend that description, and he switched right back to fury despite now having to ignore Sirius and James who were insistently trying to get him to stop for a second.

"Oh yeah, almost forgot she knew about that," James said randomly, now growing impatient at being ignored. If Remus knew something he needed to share it dammit.

"Wasn't exactly doing a stellar job of that covering though," Harry grumbled, since they had again asked Hermione if she knew what was up with Lupin when they'd become friends again, but she'd still said nothing about it. She hadn't exactly lied and made up an excuse, which had left them still wondering. Harry was sure if she'd been doing that to other students to, it wouldn't have exactly eased suspicions any more.

"Guess that would be a shock for them to find out, how many years late," Sirius huffed, more than irked at this rate that Remus wasn't giving them a single second to ask what he was on about, and were just too curious to get the answers from the future to demand them from him.

That finally made Remus pause, his whole body going so numb the book nearly fell from his grip. In his shock and anger at realizing what really could have been going on the past twelve years, who had been responsible, it hadn't come back full circle to explain Remus' actions to himself, he'd been caught up in the other parts. Now that he'd said that though, his breath caught tight, his vision narrowed, and he suddenly realized in that second that he'd meant it before. That day in his office when they'd spoken so lightly of Sirius being Kissed, he'd meant every little bit of that careless nature he'd shown for Sirius, because he'd, he had really thought he'd done it. "Ouch!" The sharp tug that came from his ear nearly being ripped off forced him to come back and realize that Sirius was glaring at him with such a twisted face he should be thankful that ear really was still attached.

"Great," Sirius said so loudly he was nearly screaming it, his face a fascinating combination of flushed rage and pale fear, "now that I have your attention, explain yourself before I pull your tongue out next."

Remus couldn't look at him though, could not meet his eyes in that moment nor did he think he could again. He just sat there like a statue, his lip trembling and looking sicker than his friends had ever seen him, which was really saying something considering how close to a full moon it was in this time. Before Sirius could carry out on his very real threat right then, James hit his wits end.

He grabbed hold of Sirius and shoved him so that he was at the other end of the sofa, then sat down in between the two like a stern father separating his children, a rather odd thing when he considered it was usually Remus who broke up their squabbles, or encouraged them depending on the actual spat. This though had nothing usual about it, as James would much rather knock their heads together they were both driving him crazy. Sirius was acting insane in even thinking of what his future actions implied, and Remus was literally driving him crazy acting so distant and blood lusting at the same time. It wasn't so uncommon for Remus to get moody around a full moon, his emotions tended to just be easier to flare and they'd all figured that out years ago, but this was something far different and it was scaring both of his friends senseless.

Now that he'd stopped the violence between the two though, he was fixing to demand his own answers, when Lily had enough. She got up and snatched the book away before anyone could protest, silencing them all with a look as she said, "if you don't mind, I'm going to see what the bloody hell is going on," she waved the book around for emphasis, then jabbed a finger at them stating, "if you three want to keep acting like idiots take it in another room and Harry and I will explain it to you when you've all calmed down."

Since they very obviously weren't leaving, Lily still ignored them as she went back and continued reading loudly. James and Sirius still looked frustrated they hadn't got their answer, but Remus looked relieved he hadn't had to speak yet, he was positive he couldn't have gotten the words out.

"I am genuinely offended that's what she caught on," James grumbled, knowing if anyone else had said that he'd be sure to blast them away for the implications that Remus was a bad person just because of this, but since Hermione had already proven she didn't care of this fact except when she'd revealed it in cadence with being with Sirius he let it slide.

"Really Remus," Sirius demanded, looking very much like he wanted to laugh. "You're grading her, now!"

"You know he can't help himself, he did always grade our pranks on a scale," James reminded in forced calm, both boys getting more and more concerned the longer Remus stayed locked up. James nearly wanted to pull his hair out in frustration at this point, thinking if it wasn't one of his friends it was the other lately who were going to make him go bald from stress.

Remus flinched so hard in shock and shame that Sirius couldn't help saying, "Okay, I don't regret biting Ron anymore, he deserved it just for that," through gritted teeth. He did kind of mean it, as he would never stand by and let anyone talk to his friend that way, but it didn't ease anything going on in the room. None of this was new information to them after all, it was just depressing at the kid's reaction.

Harry heard that and gave Sirius an unhappy look, he didn't think Sirius meant it at all, and that was his friend! They'd admitted themselves one of their own friends had a bad reaction to finding out, so Ron shouldn't be judged for his initial shock.

"Still owe him a one for that too," James added, looking just as fearsome as Sirius and having to fight the impulse to do the same and tell off Ron for his actions.

Even Lily couldn't read that part without some own bite in her words, she'd have smacked Ron a good one if he'd been here now and said that.

"Probably just one actually," James growled, since all of the teachers there knew Remus from when he was in school and the only one who would have actually protested was that slimy little git ball of hatred and unforgiving childhood problems!

'Clearly not,' Sirius couldn't help but think with a frown in place, his own shock at that revelation still not quite wearing off. The one person he'd been absolutely sure of as an ally, and he'd been wrong. Even Remus had been convinced of those things he'd done, apparently even himself believed it because of his own passing comment. It stung, a lot, but he couldn't bring himself to hate Remus for it either. He didn't really have a right when he so clearly was thinking the same thing, and hating his friend for agreeing with him made no sense. What the bloody hell had he done though, that would change things so rapidly? Was it all because of that Secret Keeper nonsense, and, and they had changed without telling Remus. That's what he'd read, which meant that Remus had thought Sirius had betrayed his brother with intent. Why wouldn't they have told Remus they were switching though? What the bloody hell could change in this year that would lead to altering their whole lives. Who had they even switched it to if not him? If it actually wasn't him, then why did he blame himself? He was bogging himself down with all of the questions he'd had for so long now and still wasn't getting a stinking answer to!

James wasn't taking that as lightly as Sirius though. He now wanted to take a leaf out of Sirius' book and give his friend a good kick for actually meaning that, but that would literally be kicking him while he was down. Remus looked so lost right now, his eyes unfocused on anything and still likely to cry at any second. Had this been what was bothering him the whole time, he'd been coming around to thinking he hadn't trusted Sirius? That didn't add up though, he'd been acting funny since they'd been in Hagrid's hut what felt like a lifetime ago already. They hadn't found out this mess between the two of them until just minutes ago, so whatever was tormenting Remus had to be something else, or at least combined with his feelings for Sirius.

"Least someone's being calm about all of this," Lily muttered, now wishing Remus had been there from the start if this is what it would take for the explaining to get going.

"Oh," they all muttered, that hadn't actually occurred to them, but it was a far kinder explanation than what they'd been fearing upon his entrance. At least now they didn't feel like they were on a time table before those kids had to get out of there.

"Well I should hope so," Sirius couldn't help but mutter, while also thinking on the timing of that.

"No, no, no," Harry mock scolded, "I let you get away with that once, but you shouldn't have just sprung that on me and brushed if off." He was growing as concerned as anyone at Remus' actions, but the man hardly flinched at Harry talking to him.

Sirius at least felt pleased at that explanation, thinking it would have been quite the convenience for him to have been watching it for old times' sake and just happening upon what he'd seen.

'Usually with you with me' James mentally added on with a frown still in place, but he didn't see the point in saying that now as everyone here knew it.

"Um, no they weren't," Lily said, frowning first at the book then at Remus, wondering if he'd gone and lost his mind right along with Sirius now.

James looked just as confused, but Sirius suddenly went as stiff as Remus on his other side. Sirius was now blinking hard, his mind jumping back to when Remus had started acting weird, and putting it together with that...and how they had left with another, a rat...

Lily felt like her mind was beginning to short circuit, what Remus was implying wasn't physically possible, because the only person he could be implying had died, twelve years ago...

Sirius' breaths were coming out in sharp little pants now, he'd caught up to Remus and Lily very quickly, though unlike them he was still half floored on the denial where they'd moved pace to the sickening realization that all the pieces were fitting together just a little too well...

James made a noise like he'd never before made in his life. He had no idea what any of them were on about, because of course they were being ridiculous. It just wasn't possible, not of one of his friends. He turned to Harry, the one he was sure was fixing to laugh them all off for focusing so much on a silly pet rat. Surely like the other times they'd been wrong, his son would just look confused or indulgent or even frustrated. Instead he found his son pressing the heel of his hand into his temple, a set look on his features that made it all to clear his memory was returning to him, and the book was exactly on the right track.

Lily could feel something very bad crawling up inside of her, like a monster wanting to lung from her chest and trying to strangle out her words, but she kept reading the print like it was a lifeline, now more determined than ever before to understand, to get a name she could never want to hear come out of her boys mouth, not like this.

"Sirius, wait, don't!" Harry called, but it was too late. Sirius wasn't listening, and he instinctively ducked as someone made to grab at him to stop him. He had made it to the perimeter of the house's boundaries before Harry's words had even fully left his mouth, and he disapparated.

"Dad," Harry called desperately.

James gave Harry a tortured look as he said, "Sorry son-" then he to vanished with a loud crack.

Harry was groaning, almost doubled over as he looked on at them in panic, his eyes flashing to Remus and Lily in undisguised fear as he whispered, "They're in danger! I don't know what's happening, but they can't leave! I, I have to-" he broke himself off, swallowed hard, then straightened back to his full height he declared, "I'm going after them. Tell me where Pettigrew is living now, and I'll bring them back before they can do anything. But you two can't leave, I-" he broke off in frustration, casting skyward looks in desperation to come up with something to say to convince them.

Remus and Lily exchanged heartbroken looks, very unwilling to allow Harry to go out by himself, but more worried still by Harry's veracity about their staying put. So Remus spoke, "Okay Harry, we promise. We'll stay here, and we'll give you five minutes alright. If you're not back by then though, I am coming after you." He then went on to tell Harry where exactly he should apparate to.

Harry took a brief second to consider whether he could even pull this off, as he had no real memory of even how to apparate, but decided to rely on muscle memory and not force the knowledge, hoping that would work. He nodded gratefully, stopping for just a brief moment to hug them both, then he disappeared with a resounding crack.

* * *

…Kind of sorry for the cliffhanger chapter break…

I struggled a lot with this chapter trying to balance out Sirius' fears finally being realized, Harry trying to reassure him without giving anything away, and juggling in the others, sorry if it comes across half as mixed up as I feel it is.

Also random note I'm kind of sorry Lily hasn't much to do, nor will she mostly for a while because this really is a Marauder meltdown and while she'll feel as betrayed as anyone it really just isn't quite as personal.

*I really have no idea how Harry had planned on killing him, since he obviously didn't know the killing curse yet, nor do I really think he knew Confringo or very many other ways to kill in only his third year of school.


	18. MOONY, WORMTAIL, PADFOOT, AND PRONGS

Lily screamed when he reappeared with the two of them knocked out. Remus hurried forward at once, and grabbed hold of Sirius by himself, while Lily came on his other side and helped support his dad back into the living room.

"What happened," Lily demanded as she laid James out on the couch, much like Harry had been when he'd first arrived there. Remus had taken Sirius over and put him down on the other sofa.

"I don't know," Harry said miserably, "I found them just like this, so I brought them back here."

"You don't think they've lost their memories now do you," Lily demanded, watching Remus prod at both boy's gently, muttering a few spells over them, "or worse," Lily continued, her voice continuing to heighten in fear, "they were attacked!"

Before anyone could respond, Sirius groaned, rolling into the cushions of the couch and muttering something about the light being on.

"Sirius? Padfoot, can you hear me?" Remus prompted, leaning right into his friend's face.

"Course I can hear you," he groaned, the words muffled by the pillow, "you're yelling in my face you twat."

Remus couldn't suppress the grin that came over him then as he prodded further, "Alright then, sit up will you. Come on, please, just look at me."

Sirius groaned before he really did roll over and give his friend a disdainful look and muttering, "What?"

Then his eyes ghosted around the room, landed right on Harry, and recognition came back, along with the righteous fury that had possessed him to break his promise and leave. He sat up so suddenly, his head crashed against Remus' but that didn't stop him from lunging to his feet and looking to make his way to the door all over again.

"Wait!" Harry said desperately, more prepared this time and making it there first, "Sirius, please, just listen. I, I can't imagine what you're feeling right now, but just listen! I found you passed out, after you disapparated away from here! Something happened to you when you left, and what if it happens again?"

Sirius really did hesitate then, his eyes ghosting back to James as he asked, "Him?"

"Same," Harry nodded eagerly, his tone still soothing as he kept his Godfather's attention, "he was just passed out. I don't know why it didn't happen to me, but I'm telling you, it has something to do with you lot leaving here. I just knew something bad was going to happen," he finished, trailing off into mutters.

Then James began groaning from the couch, doing much like Sirius and trying to roll himself into the cushions and looking like he just wanted to take a nap.

Sirius sighed, giving one last longing look at the door, but acquitted that there was nothing for it. If he truly was just going to pass out, then he would just have to take his chance and murder that blighter the next time that traitor came over here. That gave him pause for the cruelest smile Harry had ever seen, making him want to take an automatic step back.

After much the same conversation with James when he came to, they sat around for a moment and eyed the book like it was living poison. They all desperately wanted to keep going, but this turn of events was still plaguing them, so Lily finally found her normal voice again and asked, "Don't suppose you know why we can't leave the premises then? Is it permanent?"

"No," Harry began with conviction, then dissolved into his usual stance of pressing his hand to his temple and looking agitated at being unable to explain more, "I don't know why, I just knew something bad was going to happen if you leave. I think-" he began, casting his mind around for an answer that wasn't there, "something about time magic or-" he choked off, then crossed his arms and just grumbled for a few moment's about his inept mind.

The four of them exchanged world weary looks, not much appreciating what any of that implied, but what could they do? They most certainly weren't going to stop now.

James still didn't even believe this was happening! He'd gone after Sirius to try and stop him from doing something crazy, because of course that's what it was. He wouldn't believe Peter capable of this anymore then Remus or Sirius, not one of his friends. He didn't like that he could not come up with a way out of this though. He had of course realized the exact same things as everyone else, the fact that Scabbers had a missing finger and that had been the largest bit of Peter ever found. How Remus had said they'd switched Secret Keeper's from Sirius and hadn't told Remus, well who else would they switch to but Peter? There was a member of the Order who was passing along secrets, someone who Dumbledore suspected was close to the Potters... and still he couldn't fathom it coming from Peter any more than the others in this room. If Sirius had been forced to do those terrible things and been framed for it, surely Peter had the same thing happen to him!

Sirius was beside himself, well past denial as the other things clicked together for him. That rat had been acting out of it since Sirius had escaped. He hadn't been going after Ron at all, but the rat he kept on him! Those nights he'd snuck in with the knife, it's no wonder he acted like a loon as his future self had clearly been trying to act on what was pulsing through him now. The only thing he still couldn't work out was why he'd let himself sit in Azkaban for so long. If he could have turned into a dog and broken out at any time, why hadn't he been hunting down the rat this whole time? He didn't really care about the answers anymore though, he'd gotten what he wanted. The only thing stopping him from acting on it was the cruel world he lived in, which knocked him unconscious and only allowed him to wake up with a splitting headache when he was returned here!

Lily sank down into the couch, shaking white and feeling so cold and empty inside she was sure a dementor was lurking in a corner. Strangely though she couldn't find the tears to go along, couldn't really feel anything but shock at how betrayed she felt. Peter had been here less than two days ago, had held her son and hugged her goodbye. She'd even taken to calling him Wormy recently for the jokes from his friends of how much he'd been moving around and could never stay in one spot. She'd thought he was just stressed like everyone else in the Order, but never would she have spotted this.

Remus, didn't really know how to put into words everything he felt. Insulted that he hadn't seen this sooner, the clues had literally been staring them in the face since Harry met Ron. He wanted to go and curse that backstabber for literally being every source of trouble they'd had since they left school, and he was now going back and trying to count every instance of what all had gone wrong because of him! The only reason he hadn't gone after James and Sirius in time was because he'd been stuffed with his own self-hatred that he'd somehow managed to put all of this on Sirius, still always thinking of himself rather than going to help them like he should. Sure it was a good thing he hadn't now as Harry might not have been able to get all three of them back, but he still could not seem to do anything right by any of his family anymore.

Harry just sat there, convinced this had to be his fault somehow. He would trade away all of his memories all over again, give up anything if he could just understand how this all went so wrong. What had made such a good friend of his father's turn around and have this happen? Was it because of Harry, had this family been much better off if he'd never been born? He got the feeling he never even got the full understanding of this either, was never given the reason for Pettigrew's betrayal. He was the only one who seemed to want to keep going at this point, hoping there was still some way to change this, he'd bargain away his own life it that was what it took to make sure this never happened. He took another good look around the room and saw how wretched everyone looked, the book lay where it had fallen from his mother's hands half under the sofa and he wondered if it shouldn't just stay there.

No one looked even remotely prepared to continue, but he knew that there was more to come this night. Unbelievably, though the large amount of pain had left, there was still something inside of him urging him that there was another very important thing to happen this night. How could it get worse though, as he was sure that's what it had to be. Another bad thing to come in a long list of his life. The compulsion eventually won out though, and he ducked down to retrieve the book that was currently poisoning his family's life. He knew though, that it wasn't really ever going to get better. They could sit here for the next year and still be in shock over what they'd just learned, so Harry decided the best thing he could do for them was push forward and try to get out the full story, try to end this dreadful year and come up with a real plan on how to stop this mess from ever happening.

Remus realized what he was doing first, and though he couldn't even pretend at a brave face anymore, his voice came out in a ghost of his old joking tone, "I think that's mine, as Lily did cut me off."

"Chapter was done," Lily mumbled back, her dark green eyes still vacant as graves but going to rest on her son with her hand out, "so it makes it my turn anyways."

Harry hesitated, he didn't want to put this burden on anyone else, they all looked like limp soulless versions of themselves, but when he didn't make to hand it over some life sparked back to Lily and she gave her son a challenging look, now holding her hand palm out and saying with real force, "you heard me young man, we've had a good system going this whole time, no need for skipping now."

He actually managed to muster up a smile for her attempt. He knew he didn't feel a portion of the feelings everyone else in the room did, it just wasn't as personal to him. He was more caught up in what he'd lost, whereas they were coming to terms with someone they'd known their whole life wasn't who they thought; and still through all of that emotional wreckage as Lily went to find her place, the boys bucked themselves right back up. Each of them realizing that whatever they wanted to do or how they wanted to react in that moment, it literally had to wait until they could find some way to act on it. For now though, the story continued.

James felt bile rising thick and fast in his throat, desperately wanting to agree with them, but unable to get that image out of his head of his son's face, the same one he always made when the proper memory had returned to him. Harry may not have the full memory back now as his thirteen year old mind was still agreeing with his friend, but something in Harry now was clearly telling him he'd been wrong and they were right.

Sirius didn't look like he felt bad about that here anymore then he had then, this was a kind reaction to what his hands were twitching to do. He was confident if he did still have a wand on him then, this problem would have been fixed already.

Funnily enough Remus didn't look that way now, his clenched teeth and the murderous looks making it all to clear he'd rather hear about a body first and they could explain whatever they wanted later. Harry supposed that was because Professor Lupin had twelve years to stew and come to terms with what happened, had probably been waiting for an opportunity to confront who he'd thought to be the traitor all these years, and even if he'd come across the wrong suspected person this night, he still wanted his answers. Now Remus was getting the brunt of the emotion shoved on him now, and clearly wouldn't be as cool headed.

'Ron's probably going to break his spine he's holding onto him so hard' James thought wildly, still forcing the image of an innocent animal, still adamantly refusing anything else until he had no other choice.

That mellowed both of them out. They still didn't look happy about it, but the one thing they'd both agree on is that Harry had more a right to know the truth then anyone, and Sirius only hoped he wasn't so far gone he'd still at least recognize that.

'Ron seems to be getting the most abuse from this' Lily couldn't help but think in pity for him, he was nearly as involved in this as Harry.

That gave them all a horrible pause and flinch. They'd spent over twenty four hours now, looking to skin alive the fool who'd done this to Sirius, each of them convinced he'd been set up or in some way forced to do this, and now they had their man, and...and it wasn't the satisfaction they'd been picturing.

Lily was starting to feel really concerned that Remus was starting to act as psychotic as Sirius, pointing a wand at a child even if it wasn't direct. Not that she could blame them one little bit, she reflected she wouldn't be much better in that heat of the moment.

'There's a sentence I never thought I'd hear' Sirius thought with something akin to insanity coloring the edges of his mind. He couldn't ever remember being so angry in his life, that the word anger just wasn't appropriate enough. Not when he'd run away from his parents' house, not even when the other Marauders had turned on him after his horrid stunt involving Snape. The only comparable feeling was whenever he heard mention of those Dursleys and what had been implied they'd done to Harry, but this was still somehow worse, because that was only implications. Harry refused to tell what things were really going on there, so he was murder suspicious, instead of the red haze of blood he truly wished for now.

"Poor kids in denial," Sirius hissed with the blackest of disgust, not realizing his best friend would do anything to agree with Ron right then.

Remus bit his lip so hard he nearly drew blood to stop himself from making the joke he finally had proof Harry liked him more. That was his fall back after all, that was all of their default to make a joke when they'd much rather be screaming their head off, but Remus constrained himself for the sake of the story.

Remus was clearly fixing to do exactly what he'd told off Sirius for doing, make a run from the room and bury himself in a hole if he didn't feel so limp from delayed shock and disgust at himself for believing it.

The worst part was that James clearly wasn't giving him any sympathy for that, he was still refusing to believe it of the friend who was being shoved into the spot, he couldn't fathom how Remus had worked out this was ever okay. After everything they'd been through together, he found this nearly as insulting as what it was being implied Peter had done.

Lily and Harry wanted to stick up for him, protest and say that everyone had believed this and logically Remus shouldn't be judged for it, but Sirius got there first. He leaned in and whispered something in James' ear, and James jerked back looking outraged. He opened his mouth, clearly fixing to fight back, when Sirius hissed, "it's exactly the same." Sirius had to inhale slowly to keep going in a steady voice, still throwing concerned looks at Remus to make sure he was listening, "I did something stupid, I've regretted it the rest of my life, and you didn't forgive me for that until I got hurt, badly, and if we're being honest it was a stupid reason to forgive me because if you two hadn't accepted my apologies before you shouldn't have then. You might not have ever if that hadn't happened."

James didn't look happy, but he didn't argue the point anymore either. Instead he slumped into himself, just feeling tired. He was suddenly starting to feel as guilt ridden as Remus as he realized that all three of his friends, his brothers, had been pushed away from him, because of him. He'd been so horrid to Sirius after that accident with Remus, Sirius had avoided them for months, had nearly quit the Quidditch team and what if he was right? What if they never had made up for that fight and that game had saved them? Now he was doing the same thing to Remus, and it occurred to him that what if what Peter had done was his fault as well? Had he said something, done something to make Peter feel like he wasn't worth being in the Order, that made him turn on his family? Had he finally found what had caused his death, his wife's, and it was his own fault? He'd accept that blame, but it still wasn't enough for him to believe it really had been Peter to give them up to Voldemort. Surely whatever James had done to him wasn't that bad?

Remus' jaw was still chattering so hard it was a wonder he could hear anything between that and the clear guilt eating him alive. Lily and Harry were at a complete loss as to what to do to help him either, because the only person who could have convinced Remus he shouldn't walk out of here in shame was Sirius, and he was still watching James.

Sirius seemed to realize that he'd gotten through to James, who didn't look mad at Remus anymore, but he looked about ready to burst into tears anyways. Sirius just thought that he'd finally caught up with the rest of them and had moved past denial, so no one was going to pressure him into saying more and Lily convinced herself it would help if she just got it over with.

"Cause he's always played along with my games no matter how stupid he found them," Sirius said bracingly, reflecting on the irony for the moment that he was actually being the calmest of the group right now. He'd finally gotten his answer, and while he was in no little bit okay with it, he'd learned long ago how to bottle up anger in particular and let it out when needed. Right now as that was his dominant emotion, he found it much easier to play the role his friends had been trying for him this whole time, and be the support.

Remus' eyes flashed wildly to him, hope warring with confusion as he realized from that little sentence alone Sirius clearly didn't hate him like he should for his own betrayal in this tale. He wanted to say something, but couldn't decide which would be worse, for Sirius to just be making a joke he didn't mean, that he really hated and rightly now resented Remus, or that he really forgave him which Remus most certainly didn't deserve.

It occurred to Lily at the same time it had Sirius, that Remus then was being perfectly normal about this situation then while here he was a mess. She still didn't know how to help other than to keep going on.

"Of course she did," Harry muttered to himself with remembered amusement at just how much Hermione put into her homework, even this year.

"I never was the patient one," Sirius nodded solemnly, little bits of ice nearly cracking from his voice he sounded so cold at what he couldn't be doing right now. It really was a bleeding miracle he was letting Remus explain at all rather than acting on it, he sincerely doubted he'd have that same restraint now.

"Err," Lily began, looking at the boys for confirmation that this was perfectly normal. None of them reacted to it much, still to stemmed to react to much of anything normally, but Harry's face told her quite clearly he in no way thought that should be ignored, but he said nothing which meant it would be a bad idea to ask.

That snapped James out of his own funk, for the time being at least as he gave Remus a scathing look. That made it sound like it had been Remus' fault, when he'd been just a kid! The only person's fault it had been was that original werewolf!

"Does that mean there's a cure then?" Remus blurted out, his mind possibly catching on the one thing that could have jolted him back into the current story. That potion they'd been wondering about, was it really possible. He hadn't even dared believe it before now, and he felt all the more selfish and guilty when he realized that what had caught his attention was again something all about him, but it had worked. He was now far more interested in listening to Lily then his continued self-hate.

Lily couldn't actually read that without her eyes going so wide they nearly fell out of her head in shock. She glanced up with her mouth still half open and for the first time in hours she burst out in pure laughter at the look of shock on all of the boy's faces as well. She actually couldn't help it. While this in no way took away the pain and suffering they all still felt at the discovery of the betrayal, it was the first glimmer of hope and reminder that something good had actually happened, could still happen. Lily kept reading now in nearly giddy pleasure.

"I hope I smacked you for that then, you know damn well that isn't true," Sirius grumbled without any real heat, still looking punch drunk from the swirl of emotions ranging from every kind of happy his friend seemed to have found something as close to resembling a cure as it could get, and the left over hatred he doubted would go away anytime soon as he constantly remembered what all of this related to.

Remus didn't reply, he used the term loosely to explain how he was during those times, and while yes he had believed it for quite some time before his friends half managed to convince him otherwise, he had a good feeling he'd gone back to thinking it without any of them around anymore.

Even though Harry did know the end results now, he was still listening with interest. Mostly to get rid of that annoying plague that he should have done something about that door opening, that he'd forgotten about something...or someone?

That name caused a reemergence of those same feelings as before. Sirius went back to muttering death threats and glaring at the front door like it was a pit of fire he'd be all too willing to jump over if he could have his end results. Remus had to close his eyes and pinch the bridge of his nose hard to stop himself from mimicking Sirius' earlier words, that or get on his knees and beg Sirius to forgive him for making the worst mistake in his life in ever clearly thinking Sirius had been the one doing this. James still looked likely to vomit and shook his head furiously unable to picture it, to even properly form where that name lead until he had it shoved in his face and even then there had to be a good reason for it.

James remembered a much more pleasant time, like an hour ago, where he would have made a joking pout about having been named last. About how they all would have made jabs at each other for whatever order that had come out because they were such good friends it had always equaled out...and now he damn near sobbed that he'd come out last because his name had probably been the worst one to say for his friend, because he was the only one who was actually dead.

That never got easier to hear, and James gave a wince all over again for the blunt reminder that his son knew virtually nothing about him, and he was learning it now of all times! He was the first to have the reflection that this was the vaguest form of answers as to why Remus had been avoiding Harry all year. Since Remus had believed Peter really had died by Sirius' own hand, then talking about this would be the worst form of punishment to his friend.

James made a sound in his throat like he wanted to protest that. Yes Transfiguration had been one of Peter's worst subjects, but Remus made him sound daft. It sounded all the harsher coming from Lily's icy tones like she was reading about Snape abusing Neville all over again, but James was truly finding it hard to come up with any way to protest this. He felt like he was alone on an island, trying to hold out hope this still wasn't true, but the longer this went on the smaller that land was getting.

"To be perfectly honest I think you about covered it," Sirius hissed, his face looking remarkably close to how it had then, Harry reflected, even if it was directed at a door now instead of a living thing.

"You couldn't have worked that out?" James asked breathily, he was starting to feel like the oxygen in the room was running out but was still taking any tiny chance to keep his attention on his son. "How many animals do you know that have prongs?"

"I wanted a specific answer," Harry responded back with a light smirk, still trying to stay as calm as possible so no one would guess he was still turning over every detail looking for a way to change this and make it right. He knew that if any of them discovered what he was thinking, he had a very good feeling they'd try to convince him it wasn't his fault, but he knew better. He'd heard the longing in Remus' voice as he'd told this story back then, how close the friends all used to be and the only thing he could work out in his head was that it must have gone wrong when he was born.

Lily couldn't help a little bout of suspicious anger in her voice, they'd never told her of those parts of the stories, but since clearly nothing had happened or Remus probably wouldn't have forgiven himself and spoken of it so lightly, she decided now wasn't the time.

"It was our decision," Sirius scoffed, "you make it sound like you'd tied us down and forced us into it."

Remus didn't respond, and Sirius now understood how his friends had felt about him through this horrible story. He didn't like how quiet they were being, it really scared him, but he'd just have to keep trying.

"Well I praise Merlin for whatever stopped you," James said with forced happiness, putting everything he had that it must have been lingering trust that Sirius must have been up to something good, that Remus still wouldn't betray him because something was telling him he shouldn't.

James flinched like he'd been slapped, but didn't respond. He still believed his own line of thinking, as Remus was many things but never a coward. Whatever he was admitting to now was in the heat of a horrid retelling of his life, he would and should feel awful after having spent the past twelve years thinking about Sirius and so Remus would put himself in a bad light.

That caught Sirius' attention more than the others for a different reason. They all knew how much Remus cared about Dumbledore's opinion of him for this very reason, and Sirius couldn't help but flash back to the stinging realization that Dumbledore had believed him corrupt. Had Dumbledore somehow convinced Remus of this as well? He still found it kind of hard to believe Remus would believe this of him even if Sirius didn't blame him for it, but it must have taken something to make Remus see there was no other way. Why hadn't they told Remus they'd switched? There's no way James would have agreed to that, even now he trusted all three of his friends unconditionally. Did Dumbledore still have a bigger hand in this? He didn't say anything though, because he still had no proof. It was just another one of those things like Harry's first year where Dumbledore seemed to be doing something more with Harry's life, their life, then they'd ever really thought.

"That would do it," Sirius muttered aloud, and the others took his garbled tone to mean that they thought he was still thinking on Pettigrew, not now thinking on someone else so no one asked.

"Glad to see how much you regretted it," Lily muttered to herself. She knew Sirius was much more focused on other things and bringing up someone he despised wouldn't put him in any better of a mood, but he'd clearly not gotten any better about his careless comments.

Sirius hardly paid his own comment any mind now, still too lost in thought to show Lily he meant it anymore now then he had then.

"The bloody hell-" all three boys began to shout in surprise, meaning Lily had to nearly shout the final sentence.

Harry groaned and shook his head furiously, he knew he should have remembered that! Sirius though looked outraged as he spat, "pointed at Remus? Is he out of his bleeding mind! He's been there the whole f'ing time, and I'm in the room, and all he's heard was shit he already knew about Remus, but he's got his wand pointed at him! He should be looking to me, not him!"

Remus dearly wanted to laugh that his friend was pissed off he wasn't the target, it finally gave him some solid proof that Sirius didn't hate him which he still didn't even understand, but he was far too invested with worry. Snape was there, and they hadn't really explained anything! Just stuff that they already knew, Snape couldn't cut in there! Pettigrew could get away with his farce and Sirius, bloody hell Sirius could go back to Azkaban and get Kissed!

Lily was thinking exactly the same thing as she edged to her feet and shuffled over to hand the book to James. If Snape's attitude was anything to go by, then his presence was only going to make things worse in an already tense situation.


	19. THE SERVANT OF LORD VOLDEMORT

James really does get the worst chapters doesn't he? I swear I don't do it on purpose...

Warning for the longest emotional break during this where James finally has his melt down coupled in with a few other things that needed to be addressed, I don't know why I'm warning you since their reactions are the reason you're reading this, but you can't say I didn't warn you either, this one just got long.

* * *

The last thing in the world James wanted to do was pick up that book and keep going. He'd never felt so confused in his life. It just couldn't be real that Peter had been the one to do this to him, to his wife and son. Not that same boy who they'd grown up with and had more adventures and stories with then his own parents. Not that same friend who egged them along on the worst of their pranking stunts and was always willing to take the fall for them when they'd hit their quota of 'get another detention and you're going to be expelled for the month!' Not his brother who'd joined in their escapade of making sure Remus never showed up in the Hospital Wing again a breath away from death, looking so scarred and bloody that they all went out and did something illegal!

He'd been insistent, swearing up and down he'd demolish anyone who said this nonsense about Sirius, and when he was proven right about Peter he'd knock his two friends together until they couldn't see straight for even nursing the notion about his other friend. James was still adamantly refusing to acknowledge the other little details, about how if Scabbers was Peter then why would he be in hiding this long? Why wouldn't he have gone to Remus? Why the farce of being dead if he hadn't done something wrong? He really couldn't work out in his mind how Remus and Sirius could both be so wrong about seeing Peter on the map!

"Err, I've got a question," Harry asked hesitantly when it was clear his dad seemed to have been struck dumb and wasn't moving. "How ah, how did Remus even see Pettigrew on that map?" He felt horribly timid like he never had before about asking any such question, they all looked so many things, namely violent, when he said that name but he risked it anyways just to try and get his dad's attention. "Sure Hagrid's hut isn't on the map, so I suppose I wouldn't have ever seen him if he'd been there the whole time, but Fred and George didn't ever see a guy named Peter hanging around Ron either, at least they never said anything about it."*

Harry's question only seemed to have the opposite effect as his dad's lip began quivering, the ability to explain escaping him, so Remus answered, "That was a terribly tricky charm that I worked out. We put an extra layer on the map so that animagus' wouldn't be seen on the map unless you added an extra command, and I'm fairly confident the twins never figured that out. We didn't want anyone to see them in animal form obviously as they are still illegal. I of course got left out because I'm not an animagus. I most likely would have turned it on when I took it from you though, and since Hagrid's hut isn't on the map I wouldn't have noticed anything until this night."

"What about the cloak then?" Harry persisted, still throwing hopeful glances at his father in hopes he'd come back to life any second. "You could see us even when we were under that?"

"The map shows all," Sirius muttered, wishing he could do that in his old singsong voice like this was still a perfectly normal conversation, and detesting more than anything he couldn't even fake that anymore.

James at least looked like he was paying a bit more attention now, but still didn't look up to wanting to use an actual language as he gazed down at the book. Sirius had decided to take pity on him and reached for the book when James smacked his hand away and said, "Don't be stupid, it's my turn." He still hadn't worked out in his mind how this was going to be okay this time, but he wouldn't let himself cave now.

"She's not the first girl to scream at the sight of him," Sirius nodded.

'It would be that to spark life back into him' Lily thought fondly, watching James go from confused to outraged in seconds as his mind swiveled back to realizing that it hadn't ever mentioned Harry picking the cloak back up, he'd darted down after Ron straight away. Snape had used his cloak!

"I don't think I can ever touch that thing again," Sirius moaned, rubbing his hands on his knees like there was bile all over them.

"Why would he even bother though?" Remus demanded, "Sneaking in there like that, what's his reason?"

Harry remained silent, still getting a rather bad feeling for this, and it somehow circled back to Remus.

"You are not welcome," Harry muttered.

"Oh Merlin, is he going to monologue and gloat?" Sirius demanded. "I'd rather he just curse me."

James gave him an absent nudge, knowing all too well that was a real possibility and truly thinking he'd keel over now if that did happen.

Dammit," they all muttered, their minds swiveling back to Remus and realizing their original assumption had actually been right. That meant that Remus was going to transform, that they were now on a clock until those kids had to get out of there! Surely everything was going to work out though, right? All the kids would have to do was keep a hold on the rat until morning, or Merlin just run straight up to the castle now and go to Dumbledore and turn him in then. This didn't need to be a problem if they handled it right...

"So what?" Sirius growled. "Maybe he just wanted to transform in there tonight, something could have happened he just didn't feel like telling Snape every little detail about, why did he automatically suspect that something bad was going on?"

"Did you really just ask why he followed me?" Remus asked in shock. "You never got an answer for that in school, why would he be any different now?"

Sirius huffed and grumbled something, still outraged he showed up at all, tonight of all nights and ruining this! He didn't care what Lily said, if Pettigrew somehow got away with this because of Snape interfering, he'd murder her old friend as surely as his own. Judging by the closed off look on her face, he felt like he wouldn't receive too much protest.

"Jokes on him because neither of them were," Lily muttered to herself, having noted back when Harry and Hermione had first entered and noticed dust everywhere, surely that meant even Sirius hadn't, though where he had been sleeping she wasn't sure.

"Why am I not surprised he's not listening to a bleeding word," Remus grumbled, thinking Snape could keep his wand pointed on him all night if he wished so long as Sirius got what he deserved.

James released a terrible growling noise remarkably close to how Sirius sounded. That was the lowest of blows, making a crack at him like that! He didn't care how angry he was at Remus himself, those reasons still wouldn't let him ever condone anyone saying a thing like that!

It was a testament to how peeved off Remus was he didn't even flinch at the insult, his face remained black with fury that something could go wrong and that rat would get away while Snape sat around pointlessly accusing them of anything and everything he wanted to.

"Genuinely stunned he's not screaming his head off by this point," Lily muttered, as he looked really close to doing now.

"That's it, he's dead," Sirius said with the utmost sincerity, actually getting up but simply pacing around the room in agitation now. James was watching him like he wanted to get up and join, along with a couple of choice words about strangling the life out of Snape for doing that, but forced himself to remain where he was and focus on that feeling instead, he knew he'd need it later.

Lily watched him warily, not because she wanted to stop him, but because she was starting to get worried for Sirius' health. He kept flashing about on so many things that he may collapse soon from overload.

Remus just looked shocked, unable to grasp how Snape could be so foolish that he really hated in that moment Remus more than Sirius, the man who had supposedly gotten Lily killed. In his opinion this only proved Snape cared more about himself in this moment than anyone else, Snape was finally getting what he considered revenge for himself and be damned anyone else.

James nodded like that made all the sense in the world, that was the natural reaction after all, something he knew without question he'd do himself if he'd been there as well.

Which made James' mouth go cotton dry in shock and fear. It was a miracle Snape hadn't just killed the two of them already, but with Sirius' temper in these particular circumstances he wouldn't put it past him to do something stupid and elicit a real deadly curse from Snape.

"I like to think I'd win in that moment," Sirius hissed, mirroring the expression now Harry realized. "I've ten times the reasons over him."

"Well congratulations," Remus muttered, squirming around in agitation that he'd been put down so easily, that he couldn't help Sirius anymore.

Which made Remus and Sirius flinch all over again in shock and fear. They hadn't gotten around to telling Harry almost anything, if they really did have to wait any longer for Harry to hear this conversation they were sure they'd both never forgive themselves, it had been twelve years too long already.

That at least gave them a chance to breath, one of their fears being put on hold, at least he hadn't slipped away yet. Even James looked relieved, though he then realized he'd rather spend the rest of his life hearing about a fight between his friends and Snape then put the attention back on the rat in fear of whatever answers might come out of it.

"Bless Hermione," Sirius breathed, thanking whatever they had said or done to make her give them a chance. "I take back every bad thing I've said about her this year." He only acknowledge the slight irony she'd been terrified of him all year and it was now her more than Harry trying to give him the chance, but didn't linger on it long as he was too anxious to hear out the rest.

"If he calls you that one more time..." James snarled, knowing that Snape meant it in the worst way possible.

"I'll hold him down," Remus promised lightly.

"Finally a spot of insanity I don't mind hearing about," Sirius huffed.

Lily had let go of her restraints in defending her old friend only yesterday, but she felt it was several years too late. What Severus was doing now was beyond reproach, turning on yet another child for his own vindictive means. Even if she hadn't known what she did, she could never fathom screaming at Hermione the way he was.

Sirius rubbed the spot absently like that really had just happened to him, his expression still vividly saying that if he had his own wand things would be going a lot smoother for him.

"No, no you shouldn't," James ground out, "I don't want you anywhere near anybody until this is sorted out."

Sirius just shrugged, absolutely amazed at himself for even offering that instead of trying to tackle Snape to the ground and kill him like he wanted to, guess he did still have some brains in his head.

They all made a choking, rasping noise of distress and fear at that declaration. They'd spent this whole book in fear of Sirius returning there, now with the fate of his soul lingering over his head they knew they truly couldn't stand it if they found out Sirius did succumb to that when they were so close to getting what should have happened those twelve years ago.

"As if he's ever listened to you a day in his life," Remus groaned, starting to shake all over, unable to get that horrid mental image out of his mind of what could be fixing to happen to Sirius.

Sirius puffed up like he was going to give out a string of curses for that all over again, genuinely sick of hearing his friend be deferred to like some animal, but James hadn't paused so Sirius nearly missed hearing,

which made Sirius' knees buckle as he collapsed back down on the couch in shock and fear. He'd barely come to terms grasping that this was something to happen to himself, but Remus! He hadn't even done anything, he was completely innocent in every way possible...and yet everyone in the world would believe Snape over them and, and Remus could really- his attention was caught off guard as the mirror over the fireplace shattered, not that Lily seemed to notice she was screaming so loud.

He tuned back in to see that while James looked nearly as close to tears as when he'd heard his wife's last moments, he had after all nearly vomited all over again at realizing that now both of his brothers may well be losing their souls in one go, he was now a little busy putting out a fire that had erupted on the carpet while Lily was screaming "-going to kill him! What right, why the bloody hell, you haven't done an effing thing to him!"

"He doesn't know that," Remus reminded, looking remarkably calm considering his reaction to hearing the same thing to Sirius that first time, but as far as Remus was concerned he'd worked out in his head he'd take any punishment in the world, including that, if Sirius would get off this night, he more than deserved it. For now he was pacifying the couple who looked about ready to blow up the rest of the living room they were so angry at his behavior. "As far as he's concerned, not only have I been helping Sirius all year, but I deserved it back when I was fifteen and nearly killed him."

"That doesn't make this right," Harry countered back, looking as frustrated as his parents. "That shouldn't be his call to make."

Remus sighed, he wasn't going to argue the point with Harry, and while James and Lily still looked like they were going to back him up and keep at it anyways he insisted, "Well I'd still like to keep going," he gestured to the discarded book, "as I'm far more concerned with other things going on than Snape's attitude."

That jolted Sirius into looking as murderous as the other two now at that reminder. Lily still grumbled a few foul things as she waved her wand and the mirror repaired itself while James stomped over and decided he at least couldn't argue with that. His heart just wasn't in it though, as he still knew without a doubt what he'd thought before still stood, he'd rather sit and continue hearing about the rivalry between his friends and Snape then get back on topic to his friends.

Sirius and Remus brightened like little kids, beaming at Harry as they realized that even though he didn't know them and certainly didn't trust them right then, he'd still taken their side over Snape's.

Now even Remus was beginning to look offended, there was only so many times he could hear how animal like he was without letting it get to him considering how much he'd thought that of himself in his youth, but then he flashed back to the scene his family had just caused in his defense and the numerous times James and Sirius had given him the riot act for voicing such a thing and instead played peace maker as his two friends continued growling at such a thing being said.

"Oh yes you will," Lily snarled right back. "Talk to my son like that you'll get a hell of a lot worse coming to you!" Paternal instinct was rearing its head from both parents now, as they realized if Harry kept defending them he may likely end up as worse as them. As proud as they were of their boy, who was reacting like this with every reason in the world not to, Harry would resemble James so much in that moment that the two of them were genuinely afraid of what Snape could do next.

Sirius had spent more hours of his life thinking that about himself than he ever wanted to this past day, lost a whole night of sleep and had utterly lost faith in himself for thinking this exact same thing, and now that he realized how wrong he was, who really was to blame, and to have Snape throw that in his face, well let's just say that murder was starting to sound kind for what he now owed old Snivellus.

"Oh boy," all four adults muttered, though with two wildly different indications. The two parents were now visualizing that Harry was about to be attacked three years in a row by a teacher, and Snape (despite their hate and loathing for him) was more competent than the other two and could do their boy real harm when Snape realized what Harry was doing.

Remus and Sirius on the other hand were far more confident in Harry's skill, hoping dearly Harry would use any number of spells and blast this prat out the window so they could get back to far more important things.

That gave them a moment of shock, not having realized that Hermione would have reacted so fast for them either, but maybe it was more Snape yelling at Harry then for defense of the other two adults right then.

Remus and Sirius gave a great whoop of joy, thinking finally something had gone right tonight, and in Lily's opinion praising her son a little too much when it had been a joint effort but even she couldn't find it in herself to be mad after the way Snape had been behaving. She'd been so tempted to curse him herself that it took a lot of self-restraint not to join in.

They all got a gleaming moment of surprise and pride for Ron having joined in as well, but then they reflected he'd probably been more with Hermione and defending Harry from a clearly delusional Snape then for Sirius and Remus' defense, but hey they'd take whatever at this point.

"That's gratitude for ya," Harry muttered.

"He's going to remember that later," Sirius reminded, still unable to wipe a smug smirk off his face, "not that he can do anything to you, I was probably just jealous I hadn't gotten the chance."

Lily wasn't taking quite as optimistic an outlook, thinking that Harry had a few more years of being forced into Snape's presence as a teacher and how horrid he was to her son already, this would not help, but with any luck now Remus and Sirius wouldn't rest until they made sure that shouldn't be as easy.

"Least I know it was now," Harry said with sincerity, causing Sirius to grin widely at him.

"And I thank you," Remus snickered.

"You always were the polite one," Sirius guffawed, considering the circumstances and wanting to laugh all the harder, but restraining himself and mellowing out in seconds as he realized his wish had been granted, Snape had been pushed out of the way, and they were about to get back to something infinitely more important.

"Did you fall on your head when he knocked you over," Lily rolled her eyes.

"I had much greater things on my mind in that moment then going for specifics," Remus huffed, his eyes narrowing dangerously when he got right back on track with the main points of being in there, he most of all remembering those kids were on a time frame to hear what needed to be said.

James had to swallow very hard when he got that out, wanting to nod along and agree Sirius could have been wrong, but then he remembered what Remus had said, and felt himself growing all the more fearful because he still didn't have his answer for that.

Harry groaned and smacked his forehead, remembering vividly that very first chapter and how Sirius himself had made that joke he wanted to see this, and if only Harry had remembered this then he could have saved everyone a lot of trouble.

Lily wouldn't stand for letting him stew too long, giving him a loving little tweak of his nose to get his attention and reminding, "I will not sit here and let you blame yourself for a damned thing that has happened, if you'd remembered any earlier you only would have hurt yourself and we still wouldn't have understood as well without the full story."

Harry nodded and relaxed still looking as on edge as anyone else in the room because he did still blame himself for this situation occurring in the first place, but accepting that he couldn't have done anything different for now and still working on some other way to make this better.

Sirius couldn't help a jittery, slightly deranged sound that could have been a laugh. He vividly remembered thinking about how he would have been sitting in Azkaban, hating his life and very existence, and to see that picture of little old Peter like that, oh the luck and circumstances that made this happen...it also gave him his first real glimpse into one thing that had been plaguing him. He was positive he'd still be hating himself just as much in twelve years as he was now for putting trust in Peter, still blaming himself for James death because he'd been right, he had screwed up and made a terrible mistake no matter how unintentionally. He'd been in Azkaban that whole time because he deserved every second of it, but seeing that picture would have finally sparked something in him he knew he couldn't have felt otherwise. He'd escaped for revenge.

"Not sure what to say about myself I didn't see that," Remus grumbled, still kicking himself with every opportunity he hadn't worked this out, seen the same thing and put it together, anything than what he'd done, which was nothing!

"Relax Remus," Sirius grumbled, his own voice filled with its own grating tone for different reasons. It didn't yet occur to Sirius to be mad at Remus for this either, why would he pay special attention to the rat, why would he even if he had seen the picture? He'd thought he had his man, he had thought he had the whole story and it would have been so many years later it never would have crossed his mind.

James shuddered with renewed horror, mind boggling at how this could just be so simple and easy for them to work this out and discuss it, where as he was just caught on why Peter would do these things at all. He reflected that at least Sirius had twelve years to circle around every last second of this, and Remus had always been quick on the uptake, which just made James feel all the more foolish before he realized what he was thinking and wanted to kick himself now for realizing he was already thinking in past tense. Dammit, Peter deserved the chance to say his part just like Sirius, and then everything would be just fine.

Lily had still been a little floored with her own shock of realizing what Pettigrew had done to them, she hadn't yet come back to realize that the full blunt of Sirius' supposed crime had actually been done by Peter. Had he really murdered twelve innocent people, voiced the blame on Sirius, and mutilated himself, for what! She couldn't work out in her mind what on earth could have changed in this year to cause someone she'd look to as a friend to change so radically.

Lily moaned something into her hands, wishing that the age of the rat had come up at any other bleeding time, this all could have been made so much more clear to anyone who knew this was well past the normal life expectancy. All the love and care in the world shouldn't have made Scabbers double in age of what he should be, had Arthur and Molly never really considered this? It was fair they might not even know such a thing, but how long could Peter have really played this without being found out? She only nursed the slightest of comforts she'd never have to hear the answer to this, as surely all of this put enough doubt in Ron's mind that he'd hand over the rat and this could be done with.

Harry nodded, the exact same thing having come back to him now, wishing with everything in him, despite his Mom keeping a protective eye on him to do otherwise, that he had remembered this.

The others were kicking themselves, still looking back and counting up every instance of that rat being mentioned, but really how could they have guessed? Even with the answer right in front of them, they knew they never could have or would have until it was too late.

"Err, can animagus' talk to animals?" Harry asked, fairly confident that hadn't come up in McGonagall's lecture even if he had only been half paying attention.

Lily considered herself the last person who should explain, but as the boys really were otherwise occupied each looking the worst Lily had seen them her whole life she whispered an explanation, "they keep their human mind and can understand us just fine when they transform, but it's more like talking to your pet when they're animals. A lot of body language and tone." She wasn't even sure on that fact, this really wasn't her field of expertise, so she understood when Harry nodded in disappointment and still kept an eye on his dad hopefully.

Sirius really, really wanted to laugh at this. Of all the students, it had to have been Neville who'd gotten enough flack in his life without Sirius unintentionally helping, but as it really wasn't funny at all and he just wanted something other than murder to concentrate on as his best friend looked very near his breaking point, he held it in.

Harry was just impressed at how truly intelligent Crookshanks seemed to be, for him to understand that this exact piece of paper was what Sirius needed, he doubted Sirius could use any amount of body language to convey that which means Crookshanks had to have quit the ability to understand the list of words was what was needed. He was really beginning to wonder at just how smart that cat was.

'That's what made Harry believe me, or at least the start of' Sirius couldn't help but think, not really regretting it as he'd take any reason his little pup could finally look at him then the way he was now.

"How on earth could Crookshanks have explained that," Harry repeated, looking for any kind of distraction right now and purposely directing that at his father this time to get any kind of normal reaction out of him.

"Animagus can sort of understand other animals," James shrugged, trying for all the world to act like this was no big deal at all to him. "Not like, a proper conversation like this," he gestured vaguely around the room, "just, we can communicate I guess. It's not even like a parselmouth really, where we can understand each other in words, it's all a lot of body language and sensing each other's feelings and interpreting from there."

"I probably smelt blood on the cat or something, and pieced it together," Sirius muttered.

"Great choice of words there Pad's, really put him at ease that did," Remus huffed, really wishing Sirius would quit being his usual idiotic self and use his real words rather than this constant farce of painting himself to be the bad guy in his agitation to get things done.

"Which is why Sirius is no longer allowed to explain anything anymore," Lily told him pleasantly, happy to pick on Sirius the rest of her life then dwell too long on what Harry had just said.

James literally sounded like he was reading over a dead body. It was impossible, he couldn't put this together in his head, no matter how many times Remus and Sirius kept throwing these things around he'd clutch with his fingertips to that hope that Peter must have a good reason for this, and be damned anyone who was giving him a pitiful look for thinking it.

Sirius' face twisted in a whole new way, adoring every last drop of irony he was using that slimy gits wand to perform this, only hoping it didn't leave a grease stain on his hand when he was done.

Lily was rubbing her temple in agitation, thinking this was some time for her boys to be as dramatic as possible in counting down this spell. All Remus had to do was shoot the spell hours ago, when Snape had even first stepped into the room, and they could have been done with this. She'd understood the necessary reason for Harry to understand all this, but she really agreed that it could have been done with Pettigrew out in the open. Well there was nothing for it now and she cocked her head to the side and listened with a forced neutral expression trying to prepare herself for the breakdown her husband was fixing to have that they were all still coping with.

Harry remembered, back during Lockhart's class of all places, and asking about that Homorphus Charm which his dad had said he'd use to transform transfigured objects back to original form, and remembering how he'd specifically used changing an animagus as an example. Remus and Sirius at the time hadn't said the spell aloud, but Harry had no problems now working that out.

James literally couldn't picture it. He'd spent the whole of this book, any time his friends were mentioned looking any the worse for wear, he could look at them now, as they really were, for comfort. Now all he had was a memory, one that was wobbling and being twisted until he couldn't have recognized that any better, and oh he really was going to cry now wasn't he?

Something snapped. The book fell free and James pressed his hands against his ears and he felt his world crashing down around him because that wasn't the first thing he should have done! If Peter had been coerced, or tortured, or some accident had happened, he knew he would understand and forgave it, but this singular action meant Peter wanted to run! He'd done this terrible act and was now trying to hide away from the two people in the world who would understand! Peter should have begun saying at once what had happened and why he'd done it, not trying to run!

"Prongs, James I-"

"Don't touch me!" He screamed right back, shying away from whoever that was gripping his shoulder, Sirius his mind absently noted, but he was just too busy drowning. Someone was clearly ignoring him, that was Lily whispering in his ear and he kept trying to jerk away because he didn't want to deal with anyone right now. He'd tried to the very last moment and he still hated his very being for believing and accepting this even when he had no other options. His breaths were coming out in sharp little pants and he really felt like he was going to pass out any second, almost welcomed it as oblivion would be far kinder to the monstrosity he was feeling right now.

"You know he didn't mean it, he's just coming to terms, Sirius please-" Remus looked like he was physically restraining himself from grabbing hold of Sirius to make sure he didn't run for it again for a whole new reason. Sirius kept looking at his hand and away like it was some dementor skeleton, and Remus knew it was because Sirius had taken James response in all the wrong ways. Sirius was now curling himself into the corner, trying to convince himself that James hated him just as much now, but Remus had seen it. James was over there punishing himself, and nothing they could do could help right now, he had to come to terms with this himself. Their trying to convince him otherwise really would do more harm than good, as he had to decide for himself how much he still trusted Remus, so he let him be and focused on Sirius who he was not letting the same mistake happen twice, was not going to let Sirius pull away from him. "You have to know he doesn't blame you," he whispered again and again.

"I'll believe that when you do," Sirius hissed back, glaring up at him now.

Remus sat down next to him fully prepared to take whatever Sirius lashed out because he'd take anything at this point to get him to stop hating himself.

"You think I don't know you're blaming yourself over there, when you're doing the exact same thing James has been doing. You can't pull together how we've all been so wrong about him, well boo fucking hoo Remus. None of us saw this coming, and I'll not have you thinking it's your fault. It was my idea, and the rat's fault. You've nothing to do with it!" Sirius hadn't meant for that last part to come out so brutal, but he was long since past the point where screaming was making him feel better.

Remus hardly looked offended though, the opposite as he was watching Sirius curiously. "If you really think that then why are you acting like this? You know I don't hate you now, why you don't hate me I'll still argue the point because nothing should have convinced me I was so wrong about you-"

"Because I don't think it was your fault, not entirely anyways," Sirius sighed, his head curling into the crook of his elbow with his knees pinned to his chest, his eyes going vacant. Remus made to protest anyways, but Sirius kept going, "I think Dumbledore may have had a bit of a hand."

That struck Remus dumb as he watched him now with concern.

"Think about it, this happened a year from now, but Dumbledore already suspects someone in the Order, me. He's been sending you out on missions alone by yourself a lot, would it really be too difficult for him to convince you when you'd come back from one of those what had happened."

"He shouldn't have been able to," Remus said back, but there was no force to his words. Dumbledore was the man he respected the most of anyone, the first person in the wizarding world outside of his own parents to see past the monster and give the boy a real chance at life. He'd do anything for Dumbledore...and for the first time he truly accepted how real that statement was. Was it really so absurd that what Sirius was painting had happened? He'd been coming and going so frequently that the little things would have turned into horrible big things and coaxed by Dumbledore Remus really could have swallowed the worst?

Even now he was still trying to defend the man, as Dumbledore didn't know better, he wasn't all knowing and all powerful, he'd taken what had happened at face value just like everyone else at this switch up. It still didn't feel right though, not the man who'd given Snape the Death Eater a chance to work with children at school. Had neither him nor Dumbledore really not ever gone to Sirius personally, tried to get his side of the story? Dumbledore was in the Wizengamot, had he really not just looked at Sirius during the trial and realized something wasn't right? It really was killing Remus inside, the hurt that this was doomed to happen to Sirius, but looking at his friend now he solemnly vowed it wasn't going to this time. He didn't know what had happened, maybe Harry himself would never figure it out, but something had to change.

Harry stood, torn, looking at the four of them desperately and unable to do a thing. His dad had finally caved and now looked like he was passed out into Lily's shoulder, only just allowing the barest bit of comfort and still shaking. Sirius and Remus were terrified to go near him and having a whispered conversation, Harry suspected because they were blaming themselves and thinking James just didn't have faith in any of his friends anymore. Harry felt useless, and genuinely stumped as he had nothing to say to help any of them. Finally though he couldn't stand it anymore and went to sink down on his dad's other side, just trying to be there for him even if it was silently. The movement caused James to glance around at him, his glasses skewed and eyes red rimmed, but blinking sluggishly at his son caused him to glance around himself properly in confusion for the first time as he realized who was missing.

His eyes caught on the two in the corner, and they saw their James spark back in when he saw them. He kissed Lily gently, gave his son a quick ruff of his hair then stumbled over to them and sank down on the floor in front of them.

"I know dear," Lily whispered when she caught sight of her son's face. "I feel the same, but we can't really do anything for him, he had to work that out for himself. He's lucky really," she added, gazing over at the three boys talking to each other, "that he's still got such good friends. When Severus called me that, when our friendship broke apart that day, well I hadn't really made any other best friends, he'd been the only one honestly. It had alienated me for so long that I didn't really know what to do with myself for a time."

"Isn't there anything I can do," Harry insisted. "How did you get him to even..." he trailed off in confusion, even having watched the whole thing all he'd seen his mother do was insistently refuse to leave her husband's side when he'd tried everything in the world to pull away.

"James is the most loyal person I've ever met," Lily said simply. "I reminded him that I wasn't going anywhere, that Sirius and Remus, his real brothers, were doing everything in the world to right what had been done to him. It wasn't a happy thing to be reminding him of, but it worked."

Harry nodded, his eyes still flickering over to where the three were.

"I'm sorry."

Sirius made a funky noise, like he wanted to release a snort of laughter but he was too busy watching James carefully as he whispered, "that word's been tossed around a lot lately, hasn't it?"

James ignored that and watched the two of them very seriously as he continued, "I shouldn't have acted like that, said that, not to you two, it was unforgivable-"

"Think we should be the judge of that," Remus scoffed.

"We were all wrong," Sirius croaked, watching James lightly, "and we can deal with it whenever we can," he finished with a fearsome look back at that door.

James sighed, even now he didn't know what to feel towards Peter. Betrayal was the dominant emotion, still some delayed shock in there, but he had a very good idea once all that simmered out he'd come to full term and realize that it was because of Peter his wife had died, his son had been handed over like that. Peter had turned on Sirius and pinned the whole mess on him causing him a fate worse than death. He knew he should and would come to grips and he'd be right where Sirius was, but for now he was still processing.

Silently, all three boys realized at the same time they couldn't sit here forever. Harry and Lily were still trying to give them their space but were clearly wrestling with themselves about coming over to check on them as well. The book wasn't over, Harry may have discovered the worst thing in the world, but the books weren't over. Their sole reason for having even agreed to do this, to see Harry's life at school, wasn't done. They'd push through and deal with this mess in due time, but for now they went back to their spots. Lily and Harry weren't happy about the distance it caused for them to go back to the other couch, but still recognized it couldn't be helped, they had to leave what was left of the Marauders to be so they could work this out amongst themselves.

James found his place, and never before had to try harder in his life to read.

"Because they do," Remus ground out, his eyes flashing dangerously.

Lily was watching with genuine concern that James wasn't exactly reading in an intelligible way, spitting words around more than reading them at this constant reminder, but she wasn't going to argue the point either. Her husband wouldn't hand that book over to anyone, most likely feeling he had a duty and a right to finish this out.

Sirius and Remus made such a terrible noise it would have given baby Harry nightmares, which made them all the more grateful he'd never been brought back into the room for this escapade.

Harry still noted that the last thing Remus wanted to do now was talk, but he then decided Professor Lupin had wanted to get all of his facts straight before whatever happened next.

"Tried being the operative word," Sirius muttered.

"WILL YOU STOP THAT!" James snapped, turning on him and startling Sirius so badly he nearly jumped over the back of the couch to get away on instinct before his eyes focused in on James. His breaths were coming out in pants, his eyes wild and too wet, his best friend had reached his breaking point and Sirius clipped his mouth shut to stop any retaliation. He knew James might have come to terms with this now, but Sirius' picking words weren't going to help any.

"Little matters," Remus hissed under his breath, not quite understanding how he could be so calm then when he was feeling as waspish as Sirius, but keeping himself held back for James benefit now, maybe that's what he was doing for Sirius then?

Lily made an odd little face, like that should have been funny in some other part of her life at watching Peter flip Sirius off, but she couldn't find it now.

There was that anger James had been expecting, already feeling bad for having shot it at Sirius already, but his friend clearly wasn't holding a grudge on this and James forced himself to keep going.

"I don't know what you were going for, but that wasn't comforting him," Harry muttered to himself, realizing now what he was just beginning to think on then, Remus' last priority was to make Peter feel better about anything.

'And he's going to get to experience every last one of them' Sirius vowed.

Well that was...odd was a kind way to put it. James still had way too many things buzzing in him at once, number one of which was that it was laughable at best that Sirius would get within ten feet of Voldemort and not kill him, and the surreal feeling James kept having over and over that it was Peter saying these things, but also the fact that Peter hadn't called Voldemort by name. He'd always done it before, and this only served as yet another reminder he knew he'd be getting the rest of his life; that Peter wasn't who he thought he was.

James was really starting to concern the lot of them, Harry noticed he was starting to sound as deranged as Sirius had that night. Of all the chapters his dad could have gotten, fate had dropped this one in his lap, and he wasn't going to give it up until he was done just to prove to them he could keep going, but Harry feared the worst part hadn't even really come yet.

Lily felt a little shiver go up her spine in shock of what that meant, that the Death Eater's knew. Did all of them? She doubted that, probably only the very high ranking ones. How long did they know, even now? Then her mind couldn't help but flicker to one Death Eater in particular, one she never knew what to think about anymore, Severus. Did he know? That was being ridiculous she was sure, and giving him too much credit. So she'd heard the rumors he was a Death Eater, surely not that deep in. Well even if he did know then he'd still have thought the same as any other Death Eater in Sirius' 'killings' of those people, unless he knew about the Animagus part? Even then that was stretching it because Remus knew all about that and hadn't suspected a thing. It really depended on how much Pettigrew had told Voldemort...and she really didn't want to keep sitting around and thinking about this, it hurt too much to realize she was sitting around thinking about two separate people she'd once considered a friend.

'More now than I ever would have believed in my life' Remus mentally hissed, but considering how James had reacted to Sirius saying such things he didn't think he'd be received any better.

James bleakly remembered how he'd wanted to hear Peter defend himself before he'd lost all faith, but even then he never would have accepted this, if anything it only would have made him realize it all the sooner. For Peter to be trying to pin and blame all of this on Sirius, it really wasn't computing with the same boy he'd grown up knowing, James still didn't recognize the two merging into what he was reading now.

Sirius had been growling nonstop for several minutes now, giving what James was reading an even more menacing tone though they hadn't believed that was possible up till now. The three boys were beyond tired of hearing this, they didn't want to hear anymore because the more they heard the more their life felt like it was slipping away in hearing about this waste of a being they'd use to claim endless defense for.

Lily still had enough residual feeling left in her to feel the echo of stunned at how much hatred was bleeding through James, like he was standing right there and saying it to Peter's face now. He'd never sounded like this, not even when he heard about Snape's worst moments, because that was Snape, a man he'd grown up hating. This was the opposite. She still couldn't feel any pity, or remorse, nothing to indicate she would do anything to get in the way but would instead be guarding the door to make sure Peter heard every last word.

James knew he could not keep hearing about that, the little rat still trying to run even now, much longer without something else inside of him breaking. That, that, he should spend the minimum amount of time as twelve years in Azkaban for starters!

Remus had almost forgotten that Harry was watching all of this, that he and his friends were struggling along to keep up. He wanted to kick himself all over again that this was the farthest thing away from what Harry deserved, Remus still didn't think his own actions should be okayed and Harry should have heard something about this long ago.

Sirius made an almost comically horrified face as it first occurred to him that the rat had been sleeping in Ron's bed! Scabbers had spent more time with Harry then everyone in this room combined! Where was the justice in that! This may not have reached the others yet, and Sirius was pretty stuck in his own mind to point it out.

James sounded horrendous the longer he kept going, looking likely to burst into tears at any second the longer this carried on as he kept warring back and forth between the blackest of anger and realization kept striking him like lightning what he was reading. Still his first instinct was to scoff that any of his friends would hurt Harry, let alone what Sirius was saying, and then he'd flash all over again and left a mess upon realizing Sirius wasn't wrong. He couldn't even bring himself to scold Sirius, correct him and remind him of how many times Peter had taken the fall for them, done everything in the world for them like they'd done for him, only bringing up all over again that question of why? Why had Peter done this to them!?

Which made Remus realize for the first time the bleeding odds of this. Peter would have chosen the Weasley's long before they'd even known Harry's name, and for one of their kids to become Harry's friend! Ron of all of them! Even if Scabbers had fallen into the hands of say Ginny, or one of the twins, anyone but Ron he'd be a little less likely to balk at the odds of this, but he really was beginning to wonder if the world was really out to kill Harry and himself along the way!

'Hope he stays that way until I can convince Remus to make it permanent' Sirius snarled.

Harry couldn't help a startled little noise, like he wanted to laugh but the sound wasn't going to happen any time soon. He couldn't help it though, his dad reading that like he was wanting to scream the worst of curses and the remembered sound of how timid Hermione sounded coupled together gave him an honest moment of amusement.

"The only time anyone called him that was when he was in trouble," Lily nodded to herself.

James still couldn't shake memories floating to the surface, of the number of times Peter had tried to butt into James and Sirius' arguing about something and Remus silencing him with a look so they could work this out. The mockery of those moments being twisted into this decayed future still leaving him a mess.

James was circling into depression at hearing this now. He'd spent hours worrying himself sick about picturing Sirius in that place, even having realized already this was how he'd done it didn't make the realization of what he'd gone through any easier to hear; and for Peter to have been the one to put him in there, well he really didn't think he could stand going much longer...

Remus and Lily were taking turns muttering obscenities under their breath, choosing to curse the world for the picture Sirius was painting because they didn't know what else to do at this point.

For the first time since this had been mentioned, Sirius felt no fear for what his life was heading towards, instead the thought of what he now had to look forward to in taking revenge on Peter before he even had an inkling of an idea of what was coming for him kept his mind off of anything else.

Remus still bleakly wished that Sirius would have broken out at any other time before this, maybe this all would have come out so much sooner, that Sirius wouldn't have had to suffer for so long.

You know it was bad when they all bleakly remembered back to that time and they'd felt better then than now. Then they'd just been afraid for Sirius, and all the following terrible things that had been implied he'd done, and now they knew the cause of it all was one of his best friends, and it just felt like every last one of them was being broken apart inside.

Finally James began kindling something other than all-consuming anything about him. Sirius had done it, despite being so close to death, having to fight through all of that half dead, and still he'd made it all the way to Harry's side. He'd never loved his brother more than he did in this moment. He looked up to see Sirius actually smiling, an expression moments ago he'd been sure he'd never see again, but of course James was being a fool. Sirius would do everything to his last breath to protect Harry and he showed it every day. If there was one thing to get them back to a sound place, it was Harry.

Lily desperately had to fight down the urge to get to her feet and shove every last drop of food she had at Sirius. He'd basically been starving to death, there could not actually be much to eat out in that forest, not to mention dodging around practically every creature out there that wanted to kill him and use him for a snack. Of course if anyone could do it, it was Sirius. He'd spent more time in that forest then he had in the castle. It just tormented her to hear everything he'd been going through and she still had no way to help.

Sirius perked up with some interest at that, analyzing everything Harry had just heard all over again and compiling that as the reason Harry had learned to trust him, or at least this was the beginning of it.

Sirius had to fight down the urge to get up and go hug Harry. The only thing stopping him was the urging need to hear this chapter be completed, to make sure that rat wasn't going to ruin this moment for them. He'd never forgive himself if Harry finally did trust him, that they could finally start what should have been all those years ago, only for it to be torn away by him all over again.

Harry was smiling and squirming in place he looked so happy as he watched Sirius, that feeling of confusion and betrayal he'd been harboring for so long because of his thirteen year old mind set finally slipping away to be replaced by a near blissful insistence that in this one moment he'd just gotten everything he'd always wanted. Sirius was that connection to his dad he'd always craved his whole life! It was such a purely happy moment that he didn't even acknowledge that small little part of him warning he'd better treasure this now.

The other three were so happy they were near tears themselves. They'd spent so long emotionally wrung out over the fate of Sirius, and were still in no way okay over what they'd learn of this betrayal, but realizing that one key moment where Harry put his trust in Sirius again was as close to making this whole thing okay as it would ever get.

"Because it may as well be," Sirius hissed, his happiness still lingering enough he didn't look nearly as murderous as he wanted to.

James voice was now coming out in such a strained way he no longer sounded like himself, and that's how he felt about what he was reading. This wasn't the brave and stupid kid who had as a third year taken on two seventh years for revenge when they'd called James a couple of foul words for being so spoiled rotten, that he must have somehow bought his own way onto his House team.

Sirius had his eyes screwed up tight, viciously beating away that time Peter had missed a trick step and nearly falling through the floor and Sirius offering a hand to help him back up while laughing his arse off, and Peter retaliating by pushing Sirius into the trick step instead and then laughing just as hard when he in turn had to pull Sirius back out.

Remus was having a very foul argument in his head, one memory being twisted beyond recognition of that time Sirius and Peter had tag teamed him and James, trying to get them back for messing with a dozen statues and receiving a detention from McGonagall because of it, and the end result being all four of them got a detention again anyways and laughing it all off the next weekend.

Lily's mind flashed back a moment to when her and Severus had been lounging under the shade of a tree comparing their latest Potion's notes and they'd seen Remus and Sirius strolling along, having some whispered conversation long since forgotten, and the realization of how much had changed since that one small moment left her breathless. What on earth could change in the next year to make two brothers in every way but blood fall so far it took this to change them back?

Harry felt something startle inside of himself, stunned his dad had read that in such an assured tone of voice, like this was the most obvious conclusion.

What none of them really saw was the struggle tearing James apart on the inside. He still could not knock away the pudgy little first year he met his first night in the dorm who'd given him such a shy smile no one would ever dream he'd turn into a ruthless Marauder intent on breaking every school rule in the world. Now he'd turned into, into this person who had betrayed every person James could care about that he found it the most reasonable thing in the world that of course he should die because of it! Though that really was being kind as far as he was concerned, as the rat should really be locked away in Azkaban like Sirius had been for his crimes! No he wasn't trying to offer that up instead because the thought of Peter dying still did something to him...of course Azkaban was a far worse punishment than death so in fact he shouldn't feel anything, right?**

Lily was trembling all over she was so frustrated. She'd cried herself to sleep over Peter, realizing that not one of her friends had ever gotten a decent life after her and James death, the blunt reminder that Peter had died that day coming back to her at every hour last night and causing her to cry into her husband's shoulder all over again and now she couldn't bat an eye how sincere James, and no doubt Remus, was feeling at the time upon this.

Sirius pressed his hands to his ears, he didn't want to keep hearing this because he felt like every memory he ever had couldn't even be glimpsed at, this just wasn't the same Peter he knew now who had cracked a joke just days ago about how they were lucky they had each other or they all would have gone mad with how depressing the news had been of late.

Remus hadn't forgotten that little tidbit, but it only managed to remind him of the time he'd woken up in the Shrieking Shack and only Peter had been camped out on the end of his bed, looking like they always did after a sleepless night, but quickly reassuring a panicking Remus that James and Sirius were fine, they just had to head someone off who may have spotted them out the window last night. Peter had been so calm and reassuring in that moment Remus couldn't help but relax back, feeling safe that his friends had his back.

This was, pathetic. James really couldn't find any other word to use anymore, watching Peter beg for his life in this manner, the incomprehensible way he still to this very moment was refusing to live up to what he'd done, even apologize and beg forgiveness rather than his life, it was literally causing James more pain then he knew the Cruciates could ever do to him.

Whatever they'd been feeling for themselves was torn away in that one moment, outraged didn't cover how they felt when they realized who he was going to turn to next and how the thought of him being in the same room as their Harry sent them all ravenous for something far worse than murder to happen to the rat. None of them had spoken in a while now, to wrapped up in their own thoughts to even voice who agreed or disagreed what Remus and Sirius had declared they were going to do to Pettigrew, but Harry was confident in that moment he didn't think any of them would be protesting soon, making him feel all the more wrong footed as he was assessing his own feelings of that time.

James could count the number of times he'd heard that now and each one had filled him with pride that his only son carried even his faintest resemblance because it meant Harry at least had something, so that he'd never have to really question who his parents were. Now, coming from one of the handful of people he had been sure could always make him smile, James wanted to rip his tongue out of the rat's mouth for that.

"My sentiments exactly," Sirius nodded like he'd never heard a truer thing spoken.

"He clearly never actually knew you," Remus growled, not realizing that despite how much James wanted to agree with him, the words wouldn't come out. What did that say about him, even realizing how far Peter had fallen, he still couldn't bring himself to actually say the words he wanted Wormtail dead. It was like a constant battle ranging in his head wanting to pummel this blight into death because of what he'd cost him, a life with his family, wanting to protect one of his brothers to his last breath, they just weren't merging in his head into one person and one solution.

Remus started tugging restlessly on his sleeve, the only time he'd ever seen Peter cry had been when he'd received the news that his girlfriend had died over a holiday break, the dark mark hanging above her house in their seventh year, and looking back on it now he couldn't help but wonder when was the moment Peter's allegiance had changed.

James mind flickered back to when he'd been begging to hear Peter say this, and maybe if this had been the first thing he'd said he would have forever defended Peter, but as this was the very last line in a long string of things he'd done this night to explain away what he'd done, James had never felt more disgusted in his life at the explanation.

The question of why, why on earth had he done this to them, would forever plague them the rest of their life. Had it really been something so basically human? Fear had been known to drive people to do crazy things to save themselves, but the three Marauders couldn't fathom why Peter had fallen for this. Didn't he know they would have done anything to protect him? Hadn't he trusted that they could get through this together?

Sirius felt the worst pain in the world tearing him apart inside, as his instant rebuttal wanted to be that they would have done anything to stop that from happening. Instead he forced himself on the much more important question of time, and when a Death Eater had approached the rat and when Peter had caved and thrown away his past life in favor of his own skin. He'd just screamed it had been happening at least a year before Halloween, it could possibly be happening right this second and he couldn't do a thing about it.

That was the last straw, James realized he couldn't do this anymore when he'd screamed that right from his heart and realized how true it was to him, that he still meant it, and it clearly meant nothing to Peter. He threw the book as hard as he could and didn't even register it smashing into the wall so badly the spine broke and pages scattered and he was just sitting there, shaking his head from side to side. Out of tears, out of emotion, he just sat there.

Remus and Sirius weren't giving in this time, James looked sick as a corpse and still Sirius had hold of his elbow, whispering something in his ear, and Remus had his arm tossed around him and was now fidgeting with his wand instead like he wanted to curse the whole world. They all looked completely at their end, but they weren't moving away from each other.

Harry had plenty of practice from watching now, and had no problems pulling out his wand and repairing the book, watching the pages seamlessly merge back together and then continuing on pure instinct and silently summoning it back to him. He ran his hand over the hardcover, leaning his full weight into his mother who was freely crying herself now and looking at no one. He'd never felt more empty and helpless in his life, had nothing to compare the feeling to either because he'd never had such good friends before he could call them family, and even at his worst fights with Hermione and Ron they'd never done anything to each other like this. He sat there probing gently and came to the conclusion that he was still strong friends with both to this day. Harry knew that he needed to keep going though, that closure was the only thing that could begin to help them to whatever this story's end.

All three boys closed their eyes and braced themselves, in far too much of a wreck to even analyze if this is what should have happened, if they could live with themselves knowing this is what they had every intention of doing. It had never even crossed their minds to consider this before, if one of their own betrayed them what would they do? James had made the joke he wanted nothing more than to hear about his best friends murdering the person who had done this to them, and now he was, and it was too much to think on at one single time. They all missed the look that flashed over Harry's face as he read that.

That was literally the most stunning, and last, thing any of them had been expecting. A chapter ago Harry had been fully intent on murdering Sirius for this very fact, then he turned around and did this? Then again, Harry hadn't gone through with it. They'd praised that he'd lost his nerve at the fact, but now couldn't help but wonder if it was something more.

Harry was a good person, despite everything he'd been through and that horrid upbringing trying to make him the opposite, all he'd ever shown were the qualities of kindness. So really, Harry's act in this one moment shouldn't have really surprised them, and yet they all felt like taking a breathless step back.

War was a time where you killed in the heat of the moment and a spark on the battlefield was something to be considered only later over a strong drink, what Peter had done to them was the definition of betrayal and their upbringing and mindset had taught them that what Remus and Sirius had planned on doing because of it was the natural reaction, but it took this second for them to realize they'd never want the same thing to be on Harry. Not their innocent little baby, and not the man in front of them who was now eyeing his father, his face torn between horrified he'd made the wrong decision at his parents' wishes, and yet set all the same in saying he'd make it again.

"Oh Harry," Lily whispered, reaching over and planting a kiss on his temple in praise, running her nails through his hair and promising him he'd made the right decision.

James had to wriggle himself free of his friends, but then he went over and sat on the arm of the sofa, wrapping a sincere arm around his son as he vowed, "I'd back any play you make son. You're right of course," he half turned and gave the two a wink before continuing, "I think you ought to go over there and tear them a new one."

Both boys tried to look offended, but it was so good to hear any form of comedy back in the room they couldn't hold the expressions long. It didn't change what they were really feeling, both silently agreeing they'd probably still like the chance to at least see that rat be Kissed, and while James and Lily may have agreed they all knew it was something that they didn't want Harry near.

Harry was stunned that they were making the attempt, but then he reflected back on every other bad situation he'd seen them in. They'd passed through the emotions until they hit their breaking point, then they cracked a joke. It was probably something like their coping mechanism, their way of convincing themselves that the world would go on.

With his parents on either side of him, he felt no qualms whatsoever to continue.

Harry may have shown mercy, but it didn't make his tone any less chilling as he ground that out. He was well aware what he was defending, what he'd lost because of this man, but with his parents on either side of him right now he still held true it wasn't right.

"First time he's been honest this whole damn bit," Sirius grumbled to himself, wishing this part was over already, wanting to move past this and not go back until he could get a real solid answer here and now rather than hearing about his little pup having to go through all this.

James couldn't really meet his son's eyes right then, fairly angry at himself for not having realized sooner what Harry would think of this situation, putting his own feelings first and clearly needing more practice at this dad thing then just mildly teasing and giving his son random advice, plus it hurt all the more at the sharp reminder his son was technically the same age as him. Harry was right of course, he would never want Remus and Sirius to actually murder someone in his name, no matter the cause. He was clearly being too emotional and he needed to work on that, but his son was sitting at his side now, a proper man despite James never having a say in his life, so at least not everything had turned out for the worst.

Remus found Sirius' insistence well called for, James and Lily may have paid the ultimate price for this but Sirius had been the one to take the fall, but now that he was the slightest bit calmer he did hope Sirius wouldn't argue with him too much, Harry had been victim as well and he now realized just how wrong his actions were and even if they had carried through on that threat they never should have done it in front of the children.

Harry frowned in confusion at that though, asking, "Why wouldn't you just stun him? Or is there a way you could have forced him to turn back into a rat, easier to carry."

"That Homorphus Charm we used would still be in effect" Remus sighed with distaste. "No spell would affect him physically until that last one wore off, and no, there is no way to force an animagus to assume animal form."

Harry nodded in understanding, but still couldn't quite erase the frown on his face. He had a really bad feeling about leaving Pettigrew like this.

That wasn't making Harry's feeling any better, he was getting a mounting sense of impending doom, like he was going to regret his decision before this night was over, but he kept kicking that out of the way, surely he was just doubting himself because of how angry he still was.

Lily desperately hoped with everything she had that it wouldn't come to that, that Peter would have just one moment left of the man she knew and let himself be turned in to at least right the wrong he'd done Sirius. If he escaped afterwards then be damned his soul and whatever punishment he suffered for it, but please just let this be done with Harry and Sirius for now.

"And he's not stupid enough to try," James added on.

All five of them gave genuine smiles for that, happy that whatever initial problems Ron had with Remus seemed to be gone at least for the moment as he showed gratitude without any more fear of being near him.

"I disagree," Sirius grumbled, "he's touched in the head, and I probably did help."

Remus rolled his eyes, but it wasn't the worst joke he'd heard from him, in fact he even wondered if he'd done that for his friend for old time's sake, so he let it slide this time.

James couldn't help but crack up giggling. He probably sounded slightly hysterical, he knew he felt it after everything he'd just felt in this past chapter, but the idea of what they'd done to Snape was pleasant enough and he'd cling to that for as long as he could.

Harry couldn't help a little grimace at that mental image he now remembered all too well, he didn't care how much he disliked Snape, that had just been creepy.

"What, no! Am I insane," Remus yelped, going ramrod straight and wild eyed in seconds. Sirius looked at him in concern, fixing to ask what the big deal was and worried that someone had finally lost it for good in this room when he kept going, "How close to peak of the full moon was it? Snape was only there because I'm going to change, without any of that potion!"

And here they'd almost been getting back to a decent place in the room, now they all looked like they'd been petrified when they realized what he meant. How long had they been in the Shrieking Shack? It had been sundown when they'd gone in, but between the constant stops and starts of their own reading they had no idea how long the kids had been in there. When the moon reached full Remus would transform and those kids would be in terrible danger.

Harry couldn't help it, he tried to ignore it because for the first time he didn't want that settling feeling back, but he couldn't ignore it no matter how much he wanted to. Something in him was warning he should take Remus' threat very seriously, and desperately wished Professor Lupin had thought of it then. Why hadn't he thought of this then? Most likely because Lupin's main concern more than anything would be to get Pettigrew up to Dumbledore, his sole purpose would be to see Sirius' name cleared and he wouldn't be thinking of anything else in the world until then.

They prayed that they were just being paranoid, that they'd all get back up to the school to Dumbledore and things would be properly sorted out, Merlin even if they had to make a side stop to get that potion from Remus' office before they did, they'd settle for anything at this point. When no one answered though, because none of them knew one little bit obviously, Harry decided he should just keep going.

"Can't blame him one little bit," Sirius nodded with a set look in place.

Harry closed the book to show that this one was finally done, still eyeing each of his family with true worry that this had been too much for them. After everything Harry had been through, they'd all gotten through it because he was sitting right here healthy and alive, but this wasn't just some 'he almost got killed' moment. No, this was the most personal thing he could have ever discovered, and he was still trying to figure out how it was his fault. He was so lost in thought that at first he didn't notice Sirius lighting up like Christmas as he cheered "do you know what this means!"

He'd been so lost in thought, going over every bad possible thing that could happen all because of that foul little rat getting away for any number of things, but when he'd glanced up and seen how worried Harry looked he'd casted his mind around for something else and landed on the best thing possible. While the others glanced at him for his outburst, Sirius couldn't hide the glee in his voice one little bit as he declared, "Harry's going to get away from those Dursleys, because I'm going to adopt him."

* * *

Peter begging like that was literally the most degrading thing I've ever read in my life. I know this is the basis for a lot of people's opinions on Peter, and while I detest it in the worst way possible as he should at least have the gall to admit to what he did and then run rather than that, I'd still like to point out that this was a Marauder. There is no way I can ever imagine any of the others putting up with such a sniveling little thing in their youth, Peter had to be a different person and fear changed him into what he was in that scene. I have seen JK say that James and Sirius only let Peter be friends with them in a cynical way, but that doesn't make sense in a long standing point. Maybe it had even started that way, but there's no way they would have gone out and done illegal Animagus stuff, including him in the making of their map, trusted him in the Order and with the Potter's life if they'd really thought so little of him. Hope I didn't earn too many flames for my opinion on this chapter.

Also, fun fact about me, favorite chapter of the entire series. Still no actual reason I'm sharing this with you.

*JK Rowling's official response to that question is, that even if they had seen Peter Pettigrew on the map, why would they care? The story of Sirius' friends wasn't widely known to the public as Fudge had said, so why would they think anything of the name? The only problem with this though, and I never found another answer from her, is in the dorms. Surely they would have seen his name mashed in with Ron's at any stinking time and as I said, never once questioned Ron about it? He only hung out with two kids on a regular basis, and never once mentioned a Peter? I know they didn't sit around and have in depth discussions with their brother about his friends, but I still find that really hard to swallow. Hope my answer wasn't too out there.

**Since we know virtually nothing about James, what he would have canonically felt about this moment we will never know, so I based this on how I would have felt if I'd learned all of this. I'm sorry if you disagree, if you'd like to discuss it I'd be more than happy to hear some other opinions.


	20. THE DEMENTOR'S KISS

I love the parallels these books have with their chapter titles. Like the last one with Dobby's Warning and Dobby's Reward, and this one with The Dementor, and The Dementor's Kiss, plus Owl Post and Owl Post Again. Random thing to point out...

* * *

Lily looked like she could get up and kiss him at that kind of news! While it would never not sting to forever realize she wasn't going to be there for her boy, the fact that he had Sirius for him there now was the best second thing she could hope for! She was the only one who had really registered the news though.

Remus was still lost in thought, kicking himself into a grave and getting cold all over because he had seen that look Harry had given him at his exclamation, and he knew quite well what it meant. Even though Harry couldn't say it out loud, Remus would never forgive himself if the rat really did get away because of him.

James looked like he wanted to be happy, he tried for the feeling, and it was certainly there on the level Sirius was suggesting, but something was holding him back. Of course he was ecstatic, he'd do anything in the world for Harry to get away from the Dursleys. Sirius would do a great job taking care of Harry...so why did he feel something foreign and not at all pleasant at the thought?

Sirius clearly didn't notice as Harry tossed him the book, he looked more than happy to take it, looking like he'd sing it to the heavens the justice and triumph he was feeling, but was cut off by Lily.

Lily was shocked that she was the one to notice the time, and deciding to linger on whatever good mood this would afford them for as long as possible, she offered, "why don't we eat."

The boys looked scandalized, and some private part of Lily would have laughed at this, but she insisted her point, "I want to see him being turned in as much as anyone, but it's about time for the baby's lunch, and I'd rather pause now when we've got some good timing."

They didn't look happy, but no one argued the point either. The boys ate probably the lightest lunch they'd ever had in their life, food was the last thing on their mind after everything they'd just lived through, but forced down a bit each to at least get rid of some of Lily's worry lines. No one brought up Remus' condition again, it was a sore enough subject already and they would just have to deal with it after this nightmare book was done, there couldn't be too much left.

The baby was fed and then put back in his playpen for a while longer, none of them wanted him in the room so long as the rat was going to be mentioned. Sirius went back and picked up the book and properly got to reading, still forcing a light feeling into his voice at what he wanted to hear, rather than the worry lingering he knew they all felt.

Sirius still adored every last drop of irony reading that caused him.

Lily wanted to roll her eyes at this childish display, but after everything they'd just gone through she couldn't even find it in herself to do that as all four boys gave little snickers at that mental image.

"It's not going to be much fun if you point it out every few minutes," James mumbled, and while Sirius gave him a confused look for how odd James sounded, he put it down to any lingering feelings he had about bringing up the rats name. He didn't feel much better, but knew he'd chant that putrid name for an hour if it would get Harry out of the Dursleys.

"Well no one ever technically told me, I just sort of found out," Harry couldn't help but give a little smirk, happy to see everyone did the same back. Maybe he was just being paranoid, surely nothing too bad was going to ruin this mood again so soon.

Harry laughed, but he was the only one who did. It was such a ludicrous sentence that he found it the appropriate reaction, but the others were still so foul tempered about everything that they half wished before Sirius properly took Harry in he'd make a visit to those Dursleys and show a bit more of that violent edge he'd displayed.

Remus couldn't help but burst out laughing now when he realized Sirius had only known Harry for five minutes, and this was the first real question he asked him! It was made all the funnier under these circumstances, but he sobered out very quickly as he vividly remembered that his own self may prevent this and more from happening.

Sirius couldn't help a snort of amusement, he knew he understood now far better than he would have then Harry's reaction to this.

Which gave them all a good laugh. Harry had only learned five minutes ago that Sirius wasn't some insane murderer intent on killing him, but it became all the more depressing when they realized just how bad Harry's life there must really be if he instantly said yes to the first person who offered.

Harry had a goofy smile on his face, he looked as pleased as anyone at this prospect and clung to the image already forming in his head desperately, refusing to admit that he wasn't getting any real feelings about this becoming true. He also wouldn't meet anyone's eyes right then, the last thing he wanted was for someone to ask for details about why he was so eager to get out of there.

That set them into giggling maniacs all over again, they wanted more than anything to spend the next set of years listening to Harry's life like this with no concerns about the Dursleys, which with any luck Harry may well confide about to Sirius.

James blanched, he still couldn't picture that, didn't want to. He glanced at his brother's face now and saw him beaming with pride and it looked the most natural thing in the world, he just couldn't understand how ten years would make him hardly recognizable...and he just kept remembering whose fault it was.

Sirius hadn't believed it possible, but he only read that with three quarters amount of hatred rather than all consuming. He was still too busy happily picturing in his head he and Harry getting to have all the moments properly in the future like they were right now.

Lily cracked up laughing hardest of all, they all remembered making jokes about wanting that convict to come make a visit to those Dursleys, and now their wish was coming true in the best way possible!

Sirius refused to acknowledge what that could mean, though he more than anyone should know better. He just couldn't do it though, not now! Timing must be on their side, just this once, that the full moon wouldn't peak and Remus would...

Remus went rigid at once, his face going an almost scary white, coupled with just how terrible he looked since he was going to transform this night he looked likely to keel over any second.

James and Sirius couldn't stand that, James going back over to his friend and sitting down on his side to put him in-between him and Sirius as he comforted, "hey, relax Moony, we're all do for a bit of good luck, I'm sure nothing happens."

Remus either couldn't, or wouldn't answer, flapping his hand and silently demanding Sirius go on so he could get his real answer.

Remus began hyperventilating at once, he'd been so stressed for so long that this really was too much. He couldn't see anything, couldn't make out any words, his nightmare was coming to life and oh he was well aware it was going to happen again tonight and he was probably going to kill Lily and Harry then, just like he probably killed everyone out there that night as well...

"James, we have to do something," Lily tried desperately to keep her voice from shrieking levels as she danced in place watching Remus shake all over, looking like he had fallen into a seizure and clearly not aware of anything. "He's going to hurt himself!" She felt so useless and desperate she may well be heading towards her own panic attack soon.

Sirius tried to say in an analytical tone of voice, rather than how frustrated he felt he couldn't seem to get through to Remus, "most likely he'll pass out here in a few minutes from oxygen deprivation."

"That's not helping," James ground out, trying to ignore the fact that Remus was folding in on himself and would have long since face planted the table if James wasn't holding onto him.

"Couldn't you use that potion on him, the one you used on me earlier to make me relax," Harry tried, not wanting to wait for a response and go get it now, but he wasn't sure where it was.

"Wouldn't work on him," Lily moaned, logic nearly lost as it was taking everything in her not to do something similar.

James and Sirius were still alternating back and forth trying to calm him down in smooth, reassuring tones. Sadly this wasn't even the first time they'd seen this happen to him, he'd acted like this a few times when he'd first woken up and seen how badly he'd harmed them when they'd first began their monthly transformations with him. Despite their scholarly research, it had taken them ages to convince him his bites wouldn't harm them so long as they were animals, and even then he was left gasping and guilt ridden at how deep some of their scars were. The only thing that ever worked in breaking him out of these was just to let him wear it out, keep talking to him and remind him it wasn't that bad, and try to keep the blood out of sight.

This time all of that was a little harder to pull off, because of how worried they were for the kids. Harry clearly hadn't been bitten, but what about Ron or Hermione? Ron was literally chained up to Remus, without a leg to run on, but Moony would break out of those in seconds and turn on either him or the rat. It would be true irony indeed if the second were to happen, and the rat lost his life to Moony, but for now they were more concerned with convincing him he wasn't going to hurt anyone.

Finally Sirius' prediction seemed to have come true, Remus slumped completely as he lost the fight for air, but he seemed to snap out of it quick enough as he jacked back upright and crashed into Sirius' nose.

"Ouch," Sirius grumbled, rubbing at the spot and grumbling this was a terrible time to be paying him back for that, but one wild look around and Remus realized what was happening and he nearly started all over again.

"Wait, Remus please, calm down," Lily quickly jumped in, trying to catch his eye. "No bites, see you didn't attack him-"

"Or anyone," Harry quickly added on, before hissing in pain as white spots flashed across his eyes for remembering that too soon.

That one little action gave Remus a shot of here and now, seeing Harry in pain was as vivid a reminder as he could get, but it was the comfort he needed. He trusted his friends, and Sirius and James were going to be there for him tonight to make sure he never did this, and Sirius was even there for him then to make sure of the same thing.

It didn't seem to help for long though, as almost at once he began having another spaz attack.

"Moony," Sirius groaned, he'd seen him relax for an actual second and they'd been sure he'd calmed down, what had made him relapse?

"Sirius, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, glory if I actually-" Remus had his eyes screwed tight shut and kept shaking his head back and forth, intermittently muttering, "I am going to kill him" in between apologizing.

It took a moment for the others to catch up and realize why he'd be doing this, and then Sirius gripped his arm so hard there was likely to be a bruise as he hissed, "you don't get to blame yourself for one second for whatever that rat does. If he makes a run for it, Merlin help it, if he gets away, it is not your fault. You couldn't have stopped him then anymore then you could stop him all those years ago from deciding to become an animagus. I hung back to talk to Harry, but Hermione couldn't have done it either, there should have been one of us up there covering him. You don't get to blame yourself for anything he does."

Remus still looked miserable, so they couldn't decide how much of that he'd taken to heart, but he didn't look like he was going to argue the point, so that had to count for something, right?

They didn't really want to at this point, just so sick and tired of everything that could go wrong would, but them hearing about it wasn't going to change what did happen. Harry lived through it, and that was the most important thing to all of them, so despite the fact that Remus wanted to curl up into a hole and never come out, he didn't protest either as James and Sirius convinced Lily and Harry to sit back down so Sirius could find out what really happened.

"Least someone admits it," Remus huffed, never understanding how these two, well four he corrected, could still defend him and stand by him even at his worst moments.

He received a very sharp smack from James having heard that, giving him a threatening look to make it clear he'd do worse if Remus didn't cut out the comments about himself. Neither he nor Sirius were delusional in thinking Remus wasn't dangerous at those times, but he wasn't this unbearable monster either like he tried to paint himself.

Harry's face was set now, fully saying he wasn't going anywhere when Ron was in danger, which gave them all yet another warm flood of happiness when they remembered all over again what good friends, pretty much family, those three were, and felt a terrible wince all over again when they couldn't say the same for their whole family anymore. They all really hoped this wouldn't start showing up every single time now, desperately hoping they could come to grips and the rat's betrayal would stop coming to mind every five seconds soon.

Remus was still curling into himself in shame and disgust, he'd never had his transformations explained to him in such vivid detail and he just couldn't stand how calm Sirius was forcing himself to sound about it. How was he not disgusted, afraid, he'd been asking himself that his whole life and knew he could never understand when talking about a real life monster.

Harry couldn't help but startle in remembered horror at these two doing this to each other. He'd only seen once before two street cats fighting in an alley, but even that hadn't been as brutal as when these two beasts went at it. He'd heard the term fur flying but never before had he understood how bad that could be, watching the literal flesh be pulled off of each other as at least one of them would have gone for a mortal blow.

Lily couldn't help but shrink into Harry, just a little bit. For obvious reasons she'd never been near Remus during this time, and her boys had never gone into such detail of how violent these nights could get. It certainly explained why more times than she could count the Marauders would show up with more than just Quidditch injuries, but no one had ever questioned it too deeply because of all the insane things they got up to. She regretted the action at once when she saw Remus flinch like she'd slapped him, and she wanted to apologize and insist she didn't mean it, it had just been shock, but Sirius hadn't noticed a thing and seemed determined not to stop until he got his answer of what happened to the rat during this mess. She still determined the second this was over she would have a proper talk with him, all three of these boys needed it.

Remus was trying to get away from his two friends, trying to go back to his own corner of the room or something because he couldn't stand just sitting here and listening to not only taking a bite out of Sirius but how it was unarguably his damned fault that rat really was going to get away now!

Neither of them were still having it though, Sirius was multitasking by digging his elbow into Remus' ribs and reading loudly, trying to get to the part already where hopefully Harry came to his senses and tried to pin down the rat long enough the spell would wear off and he could be stunned again.

James now practically had Remus pinned to his side, all earlier anger at him forgotten and to be dealt with later. His annoyance Remus had turned on Sirius so easily was nothing compared to what Peter had done to him, and he was far more concerned now making sure Remus knew he could look past it, he would make amends to both of his brothers and keep them going just like they did for him every day in this unforgiving war.

Harry swore violently, making a move like he wanted to go for his own wand for anyone cursing his friend! His only comfort which he quickly told the others was that it had been a flash of red light, he'd only been stunned.

"Was the cat really necessary," Sirius grumbled to himself.

"No, no, no, no!" They all kept muttering in varying levels of hatred and shock. They still couldn't understand how he could do this to them, to Sirius! He was really running again, leaving Sirius in that exact same circumstance, leaving Harry to deal with an angry werewolf...just leaving like it meant nothing to him.

Sirius was only reading on autopilot now, he couldn't even find it in himself anymore to feel hopeful something good still worked itself out, just wanting to finish this already whatever the answer. He knew Remus was fine because Sirius wouldn't let him attack anyone, Moony would be his priority and he'd let the rat escape, and he couldn't bring it in himself to resent it. He cared more for Remus' sound mind when he came out of this then his own revenge, finally making the right decision. If he'd tracked down the rat once, he would do it again, now with Remus' help.

Remus sighed in relief, not caring whatever he'd heard to drag him away, just thankful it was getting him away from Harry and those innocent kids. He wasn't nearly so forgiving of his actions this night, he'd hate himself no matter when the rat was recaught because he'd gotten away this time because of his own stupid, useless, life.

Sirius hardly sounded like he cared, he'd survived Azkaban for cripes sake, a couple of scratches shouldn't faze him for long.

Remus didn't hold nearly the same feelings at the news, but reflected it wasn't the worst thing he'd done to his friend recently.

James released a violent noise, like he wanted to laugh about that all over again, but couldn't grasp the emotion, he was too caught up on other things. Lingering hatred and annoyance still clung in there as well at Snape even being there, he'd done nothing useful this whole night except to wrongly attack the friends he shouldn't be.

Remus made a pretty good attempt at that sound now, thinking he'd gone back around and went for Padfoot again. The others didn't really agree, but trying to think up something else that would attack Sirius right now wasn't pleasant either. Had he chased the rat into the Forest or something?

Harry felt so bad for all of them he asked the first question that came to mind, "Why didn't he just leave the grounds in the first place, why did he hide out at Hagrid's?"

No one needed to ask which he Harry meant, as Harry realized it was hard enough hearing the name whenever it popped up in the book now.

James didn't really want to sit around and think about these things, but he wasn't going to deny his son either. "He was probably hoping Sirius would get caught again, and he could make a miraculous return to Ron, why leave his cushy life if he didn't have to." The terrible bitterness coloring his every syllable left no one wanting to add on further.

Sirius couldn't help a little bubbling of warmth, that Harry was already running off to help him like that, though he knew he didn't really want Harry anywhere near what was going on between him and the rodent.

Lily nearly screamed again, the sound was certainly trying to build up in her throat but kept getting lodged there. She couldn't help it though, she just wanted to scream as loud as she could 'no!' Over and over again until someone proved her wrong this wasn't about to happen! Not to Sirius, he'd been through so much already, he didn't deserve this!

Sirius either didn't notice, or didn't register why the others would be freaking out. Maybe he was still too intent on reading about catching the rat, maybe he was forcing his own denial, either way he kept going.

There was a horrible beat of silence where Sirius froze up, trying to understand why he would do that, but he wouldn't let it last long, blinking past suddenly blurry vision to force out.

"Why!" Harry yelped clearly startling them all badly, they'd each frozen up and gone into lockdown, strangled breathing a kind description, fear was doing so much to them, but Harry cracked and let out a stream of questions, "why did you change back! Why didn't you keep running? Why would you collapse, you've had years of being around them and you do this now!" His voice kept rising, anger bleeding into his tone, but as Sirius watched him he recognized it wasn't the actual rage at him, but for what Harry was well aware was fixing to happen to him. "Why didn't you just use a Patronus, surely you still had Snape's wand! Why-" he finally strangled himself off, just watching Sirius desperately. He somehow just knew that Sirius was in trouble, that he needed to save him, something went terribly wrong...

"Harry!" Lily finally got out, wanting to scold, but he just looked so desperate she couldn't find the right tone, she was more concerned than ever something really was fixing to happen to Sirius! The worst part was no one could find it in themselves to say anything. Harry's reaction really did lead them all to believe that Sirius was about to be Kissed, and they really couldn't stand that. Not after everything they just went through, getting the truth and then having it smashed down on their lives, they could not deal with the fact that Sirius would still take the fall in the end, leaving Harry like that.

They were all out of anger, they'd spent it out on the rat. Now they were just left feeling empty, scared, and desperate.

Harry couldn't help it though, hadn't even realized how loudly he'd been shouting because his wide green eyes just kept watching Sirius with horror and he knew he didn't want to lose him again!

Sirius was the first to come out of his shock, watching his little pup like that wrenched at every part of him and he'd do anything to get rid of that look, so he blurted out answers to his abundant questions, just for everyone else to hear him talk now, just so he could prove to himself he was still alive even if this was the last thing in the world he wanted to talk about. "I'm no expert on dementors, but I can tell you now that years of being around them only would have decreased my ability to fight them off, not the other way around. The shock of having been away from them for so many months, and then forced back around even one, would have shocked me so bad I'm not surprised if I lost my hold on being Padfoot and reverted." The silence continued, so he just kept talking, trying to fill a void that kept lingering in the room.

"Same reason I wouldn't have been able to produce a Patronus again, or kept running, or anything. It was probably a lot of shock. Not to mention if they really are there to Ki-" he stuttered out, even he couldn't say that with a straight face, but since they all knew what he meant he kept going in a forced relaxed voice like talking about his imminent death was Sunday brunch, "well that's two different things. A dementor gives off a powerful aura, their natural state is what causes the depression most people feel, but when they're set on doing, err, that other thing, it becomes ten times more powerful. Even I never would have been around that. Not to mention the realization that the rat escaped would have put me at an all-time low," he finished, unable to keep the sour filled disgust out of that last part.

Remus snapped first, pulling him into a tight hug despite Sirius' protest and grumbling, "would you let me go! I'm not dead yet, so quit acting like you're staring at my funeral! And if you even start apologizing, any of you, I will personally set out to make every last serious and dog pun in the world!"

"Padfoot that's just cruel," James whimpered, running his hand furiously against his eyes and unable to put any real emotion into his voice.

Sirius finally managed to wrestle himself away from Remus, giving the others a warning look in case they planned on doing the same. "Now I am going to finish this, and, and Harry's fine so that's-"

"That doesn't make this okay," Harry growled, still shaking terribly and looking ready to keep screaming any second. Maybe not at his godfather, but at something about all this injustice.

"You," Lily snapped, moving with lightning speed and snatching the book away, "are not reading that! None of you are."

"So glad you can," Sirius grumbled, not expecting Lily to smack him over the head with the book. "Ouch, what was that for!"

"Because you deserved it," Lily snapped right back, taking his momentary distraction at him rubbing his head to dash back to her seat and try to read, hoping that she could continue to smack him for fifty years to come, hoping that her doing this would distract him for the next seven books...and starting to run out of hope.

Well that distraction lasted all of six bleeding words! A hundred! It's no wonder Sirius had such a reaction! She really was doubting even she could do this. Hadn't they all suffered enough? Harry had heard both her and James' death, he'd had his life destroyed by one of James old friends, Remus had tried to attack him this night, and now Sirius was going to die! She still hadn't fully wrapped her head around the rat's betrayal, she'd accepted it, but she hadn't had time to process and think. She knew she was still in shock when she could think the words 'Sirius would no longer be around' and not burst into endless tears. All of this had come out in less than a year to Harry, less than two days for them, and she really wasn't sure how she could keep doing this. Then Harry wrapped an arm around her, his live warmth cutting through the worst of the cold and dread, and though she forced herself to keep going as fast as possible, like hearing the words slurring together would make it less painful to hear, she kept glancing up every other word to find the three boys huddled into each other. Still alive, still breathing, still here with her.

Sirius couldn't help a little jolt of shock. He was already Harry's happy memory? He remembered back to Harry choosing to leave the Dursleys and come to Hogwarts had produced his best Patronus, until that game where he'd summoned one, even around those fakes, and adrenaline and his love for the game had caused something even more substantial. Now Harry was trying to project another one in his defense, using him and his promise...and it wasn't going to be enough. Glory no wonder the kid had reacted so badly, he must blame himself! It was a miracle Harry and Hermione had even survived this night, dementors weren't known for their discretion. He was now just thanking his lucky stars Harry and Hermione hadn't been Kissed as well!

Then Sirius really looked at Harry, and realized he was actually crying now. He met Sirius' eyes for a second, then he got up and tried to storm away. Sirius pounced at once, grabbing his shoulder and trying to turn him back, and though he did turn back and face him he still screamed, "I could have saved you! You shouldn't have been there, you only were because of me!"

Sirius wasn't having that, growling right back, "you shut that trap kid. You don't get to feel guilty about this, the patronus just wasn't in your capability yet, nothing could have been done. I would have tracked that rat anywhere in the world and then come looking for you, this is his fault, not yours."

Harry couldn't help but wobble then, wondering what about that felt off... he lost it.

Sirius saw the indecision though, the hesitancy, so he kept going. "You were a thirteen year old kid, it was my job, my responsibility, my decision, and his fault. The world's a damned cruel place you had to watch this, but I'll stand here blue in the face till you realize this is Siriusly my problem."

Harry couldn't help it, that was so random he cracked and let out a weak little chuckle.

Looking quite pleased with himself, he nudged Harry back to his mother's side and soothed the room at large now, "that go's for all of you. You can cry at my funeral, so long as you make sure to get my best picture up there."

James' hand twitched, like he wanted to smack the living daylights out of Sirius for actually making jokes at a time like this, but he supposed it was all what they needed. Watching his brother use his vanity and name at a time like this was just so, Sirius. It gave them a shot of fresh air that what they kept reading was not set in stone. Harry must have come back to this time and place for a reason, they must be able to fix this!

Sirius took back his spot, except now in between his friends again, and eyed Lily expectantly. She shook her head at him, a look Sirius had seen practically his whole life of Lily Evans, well Potter now but that wasn't the point, exasperated at the Marauders and everything they did, but it was better than that dead eyed look of loss she'd held seconds ago. Sirius would ignore his own feelings on the matter, and keep babbling all he wanted to until this was done with.

Remus couldn't help but randomly wonder why Harry was still referring to Sirius by his last name. He recognized the look of consternation that crossed Sirius' face every time he heard it as well, that was still there right now in the middle of all this, which caused him to finally crack a smile. Maybe Sirius was exaggerating the face, maybe Remus just needed something to smile about before he lost himself, but that did it.

Sirius was already starting to run out of things to say, recoiling along with the rest of them, knowing he wouldn't be able to keep it up when the moment came and his life was likely to flash across his eyes as surely now as it would then, and he could no longer look upon half of it with any kind of happiness because of the tainted person.

Lily was not stumbling through this as fast as she'd planned, the words kept getting jumbled together and she just knew she was going to vomit here in a second. The only thing still keeping her going was a near constant glance up at the black haired youth, sitting next to her husband. When he caught sight of her staring he put on such a brave face she had no choice but to smile until she kept going.

Again! Again, and again, and again, Harry just kept getting left on his own to deal with these things, it always felt like he was abandoned at the worst of times, now Sirius was the cause of it! Sirius finally lost any last drop of comfort he was going for in sake of the others, now wanting to hurry the process up and just greet the Reaper by this point he felt so ashamed.

Sirius swore violently and scrambled to his feet in a real life panic now. All of them were when they realized that thing was going to Kiss Harry! The dementors were acting on orders about attacking Sirius, it didn't make them hate them any less, but if there was one thing to kick them from misery to fire tempered protection it was Harry being in trouble.

What could they do though, what could anyone do? The only living person they could have counted on for help was running around in the Forbidden Forest, Remus wouldn't even realize what was happening until morning, and what could a werewolf do against a dementor? Harry blinked in shock and blurted out "do dementors affect werewolves? I mean, like, the actual werewolf part."

Remus gave Harry a look of utter disbelief. He seemed remarkably calm now, still confused and upset like the others, but not particularly concerned for his life. Considering his reaction to Sirius a moment ago, it gave him a real pause and a blatant reminder Harry had survived. How? No one knew, but he certainly wanted that answer, so instead of cursing and screaming and unnecessarily producing a patronus right now, no matter how much he hated that animal, like he knew they all wanted to do, he answered, "I have no idea. As far as I know the two have never intersected. The werewolf's base emotion is to attack, that's certainly not a happy feeling, so I doubt the dementors could effect that."

Harry grinned in appreciation, watching the others wearily sit back down as they realized what Remus had. They wanted their answers more than swearing to the heavens those things existed. They'd spent so long being angry at what the rat had done, and now were so low at what was going to happen to Sirius, the fact that Harry was okay was the only thing keeping them going.

James hands wouldn't sit still. Wanting to reach over and grab hold of Sirius, to never let go so long as he just kept breathing. To reach for his wand and do something, anything to make this go away. To hold and cuddle his baby to his chest, to go and hug his son now so that he had something to cling onto who despite all odds lived when the rest of them hadn't. No one had ever looked under a dementor's hood and lived, and now James had a mental image he never wanted, and it still wasn't the worst thing to happen to him today.

Sirius felt like that was his own lifeline that had been snipped. He fell back against his friends and probably would have kept falling forever if they weren't both there now, each holding tight to him to make sure he wasn't really going anywhere.

Harry felt torn in two, he wanted to go to Sirius and cling to him now, promise himself that a connection to his family really hadn't been lost this night, but Remus and James weren't leaving much room, Sirius looked nearly smothered, and he wouldn't leave his mom now.

His mother's great sob was his answer, she definitely needed him more, as he curled tightly into her and promised he wasn't going anywhere, and Lily had to blink ghosts and tears and screams away for several minutes, watching the book in her lap and all the little wet spots on the pages that still weren't enough to erase the words, and just wanting this to be over.

Lily finally felt like she could breathe again, clutching the lifeline of little print that promised her something had changed, whatever had saved her son's life was happening!

'A patronus,' they all realized at once. Though what, who could have sent it? Maybe a teacher from the school had come down and realized what had happened. Galloping, that implied a horse like shape to whoever owned it, but there were just too many possibilities, and they were just too exalted in breathing air again to care. Harry was safe...but what about Sirius? Had the dementors gotten him while Harry was being attacked? They had come from all sides...

"Who did it look like?" Sirius quickly asked, his voice no longer sounding like his own, but just wanting to think of anything but a shell of his body being left behind for Harry to find.

Harry didn't answer though, he was blinking and squinting at nothing like he couldn't see clearly, still holding tight to his mother and throwing fear filled looks at Sirius. Clearly whoever he'd seen had startled him, but the fact that he didn't answer wasn't promising. Lily just wanted to get the book out of her own hands at this point so finished.

Lily let out a pitiful moan as she pushed the book away, letting it land on the floor and just clinging to her son because that was all she could think to do. The boys weren't much better, each of them stuck on the idea, but unable to say it, spit it out, it even hurt to think it, because Sirius just couldn't be dead.

* * *

So yeah, been dropping little hints for a while that Harry was going to remember something soon that wasn't going to be good, and it was this. Harry remembers how he felt when Sirius died, and has no way to tell them otherwise, but this was the wrong time, so they get to spend this and most of the next chapter thinking Sirius is dead...I am a cruel person and I regret nothing.


	21. HERMIONE'S SECRET

I know you are all thinking yay for an early update, so I'm hoping the happiness will linger through the whole of this chapter...

* * *

The four of them felt so emotionally strained they didn't know what to do anymore. None of them made a move to stop Harry, they just wanted this done with. The only comfort they had left was that this hadn't happened yet, they still had Sirius right here with them.

Harry's hands were shaking terribly as he went for the book. He couldn't seem to get rid of that fear, that lingering something that told him Sirius was going to die. Then why had he felt so confused when Sirius had tried to comfort him about the patronus...was it possible his instinct was finally wrong? He desperately hoped so with everything in him, it was the only thing forcing his words out.

Lily made a rasping noise, like she agreed but the thought was to terrible it shouldn't have ever been put into words. She knew whoever was speaking was of course talking about Harry, but it didn't erase that implanted fear that she was soon going to have to hear about Sirius really...

James snarled, he'd never heard such a ludicrous thing in his life! He was, probably irrationally some higher reasoning tried to protest but he kicked it away, blaming Snape for this whole mess, for what happened to Sirius! If Snape had never showed up then they would have gotten out of there so much sooner, then Remus wouldn't have transformed at that time, then the rat wouldn't have gotten away! This was Snape's fault! He remembered that promise he'd made to Lily, that he wouldn't kill him until they heard everything, but as far as James was concerned this was irredeemable and that Death Eater was dying as soon as he took care of the other one. Now if only they could figure out why they couldn't leave, he really hoped Harry would remember that soon.

"The minister?" Lily muttered with the smallest pinch of hope, trying to figure out if he would have shown up just to collect a body, maybe Sirius wasn't dead yet and he had to show up because he escaped again?

"I'd roll over in my grave I'm sure," Sirius muttered, then received a very sharp pinch from Remus for that, but he didn't even bother to snap back for it this time, he was still intent on reminding them as much as possible he could still make jokes, no matter how bad.

"Probably," Remus said with just a tad of smugness, vividly remembering Sirius having scraped his head, repeatedly, against the tunnel ceiling and how he would have laughed at that any other time, he'd just been a little too distracted to really appreciate it at the time.

'Least I did something useful,' Harry couldn't help but think, still feeling he'd done more harm than good this night. If only he'd been faster and stunned Pettigrew, if he'd stayed out of Sirius' way and let him take care of the rat, instead he'd stood by and let Sirius be caught. If he'd just let Remus and Sirius kill Pettigrew when they'd had the chance they would have had a body and all the proof they needed. Harry knew better than to say anything like that out loud though, because by now he knew they would all try to defend him. Something that still felt a little foreign.

"No, no, no," Lily snarled. "Now they'll never believe a word you say!"

"They wouldn't have believed me if Snape hadn't said anything," Harry grumbled.

"There's still got to be, something-" Remus tried, but he broke himself off and instead just fell back against the couch, feeling utterly defeated. It was three kids and a werewolf's word against probably Dumbledore himself, what chance did they have? Sirius' only hope was somehow making a run for it again, and that was assuming he was even still alive!

Sirius made a 'pfft' noise. The ironic thing was Harry hadn't once wanted to 'catch' him. Oh sure he'd wanted to do some other things, but that hadn't been on the list.

Lily wanted to argue the point, but the problem was she couldn't. From Snape's point of view Harry had gone the past two years, well even this year, and gotten away with a lot, but that was because Snape couldn't see past Harry to the things he'd done. If Harry hadn't stepped in, unspeakable things could have happened. She was as proud of her son for all of those things as any mother could be, and she really wanted to shove it in Snape's face he needed to get over himself.

Harry had a little scowl on his face as he read that, he didn't want to be handed a blind spot. Sure he didn't want to get in trouble either, but the fact that the Minister had just admitted to this rubbed him the wrong way.

"Ha!" James snapped without any humor, his hand curling up and looking dearly like he was going to deck the wall any second he was so sick of hearing that man talk.

"Where are you anyways?" Remus asked, realizing this conversation had gone on long enough and Harry hadn't said anything, despite his clear look of agitation now saying he would have butted in ages ago.

"Still half out of it," Harry sighed, he vaguely remembered hearing these things as if from a long ways off, and mentally reasoned he must be in the hospital wing.

"They didn't even do this on purpose," Sirius ground out in frustration, still vividly remembering his attack on Ron, and while he now saw his reasons were justified he didn't think that made it okay. Harry had only come down there out of loyalty to his friend, he'd had no idea what he was walking into. "They haven't even heard your side of it yet and he just knows everything doesn't he!"

Harry had to take several deep breaths to continue without shouting in annoyance of these two men, clearly talking about him within hearing range like this about something they had no idea about.

Harry couldn't quite get that out without sounding like he was being strangled he was so frustrated by that.

Lily had to fight down the urge to mother her son right now, go and get him some chocolate and watch him eat it, she still couldn't shake away the terror of her baby being surrounded on all sides by dementors with their hoods down, what they could have done to him!

"And good riddance," James croaked, leaning into Sirius just that little bit more, still shaking all over at what they may have already done to his brother. The mystery of who had saved his son's life was still a curious one. He still wanted to ask Harry about it, he'd yet to say anything of who he'd thought he'd seen, but Harry looked just as confused as them.

For a different reason though, because Harry's first thought had been he'd seen his dad. That was ridiculous though, right? But that's who the person had resembled...but his dad was dead. If he wasn't, surely he would have made some miraculous reappearance tonight along with his other friends. Then who had Harry seen? He voiced none of this, not wanting any of them to feel any worse than they already were, and bringing up who he'd thought he'd seen would do just that.

Sirius had never heard a better thing in his life! He made the most relieved sound of all, as surely Snape wouldn't have done that if he'd been Kissed already! They were going to send him back to Azkaban, and he could escape before they did it!

They all just got a small moment of jubilation, Sirius was still alive! That's all they'd needed to hear and suddenly they were so sure everything was going to be okay again, things were going to work out! Then they all saw how uneasy Harry still looked, and his reaction to the news still haunted them...and had Sirius really still died tonight?

"Guess Harry would know what that looked like," Remus grumbled to himself, still shifting around and unable to sit still for five full seconds he was so worried about his friend.

Sirius couldn't help but crack up laughing, wondering if the house-elves had specially made that upon her request, or if she had that on hand for emergencies. She'd probably been saving it up all year just for Harry.

"Something I couldn't be prouder of," James told him fondly, having no doubts Harry would kick up all the fuss in the world to get Sirius out of this mess. Maybe his son being the Boy Who Lived may finally come in handy, if he spread his own side of the story around enough, surely someone would believe him. Maybe the right person would and look into this and find the truth.

"That's the part that is not alright!" Lily hissed, recognizing Pomfrey didn't know better, but still wanting to curse anyone who said otherwise.

Harry let out a strangled gasp, so Sirius wasn't out of the clear yet...and yet he still didn't feel as powerful about that as he had before when he was so sure Sirius was going to die. He was having such conflictions crashing around inside of him, he hardly acknowledged the other's plights of worry as well, just kept reading on, wanting to get his answer already.

Considering how agitated all of them were already at the minister, his concern for Harry didn't hold nearly the amount of weight it should have, the only thing they wanted comforted on now was hearing Sirius was going to be okay.

"That, is, not, funny," James ground out, fighting every impulse he had not to rip this stupid Ministers face off.

"Let's hope shouting in his face will actually work," Remus snarled, not having any real hope it would, just hoping Harry would get past them and try something else soon.

"They're not going to listen to a word," Lily moaned. Even if she had seen it coming it didn't make it any happier to hear.

"I think he has every reason to be distressed," Sirius grumbled, still fighting down the urge to be sick as the scene kept replaying over and over again in his head of that skull like face coming towards his own.

Sirius couldn't help it, that mental image was exactly what he needed to shove his own vision to the side and he cracked up laughing. The other four gave him a touch concerned look, Sirius really had been under so much pressure for so long that they were starting to wonder just how soon he'd start to go crazy. He ignored the looks though, still smirking and shrugging, "What? What adult force feeds you chocolate, it was funny!"

Harry gave a weak little laugh while the others just rolled their eyes at him, far more concerned hearing Sirius made it out of this night alive then his stupid comments for now. Not that any of them would admit his stupid comments was what was keeping them sane, as a constant reminder Sirius was still around to make them.

"Now she's just being pushy," Remus couldn't help but agree with Sirius, having been threatened a number of times by the matron for trying to sneak out and knowing how she could get if her orders weren't followed. If Harry kept resisting her to her face, things might turn out even worse for him.

"You're the one driving me crazy right now," James scowled, still not able to find the same mood as the other two, he wanted Harry to keep trying to get his point across no matter how futile and she was just getting in the way.

"That's, encouraging," Sirius said, not really sure if he meant it. After all, if Dumbledore didn't believe him now, why would telling him all of these things without proof mean anything to him then? What could he possibly say to gain the headmasters trust? Was he wanting to talk to Harry and Hermione to try and lift some stupid curse off of them? When that didn't work, would it be too late for him to realize the kids weren't Confunded?

The others didn't quite know what to think of that either, so no one protested further when Harry kept going.

"Not one little bit," Remus growled.

"Actually, you kind of knocked him out before he could hear," Sirius corrected, "which I still thank you for."

Lily scowled in outrage. How could he still be yelling at her like that! Was he so insistent on seeing Sirius die he'd continuously take it out on these kids, that no other side but his could be right!

"I'm going to rip his tongue out of his head," James snapped, sick and tired of this guy popping up and ruining his loved ones lives every chance he got.

"Snape just did that in front of Dumbledore," James realized, perking up slightly at that. "What are the odds that'll get him fired?"

The others gave a hopeful agreement, except Remus who flinched all over again. Snape had been trying all year apparently to get him fired, he should probably consider himself lucky he hadn't been mentioned along with Sirius about to receive a Kiss. Most likely he was still running around the forest, and now he had the image of a pack of Aurors chasing him down, waiting for him to change back so they could arrest him or worse. He kept his mouth firmly shut though, he'd worry about that later when he heard Sirius was safe.

"I would honestly laugh at that if I didn't want to smash both of your heads together," Sirius grumbled.

The five of them all exchanged concerned looks, Dumbledore's attitude was kind of scaring them, though the fact that he wasn't outright saying he disbelieved Harry and Hermione was the slightest bit of comfort. They all knew that if Dumbledore believed them, Sirius would have the best defense in the world. Surely he must be able to do something to get Sirius out of this.

"Well she's in a bad mood," Remus muttered to himself.

Harry couldn't read that without getting a hitch in his throat, he wasn't going to let that happen to Sirius! For the first time he gained back a tiny bit of confidence, that one little reassuring thought convincing him his first reaction finally had been wrong, he must save Sirius! Terrified of being wrong though, he'd already caused so much pain and confusion by speaking out of these things, he dared not speak anything else.

"Someone please let me out so I can strangle him already," Sirius growled.

"No, really, why hasn't he been fired yet?" James grumbled to himself, wishing more than anything he wasn't joking and Snape would get tossed already for the things he'd done to Harry alone, now he'd turned on his two best friends!

Sirius flinched like he'd been kicked, oh he really didn't want to remember that right now.

James and Remus just looked all the more murderous, something Harry hadn't really thought possible. Both boys were just so sick of Snivellus bringing that up! He'd been sixteen, he'd made a mistake, and he was still holding a grudge for that!* Sirius had even tried to apologize to him! They weren't sure how sincere it had been, since he'd done it after the big row between the four of them and he might have just done it to prove to them he was sorry, but even then Snape had dismissed him and Sirius hadn't tried again.

"Well you did about sum it all up," Lily muttered, hoping Sirius had been more coherent when he'd told Dumbledore all that.

James said something very crude. He didn't want to hear this, he wanted someone to say Sirius was going to be okay, which is why he was so confused when Remus let out a sigh of relief.

He couldn't quite get rid of the look as he eagerly told the others, "don't you see, if he's saying that then this must mean Dumbledore believes him! Why would he say that if he didn't?"

Lily still hesitated, eyeing the book as she pointed out, "why would he believe him now if he hadn't then? Surely Sirius told him all of this back when he was first taken in."

Remus hesitated, his smile slipping away as he honestly didn't have a good answer to that, but he tried anyways. "Sirius didn't realize until after he saw the picture the rat," he still couldn't help but break off with a stutter, he couldn't even refer to him without feeling white hot rage all over again, "was even still alive, he could have put everything he'd said down to a tale until Sirius had seen him that night, Dumbledore knows Legilimency so maybe he pried into his mind tonight and saw the truth then what could have been falsified before." It was only as he finished how loose that sounded, how Remus realized all over again the lengths he wanted to go to defend Dumbledore, and how much it bothered him Dumbledore hadn't believed Sirius then. Shouldn't Dumbledore have simply used Legilimency then, and realized Sirius hadn't been the Secret Keeper, so the rat was the only option? It wasn't adding up, and they all knew it.

The others didn't look any more convinced either, but no one said anything else, so Harry decided to keep going.

James hissed something under his breath, detesting that there was the proof right there, Dumbledore had not tried one bit to stick up for Sirius, but the opposite!

Sirius looked like he'd rather be kicked this time then hear that. He'd followed Dumbledore's orders without question, been nothing but a good soldier through the worst of missions, and that was his reward! How had Dumbledore looked him in the face and accused him of doing that!

"I don't understand," Harry groaned, watching all of them grow more confused and murderous the longer Dumbledore kept going. "Couldn't Sirius have taken ah, a potion or something to prove he wasn't lying?" He felt like he should know something that did that, but he couldn't place it.

Lily's face was going the same color as her fiery red hair, but she tried to force her tone to remain normal as she explained, "there is something, called Veritaserum, but its use will only work on the unexpecting. If Sirius knew he was taking it, his words still wouldn't hold. It's never used in court, because anybody on trial would be hoping it would be used on them."

"What about his wand," James persisted. "They would have taken it from him, proven that wasn't the last spell he'd used."

"Not indefinitely," Sirius sighed, "I could have used anything in between the time it happened and the time they arrived, since I left myself in the street, I may have been 'pretending I was innocent' by doing it." He did not look the least bit happy at explaining away what the Ministry had done to him, but last night in between the nightmares of his sleep and his future, he'd turned over every last inch of how his case could have gone, and that had been one thing he'd stuck on. He'd stayed around in the street, not knowing why then, but clearly having an idea now. He'd lost several bits of sanity he'd been so pleased with himself for murdering that rat, he hadn't cared what happened next.

"Well, what about those Pensive things?" Harry still tried, feeling this argument was as useless as it could get, knowing it wouldn't make a difference, but still forcing himself to try. "They show memories, right? Couldn't Sirius have shown the memory he hadn't been the Secret Keeper? Even if what Remus said is true and Sirius hadn't known for sure the rat had survived, it still would have shown he'd been the one to blow those people up, that Sirius hadn't been the one to do this."

They, had no answer for him. It was true memories could be tampered with, but even when that happens a gray fog would swirl around to prove such a thing, and Sirius' wouldn't have done that. They honestly had no idea how this could have settled in a court of law proving without a doubt Sirius had done this! They still didn't really have their answers, but now knowing Dumbledore had a hand in it wasn't helping much, his testimony alone would be enough to put anyone away as a Death Eater. Which meant that Sirius winding up in Azkaban was damn near as much Dumbledore's fault as anyone's, for not trying to help a man he'd inducted into the Order, for not doing everything to find all the facts.**

Harry tried desperately one last time, "well my memories then! Pettigrew confessed to me what happened, and they've no reason not to believe me, except..." Harry was already trailing off pitifully as he came to his own conclusion amongst all the heartbroken faces, "except they think I'm Confunded, so no matter what my or my friends memories say-" he broke himself off, unable to finish his throat was closing too tight.

Remus made a gut wrenching noise, still hating himself above anyone else for this mess he'd put his friend in, and still neither James nor Sirius would let him dwell on it, they both gave him a look that plainly said they didn't think it for a second, and it left Remus confused. If they still wouldn't, even after everything he'd done to Sirius, were they really so blind?

"Which still doesn't make sense to me," Harry grumbled. "Why's he so different than anyone else?"

The others really didn't know how to explain this to Harry. Either his thirteen year old mind still couldn't grasp the concept, or he was refusing to acknowledge it, but either way they didn't want to be the ones to change it. Harry clearly trusted Remus just fine now, he'd yet to show any ill will towards him no matter what was being shown, so they liked to think this never would change and it had remain the later.

"I hate this!" Lily howled, looking close to tears she was so frustrated. "I hate this so much, I can't stand it. Why is Snape's the only word that matters? If Dumbledore's word was enough to put Sirius in there, then surely it should be enough to at least hold off on that, that sentence!" It was beyond frustrating, it hurt and confused them almost as much as what that rat had done to them. Sirius was a good man who'd done everything in his power to show he wanted nothing to do with his last name, why couldn't Dumbledore with all his titles and power at least say something to what was happening. Had he really just come there to convince Harry it was pointless to even try?

Sirius face palmed so hard he looked like he was going to leave a bruise on his own forehead. He reflected back to how he'd felt when he first learned of what the rat had done, that all-consuming need, and how it may well have driven him to do those same things now if he could get out of this house, and he still would have kept trying no matter what until Harry calmed him down. It didn't excuse what he'd done, but then again when had he ever thought things through?

They all sighed, wishing they could find out why, what had changed to make Dumbledore see now what he hadn't then? If Merlin help them and this all bloody happened to them again, they would have liked some assurances they could keep Dumbledore on Sirius' side no matter what.

Lily and James looked likely to back down, at least a bit. They admitted they may have been too harsh on Dumbledore, been expecting too much of him. To them he seemed the most powerful warlock to exist, Dumbledore could do anything, even go toe to toe with Voldemort himself. But what he'd said was true, Dumbledore himself wasn't magic, sometimes even he couldn't be expected to do everything. The only problem was they'd been so focused on going after their old headmaster, that now the realization had hit he couldn't do anything, they were sinking right back into the fear sucking depression. They just couldn't sit here and listen to this happening to Sirius! They let Harry keep going though, unable to find the air to do anything else.

Remus winced, wriggling in place as he realized he still felt the same way, still wanted to believe the man he looked up to more than anyone could do no wrong...but the plague was still swirling in the back of his mind, trying to understand what had pulled him away from Sirius when he had needed him most, and only one name able to make him do so.

"Oh?" Lily snapped. "Oh what? What did he say that made her-"

"You know it's really bloody annoying when a little thirteen year old knows more about what's going on then you," Sirius nodded in agreement, cutting off Lily and perhaps receiving a glare for it but allowing Harry to continue.

"Why, would he tell you that?" James asked slowly, some life beginning to return to his face. If Dumbledore was suggesting what he thought...

Harry paid him no mind, his eyes lighting up again with hope finally kindling, he finally felt like he was getting on the right track of what was supposed to happen tonight, something good he hoped.

"Why would he tell you that?" Lily blurted. The room was one thing, but the window was just arbitrary.

Remus felt like his brain was dragging five sentences behind, who on Earth, what was Dumbledore, and by the time he formed a question Harry just kept going.

"By who?" all four of them blurted out as one. True it would be best if they weren't caught helping Sirius, but Dumbledore's instructions were getting weirder as this went on, with no explanation in sight.

"Glad we're not the only ones," Sirius grumbled, knowing Harry couldn't actually answer them until it had happened, knowing none of them had any good idea so theorizing was stupid, but he never liked to be ignored, which is exactly what his pup was doing.

"Why was he directing all of that at Hermione?" Lily said slowly, for the first time in ages thinking of something other than Sirius and his betrayer, her mind circling all the way back to the now childish desire to find out what Hermione had been up to all year. Inconsequential now, as she had much bigger things to worry about, but...did it have something to do with what Dumbledore had told them?

"Three turns of what?" Remus groaned, clearly the others were just as confounded as she was.

James mind flipped back, remembering back to when Hermione had supposedly dropped a necklace, but what did that have to do with anything?

"You have got to be kidding me." Sirius finally broke first, and Harry glanced up to see all of them were a wall of shocked faces. He'd been so excited to finally come across what had been bothering him about Hermione all year, he hadn't even stopped to let anyone say a thing, now he almost cracked a smile at how truly gobsmacked they all looked. Sirius wasn't done yet though. "She's actually been time traveling, all year! That was her big secret, that's how she was getting to her classes! Merlin, she was using time magic to go to classes!" He went from confusion to disbelief in seconds, clearly outraged now. "She could have gotten away with how much trouble, and she was using it for homework-ouch!"

Remus had smacked him, but Sirius' exclamation of surprise had seemed to be mostly that, surprise. Remus was too busy laughing to have put any real force into the action. James wasn't any better, the three looked to have finally cracked and were now laughing like pure idiots.

Lily was slightly frowning at them, honestly happy to see them laughing at all, but failing to find the humor. Though if she was honest she wasn't surprised the first thing their minds had flickered to was how to cause trouble with a thing like this, but she was still far more concerned on how this was supposed to save Sirius' life rather than thinking up ways to prank random people with it. She was still stuck on the fact that Hermione had it at all. Clearly McGonagall had given it to her, but was it really for the sole purpose of attending all those classes? She knew for a fact this wasn't a treatment all Hogwarts students received, though perhaps the invention may not have even been invented yet, she'd certainly never heard of a thing like this. Maybe Hermione was like a test run, to see if all the students could handle a responsibility like this? Finally though she did but in, "well if you lot are done still trying to cause mayhem where it isn't needed, I'd still like to see your arse live through the night."

Sirius sobered up, giving her a little pout which was ruined by the glow in his eyes, since she'd just admitted she actually did care about him. James and Remus stopped more abruptly, minds at once going back to such a bleak future, and Harry really did want to tell his mom off for that, they'd just looked so happy again and she'd reminded them of something he'd been so sure it would take a lifetime to forget. Now they were right back at it, clearly the ideas of whatever had been running through their mind were tainted by the rat they used to include in every little thing. Lily bit at her lip, hard, as she realized the same thing, and regretted her own actions now. She was just so worried about hearing the worst was going to happen, she wanted to hear Harry say the opposite so badly she hadn't really thought her comment through. The silence was back though, and Harry decided to quickly keep reading now.

James still couldn't help a wobbly snicker, swallowing hard to force back any remainder of pain, his son had lived with magic in his life for three years now but this was hard to believe?

"We've seen some weird dreams from you Harry," Remus smiled lightly, "but not even you could make this up."

"Gee, thanks," Harry smirked back.

"I hate time magic," Sirius said at once, going cross eyed at the thought. His mind finally flipping from the act of doing this, to the act itself. Did that mean that Hermione had been in two places at once all year? When did she catch up with herself, or did she just merge back into one person when her hour was up, or was she living two parallel lives now where the her that had gone back an hour to one class was living a different life then the her living this life now, or- "ouch." He moaned out loud, rubbing at his temple.

"My sentiments exactly," James grumbled, his brow ruffling up in confusion as he tried to work that out.

"Let's just ah, hope Hermione explains it a little better," Lily muttered, shaking her head vigorously to get rid of her own train of thought.

"The fact that she actually didn't tell Ron and Harry is almost insulting," Remus rolled his eyes. They told her everything, usually whether they wanted to or not. Even if she flat out refused to use it for them for any reason, they still should have known she had something like that.

"No, no, no," Sirius yelped, bouncing with each word and still looking cross eyed. "You definitely need to explain this mess better, how on earth does the in two places at once thing work?"

Lily was running her fingers through her hair in frustration as she tried, "well, if she spun it back an hour to attend lessons, then continued on her normal schedule lining up with the boys, then it will be like she never left. Time would be on a permanent loop where she never really caught up with herself, because she'd always be an hour, behind herself..." she finished, looking just as confused as when she'd started, not at all sure if she'd explained that in any kind of logical way. The idea of time travel gave her all kinds of confusion, not just because one of the end results was her adult son sitting beside her while the exact same boy at a few months old was upstairs.

The boys still looked like they had a headache from thinking about it, but they weren't arguing the point either.

"Don't correct him now," James scowled, rubbing at his eyes and nearly knocking his glasses off his face. "I'm barely keeping up with one of you, don't ask me to make it two."

"Glad I'm not the only one," Remus grumbled, his eyes unfocused as he tried to tie it all together and coming up with more questions about how this thing worked, what on earth kind of magic went into making this thing, and many more he knew he'd never get an answer to.

"Wait, what?" It's not like they'd forgotten about Buckbeak exactly, but between everything else that had happened, he'd sort of just slipped to the back of their mind. Now the idea that Harry could go back and fix the injustice done to that animal was a great omen indeed of how this night could possibly go, and the hope was almost back. Harry sounded so excited, so assured this made perfect sense, he really hoped they were on the right track with this.

Sirius gave a very happy giggle, going back to when Harry had first rode Buckbeak and how much he'd said he wanted to as well, now that was his ticket out of there, this was clearly as close to perfect as he was going to get and he'd take it.

"Why can't they see themselves again?" James demanded. "Hermione would know what was going on at once and explain it, then get, err, themselves to help."

"James, think about that for a second, what was your first reaction to someone popping up and telling you your future," she said indicating her head slightly to Harry, who was blushing as he realized the same.

James deflated a bit and nodded his agreement, accepting that it would probably be more confusing and more harm than good by the time they tried to do any help.

"Yeah," Sirius nodded in agreement, still looking a little spun around at this turn of events. He was grateful at the fortune Hermione had this to help him, but it was still blowing his mind such a thing even existed. He was a pureblood that had grown up with magic and time travel was still giving him pause to consider, he was actually starting to pity Harry.

"So she keeps saying," Remus grumbled, wondering how she'd stayed out of her own sight all year, did the rule apply to her, because clearly Lily's theory wasn't totally on track because Hermione hadn't set her time back yet, so she was watching herself who hadn't done it yet...wait what?

"I'll weep the day he does close the door in your face," Sirius said quickly, a smug smile on his face.

"Padfoot," James moaned, "I tolerate your stupid jokes the first time, don't make me relive those as well."

Sirius didn't look very repentant, compared to how he'd felt the first time he'd heard this, well he wasn't exactly better now but he was certainly more himself, and driving his friends crazy was one of the things to keep him going, keep his mind off of other things.

"Yeah, I'm with Harry on that one," Remus nodded.

Lily balked at the time frame that was being set up, but Harry read before she could make the comment.

"I can't help but agree," Sirius frowned. "It's too bad you couldn't have brought your cloak back, ah Remus had it last right? So you left it out on the grounds when you went chasing after me, which means that probably Snape confiscated it or something."

"That still wouldn't help them much," James disagreed, "there's too much else involved. They'd need a distraction or something in between them seeing Buckbeak and them sneaking him away."

"Well this should get interesting," Remus muttered.

That left them all tensed and disgusted, unable to grasp any feelings they'd had at that name before except pure hatred. Harry refused to linger on it though, he wanted to find out Sirius was okay too badly.

"That wouldn't work," Remus interrupted, "you'd interfere with your own timeline, and you wouldn't find out what you did. You need to let those things play out at least, or who knows what will happen to you."

Harry sighed, thinking he still should have come up with some other solution then just letting that rat get away all over again, but he also knew deep down keeping Sirius alive was more important and he hoped he never lost sight of that.

"Which still wouldn't go over that well," Lily shook her head seriously, but she had a feeling Hermione was going to explain so she kept her mouth shut and listened curiously.

"Both perfectly reasonable," Sirius said with a light smirk, both things having flashed across his mind days ago when he'd found Harry in the kitchen.

"Yeah, I can see that being a problem," Remus said with a slight frown, this didn't make him any happier because he was still waiting to hear how Harry and Hermione did work out how to fix everything, including catching that rat after they were sure Sirius would be okay.

Harry though was thinking of something totally different, for the first time realizing that he was technically doing this now. He was messing with time magic by showing his family all of these things. Could he somehow possibly make his own future worse, was he going to somehow erase himself? It was giving him a splitting headache to work all of that out, and since he didn't even have the answer of how he'd wound up here, he decided to save that for later.

"I am, actually jealous of this," Sirius huffed, his earlier joke still standing. He couldn't believe Hermione had just been using this for school work all year, the number of things you could be doing with something like this! He really wanted to know how new this invention was, clearly there was a prototype going on as this must be what his drunken memory couldn't remember. How many time magic projects could the Department of Mysteries be working on?

"You would be," Lily scoffed, rather on Hermione's side with all of this, people could do a lot more harm than good with this kind of thing, but since she could also see some practical applications, in the right hands that weren't Sirius' or any of the Marauders honestly, she didn't want to encourage them.

They all flashed back to remembering how they'd felt so low the first time hearing all of this, their fear of the wrongdoing to Buckbeak and how it still wasn't right, but at least now they had the absolute knowledge Harry and Hermione did have something to do about it, they were going to save that hippogriff.

"Because, you know, that's a thing now," James said, shaking his head loosely to force himself to keep up, this time travel was still giving him a bit of a turn around.

"Why?" Lily grumbled, not knocking anyone doing it so long as it was done, but still pointing out, "Hermione at least would have been in less trouble if she'd been caught, you weren't supposed to be on the grounds at all."

Harry just shrugged, saying, "Thought I could do it faster, he already knew me better, was kind of hoping he'd remember me."

"It's moments like that when magic really comes in handy," Sirius whispered to himself, having realized several times over Harry's first instinct was to Muggle his way out of things, but a quick little charm to snip away the rope would have done that a lot faster.

"Oh not now," Remus moaned, "of all the times for this animal to get stubborn!"

"Isn't that how working with animals usually goes," James huffed, going fidgety with unease all over again, not even able to stand the idea of Harry getting caught and Sirius still falling to his fate, having to put every last drop he had left into the belief Harry would come through and fix this via Buckbeak. He was still forcing his voice to come out as normal as usual though, not wanting to freak anyone out as much as he was, "they do exactly the opposite of what you want when you need them most."

The others didn't need him to spell it out, they were all grasping just as much that Sirius' fate now laid in the hands of Buckbeak cooperating, so they didn't say anything further.

Lily still couldn't help a little 'ooh' of sadness, even though she was twisting every last one of her fingers in hopes that wouldn't happen, what Hagrid was doing for his pet was the kindest thing.

Sirius gave a slight sigh of relief, at least Dumbledore was still good for something.

"It's not Harry who's not hurrying," James huffed.

"That was still pretty dangerous," Remus couldn't help but mutter, shifting around uneasily. "She could have gotten into his personal space without bowing, could have caused a lot more harm than good.

"Well thankfully Harry was good enough," Sirius grumbled back.

They all released a loud sigh of relief, never in their life having pictured the getaway of a hippogriff would mean so much to them.

"Ha!" Sirius couldn't help a petty little triumphant shout of joy, thinking that Buckbeak getting away was just one of the things they would be worrying about tonight.

"Oh," Lily brightened, "well thank goodness for that." She wished Harry had spotted this earlier, she would have felt just that little bit better knowing Buckbeak had never really died in any timeline, but she supposed it wouldn't have made her feel any better in the long run after what she had soon found out after the fact, so let it go.

"Naww," Lily cooed all over again, finding Hagrid's pet's loyalty to him speaking volumes for how the man really treated them, though his actions during this whole ordeal had said more than enough.

"Yeah, might just be better to try and tie him off to another tree," James frowned, thinking that both kids put together wouldn't even weigh as much as Buckbeak, let alone really restrain him.

"Why is that the first thing he thought of?" Remus scoffed. "Him untying himself makes much more sense, he's plenty intelligent enough to get out of his bindings I'm sure, normal horses certainly can. Plus, why would someone even steal him?"

"You are asking the wrong people," Sirius pointed out.

"Glad someone thought of that," Sirius and James grumbled.

"Delayed shock or fear of getting caught I guess," Harry muttered, thinking he probably hadn't looked much better.

"Don't actually want to watch that again," all three boys muttered, though thinking of three completely different things.

"Go ahead and mention that a couple more times Hermione, I don't think he's quite gotten the message," Lily rolled her eyes.

Sirius felt deeply torn, wanting to growl murderous threats for the next twelve years about that rat, yet lingering guilt still eating at him for having attacked Ron. His actions made perfect sense to him now of course, he'd clearly been desperate after the little rodent had escaped him all year, but he didn't think taking Ron with him had really been the best move either.

Nope, there it was, guilt won for now. He'd half wished Harry and Hermione wouldn't get there in time to see this, because this was exactly what he'd been hoping Harry wouldn't resee.

"Yeah, I'm still with you on that one son," James muttered, going slightly cross eyed at the idea of literally watching yourself do something you'd just done that night.

"Thank you for the running commentary Hermione," Remus rolled his eyes, thinking they could have worked that out for themselves.

"Well Harry's not being much better," Sirius gave a forced laugh.

"Jeez, that timing," James shook his head, very grateful it had happened exactly like that, if Harry and Hermione hadn't followed Ron down in time things really could have turned out worse than they did, if that were possible.

"Ah, no," they all muttered with pure hatred at the idea, having no doubts he would have cursed Sirius as soon as anyone, he'd made that quite clear.

"Yeah, and that," Remus shuddered, feeling guilty at once he'd thought that of Dumbledore, but unable to come up with a way to take it back, so for now wanting to blame it more on the minister.

"The moon wouldn't have peaked by then, he transforms at the set time, not necessarily because of the moon light," James corrected, since this was very clearly the last thing Remus wanted to talk about.

"Besides, Snape would never have brought him that potion so late, he'd bring it to him as early as he could," Lily reminded.

"Guess I didn't notice it," Remus muttered, thinking he'd had a million other things on his mind then noticing something like that in the shadows.

"He wouldn't be seen, he's going out there to get the cloak to be unseen," Sirius pointed out without any real hope.

Lily shook her head though, pointing out, "it wouldn't really change anything. He still would have barged in there, except instead of waiting until after hearing Remus' story he just would have readjusted things slightly, I'm sure everything still would have happened exactly the same."

"Still would save me the nightmares of him using my cloak," James shuddered.

"I still want to see Snape's timing cursed into oblivion," Remus growled.

"Oh, well," Sirius struggled before still saying, "if they hadn't argued about it, Harry still would have made it in time to get under the cloak and Hagrid never would have seen him."

"There really is no point to this," Lily sighed, waving Harry on.

This time they all gave a little aww, this time of sadness though. For the first time realizing, Buckbeak couldn't go back to Hagrid. His life may have been saved, but he'd been taken away from his owner in the process, which was pretty sad as well. They realized Sirius would be taking him to get away, but what would he do with him then, set him free? Would he go back to Hagrid then? They really were thinking too hard about this, when each of them were far more concerned with hearing Sirius get out of this mess first, so no one really brought it up.

Lily still couldn't help one last coo, wanting to go pet the poor thing.

"My sentiments exactly," James scoffed with a crinkled nose.

"Least we didn't have to relive that bloody conversation," James sighed, rubbing absently at his still aching chest, thinking he could never think about the Shack again without the worst conversation of his life coming to the forefront.

"That's still a very good question," Sirius said bracingly, looking for anything to get James mind off of that even for just a second.

James only pretended to look interested, still feeling lost, confused, betrayed and a thousand other things no matter how many times he accepted the fate of the rat.

All five of them still gave a terrible shudder like they were trying to burst right out of their own skins, that was never going to get any easier hearing either.

"Well come on," Remus prompted, wanting a real answer this time to keep his own mind on the here and now. "Who did you think it was?"

"Err," Harry muttered, his eyes flickering to his dad and away again he didn't think anyone had noticed, but couldn't come up with anything to say. He was being stupid of course, it couldn't have really been his dad...right? Was it so crazy to believe though, when another dead man had come back to life this night? Was it so absurd to think his father could have as well? Was it right that Peter Pettigrew was the only one to have done so? Deep down though, in the recesses of his gut he felt nothing, no confirmation, no reassurances he was right...but then again he was still having mixed feelings about the last gut feeling he'd had about Sirius so should he even really still trust that? He'd hesitated too long, and still hadn't answered, so with nothing to really say he still read much to everyone else's disappointment. How bad could it be?

 **Hermione was persistent though, still asking who Harry thought he'd seen, and he finally admitted his dad.**

Harry had said all of this in such a rush no one had a chance to interrupt, but once he finally blurted out that part he nearly spat out the end and then cringed like he expected to be yelled at for it, better that then the false hope trying to rear up in his heart, and the hollow echoes of everything else in him trying to warn him that wasn't true.

James was actually the first to speak up though, having to get the words past a harsh lump in his throat he still managed, "I'm, sorry Harry, I just don't see how that's possible. There's no reason in the world I wouldn't have been there for you long before this night."

Harry winced, he'd known that to be true, but still he tried, "we never found out why Remus stayed away, maybe-"

But James cut him off with a steely glint in his eyes, "after what you heard from the dementors," he still gave a terrible flinch at the reminder, "and even then, it's not possible, there's not a thing that would have stopped me coming to get you well before that night. I'm sorry son, you must have just been projecting."

Harry sighed, he knew his dad was right, it just didn't make him any happier to hear.

The others were all avoiding each other's eyes or they were likely to burst into tears, and when Harry recognized he was only making things worse and he probably wasn't going to be having any more a pleasant conversation with Hermione about this, he forced himself to keep going in despondent tones.

 **Hermione was watching him carefully as she reminded him his dad was dead.**

"Thank you Hermione," Lily tried for a biting tone, but she came out more watery than she meant to, leaning in close to her son and keeping her eyes on her husband to make absolutely sure that wasn't true right now.

 **Harry agreed at once, and when Hermione tried to ask if it's possible he'd seen something else, Harry insisted the man had looked like the old photos Harry had.**

That gave them a little bit of a pause, maybe the person had resembled James enough Harry's eyes weren't just seeing what they wanted, but some resemblance, but it still didn't in any way answer the question who on earth it could be.

 **Hermione was still looking at him as though worried about his sanity.**

Sirius let out a noise like he wanted to snort, but it came out too runny. He still managed a half hearted, "gee thanks for the vote of confidence."

 **Harry admitted he was well aware how it sounded, but he still trailed off into silence. His mind locked on his dad's old three friends, Moony, Wormtail,**

Lily and Harry at least tried to suppress their combined loathing and disgust at the mention of that name, but the boys couldn't even be bothered to do that, thinking the little rat had never deserved the title of a Wormtail more than in these last few hours, and yet regretting every second they'd ever even known him, to give him such a nickname that meant so much to them... and if they didn't keep listening to Harry they were going to go into a frenzy all over again.

 **and Padfoot, was it so unlikely Prongs had been here tonight as well?**

Despite James words, it didn't make him feel any better. He knew he was right, there wasn't a force on earth that should have been able to stop him getting to his son those long thirteen years, and yet what he wouldn't give for that to be him, for some reasonable explanation to crop up like he'd been sharing a cell with Sirius or something...anything really then this constant bleak reminder he really wasn't there for his son.

 **Wormtail**

Harry hated having to say that, feeling it came out as foul as the word Mudblood, and he was the one struggling to say it. He didn't want to think how anybody else was going to have to react later if that name ever came up again.

 **had come back after everyone thought he was dead, was it so impossible for James to have done the same?**

James couldn't help but sigh, beating furiously against a little spark of hope wanting to bloom in his chest. Hating himself if he was alive, wishing with everything he had he was, it was going to crack his heart in two soon. Sirius recognized this and leaned his weight against James, giving him a smile that plainly said 'I know exactly the feeling,' at least making James feel just the smallest bit better.

 **Had he really just been seeing things across the water, the person had been too far away to see properly.**

Lily wasn't the only one hoping now that somehow Harry would get himself into a position at the lake, properly see who all this fuss was about, bury the answer whatever it may be already, because this dragging out was going to drive her mad soon.

 **Yet for just one second he'd been so sure it was him.**

Remus made an odd noise, like he was trying to blow his nose quietly, which everyone politely ignored.

 **Hours later and Hermione was the first to speak again, whispering that they were coming out. Harry looked over and saw them all coming out again,**

"That's not the same order as last time," James pointed out, actually pleased to think of something else again.

"I was just listing the lot of them that time, not saying what order they were in," Harry shrugged.

 **heading back to the castle, and then the clouds began to shift, making the moon appear.**

Remus still let out a hate filled noise, like he wanted to chuck himself in the fire place all over again as this had been exactly what he hadn't wanted to relive so soon, he knew he would be for the rest of his life anyways, but Sirius gave him a hard nudge and a stern look stating quite clearly he wasn't going to listen to that this time anymore then the first, so Remus still had no choice but to let it go for now.

 **Hermione was watching Harry tense up, still cautioning him he couldn't do anything, and Harry snapped back he couldn't just let Pettigrew get away again!**

James was grinding his teeth together so hard he was likely to be toothless here in a few minutes, but he couldn't help it. He'd have that image burned into his brain for his lifetime, the little rat scampering away into the dark without a glance back over and over again, and this was exactly what he hadn't wanted Harry to see all over again.

 **Hermione demanded how Harry was supposed to find him anyways?**

"I can think of several options actually," Lily snarled, then winced and tried for a more normal tone, and though she failed she still kept going. "You could have gone up to Remus' office and snatched the map, you've snuck around the castle enough it wouldn't have been impossible, then grabbed him while waiting for Sirius to get put up."

Harry just sat there gaping at his mother, as this hadn't crossed his mind at all. He'd spent the hour to busy going over that moment in his mind, trying to place those pictures he had of his dad to his memory and convince himself it was real. Now he realized not only how wrong the idea was but he'd let up a perfect opportunity to catch the rat and put him away instead of Sirius going on the run!

"Sorry Lily, but I don't honestly think Hermione would have let him get away with that," James said quickly, anything to get rid of that look now on Harry's face. "She'd be too afraid of them getting caught, and without the cloak there really was a big risk of it. They were stuck where they were."

Harry at least looked a bit relieved and not nearly as guilt ridden.

Lily clearly hadn't meant to do it, she was just as frustrated as the rest of them and wanting to think of something to do rather than sit around and think about Sirius being Kissed all because of that traitor, but she'd wanted to take the words back as soon as they were out because of how Harry had instantly blamed himself for not thinking of that. Her son clearly had some issues with blaming himself for everything, something she really hoped he didn't carry all his life, or at least someone talked him out of like they were trying to.

Remus made a guttural noise, hating how casual Harry actually managed to make that sound, still blaming himself no matter what anyone else said that this was all his stupid fault, but keeping it to himself enough all he received were looks for it this time rather than another speech from one of his friends.

"It's going to be fine," Harry quickly added on the second he'd finished that, watching Remus look likely to pass out again. "We're both fine, I promise-" he winced and went to shaking nearly as badly as Remus, but both quickly forced themselves to settle down. Both coming to the realization getting past this was much more important then continued dwelling on it.

They all released heavy sighs, it wasn't the best solution because Hagrid could be back at any time, unless he went down to Hogsmeade to continue getting drunk rather than the castle so they'd have a bit more time, but they'd still much rather Harry tried to get to the lake and see this mystery person rather than continue delaying.

Remus gave one last terrible flash of what could have been before forcing it away, thankful he'd never even come in sight, or hopefully if the worst had happened and he had come after Harry, Buckbeak would have been a better target. He'd hate to be the cause of Buckbeak's death, even more so when he realized that it would make it all the more difficult for Sirius to escape, but then he realized he just kept creating what if scenarios and tried to shut his brain off.

"Least someone's in a good mood," Sirius muttered.

"Can't rightly blame her at some point," James said happily, perking up as he wondered if Harry was thinking what he was.

"Thanks for the reminder," Lily muttered, still wanting to clutch up her son and never let him go for all the trouble he seemed to get himself into.

"Yes!" They all yelped, more than happy to hear this. James was right of course, there was no way it was him...but at least they got to hear whoever it was.

James still looked like he wanted to burst into tears any given second, what he would give to actually be there for both his son and brother in that moment of need, but unable to explain away just what couldn't be possible.

Funnily enough this wasn't making them feel better, as they now knew exactly where on the lake all of this was happening. There weren't too many bushes so near the water's edge, which meant the next time they went up to visit the school they could never look at this spot again and would instead feel yet another flood of memories that would drown them all.

James couldn't repress a high pitched, keening noise, throat tight as he desperately wanted to go for his wand, to do just once what Harry needed of him. Sirius wriggled as close as he could and put an arm around him, silently promising him it would be okay, Harry was safe now. It didn't erase the want, but it did make it bearable.

They all went terribly stiff, wondering if possibly Harry and Hermione had accidentally somehow changed something, what would happen if that happened in Harry's past? Would he cease to exist in the Time Turner's present? Time travel was making this a whomping headache, and Harry reading now was the only thing keeping them in their skin.

"Wha-" someone tried to interrupt, but Harry went from confused and, though he wouldn't admit it, disappointed to bright eyed understanding as he kept going. Now that he fully understood what had happened, he just knew something spectacular was fixing to happen, something that meant the world to him.

'He did it' they realized, feeling the combination of shock at such a powerful shot of magic at his age couple with the still lingering smack in the face that he'd been the one to chase all of those dementors away, plus it wasn't James at all but a very near look alike! All of that left them with failed voices while Harry quickly read.

Something finally stirred James out of his shock, as he struggled to get out, "you, did see me?"

"I saw the next best thing," Harry breathed, watching his dad closely like he feared at any second he was going to disappear in a mist of silver as well, for the first time really putting that goofy nickname with the proud animal, comparing the ghost of his father's animal to the man he saw now and knowing he could finally treasure the image in a way he never thought possible. He'd been so desperate to find some part of himself in James, and now he had the best thing of all.

James still looked likely to pass out or burst into tears any moment, he'd never felt such a combination of things in his life. Pride, his son had actually produced such a powerful spell to drive away so many dementors, shock and glee it was his own animal he treasured so much. It was like he truly had been there for his son right when he really needed him.

Sirius cracked. He had to stuff his fist in his mouth to stop himself ruining the moment the two were clearly having, but he couldn't help it. He caught Lily's eye and managed to get out, "you know this means you can't call him Hare Bear anymore. He's not a rabbit, or a bear, or whatever the bloody hell that was supposed to mean. He really would turn into Prongs Junior."

"Why do we keep you around again?" Remus demanded, watching all three of them give him annoyed looks, but Sirius either didn't notice, or didn't care, he was still too busy laughing.

"I'll call my son whatever I want to," Lily shot back, "now shut it Sirius or I'm going to wish they'd left you in the stinking cell."

Sirius didn't look very repentant, if anything he just kept smiling wider he was just so pleased at finally getting some form of good mood into him, and keeping it.

That gave them all a quick start, what else could happen tonight!

"Okay wait, back up," Remus demanded, making a remind motion with his hand. "Are you telling me that everything you just did, you already did?"

"And am going to do," Harry added on, going cross-eyed at the thought.

"I guess that kind of makes sense," James muttered, scrunching up his brows. "It goes along with what Lily said about time being on a permanent loop, kind of."

"It's still giving me a headache to think about," Sirius grumbled still trying to work out in his head how Hermione had been pulling this off all year.

"She's not been nearly as quick on the draw as usual tonight," Remus pointed out, still rubbing at his temple as he tried to work out this mess in his head.

"Leave her alone," Lily sighed, just wanting this night to be done with.

"I haven't even gotten over my shock of that happening," Sirius agreed, nodding along vigorously.

"No wonder you were so adamant about your ability to pull it off," Remus laughed.

"Nope," all five of them muttered together. Sure it made sense in context, but the actual act of doing it, being able to pull off the feet, because he'd already done it, was still giving them mind spins.

"What did he do now?" James groaned.

"When did he get his wand back?" Sirius asked. "I must have still had it on me, otherwise he wouldn't have stayed suspended when I transformed."

"You must have dropped it," James shrugged, "and it took a few moments for the spell to wear off."

"I doubt they gave me a tour of the castle in the meantime," Sirius muttered, as anxious as anyone to hear himself go, well not free, but at least free of that place.

"Does he carry that thing around with him everywhere?" Lily asked in disgust.

"Least you've had practice with this once already," James sighed.

"Why did Hermione have to come at all now?" Remus couldn't help but worry, not exactly wanting to leave her alone near the forest either, but worrying about how many people Buckbeak could hold. "Normal horses are only expected to carry two maximum, there couldn't be that much room up there."

"It was better than losing time backtracking for her later, we were on a deadline," Harry shrugged.

"I am really curious who trained Buckbeak," Sirius couldn't help but say with admiration. "I guess I can see Hagrid doing this in his spare time, but still, I can't imagine Hagrid could ride him very well, it would have had to be all ground training."

"Perhaps some of the seventh years might have done it as a pet project," Remus offered with a shrug, Kettleburn had always been big on encouraging his students to do hands on work with their favorite beasts.

Harry couldn't help a quiet giggle, letting it form into full blown laughter after a moment. He hadn't been able to indulge in it then, but the utter relief he felt, the assured feeling that Sirius was going to survive this night was finally being lifted, and the shock crossing his features then had been comical, he couldn't even remember if he'd ever told Sirius the whole story of how he'd pulled this off.

"Genuinely surprised he wasn't restrained," Lily admitted. Even without his wand, she found it surprising he'd been free to walk the room. Had Dumbledore possibly done this for him, after he'd been convinced?

"Boy that's going to be a fun retelling," Sirius laughed right along with Harry's good mood now.

"You always did know it was better to ask questions later and roll with it for now," James nodded.

"Think I should just consider myself lucky he's not trying to throw me off and attack me," Sirius muttered, thinking it must be the same thing as it was for Hermione, Harry's presence was enough of an assurance for the hippogriff.

"I knew you cared," Harry chuckled, watching the shame reappear on his face now at that reminder, but having already been reassured it wasn't permanent he tried to let that one go, hopefully Ron wouldn't hold a grudge.

"Though he never was good at following orders," Remus muttered, shifting his weight around, as anxious as anyone to hear Sirius gone, and staunchly ignoring himself being left behind, and what could happen because of that. He deserved whatever became of it, he'd happily take the fall for Sirius, it was his fault that Sirius' name hadn't been cleared this night.

"For once Sirius, listen to someone else's advice," Lily groaned, receiving an eye roll for her troubles. She couldn't help it though, she almost felt like a fool as she remembered back before all this mayhem had really kicked into gear, back in the Shrieking Shack when Harry had reassured that no one died tonight. She should have remembered that of course that would extend to Sirius, Harry must have just been overreacting to the situation of hearing Sirius about to die, it couldn't possibly be a memory trying to return. Surely her son was just being as emotional as all of them at the thought.

Harry blinked a few times before blushing deeply, now realizing that Sirius saying this could be given no higher praise. Sirius was still smiling at him, thinking he'd never said truer words as he eyed the man now who so resembled his brother in every way that mattered.

Harry finally released a heavy sigh of relief, closing the book and announcing, "chapter was over, think there should only be one left."

Sirius looked so worn he didn't look like he wanted to hear anymore. He still hadn't absorbed everything that had happened since that stupid prediction. It now made sense, he'd finally gotten his answers, and he hated every single one of them. He'd never wished so much in his life for something to not be true, to learn that even now he'd had to rely on Harry to get out of trouble rather than the other way around. He felt so useless and like he'd failed the lot of them for still having suggested the ruse in the first place that had set them all on this path.

He was given a jolting distraction though, by Lily taking to her feet, marching over to Sirius, and pulling him into a bone crushing hug as she murmured, "thank Merlin you're safe."

He returned the hug indulgently, giving her a comforting squeeze as he promised, "I'm going to remember this the next time you're yelling at me."

She predictably leaned back and smacked him for that, but there was absolutely no force to the blow.

Sirius really did want to change the subject now though before anyone else could start trying to hug him, and was saved by Harry.

"Can I see it," he demanded eagerly. Harry couldn't help the tone though, he was still blasted from shock. He'd been searching for something other than physical possessions that would concrete his proof that the man across from him was his father, looking for any kind of real connection, and he found it in his Patronus! Of all the animals in the world, he had the fortune to get the same one as his own dad!

James didn't even need to ask what he meant, as he got up and backed several paces away, and before Harry's eyes he began to change. It wasn't like watching Remus change, which had seemed horrifying and painful. James made it look smooth, as natural as breathing as his face elongated, his clothes began to vanish, and with a small pop he was down on all fours and still managing to meet Harry's eyes.

The stag was majestic, there really weren't too many other ways to say it. Even standing there in the middle of a dull living room, his dark black melanistic fur gleamed, though didn't quite cover everything as he also had some white tracing from the tip of his nose and circling back in a mockery of the glasses covering his face. Even the dark gleaming black eyes held familiar hints of hazel. The three tips sprouting out prominently from each prong had little bits of fuzz on them, giving him an almost cute look despite the danger Harry was well aware that they could possibly run him through.

Harry took a hesitant step forward, like he wanted to reach out and pet the fur much like he'd done all those years ago except now to the real thing, but he didn't get the chance as a bark caught him off guard and something even darker smacked into his knees.

Not to be outdone, Sirius had transformed along with James, but had instead chosen to pounce on Harry in a fit of playful enthusiasm so that Harry could really see what they got up to in these moments.

Harry took a few startled steps back before laughing at what he was seeing. It was the first time he'd seen the pooch in proper lighting, and he recognized he hadn't been exaggerating the size at all, Sirius was quite a huge beast in bulk, but the pink tongue lolling out the side of his mouth and the swishing tail gave every indication he may as well be looking at a puppy and not a bear. Padfoot looked far younger and healthier than Harry had memories of, properly weighted with gleaming fur as healthy as his real hair and the calm gray eyes Harry had grown quite accustomed to looking at.

Not to be outdone, Prongs wasn't letting him have all the fun as he nudged him in agitation, which Padfoot easily dodged and ducked down like he was asking to play.

"Not in the living room," Lily scolded, walking past the pair to head for the stairs. "We don't need any more broken furniture-"

"You broke the last one," Remus protested for his friends, which Lily ignored as she vanished.

The two animals gave a very obvious 'pout' persona before with a small pop they turned back into men.

"That was so cool," Harry practically squealed, feeling like a little kid as he ogled the two.

James and Sirius exchanged very superior smirks, more than pleased that they had impressed the boy like this, and for the first time in his life James understood the feeling of how being praised by his son could feel.

* * *

In case I didn't say it enough in this chapter, I hate time travel. I have hated every time travel plot I've ever come across, and before you can say it, yes. Ever. Single. One. Even my most beloved Harry Potter book. I can't help it, my overanalyze everything brain just comes up with too many questions that never get answered, and I just end in headache. This was my least favorite chapter of the whole entire series, even if the end results was Sirius getting away, and I'm sorry if that came across as lackluster as I felt this chapter's reveal was. I want it to be better, I was just having major struggling issues, and I am sorry for that, but I don't know how to fix it either because every time I tried I got caught up in more mind bending questions.

Yes I do acknowledge this is technically a time travel plot line, but the one thing I will grasp on is when these kinds of things happen and changes occur. There will be an AU after this, consequences to Harry messing with the past. What Harry and Hermione did blows my brains because of the permanent loop part, where it never ended and it's still going and there's a Harry and Hermione who are just now starting to go back just as they arrive and gah!

Hope you guys enjoyed the last part at least. Deer's aren't naturally black by the way, which is why James is melanistic, which means an unnaturally black animal, like the opposite of albino. I love fan art, and while I greatly admire the way other people do him as a natural deer, the other animagus' we've seen seem to have their animals naturally resembling their human coloring. For example McGonagall's tabby cat, tabby only means black stripes on a cat, like McGonagall's black hair going gray.

Also, please don't think I'm a total Dumbledore hater, I respect a lot of the hard decisions he had to make for the good of everyone, it's just easier to hate the face then a lot of the nameless faceless people who also had to have interacted with the Ministry and Dumbledore to make a lot of these things happen.

*I really don't have a lot of defense for what Sirius did, as it's clear he knew full well what he was telling Snape to go do, but I don't really think it should be counted as a full blown attempt at murder either, because it's not like he forced Snape to go. He taunted him, like telling someone to jump off a building to quite bothering you. You shouldn't do it, but people are stupid and Sirius shouldn't have his whole life ruined because of it. Since we never get the full story, from what I can gather Sirius told Snape if you poke the Whomping Willow you'll see what we get up to, and Snape did, but James found out and stopped Snape who still saw Remus transforming.

**I've shown several times that I dislike what Dumbledore's done, but this one thing really broke my heart. For the reasons I've stated it's clear Sirius couldn't absolutely prove he didn't do it, but his evidence should have shown some doubt that he hadn't! Of course we all know Sirius wasn't even given a trial to prove otherwise, but the fact that Dumbledore hadn't seemed to care one little bit just really confuses and bothers me about him.


	22. OWL POST AGAIN

Special thanks to Guest in Europe, who went through PoA and corrected me on my many mistakes in using homonyms. Your ever growing sarcasm while peeling through my works never ceased to make me laugh, leaving a greater impact and hopefully fixing some of those mistakes in the future. As always I genuinely appreciate so much when people do this as it helps future readers not have to deal with my idiocies!

* * *

Remus hated to be the one to get their attention, to remind them there was still a chapter left, but he figured they may as well get this all over with sooner rather than later. They'd have more than enough to be dealing with later as is. Lily came down the stairs with the baby, but decided to hand him over to James while Remus got started.

"The fact that you still somehow pulled all of that off is a miracle," Lily muttered.

Sirius couldn't help but wonder if this was the same tower Hermione and Harry had been caught on with Norbert, and how much trouble he could have left his pup in if he was discovered helping him. They may be almost done but he felt like his worries would never end.

Remus ground his teeth together as he forced that out. He just couldn't believe anyone was okay with this punishment, that the Minister had given his permission for it to happen! The only reason he wasn't still shouting about it was because Sirius had gotten away, but that didn't make what they'd tried to do feel any better.

"Ha!" James snapped, no real humor to be found as he scowled at the book, though briefly distracted when his infant took advantage to their proximity and made a grab for his glasses. The father had a chore for a few moments getting them back from the tight little fists.

Harry made some gagging noises as he theatrically clutched his throat at the thought.

"Oh he wouldn't," Lily frowned. "He can't hate you that much. Why would he hate you at all?"

"I like to think Hermione may have just jumped to the wrong conclusion that time," Sirius agreed with his head cocked to the side. "He has no personal interest what happens to me, could be anything that's got him in such a good mood."

"Madam Pomfrey will know you got out," Lily guessed, "and you could get into a cart load of trouble."

"They can't prove anything," James said at once, bouncing around in unease because he knew how untrue that was. At least Snape would try to pin the whole thing on Harry, and since Fudge clearly liked him this could turn pretty nasty.

"Did it say anything about Dumbledore not seeing you?" Remus asked, "because otherwise that really would have been impossible."

"I think Dumbledore's okay," Harry shrugged, "he did know about all of this after all, we just couldn't let him lock the doors."

Sirius was still cross eyed as he tried to work out that Hermione and Harry had just left to save him...but now they were arriving and talking to Dumbledore because they just had...man he hated time travel.

"Because, you know, that's a sentence that exists now," James rolled his eyes.

Sirius cracked up laughing at that, imagining the poor kid's face when they had to explain all of that to him later.

"I believe that," Remus nodded in sympathy.

"Think it's kind of moot by this point," Lily shrugged, "since it's technically been what, three, almost four hours since that run in with the dementors, and since Harry warded them off the second time Harry never even got a second blast."

"Please stop," James moaned, "I've only just wrapped my head around this, don't make it worse."

"Just let them enjoy the chocolate in peace," Remus agreed.

"Who wants to bet it's some new horror?" Remus sighed, trying to imagine what else could have happened tonight to cause that.

"Oh come on Remus, now you're just depressing me," Sirius tried to give a light laugh, though admittedly on the same page as him.

They couldn't help it, they all started laughing at once. Sirius had just gotten the best of Snape, and the man didn't even know how. He'd just had every last bit of false glory snatched away from him, and he deserved every second of it for what he'd tried to do to Sirius. Only Lily felt the tiny spot of pity, as he didn't know any better, he thought Sirius really had done all of those things, but what he'd tried to do wasn't forgivable. He could have listened to them, which she knew he never would, shouldn't have been out there in the first place, he'd only gone out to torment Remus. So even she couldn't help giggling a bit at this comeuppance.

"Yeah, they should have-" Sirius rolled his eyes.

"But thank Merlin they didn't," James finished for him.

"I think Dumbledore might have had something to do with that," Remus said without any of his usual warmth in speaking of their old headmaster.

No one argued the idea, but they all noticed his tone, but he kept reading quickly before they could ask.

"Well he's not wrong," Harry smirked.

"But still," Lily shook her head at just how stupid and sad this display was. "His first thought is to jump to you? He doesn't even know why you'd help him, he has no idea about any of this, but his first instinct is to blame it all on you."

"They still can't prove anything," Remus grinned, as Harry and Hermione had the perfect alibi now.

Five scowls were aimed at the book though, that bit of violence really was uncalled for.

Remus and Harry gave a happy little laugh, they found the Headmasters attitude perfect with their own, but nobody else still looked very pleased with him, still working out and wanting answers from him before they'd allow any good feelings to surface again.

"Yeah, cause he's really going to tell you," James rolled his eyes.

"Best part is, he's actually right," Sirius cackled.

"Those were always the best moments," Remus agreed with an old smirk. "When he'd try to catch us at something, and he'd be the one telling the truth, but we still got off." His face fell at the end, old memories of the four of them laughing about this all day after the fact, and unable to picture that without going blood thirsty again, so moving on fast.

"Least he admits it now," Lily huffed.

Remus full blown laughed as he realized Dumbledore had just told Snape what Harry and Hermione had done, and yet in such a tone they all knew it wasn't possible, they wouldn't have believed it if they hadn't just heard Harry's account.

Harry also got the realization that somehow Snape had been left out of the loop of Hermione's Time Turner, otherwise he would have thrown that out. Maybe Harry had been wrong before and Flitwick hadn't known about Hermione's secret either, Flitwick just hadn't questioned Hermione missing one class from her perfect attendance, so McGonagall probably had been the only teacher to know about it.

"Goodbye Order of Merlin," Sirius sneered.

Harry couldn't help a small frown, wondering why that felt foreboding to him?

"Disappointment!" Lily nearly shrieked. "He wanted to watch Sirius be, well murder would have been kinder!"

"Ge, thanks Lil," Sirius grumbled.

"Oh you poor thing." James snapped, his dislike of this minister growing more with every time he spoke. Every time he'd been mentioned all he'd seemed to care about was what the Prophet, and by extension, the public would think of him. He may be in his rights to do what had happened so far, but it didn't make any of them like him one little bit.

"Thank you!" They sighed in relief, thinking that if one good thing had come of tonight, it was that! They didn't even care about the reason. Even if Harry did know how to get rid of them now, the last thing they wanted was him going near them again.

"Now how did he know about that?" Harry asked in surprise, he'd certainly not told anyone, and Sirius didn't even know, he'd passed out too soon to even tell Dumbledore, and Snape had shown up too late to see that.

Remus did not look happy to answer, but he hated talking about dementors at all so that wasn't new. "Dementors can, ah, communicate, but it's not something pleasant at all. When they wish to, they can string together thoughts in your head, putting together what they wish for you to understand what they're telling you. It's, unnerving to say the least. Honestly though, I'm surprised they would admit to doing it."

Sirius offered back, "well the Dementors don't have any sense of loyalty to the Ministry and as Hagrid says, they don't care about innocence, so telling Fudge that they were going to perform the Kiss wouldn't have stirred any sense of guilt in them. Harry was in the way of their mission, so they were just doing what came naturally to them-" he couldn't help but studder for a bit right there, the vivid mental image still trying to suck the soul out of him now at his little pup in that situation. "They were probably just told to report what had happened, why they'd come after me and why they left, and they did."

Harry nodded in understanding, but still asked for more, "how did they know to come out there though?* Snape nor anyone ever got a chance to call for them."

James despised every last word he was using, it only served as more of a reminder of how long Sirius had to be there for this to be true, but he still offered, "they say if you're around a dementor enough, it gets ah, a sense for you. It can tell when you're nearby. That's also why they were even used as guards over just say Aurors, they didn't know about Sirius being a dog so the Ministry would have figured the dementors would sense him approaching miles before he got there. Now Sirius has been a dog all year, so they wouldn't have been able to tell that, but he came out of the Whomping Willow as a human talking to you, and the second he did that they would have sensed him and come swarming." He finished with one more great shudder, still feeling sick all over at the thought of this topic.

Harry decided he was out of questions for now, still knowing he'd much rather never have to deal with those things again then keep coming up with questions for them, but also trying to ignore the feeling saying that was wishful thinking.

Sirius groaned something unintelligible that none of them needed to translate. They all agreed anyways, they really hoped Fudge was kidding.

"Least someone would," Remus laughed.

"Oh boy," Lily muttered, not exactly looking forward to hearing this story explained again in detail, she'd barely held it together the first time around.

"Actually that one's a valid question," James frowned, getting a little twitchy as he realized they may not be as in the clear as he'd hoped. Remus hadn't exactly slipped his mind, but as Sirius' problems had been slightly more pressing he hadn't thought about it since Remus was last mentioned. Now he realized there was still a fall guy around, and it wasn't Harry. Snape himself had said he would try and get Remus Kissed along with Sirius, but while Sirius had made a run for it, Remus would probably wake up somewhere in the forest and come stumbling back up to school into the waiting arms of Merlin knew what.

Remus hardly looked concerned, he just gave a halfhearted shrug and tried to keep reading in the most nonchalant way possible. He'd already worked all of that out and knew he wouldn't have a problem dealing with those consequences, someone other than Sirius deserved them and because it was Remus' fault he'd gotten away, Remus would pay for it and wouldn't let his friends dwell on it any more than he could allow.

"Wherever the nearest non extradition country is I would hope," Lily muttered.

James still gave a happy little smile at that reminder, beaming down at his infant son and cooing to him with pleasure.

"Can't imagine how well that worked out," Sirius snickered.

"That could have still been appropriate," Remus chose to laugh now, "happy laughter for his friend."

"Wasn't actually a problem," Harry gave a slight laugh, worried that Remus' good mood had vanished the moment his name came back up.

Harry was very torn, he wanted to ask how Remus would even know such a thing, was it just like a feeling he would get? Vague memories that wouldn't make since, and he had to piece them together? He held that in though, the same fears as everyone else bubbling up because they really wanted to know what had happened to Remus.

"Snape told the Slytherins what?" Sirius began dangerously, his eyes narrowing to near slits as Remus tried to keep going, ignoring his own mounting sense of doom at how this was starting.

"HE DID NOT!" James roared, his hands shaking so bad he was in danger of dropping his child, who began crying at the outburst. James tried to force himself to calm down, rocking his baby gently but the shaking wouldn't stop. He'd been so angry at hearing all of this for so long now, he should have had plenty of practice, but hearing what Snape had just done to one of his friends was not going to be an easy thing to move past.

"I am going to kill him." Sirius vowed right then, his eyes going dangerously dark and his hand already wrapped around his wand. "He couldn't have my soul sucked away so he turns on you! What's he trying to do, get you arrested next!"

Remus tried to pacify them, as Lily and Harry weren't looking much better, "honestly I'm considering myself lucky Hagrid's not yet saying I've been executed. I'll take this over-"

"Snape had better have been fired for that, or so help me I'll wring Dumbledore's and Snape's neck!" Lily cut him off with pure venom. "That was private information that in no way affected anyone at the school, he should not be able to get away with that!"

"It's probably Dumbledore who stopped the Committee for the Control of Dangerous creatures coming after me the moment Fudge made it to the Ministry," Remus argued back, shrinking into the couch at the looks he was getting. He kept going though, he'd always been the persistent one, "if that's all Snape could get away with doing to me, then I'll still be thankful."

"That's it, you're going on the chopping block next," Sirius snapped, unable to comprehend how Remus was still defending them. He'd been targeted as much as Sirius this year and still he was straining to keep peace.

Remus didn't look happy about it though, he was wavering terribly as he struggled to keep going. He was still torn apart inside at what Dumbledore seemed to have done to Sirius in leaving him in Azkaban, how it must have been his Headmaster who had convinced Remus Sirius had done all of those things in the first place, but still it had also been Dumbledore who'd allowed him his job this year, who was clearly still protecting him from the worst of what could happen. Dumbledore had tried to fix his mistake and had helped Sirius in the best way he knew how by giving Harry and Hermione the means to slip Sirius out, shouldn't that give him some redeem ability? Despite how fearsome everyone still looked, Remus kept going while the silence lasted.

"Packing?" Harry repeated, looking just as shocked as anyone at hearing the news. "Why, you aren't really leaving because of that!"

"He better not be," Sirius snapped when Remus failed to answer.

Truth was that yeah, Remus could see it. He'd come closer in that night to attacking three students, one of them being Harry, than he ever had in his life. It had been his fault the rat had gotten away because he hadn't had the sense to stay in the Shrieking Shack, the kids were convinced enough they could have come up with any other solution and dealt with this in the morning, anything other than what he actually did! Still being smothered with guilt, Remus kept going for now, loudly, as he knew James and Lily were fixing to start telling him off like Sirius was going to. He wanted to hear the full thing, find out if he had quit, or was being fired, or something much worse could still be happening that Hagrid didn't know about.

"Hagrid just lost some points with me," James muttered, thinking that Hagrid should be at least a little more upset, but then he reflected that may be too harsh on him. Hagrid had only gotten the story second hand, probably didn't know all the details of how and why Remus was out on the grounds like that. It still irked him anyone would expect Remus to leave because of this.

Remus sighed, he'd gotten the feeling Harry would come and see him, it didn't make him feel any better though. He owed Harry a world of explanations, even with everything come clear about Sirius it still didn't really explain where in the name of Merlin he'd been these past thirteen years. Maybe now that he wasn't technically Harry's professor anymore, but an old friend of his father's, he could explain just a little bit more.

"That joke never got old," Sirius muttered, as they'd done that to each other all the time, though with more spirited fun of hiding behind a doorway and trying to freak out the others. It only served as yet another painful reminder though, that the rat had fallen for that trick the most and often retaliated by trying to shoot a curse at them no matter how many times they repeated it and it had always been funny. Great, now he couldn't even think on his map without getting a cold and murderous chill.

Clearly seeing something was bothering Sirius, Harry quickly asked, "I've just thought of something. If Remus was watching us all night, how come he wouldn't have seen me and Hermione twice on that?"**

Remus did a double take at Harry, nodding and saying, "now that's a fair question, but I think it was the timing of it all. I would have turned on the map at about the time I was done with my own exams, to watch you lot head down to Hagrid's. We know Hagrid's Hut itself can't actually be seen on the map, so the doppelgangers wouldn't have been seen any more than the original trio. When you guys left, the second Harry and Hermione would have been following along in the edge of the Forest of their own progress, perhaps still just out of sight of the maps range. By the time Sirius collided with Ron and dragged him and," he grimaced for a moment but still managed to get out the name without biting his tongue off, "Scabbers underground, I would have been sprinting out the door and probably not paying too much attention to anything anymore." He looked around like he was expecting someone to argue with him, but when no one did he concluded. "The only instance where I possibly would have seen them both was when Harry and Hermione are first in the closet after they've time-turned back, and the trio were on their way down to Hagrid's. The only way I can explain this is that I hadn't opened the map to see this yet."

"Makes as much sense as anything that happened that night," James snorted.

"Remus!" Lily snapped. "You're being ridiculous!"

"How so?" He shot back, trying for a pleasant tone. "How are you not trying to strangle me and agree with me, I nearly bit Harry. I could have killed those kids because of my oversight, and what if it happens again? I won't let some accident hurt anybody, and Sirius won't be around next time."

"But that was-" James tried to add, but Remus was being adamant.

"A onetime event, but what if it happened again? I'm actually happy I'm not taking the risk."

The others were at their wits end with him, but what could they do? They couldn't force him to keep the job, it was just maddening that something like this had been taken away from him. Remus was a good teacher, by far the best one Harry had yet in that subject, but more than that it would have just been nice for him to be on hand more for whatever mayhem Harry was clearly going to get into. It was hard enough for him to keep down a job, especially one as good as this.

James and Sirius still blamed the rat for this happening, linking Remus' fall from his certainty in the job to his interference, yet another thing he'd ruined in their life.

Lily couldn't help but blame Severus, he'd gone and told everyone about this for a petty justice he thought he deserved. The students would tell their parents and Remus would be terrified of what the public would think of him, and he'd lose every last drop of faith he should have in himself. That potion was good for him, but she couldn't begin to imagine how expensive it was, plus Remus wasn't that good at potions himself. So this all meant he was probably going to go back to a relatively closed off, and pained life. Remus had been very right in saying Sirius wouldn't be around to help, with any luck he'd left the country and wouldn't be coming back until his name was cleared.

Harry was the most monstrously disappointed, still grumbling, "but you're the best Defense teacher I ever have." He still meant it with the utmost sincerity, he didn't need his memories to reinforce that assured feeling. It would have been even better now that he knew of Remus' connection to his father, and with Sirius gone out of the country with any luck, he would have liked someone closer by, but he wasn't getting anything from that. With the gentlest of prodding he tried to deduce that he never got that close to Remus. He didn't even think he'd remained in his life all that much, which just wasn't adding up with what he felt now. It left him confused and hurt and still he couldn't help but think that he never got an answer for this.

Remus though was thinking on something else, that maybe if he was lucky he had quit for a totally different reason than his lycanthropy. After all if his assumption was right and Dumbledore had convinced him of Sirius' actions, then everything had come out properly, well that meant that Remus would have turned on Dumbledore. If he was lucky, he may well have stood up to the headmaster and said something about it, maybe quit in some shot of spite for what he'd been convinced of. That may have been giving himself too much credit though, he'd proved time and again he'd back Dumbledore's play no matter what. He didn't really want to keep bringing the idea up, but he wanted so badly for it to be true he offered that to the others. Sirius actually smiled, he rather liked that idea of Remus telling off the headmaster. When no one else put up an argument for it, Remus decided to keep going.

"Always a good idea," James sighed, still not happy, but willing to hear Remus out. "Even if the map showed no one else there, I wouldn't put it past half the paintings in that school to go chatting."

That at least gave them all a shot of relief. Whatever wrongdoings Dumbledore had done to Sirius, at least he'd made up for them in that action of protecting Remus. He had been at Hogwarts on Dumbledore's orders, so he'd better have stood up for him. Sirius knew he would have wound up in Azkaban all over again if he heard otherwise.

"Clearly not hard enough, as he's still breathing," James snarled.

Lily began swearing colorfully under her breath all over again, unable to believe he'd done something so horrid and cruel. Snape had better have been fired for that as well, it just wasn't right he could get away with doing that to Remus!

Remus couldn't help but notice how he hadn't actually answered Harry's question, maybe giving him a little more hope for his own idea, but it still wasn't enough. It would never be enough for what he owed Sirius for believing that lie, but if leaving this job and with any luck actually helping Sirius now, perhaps spending his now free time looking for the rat while Sirius was safe, then he'd take the trade any day.

"They can bite me," Sirius snapped! Remus had gone to school with most of those people, Dumbledore should have pointed out to all of them that Remus wasn't dangerous, stuck by his Professor as much as he'd surely done for Snape when he'd been hired fresh as a Death Eater. He really wished Harry had sat in on that conversation, because if Dumbledore hadn't done everything in the world to convince Remus to stay then he was going to have a shit fit all over again.

"Or ever will have," Harry still agreed.

"Maybe it won't be permanent," Lily offered hopefully. "Maybe once that rat is caught, and Sirius' name is cleared, maybe Remus will get it through his thick head he's needed at that school."

Everyone else wanted to look like they believed that, but the fact that Harry didn't add anything but instead just gave a slight frown wasn't encouraging.

They all sighed, grateful and at least agreeing that if Remus had to leave at least he'd left with something good behind him.

Harry couldn't resist the bright smile that crept over his face all over again, words didn't describe how happy he was his patronus had been his own father, that he'd finally gotten to see the magnificent animal that had spent countless nights protecting his brother from himself. He still couldn't help but wonder though, if he was an animagus, he'd clearly be a stag as well, but what would he look like? So similar to his father that they'd hardly be able to be told apart even then?

"I thought you pocketed that in the Shack?" Lily frowned.

"Don't look at me," Remus frowned, as that had been the last time he'd heard it mentioned as well.

"Maybe I found it on the grounds and put it in there," Sirius shrugged, that being unlikely as he didn't really think he could spot that from the air on Buckbeak, but he also liked the idea that he wouldn't have just up and left without saying goodbye to Remus. Maybe he had thought back to Remus, and found him after he transformed and dragged him back to the Shack, and found the cloak along the way. Maybe he'd wanted to make sure Remus woke up with a friend at the end of his bed one last time before he had to leave for how long. It didn't sit right with him if he really hadn't considered Remus at all after his own freedom was offered.***

"Hopefully the good kind," James added on happily, thinking it was high time his son use that for its intended purpose.

Lily didn't even disagree anymore, she'd happily take hearing her son pull some goofy prank rather than constantly worrying about his life at this point.

"Well he's got you there," Sirius agreed with a real laugh.

"I can't deny I'm disappointed it took you three years, and you didn't even find the first on your own," James sighed, wagging his finger in mock scolding at his son, causing him to laugh all the harder.

"So that's actually your tank then," Lily muttered. "Why do you even have that?"

"For fun," Remus rolled his eyes at her. He was known to randomly catch wild animals and study them before releasing them again, he actually had a niffler at his house right now he was most likely keeping in that tank, though thankfully as they lived off of dirt and he'd left plenty in there he wasn't worried about it going hungry.

Though still disappointed and argumentative on the subject that Remus should keep his butt right where he was, the others noticed for the first time Remus was acting a little odd around Dumbledore as well. Maybe Remus' idea wasn't all that crazy.

Harry couldn't help but frown, he had a bad feeling he wasn't going to be seeing Professor Lupin for some time, and it wasn't making him feel any better.

"That's not your fault at all," the four of them all tried to say at the same time, making Harry try to shy away at so many people half yelling at him at once.

Remus, James, and Lily gave a quick pause when they realized they'd startled him, but Sirius kept going, "Harry you must realize that wasn't your fault. What were you supposed to do?"

"I even went back in time and couldn't do anything about it," Harry shot back, still frowning deeply, wishing he could have taken Hermione's Time Turner and still tried something!

"What am I, chopped liver?" He demanded right back. It still stung, that Harry had to rescue him at all when it should have been the other way around. Yes he was eternally grateful, but he should be the one protecting Harry, not causing even more problems with his life! Still he kept up his point, "you did exactly what you were expected to do, help out my sorry arse. Now come on pup, I'll get upset all over again if you're really going to be stubborn on this."

Harry couldn't help a light laugh then, surprised that he actually did feel better. If Sirius didn't blame him, the one person who'd been most affected by the rats getting away, then maybe it really wasn't his fault.

Remus and Lily smiled, pleased Sirius had gotten through to him, but James couldn't help that feeling again. Something he'd never felt before wanting to make an appearance, like he should have been the one to comfort Harry about that. Why would it bother him now though, Sirius was doing just fine.

"Oh wow," Remus muttered.

"Yeah, I forgot all about that," Sirius said with some real annoyance. She really couldn't have thrown a name into that stupid prophecy. Some other clue that would have made his life a lot easier to cope with! Even if he had been the one to convince the others this Professor was a real Seer, he now probably disliked her the most of all.

Harry couldn't help a little snort, at least the Headmaster admitted it.

Harry gave a terrible shiver at that remembrance, and he wasn't the only one. Now that Sirius wasn't having his life ruined by that, he considered all of the words all over again and felt bile curling his stomach as he realized how true that felt. It wasn't real though, right? Voldemort wasn't really going to come back, all because of that rat? At least now he didn't really think it was his fault, but he got the feeling no one had really convinced him of that in his own time.

The others weren't feeling much better. They recognized Trelawney had clearly made a real prediction, but maybe they were lucky and it wasn't being literal. Maybe he wouldn't really 'come back' but...and they couldn't really think of any other way that could mean. Well, hopefully it still wouldn't have to deal with Harry, right? That could take years to happen, and Harry was safe here with them now, so they really didn't want to linger on that long.

Harry felt a little stirring in him, wondering why that felt significant. He remembered back to feeling he would be grateful he kept Trelawney's class, and he wondered if it had been because of this prediction about the rat and Voldemort, but he didn't really think so. Was it because of this other prediction then? Why would he care about that?

"With any luck, because he knows Voldemort coming back isn't ever going to be a problem," James muttered.

"Oh Harry," James quickly said this time, frowning slightly at him. "You can't really believe that one? You showed him mercy, that's a lot more kind than he deserved. They were still his actions though, his decisions, not one thing would be linked back to you."

"I'm still grateful you did as well," Sirius quickly added while Remus nodded vigorously. "If we had murdered him, then who knows, maybe I never would get my name cleared, because that rat couldn't admit to anything he did. I may not have been able to prove that was his body, but I'd done something to it to make it look like him. No, we needed him alive."

Harry had to chew on that for a moment before he nodded, finally admitting that while he would always feel guilty Peter got away, Sirius had been kept alive and that was the important part. He nodded his agreement and while Sirius and Remus looked happy enough to move on James couldn't help a lingering frown, a tickle of annoyance that yet again Sirius had gotten through to Harry while he hadn't.

'Which is a hell of a lot more than he deserves' James still couldn't help but snarl, wishing they could change the subject again already as the longer this dragged on the more agitated he got.

"Something which will bite both of them in the arse," Remus said pleasantly, hoping Harry would stay well away from that, but enjoying the irony for as long as he could.

"Like when I saved you," Lily added on. "That wasn't a spell, it was an action that created magic, not something you can or can't do on purpose."

Harry was still frowning, hating to think he had any connection to that rat for what he did, but he leaned a little closer into his mother anyways and let it go for now.

Harry considered that for a moment, and realized that Dumbledore may have been speaking the truth. He had no idea why, it was a very faint feeling, but something in him was agreeing with Dumbledore, and he hoped it was worth it.

James sighed and looked away from everyone. He still didn't know what he'd do when the time came and they could leave this place, when he knew for a fact Sirius and Remus might still go and act on that now before the rat even saw it coming. Would James join them, would he try to stop them, or would he stand by and do nothing which would be just as bad as either option. He hated himself right then, for not wanting Peter dead for what he did to them, but he still couldn't bring himself to want his death either. And yet when he looked him in the face again, would that still be true? Wormtail, one of his brothers. Maybe Dumbledore was right, but it didn't make him happy either.

"Nope, that never gets old," Harry smiled brightly, trying to catch his dad's eye as they were all well aware of the battle warring in him right now, none of them feeling they had a right to make the decision for him, he had to come to grips with that on his own just like before. Harry did want though to keep his mind on something more pleasant until then, so he kept going even though his dad wouldn't really look at him. "I never get tired of hearing that, makes me happy every single time."

James heard that alright, and gave him a bright eyed look right back.

Remus still couldn't read that without a hitch in his voice, the news never getting easier to hear, the act that had caused it now more fresh and disturbing than ever before, but James was still distractedly smiling at his son and so Remus kept going past that.

James was so giddy he was nearly bouncing, because that's exactly what he'd wanted. Even if it had only been in spirit, he had been there for his son when he'd been needed most. Sirius could give all the advice he wanted, at least James had that! His brain gave a quick little pause, realizing what he'd just thought and for the first time understanding what might have been bothering him, but then he got distracted by Sirius blurting out, "ah, what? How did he know about Prongs?"

Remus was frowning down at that, wondering if perhaps he'd finally told Dumbledore?

"Oh," Sirius shrugged. "Guess I really did tell him everything."

"Well I suppose that's a good thing at least," Lily sighed, this also meant that Dumbledore would also know about the rat's animagus as well, he'd be much easier to find with Dumbledore and Remus looking for both personas of the traitor.

Harry and James were beaming at each other, more happy then they'd ever been that they at least had this to identify with to each other, something that couldn't just be put down to a genetic look or old possessions. Harry truly emulated his father right then and forever with that one simple spell.

"That seems to be a running theme for you," Remus rolled his eyes, "you getting caught up in the mess, and at the end of the year everyone else trying to catch up."

"I'd like to think that if anyone did guess that well, they'd put Trelawney out of a job," Lily laughed.

"Oh boy," Sirius groaned, his eyes narrowing with distaste. Now that he realized his own life had been saved because of that hippogriff, he felt insanely protective of the beast, which made Malfoy's actions this year all the more loathsome to him.

"Ha," Remus snapped, happy that Malfoy hadn't actually been able to get away with anything this year.

"Oh great," James groaned in disgust, he already didn't like this one, he really didn't want to hear anymore failing statements about his brother now that he knew the absolute truth.

Lily on the other hand couldn't help but be interested. While she would curse anyone who tried to use those on Sirius, she could think of plenty of other people those could do some good towards. Percy was clearly a smart and ambitious boy, she did want to hear these things and see how they could be put to use.

All four of them couldn't help but be in absolute agreement with him. Between Remus leaving, Sirius still being on the run, and the rats escape plus the horrid rise and fall of hope of wanting more than anything for James to have been alive, this was by far the worst year for them to have lived through.

"I'd prefer the werewolf," Sirius grumbled with distaste.

Remus couldn't get that out completely coherent. He may agree with his friends, the rats actions had nothing to do with Harry's decision, he'd done the right thing, but it didn't erase the black hatred he possessed whenever the name was mentioned, whenever he realized all over again what he'dbecome and what he was going to do to James, Lily and Sirius.

"Oh," Lily moaned, placing her face in her hands and nearly bursting into tears all over again at that. In the following events that had led her to worry about Sirius' life, she'd almost forgotten about that horrid reminder but now it was back full force. It just wasn't fair that this had been ripped away from Harry and Sirius, that he was forced back with those horrid excuse for people. His return would be made all the bitter because of what that rat had done, his hand being the one to wrench all of that away.

Sirius couldn't help but wriggle with displeasure. Of course he wanted that to, to be that missing piece of James for Harry, but it hurt terribly that he'd have to play the role at all. James should be there for his son, to be the scolding parent and happy go lucky father all in one, while Sirius could be the goofy Uncle and help him get away with everything.

James couldn't help in that moment leaning away from Sirius slightly. Of course he still wanted Harry away from the Dursleys, of course he wanted Harry to have a proper home life, but it still didn't erase his rising fear that he was only just beginning to realize he had.

"Not impossible," Lily said at once, watching all of them take several steps back in their mood with displeasure. "It just might take a little more time." What they wouldn't give for Harry to even have gone on the run with Sirius than go back to Privet Drive, after the cupboard and starvation and whatever else Harry wouldn't speak about, anything Sirius could provide would be better than that!

"I didn't even know he could do that," Harry admitted, "it was just a guess."

"Well, I'm not really sure, but I wouldn't be surprised either," Remus couldn't help with some blistering hatred still lingering as it was made clear Snape still had his job.

Sirius couldn't help a low whine of fear, he'd been afraid of this but now his earlier joke had come back and it wasn't nearly as satisfying as he'd thought. He'd been so sure that he and Remus could step in and Harry would tell them whenever Snape did something to horrible and the two of them could tell Snape to shove it for Harry! Now neither of them were around, and Harry was the only one left to take the fall for all of Snape's built up hatred, and it just wasn't just!

Lily's throat vibrated she made such a scathing noise, she wanted to jack slap him all the way to the Whomping Willow and let that tree finish off the rest of him she was so sick of him. She'd thought he'd hit his low in calling her that word back in fifth year, and she just kept being proven how wrong she was but the hurt had stopped chapters ago, now she was left with simmering hatred that was going to boil over on him the second she could.

"How would they know that?" Remus chuckled in surprise, "they wouldn't get the results until summer."

"I, have no idea," Harry said, blinking in shock as well. "I suppose with their dad being in the Ministry, maybe they got a heads up that they at least passed a few, and just guessed the rest. I just remember them talking about it is all."

"Well good for them anyways," Lily sighed, finding at least one thing to smile about again.

All five of them gave great sighs, wishing the story would just end there, wanting more than anything to move to the part already where the most eventful part of Harry's next year of school would be him reading in the paper about the capture of the rat and Sirius arriving on the next holiday break. The fact that Remus kept going just wasn't giving them any pleasure, and they didn't see how it could.

"What, are you telling me she actually got tired of being tired?" Sirius rolled his eyes.

"And she still got a perfect score!" James balked.

"But, but she didn't even use it for anything fun," Remus couldn't help but whine. "She had that thing for a whole year and only used it on homework."

"Well I'm happy to hear that," Lily sighed, "that poor thing needs more of a break, if she went another year like that I'd be even more worried for her."

That at least gave them a little chuckle again, yes Ron clearly knew exactly what he was doing.

"I'm sure he gets enough of a lesson at home," Harry corrected, fondly remembering most conversations with Mr. Weasley started or ended with something to do with Muggles.

"It's what!" All four boys perked up like the sun anew. Lily couldn't help a girlish giggle at that, she would hear about twenty more Quidditch matches then the disaster of a year she'd just lived through.

"Oh please Harry, I'm begging, tell me you go," James moaned, clasping his hands together as if in actual prayer.

"I sure hope so," Harry nodded back eagerly, he had a very good feeling about this!

"With any luck Ron wouldn't have mentioned it without having some way to listen in as well," Remus pacified, his own eyes lighting up with hope at the possibility.

"That's even better," Sirius practically squealed. "Can you imagine hearing about an international game through Harry! He'll get to see the professionals at work, oh glory I think I'm going faint-" and he was actually jittering around so much he may not have been joking.

"Relax Padfoot," Remus had to restrain himself from laughing to hard. "Don't go wetting yourself before it even starts."

Harry was laughing too hard to respond, the longer he thought about it the more sure he had been right, or at least he really hoped so and this was one good thing to be looking forward to.

"Thank you for that lovely reminder," Lily forced a laugh this time, her bad mood still lingering enough Harry had to go back at all, that this would be the first time he'd be face to face with them since Harry had left that place. She still couldn't help but ask "why couldn't you just stay at the Leaky Cauldron again until Ron's parents would let you come around?"

"I asked Dumbledore," Harry groaned, "and he said Tom wouldn't allow it, as I'm still underage and would need consent again, apparently the Minister gave it the first time but wouldn't again."

They had to suck in air very carefully to prevent themselves from screaming about that all over again, wishing Dumbledore and the Minister would stop making decisions for Harry already. Couldn't he at least go stay with Remus! It would be tricky, but surely they could have worked out something other than this!

"Can't even blame you," Remus couldn't help a light snicker, at least happy he had another line or two before he had to think on the end of the train again.

"Oh yeah," James asked, trying to perk himself back up.

Well that was an odd way to start, but Harry had said it was something happy, so none of them could even get worked up about it, instead Remus kept going with heavy interest.

"Aw," Lily couldn't help but coo with a smile, wondering who on earth that could be from, but knowing mail always made her son happier.

"Jeez, that thing is tiny if it'll fit in your palm," Remus raised a brow in surprise.

"Uh oh," they all couldn't help but say a little indulgently, no one able to pick a bad feeling towards the ginger cat after what he'd done for Sirius this year.

Sirius couldn't help but laugh, wondering why the little owl hadn't swooped back out when it was done with its task, but finding Ron's actions nice enough.

"What?" They yelped in shock.

"Sirius, why would you be sending me mail," Harry frowned in concern. "Wouldn't someone be able to trace that back to you?"

"Oh no," Sirius brushed that off, that hadn't been why he was surprised. "It's plenty easy to make yourself untraceable, paranoid old gits do it all the time when they think the Ministry's out to get them, which they're probably right about," he finished absently. "I can send mail and not have the owl unable to trace it back to me with a spell or two, no I'm just surprised I'd send it so early."

"I'd have thought you'd wait at least a month, you know put some believability into the idea that you aren't in contact with Harry, rather than on the train when anyone could have seen that," Remus explained their confusion.

"Oh," Harry shrugged, that hadn't been what was bothering him at all, he always rode with just Ron and Hermione.

Sirius muttered something under his breath that made James and Remus give an almost cruel laugh, and though Harry and Lily may not have been opposed to whatever he'd just suggested, neither really wanted to ask for details either.

"There's that Marauder brain I've missed hearing about," Remus said fondly, he just knew Sirius had to have some sense still about him.

"Where would you have gotten him anyways," Harry couldn't help but ask, when he realized Sirius wouldn't have explained that.

"Probably found him in the wild," Sirius shrugged. "It's a lot more rare to find intelligent owls that aren't wizard bred up for the job, but it's not impossible either."

"Sirius," Lily began with worry, but hoping he had a good idea of why Sirius would do this, James waved her down so Remus could keep going.

"Oh," Lily still pouted, but then acknowledged, "yes, well I guess that's alright. Just please at least tell me you let them spot you from a long ways off, even Muggles could be dangerous if they catch sight of you."

"Worry wart," Sirius returned fondly, loving he could still pick on her at all for this and receiving the glare she gave him with pride.

"What a shocker," James rolled his eyes with a laugh.

"Never saw that coming," Remus snickered.

"And still with the 'I told you so's from her," Lily couldn't help but chuckle, still finding the girls faults more human than alienating. "Hasn't she learned anything this year?"

"Don't take so many classes," Sirius shrugged.

"Yes, owls tend to do that a lot," James smirked, his own owl Click having a knack for doing that whenever he delivered a letter.

"See, it wasn't difficult at all," Sirius laughed happily, joyfully imagining the confusion on those shopkeepers face at the cat delivering such odd instructions, but happy it had worked out for the best for his pup!

"It most certainly is," Harry agreed cheerfully, wishing he had it now, to share with his whole family and take another spin on it, wondering why that would cause another bump in his throat.

'Wish you'd gotten around to asking him why he left' Remus couldn't help but think, still wanting more than anything for Sirius to go teach them a lesson about how they'd treated their Harry, but he didn't want to ruin the good mood again so soon so he hurried past that.

"Perhaps a bit," Harry smiled lightly, now wishing he'd caught many more glimpses of that Grim, as it was the most important dog in the world to him, and not exactly liking that aching that wouldn't seem to go away, reminding him of how long he should be expecting the wait for the next glimpse.

That gave them all a perk of interest, what on earth could Sirius have wrangled together for Harry on the run?

"So, was that spell like, specialized or something?" Harry asked, scratching his head as he tried to work out this complex bit of magic he'd never heard of.

"Well, yes," Sirius shrugged, trying to think of the most basic way to explain it. "I could change the spell just slightly so that only your designated letters would find me."

"You know I have been wondering though, if that spell wasn't placed on Harry long ago," Lily couldn't help but point out now that she thought about this.

"Why's that?" James scoffed.

"Well, Harry is the famous Boy Who Lived," Lily shrugged, always hating the reminder, but willing to say it to work this out loud. "That's got to come with say, some kids wanting to write to him, he is almost like a celebrity. I can't believe not one kid would have addressed an owl to him in their youth, but Harry never received a scrap of mail. If Dumbledore could wrangle together to get your key like he did first year, maybe he placed that no messages spell on you as well, and lifted it for Dumbledore himself through the Hogwarts letters, Ron, Hermione, Hagrid, and now Sirius. Of course that wouldn't count for the Improper Use of Magic Office, you can't get out of the trace."

"I, guess," Remus frowned, it did make some sense, even if it did bother them all the more, since any mention of Dumbledore now came with the added irritation of whatever he did to their lives, and really wishing he'd stop interfering already. If he hadn't done this, then Harry would have known his whole life he was a wizard and those Dursleys could have possibly backed off all the sooner. It hadn't happened though, and this was still more speculation than outright answers, so since Harry had no idea of the possibilities himself he just waved Remus on.

"Yes!" James yelped with joy, catching Sirius by surprise by hugging him and still laughing. Sirius wasn't so unobservant he hadn't noticed James acting a little shifty, but he hadn't understood why which is why he was all the more happy he seemed to have done something good in that moment.

"How would you have even known he couldn't?" Lily couldn't help but ask between laughing. "That hadn't come up in your five minute conversation."

"I am positive I've been sending letters with Remus as well," Sirius shrugged, "maybe he mentioned it."

"I am a little disappointed," Remus couldn't actually say that with a straight face, he was smiling as well but still kept going, "now Harry won't have any reason to use that secret passage anymore."

"I'm sure Harry will still find plenty of reason to get into trouble," Lily giggled.

Sirius couldn't help a violent snort of laughter, well he wasn't wrong, but at least this was his way of making up for attacking Ron that night, offering up an owl in return. What an odd way to phrase that though.

"Well that backs up that you must have found him in the wild or something," Lily giggled, "I can't see you going through an Owl shop and buying him, or stealing him from someone either."

"Hopefully Molly and Arthur won't say anything," Remus chuckled.

James couldn't help but do a double take, Ron's parents never really having occurred to him before, but suddenly wondering just how much Ron would tell them about this year. If Ron could convince his parents of Sirius' innocence, then that would be yet more people on his brother's side to help him. If he even got Percy to believe it, that would be all the better with his career path, it would do some good for someone in government to know the truth. Ron would have to be careful though, he couldn't go spouting too much before his family really believed the truth or all three kids could do more harm than good.

Harry broke out laughing, thinking that all of their problems could have been solved a lot sooner if Ron had done that in the first place to Scabbers, cracking up even more at the idea of Ron being suspicious of an owl and not even being able to blame him.

"There's a sentence you don't get to hear much," Lily gave a halfhearted laugh, wanting to find as much amusement as Harry, but the reminder only causing her more hatred again, as well as the boys.

"So glad someone got their wish this year," James muttered with sincerity.

Sirius still beamed with pleasure, happy that he could still do some good for Harry from afar. His pup would never again have to wonder if he had someone to turn to, someone out there to look after him.

Which didn't make his murder suspicions any better upon hearing of those useless excuses of caregivers all over again. He wished he could have arrived on that platform for Harry instead, wanted to be able to walk right up to them and deck them a good one and take Harry far away.

Lily still found it a bleeding miracle they showed up at all to pick up Harry, wondering at what their motives for that could be, knowing that either Harry didn't know or wouldn't tell her anyways.

"Well how dare Harry ever receive a hug," Lily scathed, more venom then she'd expected making an appearance the more often she heard about Mrs. Weasley doing this, but her terrible theory confirmed and wondering if Mrs. Weasley was the only bleeding person to ever give Harry a hug! She wrapped an arm tight around him now to at least comfort herself.

James gave a lackluster sigh, never having believed the idea of a Quidditch World Cup could be dampened, but hearing about those stupid Dursleys actually did the trick.

"I will tear every last one of your limbs off if you ever say that again," Sirius vowed, his eyes narrowing into cold slits while something else gave him a happy spark. So he couldn't be there for Harry in person, but if Harry set this up right, he could be in another more important way.

Remus was so eager to hear if he was reading this right he couldn't even bring himself to make a crack about that.

"What a lovely way to start," James beamed, bouncing in place and making baby Harry trill with laughter.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes," Lily cheered, doing a little happy dance. If that didn't scare those Dursleys into treating Harry right then nothing would!

That wasn't the happy ending they'd all wanted, so many things had been left unresolved and they were just so tired of at the end of everything Harry was still forced back into their presence, but for now they'd take whatever happiness they could find, knowing by now it wasn't meant to last.

 **THE END**

"That's the end of this one," Remus finally breathed in relief as he gave it a careless toss away from him.

"Finally," Sirius moaned, slumping back and running his hand across his face. "Remind me to skip the next one."

"No way," Harry yelped in protest, now trying for a frown but just unable to keep the expression as he teased, "then I'd miss out on all the Sirius/ serious jokes."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Lily scoffed, trying to lounge a bit more comfortably as she noticed the time. It was still too early for the next meal, but she had something even more important she wanted to discuss. She didn't really want to bring it up, but she turned to Remus with regret filled eyes and began carefully, "Remus dear, we need to have a talk."

"I know," he agreed at once, some color coming into his pasty skin, though it was red tinted with shame and some fear. His eyes flickered to the baby in James lap and away again, his hands starting to tremble as the idea just kept replaying in his head of what he'd almost done to that baby, what he could do tonight. For a wild moment he wanted to suggest that he should try to leave. Most likely the same thing would happen to him, he'd be knocked out for trying to vacate and the true monster should be as well...but what if that didn't happen? He'd never yet seen magic that would affect his transformation, so what if he did go on a rampage and possibly hurt someone? He couldn't ask Harry to come, it would be far too dangerous either way. Either Harry would be out there alone with him unconcious, or he'd have to single handedly deal with a full grown werewolf.

"You guys are overreacting," Sirius scoffed, placing his elbow carelessly on Remus' shoulder and trying for an offhand tone. "The three of us will barricade ourselves in one of the guest rooms, we'll repair whatever damage we'll make, and be done with it. Moony won't get past us," he finished, gesturing at himself and James for emphasis. "Then I'll come back down here, crash on the couch for a day, and we'll all be good to go."

"Just one problem," Harry frowned, "you should sleep in an actual bed."

Sirius made to shrug that off, but Harry cut him off.

"No way," Harry insisted, a set look in place and crossing his arms. He looked so much like James in that moment Sirius actually had to do a double take. "I've heard how bad this was going to get, and you should get a real bed. I'm sleeping down here tonight, I don't get special treatment."

"Looks like you lost Pads," James snickered as he stretched to stand up.

Remus rolled his eyes to cover a scowl as he muttered something about going to the bathroom and exited the room.

* * *

Insane girly squealing taking place probably in the background even as you're reading this! I cannot believe I've actually completed three books in a row! There was a lot of hype and build up for this book, and I hope I did it justice! Please let me know what you liked or didn't like!? Got any plot holes or questions in general you want to see me dissect? Got two more chapters to post before I create 4, just because I really couldn't cram everything into the bottom of this one this time. Promise it will come up very soon, ain't no way I'm stopping now!

Thoughts on Prisoner of Azkaban:

The beginning, set up, and basically anything I've ever said previously regarding this series, still holds true 98% through the largest of portions through this book. It never felt like it was dragging to me, once again I was completely thrown off by the bang of a plot twist at the end, the setup of some small backstory on Harry's dad was done beautifully but never felt forced, there is a reason this is my second favorite book in the series. My only reserve on this book is the time travel plot at the end, which I've stated my opinion on, but even that's done so well I can't find nearly as much to complain about as I can in other medias this is done. The wonderful world of Harry Potter has successfully done one of my biggest problems of a plot and gotten away with it beautifully because of the way in which it happened. 9/10 for me! You cannot skip this book by any means, it holds too much for what happens in later books, and why would you with characters like these?

*Question offered by nahte123456! Thank you for the endless discussions you always offer!

** Question offered by maana999, kudos to you, I've never seen anyone ask this, hope you like my explanation.

***I've got a second story called Moon and Stars where Remus and Sirius do have a proper goodbye.


	23. Acceptance

"Hey, Harry, can I talk to you for a sec?"

Harry looked surprised but pleased as he followed Sirius into the kitchen, where Sirius watched him for a moment with a small smile before beginning, "ah, didn't get a chance to say it earlier in the mess of it all, but you don't ever have to apologize for hugging me."

Harry blushed deep crimson and looked about ready to apologize for apologizing, when Sirius laughed and threw an easy arm around him, saying, "relax pup. It's been a long, stressful few days, and I needed it, so thanks."

Harry was practically wiggling in pleasure at the affection, but still felt the need to explain himself, "it's just, I ah, I don't ever really remember hugging anyone like that before."

Sirius really hoped that, even though he couldn't be there for Harry with a home life he deserved right away, something would give and they'd both get what they wanted, and surely Harry would remember plenty of hugs from Sirius then. With so much practice of late Sirius could almost bat away how heartbreaking that was with hardly any notice, focusing on the here and now as he promised, "well like I said, you can do it as often as you like now. Pretty sure your own parents and Remus wouldn't mind from time to time either."

Harry couldn't help but laugh aloud at that.

Lily couldn't help but smile to herself as she walked up the stairs, the infectious sound of Harry's laughter bringing a smile to her own face as she moved to open her baby's room, when she heard something odd from the guest room.

Switching from one doorknob to the other she gave a gentle knock and called softly, "Remus?" She got no reply, and feeling a mounting sense of worry she cracked the door open and poked her head inside to find him seemingly passed out on the bed. She felt silly, she'd probably just heard him snore or something, when he made it again. He was curled up on his side and facing the wall, so she couldn't even properly see him, but then she reflected that Remus normally slept sprawled out so this really wasn't normal.

She'd never seen him transform before, and couldn't help but feel even more fear creeping into her, but then she reminded herself James and Sirius were being very clear, she'd even heard a firsthand account of it. Remus wouldn't transform until the exact time the moon was at its highest peak, and both boys had insisted that wasn't at least for another few hours' time.

Bolstering herself, she quickly walked over to his side and placed her hand on his shoulder, shaking it firmly and calling out his name more loudly this time.

"Go away," he grumbled. Despite how exhausted his voice sounded, she detected no hints of sleep from it, so she'd been right and something else was definitely bothering him.

"Not a chance," she replied, sitting down nearly on top of his legs to prove her point.

"You know it's moments like this I understand why you fell for James back," he groused, tearing the pillow up and throwing it over his head in a further attempt to ignore her even while he spoke. "You act just like him sometimes."

"I'll take that as a compliment right now," she responded pleasantly, still watching every inch of him with heightening worry. "You going to tell me what's wrong, or am I going to have to go get him then you can tell us both."

He muttered something indistinctly, and then he made that noise she'd heard again, and she finally recognized it as him repressing a sob.

"Oh Remus," she sighed reaching out to place a comforting hand on him, but then he snarled back, "Don't," with so much venom her hand froze in place of its own accord.

"Don't," he repeated, his voice only slightly more restrained. "I can't stand any more comfort from the lot of you. I can't ignore them when they come in here later, Merlin knows why they're still going to bother, just leave Lily."

She rested her hand on him then anyways, ignoring his jerk of protest. "They are coming in here for the exact same reason I'm not going away until I have to. We're still your friends Remus, your family, and if watching Sirius these past few days hasn't proved anything to you then I don't know what will. We're not giving up, on either of you."

He still didn't respond, and she decided to go with a new tactic, one she'd kept bottled up for far too long. She could well guess that Remus was either still tearing himself up about what he almost did to Harry, or still dwelling on what Peter had done to him. She decided to focus on the second, as she could at least relate to that. "You feel like you should have done something more, fought harder and never let him pull away, but at the same time you keep thinking you're lucky you've found out. At least now you can stop pretending, stop acting like you've never noticed all the signs. You hate yourself all the more for thinking it," Remus finally twitched the pillow off his face and twisted his head around to glance at her, "and yet you feel like something's finally gone and you can breath and see again."

Remus sat up then, giving her a half suspicious look and trying to hide a smile. "Did you sneak a potion into all of our drinks, you able to read our minds now?"

"No," she told him, now tucking her sons blanket in a little tighter around him. "Just experience."

It only took a moment before Remus nodded, whispering, "guess we were all waiting around for the wrong kind of explosion." It's not like they had forgotten Severus and Lily had once been friends, kind of hard to forget that, but it hadn't really occurred to Remus she must have felt at least some of what they were feeling now. Angry was the only thing that ever really came to mind if he had ever sat around and thought about it, but it wasn't until now Remus realized that Lily had been through something very similar to this once before. Snape had basically called her out and left her to the sharks when he'd turned on her that day, and as far as any of them knew he'd never looked back. Peter wasn't the first friend of Lily's to join the Death Eaters looking for something. He couldn't help himself though, he fought back with words that spilled out, "least you've finally admitted who he really was, least you didn't somehow lose your other friends trust along the way."

Lily gave him a wane smile now, gently reminding him, "as far as you lot are concerned, as Sirius has been oh so happy to remind me every chance he got, I've only just admitted yesterday how horrid a person Severus has turned into, I hardly think I can berate anyone for not seeing what's right in front of them. As for what could possibly have changed in less than a year's time that we wouldn't tell you something like that Remus-" she hated the words the moment she'd said them, watching him flinch like she'd just tossed a scalding dagger at him, but pressed on anyways, "I can't say, maybe it was Peter himself. Everybody in this world is terrified, lies and whispers will do terrible things, but that still doesn't excuse what we did. I'm not asking for your forgiveness, I'm just swearing on my life I'll not let it happen now."

"You," he began in shock, not really sure how she had come to that conclusion, "forgive me?" He returned, a real smile lighting him now. "I clearly do something to make you believe it, think I should be the one groveling."

"We can worry about blame all day love," she reminded gently, "or we can fix it. I choose the second." She didn't even hesitate to offer him Harry, asking him, "would you mind putting him down for me, I've been holding him so long my arms are likely to fall off soon."

He gave her a rouge grin, seeing right through that, but took the baby happily and cradled him for a moment as the two left, Remus going into the room while Lily padded back down the stairs. She could hear Sirius and Harry still talking boisterously in the kitchen, which confused her all the more when she saw her husband still slouched inside the living room, watching the entrance to the kitchen with something like longing on his face. She could almost instantly guess what he was feeling, so she walked over to his side and wrapped her arms tight around him as she whispered, "it's natural what you're feeling dear."

"Is that right?" He asked restlessly, his hand coming up to stroke her hair. "You can read my moods now."

She couldn't help but giggle at getting asked the same question in such a short amount of time, but said back, "you've never been very subtle about them," she reminded, peaking up and meeting his eyes.

James sighed as he looked away from her, whispering, "I know I should be happy, and I am! Harry's finally getting the start to a proper family through Sirius. It's just..." he trailed off with a hard swallow, unable to voice it aloud as it would only feel like another betrayal to his friends.

"It should be you," Lily finished for him.

James winced like she'd just slapped him, but his arms tightened around her all the more. He couldn't help it though, now that Lily had started it the words spilled out of him like a bursting dam. "Now we're going to hear about the rest of Harry's life, and he's going to make that connection to Sirius he always should have, and it's going to keep growing. What if, well what if he-" he trailed off pitifully. What if Sirius adopted Harry, which is something they were all praying for to get Harry away from those Dursleys, but then what if Harry forgot about him? That was stupid of course, as Harry had never even known him before now, so there wasn't anything to forget. He couldn't have picked a better person for Harry to start looking at as a father but his best friend, but it should have been him.

Lily seemed to understand perfectly though, nodding along and saying, "I know dear, it's the same thing I've been thinking since Harry met Molly. The way she takes care of him, I truly wouldn't be surprised if he grows up thinking of her as his mother, she's the only comparison he's ever had and she treats him as such whenever he's around. I couldn't be happier he's found that, but it doesn't make it fair that it wasn't us."

James buried his face in his wife's hair, the guilt at his brief spike of anger and jealousy at Sirius now combined with the happy peace he had knowing his son would be taken care of leaving him so emotionally drained he was almost happy he'd be spending the night as an animal, it was certainly easier to cope with these things in another body.

* * *

Lily finally gets to play the mother and comfort she'd been longing for these past few chapters, kind of sorry it took her so long to get to them, but now most of the bad feelings have been talked out, not erased completely mind you. Lot's more to come in the next book, the last chapter is the big build up I've been promising in showing off Remus' transformation which should be up in a very short few days, hope you enjoyed!


	24. The Full Moon

Maybe it was how stressed he'd been over the past few days, maybe it was the new environment that Moony had never been in, but whatever the reason, when his transformation was complete he hardly seemed to recognize his companions like usual.

It started off like normal, and clearly as painful as ever. Dark gray fur began sprouting all over, as his normally dark green eyes took on an amber glow, all the life of Remus Lupin draining out to be replaced by a senseless animal. His arms elongated, his jaw began tearing out of his face and even before the fangs sprouted a ferocious howl began ripping out of his throat.

Prongs and Padfoot were long since waiting, but they weren't prepared for his roaming eyes to land on them and lung right for Prongs' throat. It was like their first meeting all over again, his desire to bite winning out and those long powerful arms tried their best to latch onto the larger body, hot breath snapping towards a jugular, but Prongs tossed his head back and managed to drag himself out of the way just fast enough he only received a few deep scratches into his ribs while Padfoot collided with Moony the rest of the way knocking him off course. The two canines tossed around for a bit, Moony winning out the fight but the scuffle enough to make him pause and reassess. He released another guttural howl, now eyeing the bed and instead lunging onto that, ripping off one leg with a flick of ease and snapping it in between his teeth like a carrot, his claws digging into the carpet below like he was trying to burrow himself right out of the room.

Padfoot let out a little whimper, edging closer and sniffing gently, and when Moony's nose twitched back in his direction, dropping the block of wood and a snarl already turning his lips back, Padfoot dropped onto his belly and wagged his tail in a friendly gesture, his back legs still prepared to pounce away at a moment's notice.

Moony's nose was still twitching furiously, his ears falling back as if asking 'where are we' but at least they'd moved away from his more violent question of 'who are you?'

Prongs came prodding back forward, letting an antler drop down and edging his side in a rebuff for attacking him, before giving him an even firmer buff and now asking as if to play. Moony was in no mood, using a back leg to kick him away and nearly taking the others snout clean off as he began pacing the length of the room, growling horribly at the door now, a clear question 'why can't I stretch?'

The two of them still tried to rope him in and keep his better attention, jumping forward and acting as if still looking for a game, but Moony was in no mood, swiping and biting at either of them if they got too close. When he didn't hit fur, he began turning on himself and letting his own claws scratch against his own hide in frustration, but neither of the others would let that last long before they came forward and began the game again. It was a small room, so they each received far more injury than they had since their first night they'd pulled this off, the one and only difference being there wasn't a rat scampering in between all of their feet as a further distraction to all.

So the pattern continued long into the night, until the waning began. By this time Moony had absolutely destroyed the room, deep claw marks leaving great chunks in the wall Prongs could have stuck his head through if not for the magic keeping everything pinned in this room, and the bed was no better. It was just a scrap of material, so Remus came back into himself and landed on a mangled frame. Sirius was at his side in an instant, pulling his wand out and muttering some spells on instinct, coupling in a few he only knew because he'd looked them up, Madam Pomfrey had stopped questioning long ago why Remus' injuries had subsided after his fifth year but his friends had learned them anyways.

James double checked both of his friends, recognizing how terrible they both looked with Sirius sporting his own amount of injuries and realizing he probably didn't look much better, but not willing to leave the others in suspense a moment longer then he had to. It took quite a few minutes to undo all the charms they'd barricaded themselves inside with, and then he had to repeat the process to get inside his infant's room, but when he did get the door open he feared he'd have to duck another amount of spells he startled the two so bad.

"Bloody hell James," Lily moaned, darting to his side in seconds, her hands ghosting over a particular spot on his face which he'd technically deserved letting his antlers get caught from a swinging claw while the other had gone for his eyes. It had only been a glancing blow at the time, clearly it had developed into more. "You've never come back looking this bad."

Harry was hovering behind his mother, looking pearly white as he gave his father several once overs and stuttering out, "are, are you bleeding?"

"I'm going to live, I promise," he got out, pushing Lily's hands away when they went to pull up his robes and look at the wound. "He had a bad night, he's used to getting out more, it's nothing we can't handle, or haven't before. We know plenty of spells to heal the worst of it, we'll sleep off the rest."

Neither of them looked pleased, but James pressed on loudly, "did you two get any sleep?"

"No, of course not," his wife scoffed like she thought he was going mad. "We might not have been able to hear anything but that doesn't mean we couldn't stop thinking about it." Lily really couldn't help it though, she may have known James went and did this once a month, but never before down the hall from her where she couldn't do anything to help. Even if she did trust James and Sirius to handle him as well, she never could take her eyes off her baby, just in case something had gone wrong, just in case she'd needed to defend him from jaws with no man's mind behind them.

James gave a deep sigh, pulling them both into a tight hug and ignoring how hard that pulled at his side as he promised, "we're all fine. We're going to get Remus fixed up and then we're all going to get some sleep."

Lily looked like that was the last thing on her mind as she got out of his grip, grabbing hold of his hand and pushing him into the chair in the corner, pulling out her wand and beginning to cast her own healing charms.

* * *

In retrospect this may not be as big a deal as I made it out to be, just couldn't resist writing this in. Hope it was worth it.


End file.
